License to Kill I

by | Sep 11, 2023 | Fiction | 157 comments

A Glibertarians Exclusive: License to Kill, Part I

Paul O’Doull lay on the muddy ground, looking through the sights of his Springfield. The rifle was one of the new ones, an ‘03A3 with an aperture sight instead of the old barrel-mounted sight of the ’03. The floorplate felt cheap to Paul, stamped metal instead of milled steel, but the rifle worked, and it was familiar enough.

He and his trench-mate, Private First Class Henry Houlihan, were both in position, with other Marines to their right and left. All had weapons up, loaded and aimed. The attack would come in to their front, and the attackers would have to cross a low ridge, when they would be sky-lined for a moment.

That was when the Marines planned to open fire.

Paul checked the Springfield’s safety – off.  He checked the magazine cut-off – off. He checked the load in the chamber for the tenth time. He was ready to go. He looked up and down the line once. Everyone was prone, rifles aimed at the ridge.

The Marines were ready.

 ***

 Honolulu, March 1946

“Who was that?” Maggie asked.

Paul O’Doull closed the door of the manager’s apartment of the little Ala Wai building he and his wife owned. “Remember Sally Neal? Navy nurse, rented an apartment from us before the war.”

Maggie looked thoughtful.  “Little gal? Red hair?”

“That was her. With the war over, she is spending some leave time looking up old friends. Guess she lives in Frisco now. She married that Navy officer that was sparking her before Pearl Harbor. He was killed on the Indianapolis.

“That’s too bad.  Too many young men killed in that damn war.”

Paul tapped his leg; it made a noise more like furniture than flesh. “Tell me about it.  Only luck that it wasn’t me in the first one. That was bad enough.”

Paul planted himself on the cheap couch that sat in the living room. Maggie came out of the kitchen and sat beside him. She patted his wooden leg.

“You’re doing well enough. Losing your leg hasn’t stopped you from more important things.” She winked. “Are you going out to meet your friends tonight? It’s Wednesday.”

“Planned on it.” Paul generally spent Wednesday evenings playing poker with a group of old Marines at a nearby watering hole called Mahalo; three of the usual attendees were, like Paul, veterans of Belleau Wood.  That number included, to Paul’s delight, his old trench-mate Henry Houlihan, who Paul had thought dead. Henry had taken a bullet through the upper chest, but miraculously the bullet had not done lethal damage. Henry had returned home little the worse for wear and had later made the journey to Hawaii, found the weather and scenery to his liking, married a Hawaiian girl and stayed.

“Is Apikala coming along with Henry?”

“You could call and ask.”

“I will. We can have a few drinks while you men play cards.” Henry’s wife and Maggie had hit it off on their first meeting and were now great friends.

Later, after a light supper, the couple walked the six blocks to the Hawaiian bar, Paul leaning heavily on his cane and stumping along; his weight had gone up some over the last ten years, but he still managed with the one cane and the old, original wooden leg.  He still had the odd, rolling gate, swinging the prosthetic leg forward with each step so the steel knee joint locked to take his weight, but after almost thirty years he was used to it.

Three of Paul’s poker buddies were already seated at a round table in the middle of the room, cards, chips and mugs of cold beer in front of them. Henry Houlihan was there, as was his wife Apikala; she and Maggie went off to a small table near the window for some girl time while Paul waved for a beer and sat down with the men.

“Deal me in, boys,” he said.  He looked over at one of the younger men, still on active duty, a veteran of Okinawa, Dugan Jefferson. “What’s eating you, Dugan?  You look like you could eat rocks.”

“Fuckin’ asshole on the radio on the way in here,” Dugan grumped. “Whining on and on about the atom bomb, how we dropped them on all those poor Japs.  If Truman hadn’t dropped those bombs, they woulda sent us into a meat grinder.  Told Sam here, ‘you think Iwo Jima was bad? You think Okinawa was bad?  Wouldn’t be nothing next to invading Japan.”

