IFLA: The “Last Heatwave of the Year?” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of September 10

by | Sep 10, 2023 | IFLA | 161 comments

Gertie deals with the heat better than Lily


The heat and humidity makes the dogs sluggish, and the stars above seem that way because they don’t have a lot of input this week.  Overall, the week seems to be dedicated to love, with Venus being the pivot of both Earth-Moon and Sun-MERCURY RETROGRADE influences.  But that breaks up early in the week with nothing else until Friday where Venus’ place gets subsumed with Mars, so that’s pretty whiplash-y.  There is one rather profound sign on Thursday:  A conjunction of the new Moon and MERCURY RETROGRADE in Virgo.  There will probably not be a more auspicious time to begin something.

Kinda lackadaisical


Virgo: The Star – Loss, theft, privation, abandonment, hope and bright prospects.

Libra: Queen of Swords reversed – Malice, bigotry, artifice, prudery, bale, deceit.

Scorpio: Knight of Cups reversed – Trickery, artifice, subtlety, swindling, duplicity, fraud.

Sagittarius: 2 of Swords – Conformity, courage, friendship, concord in a state of arms, revenge.

Capricorn: Page of Coins reversed –  Prodigality, dissipation, liberality, luxury; unfavorable news.

Aquarius: The Chariot reversed –  Riot, quarrel, dispute, litigation, defeat.

Pisces: 5 of Swords – Inflicting loss while obtaining gain, winning against the odds.

Aries: King of Swords reversed – Cruelty, perversity, barbarity, perfidy, evil intention.

Taurus: Temperance – Economy, moderation, frugality, management, accommodation. 

Gemini: The High Priestess – Secrets, mystery, the future as yet unrevealed, silence, tenacity, mystery, wisdom, science.

Cancer: The Hanged Man – -Wisdom, circumspection, discernment, trials, sacrifice, intuition, divination, prophecy.

Leo: 5 of Wands reversed – Litigation, disputes, trickery, contradiction.

Eventually they just have to stop and pant at each otehr for a while.

Gratuitous youtube embed for KK:

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

161 Comments

  1. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: 2 of Swords โ€“ Conformity, courage, friendship, concord in a state of arms, revenge.

    Cold, on a platter?

  2. Not Adahn

    Paid my school taxes. Yay.

    • Fourscore

      School taxes really annoy me for 2 reasons. My kids have been out of school for 40 years but I’ve been paying every year.

      Secondly, in spite of the taxes the results always seem to change, but never in a positive direction.

      We “send kids to school” , a geographical place, rather than “getting an education”, the two seem to be different.

      • Sean

        I don’t even have any kids. >.>

      • Tundra

        I just read that 65 percent of fourth graders can’t really read.

        Great ROI on those taxes.

      • rhywun

        And 80 percent of them don’t know what “65 percent” means.

      • Sean

        Yeah, but they got their pronouns all sorted out and are up on anal sex tips.

      • Ted S.

        Just the tips?

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Well, you don’t want them to get shafted!

      • prolefeed

        You really shouldn’t expect a ROI after someone steals from you and spends it on what they want.

        At best they might decide it was in their best interest to disguise that it was theft by spending some portion of the loot on something that you assign a non-zero value to.

        At worst, they spend some on trying to actively seize your means of self-defense – see NM.

    • Rat on a train

      You pay a separate school tax?

      • creech

        In PA yes—school districts extort property tax.

      • Ted S.

        Ditto in NY; school districts outside the big cities aren’t contiguous with municipalities.

      • Mojeaux

        KC is a mess of municipalities, counties, and school districts.

      • Mojeaux

        And they all get taxes.

  3. MikeS

    Pisces: 5 of Swords โ€“ Inflicting loss while obtaining gain, winning against the odds.

    /cues up Eye Of The Tiger

  4. Sean

    “Cancer: The Hanged Man โ€“ -Wisdom, circumspection, discernment, trials, sacrifice, intuition, divination, prophecy.”

    I’m so getting laid this week.

    • Tres Cool

      I just did.
      Smell my finger.

  5. KK, Non-Man

    Ok, I need to know what the Simon Lebon picture in the media library was all about!

    • Not Adahn

      New Moon on Monday. Except it’s on Thursday.

      • KK, Non-Man

        Ha!! Nice!

  6. KK, Non-Man

    Cruelty, perversity, barbarity, perfidy, evil intention.

    Maybe Duran Duran will play “Careless Memories” on their set on Wednesday?

    I like the song…who’s the Virgo?

