INT-DAY-METRO CITY METROPOLITAN NEWS OFFICE-DAY
Margo and Peerless stand before the desk of editor Larry Dwight. Orbit Boy is frail, emaciated and bruised, barely hanging onto life. Margo instinctively ducks when Orbit Boy approaches.
LARRY
While you two were out…out playing paddy-cake at the jazz club, a serious story broke!
PEERLESS
What’s the story chief?
LARRY
I was just getting to that, you nincompoop!
MARGO
Don’t tell us Dr. Lobo is running Amok again?!
LARRY
No, Dr. Lobo is still locked up safe and sound after he tried to over-throw the government with that insane plan to issue government money based on merit and logic. No, this is an epidemic! A gun epidemic! Guns are running rampant through the streets!
PEERLESS
An epidemic? You mean it’s a disease?
MARGO
Well, only a diseased mind could think anyone but government officials should have guns.
LARRY
Well put Margo. The guns are out there on the streets causing chaos. Taking the lives of young children.
PEERLESS
But, guns are inanimate objects. Somebody must be using them.
LARRY
Of course, of course. But if the guns weren’t there then people wouldn’t be using them. Ergo, it’s the gun’s fault. See, simple logic.
PEERLESS
I suppose that makes some sort of sense. But, who IS it that is using the guns?
LARRY
Some bunch of man children calling themselves The Bullet Boys. But that’s neither here nor there. I want you to focus on the guns, that’s the important part of the story. Tell the readers how scary guns are and show them that it is only right and proper that only the government have guns.
MARGO
We’ll get right on it chief.
PEERLESS
Wait a second, you mean you’re telling how to report the story before we’ve even investigated it?
LARRY
This is the news business Peerless, not the detective business! Now get out out of my office!
PEERLESS and MARGO walk towards the door. Peerless turns and speaks to himself.
PEERLESS
I think Gravity Man should look into these Bullet Boys.
MARGO
What was that?
PEERLESS
Oh..uh..nothing…
FADE OUT
INT.-BULLET BOYS HEADQUARTERS-DAY
The four Bullet Boys all wear leather jumpsuits and helmets shaped like bullets. They are standing around preparing their Tommy guns for action.
BB1
So word from the Langley is we go out, cause mayhem with these here Tommy Guns and yell out right wing propaganda.
BB2
What sort of propaganda?
BB1
I don’t know? Something about negros or something.
BB3
But that’s not really right wing, it’s just racist.
BB1
Yeah, racist like right wingers.
BB3
But, that says nothing about the basis of right wing philosophy, I mean anyone can be racist.
BB4
No, only right right wingers can be racist, that’s whole point.
BB3
Wait, can you guys even define right wing?
BB1
Yeah, like BB4 just said, racism.
JUST THEN GRAVITY MAN SMASHES through the wall. Chunks of concrete pummel Orbit Boy.
GRAVITY MAN
What are you foul fiends facilitating!
BB1
It’s Gravity Man! Let the lead loose boys!
The Bullet Boys grab their guns and open fire. Gravity Man grabs poor Orbit Boy and uses him as a shield.
GRAVITY MAN
Ha! Bullets are no match for the power of Gravity Itself!
When the bullet boys have exhausted their ammunition Gravity Man takes Orbit Boy and throws him at the Bullet Boys. BB1 gets hit in the head and knocked out. Orbit Boy returns to Gravity Man as BB2 and BB4 charge, pulling out knives. Gravity Man hurls Orbit Boy, hitting BB2 in the left knee, an audible CRACK.
BB2
My leg, you broke my leg.
Orbit Boy begins to bounce back to Gravity Man, smashing into the back of BB4’s head. BB4 falls face first onto the floor, another audible CRACK. He lies motionless. As Orbit Boy returns to Gravity Man BB3 escapes through the door.
BB3
I don’t want no part of this! I’m resigning from the FBI!
Gravity Man surveys the scene and squeezes orbit between his hands so they face eachother.
GRAVITY MAN
Good work old chum! We defeated the Bullet Boys!
ORBIT BOY’s now lifeless face stares back at Gravity Man. Gravity Man shakes THE BODY.
