Thanksgiving Morning Links

by | Nov 23, 2023 | Daily Links | 249 comments

Tomb Raider and I are in the Big City for the Big Event; she’s originally from the Bronx and her kids live in Bronx and Brooklyn. And as a bonus, her ex-husband will be there. I’m sure at dinner tonight, someone will try prodding me into saying something I won’t regret. I dunno, maybe they’ll want my affirmation about the Attack On Democracy® or the hell that Argentina is about to experience or the Palestinian Holocaust. Whatever, I’ll try to just smile, nod, and say something innocuous while being glared at by 5 other pairs of eyes. But hey, we’ll have excellent food and some magnums of pretty fine wine I hauled along. Hope yours is equally fun.

Know what else is fun? Birthdays, and today’s include one of Team Blue’s many racists; a guy with a mysterious attraction; a guy whom we can blame for talk radio; a guy who thought “Billy Pratt” was insufficiently horrifying; a guy second only to Curly for best comic actor; a guy who, if we dig deep enough, likely had a Hillary Clinton connection; a pitcher with an amusingly shaky windup; a guy who thought Black Lives Matter before it became a grift;  a corrupt, evil, and rather stupid Chicago politician (though that doesn’t narrow things down); a great argument for term limits and manssieres; the guy who taught me everything I know about Mexican food; one of the few Dead pianists who lived; a guy who took a country down the toilet at a speed that Biden and Carter would have envied; and a woman too crazy for even me to bang.

Let’s see what today’s news brings us.

 

OK, I’ve been to some reasonably unhinged office parties, but apparently I should have had a career at Taco Bell.

 

When faced with a choice between the Hat and the Hair, the Dutch opt for the Hair.

 

Man, this story just keeps getting better.

 

“He looka like… not a man.”

 

Imagine, an Obama official being an asshole bigoted loon. That’s even less likely than a Biden tranny stealing luggage. Right?

 

“I was just doing what the sign said!”

 

Well, this is a shock. Uh-huh.

 

I was just thinking about this song from a birthday boy. Dude can play.

About The Author

Old Man With Candy

Old Man With Candy

Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me. Wait, wrong book, I'll find something else.

249 Comments

  1. Pat

    Ladies and gentlemen,

    My apologies for a pre-half hour off-topic thread-hijacking. Last year on this holiday I began what I hope to sustain as an annual tradition of taking the time to write out some things for which I am thankful. And so, it is that time year of again when Pat, the grousing grouch, garrulously attempts to grok gratitude.

    Despite the past year being a tumultuous one – what the sports people might euphemistically refer to as a “rebuilding year” – I have much for which to be grateful, and I think there’s value in taking a break from my usually surly disposition to acknowledge and appreciate that. In this particular year, I am marking another annual occasion that happens by coincidence of timing to fall on the same day, and so it seems especially auspicious to spend a moment taking stock of that for which gratitude is rightly owed.

    First and foremost, although to call it humble would be overselling it, and although if you catch me on any other day you will find me bitching about a thousand trivialities with regard to it, I am very grateful for my new (to me) home and property. I am especially grateful to have been fortunate enough to purchase it without any type of debt instrument after losing the (undocumented) equity I had in my parents’ home when it (essentially) escheated to the Nevada Medicaid Estate Recovery division after my mother’s untimely death in the summer of 2022. Had I not been able to secure this place, I would have been in a very thorny situation. Having closed on this property merely 3 days before I would have otherwise been facing the prospect of living in an extended stay, perhaps indefinitely, puts me in mind of a parable.

    The income from my part-time business being not-quite-sufficient to sustain myself in these new surroundings, I’ve been forced to do that which I’ve happily postponed until middle age: get a real job. Actually, two real jobs. Neither of which is glamorous, or even anything that I, or anyone else for that matter, would consider a career. On any other day you would probably find me distraught at my job prospects being so pitiable at this stage of my life. But today, I am genuinely overwhelmed with gratitude that, despite having squandered my best years, I am in a position where all of my financial needs can be adequately supplied, with a generous portion left over, even from such menialities. I have always been of the opinion that no job is beneath the dignity of the man who is willing to take it, and despite the bruise to my ego, I’m grateful for the opportunity to live by that principle.

    As I prepare to submit this post from one of my three personal computers, each of which has more computing power than the advanced supercomputers at the finest research universities in the year of my birth, I am thankful to live in a country and society where such superfluities are considered de rigueur. The mere existence of the high-tech lowlife such as myself is a celebration of the superabundance wrought by the very same capitalism that also delivers us so much that is equally worthy of contempt. Would that the sub-Saharan African villager may one day be faced with the prospect of his privacy being violated by surveillance capitalists being a major cause of consternation. There but for an accident of birth and timing go I.

    In spite of the real and valid infringements of human freedom taking place in modern American society, I am grateful for the privilege of living in a more-free society trending toward becoming less-free, rather than an un-free society. Better to have tasted freedom and lamented its loss than never to have tasted it at all.

    Having become too advanced in years to be subject to a military draft under any but the most dire circumstances, and despite another year of inane saber rattling on the part of the quasi-imperial government that ostensibly represents me, I am grateful that the young men who constitute my fellow countrymen have, at least for the time being, been spared a shooting war with an adversarial superpower. Would that cooler heads should prevail, and they not be sent to their demise unless it be absolutely necessary to repel an existential threat to their rights.

    Time and circumstances conspire to both bring certain people into one’s life, and to take certain others out. In spite of some shifting of the balance, I am grateful for the few close friends I have, and hope that I am soon in a position to repay certain kindnesses that have been extended to me.

    As I prepare to enjoy both top shelf libations and a veritable cornucopia of delicious, wholesome – perhaps even gaudy for a single man – food later today, procured easily even by a man of modest means such as myself, I am humbled and grateful to have such abundance when there are those in this world who will perish this very day for the lack thereof, or who will at the very least have to toil strenuously just to obtain their daily sustenance.