Sam Kendall, a returned Navy CPO, grinned. “He’s been going on about it for about the last half-hour, Paul.  Maybe we can change the subject now you’re here.  Tell him about Belleau Wood again.”

“Heard your damn Belleau Wood story only about fifty times now.”  Dugan, still scowling, took a long pull at his beer.

“Well, I’ll tell you one good thing about Belleau Wood,” Paul said.

“What’s that?”

“No atom bombs.”

“Yeah, that would have sucked.  Imagine if the Krauts woulda got one this last go-round?”

“What’s it matter to you?” Paul joshed Sam good-naturedly.  “Fuckin’ squids would be all out on the water, all away from it when it goes off.”

Dugan started dealing cards. “Come on, you assholes,” he said. “We gonna play cards or talk all night?”

Paul lit a cigarette, then picked up the five cards he had been dealt.  None of them seemed to have any relationship to any of the others.

“Gonna be one of those nights,” he muttered.  His old friend Henry looked over at him and grinned.

The evening went on. The four old servicemen played cards and drank beer.  Maggie sat at the window-side table with Apikala, sipping a gin and tonic while Apikala drank iced tea.  Outside, night was falling, and traffic on the sidewalk was picking up.

“Henry says he wants Paul to go shooting with him Sunday,” Apikala said.  “With those old Army rifles he bought when the war ended.”

“You’d think they both would have had enough of that,” Maggie said with a smile. “Boys and their toys, I guess.”

“You were here in 1941.  You remember how it was.  We all thought the Japs would invade.  Everybody that had guns was keeping them loaded.  Oh, the Navy said no, you can’t keep guns, but you know everyone did.”

“We did,” Maggie said, thinking of a little .32 pocket pistol Paul had bought in 1936; after the incident in Iowa, Paul felt the need to keep what he referred to as “a little helper.”

Outside, three young men walked past the Mahalo, bound for a larger, noisier bar down the street.  The three had the obvious look of tourists, with garish clothing and loud voices, and the three were more than a little drunk.

One of them stopped suddenly outside the window.  That redheaded broad in there, he thought to himself.  I think that’s…

He took a closer look and nodded.  Sure as hell, that’s Aunt Maggie.

Then, not wanting to draw Maggie’s attention, he hurried after his friends.  “Have to tell Uncle Micah about this,” he muttered.

***

Man thinks ’cause he rules the earth he can do with it as he please,

And if things don’t change soon, he will.

Oh, man has invented his doom,

First step was touching the moon.

 

Now, there’s a woman on my block,

She just sit there as the night grows still

She say who gonna take away his license to kill?

About The Author

Animal

Animal

Semi-notorious local political gadfly and general pain in the ass. I’m firmly convinced that the Earth and all its inhabitants were placed here for my personal amusement and entertainment, and I comport myself accordingly. Vote Animal/STEVE SMITH 2024!

157 Comments

  1. MikeS

    That nephew is a little prick.

    • SDF-7

      He definitely looks to be a candidate for a fishing trip on Lake Tahoe, yeah.

      • Not Adahn

        Surely they’re not still wanting to marry her off.

      • SDF-7

        At this point I expect it is more “She is ours, and we don’t let what it ours get away from us!”

      • SDF-7

        “what itis”. Geez louise you’d think I’d proof a comment before I hit “post” someday.

    • Animal

      Oh, just wait.

    • Brochettaward

      Not as much of a prick as someone who impersonates a Firster.

  2. SDF-7

    Oh for Pete’s sake… every time she thinks she’s out — they pull her back in….

    Thanks as usual, Animal!

    • WTF

      Pulled me right in, too.
      Nice start, thanks, Animal!

  3. Sean

    🙂

  4. WTF

    I’m not sure uncle Micah really wants to take on a group of combat veterans with rifles on their home turf.

  5. Grosspatzer

    Here we go. I hope you’ve arranged a painful death for that little snitch. Bullet to the head is too good for the likes of him.

  6. DEG

    veterans of Belleau Wood

    And he had a 03A3?

