“They’ve indicted my son,” Joe said. “My son.” His eyes filled with thick tears that spilled over his stretched-tight lower eyelids and snaked down his face like a wacky wall-walker.
“I’m sorry I’m the one that had to tell you, Mr. President,” Karine said, shuffling her feet on the rug. “We’ll get him the best lawyers possible.”
“Maybe it’s time the boy tasted some consequences, Joe,” Dr. Biden said. “Jail might be best for him.”
“He can’t go to jill, Jail. He’s my only boy since the Taliban killed Beau,” Joe said, shaking.
“It might be good for the campaign, Joe,” Kamala said. “They have jailed my son, my son! You can campaign on that,” she said as she struggled to light the Oval Office menorah.
“Everyone just hold on,” Finnegan said. She crossed to behind Joe and checked behind the curtains and the long-suffering ficus, and pulled up the trap door to make sure Hunter wasn’t waiting to spring out. “OK… I also think it’s time for him to see some punishment.”
“I can’t believe you would throw your own father under the bus like that,” Kamala said. “For does not the Talmud tell us that ‘So it ain’t forgotten, hope I don’t spoil the nigga rotten, if taught him right, if not he like ask heavenly father, help me raise my shorty right?”
“What da fuck?” Karine asked, sass bubbling out of her like a science fair volcano.
“Anti-semite!” Kamala spat at her.
“You are about as Jewish as a pulled pork sandwich!” Karine said, pulling off her earrings.
“A-a-a-a pulled pork sandwich sounds pretty good, right now,” Joe said. “When is lunch?”
“About 20 hours from now,” Dr. Biden said.
“I want a rabbi brought in immediately!” Kamala demanded. “I won’t have this, this goyim lesbisplaining my religion to me!”
“I went to Hebrew school for nine years,” Joe said proudly. “I love pork.”
Hunter came sliding into the Oval Office in sock feet, his jockstrap inked with a crude American flag. “Second Amendment, bitches!” he sang.
“The Second Amendment only applies to muskets,” Karine yelped as her implant hit her with an electric shock.
Hunter smiled at her, $70,000 in dental work chipped and gray. He moved in for a grinding hug. She stiff-armed him into Joe’s desk.
“I’ve stopped drinking, Hunter,” she said, the whites of her eyes a piss-yellow. “Don’t even try it.”
“You won’t want to eat seafood for every meal,” Hunter said. He snapped his jock straps and did a sloppy pirouette.
“You need more rehab!” Dr. Biden said, digging in her purse for her prescription pad.
“What you’ve been charged with is a perfectly reasonable restriction on gun rights. And, furthermore…” Finnegan paused and her face went dead. “You know what, I’m not doing this today.” She walked out of the Oval Office. Dr. Biden called her name and followed her.
“Coward,” Kamala sniffed. “Reformed Reformed Judaism tells us, ‘Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and tricks.”
Hunter sat down on the desk and fingered the tabs of flesh behind each of Joe’s ears tenderly. Joe woke up and smiled.
“My boy,” he said, his face spasmodically twitching.
“Karine, we shouldn’t fight,” Kamala said, “We’ve got Black Girl Magic!”
“OK, sure,” Karine said tiredly.
Kamala cackled in delight. “Do you want to help me light the Kwanzaukkah candle?”
It’s a Kwanzkuha miracle!
Kwanzaa traditions are quite ancient, dating back nearly one thousand years!
A rich tradition created by convicted felon Ron Karenga in 1966 to create division between black people and white people celebrating Christmas.
I can’t believe anyone takes the fraud seriously.
I’m guessing you didn’t watch the video. The joke is that it’s Futurama, which is set 1,000 years in the future. And
Black SantaKwanzaa-bot doesn’t even know what everything means.You’re right, I just saw “kwanzaa” and reacted. I’ve seen the Futurama bit though, pretty funny.
Not as ancient as future Christmas past from the future
Huh. Eugene Peterson did a translation of the Talmud?
*“He can’t go to jill, Jail. He’s my only boy since the Taliban killed Beau,” Joe said, shaking.*
Verisimilitude for the win. I can hear old potato head stammer that out in a press conference, before finishing the mangled sentence with a mumbled ‘whatever’.
Followed by ‘Republicans pounce’ on grieving Joe.
Frenetic.
sass bubbling out of her like a science fair volcano.
*pause for laughter*
That one got me also.
#metoo
Dammit! I’ve forgotten what the implant is supposed to be preventing.
And I’m usually pretty good with the H&HJMC lore.
I don’t recall the implant before this. It sounds like she was being shocked for not making with the musket line quickly enough.
I thought it was related to the ongoing foreplay between her and Hunter.
“You are about as Jewish as a pulled pork sandwich!”