    • Not Adahn

      Virgo is now.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Well, no use to you, but I liked it. Guessed incorrectly that it was from Rio.

  7. Tundra

    Poor puppers. Kiki is a happy girl today, a cold front rolled in. Downright lovely this morning!

    Leo: 5 of Wands reversed โ€“ Litigation, disputes, trickery, contradiction.

    Not so lovely.

    • R.J.

      Iโ€™m going to pretend that horoscope didnโ€™t happen.

  8. Sean

    Busy day here. Got steaks, burgers, and pork chops to grill.

    • dbleagle

      Can’t really argue with it.

  9. Grummun

    Trickery, artifice, subtlety, swindling, duplicity, fraud.

    Is that me being tricky and duplicitous, or is the trickery and duplicity aimed at me?

    Two of our girls spent the night at a boarding kennel as a one night test drive, in preparation for a longer stay when we go on vacation later this month. The kennel sent pictures “see they made new friends all is well!” Except the Corgi’s ears are straight back in “I’m so scared my anal glands are dry heaving right now” posture. We go pick them up in half an hour. Hopefully the youngster is not too traumatized.

    • Don escaped Texas

      Iโ€™m so scared my anal glands are dry heaving right now

      Texas is coming! – Nick Saban

    • Grummun

      Dogs successfully redeemed. Boarding kennel reports both dog did very well, played with other dogs, etc. Corgi was wiped out when we got home, but after a nap she’s back to chewing on her sister’s ears and eviscerating chew toys.

  10. KK, Non-Man

    My favorite NFL player has been promoted from college hoofball commentary to NFL! Woot!

  11. rhywun

    The heat and humidity makes the dogs sluggish

    #metoo

  12. Suthenboy

    My Grandfather: (Re. Dogs) “If they can’t eat it or fuck it, they’ll piss on it.”

    I am in the yard breaking up some concrete. I chip away at it, take a break, then come back to it and chip some more. I leave the sledge on site so I dont have to keep fetching it each time. I just discovered the head of it with a big, fresh, runny serving of dogshit on it. Goddammit. Every swing gives me a fresh whiff. Thank you so much fido.

    • Tres Cool

      Since you’re in Louisiana, shouldn’t it be “Phideaux” ?

    • Sean

      Whelp, that’s unfortunate.

      • Shpip

        Sounds like his concrete-bustin’ session may be cur-tailed.

      • Sean

        His dog wants him to buy a jackhammer.

      • Shpip

        He can’t let the beast hound him into making an unnecessary purchase.

        Never negotiate with terrierists.

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Sometimes you have to in the lab of democracy.

  13. Mojeaux

    Taurus: Temperance โ€“ Economy, moderation, frugality, management, accommodation.

    Son coming home Thursday. Gonna need all the temperance I can muster.

    • Grosspatzer

      No coffee for you!

      • Mojeaux

        Jet Alert will do.

    • DEG

      Best wishes

  14. Rebel Scum

    Riot, quarrel, dispute, litigation, defeat

    Sounds about right. But I will not be defeated.

  15. Grosspatzer

    Secrets, mystery, the future as yet unrevealed, silence, tenacity, mystery, wisdom, science.

    Will no one rid me of this meddlesome stone?

  16. Mojeaux

    @Lack from dedthred:

    The janitorial thing is interesting because the marginal utility of the people in the congregation is probably a few times higher than your average janitor. So they may actually be shooting themselves in the foot there.

    The marginal utility of people who are already worn out from service and their lay clergy duties is even slimmer. When I say free labor, I don’t really mean about the janitorial labor. I mean all the people who staff things regular churches pay for (pastor, various ministers, deacons, Sunday school teachers, secretaries, musicians, etc.). All volunteer. The labor capital is vast, although likely calculable to the penny (which I’m sure the church has done). So for them to cheap out on janitors is just squeezing blood from a rock. They get it, but at what cost? That’s what makes me mad.

    • "RFK Apologist"

      It is not an accident that the endowment fund for the Church of Latter Day Saints causes a tizzy among journalists, but not a word is mentioned about the enormous endowment funds of secular non-profits that serve no one. The Mormons have an extensive welfare system that they employ to help people of natural disasters. The National Resources Council does no such thing, so the real question is why do these secular non-profits need any endowments? They’re not doing anything other than currying favor with politicians for their pet cause.

      I know moral bankruptcy is all the rage these days, but one institution help those in need and we’re supposed to be outraged that they are good stewards with their money?

