Senecaâs Letters from a Stoic
If you have anger issues, this one is a great tool (h/t mindyourbusiness)
This weekâs book:
Discourses and Selected Writings
Disclaimer: Iâm not your Supervisor. These are my opinions after reading through these books a few times.
Epictetus was born a slave around 50 ad. His owner was Epaphroditus, a rich freedman who was once a slave of Nero. Though he was a slave Epictetus was sent to study philosophy under Musonius Rufus.
Epictetus was lame and there are some stories it was caused by his master and others that it was caused by disease.
He was a freedman when all philosophers were banished from Rome in 89 by the Emperor Domitian. He then started his school in Greece, and had many students. He did not leave any writings from his lessons, but one of his students, Flavius Arrian, took notes and wrote the Discourses.
Epictetus did not marry, had no children, and lived to be around 80-85. In retirement, he adopted a child that would have been abandoned and raised him with a woman.
He died sometime around AD 135.
He might be my favorite Stoic teacher. I love his bare bones and very straight forward approach.
Following is a paragraph-by-paragraph discussion of one of his lessons. Epictetusâs text appears in bold, my replies are in normal text.
Of inconsistency Part I
Some of their faults men readily admit, but others not so readily. Now no one will admit that he is foolish or unintelligent, but, quite the contrary, you hear everyone say, “I wish I had as much luck as I have sense.” But they readily admit that they are timid, and say, “I am a bit timid, I admit; but in general you will not find me to be a fool” A man will not readily admit that he is incontinent, not at all that he is unjust, and will never admit that he is envious or meddlesome; but most men will admit that they are moved by pity.
It is hard to admit fault, but easy to say “things just didn’t work out”. I know many people that have gotten into bad situations because of stupid, greedy, or lustful decisions and none of them seem to believe that the cause was actually them. If they do know it, they don’t admit it. I look back and I know I have screwed up a few things but haven’t had any long-term consequences result.
What is the reason for this? The principal reason is confusion of thought and an unwillingness to admit a fault in matters which involve good and evil; but, apart from that, different people are affected by different motives, and, as a rule, they will never admit anything that they conceive to be disgraceful;
Good and evil are simple concepts at their cores, but it is easy to get lost and make justifications when you aren’t sure which is which. If I stick to seeing the simpler sides and keeping it to what I can control then it is harder to get lost and feel like I need to make excuses.
5timidity, for example, they conceive to be an indication of a prudent disposition, and the same is true of pity, but stupidity they conceive to be a slave’s quality altogether; also, they will never plead guilty to offences against society.
Timidity can be a sign of prudence, or it can be a sign of cowardice, depending on the particular circumstances.
Now in the case of most errors, the principal reason why men are inclined to admit them is because they conceive that there is an involuntary element in them, as, for instance, in timidity and pity. And if a man ever does, grudgingly, admit that he is incontinent, he adds that he is in love, expecting to be excused as for an involuntary act.
I have seen this particular stupidity all too often. People don’t see that if you are in love and do something evil because of it, you still are doing evil. Destroying a family because you “fell in love” is still destroying a family.
But injustice they do not at all conceive of as involuntary. In jealousy there is also, as they fancy, an element of the involuntary, and therefore this too is a fault which men grudgingly admit.
I am not a jealous person, my wife has many friends that she goes to see and and I don’t control her free time. That being said, if I ever did find out she cheated, I honestly don’t know how I would react. I don’t envision ever having to face this situation and it would be my version of hell if I did.
When such are the men we live amongâso confused, so ignorant both of what they mean by “evil” and what evil quality they have, or whether they have one, or, if so, how they come to have it, or how they will get rid of itâamong such men I wonder whether it is not worth while for us also to watch ourselves, each one asking himself the questions: “Is it possible that I too am one of these people? What conceit am I cherishing regarding myself? How do I conduct myself? Do I for my part act like a wise man? Do I for my part act like a man of self-control? Do I for my part ever say that I have been educated to meet whatever comes?Â
I try to conduct myself wisely and not fall into easily being manipulated, I keep pretty good self-control of myself with the exception of my diet, I drink too much sometimes and eat too much junk food.