    Lastly, I am grateful as always for this community, and wish to extend thanks to those whose generosity of time, work, money and other resources sustain it. Robc’s two rules of libertarianism stipulate that everyone agrees with libertarians about something, while no two libertarian agree about anything. While I’m no longer certain the moniker “libertarian” applies to me, I am thankful for having this small place of respite in the world where the company is always enjoyable, even when I am outside the consensus.

    Happy Thanksgiving.

    • R.J.

      Happy Thanksgiving! I was literally typing an email to you asking how the job search is going, and making sure you had a place to feast today. Glad to hear you got work and have feast.

    • juris imprudent

      Good morning, well said, and a Happy Thanksgiving to you. I’m sure we will all strive to overlook your temporary lapse from surliness.

    • Sean

      Rock on, Pat.

    • LCDR_Fish

      Hear hear!

      *bangs glass raucous on tabletop*

    • AlexinCT

      Happy Thanksgiving!

    • Ghostpatzer

      Happy Thanksgiving to you, and thanks(!) for reminding me to have a little gratitude. That was lovely.

      • Fourscore

        “When the going gets tough…”

        I bitch, mostly to myself, about anything and everything, it’s good to be reminded that things could be worse (and have been).

        Thanks, Pat, hope to see you at HH

    • Don escaped Texas

      annual tradition

      make this a formal post every year: let’s make this the thing, maybe ever Thanksgiving Eve

    • DrOtto

      This, and a piece I recently read by Jay Leno have bolstered my spirits for this holiday season. Thanks for this.

    • R C Dean

      Bravo.

      Much as I like to complain, there is no denying that I am blessed. I don’t have to worry about where my meals or shelter are coming from. My parents and brother are still with us, and our family is blessedly free of dysfunction. Mrs. Dean brings grace to my life in so many ways. As much as this society disappoints and angers, I still wouldn’t live anywhere else.

    • DEG

      I am in a position where all of my financial needs can be adequately supplied, with a generous portion left over

      Excellent.

    • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

      And happiness back to you, Pat.

      “I have always been of the opinion that no job is beneath the dignity of the man who is willing to take it”

      Fewer true words have been said.

    • Chafed

      Wonderful sentiments. Happy Thanksgiving Pat.

  2. Pat

    manssieres

    I think you mean Bros

  3. Pat

    Though Wilders’ most radical ideas will be rejected by other parties he must work with in order to form a coalition government, fellow populists including Italy’s Deputy Prime Minister and leader of the hard-right League Matteo Salvini welcomed his win as showing that “a new Europe is possible.”

    “And then, for absolutely no reason at all, Hitler was elected…”

    • juris imprudent

      It must suck to really, truly believe you are on the right side of history, and then find out – not so much. Appropriate?

      • Suthenboy

        I always thought ‘being on the right side of history’ was just a meaningless excuse for the ends justify the means, another way to justify breaking a few eggs.

      • juris imprudent

        It is particularly Hegelian/Marxist – a foolish postulate about predicting the future and thus knowing your place in history before it is even history. Sure, it does support that ends justify the means – because you have seen the glorious future and I haven’t (or surely I too would join you). [You in the generic sense, not directed at Suthen.]

      • Suthenboy

        You are thinking it through far more than the people who use the expression do.
        Most of what they say are just buzz phrases. Listening to them it is clear they rarely, if ever really know what they are saying.
        Nearly everything they say can be distilled down to “Do as I say”.

      • AlexinCT

        Most of what they say are just buzz phrases. Listening to them it is clear they rarely, if ever really know what they are saying.

        Most of them don’t.

        But there are always a few that profit form it and know damn well their only goal is to replace the current feudal lords with themselves, in as bloody as possible a way, and the idiots that help them do so be damned during and after the fact.

      • R C Dean

        It’s just gussied up moralistic self-righteous rationalization. “Deus vult” for atheists.

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Suthen nails it down pretty well, but, yes, it is part of the Marxist dialectic that gets used as a means of convincing people that what they are doing leads to utopia.

      • Rat on a train

        Once they win enough power they can rewrite history to whatever they want.

      • Don escaped Texas

        I have read it more as the simple and straightforward: my modern, humane philosophy will triumph over your ancient, brutal, bigoted impulses; you are a dinosaur, and modernity will show that I got to the right answer before you, and, indeed, before most people of my time.

        The only reason one resorts to such a statement, even if they are right, is that they have run out of winning arguments and now resort to insisting that you stipulate to their conclusion. They’re throwing down the old QED without proving anything.

        Or it’s just a saucy exit line after they have proved something. A boss I had at a German firm often found himself unable to outargue my industrial advice, so he would simply pull rank; I would capitulate to his authority but not his argument and remind him over and over: “they are not making this mistake at Toyota.”

  4. Pat

    North Hertfordshire Museum will now refer to emperor Elagabalus with the female pronouns of she and her. […] It said it consulted LGBTQ+ charity Stonewall to ensure “displays, publicity and talks are as up-to-date and inclusive as possible”.

    Smart move going to Stonewall straight away instead of, you know, a historian or something.

    • rhywun

      It’s not like they’ve literally been caught lying about the participation of trannies in their founding mythology or anything.

      • AlexinCT

        Tell a lie enough times…

  5. rhywun

    A museum spokesperson said it was “only polite and respectful to be sensitive to identifying pronouns for people in the past”.

    *bangs head repeatedly on desk*

    • Chafed

      It’s the only way to make it make sense.

  6. Pat

    After a police canvass near the Kum & Go, officers identified Kenneth Lee Kelly, 54, as a suspect in the public pleasure session. “Multiple subjects from Kum & Go, neighboring businesses, and apartments identified the defendant as the subject in the photos,” cops reported.

    Actual footage

  7. rhywun

    Imagine, an Obama official being an asshole bigoted loon.

    I get it, but that is neither a crime nor newsworthy. And pretending it is is not doing the country any favors.

    • juris imprudent

      The Narrative demands that (((some))) are identified as the problem.