    • prolefeed

      There’s a price to be paid for unquestioningly accepting whatever the Prophet says as true – 10% of your income, hundreds or even thousands of hours of uncompensated labor annually, restrictions on what you can do or say.

      One of the many things that made me walk away from the Church was naively volunteering to be a member of a crew to scrub the seats in the meeting house – and being the only person in the Elder’s Quorum to actually show up.

      • Mojeaux

        One of the many things that made me walk away from the Church was naively volunteering to be a member of a crew to scrub the seats in the meeting house โ€“ and being the only person in the Elderโ€™s Quorum to actually show up.

        That’s why the janitor thing bothers me so much. People are already stretched to give what they can. Why be an ass and try to get more?

    • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

      I am not a Mormon by any means, but as an outsider, I think this misses the point. The are called to serve as a reminder and test of their faith. Sure, the church could hire someone, but that is paying your way out of your duties to God.

      And relatedly, those people who did not show up for their duties are (and I am saying this as an unbeliver) failing in their relationship to God.

      • Mojeaux

        What I may have failed to get across is that these people are already doing many other things. Adding one more thing to the plate doesn’t help with keeping your labor pool healthy.

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        But wouldn’t that mean those people, unbeknownst to you, need more time to devoted to helping to do Gods work?

        What I am getting at is that maybe the seeming over work is really being parced out to people who either really do have the extra umph to take on these tasks, or to people who need to find room in what is possibly a messy life to do these things. Like I said, I am not a Mormon, so I don’t know what the take should be within your church.

  17. Gender Traitor

    Our dippy little Single A (but it’s HIGH A!) minor league baseball team ended their season with a come-from-behind win, which is what it took for them to get a winning record for the year. No playoffs yet again, but we would’ve had to miss them anyway.

    Bengals embarrassed by the Browns, so…congrats, Mr. Ilium, I guess. ๐Ÿ˜’

  18. Not Adahn

    Encountered a rabbit on the trail. After Lily returned from an unsuccessful chase, she was covered in a new (to me) specie of burr. The most difficult one so far to remove.

    • Tres Cool

      The Aaron Burr?
      Or the rare Deepwater Jฬถeฬถwฬถ Burr ?

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Deepwater? That event could be over his horizon.

  19. Sean

    Ice cream truck is outside. ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

    So very suburban.

    • rhywun

      We get them in the city, too (always have). ๐Ÿ˜›

      • MikeS

        I once saw a guy eat ice cream while driving a truck. ๐Ÿ˜ข

      • Tres Cool

        “Hey Margaret- looks like my grandfather eating ice cream.”

        /if you get that reference, HMU yo

      • Sean

        Dave’s not here.

      • MikeS

        Myyyyy sco-rotum!

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Isn’t that on the Wedding Album?

      • Sean

        ๐Ÿ˜‰

  20. Ted S.

    In Glibfit news, I completed the Catskills Fire Tower Challenge today and am thinking of doing a series of articles on the hikes to the five fire towers. But I could still use to get a few more pictures from a couple of the towers.

    • rhywun

      I’m a little alarmed that nobody is looking out for fires anymore.

      Or is there some newfangled way to do it now?

      • Tres Cool

        Drones. Operated by the union Forrest service employees in Albany.

      • Ted S.

        Apparently there are a lot fewer fires. I’d guess there’s radar or something to help detect fires too. Wikipedia also suggests that the general public is a lot more active in notifying the authorities of fires.

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Untruth! C-c-c-climat Ch-ch-change is c-c-c-coming to K-k-kill us!

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        (seriosly cool though, I would love to do those hikes.)

    • Tundra

      Nice work, Teds!

  21. creech

    Manhunt update
    Murderer loose on the wind outside the perimeter. Some idiot dairy farmer within the perimeter left his van unlocked with keys in it.

    • Tundra

      The illegal?

      • creech

        Yes. Murdered someone in Brazil. Got to U.S. via Puerto Rico
        . Then murdered his ex girlfriend.
        .

      • Tundra

        We might be fucked.

  22. Mojeaux

    Neph! I bet you’re a happy camper!!! Congrats!

  23. DEG

    Great dog videos.

    Litigation, disputes, trickery, contradiction.

    Sounds sufficiently shitty.

  24. Sean

    I got all my grilling done between the rainfalls. Yay.

  25. Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

    TFW Numrich has all the parts you need.

    TFW you look in your parts stash and realize that you have one of the things you ordered, and need something else.

  26. Tundra

    I’ve watched the most tennis this weekend than I have in 10 years.