    • Animal

      Just wait. All will be revealed.

  7. DEG

    Tying a bunch of story lines together? I like it.

  8. ron73440

    He took a closer look and nodded. Sure as hell, that’s Aunt Maggie.

    Then, not wanting to draw Maggie’s attention, he hurried after his friends. “Have to tell Uncle Micah about this,” he muttered.

    CWAA

    Thanks Animal, it took a minute to remember who everyone was and the tie ins to your other stories.

    Should be interesting to see how they deal with this.

  9. SDF-7

    Too bad CVL-24 apparently did her last Magic Carpet run in January of ’46, I was hoping for a showdown between the Irish Mob-wannabes and the vets in her shadow at the dockyard or something for irony. (Or if Paul or Henry bought it there…. they always knew that’s “where it would happen”).

    Of course, this is part of the reason I’m not a writer… I naturally want to do corny crap like that which is probably making Animal shake his grizzly jowls in dismay about now.

  10. Tundra

    Excellent, Animal.

  11. Rebel Scum

    This bitch said what?

    But New Mexico Gov. Michelle Lujan Grisham is defending her order, claiming it was necessary to protect “public health,” and besides, her oath to uphold the Constitution was not “absolute.”

    “No constitutional right, in my view, including my oath, is intended to be absolute,” she retorted after being asked whether her order violated her oath of office to “uphold the Constitution.” …

    “I have emergency powers,” she said. “Gun violence is an epidemic. Therefore, it’s an emergency.”

    That’s some mighty fine logic-ing there.

    • Not Adahn

      “You honor, my oath to tell the truth is not absolute.”

      • Sean

        Let us know how that works out for you.

      • UnCivilServant

        If it’s a New York Judge, you can probably make installment payments on your bribe.

    • Brochettaward

      Referring to the constitution is a racist dog whistle at best to the left.

    • MikeS

      “Wait, what?”

      /her husband

    • creech

      You know what’s an emergency? The number of pols willing to use the constitution as toilet paper.

  12. Ownbestenemy

    Thanks Animal. Now I have to go back and refresh my memory of pervious stories.

    • Sean

      pervious stories.

      I think that’s more SF’s genre.

  13. Rebel Scum

    Who wants to tell them?

    If it excludes trans women, it is not feminism!!!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Should turn out to be a shitshow, I’ll bring the popcorn.

      • R.J.

        Oh this should be grand. I’ll save us some seats if you bring the popcorn.
        Also thank you Animal! Another great story!

    • Robonerfherder

      One one hand, this shit is annoying.

      On the other, they’re destroying themselves and the rest of their movement. To which I say “good, keep it up”

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      Dicks out for feminism!

      • SDF-7

        Her-ambe?

  14. Dr. Fronkensteen

    OT: Beautiful day yesterday here. I went kayaking. Saw a woman on the shore fishing, alone. She was wearing a mask.

    • Brochettaward

      Would?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        Couldn’t tell. I was at least 40 yards away.

      • Ted S.

        So you were social distancing too.

        I have to say it was nice to be on a mountain all by myself for close to three hours yesterday. It was only when I got back down to the trailhead that another car pulled in to hike up the mountain.

      • DrOtto

        The mask puts her over the line on the hot/crazy matrix.

    • Grosspatzer

      Beautiful day yesterday here. I went kayaking. Saw a woman on the shore fishing, alone.

      Ooh, this is promising!

      She was wearing a mask.

      Damn. Just when I was getting a “Dear Penthouse” vibe. I guess she’s not into paddling?

      • Grosspatzer

        And this is why it’s called “hanky-panky”?

    • Robonerfherder

      Went to church yesterday. Multiple mask wearers, including a flabby soyboy in his twenties.

      SAD

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      Went for a bike ride yesterday and passed a couple of hikers who were masking and maintaining a safe distance from each other. In her native tongue I said to my wife “Found the idiots.”

      • Tundra

        We were up over 12K on Saturday. No masks up that high!