10Have I the consciousness, proper to a man who knows nothing, that I do know nothing? Do I go to my teacher, like one who goes to consult an oracle, prepared to obey? Or do I, too, like a sniffling child, go to school to learn only the history of philosophy and to understand the books which I did not understand before, and, if chance offers, to explain them to others?”
I am still learning from Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, Musonius Rufus, Seneca, and others. I am doing this for my own sanity and hoping to help someone else with living a freer life with Stoicism. I am definitely not doing it to impress others with my knowledge.
Part II will be next week.
I am once again travelling for work this week and will be flying home from Pensacola on Friday. I went to Houston Monday, drove to New Orleans Tuesday, and then drove through a monsoon to Pensacola on Wednesday. Looking forward to getting home.
I heard Beyonce’s “country ” song in one of the offices this week. I thought it was god-awful. If you like Beyonce, it might be OK, but that ain’t country. To me it sounded like she was making fun of country. Out of morbid curiosity I listened to how she redid Jolene from a girl boss perspective. Not a fan of that one either.
So here are some of my favorite “real” country songs.
The original Jolene.
He has Firsted.
He is First.
He will First.
With the Three Eyes, he shall do all three at once.
Congratulations?
We live in an indulgent society where people are celebrated for being selfish pricks who put their own wants and needs ahead of their family’s.
I feel alone in not having sympathy for the closeted gay who left his family to be himself. Or for people who have kids who divorce and tell themselves its better for their kids to grow up with two happier parents than see them stay together and be unhappy. Yes, there are extreme situations where divorce is obviously warranted. But wanting to indulge like a child ad convincing yourself that it’s better for your children for you to be happy isn’t one of them.
You are not alone.
The Mr. Beast guy who left his wife and kid to become a lady-man, how is that better than the guy who leaves his family for the young secretary? But there are plenty of people who celebrate this.
I’m not sure if you’re saying I’m okay with this as opposed to a gay dude…
I don’t think he was saying that, just bringing up another similar example. That’s how I read it, at least.
It didn’t read to me as though that was his intent. I read it more along the lines as “both are abandonment of responsibiltiies towards one’s family deserving of similar condemnations”, as we see less condemnation by internet randos of the “decides to depart the role of a straight man” behavior than “chasing the younger woman” behavior. I did not see it as targeted at your personal opinion of anything
Though that was just my read.
I read it the same way as Moj. I think that if it had begun with “Or,” I would have read it as an extention rather than a contradiction.
If I had been clearer then it would not have sparked this further discussion.
Apologies, CPA. I misread.
No worries!
Or, they are both different types of dirtbags?
Yes, but one will get you praised in certain circles.
One of my buddies did the “younger woman” thing to his wife.
Fuck that guy.
Garrison Keillor in his one-man show talked up his own bravery in dropping his wives for younger models. ‘Cuz, he had the courage to try and find happiness instead of settling for a comfortable existence, plus he had to suffer the scorn of his ex-friends and society that just couldn’t understand!
I used to like him until I went to that show.
‘Being yourself’ is almost always a false face plastered on extremely narcissistic behavior.
Lucky for me, being myself is incredibly easy.
Sometimes though myself is a fat bastard.
How long should one stay in a shitty, loveless marriage? Does a kid make it better, or worse? Should the child suffer through living with two people who are miserable?
Should a woman stay with a boozer, someone that can’t hold a job, is a tyrant towards his own kids? Not no but hell no.!
A man with kids and a wife druggie? C’mon, there are lots of reasons that a divorce is the solution. We are not the pope, we are fallible. How about the guy that procreates randomly and walks away?
The mentally ill that are all over the cities of America…
Chess candidates update at the halfway point. Today is 2nd rest day.
After 7 rounds:
Nepomniachtchi 4.5
Gukesh, Caruana, Pragg 4
Nakamura, Vidit 3.5
Firouzja 2.5
Abasov 2
This is Nepo’s 3rd Candidates, he won the last 2. 14 rounds per tournament, that is 35 rounds he has played so far. At the end of rounds, he has been leading or tied for leading in 35 of the 35 rounds.
He is a fast starter in tournaments but has a tendency to fall apart after a big loss. That is what happened in his World Championship match with Ding 2 years ago.
It couldn’t have started yesterday. Nakamura had a huge clock advantage in a weird unbalanced position, but Nepo played perfectly and forced a draw. If he had lost, it could have been the beginning of the end. Instead, he has to be the clear favorite to win. Again.