    Good matches. I think it’s retarded that they pretend Russians aren’t. Makes me root for them.

    When did the game change back to serve and volley

    • rhywun

      LOL all of 2 matches?

      I vastly prefer the first week of the grand slams – so many matches all day.

      When did the game change back to serve and volley

      I dunno but most players are still not using it.

  27. Gustave Lytton

    If no one is going to pick up the Sunday noon, maybe push back IFLA and let the snark run late into brunch on the Sunday am links?

    • Mojeaux

      I’ve been asking for that for a while.

  28. Sean

    I need to clean out my freezer. ๐Ÿ˜’

    • rhywun

      #metoo cuz anything I don’t eat by next Sunday has to go in the trash.

      To that end I am eating some frozen chicken puff pastry things I found at the Halal market a few months ago.

      • Sean

        I’ve got pre-covid stuff that needs to go.

      • rhywun

        Grody.

      • Mojeaux

        At -10F, I’m not worried about it.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Did it two weeks ago. Tinge of regret at not using some of the items.

  29. Fourscore

    We have the freezer full of frozen tomatoes, amongst other things, basement fridge is loaded with cuke pickles. I’m bringing in 1 watermelon at a time, no room in the cold places. Garden is winding down, soon have to pick the cabbages (after HH) and take them to the garage fridge. No frost in the 10 day forecast but the days are cooling off, definitely fall.

    • Fourscore

      First year that I’ve had apples, not many but I picked them a couple days ago. They could have used a little more time but I’m really a novice, I’ll know more next year.
      I’ve been eating them in a salad.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I haven’t had a Waldorf salad in a while.

      • UnCivilServant

        What about Statler Salads?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Only in the mirror universe of Waldorf chicken.

      • Gender Traitor

        What variety of apples? My sister just made (and brought me!!) a BUNCH of homemade applesauce, now filling up the available space in two freezers. ๐Ÿ˜‹๐Ÿ She makes it like our mom used to, from the “Transparent” variety of cooking apple. She said the apples she bought were billed as Transparents, but she thought they were a bit big, so they might have been Lodis. She made ’em into delicious sauce, whatever they were!

  30. slumbrew

    I can add โ€œlight plumbingโ€ to my resume.

    Successfully replaced the bathroom sink (safety tip: heavy, metal soap dispensers should not be kept precariously near the edge of your sink).

    Helps that it was replaced just a couple years ago, so I could get the identical basin at Home Depot. I also now understand why plumbers hate pedestal sinks – had to do half of it by feel.

    • Gender Traitor

      Inquiring minds want to know why you had to replace it so soon. ๐Ÿคจ

      • Gender Traitor

        ๐Ÿ˜„

      • slumbrew

        The aforementioned soap dispenser left a good sized hole in the sink when it fell in one too many times.

      • slumbrew

        And, of course, the reason it was replaced last time was something else falling in and cracking it.

        Saved a few hundred bucks doing it myself this time.

      • UnCivilServant

        Why are you using heavy metal soap?

      • Gender Traitor

        To wash the bruises caused by headbanging?

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Because punk rock was too hard to sing?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        Hair metal kept clogging up the sink.

      • Gender Traitor

        ๐Ÿ˜ฃ I hope you replaced that, too!

      • UnCivilServant

        Zis ‘eavier Metal Soap will fix ze problem!

      • slumbrew

        That dwarf-star alloy soap dispenser I have my eye on should do it.

      • slumbrew

        Somehow replacing the dispenser is my job, despite me not buying it to begin with and repeatedly saying it was a bad choice for our small bathroom.
        Itโ€™s on my TODO list.

      • rhywun

        soap dispenser left a good sized hole in the sink

        I’m having a hard time picturing this thing that makes no bloody sense.

      • slumbrew

        Now picture that thing toppling into the sink and putting a hole in the china.

      • rhywun

        Glue it down, FFS.

      • slumbrew

        Throw it in the trash and get a small, plastic one, you say?

        Will do!

      • rhywun

        lol holy shit

  31. Brochettaward

    I’m always amazed at Mike Tomlin’s ability to draft morons. It’s his trademark. All these analysts fawn over George Pickens because he makes the occasional highlight reel play. He could be this or he could be that. The guy isn’t ever going to be shit in the Matt Canada offense, and he’s far more likely to self-destruct on the team. Guy storms out of the locker room with no comment after week 1 in his second year.

    At least with Antonio Brown, the team managed to keep his bullshit quiet for most of his career.

