IFLA: The “Welcome Virgo!” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of September 3

by | Sep 3, 2023 | IFLA | 40 comments

Lily, Angel and Peanut. Sometimes Peanut pushes things too far.


Greetings!

A busy week in the skies, let’s look at it.  The week starts off with a bang with an alignment of MERCURY RETROGRADE and Saturn retrograde which because of the dual natures of both of those planets could be really good or really really bad.  Either way, it’s really something so be prepared to seize the opportunity or dive for cover, depending.  Wednesday is a prime time for some adult play — not only does Venus return to direct motion, but the moon in Gemini suggests that if you’ve got that roleplaying scenario you’ve been hesitant about suggesting, that’s a good day to try it.  However, the next day, things start unravelling at home (there is no indication that the night before has anything to do with this, btw).    First the moon crosses between the Earth and Jupiter, and then Jupiter also goes retrograde.  This is actually an interesting demonstration of long-term effects:  For a long time Jupiter in Taurus has been rewarding hard work, determination and grinding out results; starting on Saturday we’ll see a lot more wasted effort and pain for no gain.

So many reversed cards this week…

Virgo: Temperance reversed – Don’t be boring.

Libra: Strength – Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of they wimen.

Scorpio: 3 of Cups reversed – The side effects of excess/overindulgement, etc. A hangover cure or visit to a clinc may be in order. Possible a call to your insurance agent.

Sagittarius: The Star reversed – When you wish upon a star, sometimes that star is being a bitch and decides to screw you over in a particularly personal way that you’ve just told it about by wishing upon it.

Capricorn: Justice reversed – Legal complications, bigotry, bias, excessive severity.

Aquarius: King of Coins reversed – Rich dude out to fuck you over.

Pisces: Ace of Wands reversed – Fall, decadence, ruin, perdition.

Aries: The Blank Card – I can’t tell if it’s reversed, but probably it is this week.

Taurus: Ace of Coins reversed – This is about how money can fuck you over. Like the King of Coins reverse above, but less about a specific individual and more about economic systems in general. Also potentially, being crushed by a pallet of cash.

Gemini: Judgement reversed – Weakness, failure, being found unworthy.

Leo: 5 of Cups – Loss, but something remains. A situation in which there is a loss that is less bad than it seems, or a gain involving a different kind of loss (inheritance, lawsuit settlement, etc).

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

40 Comments

  1. Beau Knott

    Cancer must have been especially grim.

    • Sean

      Yeah, WTF?

      • Don escaped Texas

        they hate me – Mitch McConnell

      • Not Adahn

        MERCURY RETROGRADE.

  2. Tundra

    Who’s the brindle in the second and third video? She’s got moves!

    Leo: 5 of Cups – Loss, but something remains. A situation in which there is a loss that is less bad than it seems, or a gain involving a different kind of loss (inheritance, lawsuit settlement, etc).

    Huh.

    • Not Adahn

      That’s Daisy.

  3. Mojeaux

    Taurus: This is about how money can fuck you over. Like the King of Coins reverse above, but less about a specific individual and more about economic systems in general. Also potentially, being crushed by a pallet of cash.

    Um …

    So, yeah, my state tax return is way more than it should be, knowing the nature of my past state returns. However, the state also has a surplus and I believe I thought they said they were giving some of it back. However, I’m suspicious because I forgot a 1099 of some substance. So I’m afraid that return is going to fail (“Thank you for playing; try again next time.”) or if I’m going to get it and then get nailed with an audit, which would be highly inconvenient.

    Like, why did Taurus get this big-ass reading?

    Then again, nothing bad happened with last week’s shitty reading, so maybe there’s hope.

    • Fourscore

      I sort of went through that years ago, after a CPA screwed up my return. I owed an extra 800 and paid up. About 3 years ago I grossly overpaid (my mistake but I caught it right away) I filed an amended return and got 2 super checks from 2 different offices. Anyway I am enjoying the high life and I believe the IRS is so screwed up they’ll never be able to find the errors.

      Not to worry, Moj, if they find your error they’ll send you a bill. My wife said it’s their problem, not ours. (When one underpays)

      • Mojeaux

        Thanks, Fourscore. If it were the IRS, I wouldn’t worry. It’s the state I’m worried about since they keep a closer track and they are eager to go after you. I plan to file an amended return just as soon as I get that money.

      • Fourscore

        Oh yeah, I dropped the CPA, figured I could make my own mistakes. Turbo is my friend but my taxes are fairly simple compared to others. Only changes are the numbers.

      • Mojeaux

        TurboTax has failed to ask me a few cogent, but irregular questions here and there that ended up saving me A LOT of money, but I caught them.

        I started my tax journey with two accountants. Both of them handed me a $2,000 tax bill. The problem was that the second one immediately electronically filed it. I was bitching to my aunt who said, “Wait. They didn’t ask you this, this, this?” “No.” “Well, you have your own business now, so you need to deduct that, that, and that. File an amended return.” This was in 2003 or 2004.