It could have started yesterday, is what I meant to say.
Also, sorry for going OT too early, but today is my 10th anniversary and this was the most time slot I had to post in.
Typing hard. But at least it wasnt a FIRST post.
Hey, tenth is much better than first! I will be at 19th this Oct. One of my proudest achievements.
but today is my 10th anniversary
Congrats
Congrats
Hope you guys enjoy the day
Happy Anniversary! đ
“I know many people that have gotten into bad situations because of stupid, greedy, or lustful decisions and none of them seem to believe that the cause was actually them. ”
I am living with this right now. The Mrs. has a cousin who’s been living in one of our spare bedrooms. I knew she was flighty, but seeing it up close has been an eye opener. Constantly switching jobs, careers, projects, guys. Always looking for the quick win and bailing when things get hard. Never getting ahead and blaming it on bad luck. Ugh.
….Would?
No. Not a 10, but decently attractive which does not balance out the aforementioned issues with life choices IMO.
Wouldn’t, not even if she looks like a 25-year-old Mia Sorvino with a private shooting range and a latex fetish. Living with someone like that is like living with a serial arsonist. You know they’re gonna fuck up your life, it’s just a question of, ‘When?’ and ‘How badly?’
Sorry, ToK. I hope this gets resolved some way that doesn’t hurt too badly.
Yabut… 25 year old Mira Sorvino.
She probably also has an equally hot and bad-decision-making friend so threesomes would also be inevitable.
She has a weirdly shaped head. Iâd risk it for 22 year old Natalie Portman though.
Mira Sorvino knowingly torpedoed her career telling Weinstein to pound sand, so she is a badass in my book. I think she is the bomb.
She turned him down? But he was such a studâŠ
Her dad was no help?
I never got the impression he had that much pull in Hollywood. He was a lowly actor. Weinstein was more powerful.
Yes, but he was scary.
Really? I did not know that. If anything, now she’s even hotter in my book.
Thanks. We do keep her at arm’s length enough that we’re not loaning her money or anything like that.
I don’t think I could put up with that, but I get the draw of trying to help out family. Tough love is tough for a reason.
Her mom and step dad lived with us for a year when he was recovering from a car accident. They were wonderful. Super helpful and fun to be around, and we miss them. This is different. We are rapidly running out of patience.
Pics?
Sounds like a nightmare.
I always wonder how people like that never stop and realize the common denominator in their “bad luck” is their decisions.
Hope you don’t get too involved.
For some reason I’ve been in everything bad that’s ever happened to me.
(Admittednly meant as a joke, since I’m not so oblivious to the difference between ‘consequences of my decisions’ and ‘bad luck’)
Dysfunction
I love that website
I’ve got a friend who’s in the same kind of a situation. Mostly self inflicted, but never their fault.
I think I’ve gotten my actual work responsibilities caught up. The stuff that is open is on other people’s desks, so unless I want to start pestering them on a friday afternoon… I’m done for the week.
Andrew Heaton is one of the few reasons (LOL) that I pay any attention the stuff TOS puts out.
2:51 is one of the all-time great sighs.
That was wonderful.
While discussing how much the government sucks, Congress failed to pass the amendment to require a warrant for FISA.
215-215.
I’ve already sent a hate tweet at my duplicitous congress-critter for voting along with the Dread Pirate McCain.
Where were the other five?
86 Rs voted against and 84? Ds voted for.
Watching that, I’m reminded again how Biden is just terrible at politics. He should just keep his mouth shut. With shrinkflation, some people won’t really notice. But ban the changes to packaging, and they’ll just raise the price, which is very obvious and will give people more reason to blame Biden.
I am sitting in the Atlanta airport. This place is a madhouse.
Married couple across from me are just being cold to each other.
If my wife and I acted like that, I would be questioning my life choices.
They are both about my age (50’s) so I would guess they’ve been together awhile.
I’ve noticed that some people just fall into being accustomed to a circumstance. They may not even like each other any more, but they are so used to the way things are, thoughts of change never cross their minds.
Married couple across from me are just being cold to each other.
I’ve heard people comment before . . . “I saw an older couple in the restaurant eating a meal and they weren’t talking to each other. So, sad”.