    • Brochettaward

      Also, just fuck mediocre Mike Tomlin in general. The guy’s resume over the last decade is on par with Marvin Lewis’s.

  32. Beau Knott

    Good morning!
    Changing things up today with a Minneapolis band, Brother Sun, Sister Moon. The Great Game, their only album, was released in 1997. I was introduced to them in 99, after they were already history.
    The style is allegedly trip-hop, but you couldn’t prove it by me.
    Cairo.
    Bangkok.
    I love the line “Helps to redefine your sense of sin, when you’re standing by as tanks roll in”

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, Beau, Sean, U, and NA!

      • Gender Traitor

        I hope you don’t find too much of a mess made during your time off.

    • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

      Definately Tip-hop, nice though. I kinda burned myself out on the genre with a rather constant Portishead repeat, but always fun to go back and find more stuff.

    • UnCivilServant

      ๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค

    • Gender Traitor

      Is this band’s name pronounced “liv” or “lyve”?

  33. UnCivilServant

    Vacation’s over.

    I gotta go back to work today.

    • UnCivilServant

      Worse, it’s an office day.

      I’ll see everyone after the commute.

  34. Not Adahn

    So much activity so early in the morning.

    • Gender Traitor

      This is what we do.

  35. Gender Traitor

    Poor little piggy! Now he’ll never achieve his full potential as yummy, yummy bacon! ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿท๐Ÿฅ“

    • Gender Traitor

      My mistake – I misgendered her! ***SIGH!!!*** Now I’m going to be cancelled. ๐Ÿ˜ณ

    • UnCivilServant

      the piglet, which they named Pearl Pancetta

      (-.-)

    • Tres Cool

      TOO LOCAL!

  36. Grosspatzer

    Mornin’ , reprobates!

    • R.J.

      Morning, are you out and home? Feeling better?

      • Grosspatzer

        Thanks. Back, proud owner of a stent. I imagine this is what it feels like to be an old man with prostate issues. Will chat with surgeon later today to discuss the next attempt to deal with the stone.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, ‘patzie! Hope you’re as comfortable as possible under the circumstances. (Good drugs?)

      • Grosspatzer

        Aside from amoxycillin, no drugs. I’m not really in pain, just very uncomfortable. At least I can’t watch local TV since both cable boxes got fried Friday. I don’t need to see the rah-rah ‘Murica bullshit that dominates the airwaves today. A good drinking game would be turning on the news and taking a drink every time they say “Freedom!!!”

      • R.J.

        Shocking but true. It was all about the Danny boy rape trial and the tearful withdrawal of character letters by Mila and whatโ€™s his face. And other rapes/cheaters. Only one small segment on 911. Thankfully my daughter woke up and I had an excuse to put on cartoons. I donโ€™t know how my wife watches that news crap. Itโ€™s pure poison.

      • Grosspatzer

        That’s surprising. Maybe they’re hesitant to show footage of Giuliani as something other than a cartoon villain.

      • Grosspatzer

        How are the cartoons these days?

      • R.J.

        Good. MeTV has an excellent morning cartoon show of classics.

  37. R.J.

    Morning. Woke up, wife was watching ABC news. I can say that network news is still wretched and endlessly repetitive.

    • Gender Traitor

      And you just know what’s going to be all over the mainstream news today. I will say that on this day 22 years ago, ABC was the only network news I could stand to watch – Dan Rather was too emotional, I don’t remember what was wrong with Tom Brokaw (maybe unintelligible?), but Peter Jennings was a welcome oasis of calm. After all, he was Canadian, so what the hell did he care?

      • Not Adahn

        And you just know whatโ€™s going to be all over the mainstream news today.

        Trump is about to take away the democracy that we saved on 9/11?

  38. Not Adahn

    NPR had a story about the tragedy of 9/11 – the US sponsored coup of Allende.

    • Grosspatzer

      Of course they did.

  39. UnCivilServant

    Last year when I took three weeks off to go to the Honey Harvest, I recieved 9,000 emails over that vacation.

    This year in the new job on my one week off, I got… 500 emails, half of which are automated messages from the old job which haven’t been fixed, and another quarter are automated messages from the new job that have a short shelf life. ~125 work emails for a week seems light. I only have to answer about a half dozen of them.

    • Grosspatzer

      Damn. Things are looking up!

      • UnCivilServant

        I didn’t even have to spend days sifting through the messages.

      • Grosspatzer

        That sucks, sifting through thousands of messages is a great way to avoid work.

  40. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody