I was a bit nervous.Ā This was going to be my first time.Ā OK, it wasnāt really my first time.Ā Iād done it a couple times before by myself, got dirty with the encouragement of strangers on the Internet.Ā But this was my first time with a group and in person.Ā Hopefully they wonāt go too hard and Iāll be able to go all the way.Ā Iām talking of course about my first organized gravel bike ride.Ā What did you think I was talking about?
During the COVID years I did a couple of 100+ mile DIY gravel events that were meant to substitute for the Dirty Kanza race (since renamed Unbound as the original name was not woke), but the 2022 Shasta Gravel Hugger was my first organized event.Ā I signed up for the short course, the Half Hug, 65 miles, rather than the 100 mile course in order to minimize the amount of time my wife would be bored with nothing to do out in the sticks.Ā Also, because the event is in March, weather can be a wild card, and I didnāt want to risk being in the cold and wet that long.Ā It had snowed the first two years of the event, but the website assured us āIt canāt possibly snow three years in a row.ā
The snow started to fall as we drove through Mt. Shasta City on the way to the event.Ā We dropped below the snow line before reaching the town of Montague for the packet pickup, but the weather report was looking cold, blustery, and possibly snowy for the next day.Ā After packet pickup we went to check in to our hotel and grab some dinner in Yreka, the would-be capital of the great state of Jefferson.
The morning of race day was cold.Ā Luckily I brought all my clothing, but thereās a dilemma.Ā Too few clothes, and Iāll be cold.Ā Too many and Iāll start to sweat and get cold.Ā Of course the answer is layers, but I still need to carry those layers I remove somewhere.Ā I settled on a long insulated jersey, a long undershirt, a windproof vest over the top, a neck gaiter to keep the wind from going down my shirt, shoe covers to keep my feet dry and warm, a beanie for my ears and balding head, and long gloves.Ā The shoe covers were so damn tight it took me several minutes to pull them over my shoes.Ā I nearly cramped up pulling them on, and I was worried that Iād miss the start.
The start
Alas, I did make it to the start on time.Ā There was no dick measuring before this race.Ā It was too darn cold, and it would have been a dead heat with everyone being equal, even the women.Ā At 10 AM the race began, and we headed out of town to the east.Ā The group started to spread out as people found their own pace, those wanting to race speeding ahead, those like me who were just out for a ride dropping back.Ā Soon we turned south onto some gravel roads.Ā Snow flurries started to fall as we passed by Steven Seagalās ranch, but I didnāt feel under siege.Ā Instead, powered by a strong tailwind I felt hard to kill as we made good time down the road.
The man
At about mile 13 we turned east and headed toward the infamous Jeep Road.Ā Precipitation can turn the road into a mud pit, which is what happened the previous year as seen here.Ā (TW: the guyās voice and shaky camera might induce nausea.)Ā Given the previous dayās rain and snow I was worried that history would repeat.Ā As the road began, a lady rider asked if I had pre-ridden this section.Ā
āPre-ride?Ā I donāt need no stinkinā pre-ride.āĀ Ā
āPick your lines carefullyā she warned.Ā
Fortunately the road was dry and no worse than the roads I ride around home.Ā The only problem was a sand pit in about the last 100 yards.Ā I probably could have ridden it, but there were people falling and people walking, and the bike is hard to control in the sand.Ā I didnāt want to run anyone over, so I made an executive decision and got off and walked.
The sand
The road now turned north, which meant that the nice tailwind we had enjoyed was now a raging headwind, and it was going to be that way for the next 22 miles.Ā I got on the wheel of another rider to shelter from the wind.Ā Not wanting to be a total freeloader, I moved to the front after a while hoping we could work together and take turns on the front.Ā After several minutes I was wondering why this guy wasnāt pulling through to take his turn. I turned around to find he wasnāt there.Ā I guess Iām on my own.Ā It was going to be a war of attrition.Ā
As the miles ground on I heard riders coming up quickly behind me.Ā It was the lead pair from the 100 mile course.Ā They had already completed the extra 35 miles (with a 1 hour head start) and were now picking their way through the riders on the short course.Ā A couple minutes later a second pair passed me by as if I was standing still.Ā These guys were no schlubs.Ā One was a former pro in the European peloton.Ā He had just come back from Colombia where he won the Transcordilleras race.Ā Another was the Canadian time trial champion, identifiable because he was the only one wearing shorts that day.
The road returned to gravel at the Little Shasta Cemetery. I was feeling marked for death, but I wasnāt going to quit.Ā No way was the finish out of reach.Ā Starting up the biggest climb of the day the leaders in the womenās 100 mile race started to pass by.Ā āGood job.Ā Keep going,ā the first lady said (no not Dr. Jill).Ā I wanted to think she was talking to me while admiring my rear end, but in reality she was probably encouraging the guys in her group to keep the pace up in order to help her stay in the lead.Ā A couple months later she was murdered by a jealous woman for her part in a love triangle.Ā Youāve probably seen the story.Ā I think it even made the Links.Ā So who knows, maybe she really was admiring my butt.
The hill continued ever upward and against the wind.Ā In normal circumstances the climb would not have been that tough, but the headwind had worn me out. In hindsight, I also wasnāt eating and drinking enough so I was short on calories and water.Ā Itās hard to unwrap food while wearing long gloves, and when itās so cold itās easy to forget to drink.Ā Close to the top of the climb were a couple of short pitches with double digit grades.Ā Feeling like I was on deadly ground I had to get off and walk for a few yards.Ā Finally I dragged myself to the top where the first aid station awaited.Ā I grabbed some coke, some snacks and some electrolytes and rested a bit before setting off again. The good news was that this was the highest point in the race and we had gone more than half way.
The stop
After taking a leak (at least I couldnāt have been dehydrated) I got back on my bike.Ā The first bit was a really steep downhill section.Ā Not sure of the twisty road ahead I kept on the brakes (a pre-ride would have been helpful), but some guys just bombed right past me.Ā I donāt know how they do that especially through the turns.Ā Some people are just born to raise hell.
The steep descent gave way to a series of rolling hills as we made our way through the northern end of the course.Ā The sun started peaking out through the clouds, the temperature rose a little, and we got great views of the course ahead. The road was pretty rough at times.Ā I lost a water bottle on one of the downhills and had to ride back uphill a bit to recover it.Ā It didnāt matter though.Ā This is what I came for: the backroads, the expansive views, and the challenge.Ā
The view
We dropped down into the valley for the final push toward the finish.Ā Shortly before the course returned to pavement as I was making the last push into a headwind my wife called to see if I was there yet.Ā I had expected to finish by 3, but was running a little late.Ā I was about 6 miles from the finish, so I told her to finish her beer and head to the finish.Ā Back on pavement and with a nice tailwind it was a fast run to the finish.Ā I came in about 30 minutes later than I expected, but I wasnāt DFL.Ā The line for the taco truck at the finish was too long, so even though I had a meal ticket, I found my wife and headed back to the hotel for a shower and a meal.
All in all it was a good event and a learning experience.Ā I learned that I need to do a better job eating and drinking on these rides.Ā I got wider tires to smooth out some of the bumps, and I got stronger water bottle cages so I donāt lose any bottles.Ā I would do the event again.Ā I missed it this year, and it snowed again.Ā But maybe next year.Ā They canāt possibly have snow five years in a row.
I suppose I shall make a late first, and thank you for this article. I never rode seriously enough to do what you do. So I salute you!
I’m enjoying this series. I’m looking into old-fart city bikes so yeah, nothing like these efforts.
RJ showing that bitch ass fuck MikeS how it’s done, though I could do without the compliments aimed at someone who aren’t yourself. That really doesn’t jive with Firsting.
I love it when you dirty talk
Titty Tuesday after dark can only be appreciated at an appropriate Doppler shift.
https://archive.is/TfQf7/c3c1b5e1fe7eacb56cbd3260f663fdacf308c96c.jpg
NSFW.
https://archive.is/TZMcs/2b1b1a8d9ed83039efae8c79f077095049cd95b9.jpg
NSFW.
https://archive.is/b1KsB/0d570628bbee701503283a0563307acaa1e78cbc.jpg
NSFW.
https://archive.is/Qgk1F/c79c64c2895bddd1747e684a5233168799e47297.webp
NSFW.
https://archive.is/O1ZYt/c11566482b0d4c8e9aeb6a147d6bf0a2c0452428.jpg
NSFW.
