STEVE SMITH SUBSTITUTE LINKS

by | Nov 10, 2023 | Cryptids, Daily Links | 136 comments

STEVE SMITH GRAMPA WAS VETERAN!

 

STEVE SMITH HERE DO SUBSTITUTE LINKS. HIM HAPPY HALP, HIM ALSO HAVE RACCOON IN POCKET. HA HA! HIM KNOW HOOMANS HAVE VETERAN DAY TOMORROW. GRAMPA SMITH SERVE…HIM RAPE MOST OF EASTERN FRONT IN GREAT BIG WAR. GRAMPA STILL LIVE EUROPE.

NOW STEVE SMITH GIVE FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN HOOMANS SOME GOODEST LINKS!

  1. COUSIN SEA SMITH MAY VISIT SOON!
  2. STEVE SMITH THINK SKOOL STRIKE IN PORTLAAND AM SILLY.
  3. STEVE SMITH TIRED BEING STALKED IN CASCADIA.
  4. MUSIC.

 

FREE CASCADIA!

About The Author

STEVE SMITH

STEVE SMITH

STEVE SMITH PROMINENT FOREST LAWYER. AND RAPESQUATCH OF IMPORTANCE. ONE TIME GRAND MUFTI OF CASCADIA. FREE CASCADIA!

136 Comments

  1. kinnath

    No Steve Smiths around here. Just a bunch of drunken Paddys.

    • Pat

      I resemble that remark!

    • slumbrew

      Hey! I’m not… I mean I’m not a…

      Shit.

  2. Pat

    A population of orcas is being spotted around Puget Sound, in higher numbers year after year

    But that can’t be possible, or else all the propaganda I was fed throughout my entire childhood about bent-fin orcas going extinct because of Sea World profiteers would have been wrong.

      • The Other Kevin

        Orcas are the Hamas of the animal world. Mark my words.

      • Fourscore

        But they seem nice

      • hayeksplosives

        That’s an interesting phenomenon. Especially what appears to be older orcas teaching the younger ones to attack boats, and usually just disabling the boat rather than trying to get to the soft, gooey humans.

      • SDF-7

        We’ll need a ruling from OMWC since he loves the inspiring flick so much….

    • Aloysious

      Reminds me a little bit of that not so good movie from 1977? Orca.

      • Spudalicious

        Orca was no Jaws.

      • The Last American Hero

        Orcas kill Great Whites. Easily.

      • Mojeaux

        Yes, in fact, as their population grows, they’re driving sharks out of their normal habitats.

  3. hayeksplosives

    STEVE SMITH TIRED BEING STALKED IN CASCADIA.

    Maybe I’ll just stay home and read a book this weekend…

  4. The Other Kevin

    We’re seeing more and more self checkout lines at stores, and there is talk of automation for fast food. Can we do something equivalent for teachers?

    • Pat

      Khan Academy?

      • hayeksplosives

        I wouldn’t turn down a job candidate who’d been k-12 educated through Khan as long as they could pass some well-written tests. I’d want to see evidence of some travel and ability to socialize,

        But most jobs I interview candidates for need degrees. Would an engineering school accept a candidate based on standardized tests alone? They should, and if the student can cut it, great!!

      • robc

        Georgia Tech was accepting home schoolers back in the 80s, so I don’t see why not. Put up a good enough SAT score and you are in. It worked for me and my shitty HS grades.

      • Pat

        I did homeschooling in high school, but it was an accredited program through an actual school, so I got the same diploma every other schmo that graduated in the state got. Since something like a third of incoming college freshman need remedial math and English courses, I’m not sure how much difference it could possibly make if you walked in without one anyway. The standardized testing is turning into a joke, too. The SAT “adversity score” absolutely *will* make a comeback, and that’s after they’ve already made the test successively less rigorous for 30 years. It would probably be better if there were something like the GRE for undergraduate admissions, or if colleges just administered their own admission exams, but you’re eventually going to keep running into the same problem when lack of rigor is the feature, not the bug.

      • rhywun

        The whole idea of testing for competence is basically over and done with, because racial equity. Until the culture shakes off that madness.

      • Mojeaux

        So my son got a scholarship to Colorado Tech through Pizza Hut and all he’s doing is testing out of shit and piling up credits. He finds it frighteningly easy.

        Anyway, he had to take a couple of 100-level tests to assess his competency with the credits not being transferrable. I laughed and said, “Those used to be numbered in the 90s.”

        I don’t know what it means they’ve bumped them up to freshman numbers.

      • R C Dean

        “I’d want to see evidence of some travel and ability to socialize,“

        Moreso than a government school grad? If so, why?