I can just see Blackberry twerking and rapping ‘Boom bitch, get out da way. Get out da way, bitch, get out da way”
I might have watched way too many Steve Inman videos.
“It might be good for the campaign, Joe,” Kamala said. “They have jailed my son, my son! You can campaign on that,” she said as she struggled to light the Oval Office menorah.
Yes! Joe can portray himself as being in a mortal struggle against the Deep State for the soul and essence of democracy.
Interesting plan. Steal Trump’s thunder by claiming the Deep State is after all politicians. Convince a bunch of stupid people this is true. After he wins, fire one low level flunky, then business as usual.
Joe’s grief over the GOP’s attack on Hunter will be the excuse why he is too distraut to get out of his basement and campaign.
Why would he need to campaign anyway?
I love the trap door. Old-school theatre craft.
~Hunter smiled at her, $70,000 in dental work chipped and gray. He moved in for a grinding hug. She stiff-armed him into Joe’s desk.~
Ah, young romance, when blood runs hot and passions deep.
“You need more rehab!” Dr. Biden said, digging in her purse for her prescription pad.
*chef’s kiss*
“For does not the Talmud tell us that ‘So it ain’t forgotten, hope I don’t spoil the nigga rotten, if taught him right, if not he like ask heavenly father, help me raise my shorty right?”
Holy shit, that had me laughing like a lunatic in my office. I had to close my door so people wouldn’t think I had gone insane!
I lol’d while somebody was walking past too. Kamala quoting the Talmid is pure awesomeness.
“I’ve stopped drinking, Hunter,” she said
Too bad. One of her few
endearinghuman qualities.This one is funny as hell.
long-suffering ficus
SF, your contributions are a lot more serious than what we’re watching unfold in DC. It really is a comedy, some guy in a sweat shirt shows up, asks for 60B, leaves with a promise of sofa cushion change of 100 M. Biden Junior lays on the floor, kicking his feet and says “I ain’t gonna talk to no damned congressmen and you can’t make me”.
Meanwhile the latest new arrivals keep on swimming across the river and the admin says they are breaking our laws and if they keep on doing it they’re going to get in real trouble.
The decline came really quickly, didn’t it?
/must resist linking obvious song
“Gradually, then suddenly.”
We’re definitely in suddenly.
The opening section on Tim Dillon”s latest on old Hunter was good.
that being said as a libertarian I cannot help admiring a man who blew more that 1 million on drugs hookers and booze
I am team Hunter
He’s easily the most likeable member of that horrible family.
I almost feel a little sorry for Hunter, forced to be a bagman for his corrupt family.
“forced”
If he was slightly smarter, he would have no charges or anything and any besmirching of him would be part of Hillary’s “vast right-wing conspiracy”.
Unfortunately for him, he’s the dumb son who got stuck with the job when his brother
was killed by the Talibandied of cancer.Well, the Taliban IS a cancer, so PPP is totes right on this!
/DNC
I hope Hunter wins his 2nd amendment case. And, I hope he rots in prison on the taxes.
Same.
To clarify, income taxes are evil, but currently are constitutional.
That one bothers me because taxes are immoral, and I can’t root for jailtime for not paying them.
Equal protection under that law goes with equal punishment under the law.
I’m all for removing income tax from the constitution and gutting the tax base of the federal government.
Until that time occurs, Hunter goes to prison for breaking the laws we all live under and for being too stupid to hire competent lawyers to avoid (not evade) that tax system.
I read in one article he had the signed checks and tax returns in the trunk of his car. He just decided for whatever reason not to send them in.
What is it with Dems constantly finding ballots, documents, files, etc. in the trunks of their cars?
That’s why they want everyone to move to electric vehicles! No one will think to look in the front trunks!
Any outside corroboration that those weren’t merely backdated and then “found”?
Do you have any proof that they were? Huh?
Because that’s how evidentiary rules work now, for Dems.
As I recall, again fuzzy memory, his ex-wife was complaining that the he didn’t send them in and it impacted her as well.
She was unhappy with him.
He had told her that he couldn’t give her money because of an unexpected tax payment he had just made. *
*He never made such a payment.
“unexpected tax payment”
I know today that I will be paying taxes in a month or three. While the amount is unknown the expectations are there.
Based on Bruen, since there is no 18th century history and tradition of denying firearms to drug users, Hunter should win the gun case.
He probably won’t, because FYTW.
Is the charge possession or lying on a form? I don’t see hoe Bruen would stop the latter.
Lying on the form, which an honest answer would disqualify him from purchasing and owning a firearm, which has no basis in history. Of course the forms and permits have no basis in history either, but here we are,
Both I believe. Video evidence of possession of a pistol while using drugs. His book clearly states he was using drugs long before he bought the pistol. So lying on the forms is also a slam dunk.