Winner.
Page 3 girl, if Iām not mistaken
Iām not a big hooters kind of guy, but yowzaā¦
Avatar checks out, again.
Am I being detained?
No. I can’t catch you on a bike.
Well, I am not about to quit now.
No amount of alcohol is good for your heart, health experts say.
The evidence is clear, according to The Heart Foundation. Every drink counts, with any type or amount of alcohol increasing the risk of heart disease and conditions.
āNo matter where you are on the scale of alcohol consumption, less is better,ā its medical director Dr Gerry Devlin says.
The charity has updated its position statement to highlight the risks of alcohol, while asking Kiwis to evaluate their drinking habits and take steps to drink less. …
Alcohol was also found to be a leading risk factor for death and disease worldwide and was associated with nearly one in 10 deaths in people aged 15 to 49 years old, according to a 2018 study published in medical journal The Lancet.
It concluded there was no safe level of drinking, with any known health benefits outweighed by the adverse impact alcohol had on the body.
You cuntes can’t even make up your minds about eggs or steak, which are delicious and nutritious. Go fuck yourselves.
I must challenge that 1 in 10. Sounds like a poop statistic.
Poop statistics, I donāt think I took that course in college.
I think it’s only offered at SFSU.
^^^Congratulations, you have won one internet.
Itās mandatory now. You take it freshperson year with gender studies.
There is no safe level of ____________.
Lock yourself indoors. Better safe than sorry.
āFlatulence.ā
Better not lock yourself in!
Good advice
smoking.
I smoke a cigar once a year at deer camp. Because of this I am labelled a “smoker” in my doctor’s notes. I pay an extra $25 per year for my heath insurance, because I “smoke”. There is no in between, you are either a 2 pack a day smoker or you don’t smoke.
Meanwhile I’m inhaling smoke from Canadian forest fires and no one bats an eye.
The equating of vaping with smoking and its effect on my premiums was the first step on my journey of losing a lot of faith in the health care establishment.
Since I quit last month it occurs to me that I suppose I should claim the lower premium that comes with being one of the good one, but I don’t even know how that works. A doctor’s note? In that case, fuck that.
Oh, and the smoker penalty is LOT more than $25 a year for me. More like $25 a week.
One appointment ar Quitters Inc….
Why’d you admit that to your doctor?
Your doctor sounds like an asshole.
There’s some fine reporting. Start with “evidence is clear” wrt heart disease and other ‘conditions’ that will shorten your life. Nothing about absolute risk reduction, how statistically significant, no risk profile stratification – i.e. one might speculate that overall increase in risk is driven by the highest consumers, i.e. random drunken (chronic) asshole. Any increase in risk at lower levels of consumption may be so minor so as to be irrelevant (or worth the trade off to some). But we can’t have nuance.
Then switch to 15 to 49 year olds and ‘leading cause of death’. Guarantee that’s not heart disease, that’s vehicular deaths under the influence; not a lot of things kill 15-49 year olds, so any thing you choose to focus on will, by construction, be a ‘leading cause of death’.
So we have generalizations without detail followed by a bait and switch to deaths not due to the impact of alcohol on the bodies functions to leave the impression that if you drink any amount of alcohol, you’re bound for an early grave.
Perfect for sloppy scare mongering journalist looking for ‘clicks’, perfect for grifting ‘charity’ looking for grants and donations, not so useful for delivering useful information.
Sure you probably don’t want to ride a bike 65 miles through dirt, sand, wind and snow after a six pack and quo Huberman alcohol is a poison, but that’s not an excuse for this sort of propagandistic reporting.
It’s not even a leading factor in that group: “…was associated with nearly one in 10 deaths in people aged 15 to 49 years old.”
So yeah, drunk driving, drunk train track crossing, drunk falling down the stairs… Mendacious cunts.
It wouldn’t surprise me if that number was correct, mainly due to there not being a lot of deaths in that age group. People are mostly healthy, eat well, get normal amounts of excersise. But, habitual drinkers through the statistics off. Most of the people I know who died in that age range passed away from cancer, car crashes, suicide, and booze related shit.