      • hayeksplosives

        To ensure that the person hasn’t been isolated from others for 18 years.

        The proper socialization thing is tough to pin down in a single interview.

      • R C Dean

        Fair enough. I just wouldn’t assume government school socialization suffices, so the “hard to pin down in a single interview” isn’t just for homeschoolers.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Unfortunately with the failure of remote teaching during the pandemic. Localities will learn the wrong lessons. And rather than figure out how to make automation work for teaching they’ll double down on in person learning.

      • The Other Kevin

        See I was thinking robot teachers. But you’re right.

      • SDF-7

        At least the lessons of “Kill all humans” won’t have to change.

      • Ted S.

        You’re hot for robot teacher?

        Wait until robot teacher tries to have sex with the students.

      • The Other Kevin

        I’m telling you guys, Real Doll plus AI is going to change the world.

      • SDF-7

        As long as they program the male Real Dolls with enough grip strength to open pickle jars and sufficient targeting to take out spiders with a shoe.

        Then we’re in real trouble.

  5. The Other Kevin

    FBI busts prostitution ring that includes unnamed politicians.

    Republicans ok new FBI headquarters.
    New Republican majority leader says there’s not enough evidence to impeach Biden.

    I’m sure none of this is connected in any way.

    https://twitter.com/MZHemingway/status/1723055001382109549

    • Pat

      Well the FBI certainly hasn’t been exerting political influence through strategic blackmail since the 1950s, so that can’t be it.

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        I love me some Calvin Coolidge but he made a huge mistake when he appointed J. Edgar Hoover as director of the Bureau of Investigation in 1924. The BOI essentially became the FBI. He served until 1972.

        So their non exertion of political influence started long before the 50’s.

      • Pat

        Fair enough, but the level of surveillance in the post-war period, and then during the civil rights era, got ramped up to 11 and set the stage for our post-9/11 panopticon. Which is weird, since FISA totally reined in those civil rights era abuses…

      • SDF-7

        Professor Plum: But is the FBI in the habit of cleaning up after multiple murders?

        Wadsworth: Yes, Why do you think it’s run by a man called Hoover?

      • Suthenboy

        Yeah…I am thinking also of the Vegas shooting.

        The only way to drain the swamp is to start by dismantling the FBI. The job would be 75% done with that one move.

      • hayeksplosives

        The Las Vegas what?

        /half the population

    • Suthenboy

      They cant release the names…if they did they would not be able to blackmail the people on the list.
      This is how the deep state comes to own the people at the helm.

      • The Other Kevin

        It really seems like they’re doing it right out in the open these days. What are you little people gonna do about it? Vote for different people who are also on the list?

      • SDF-7

        Yeah, well — not that I’m encouraging it… but I’m rereading the Honor Harrington series (because light brain fluff is relaxing)… and the People’s Republic of Haven is about to have its little coup from their Rob S. Pierre (get it? Weber is sooooo subtle 😉 ). And several comments about how the mob keeps voting itself more and more largess from the treasury, the elites aren’t held accountable anymore as long as they throw money in the trough, nothing gets maintained or done well… and this all lasts until enough people get fed up and take down the government feels a little more apt than it did several years back when I first read it.

        One of those “this will continue — until it can’t” type thoughts. Getting rid of the pressure valves of the elites having any accountability and the people having any vestige of participating in government is a perilous path for those currently in charge.

    • SDF-7

      Oh, and I’m sure this has nothing to do with him criticizing the PPP administration immigration policies lately either…. Their motives are as pure as the East Palestine snow…..

      • The Other Kevin

        See my comment above. He was literally on the way to talk to Biden about the border, and he went back because this broke open. The timing is way too convenient.

      • Suthenboy

        Dem Mayor of our largest city with a national megaphone breaks ranks and starts loudly criticizing Biden on crucial issue in upcoming election. In short order the FBI is crawling up his ass with a microscope.
        Nah….just a coincidence.

        Shit, they dont bother trying anymore.

  6. SDF-7

    COUSIN SEA SMITH MAY VISIT SOON!

    Given orcas are big dolphins more than whales, and dolphins are now acknowledged as the rapists of the seas… Yeah… a whole pod of SEA SMITHS comin’ atcha…. don’t go in the water, indeed….

  7. Suthenboy

    Looking over the Vox article Fatty posted in the last thread….holy crap. It is one steaming pile of fiction. either the writer has no clue what inflation is (likely) or is spinning a narrative that contains no information or coherent logic (also likely).

    Stunning.
    We may have lost Jezebel but by God, we still have Vox.