    • Pat

      Whaddya mean yelling at a halal street food vendor isn’t just as hateful as murdering Jews?

    • Urthona

      I think this as well.

  8. Gender Traitor

    Man, this story just keeps getting better.

    Given the context in which I usually hear references to the “Rainbow Bridge,” I still wish it had been a couple of dying house pets deciding to go out a la Thelma and Louise.

  9. juris imprudent

    From the headline (over at RCP) I was prepared for something really stupid, which from Sadbeard wouldn’t be unusual. So imagine my surprise when I read this and discover it’s actually pretty good. Not right all around, but not nearly as wrong as I expected.

    • rhywun

      JFC he’s arguing over the minutiae of how to fund the best government-run “core functions” by providing a bunch of examples of “core functions” that are nothing of the sort. Health care? Child care? Mass transit construction?! Pretending these are “core government functions” is how we got in this mess in the first place.

      • Pat

        There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.

        – Peter Drucker

      • Suthenboy

        The vast majority of what the FedGov does is not only not a core function but also unconstitutional, as in they are outside their lane. They simply were not granted the power to do so.
        Government by consent. That means we granted government power within strict bounds. They have inverted that to mean that they grant or allow us rights, property etc.
        Firing 75% of govt. bureaucrats is not about funding, it about stopping the rape.

      • juris imprudent

        But he is quite accurate about the dysfunctional approach we currently use – fund grants, etc. to influence vice doing anything concrete. Of course I disagree with what he thinks is essential (though he gets the IT part right – he just doesn’t see how that is more common than he thinks); and if the DoD had to do without contractors, and made the actual civilian employees work, nothing would be any different functionally, but it would be cheaper.

      • Lackadaisical

        Grants are terrible.

        Several teams of people ‘work’ on getting the grants (costs $) then they all circle jerk to administer the grant (more $) just to hire someone else to actually do the work (the only useful part of the enterprise, still costs more $). But this is how a lot of rando lower tier degreed people who are only good at BSin’ make a living in the government.

    • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

      The comments are kinda fascinating in a train wreck way. A lot of people who think they are very smart, but are so unable to see that a huge part of why you get politicians such as Trump come from their proposed solution: hire more gov’t workers, and then pay them more. A couple people see a part of the problem, a pay discrepancy that encourages dead enders, but refuse to see a way to end that, namely being able to fire crap workers and not promote them out of an inability to do so.

  10. Suthenboy

    A. Grow up.
    B. Libertarian moment? My optimism died a long time ago.
    C. Cause? Looking at the wreckage we will probably never know.
    D. I am sick of this tiresome shit. I dont care what you have between your legs or what you do with it. Stop using it as some lame-ass excuse to tell me what to do.
    E. Racism…more tiresome shit. Sick of hearing about that too.
    F. When they named the store what did they expect to happen?
    G. When bribing it is good to hedge your bets.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      B. Wilders ain’t no libertarian, more of a traditional European rightist but still good in comparison to the lunatic globalists who are currently in charge over there. I won’t say I’m optimistic but I’m looking forward to seeing how he and Milei do (hopefully well but they’re going to have to fight for it).

      • Suthenboy

        The libertarian moment thing was kinda tongue in cheek. Rightists are probably as close as we can ever hope to get to real liberty.

  11. Pat

    Project 2025 is an arm of the Heritage Foundation and it has been criticized for its hard-right, authoritarian agenda—including “dehumanizing” rhetoric towards the LGBTQ community, re-upping Trump’s attempt to include citizenship on the census, leveraging the power of the Justice Department to crack down on critics, and a potentially unconstitutional plan to sic U.S. troops on domestic protesters.

    Damn, citizenship questions on the census where I have to divulge my race, ethnicity, income, number of toilets, and sexual preference? It’s just like Francoist Spain.

  12. Sean

    Happy birthday to TOK 🎂🎈🎉

    • Pat

      Hear hear!

    • The Other Kevin

      Thank you! OMWC actually found some interesting birthdays today. And also Miley Cyrus.

      • Don escaped Texas

        woman too crazy for even me to bang

        some industrious fuck went and created wiki pages for every retarded hillbilly third cousin of hers

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        What, the Memphis phone book?

      • Don escaped Texas

        Memphis is thoroughly retarded

        but methinks the credit for team Cyrus goes to Kentucky

      • Not Adahn

        Dolly says Miley is good people, and I trust her.

      • Don escaped Texas

        OMw/C is the one who won’t bang her*

        I merely accused them of not being from Memphis

        *I get hot over smart chicks, will need to see her CV

      • DEG

        Happy Birthday!

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        HBDTOK.

  13. KK, Non-Man

    Hope yours is equally fun.

    Wow – just come out and say you don’t like us!

    • rhywun

      I’m picturing his day going down something like this.

      • KK, Non-Man

        Looks about right

    • Old Man With Candy

      I happen to know that you have a wonderfully fun visitor.

  14. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Elagabalus: So one of the most perverted human beings in classical history this side of Caligula was possibly (maybe, who the hell really knows?) transgender. Congrats LGBTQ+ community I guess?

    • juris imprudent

      They was just ahead of them’s time!

    • Ghostpatzer

      I thought Elagabalus was a character on Sesame Street. The lesser-known cousin of Snuffleupagus who lived in a closet.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        You have the characters confused, it was Bert and Ernie who were in the closet but, really, didn’t everyone know?

  15. Ghostpatzer

    Mornin’, Old Man, welcome to the Big Apple. Just missed you again, we were in the city for Mrs.Patzer’s hip replacement last weekend. The youngest Patzer and I wandered around aimlessly on Saturday afternoon while awaiting notification from the surgeon. I would rather have met TR while you spent some time corrupting educating TYP. Have fun meeting her ex, should be a hoot.

    • juris imprudent

      I hope Mrs. P has the same speedy recovery as Mrs. JI has had. Today she wants to get up on her horse (and she is ready to do so) – just for a walk-around, not a full ride.