When you’ve been together 48 years, there actually aren’t a lot of fresh topics left to talk about.
It’s not that they weren’t talking, it was the attitude they talked to each other with.
After 30 years of marriage my wife and I aren’t always chatterboxes, but we are always nice to each other.
it was the attitude they talked to each other with.
Could be a failing relationship. Or it could just be a bad day.
Doesn’t being in the Atlanta airport make it a bad day by definition?
OK, I’ll stop ragging on the Atlanta airport (never having been there.) Maybe.
Any couple that can survive travelling together (flying in particular) has at least some minimally functional relationship going.
Or he might be a wise man, who knows his wife is in a bad mood and he knows not to make it worse.
Some days, opening your mouth is all it takes.
I’m so very, very sorry.
You hear a muted voice from the speaker above
It says âhead on down to the tarmac.â
Iâm sitting in the Atlanta airport
Hoping for a clean getaway
Hoping to board sometime today
Well, it depends…
I feel as if I’m lucky to be in a job situation where if I screw up – most likely because I forgot to do something or it otherwise slipped through the cracks – I can go to my boss and admit, “I screwed up.” I trust that he wouldn’t lose his temper, and he would never throw me under the bus to his “higher ups” (our CEO or the Board.) He would hold me responsible for my goof, but he would do so privately, and if he had to bring it to the attention of anyone else, he would likely say, “I should have caught that.”
I have to admit when I screw up, it doesn’t happen often, but since I decided what kind of man I wanted to be when I was 20 or so that was my only option.
I honestly don’t know how to lie about things like that.
It really grinds my gears when situations devolve into finger pointing because nobody wants to admit they screwed up.
I’ll have respect for the person who owns up to doing something that caused an outage. The assholes who try to cover it up, and say the “didn’t do nothing!” when there’s logging showing them making changes get put on the “avoid at all costs” list.
Nearly all of us older IT people have stories about making a mistake that took down a process/job/location due to a mistake. We laugh about it now, but there are few things as orifice clenching as the realization “Wait… did I just click on the wrong button?” while watching tickets start rolling in and e-mails/texts/calls start up.
I’m fairly sure I built my reputation on “I don’t know” and “I’m afraid I did that”. And it wasn’t a reputation as a screwup know-nothing.
eyeballs the firewall he accidentally booted into factory default configuration instead of running configuration after an out-of-band upgrade last week…
Nearly all of us older IT people have stories about making a mistake that took down a process/job/location due to a mistake.
I let loose the magic smoke on a $10k piece of telecom equipment my first month on my first real job. Plugged in a power supply with a barrel connector that fit, but I didn’t check the specs. That was a fun conversation with the boss.
My favorite for that was a while back. The company had remote offices, and part of the processing was getting uploads from a machine in those remote offices. We learned over time that if there was a power outage, that would cause issues. As most of the remote offices were in…well… remote locations, they would have frequent power interruptions. So it was decided to order a batch of UPS to send out to these remote offices and have them plug in the computer, router, and modem into them.
First couple of test offices went off without a hitch. Problem solved!
The the second wave (much larger) of UPS were sent out to offices, we started getting reports of magic smoke leaving the computers (which were old terminals for a mainframe based system), routers, and modems. There was much questioning, and lots of doubt. Someone finally had the bright idea to look at the boxes for the UPS that were being shipped out in the second wave. They were European models…
I only did that with a cheap desktop. Took it into the datacenter to connect directly to some hardware, forgot that the rack rails were 220V
(-.-)
That’s what it means to be a manager, GT. Your boss knows how to handle people
There are drugs for that…
He is using the second definition:
in·con·ti·nent
/inËkĂ€nt(É)nÉnt,iNGËkĂ€nt(É)nÉnt/
adjective
1. having no or insufficient voluntary control over urination or defecation.
“elderly, incontinent parents”
2. lacking self-restraint; uncontrolled.
OMG I didn’t even think to look it up! Well done, Ron!
Well, there are drugs for that too… đ
Vyvanse is out of stock everywhere. I’m having to re-learn all my ADHD coping skills and pound the caffeine to stay awake.