GRAVITY MAN
Orbit Boy! Wake up Orbit Boy!
Gravity Man again shakes THE BODY, the head flopping back and forth, an audible CRACK. When Gravity man stops shaking THE BODY the head falls limply back. Gravity Man releases THE BODY and it resumes orbit as Gravity Man drops to his knees and sobs.
GRAVITY MAN
Why did it have to be bullets! His only weakness!
HARD CUT TO
INT-METRO CITY METROPOLITAN-DAY
The News paper headline reads “GRAVITY MAN DEFEATS BULLET BOYS, GUNS STILL ON THE LOOSE”. The camera pulls back from the paper laying on Peerless’ desk as Peerless sits in his chair and Margo stands in front of the desk. THE BODY still orbits, knocking into random things. Limp and lifeless.
MARGO
That story is number one, with a bullet.
PEERLESS
Now is not the time for puns, Margo.
MARGO
Why, I never! What are you implying you imp!?
PEERLESS
Oh, nothing. Just thinking.
MARGO
Well, if you’re going to be down in the dumps, I might as well…Hey, Cousin Buddy how about we go out and paint the town tonight?
THE BODY passes by, a limp hand flops and hits Margo on the ass.
MARGO
Mighty forward Cousin Buddy. I’ll take that as a yes. Pick me up around seven.
Margo leaves. We watch a depressed Peerless and THE BODY limply orbiting for a few seconds before the announcer cuts in.
ANNOUNCER
Wowee gang, that sure was a close one! Remember, if you ever find a gun in your house, don’t touch it. Guns aren’t toys. Leave the gun where it is and report your parents for child endangerment. Well, that does it for this season of The Adventures of Gravity Man. See you all next season for all new all thrilling adventures!
FADE TO BLACK
Poor Orbit Boy. Starved and then shot to death. Will he come back a zombie?
Firster Man would kick Gravity Man’s ass two ways to Sunday. Can you dig it?
Its a shame you’re so L7, Herbert.
I can dig it.
He can dig it.
She can dig it.
Can you dig it?
Herbert!
Herbert!
Herbert!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PvqDkPhD3jU&pp=ygURU3RhciB0cmVrIGhpcHBpZXM%3D
Is it time for the Glibertariat to take an evening nap together or something?
Well, my First would have roused them into post, but you went and fucked that up. And for what, RJ? For what?
i spent weeks charting that First with the Third Eye, but sometimes, mistakes happen. I will have to go back to the drawing board.
It was a lost hour. You can reclaim it. Bigger and better.
I need to talk to CPRM’s supervisor.
You need to talk to as good psychologist.
Yea, but at least I’m not a Brown’s fan.
You don’t have the fortitude to be a Browns fan.
Do you remember the Brandon Weeden era, Hype? I do.
How about the Mangenius era?
You could say that I’ve been in your life for the entirety of it. Silently there. Mocking you.
Thanks CPRM
Does this mean no Gravity Man adventures for awhile?
It was becoming current, with the guns running amok.
Almost every day I have a mosquito fly across in front of my monitor. Often I am able to kill them, I’m not sure where they come from but I think they’re in the furnace wood I bring in about every day. They don’t seem to be interested in biting, just want to annoy me. It’s price I pay for living in the woods, I guess.
Only female mosquitoes suck blood. You must have a bunch of incel mosquitoes.
Last spring was the worst infestation that I can remember. Must have been all females, lasted about 6 weeks but with the drought all the standing water must have dried ’cause the bugs disappeared. Few deer flies or ticks. No snow this year (yet) so maybe we’ll get a reprieve again.
They aren’t even kidding when they say this in real life.
Are we not the government? As such we all could have them, if we wanted.
I think that is partly the reason the military have trouble recruiting. I f a draft is ever re-instituted and fewer have been exposed to guns effective training may take longer. At this point I’m doubting if a draft would be successful, fortunately.
fewer have been exposed to guns effective training may take longer
Less bad habits to break.
Huh. I am surprised nobody is in the zooms.
It’s a work night for me. Transcription is light, but I have a ginormous ebook project.