      • Ghostpatzer

        Damn, sounds great! I’m hoping for a future that includes long walks. Our first “date” was a 20K walk for MS, it’s been a while…

      • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

        Hope all is well and a speedier recovery.

    • DEG

      Best wishes for Mrs. Patzer’s recovery.

  16. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Geert Wilders looks like Jimmy Page with an old timey powdered wig sewn to his dome. That aside, he makes the right people stroke out so I’ll be happy to see how he does.

  17. PieInTheSky

    Sohrab Ahmari
    @SohrabAhmari
    Milei is a doctrinaire Hayekian seemingly grown in a secret laboratory funded by the Koch brothers, with the editorial staff of Reason, the extremist libertarian magazine in Washington, serving as the scientists.

    My latest.

    https://twitter.com/SohrabAhmari/status/1727318991075721654

    robby soave is the face of extremist libertarianism.

    • Grumbletarian

      Someone hasn’t read Reason in quite some time.

      • Pat

        Even when it was good it was probably the least ‘extremist’ libertarian publication. Wait until they find out about Lew Rockwell, the Mises Institute and Antiwar.com

      • DEG

        Don’t forget Liberty.

      • R C Dean

        Someone didn’t read the comments yesterday.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The extremists at Reason? What a joke.

      • juris imprudent

        Sohrab is an unintentional comic.

      • rhywun

        I thought it was satire. But from RTFA it seems he’s serious, LOL.

  18. juris imprudent

    Brisket was started at midnight, now about 12 degrees shy of being done – probably two more hours, then an hour to two of rest (except for what I cut into burnt ends). I’ll keep the smoker running and put some wings on (and finish them in the air-fryer). The missus will make her corn pudding, and then we have to decide between slaw and a green salad.

    • PieInTheSky

      sounds overly complicated.

      • juris imprudent

        I slept, it cooked. Wasn’t too complicated for me.

  19. PieInTheSky

    Today in local press has TDS headlines like “Geert Wilders a Trump like politician wins election”

    Geert Wilders predates Trump as a politician by quite a bit

    • juris imprudent

      The entire world revolves around U.S. politics; it is known.

      • PieInTheSky

        is you dinner 6.2$ per person or less?

      • PieInTheSky

        shit this was meant for the brisket thread

    • Old Man With Candy

      Some people pay extra for that.

      • AlexinCT

        SHE PUTS ON THE LOTION OR SHE GETS THE HOSE!

      • mindyourbusiness

        Something something fools and money something…

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      It’s shart but I’m sure there’s some guy somewhere pleasuring himself to it.

    • Suthenboy

      Narcissistic bullshit is not art.

      • R C Dean

        There’s definitely a big overlap in those two circles on the Venn diagram, though.

    • Zwak says the real is not governable, but self-governing.

      Technically it is called performance art. And now you know why that has always been bullshit.

    • Chafed

      Mattress Girl – The Reckoning

  20. Timeloose

    Happy Thanksgiving to all of you US based Glibs. To all others, eat a little more than usual today for Time Turkey.

  21. AlexinCT

    Happy Thanksgiving Glibronis!

  22. PieInTheSky

    According to CNN thanksgiving dinner for 10 people is about 62 dollars. As a Romanian that seem cheap to me, especially relative to US salaries.

    • Timeloose

      Traditionally the foods served are cheap meat (Turkey), lots of cheap startches (potatoes), bread stuffing, inexpensive vegetables like beans, and various gravies.

      • AlexinCT

        There is no way it is going to be just $62 however. Not unless you got leftover turkeys from 3 years ago, cause the turkey alone this year was $50 at a measly 16 lbs in the store.

      • Ted S.

        I *think* (I didn’t look too closely) that the whole birds were running $2.49/lb here.

        Since Thanksgiving is just Dad and me, as will be Christmas, we each picked up one of those 3 lb. Butterball things. Last year they were $13.99; this year they were $16.99. So I don’t want to hear anything from the Brandon supporters about inflation being down.

      • R.J.

        My cheese and fancy meat tray got the price way up there. Add in drinks too.

      • The Hyperbole

        What store? At Kroger they were $.99/lb, $.49/lb if you bought it last week and spent at least 25$ on other shit.

      • AlexinCT

        No Krogers where I am.

    • R C Dean

      10 people couldn’t get a small hamburger with small fries and a small coke at McDonald’s for $62.

    • Suthenboy

      I hope they keep telling us to believe them and not our bank accounts or lying eyes. Keep it up fucktards, right up to Election Day.

    • Not Adahn

      I spend $57 for thanksgiving dinner for two, so CNN is up to its usual standards of veracity.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Just as long as it wasn’t a Bentley like Steed’s. That would have been a tragedy.

    • R C Dean

      I’ve never seen a Bentley I didn’t like. Shame about the car.

  24. Ghostpatzer

    From the department of too little, too late.

    Got a robocall from the local supermarket, it seems I may have purchased some nectarines and/or plums which were contaminated with listeria. Last sold in August 2023. Maybe I can find a morally compromised doctor and physician to help me secure a small payout to help with my retirement nest egg.

    • PieInTheSky

      could be worse, could have been pesticides

    • Timeloose

      They got him right before a brain dead baggage handler was going feed him to the trash compactor where lost luggage ends up.

      • AlexinCT

        That would have been interesting to watch…

  25. PieInTheSky

    She got a bachelors and masters degree in teaching … and is making about $16 per hour.

    This is a classic case of students going to university and never bothering to do the math on whether their degree makes sense financially.

    So she is graduating with tons of student debt and it just isn’t worth it.

    https://twitter.com/WallStreetSilv/status/1727485327541928274

    I thought State college was cheaper, and am not sure what a masters in curriculum does. And teacher salaries should have some market mechanism behind them… Also she could probably start an onlyfans

    • Suthenboy

      Heard this song before. Groceries and overall price of living is sooooooo high.
      Yeah? Whod’ya vote for?