Wait until some judge rules that since he was on drugs, he can’t be held responsible for what he put on the form.
Two separate crimes, because one could theoretically buy a gun legally and then start using drugs at a later date which would only bring the possession charge into play.
Some or all of the form itself could violate Bruen depending on what restrictions can be shown to be historical. Thus the form could be stripped down to just those constitutional restrictions and be legal under Bruen. As it stand today, some of the questions on the form clearly are not valid under Bruen.
So what would be the questions you’d leave?
Are you planning to buy a gun?
YES
NO
Who would file if not intending to buy?
SCOTUS is currently working on the case where a person with a domestic violence charge was prohibited from getting a gun before he was convicted of a crime.
Oral arguments were held recently.
2nd Amendment friendly lawyers say it looks like SCOTUS will carve out “exclusions for a history of violence” as being OK under Bruen.
This would mean that questions in the form regarding arrest records, and maybe involuntary commitments, may be deemed as constitutionally acceptable.
Personally, I disagree. I would go with actual convictions of violent crimes. But SCOTUS does not look to be leaning that way.
I bet even convictions, once released from prison, would not be a historical bar to possession.
The historical basis rule is just as stupid and arbitrary as penumbras and emanations. The plain text reading should be deciding but scotus is too afraid of what that would actually entail for 2A, 1A, and every other constitutional question.
Are you planning to buy a gun?
YES
NO
DECLINE TO ANSWER
I bet even convictions, once released from prison, would not be a historical bar to possession.
Correct.
That thought passed through my brain mere moments after I pushed the submit button. 😉
I would go with actual convictions of violent crimes. But SCOTUS does not look to be leaning that way.
That’s better, but I’m not a fan of any restrictions. If someone released from prison is too dangerous to buy a gun, then they shouldn’t be released back into society (or really should be put down, but that’s a whole other discussion).
Are you buying this gun for yourself?
1. Yes
2. No
2a. This gun kills fascists
2b. It’s for my cousin
2c. I mean yes!
3. KILLKILLKILLKILL
The first question is whether or not there is any reason the state can take away your gun or prevent you from buying.
If the answer is no, then the form should not exist.
If the answer is yes, the form should limited to only that purpose.
Gorilla GF-10: Lightweight Hunting Semiauto in 8.6mm Blackout
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1Dbo_Uol_0
two things: real calibers are in mm. And that does not look like something a civilian should own. The Second Amendment only applies to muskets. And cannons on sail ships.
Civilians should be more heavily armed than the Military and Police combined.
You know any time something is in a wacky fractional mm measurement, it’s because they’re converting from inches, right?
“Gorilla GF-10: Lightweight Hunting Semiauto in 8.6mm Blackout”
Ceaușescu could have used one of those on his record-setting bear hunts.
But I thought they were for hunting Gorillas.
1 in 3 twist! Like shooting a power drill.
“Reformed Reformed Judaism tells us, ‘Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and tricks.” – word
When I read someone cry “my son!” in despair, I hear this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZD6Oyj_Z0NA
was thinking this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9g9XeRMZM0
Also, there’s this.
“And the king was much moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept: and as he went, thus he said, O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! would God I had died for thee, O Absalom, my son, my son!”
Thanks SF!
The contrast between exclusionary institutions in MA and PA couldn’t be more stark.
Penn faculty fear the donor who started the effort to oust Liz Magill is attempting to set the agenda for trustees
In an email to trustees Tuesday morning titled “Moving Forward,” Marc Rowan, CEO of private equity firm Apollo Global Management in New York, attached a list of 18 questions, some with five parts. Among the questions, he asked whether the school should look at eliminating some academic departments — though he didn’t name which — and examine “criteria for qualification for membership in the faculty,” citing a provision in the charter that allows trustees to set general policies around admission to the faculty…
“It’s menacing,” said Harun Küçük, former director of Penn’s Middle East Center and associate professor of history and sociology of science. “They’ll turn this into something other than a university.”
The board proxy battle has finally come for elite higher ed. I’m just kicking back with the popcorn because if it’s even possible to detoxify higher education it is going to take decades.
“It’s menacing,” said Harun Küçük,
Good. Those smug, self-important shitweasels should feel some concern over consequences for their actions.