But, that doesn’t mean society needs to quit drinking. 1 in 10 out of how many total deaths, vs. the total population of that age range. Shocking, I know!
These cuntes never acknowledge the death rate is 100%. Enjoy yourself and you die. Be a miserable ass who nobody wants around because you are constantly harping about diet, you die. One way you enjoy your brief moment of existence and the other you don’t. We are ~14,3ish years from the Big Bang and the death of the universe is (one respected hypothesis) 10 to the 10th to the 10th to the 56th years away. We don’t spend that much time alive, so we best enjoy it.
https://www.dailystar.co.uk/real-life/britains-most-tattooed-dad-3-30330114
“The tattoo fan estimates he has just 3% left of white space on his body with the remaining gaps left on his legs”
Unless he’s taken to calling it his third leg… ouch.
*barf*
Look, I have Mjolnir and Odins ravens and that is it. Enough for me. That is just someone who is insane
Every time I see weird shit like this I think of ancient civilizations where body mods were pretty normal.
But… in the here and now it’s just someone who has no fucks to give. Kind of my complete opposite. I’m the kid who did not mind being the nail pounded down.
Mental illness on public display.
They canāt possibly have snow five years in a row.
Climate change will fix that. There’s nothing it can’t do.
I’ve never done gravel: roadie for 40 years. In the last decade the hh100.org added an offroad; a good friend prefers it over the road course.
In my Texas rally days, a 1 hour head start would never work: the top guys are rolling a full 10MPH faster than the rest of us, and if you think an American interstate is a shitshow, just imagine the clowns wandering from ditch to ditch in an amateur century; mayhem would be automatic. Back to HH100, my favorite ride, folks self-segregrate with bad-asses going off the front and we’ll never see them again: four hours on the hottest day of the year in west Texas and they’re done and hitting the showers. The ride starts with a cannon shot (come and take it!); somewhere about 2,000 cyclists back, I’m straddling the top bar and having a chat: it will be at least five minutes before we begin to slow walk towards the start line, maybe seven before we even click in on one side; one year it took me 22 minutes to reach the start.
Dad (b 1940) needs a new ride. He makes maybe 50 miles a week pounding them out on some 50 pound monstrosity that he gave nothing for. I’d love to get him a real bike, save some weight, and get him some gears for the hills, but there’s no way I’m buying myself the drama: every time something went wrong or he forgot how to X, Y, or Z, it would be my problem to go fix/remind. Anyway, pounding away on that tank is good for him.
I want an electric bike for the hills.
Anyone have any experience in this area? I’m reading a lot of scare-media about the batteries blowing up.
Buying an e mountain bike changed my life. Opened up a whole world of mountain trails to me. Without Herr Bosch helping out these 75-year-old legs and the heart pumping beta blockers would be stuck cruising around town. Donāt know whatās with the fires. I havenāt burned down anything yet.ā
Some background… I currently live in NYC where the majority of the food delivery trade has moved to e-bikes in recent years and the wear and tear + cheap Chinese construction and let’s call it lackadaisical attention to charging has led to numerous fires and some deaths this year already.
Cue calls for banning.
I’m looking for an honest assessment of these things. The consensus seems to be that UL listed battery packs are safe but… Amazon doesn’t show that information. So, looking for recce’s if any, good brands, etc.
My wife has an ebike and loves it. It enables her to keep up with me on the flats, and she kicks my butt uphill. The battery is from Shimano, so I expect the quality to be higher than your average cheap Chinese battery.
That’s news I can use; thanks!
Fuck yeah.
Great article. I’m jealous of Segal’s ranch but happy I’m not a cyclist.
Regarding the dehydration and electrolytes, buy this:
https://drinklmnt.com/
Speaking of Seagal film allusions, how IN GOD’S NAME JaimeRoberto, did you miss Fire Down Below?
[If Q had dropped a redhead link this comment would’ve been in reply.]
He thinks he’s Above The Law.
LOL I remember that one from Beavis & Butthead. My buddy and I repeated it endlessly for awhile.
I skipped the chili the night before.
Am I supposed to believe Seagal has ridden a bike since he was a kid?