      • AlexinCT

        WHAT?

        You mean that there are consequences for being a dumbass and making sutpid choices?

    • AlexinCT

      This is Exhibit A of why government needs to be out of the student loan business and colleges should be held liable for programs tat cost so much and deliver shit in earning potential.

    • Fourscore

      While it may not be haha funny it’s typical of the quality of teachers. It’s like 3/4s of the teachers are in the bottom half of their class.

    • Raven Nation

      The Masters degree wouldn’t have much content, but most school districts bump salaries if you have a graduate degree.

      • Mojeaux

        Not quite the whole story. If you expect to STAY employed, getting higher and higher degrees is practically mandatory.

      • Raven Nation

        Is that true for basic teaching jobs – I did not realize that.

        Here most of the graduate degrees in education are geared at those wanting to go into admin.

      • Mojeaux

        As of maybe 1991 or thereabouts, when I began my short-lived high school English teacher journey, I was paired with a lovely cooperating teacher doing AP English and yearbook. She’d been teaching 22 years and was perpetually angry because she was being pushed out of teaching into admin or her job was on the line. Now, she LOVED teaching and she LOVED her students, but she would not be allowed to stay “just” a teacher.

        Anyway, she was given student teachers so she had built-in subs for when she had to go to her graduate classes and attend administration meetings. (Once, I showed her a dream lesson plan I’d come up with, and she said she loved it, but I’d never be allowed to teach it.)

        This was not including her beef with parents whose angels could do no wrong.

        She told me if I loved teaching to get out now, while the getting was good. I saw her life and decided to take her advice.

    • Don escaped Texas

      She got a bachelors and masters degree in teaching … and is making about $16 per hour.

      I ain’t reading that shit, but, stipulating to the basic stupidity of the wider situation, I gotta say: McDonald’s pays $16, so this chick must have done none of the normal things to get the normal pub ed scam job, because you can’t swing a dead cat without hitting some useless person who makes at least $50k in some sort of “educational” job

      • Ted S.

        There’s nothing to read: it’s a fucking embedded video.

      • juris imprudent

        Well, if she is working 50-60 hrs/wk and that nets out $16/hr, she’s bringing in between $3400 to $4000 a month, in a state with no income tax.

      • Don escaped Texas

        I don’t need any help with maths

        but will gladly concede full props with a side of humble apologies to anyone, even fucking grifters, who put in an honest 60 hours 50 time a year

      • juris imprudent

        Teaching doesn’t mean 50 weeks a year! If they teach summer school, that is additional income.

      • Fourscore

        Add in a coaching gig or Yearbook or any other of the many club things that pass for education

    • Timeloose

      She is not considering the 3 months of PTO. 2 hours or more a day for prep and grading, that sound excessive. Also most schools if not all have prep periods where you can do all of the things that she mentions as being done during OT.

    • Pine_Tree

      Yeah, never even occurred to her to do the math.

      But for ever step along the way, she was told how smart she was, and what a high-achiever she was.

      • juris imprudent

        If she could do math she wouldn’t be teaching it.

    • Derpetologist

      Mathnasium pays its tutors $17/hour. I charged $20/hour as a private tutor. The high school math teacher job I briefly had in Florida paid $23/hour plus bennies.

      I have a degree in chemical engineering and got a perfect score on the ASVAB. It’s safe to say I’m overqualified for any math education job. I’ve forgotten more math than 99% of people are ever going to know. The complaining woman above can cry me a river. I’ll be cracking open another beer.

      Love, peace, and chicken grease. Sic transit gloria mundi.

  26. Sean

    I played https://squaredle.com/xp 11/23:
    *23/23 words (+3 bonus words)
    🎯 Perfect accuracy

    I played https://squaredle.com 11/23:
    54/54 words (+22 bonus words)
    📖 In the top 3% by bonus words

  27. creech

    As Americans, whether or not we chose to be one, we have much to be thankful for. Let’s try to remember why as we go through our feasts and family get togethers. Yet we know “times have changed” and I suspect Glibs can easily list ten reasons why. I was struck by this morning’s long editorial in the local birdcage liner. A school superintendent thanked the school cops for their role in the education process. She did acknowledge that those of us of a certain age would have no memories of such worthy staff members. “Times change” she says, but provides no insights on why. And I find that typical – no introspection as to why things are what they are. No asking why persistent poverty exists in much of the world, or why certain cultures demand death for non believers, or how sending armed federal agents to gather your neighbors resources is incompatible with how one wishes to be personally treated. Let us be thankful we can still open our mouths about such things and go forth and do so.

    • Don escaped Texas

      I’m told Bobby Bowden would reflect that when he was in school the biggest problem was chewing gum being stuck under the furniture

  28. Mojeaux

    Mornin’, Gliberoonies.

    The extent of my cooking today involves rolling out some sugar cookie dough, cutting them into turkey-leg-shaped pieces, and baking them. https://ibb.co/c6ZvbyN I made the buttercream yesterday, and I managed not to eat all the Sixlets.

    My gratitude for things waxes and wanes, but the one thing, I realized the other day, that keeps my marriage afloat is my gratitude for my husband putting up with me.

    • PieInTheSky

      Sugar is bad for you.

      • Mojeaux

        Yes. Yes, it is.

    • Fourscore

      Marriages last when the parties involved figure out they couldn’t do any better.

      /50 years in a few months (on the second time around)

      • kinnath

        47 and counting for us

      • R C Dean

        Some of us know we couldn’t. I, for one, am married to a woman who mistakenly believes she couldn’t.

        I’m certainly not going to tell her.

      • Ghostpatzer

        Only 29 here. I was wise repulsive enough to wait til I turned 41 before tying the knot.

    • Suthenboy

      Heh. In-group languages that convey no information to those outside the group are essentially indistinguishable from gibberish.

      • Derpetologist

        Shaw famously wrote that “all professions are conspiracies against the laity”.