  8. SDF-7

    STEVE SMITH TIRED BEING STALKED IN CASCADIA.

    Just want them to leave you alone? Or are you going to plant misleading clues, get them to branch out to other cryptids? Drive them nuts when you root them out.

    • The Other Kevin

      STEVE SMITH DO STALKING AROUND HERE.

      • R C Dean

        BY STALKING, MEAN . . . .

      • hayeksplosives

        The main topic of the Bee piece is hilarious, but it’s the little touches that make it special.

        “ said conservative commentator Fidge McNithers to his podcast audience of 12.”

        Fidge McNithers, lol

        “… said former CNN anchor Brian Stelter to his audience of a single votive candle featuring a saintly image of Dr. Fauci.”

    • SDF-7

      They ate a lot of Taco Bell first?

    • creech

      Sick! I’ve blown 2 foot putts.

    • Suthenboy

      I am calling bullshit. 401ft putt? Bullshit.

      *I once made a dead center shot with a 38spl 3″ barrel on a beer can at 600+ yards.
      Offhand.
      With very little aiming.
      Unluckiest beer can in the history of the world.*

      • Fourscore

        Elmer Keith claimed killing a deer at a 1/2 mile with his trusty .44 Mag. Some math guy figured he’d have to hold 46 feet over the deer.

      • Suthenboy

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJ3XwizTqDw

        Posted before but always worth another look.
        Yep…I half assed lined it up then raised the pistol oooohhhhh about like that…pow.
        It took a couple of seconds to arrive on target then my friend and I stood frozen there with our jaws dropped for a minute before we could say anything.

    • The Other Kevin

      I think that’s part of the “+” right?

    • hayeksplosives

      While I don’t think it’s hurting anybody, I would run far away from a dude with that fetish. I jus can’t see how that bit of lunacy could be the only thing “off” about a person.

      • Suthenboy

        Smart girl.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        You would also probably need to be turned on by diapers and changing them so it must usually be a case of weirdo hooks up with weirdo.

      • slumbrew

        “you’re someone’s kink”

        h/t to Neph

      • Ted S.

        I was thinking of this.

        And you can watch Dracula do comedy!

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Back to the drawing board

    On Wednesday, NuScale and its backers pulled the plug on the multibillion-dollar Idaho Falls plant. They said they no longer believed the first-of-its-kind plant, known as the Carbon Free Power Project (CFPP) would be able to recruit enough additional customers to buy its power.

    Many of the small utilities underwriting the pioneering project, members of a group called the Utah Associated Municipal Power Systems (UAMPS) saw the pint-sized nuclear plant as a potential solution to pressure to reduce their carbon emissions. The Department of Energy, which was due to host the plant at Idaho National Lab, awarded $1.4 billion to the project over 10 years.

    But as WIRED reported in February, the utilities backing the plant were spooked late last year by a 50 percent increase in the projected costs for the project—even after factoring in substantial funds from the Inflation Reduction Act. The Idaho Falls reactors’ chances of survival began to look slimmer.

    At the time, commitments in place to buy the reactor’s future power covered less than 25 percent of its output. UAMPS set itself a year-end deadline to bump that figure to 80 percent by recruiting new customers. Reaching that number was seen as key to ensuring the project’s long-term viability. As the project moved into site-specific planning and construction, its costs were poised to become more difficult to recoup if the plant ultimately failed, heightening the risks for the members.

    Lots of unanswered questions.

  10. Shpip

    ‘One day longer, one day stronger’: Portland Public Schools teachers strike negotiations continue

    Something I’ve never understood: compared to other low-level bureaucrats whose job requires a college credential (social workers, probation officers, etc.) teachers make pretty good bank — especially when you consider that they only work 200 days a year. Why are they always crying poor?

    • rhywun

      Because they can.

      • Fourscore

        It’s called reverse ransom .

        “We’ll keep your kids if you pay us enough. Otherwise we’re sending them home”

    • Sensei

      Depends on location too.

      Wealthy districts pay more, but not substantially so. Sometimes becomes difficult to live where you teach.

      Ideal combination is cash trade (plumbing, electrical) and spouse who is a teacher paying your healthcare and decent pension.

      A few of those couples in my town. Higher standard of living than I have.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Not enough

    As voting on the sellout contracts negotiated by the United Auto Workers at Ford, General Motors and Stellantis continues, significant opposition has emerged, with workers voting to reject the contract at four General Motors plants.