Whahappen is here now too!
Met him.
He seems to be a solid dude.
I assume you mean you met me on the zooms
Met him on both the zooms and in real life. whahappan is a solid dude.
whahappen???
Gravity Man Sentinels? Really trying to keep the franchise going…
While driving, I feel the makings of an epic rant but once home I simply no longer care. And that’s not the booze talking either.
“Ah, fuck it” is perfectly acceptable.
Well, I have the setup done, and most of the article written. When I get the last piece, I can run the tests and include the results in the write-up.
It’s already a chunky article at 3k words before pictures.
The Why Files goes over the….troubled and interesting history of men who have tried to develop alternatives to fossil fuels/free or cheap energy sources. It’s far more interesting than the Clinton Body Count.
People like to assign conspiracies to anything that looks suspicious, then again there’s a lot of money in energy and people also like to protect whatever it is that makes them money. I wonder how many of those guys had financial issues and took care of themselves or shady investors and were taken care of by them.
*golf clap*
Poor Orbit Boy.
Good morning Glibs!
🌄❄😱
The news can’t stop talking about potential snow fall this weekend. 🙄
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=n95eekfFZZg
🎶🎶
Fantastic song, but the video has a long lead in. Worth it though.
VDOT to pre-treat I-95 in Fredericksburg, Va. area Thursday
They will lay down a heavy coat. The precipitation won’t arrive. The roads will be white until we do get enough.
After all the snow hype I’m expecting the ‘storm’ to be mostly rain with little snow.
Morning Regular, Diet, and Caffiene-Free Glibs.
Adaptation day. One hand, glad it isn’t 3-4am that I have to do them like in Vegas. On the other hand, that means I have to work around air traffic operations to make it operational.
Morning all
How goes?
Morning. Think I left my RaspPi in Vegas. Didn’t run across it while unpacking and it isn’t at work. *Grumbles*
😨
On another note there is a study currently occurring in the FAA on the use of “reply all” to what I would guess was an inadvertent email group created or used in which all IT asset owners are receiving emails from someone that was just looking for the process to turn in said asset.
My favorites are the ones replying all while complaining people are replying all.
Study? Internal, or outside consultants? Will the results be published in a scholarly journal? Tax dollars at work?
The report will be compiled, filed, and no one will read it.
Personal study of watching my email inbox fill up with stupidity.
Personal study of watching my email inbox fill up with stupidity.
We solved that issue by conducting all our intetnal correspondence via Slack. Now i spend sevetal hours per day trying to renember which of the 50 Slack channels have threads i care about. Given the slow but steady deterioration of my memory this is not a good thing.
Ouch. Can it be recovered?
Never mind. What’s left in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Oh, well.
We still own the home in Vegas. Or I left it at my old shop, which either can be retrieved!
Mornin,, repribates!
Good morning, ‘patzie, U, OBE, Beau, Roat, and Sean!
… and Stinky!
Or reprobates, even. You too, UCS.
Morning.
You left out the reprabates. I am hurt.
And preprobates.
And just plain rebates.
Whole lotta ‘batin going on this morning.
Giggity.
We have a watered down version of an OSHA inspection that we do every year. Among the complaints from technicians was the ‘wishy washy application of the rules’ and they all just shrug. No if we are going to be held to a standard and there are references to the rules, inspectors don’t get to make shit up.
For instance: Fire extinguishers. They are saying that someone said that all of them will be removed from unmanned sites. I said “Did they provide the OSHA reference to allow that? Because we can only enhance OSHA regulations, not diminish them”
Their response “Well you know how it is, next year someone will say something different”.
I didn’t want to volunteer, but I am OSHA trained and I don’t like inspectors that are supposed to hold us to standards that are either lazy or just incompetent. Not that I like some of the regulations, but this is fire safety when we are out in the field.
I particularly liked:
Morning Everyone!
When I get up and look in the mirror , damn, it’s good to see a reflection. I’m as surprised as you
Good morning, 4(20)! One more day without becoming a vampire! 😃👍
Mirror, mirror, on the wall…
Mornin’!