I haven’t heard Beyonce’s cover of “Jolene” (nor any of her other country songs,) but apparently Dolly has expressed approval. Dolly being Dolly, though, I suspect she would say so even if she felt differently because as far as I can tell, Dolly is genuinely kind and classy. I also hope Dolly is making big money off the song, as last I knew, she NEVER gives up her songs’ “publishing” rights (royalties,) which she has said in the past were for her nieces’ and nephews’ education (and almost certainly a subsequent generation by now.)
I’ve never heard either iteration of the work (synopsis didn’t appeal to me), but I did read a review which was not kind to the recent version.
White Stripes covered it too. (Who hasn’t by now?)
BeyoncĂ© more than covered it though, she changed the lyrics/meaning of the song. I don’t think I care that much, but appropriating art and then making it your own was I thought frowned upon.
Wasn’t yesterday that someone linked the original “Mighty Good Man” that got transformed by TLC?
En Vogue. TLC did “No Scrubs,” which is an AWESOME song.
I haven’t heard the BeyoncĂ© version, and I don’t much care for her music, but I didn’t like the original to begin with. Don’t like Dollyâs voice that much, either, although I think sheâs a sweetheart.
HOWEVER, I don’t have a problem with taking a song and making it your own as long as the original artist gets paid what they’re supposed to get paid for whatever was sampled.
I don’t see it as much different from a woman covering a man’s song and changing the pronouns. See: “You Belong to Me” (Michael McDonald/Carly Simon).
I like weird Al’s approach. he would always get the artist’s permission before parodying a song.
I believe she got Dolly’s permission/blessing first.
I saw a (turned out to be fake) meme that had Reba trashing the song. I mean, she might have, but I was skeptical so I went looking. Reba didn’t say much either way. Dolly expressed approval, yes, but she also performed a “rock” song when she was inducted into the rock’n’roll hall of fame that was ⊠not rock. I think Dolly’s pretty much on board with anything other people want to do creatively.
Jolene.
That version is boring.
First one I found.
I had no idea John Cage did a cover.
On the warpath
In a statement, Lakota Peopleâs Law Project director Chase Iron Eyes said, âItâs not acceptable for Kristi Noem to lie repeatedly, stoke further division, and endanger the people of the sovereign nations which pre-exist the United States and South Dakota, which have illegally annexed and occupied sovereign territory of the Oceti Sakowin. Noem is now prohibited from entering sovereign territory of Sioux bands and is subject to detention and/or removal if she violates banishment orders, meaning the stateâs governor is barred from entering more than 10 percent of all land her state claims is within its âborders.ââ Standing Rock Sioux Tribe chairwoman Janet Alkire called Noemâs remarks âwild and irresponsible,â adding: âRather than make uninformed and unsubstantiated claims, Noem should work with tribal leaders to increase funding and resources for tribal law enforcement and education.â
Sovereignty is hard. Like math.
I havenât heard Beyonceâs cover of âJoleneâ (nor any of her other country songs,) but apparently Dolly has expressed approval.
I don’t know who perpetrates it, but I have heard a version of Jolene in which it sounds as if the singer is trying to hack up a nine pound hairball. It can’t be worse than that one.
Are you referring to this version?
It’s such good base material that it can survive being punk’d.
Billy and the Boingers?
https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/bloomcounty/images/3/38/Billy_and_the_Boingers.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20200516214008
It doesn’t look like Billy on my PC. đ
?
http://www.defunkd.com/public/upload/images/product_images/big/mvtgjunkie_15611330292232.JPG
That’s better! Thank you! đ
Somewhere in my t-shirt archives I have a very worn out “Billy and the Boingers” shirt and this one too.
Surprisingly enough, to me anyway, you can still get Deathtongue merch:
https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/532214-death-tongue
I think Imma get me a coffee mug.
I have that t-shirt!
Thereâs a bardcore cover:
https://youtu.be/ugqQlB5fpuc?si=d_TfnJg69-JZe1NN
That’s cool! đ
Time for my flight, talk to you all later.
Safe travels!
That’s not it, Neph. I think it was some ’90s female popster. I have blotted it from my memory as best i can.
Thanks for this Ron. It’s been so busy I can’t read it until Saturday. I appreciate it, just don’t get to comment timely.