        I went and got a paper booklet and a 1040C and I went through it line by line, receipt by receipt. I filed an amended return. The IRS forgave me the 41¢ I missed. It wasn’t long before I started using TurboTax. I realized that I would still have to do the work of gathering the numbers, so what good was an accountant?

    • creech

      If you send me a $2,000 visa gift card I can call off the sheriffs who are coming Tuesday morning to arrest you for not paying your taxes. Don’t hang up or I’ll have your grandson call about that DUI he got arrested for in Tijuana last night.

      • Mojeaux

        Fake news. I don’t have grandkids and with any luck, I never will.

      • The Gunslinger

        FYI, Granddaughters are pretty awesome.

  4. MikeS

    Pisces: Ace of Wands reversed – Fall, decadence, ruin, perdition.

    Sounds like fun

  5. juris imprudent

    The Blank Card is okay as long as it is dry.

    • MikeS

      When were you planning on leaving? Will you be able to or is your stay being extended?

      • juris imprudent

        Tuesday, and we might make that, but Weds is more likely. As long as there isn’t more rain which is not forecast.

  6. DEG

    Nice dog videos.

    Loss, but something remains. A situation in which there is a loss that is less bad than it seems, or a gain involving a different kind of loss (inheritance, lawsuit settlement, etc).

    Hmm…. somewhat sufficiently shitty.

  7. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: The Star reversed – When you wish upon a star, sometimes that star is being a bitch and decides to screw you over in a particularly personal way that you’ve just told it about by wishing upon it.

    Maybe I’ll take my chances

  8. The Late P Brooks

    Top Mwn will save us

    Asked how he would help residents finance new homes, Thompson said Sramek told him he planned to use “all of his knowledge as a finance guy” to generate savings. Development in California is convoluted, but Thompson said Sramek told him they’re hoping for expedited permitting “because their project is so good and their intentions are so great.”

    Stop it. You’re killing me.

    • juris imprudent

      True proggie cant – intentions are everything.

    • rhywun

      It will never get off the ground without every Dem-voting special interest group getting its cut.

  9. Don escaped Texas

    Gemini: Judgement reversed – Weakness, failure, being found unworthy

    we’re cleared for landing? cool – Yevgeny Prigozhin

    • Don escaped Texas

      Pisces: Ace of Wands reversed – Fall, decadence, ruin, perdition

      anyone smell smoke? – Richard Bissen

  10. Sean

    Chipotle is bringing back their commercials with mask wearing.

    NO.

    • MikeS

      They’re for keeping the Chipotle out of your mouth.

    • Tundra

      I rarely go there but fuck them. No more.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I wonder how many companies are going to Bud Light themselves by pushing the renewed Covid hysteria. How out of touch can you be?

    • creech

      Was dragged to the Wyeth art museum this morning. Six or seven art loving men (all without companions it appeared) were wearing masks. I felt like saying but didn’t, “why the fuck are you out in public if you are highly contagious?’

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Wagons were circled

    The study, from respected British database Cochrane, claims that masking “probably makes little or no difference.” It went viral in anti-mask and COVID-skeptic communities this spring, but has been called out as misleading by fact checkers.

    Disinformation!

    • MikeS

      …but has been called out as misleading by fact checkers church propogandists.

      • Suthenboy

        Vaccines dont work. Masks dont work. Lockdowns made no difference.
        After the dust settled and the numbers were run that is what the numbers showed. We already knew that masks dont work, we have for 100+ years.
        The vaccines were so squirrley words hardly describe it. I thought maybe the lockdowns? The trouble I had was that the info given us about the cooties themselves was as questionable as the counter measures.

        Now they are reversing everything we know to be true and taking another run at the same measures. My answer was NO last time and it is NO this time.
        I would like to know where all of the labs are that are producing these ‘variants’.

  12. Evan from Evansville

    “This is about how money can fuck you over…”

    I’m taking another shot at work. If I move a bit wrong I’ll be in a lot of pain, but it’s manageable and I can avoid it.

    Think today to have to tell Kroger that tho I look fine, I’m pretty fucking handicapped, newly fractured femur aside.

    That should be interesting. Not exactly sure how to play it. I think most people would think I’m yankin’ their chain.

    Humdinger, that.

    But work makes the day go by so much faster. Only 2.75 hours left. I can use those $45.

    Let’s-a-goooo!!

    • R.J.

      Forty-five DOLLAH
      Make you HOLLA
      That’s how it go
      When you are BLUE COLLA
      Stacking those VEGGIES
      The pay is STEADY

      That’s all I got. Brooks? Anyone?

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Fractured femur?!

      • Tres Cool

        Album name, or garage punk band ?

  13. Rebel Scum

    Rich dude out to fuck you over.

    Not sure what to make of this.