Not all he’s ridden:
https://nypost.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2021/12/kelly-lebrock-left-hollywood-06.jpg?quality=90&strip=all
Good Lord she used to be hot.
Things went really south.
Don escaped Texas on June 27, 2023 at 5:56 pm
where in KY ?
Hebron is where I would be
ah, the airport; in my Delta days, I was there all the time
BNA is about half way if you might ever lower yourself. I’m taking NewWife to see Dwight Yoakham and the Mavericks next month. Nashville is a lot like Memphis and Walmart this way: I feel smart and skinny there.
Greetings, Don!
I need to get back to Clarksville too….and Henderson
my son moved to Oregon….TX is such a weird place for me anymore
Yeah wife’s family is all over Kentucky. Hebron is an enigma. 6000 population with median income of 90k? Guessing everyone works across the river and lives there
Hebron TX is just 12 miles from Trashy.
Great write-up, JR. And congrats on doing this! Also; great job on all the Seagal movie references. I looked him up on IMDB and realized you had many more than I recognized.
I live on a farm that is, depending on which direction you leave, at least 3 miles from pavement. When I got back into biking, I was just occasionally riding the quiet gravel roads around me for the first month or so. Finally one day I rode three miles to the closest blacktop and got on it. I was shocked at how much easier it was to ride on a flat surface. I knew it would be easier, but I was taken aback at the difference. It felt like I got 50 pounds lighter.
LOL I’ve never ridden a bike a gravel. It sounds painful.
Generally we use wider tires at a lower pressure to smooth out the bumps somewhat.
Depends on how loose the gravel is. Packed gravel roads are a lot different from washed out washboarded gravel. Grew up on a long gravel driveway and the county road turned to gravel not too far beyond us.
You’re back to riding your bike?
Ummm…no. š I was riding the trainer this winter, then rode 75 miles over two days in Germany*, and nothing since late May.
*it was an eBike, but the altitude changes I made would have killed me on a regular bike.
I feel shame. I shall ride tomorrow if it isn’t raining.
I was going to make the sign of the GlibFit over you but now it will have to wait.
There’s a lot of variation in gravel. Some of it is so smooth and compact it’s like riding on a nice cement road. Some is sandy, and some is washboard which is hard as hell and demoralizing.
Yeah, the roads around me run that entire gamut.
Ugh, sandy is the worst.
Then again, I was a road weenie, so other than smooth pavement I am in hell.
I have an on topic question!
I just moved to the Rhineland-Pfalz. There is a ton of biking here. I used to road bike about a decade ago but got out of it after moving to WV and deciding roads were too narrow and drivers too unaccustomed to cyclists to feel safe.
Now that Iām here and Iām seeing paved bike paths everywhere and realizing how easy it will be to no-kidding run errands on a bike as well as go for exercise/recreational rides. Also eyeing some nice gravel/forest road ridesā¦
The question: what type of entry level bike should I get? Mountain bike? Hybrid? Commuter? Trekking?ā¦ā¦researching whatās out there and how many types of bikes they make is somewhat overwhelming. I know everything is a trade off and there is no one bike that will be awesome at everything. My guess is Iāll be doing 80% paved, 20% gravel.
Zee Germans have a wide range of bikes across all price points. I have seen some of their hybrids that will do what you ask. It won’t be as go go go as a pure road bike but will cover your requirements. A bonus is that you’ll be able to use in on light snow days, but buy the rain doohickeys for your tires.
I have found most German drivers better than US drivers- as long as you are following the rules. Never trust an eastern Euro truck driver though.
There are special bike maps that show an ungodly amount of small roads to drive on. It is a very rare spot in Germany that has even 1km between some type of road.
Thanks! Iāve been fiddling with the Komoot app for the last few daysā¦.does not appear I will ever run out of new rides to do. My brother is a cyclist and he is pushing hard for ājust put slick tires on a MTB, youāll regret a hybrid.ā But his thing is mountain biking so Iām wondering how much his biases are playing into it. Most Mountainbikes Iāve ridden feel slow (although admittedly they werenāt modified with asphalt in mind).
Rental or local bike shop? I’d kill for one of those Dutch bikes here.