Cavalcade of cliches
In a New York hotel room, acclaimed war photographer Lee (Kirsten Dunst) watches the countryâs president (Nick Offerman) proclaim, not very convincingly, that a great government victory over the secessionist Western Forces campaign led by California and Texas is on the horizon. Outside, explosions boom, and as she lies in a bathtub, her face in her hands, Lee recalls some of the numerous unforgettable examples of manâs cruelty from her globe-trotting career. What once was distant and foreign, however, is now commonplace at home, as is reinforced when she and her journalist partner Joel (Wagner Moura) cover a city event that turns fatal, and which compels Lee to instinctively save the life of Jessie (Cailee Spaeny), an aspiring photojournalist whose naivete is a grave threat to her safety.
In a reporter-inundated lobby, Lee and Joel are cajoled by colleague Sammy (Stephen McKinley Henderson) into confessing the nature of their next mission: They plan to travel to Washington, D.C., to attempt to interview the commander-in-chief before heâs unceremoniously deposed by the gaining-traction insurrectionists. Sammy tells them that this means certain death, since the destabilized government is killing visitors on sight (including journalists, who are viewed as collaborators). Nonetheless, he too is enticed by the promise of such an unparalleled scoop, and he persuades them to let him join their party. This rankles Lee, whose jadedness knows no bounds, and on the morning of their departure, sheâs further angered by Joelâs decision to allow Jessie (an avowed Lee fan) to also tag along, thus adding a babysitting element to their already perilous journey.
Fabulous.
Sounds like a fairly compelling comedy.
Hi-jinks ensue!
House passed FISA with no new requirements:
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/house-passes-fisa-renewal-without-added-warrant-mandate-for-us-data/ar-BB1lwMSm
We ainât voting our way out of this folks.
The deciding vote was the speaker, who was always against this until the intel community took him into a secret room for an hour. So yes.
Johnson is a sack of shit.
They are all sacks of shit.
Such a meeting should end with a couple of dead intel community members on the meeting room floor from “natural causes”
Shot themselves in the back of the head, three times each, after beating the crap out of themselves? Seems perfectly natural to me…
Because Philadelphia is a no-go zone, Lee and company embark on a circuitous route that takes them to the capital by way of Pittsburgh, West Virginia, and the âfront linesâ of Charlottesville. That cityâs key role in this story is one of many instancesâlike the revelation that Offermanâs leader is in his third term and has dissolved the FBIâin which Civil War alludes to today without drawing direct comparisons. Nonetheless, the specter of a forthcoming Trumpian takeover and the bedlam it might inspire is everywhere in Garlandâs film, and the subtlety with which the writer/director evokes connections between his make-believe nightmare and a possible real-life one lends the material its haunting terror. So too does the authenticity with which he stages his action; from a showdown with a sniper to an all-out battle in the streets of D.C., the proceedings present a disturbingly recognizable world in which everythingâpeople, structures, dreams, ambitions, and loyaltiesâis fragile, and constantly at the mercy of explosive, uncontrollable forces.
Will there be psychotherapists on standby in the lobby to treat audience members traumatized into a state of catatonia by this harrowing preview of a second Trump administration?
https://www.wsj.com/arts-culture/film/civil-war-review-alex-garland-kirsten-dunst-nick-offerman-dystopia-f88f8a9a?st=b44dya2wn2ejq09&reflink=desktopwebshare_permalink
I thought “bedlam” was racist against the cray-cray.
U.S. Moves Warships to Defend Israel in Case of Iranian Attack
What could possibly go wrong?
https://www.wsj.com/world/middle-east/iranian-attack-expected-on-israel-in-next-two-days-42b0537c?st=7bx61zekchomwb9&reflink=desktopwebshare_permalink
Well, I remember being taught how WW2 ended the Great Depression, so maybe we need WW3 to end the Great Shrinkflation?
Grrrr.
Mom’s TV died. I ordered her one. It got lost. Ordered her a different one, it got delayed but arrived. Damaged. Ordered a THIRD one, let’s see how that works.
Semi on topic with cheap TVs.
https://www.thestreet.com/technology/roku-is-planning-a-change-users-wont-like
Well hey, who doesnât just love ads? Especially the ones that utilize real time content consumption analysis to sell you bullshit.
Both of mine are almost 12 years old each. Been pondering replacing at least one.