  15. MikeS

    Minnesoda Nice

    Hubbard County woman arrested after allegedly shooting son with BB gun

    The investigation showed that the boy and his brother had been wrestling, which caused one of the boys to get a bloody nose. As punishment, their mother, 31-year-old Katherin Rose Ewald-Conner, of rural Becida, told the 9-year-old son that he could allow his brother to punch him or that she would shoot him with a BB gun, the release said.

    Ewald-Conner shot her son in the leg while he was attempting to run away from her, the release said. The child climbed on top of the roof of their house in an attempt to get away from his mother; Ewald-Conner climbed onto the roof and shot her son in the forehead with the BB gun.

    • Sean

      That’s just solid parenting.

      • UnCivilServant

        She could have shot his eye out. You want to teach a lession, not maim.

        And besides, the threat was only one shot. After the leg hit, there was no excuse to keep shooting. You have to keep your word.

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Saw a woman on the shore fishing, alone. She was wearing a mask.

    And nothing else?

  17. The Late P Brooks

    Ewald-Conner climbed onto the roof and shot her son in the forehead with the BB gun.

    I think I’m smitten.

    *need pics

  18. UnCivilServant

    OT – A carryover from the morning Links.

    I ran into another article on the Portugese wine flood. It called the vat site a Winery, but named the company as “Destilaria Levira” which Would translate to Levira Distillery (Levira being the town that got flooded).

    It did mention a governmnet program to dispose of a glut of wine produced this year, but the link is in Portugese, where the excess was being stored in

    I don’t know if the company is a winery, a distillery, or both, as alcohol-related links get blocked from the office.

    • UnCivilServant

      *being stored in large, presumably new and shoddy vats

      Should have proofed before hitting post.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      A glut of wine? I blame climate change.

      • UnCivilServant

        We’re doing alcohol-related floods, not fires.

      • Nephilium

        *clears throat*

        People drank from the 6 inches (150 mm) deep river of whiskey that is said to have flowed as far as the Coombe. None of the fatalities suffered during the fire were due to smoke inhalation, burns, or any other form of direct contact with the fire itself; all of them were attributed to alcohol poisoning from drinking the undiluted whiskey that had been stored in casks; this alcohol was much more potent than whiskey offered at retail in bottles.

      • UnCivilServant

        You expect me to actually read a linked article?

      • R.J.

        Oh, you’d be right there with a bucket. You’d be smart enough not to drink a bunch, but you’d have a tidy bucketful.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    Pass.

    And how.

  20. Rebel Scum

    Grapeshot would be more effective.

    Commotion in the Netherlands this weekend as Extinction Rebellion activists are blocking traffic in The Hague. Police are using water cannons on the activists.

    Last night Extinction Rebellion also locked to A12 highway before being detained by the police.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    “I have emergency powers,” she said. “Gun violence is an epidemic. Therefore, it’s an emergency.”

    Fuck you and the broom you rode in on.

    • The Other Kevin

      The rights enumerated in the Constitution, which are protected from the government, can be infringed whenever the government feels like it. That checks out.

  22. Sensei

    But of course…

    Her advance team realized there weren’t going to be enough plugs to go around. One of the station’s four chargers was broken, and others were occupied. So an Energy Department staffer tried parking a nonelectric vehicle by one of those working chargers to reserve a spot for the approaching secretary of energy.

    https://www.npr.org/2023/09/10/1187224861/electric-vehicles-evs-cars-chargers-charging-energy-secretary-jennifer-granholm

    Bonus:
    Granholm approaches a charging station to charge the Cadillac Lyriq she was riding during a four-day road trip through the southeast early this summer. The electric vehicle had charging problems due to an “isolated hardware issue,” Cadillac says. But Granholm’s team encountered plenty of not-so-isolated problems too.

    • Timeloose

      An isolated hardware issue could mean a lot of things when referring to electric cars. Was her expectations of the EV grounded in reality of biased about the hardware’s capabilities?