I can’t think of any class of people who deserve more to be menaced.
today in ypoutube shows pie US real estate
26± ACRES with a stunning FARMHOUSE and GUEST HOME. Whether a private generational compound, working farm, full-time residence, vacation retreat, or income-generating rental, withdraw to this scenic mountaintop retreat with breathtaking views and 4-acre stocked lake for fishing and canoeing. Comfortable and bright main home boasts vaulted ceilings, open main floor plan, and full basement, taking full advantage of the spacious design. The landscape is invited indoors through floor-to-ceiling windows, hardwood floors, and stacked-stone wood-burning fireplace. Step out onto your porch and breathe in the fresh air while enjoying breathtaking views of the land, lake, and wildlife ranging from deer to turkey to ducks. This manageable-sized East TN residence is the ”X” On The Map for your farm dreams: bring the HORSES, goats, chickens, and plant the vegetable garden in and around the fully-fenced pastures! Stargaze over a crackling bonfire to the soundtrack of summer cicadas. Utilize this retreat for your personal enjoyment or as a rental for visitors to the area. Work from home with fiber optics internet and enjoy Tennessee’s NO STATE INCOME TAX status.
Sewanee, TN, is home to charming shops, dining, arts, natural outdoor attractions, and acclaimed UNIVERSITY OF THE SOUTH ”Sewanee”–a world-class liberal arts college. Explore Middle Tennessee: 6 minutes to Franklin Forest with over 8,000± acres of hiking and horse trails. 40 minutes to Tims Ford Lake. 15 minutes to I-24. Easy 1 hour drive to Chattanooga. 1.5 hours to Nashville. 3 hours to Atlanta. Schedule your private tour today!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjtqrsxwsAY
$1.3M
https://toddhenon.com/idx/mls-1382343-452_tate_rd_sewanee_tn_37375
that’d get you a 1,500 sq. ft. condo here.
26 acres is a lot of land to maintain though, a condo is lower stress
Sounds like it’s still a farm, so you’d be expecting a return on that investment.
Alternatively, you could let it go fallow and just maintain the area around the buildings – if you like field mice and snakes.
I’m a tree farmer, takes a long time to bring in a crop. In the meantime I’ll leave it to the wildlife.
Snakes will solve the mice problem.
I mentioned the snakes because the mice attract them. If you have enough snakes to actually solve the mouse problem – you’ve got a serious snake problem.
Relevant.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06mMD797xqY
It’s an excuse to have border collies. And then you need sheep to keep them occupied.
Unless it’s formal gardens, 26 acres isn’t that much to do with equipment. All by hand, sure.
^This. It takes me about 10 hours/once a year to bush hog 15ish acres. Maybe another 10 hours/year to maintain the hiking trails and stocked fish pond. 15ish acres of forest requires zero upkeep.
Keeping the couple acres around my house mowed is many times over more labor intensive then all of the rest combined.
Also, $1.3 mil is insane.
Really? Sounds about right for that house and lot to me.
Prices for everything is insane.
But, navigation lights on a canoe?
It might be more about letting other people see you. In that case, a small boat like that could benefit if the lake has enough traffic.
I think I have just the place for you Pie.
Photos: Ohio House With Secret Nightclub and Stripclub Stage Gets Massive Price Cut
Zanesville is nice as long as you stay away from any of the places where people are.
Or anywhere else in Ohio.
Sounds nice.
that pond looks like mosquito-ville.
Perfection!
Kamala cackled in delight. “Do you want to help me light the Kwanzaukkah candle?”
These euphemisms.
Before me, it was believed that the most Firsts the human body could possibly produce in a day was 3.
I quadruple that on a bad day and eat seconds like you for breakfast.
Guy tries to open gun range in rural CA. Predictability ensues.
https://krcrtv.com/news/local/residents-file-lawsuit-against-absurd-gun-range-project-on-millville-plains
Darn. I guess the default approved option then is the hand grenade range. Shouldn’t have complained.
I would actually think rural california — which is consistently solid red — would have no problem w/ people opening gun ranges.
Even in the countryside, Californians are grouchy NIMBYs. I don’t miss the place. It is reaping what is sows, which is nothing, since people file a lawsuit if you plant anything.
This is not what Seasons 1-3 of Sons of Anarchy taught me.
I’m amazed that Peggy Bundy wasn’t cancelled from Futurama for singing a cover of “Strange Fruit.”
I enjoy a good cult leader resume.
https://gccalliance.org/resume
An applicant coming into an interview has an extensive section of her resume dedicated to her hypnosis career.
I just sent that to my boss, since we are hiring right now. He’d be perfect.
Why is hypertelorism so common in younger people?
https://twitter.com/Muttly_One/status/1734820798123176353
I agree with the defense.
https://nypost.com/2023/12/13/news/thieves-wanted-deal-on-charges-as-stolen-items-were-on-sale/
The value lost by the store should be the amount they would have received from a sale. Reminds me of the gazillion drug seizures.
You are right. Equal application of the law. You cannot overstate drug value during busts, or when prosecuting for shoplifting. Even when it is a pair of hideous thugs who deserve it.