        Closed-form solutions are rare, many algorithms do not converge, and simple questions of pure mathematics go unanswered for thousands of years.

        Game over. Insert coin and try again.

  29. PieInTheSky

    Oh yeah… Happy American holiday Americans.

    • Sean

      🦃🥧🍷

  30. The Late P Brooks

    Milei is a doctrinaire Hayekian seemingly grown in a secret laboratory funded by the Koch brothers, with the editorial staff of Reason, the extremist libertarian magazine in Washington, serving as the scientists.

    Thanks. I needed a hearty laugh.

  31. prolefeed

    If you define “extremist libertarian” as a conglomeration of liberals and some very small l libertarians maybe.

    • Don escaped Texas

      Reason is like everyone else: they want freedom for the things they want, and they want to destroy the rights of others to do things they don’t want

      I’ve met maybe three people in my entire life who don’t fit this

      I don’t care what you do; just leave me and my shit TF alone

      • Suthenboy

        *Looks in mirror*
        I wonder who the other two are

  32. R.J.

    Giant turkey is done after 5 1/2 hours. Looks fantastic . Ham is warming on the grill outside as others are using my kitchen now.

    • PieInTheSky

      did you sous vide the breast?

      • R.J.

        No. Thawed it over 2 days, then cooked it whole first breast down, then breast up. Covered in butter, salt and pepper. Stuffed with sage, rosemary and thyme. It was 24 pounds before cooking.
        Ham is heating well.
        I shall eat extra for my Romanian homie who could not be here.

  33. The Late P Brooks

    Headline from MSNBC Business Channel:

    “Far right anti-Islam candidate clinches shock Dutch election win. Here’s what comes next.”

    What comes next? They round up all the Islamists and load them on tramp steamers bound for Morocco, to be traded for the finest hashish.

    • Don escaped Texas

      True or naw?

      fuck that state either way

      I am in complete favor of NY being NY and CA being CA as hard and as loud as they know how

      the rest of America needs to see that shit in high def

      ** polishes TN’s consistent ranking in the top ten freest states **

      • R C Dean

        The problem being all the splash damage on everyone else, though. When markets that size outlaw something, for example, it makes it uneconomical for many manufacturers to make it, so nobody gets it. In this interconnected economy, when CA passes a stupid law, companies all over the country who do any business in CA have to follow it.

      • Don escaped Texas

        sure

        you might also observe that they pick my presidents for me

        I’ve been downwind of those folk for many decades. A century or so ago my clans did our part to get out of the deal with them, but we got shot down and burned down for our trouble. Me and mine are left with the old point and laugh, cautionary tale stuff.

    • R.J.

      Your link. Eet ees broken.

      • Ted S.

        All I got was Yet Another Embedded Video.

      • Derpetologist

        A woman complains about a NY law that allows the state to isolate people if they are infected with a highly contagious disease.

        For me, that law would not even be in my top 100 reasons to not live within the city, county, or state of NY.

    • Tres Cool

      Something about her eyes is very off-putting to me.

    • Suthenboy

      Fuuuuuuck you Jebra. You lot made it, now lie in it. Dont bring your shit here. We dont want it. You and your ilk are not welcome here.

      • Mojeaux

        Why do you assume she voted for the people who push these policies? If her moniker and rant are to go by, she didn’t vote for these policies.

        Sometimes people are stuck where they are and have to bear the bad voting decisions of others.

    • Ghostpatzer

      The Appellate Division panel of judges asserted that the plaintiffs, several current and former New York State legislators and a citizen’s group, did not have legal standing to sue the State, arguing that none of the plaintiffs had sustained personal injury as a result of the regulation.

      There it is again, “Did not have legal standing”. I guess we need to wait for someone to be seized and incarcerated before taking legal action. Sounds legit.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    What type of art do you call this?

    P T Barnum could tell you.

  35. Derpetologist

    Hello friends.

    I’m thankful. A wise man once said: the flag still stands for freedom, and they can’t take that away.

    Please enjoy this clip of the Pinky and the Brain voice actors reading lines from Pulp Fiction:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ze5kE2coe0

    I bought a turkey/cheese/cracker snack pack yesterday, but I ate it all before midnight. Today I’ll eat bread and fish.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    What a lovely white Thanksgiving we’re having.

    • R.J.

      Beautiful. It’s clear and 50s today in TX.

  37. LCDR_Fish

    Eesh…just finished a 5k turkey trot near Myrtle Beach (NC side). Warm enough for short sleeves but my lungs were not adjusted for running outside at that pace this year.

  38. The Late P Brooks

    More stories about the guy terrorizing the Moslem food cart.

    I thought being an obnoxious loudmouth asshole was a time honored New York tradition.

    • R.J.

      Awesome. Do the stories mention his political leanings, or is that already omitted?

  39. The Late P Brooks

    United States of Hate

    “Based on evidence collected — including journal writings from the attacker, Benjamin Charles Jones — the attack may have been at least partially inspired by racially motivated violent extremist (RMVE) ideology,” the FBI said in a statement Wednesday. “The FBI will continue to investigate the motivating factors leading to this attack.”

    The four victims were a white woman, a white man and two Black women, the agency said.

    You really hit the big time, kid.

    • R.J.

      The white people just got in the way?

      • R C Dean

        Or the black people. Don’t know enough to say.

    • creech

      Why should they “investigate the motivating factors?” Didn’t the posting of Bin Ladin’s “motivating factors” just create a firestorm?
      Everyone asks “why” but when presented with “why” they want it swept under the rug (if the “why” could possibly trigger some discussion and changes of policy or culture).

      • R C Dean

        I’ll say it: bin Laden had some legitimate gripes about the U.S. No matter how legitimate your gripes, though, you don’t kill 3,000+ ordinary citizens.

      • Don escaped Texas

        legitimate gripes

        I don’t find it unusual that somehow some hundred or million or hundred million folk somewhere out there are militantly opposed to just about every single thing that others on the planet have done.