    According to results posted by United Auto Workers Local 598 Thursday, production and skilled trades workers at Flint Assembly voted by a combined 51.8 percent margin against the contract. The exact totals have not been released. There are over 4,500 workers employed at the plant, which builds the profitable Chevrolet Silverado and GMC Sierra light trucks.

    Workers at three smaller facilities, Pontiac Stamping (212-169), Marion, Indiana Stamping (257-218) and Romulus, Michigan Powertrain (351-332) have also voted against the contract.

    ——-

    Reacting to the vote at Flint Engine, one worker posted on Facebook about the UAW’s supposedly “historic” contract. “Drop in a bucket if you ask me since the higher-ups are raking in millions a year in pay! I don’t think it’s balanced at all! Whenever did they take concessions like the hourly people did over the years and the retirees? It’s their turn to be cut for eight years plus.”

    *Kamikaze misses battleship, crashes in ocean*

    • Pat

      General Motors (GM) was among the first to pull its advertisements from Twitter after Elon Musk’s purchase of the site. GE vets vendors according to LGBTQ policies, is part of the Global Alliance for Responsible Media, and does not provide its employees with protections against viewpoint discrimination. The company covers the cost of “medically necessary transition-related care” for its employees and their children. GE pledged $10 million to BLM and related causes and supports and funds LGBTQ causes and organizations. GM has spoken out against state-level efforts to reform its own election rules. GM has donated to the Equality PAC, the Progressive Choices PAC, and the Progressive Americans for Democracy PAC. GM is a signatory of the Business Roundtable’s 2019 Statement on the Purpose of Corporation, which promotes stakeholder capitalism, and is committed to carbon neutrality by 2040. GM discriminates against religious organizations in its charitable giving. For these reasons, General Motors receives a High Risk rating.

      Behold my tiny violin, playing the world’s saddest fucking song for the poor executives at GM being bullied by the progressive politics they generously support…

      • rhywun

        LOL what a bunch of fart-sniffers.

        Multiply that by 10,000 or so and we come close to understanding how very much we’ve lost the plot here.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    “Maybe now the company will know they are going up against more than just the bargaining committee. They are going up against the thousands of rank-and-file workers that have been abused and exploited by the company for decades. They are going up against workers who are not afraid to tell them who really runs things around here.”

    Yup.

    • rhywun

      OFFS. Delusional.

    • creech

      That must be why the Union Workers Auto Company is the most successful, right? I mean, if they “really run things around here,” they ought to set up their own auto company and really demonstrate the true value of their labor.

  13. Shpip

    Bigg’s are “The Other Killer Whale” — not the salmon-eating endangered southern resident killer whales, but the orcas thriving in our local waters by feasting on marine mammals.

    This has my seal of approval.

    • creech

      I recall reading something about the reasons why orcas and sharks are proliferating is that there’s been a couple decades of “not killing a million baby seals each year.” Seals are more plentiful, therefore their predators are too.

  14. Aloysious

    larf at the alt-text.

  15. Mojeaux

    Re orcas

    Dolphins are asshoe.

    • The Hyperbole

      He is the only animal other than man who kills for revenge. He has one mate, and if she is harmed by man, he will hunt down that person with a relentless, terrible vengeance – across seas, across time, across all obstacles.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        They should make a movie about that that includes a whale fetus.

      • The Hyperbole

        Throw in Richard Harris, Bo Derek, Charlotte Rampling, and that Injun from “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest” and I think you’ll have a blockbuster.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        42

      • Mojeaux

        They’re getting a taste for humans. Revenge doesn’t have to figure in it. We are fun to hunt and apparently delicious.

      • Mojeaux

        Never mind their smaller rapetastic cousins. Sea Smith got nothin’ on bottle-nose dolphins.

      • The Hyperbole

        Orcas or dolphins? I was talking about Orcas, fuck them dolphins.

      • Mojeaux

        Orcas are dolphins.

      • slumbrew

        Family: Delphinidae

        I dunno, man, that’s a tough position to defend.

      • Mojeaux

        I expected that half an hour ago. Slow much?

      • R.J.

        Well, I could’ve told you that!

        Uh, I mean, that’s awful.

      • Mojeaux

        Were you on the Uruguyan soccer team plane? Would explain so much!

      • R.J.

        Who told you!!??!!

    • Shpip

      Dolphins are asshoe.

      Years ago, I used to fish for barrelfish and other big boys waaaaay out (150 miles, 900 feet of water) in the Gulf of Mexico.

      Various pods of dolphins learned to associate the sound of boat engines with the dinner bell ringing and would show up within an hour of us finding one of our spots. If you were fighting a fish, they’d swoop in and leave you half a fish — and not the good half.

      Dolphins are the lawyers of the sea.