      • Sensei

        It means like roughly 20% plus of the time for other non-Tesla EVs at non-Tesla chargers she couldn’t charge at DC fast charger.

        This usually results in finger pointing between the 3rd party charger owner mostly likely shitty Electrify America and in this case GM. In this case it appears GM is actually confessing that it’s vehicle was the problem.

        https://www.jdpower.com/business/press-releases/2023-us-electric-vehicle-experience-evx-public-charging-study

      • Grosspatzer

        “grounded in reality”

        Doubtful. Sounds like she was shocked at the problems.

      • The Other Kevin

        This is why EV’s are encountering resistance.

      • ron73440

        That sounds like a current problem.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Ohm my god, would you stop with the corny jokes already?

      • SDF-7

        Watt, do the jokes re-volt you?

      • UnCivilServant

        No, he wants to spark creativity.

    • ron73440

      Biden has many bad appointees, but I think she might be the worst one.

      The perfect combo of smug, evil, and dumb.

      • MikeS

        Not according to NPR:

        Granholm is in many ways the perfect person to help pitch the United States’ ambitious shift to EVs. As a two-term former governor of Michigan, she helped rescue the auto industry during the 2008 global financial crisis, and she’s a longtime EV enthusiast. (Her family recently switched from the Chevy Bolt to the Ford Mustang Mach-E.)

        That makes her uniquely well positioned to envision the future of the auto industry and to sell the dream of what that future could look like.

        I sit on a township board in a rural area. And I am a longtime food enthusiast. I guess that makes me uniquely well positioned to lead the USDA.

      • Robonerfherder

        she helped rescue the auto industry during the 2008 global financial crisis

        By fucking the US taxpayers and consumers good and hard.

      • MikeS

        Which is what it’s going to take to expand the charging infrastructure like they want. So, I guess NPR is right; she is qualified.

      • DrOtto

        Talk to a shareholder and ask how they fared.

      • Sensei

        +1 UAW pensioner!

      • SDF-7

        I strongly suspect you’d do a better job for the citizens — a worse job for the sycophants and big industries who’ve invested in regulatory capture.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Lets see. Ethics violations – check. Multiple Hatch Act violations – check, Overall power-hungry hack – check,

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      Most of us will look at that and say, “Forcing people into electric cars is stupid. Stop it.” Bureaucrats will look at it and say, “We need more money.”

    • R.J.

      I am investing in tar and feather futures. Anyone else?

      • Grosspatzer

        I sict with tried and true instruments. Stocks. And pillories.

    • ron73440

      The administration’s ambitious energy agenda, if successful, could significantly cut U.S. emissions and reshape Americans’ lives in fundamental ways, including by putting many more people in electric vehicles.

      It doesn’t CUT emmissions, it just makes them in a different location.

      And they want to put you in an EV whether you want to or not.

      Noticably missing from the goals: reduce costs and improve the life of Americans.

      Not that they could do those things, but at least they used to pretend that the peasants were important to them.

      • R.J.

        They could reduce costs and improve the life of Americans. The could delete 2/3s of the laws, and fire themselves.

      • Brochettaward

        The cultists never mention that America has successfully reduced emissions at a greater rate than anyone else just through innovation int he private sector. And it didn’t take trillions to be spent.

    • Sean

      J.D. Power found that when non-Tesla drivers pull up at a charging station, they leave without charging 20% of the time, because the chargers were either all busy or not functioning.

      LOL!

      Chumps.

      • Sensei

        Is it a problem when you can’t fill up at the gas station one out of five times?

      • Fourscore

        Next convenience store, 2 blocks, cold beer

  23. The Late P Brooks

    So an Energy Department staffer tried parking a nonelectric vehicle by one of those working chargers to reserve a spot for the approaching secretary of energy.

    I read that yesterday. Quite the dog and pony show. They’d really be in trouble without Musk taking pity on them.