        I’m not happy about 9/11, but I’m not surprised. Like October 7, I don’t think it has any value to argue about it….as if anyone on any side is going to change their minds about what standards should be or who the good guys are in the timeless race and land wars that dominate history.

        But, if I were the little guy in an asymmetric struggle, I’d try to stick to killing 3,000 ordinary citizens in uniform. Crashing into the Pentagon and blowing up a barracks full of marines at least seem like attacks on legitimate representatives and targets.

      • Lackadaisical

        …and he got the exact opposite of what he wanted. Even more US intervention in the ME because of him.

  40. Old Man With Candy

    So last night, I saw something charming. Tomb Raider and I were out for a walk here in Brooklyn. We were both a bit hungry, so we stopped at one of the numerous pizza-by-the-slice places. There was one table outside, and a couple was sitting there having their slices and a drink. A black kid, maybe 12, was at the window getting some slices. She was $3 short and was trying to figure out how to juggle things so she could at least have something to eat. The people at the table immediately handed her $3.

    • Sensei

      That’s the NYC I really do like.

      (Plus that’s like what a $1 from a few years ago.)

      • Suthenboy

        I gotta say…someone glues themselves to something to grind everyone else’s efforts to a halt I am just going to yank them loose.
        Lose some skin? Fuck you, I dont care. Get the fuck out of the way.

      • Chafed

        I like the cut of your jib.

      • Not Adahn

        Demonstrators were also seen in the middle of the parade carrying a banner that read, “Genocide then. Genocide Now.”

        At least they’re admitting they want a shoah 2.0

    • Derpetologist

      “How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a weary world.”

      -an eccentric chocolatier quoting the female protagonist in a famous writer’s play about a greedy Jew

  41. Drake

    The Kiss concert got cancelled so the couple decided to act out Detroit Rock City complete with the crash at the end? That is dedication.

    • R.J.

      Hoist on his own petard. Make stupid laws, pay stupid prices.

      • juris imprudent

        That was only supposed to apply to TRUMP!!!

      • Ted S.

        And the Catholic Church.

      • Ted S.

        Was he in the state legislature when that law was passed?

    • Drake

      I’m sure there used to be a statute of limitations on this nonsense.

    • Ghostpatzer

      Cry me a river. This is the clown who was gung-ho about NYC becoming a sanctuary city, until he found out it was making the city even brankrupter. And is now blaming the feds for this and demanding more money.

  42. The Late P Brooks

    Everybody do the Moral Panic, ch 3,000,000

    Teenage girls in the U.S. who are increasingly being targeted or threatened with fake nude photos created with artificial intelligence or other tools have limited ways to seek accountability or recourse, as schools and state legislatures struggle to catch up to the new technologies, according to legislators, legal experts and one victim who is now advocating for a federal bill.

    Since the 2023 school year kicked into session, cases involving teen girls victimized by the fake nude photos, also known as deepfakes, have proliferated worldwide, including at high schools in New Jersey and Washington state.

    Local police departments are investigating the incidents, lawmakers are racing to enact new measures that would enforce punishments against the photos’ creators, and affected families are pushing for answers and solutions.

    Unrealistic deepfakes can be made with simple photo-editing tools that have existed for years. But two school districts told NBC News that they believe fake photos of teens that have affected their students were AI-generated.

    “And one victim who is now advocating for a federal bill.” Of course she is, because “professional victim” is a highly respected and lucrative occupation in 21st century America.

    And, of course, AI is involved, because that makes everything more sexxxy.

    • Suthenboy

      It does? The AI stuff I have seen is all instant boner-killer material.

  43. DEG

    Happy Thanksgiving!

    An Iowan pleasured himself outside a Kum & Go store and then departed for his nearby apartment, according to an indecent exposure complaint filed following his arrest yesterday.

    According to cops, victims called 911 to report that an “unknown male had said sexual things to them and began masturbating in their presence” while outside the convenience store in Iowa City.

    Who is missing?

    • Tres Cool

      I mean, with a name like that he was just following directions.

  44. The Late P Brooks

    Apps that purport to “undress” clothed photos have also been identified as possible tools used in some cases and have been found available for free on app stores. These modern deepfakes can be more realistic-looking and harder to immediately identify as fake.

    “I didn’t know how complex and scary AI technology is,” said Francesca Mani, 15, a sophomore at New Jersey’s Westfield High School, where more than 30 girls learned on Oct. 20 that they may have been depicted in explicit, AI-manipulated images.

    “I was shocked because me and the other girls were betrayed by our classmates,” she said, “which means it could happen to anyone by anyone.”

    Just wait ’til they put your head on a pig.

  45. Derpetologist

    Maybe if drugs fall out of your ass, a fly goes in to replace it.

    On an unrelated note, why come the Flintstones can train dinosaurs to lift rocks, but not to pull wagons? A bicycle would work better than Fred’s car.

    • Don escaped Texas

      I read somewhere that Santa knows who’s been naught or nice, but he didn’t do shit about Rudolph being kept out of the reindeer games and that was right under his nose

      like being shot with a 12gauge in the movies will fling you backwards 30 feet and through a plate glass window whilst the shootist gets a mere bump to the shoulder

      • Derpetologist

        I have my own final verses for the Rudolph carol:

        ♫ The moral of the story
        Is that being different’s bad
        Unless your defect’s useful
        Man, this story’s really sad!

      • R.J.

        SANTA JUDGES ALL.
        WHO JUDGES THE JUDGES?

      • Derpetologist

        I’m surprised you haven’t done a movie post on Santa’s Slay or Santa Jaws.

        Santa Jaws is amusing. It has a Santa hat on its dorsal fin, a candy cane horn, and teeth made from xmas tree lights. Xmas music signals its approach much like the 2-note cello theme for Bruce.

      • R.J.

        Hmmm…I am listening,,,,

      • Mojeaux

        It’s best just to not revisit good childhood memories so I don’t watch these anymore. Even ‘Twas the night before Christmas has a vengeful Santa, and the story itself is just cry-worthy.