      • Mojeaux

        Is barrelfish good?

      • Shpip

        Absolutely delicious, but frighteningly rare. However, if you ever see it or tilefish on a menu, get it. You’ll be glad you did.

  16. Mojeaux

    A country I’ve never been to, but long for,* is getting pissy about socialism.

    *Yeah, so this all came on when I was 20 and first heard “Concierto de Aranjuez.” That’s all. My dad thought that was utterly stupid.

    • R.J.

      That was a good summation. I asked Spaniard to come comment. My chances are slim.

      • rhywun

        Half the big nation states in Europe are patchwork cultures barely held together – Spain is certainly not unique in that regard. Though it was easier to keep them together before people got to vote for stuff.

    • Name's BEAM. *James* BEAM.

      I’m doing physical training and research to walk the Camino de Santiago (“Camino Frances,” the “French Way”) next September time frame. 778 kilometres (approx. 483 miles) in around 33 days, plus several rest days. It’s still almost ten months away and I’m getting nervous already. I’m also studying Spanish, which, so far, makes more sense to me than the French of my ancestors…

      • Mojeaux

        I keep my DuoLingo tab pinned, but haven’t touched it in months. *hangs head in shame*

      • Name's BEAM. *James* BEAM.

        Y’know what would motivate you?

        Commit to walking the Camino. If you need a wingman, I’ll volunteer.

      • Mojeaux

        Nah, bruh. I can walk without flying somewhere to do it.

        But! I do hope to get to Spain one day.

      • Name's BEAM. *James* BEAM.

        You’ll see a lot of Spain in 33 days, and get immersed in the culture.

        Plus, you can always go to Barcelona, Seville, Madrid, Valencia etc. afterwards. ;-)  Having been to all of them, I can heartily recommend ’em.

      • rhywun

        Spain is gorgeous and a lot friendlier than France, TBH.

      • Name's BEAM. *James* BEAM.

        As someone with French ancestry, it pains me to say that you, sir, are correct.

      • Mojeaux

        Been to France. Parisians were not rude to us. I tried to speak my high school French, got amused smiles, a metaphorical pat on the head, and conversed in English.

      • Mojeaux

        My people are from southern Belgium. They get laughed at in Paris for their redneck accent.

      • Sensei

        As a very bad French speaker, it’s the only time I have interactions with native speakers who make fuck all attempt to communicate.

        My pidgin Spanish and Italian went much further.

      • Pat

        I tried to speak my high school French, got amused smiles, a metaphorical pat on the head, and conversed in English.

        In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language.

      • Name's BEAM. *James* BEAM.

        My people are from southern Belgium. They get laughed at in Paris for their redneck accent.

        You should see how my Normandy and Brittany rellies talk about the Québécois.  {snigger}

      • Mojeaux

        My brother served his LDS mission in Quebec. He says Parisians think his accent is adorable.

      • rhywun

        they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French

        I got the same in China. Yeah, I was reading out of a phrase book (some of the time) but I had had a couple semesters of lessons and even the phrases I was comfortable with just got blank stares.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        I tried to speak my high school French

        Mon crayon est large, et mon crayon est jaune.

      • slumbrew

        776 day streak, going strong.

        Not a humble-brag. Just bragging.

    • R.J.

      Link is taking forever to open. But I can tell what it is!

    • rhywun

      colluded with the Turkish government

      🤪

    • Derpetologist

      There’s a Dilbert cartoon where he decides to interview a teenager and his shocked at his ignorance of history and geography. The questions he asked were “how many people died in WW2?” and “what is the deepest lake in North America?”. He then laments the teen’s ignorance. The teen then asks him “who is MC Hammer?” Dilbert says that’s not important. The teen responds “oh I get it now; everything *you* know is important and everything *I* know doesn’t matter.”

      There’s a website that has all the Dilbert cartoons, but I was unable to find it. Perhaps that too got memory-holed when Scott Adams was cancelled.

    • rhywun

      JFC.

      Stop this insanity already.

    • Pat

      We just go from “it’s not happening” to “it’s happening, and that’s a good thing” with no intermediary steps anymore.

      • rhywun

        They’re just fucking with us at this point.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      I’m reminded of a scene in Dave where he says so we’re spending money to make people feel better about their cars. These ad campaigns are not really anything new.

    • Grumbletarian

      My BIL, sister, and one niece had to drive from the Austin area to DFW for an event this weekend. He has a brand new Tesla Model 3, she has a mid-10’s Camaro. They took some overnight luggage and other items too. They’re borrowing my 2013 F-150 for the weekend.