    • Sensei

      +1 NASA / Boeing Starliner Porkfest

    • The Other Kevin

      These people are so bad at politics. How hard could it be for a few staff members to make that trip ahead of time to try it out? And either work out the kinks, or scrap the whole thing. Scott Adams is right, we have a crisis of competence.

      • Fourscore

        Just carry an extra battery in the trunk, for emergencies

      • The Other Kevin

        Just pull a small trailer with a gas-powered generator on it. Duh.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    mostly likely shitty Electrify America

    If I knew previously, I had forgotten. Electrify America is the bastard incestuous offspring of Volkswagen and the EPA, as part of the Dieselgate settlement.

    • Sensei

      That is correct.

      The point that I like to make to anyone that will listen is that people were put in to prison in the US and Europe over Dieselgate.

      Takata, the airbag manufacturer, knowingly killed and continue to kill people with defective products and as far as I’m aware – zero criminal prosecutions.

      They both happened concurrently.

      • DrOtto

        Because you can’t opt out of airbags for your car due to “safety” regulations and Takata is the main manufacturer.

      • Sensei

        VW may have statistically killed people. Takata actually and directly killed people.

        It’s unreal.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Takata didn’t challenge or threaten the authority of the King’s Men.

  25. Tundra

    Here we go again.

    The entire release.

    Based on an evaluation of the totality of the evidence, the benefit-risk profile is favorable for individuals 6 months of age and older to receive an updated COVID-19 mRNA vaccine. Although serious outcomes from COVID-19 are less common in younger individuals, they do occur, and it has been demonstrated that recently receiving a COVID-19 vaccine reduces the risk of such serious outcomes.

    No. Fuck off.

    • Sensei

      Still “emergency use”.

      “Today, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration took action approving and authorizing for emergency use updated COVID-19 vaccines formulated to more closely target currently circulating variants and to provide better protection against serious consequences of COVID-19, including hospitalization and death.”

      • Robonerfherder

        I thought the administration ended the emergency that granted the legal cover.

      • SDF-7

        Me too… plus I thought they were finally admitting to alternative treatments, which would also negate the “emergency use” wouldn’t it?

        Of course… FYTW I’m sure comes into play — but I did think getting on the kids schedules removed the need for this fig leaf.

      • Sensei

        That may actually be beneficial for some employees and allow them to opt out.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I believe the surrounding authorizations and legal protection, such as EUA, either continues indefinitely or sunsets at a later date.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Ahh, ready through it. The EUA is for 6mo-11year olds, which still hasn’t been fully approved. Separate full authorizations continue for 12 years and older.

    • Sean

      Never.

      • Robonerfherder

        Your answer is terse and to the point.

        Mine is more verbose and bloodthirsty.

        *censored*

      • SDF-7

        “Hey buddy… you got a dead narrative in there?”

    • SDF-7

      Although serious outcomes from COVID-19 are less common in younger individuals, they do occur, and it has been demonstrated that recently receiving a COVID-19 vaccine reduces the risk of such serious outcomes.

      Show your fucking work, FDA. What’s the case number versus population for “do occur”? 1 in 1e06? 1 in 1e09? 1e12? How serious is the outcome in question? And how “recent” does it need to be (given all the data about drop offs after about 6 weeks on past cycles) to have any benefit? And show your work on actual side effects and those risks.

      I don’t expect them to do a damned bit of this, of course — just to say from on high once again: “It is better… trust us!” when they’ve taken the public trust, slammed it with a bolt gun in the head, chunked it into a shallow grave, pissed on the grave and done the dance of joy on top of the piss.

      • The Other Kevin

        The FDA employs more propaganda writers than scientists at this point.

      • MikeS

        As part of today’s actions, the bivalent Moderna and Pfizer-BioNTech COVID-19 vaccines are no longer authorized for use in the United States.

        “Why not?”, nobody in the media asked.

      • Grosspatzer

        LOL

  26. The Late P Brooks

    Takata, the airbag manufacturer, knowingly killed and continue to kill people with defective products and as far as I’m aware – zero criminal prosecutions.