      • Derpetologist

        The Nightmare Before Christmas is an xmas and Halloween movie.

        And it kept Hot Topic in business til Invader Zim came around.

    • Fourscore

      Flintstones was a cartoon, not real, AFAIK

  46. The Late P Brooks

    “The FBI takes crimes against children seriously and works to investigate the facts of each allegation in a collective effort with our state, local, and tribal law enforcement partners,” the agency said, adding that victims can face significant challenges when trying to stop the spread of the image or get it removed from the internet.

    “We have the largest and best collection of child pornography in the universe.”

  47. Lackadaisical

    So, we’ve had a billing dispute with a dentist we went to for my son, they are saying they’re going to make it right, this is what they sent:

    “We have the records and the new statement ready as per our telephone conversation on November 17, 2023. We tried to refund the credit card, however it was rejected. We are going to send a check from the bank that is going to need verification that it is in your possession prior to cashing the check due to security reasons.

    My accounting department needs to confirm your physical mailing address that will require a signature in order to have proof that you received the documents.

    The documents will be sent next week due to the holidays. Thank you for your understanding and patience.”

    Do you think its legit? I guess I am almost worried they’re going to serve me legal papers and are trying to make sure they serve us.

    • Derpetologist

      Call them. Cock a pistol next to the phone speaker. Hang up. Find another dentist.

      • Lackadaisical

        Instructions unclear, I have an appointment on Monday.

      • Derpetologist

        You’re worried about them serving you legal papers, and you plan on going to their office? Can’t they just verify your address then?

        In that case, as soon as you enter, move your index finger rapidly over your lips while hitting yourself on the head with a mallet Looney Tunes style.

      • Lackadaisical

        XD

        You weren’t supposed to take that seriously… and I’m not sure if you are Derpy.

        We haven’t been to their office in over a year and don’t plan to go.

    • Sensei

      Yes. You could be served something this way as well.

      It’s sounds extreme to me. How much are we talking about here?

      • Lackadaisical

        I’m saying they owe us $2,000, they were saying we owe them $2,000, so… $4k swing depending who wins out?

      • Sensei

        The HSA is the confounding issue.

        You are going to have to put that money back and they made need to do something special to get it to you.

        I’d probably roll the dice. It’s not like they can’t get your address and send you a certified letter without your help.

      • Lackadaisical

        Exactly what I’m thinking.

    • Gender Traitor

      I’m trying to imagine under what circumstances a credit card issuer would reject a refund. A call to them wouldn’t hurt.

      • Sensei

        I assumed expired card or changed number.

      • Lackadaisical

        I think it was my HSA card? It was also over a year ago…

  48. The Late P Brooks

    Wallow in guilt and shame

    For most American families, Thanksgiving is a simple time. In an era where a mere 50 percent of immediate families eat dinner together, Thanksgiving is the one date where multigenerational extended families and friends come under one roof and celebrate their blessings. Often, differences in faith and politics take a backseat to food, family, and football. It is a tradition that I do not think we should lose, especially in these challenging times.

    And yet, truth should triumph over nationalistic narratives. And the truth about Thanksgiving should be learned by all Americans, as it is a part of our complicated history of savage betrayal and removal of indigenous people and the colonization of their land.

    ——-

    Even today, using the 1619 Point Comfort landing that preceded the Mayflower is still oddly controversial. Thanksgiving also effectively downplays Native resistance and makes the Pilgrims’ voyage about freedom and not imperialist settler colonialism. For the next century, the story of Thanksgiving would make the Pilgrims and other British colonists seem kind and willing to live in peace. Natives, meanwhile, were framed in novels and films as brutal and aggressive, unjustly collecting the scalps of white men.

    To be sure, most Americans would prefer not to be hectored by some pompous asshole, but it’s for their own good.

    • B.P.

      This guy has another piece in Newsweek titled: “Democrats: Stop Shopping. Biden’s Our Guy—and the Best President of My Life”

  49. Ghostpatzer

    That teacher is pretty dumb. 4.0 GPA? Summer of 2021, the 20 yo Youngest Patzer earned $20/hr teaching programming online to elementary school kids. Glorified babysitting, but still…

  50. Sensei

    An October report by the Texas Public Policy Foundation found that, after accounting for all of the hidden costs involved in owning an EV, that price becomes much more significant than an internal combustion engine (ICE) vehicle.

    Adding in the costs of government subsidies, charging equipment and the added strain on the electric grid, the report says that the “true cost of fueling an EV would equate to an EV owner paying $17.33 per gallon of gasoline.”

    https://www.thestreet.com/electric-vehicles/electric-vehicle-tesla-adoption-curve-cost

    There is a link to the study from TX in the article.

    • Ted S.

      No shit, Sherlock!

    • Don escaped Texas

      $17.33 per gallon

      Chevron and Exxon are never wrong about this things, nor are their lackeys.

      Not that I’m an EV shill: I could have proved it was $30/gallon and only charged them $2,000,000 for my research

      • Sensei

        You and me both.

        But why I’ve no issue using the same math “hacks” the greens do to make a competing study.

        I made good money doing just that for investors on Wall Street.

      • R.J.

        That was for the comment below. The world is doomed.

    • Ghostpatzer

      Social media algorithm: “it’s from TX, therefore fake news. Hide it, and suspend the account of anyone who shares it.”

      • Don escaped Texas

        algorithm has cognitive dissonance ground fault and burns down:

        “it’s from Austin, therefore a new Gospel”

  51. The Late P Brooks

    Adding in the costs of government subsidies, charging equipment and the added strain on the electric grid, the report says that the “true cost of fueling an EV would equate to an EV owner paying $17.33 per gallon of gasoline.”

    Signalling your virtuous love for the planet- priceless.

    • Don escaped Texas

      miles of wire, acres of solar cells, huge holes where the copper and tellurium were mined, and piles of dead birds under windmills are all morally superior to salt burns, it is known