Dutch bike?
https://www.reddit.com/r/bicycling412/comments/w245bz/comment/igomq0a/
Like a Japanese Mamachari.
For actual “getting somewhere” such as shopping and work I prefer bikes with internal hub gearing. Make sure the brakes still work well in the rain. Also prefer an upright seating position. You need to see all the traffic and be comfortable. See if you can rent a few different bikes and see what you enjoy during a week. Might be worth it.
I admire your gumption.
Well done!
On the plane ride from Seattle to Salt Lake City (prior to the leg to San Antonio) there was a guy openly, wetly sneezing with no attempt to cover his face. In First class!!
I thought, well if I get sick Iāll know why.
So here we are on day 4 of the conference. I started not feeling so great yesterday and had the sniffles, which I assumed were allergies.
NOPE. Woke up at 3:30 CDT with a splitting headache, sneezing up a storm, definitely a fever (though I donāt have a thermometer), and a cough that burns all the way down past my sternum. Ugh.
I am going to stay in the room and hope that I am ok to fly home Friday.
I hate business travel. Used to be so fun, but Iām too old and sick for this shit.
š·
That sucks.
Boo.
In First class!!
The hoi polloi needn’t adhere to the rules of civilized behavior.
š¤š¤§
Good morning! ā
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7Xf-Lesrkuc
š¶š¶
Probably one of the best songs you’ll hear all day. Be sure to read some of the comments. š¢
I saw a bumper sticker the other day – PUTIN LISTENS TO NICKELBACK.
Gah he really is evil.
Train is the Nickelback of groups that arenāt Nickelback.
Heh
How ’bout these guys? https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eQ_y-WQOU-Q
(Don’t know about the rest of their work, but I like this song.)
*whispers*
“It’s ok to like popular music”
LIEZ!
/hipster
Stinky gets it.
Good morning, Sean, zwak, rhy, Stinky, and ‘patzie!
Taking the day off work to take Little Black Cat in to get the stitches out of his butt, then I have a hair appointment.
šāāļø šāā¬ļø
A hair appointment for you or the cat?
For me. I’m just hoping I don’t get the two appointments mixed up and come home with a red cat and… š³
Growing up, we had a ginger tabby named Butterscotch. He was more orange than red though.
Mornin’, reprobates!
Morning, Glibs.
It’s always weird to wake up and find I turned off my alarm in my sleep. On the plus side, I appear to have slept through the night for once (it does happen from time to time)
Ouch, I used to do that in high school. I had to put the thing across the room.
Thankfully broke that. It is nice to have a clock on the nightstand that I can read without my glasses.
Good morning, U. Glad to hear you got a decent night’s sleep, and I hope you made it to work reasonably on time.
I didn’t. I was late connecting. If I hadn’t already arranged to be remote today to accept delivery of my AC, I’d be in serious trouble.
š
On the downside I agreed to be in the office tomorrow and friday.
Also, while the abdominal muscle doesn’t hurt as much, I’m worried about how trying to move a heavy AC unit is going to impact it.
Oof! Be careful! š
Mornin’, U. Sounds like losing the alarm may be the cure for your sleep woes. You’ll be able to stay awake for your meetings today; not sure that’s a good thing.
Let’s create a federal task force for every crime.
https://patch.com/new-jersey/ridgewood/26-catalytic-converters-taken-2-men-one-bergen-county-town-cops
āThis legislation requires the Attorney General and the Secretary of Transportation to establish a federal task force to crack down on catalytic converter theft in a holistic approach,” he said, “as this is a crime that spans multiple jurisdictions.”
Nothing left to cut.
In local news: https://bucks.crimewatchpa.com/da/29567/post/detectives-dismantle-ring-made-millions-catalytic-converter-thefts
Yay!
Requiring everyone drive around with an externally accessable part containing platinum always struck me as shortsighted.
We’ve had rebar cages welded around the cats on our work trucks. (After getting victimized several times.)
Tabbies?
I’m gonna ignore that and instead comment on how I saw a fox chasing a bunny in my development last night. Very exciting.
Who won?
They disappeared into the woods. I heard no bunny screams. *shrug*
Thank goodness! Bunny screams will, in fact, curdle your blood. ::shudders::
I hear wrapping them with springy razor wire is also a good option.