    Killing people- who cares? The place is infested with them, and they’re making more of ’em every day. We only have one planet.

    • MikeS

      The footprints thing is definitely good info to file away.

      • Robonerfherder

        Learn to fly

      • R.J.

        Heh. Or learn to use heat producing chemicals to your advantage to distract drones.

      • Beau Knott

        Buffalo Springfield Expecting to Fly

      • Grosspatzer

        Yes! A Neil Young tune that doesn’t suck!

    • Grosspatzer

      Chuck?

    • The Other Kevin

      In the 70’s one of the Chicago DJ’s had a segment called Animal Stories. In one there was an orangutan that threw poop and they called it “Dr. Skyhook”. If only they had this story.

      • R.J.

        Best new Glib handle would be “Dr. Skyhook” with a picture of Dr Zaius from Planet of the Apes.

  27. Fourscore

    Thanks, Animal, I’m hooked again.

  28. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking out of control bureaucracies

    The World Bank is no longer just focused on eradicating poverty, but also on other impending global challenges — like pandemics, climate change and food insecurity, its president Ajay Banga told CNBC’s Tanvir Gill on Saturday.

    “There’s no way there’s enough money in the multilateral development bank, or even in governments … that can drive the kinds of changes we need for this polycrisis. Getting the private sectors’ capital and ingenuity into the game is going to be very important,” he told CNBC in an exclusive interview on the sidelines of the Group of 20 nations leaders’ summit in New Delhi.

    Pull the fucking plug.

    • Gustave Lytton

      “Getting a cut from tax collectors isn’t cutting it. We need world commie government to seize all of humanity’s collective wealth and resources to be used in a way that we will determine.”

    • slumbrew

      ”polycrisis”

      Get outta here with that transparent attempt at a power-grab.

      • Not Adahn

        Wait, I thought the polycrisis came after the transcrisis and before the mapcrisis?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Where does the bubblegum crisis fit in on that timeline?

      • SDF-7

        It doesn’t kick in until 2032. 2040 if you want a crappier variant.

      • Robonerfherder

        I got polycrisis fibrosis one time.

      • Robonerfherder

        There is no fucking way that those kids weren’t being passed around and used like walking/talking fleshlights.

        What was just cheesy to me then, now sets my pedo radar off.

      • R.J.

        It’s clearly a Menudocrisis which only the government can solve. We need MOAR money! ALL the monies!

      • Not Adahn

        “We could be fined up to twenty thousand dollars per Menudo.”

        -Ivan Alexeev, “Tapeheads.”

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Nah man, they were just the Hispanic Jackson Five and as everyone knows that was completely above board.

      • MikeS

        Livin’ la loco crisis

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Go Banga yourself Ajay.

    • Rebel Scum

      like pandemics, climate change and food insecurity

      Governments are causing two of these.

  29. Robonerfherder

    Fuck

    https://nakedemperor.substack.com/p/the-next-phase-in-ukraine

    Yesterday, Boris Johnson, the former Prime Minister of the UK, made yet another surprise visit to Ukraine.

    Fuck

    His visit coincides with a Nato announcement that the alliance plans to launch the biggest military exercise since the cold war. 41,000 troops will be assembled next year to test readiness to repel a Russian invasion, according to the FT.

    Fuck

    In another interview, Nuland said that the US needs to help Ukraine “have what it needs to put some of Russia’s most precious assets at risk”.

    Fuckity fuck fuck fuck

    Just fucking stop, you fucking psychopaths

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      There’s no way they really think a Russian invasion of a NATO nation is even remotely likely. Even their policy proposals and military decisions are pure political propaganda bullshit now.

      • Robonerfherder

        Until the national pols step in and put NATO back in its box and throw away the key, I don’t put anything past the warmongers.

      • Brochettaward

        There were people on this very site who with a straight face argued that Putin was crazy enough to try and steamroll Europe. I won’t name names…

        The propaganda is strong when it comes to Russia.

    • Sean

      o.O