About The Author

CPRM

CPRM

Organic troll farmer.

96 Comments

  1. Yusef drives a Kia

    Space!
    Love it….

  2. Sean

    Road trip…to space!

    *Points to avatar*

  3. R.J.

    I love space hat. And USA hat. This is one of my favorite episodes.

    • R.J.

      IN SPACE!

  4. R.J.

    It’s kind of psychedelic if you roll over the Hat and Hair picture on the front page. Hat keeps changing color. Dull, bright. Dull, bright. I am enjoying this odd glitch.

  5. juris imprudent

    Can’t wait for his impassioned speech from the dock: you can’t do this to me, don’t you all know who I am?!?!

    • Brochettaward

      HE’S AN ARTIST.

      That’s what you mean, right?

  6. kinnath

    P i i i i i i i i g s

    I i i i i i i i n

    Sp a a a a a a a a a a a a a ce!

  7. KK, Plump & Unfiltered

    The Hangover meets Primary Colors?

    • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

      (for the buddy road trip, I mean)

    • Not Adahn

      I thought it was Yusuf’s Kia?

  8. cavalier973

    On the dead thread, someone mentioned the Rekieta Law thing. Viva Frei and Robert Barnes had a show yesterday where they went over all the 4th and 5th amendment violations that were done to arrest Nick.

    He was arrested, apparently, on third-hand information gathered by a cop that Nick had been criticizing. The warrant was signed by a judge that Nick had been criticizing. The person that reported to the cop was Nick’s pastor, who was feeling agitation that Nick would get up and leave church during his sermons. There was supposedly a video of Nick getting up from a livestream to use the bathroom, then returned 45 minutes later with white powder on his nose. Frei said he watched the video, and couldn’t see any powder, and that the video was not submitted as evidence in support of a warrant.
    Part of the reporting was that his kids smelled bad, and complained of being hungry. This was reported by a preschool teacher. Nick’s kids’ ages range from 6 to 16, so it’s doubtful that they would have been going to preschool.

    • Brochettaward

      Reiketa is kind of a dick high on his own minor amount of fame. So while I wouldn’t applaud him getting his, I’m not terribly upset by the news. Fuck that guy.

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        That is a retarded response to someone (anyone) getting (il)legally fucked over. I don’t follow him at all, so I don’t have an opinion of the guy, but I wouldn’t want the cops or courts abusing their authority to ‘get at’ anyone. Especially just for being rude.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I watched several and they seemed to think Barnes, who is apparently on a banning spree against people who disagree with him on the situation, is off base on this one and that the search warrant is pretty solid and that they’ve got Rekeita more or less dead to rights. Rekeita’s a dick but that’s not illegal but it does look like there’s actual illegal stuff (standard disclaimer: drugs shouldn’t be illegal) going on. It does sound like the child endangerment was the predicate for the whole thing though.

  9. cavalier973

    Some things I picked up from the NY Trump Hush Money Extravaganza:

    The judge needs to stop it, and get some help.

    Trump’s lawyers were talking with each other excitedly near the end of today’s jury deliberations. One of them was smiling. At another time, a different Trump lawyer was also sporting a “tight smile”.

    The prosecution team seemed anxious or agitated or something.

    One juror reportedly reads Truth Social, and may be a Trump supporter, who will force a mistrial. His face “lit up” when J.D. Vance entered the courtroom.

    • R C Dean

      I would bet a fair amount of my own money there is no way he gets acquitted. Hung jury is the best case scenario. Which means he stays under indictment until the charges are dismissed (hah!) or the next trial.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Process is the punishment.

      • Brochettaward

        This is the by far the stupidest trial against Trump. I haven’t even bothered to keep up with it, but I’d imagine the prosecution has only continued to embarrass themselves.

      • Suthenboy

        They are not embarrassed because scum like that has no shame. This is not a trial. It is a show trial in the hallowed tradition of Nazi Germany, Soviet Russia, Castro’s Cuba, etc.
        As far as I am concerned until every one of those fucks is no longer practicing law, preferably in a jail cell,
        any pronouncement coming out of the courts in general holds about as much weight as a flea’s fart.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Nothing’s gonna hppen to them Suthen. The legal system is well and truly fucked.

  10. R C Dean

    From the toxic masculinity files, Corpsman Willis at Iwo Jima:

    “during a savage hand-to-hand enemy counterattack, daringly advanced to the extreme front lines under mortar and sniper fire to aid a marine lying wounded in a shell hole. Completely unmindful of his own danger as the Japanese intensified their attack, Willis calmly continued to administer blood plasma to his patient, promptly returning the first hostile grenade which landed in the shell hole while he was working and hurling back seven more in quick succession before the ninth one exploded in his hand and instantly killed him.”

    Eight. Grenades.

    https://www.cmohs.org/recipients/john-h-willis

    • The Last American Hero

      And young people today can’t even what with the microagressions and all.

      • Suthenboy

        That, my friend, is the purpose of it.

    • Ownbestenemy

      These are the stories I told my boys when younger…your life is easy.

  11. Brochettaward

    It’s a First out with your cock out sort of night. But the Glibs? The Glibs are seconding like their peni are innies.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, Sean, Beau, U, and TAFKALack!

      I started moving into my new office yesterday – right outside the door of my boss’s new office so I’ll be within bellowing distance.

      • UnCivilServant

        Since you already have a bellows, build a forge!

      • Gender Traitor

        😄 I’m insufficiently caffeinated to come back with a witty rejoinder yet, so…how are you today?

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m okay I guess. Forgot to turn on the AC in the bedroom, so I sweated way too much overnight. Might as well take that as an excuse to throw the pillowcases and such in the laundry.

      • Gender Traitor

        Laundry? On a weekday?? Do the machines even operate Monday through Friday?

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        Good morning miss.

        Hope the new office is a good thing.

      • Gender Traitor

        I think it will be good. At the very least, getting my computer moved so I can start working in there helps motivate me to lug the rest of my stuff over. (It’s right next to my old office.) Also, this office has more storage, so with any luck I’ll have to do less purging.

        The trickiest bit is that it’s kind of a three-way move – the office I’m moving into was my boss’s old office. He moved into the CEO office, and the new CFO (whoever it turns out to be) will be in my old office. Thus, I’m helping deal some of the now-retired CEO’s old files, trying to figure out what to keep and what to shred, and we’re trying to decide which of my boss’s old files should go into the new CFO’s office (my old office.) Moving always sucks anyway, and this game of musical chairs is kinda making my brain hurt.

      • UnCivilServant

        I often do laundry when working from home. It doesn’t take much attention.

        Also, I have a solution to your paperwork questions – BONFIRE!

      • Gender Traitor

        Ooh! And it’s pleasantly cool this morning! I’ll run around the corner to Gordon Food Service and get the fixin’s for s’mores! 🔥🍫😋 (Inexplicably, no emoji for graham crackers or marshmallows.)

      • Fourscore

        Most important, GT, did you get to keep the luxury CEO chair? The Executive Model?

      • Gender Traitor

        I just get the CFO chair, which is still a little better than my old one. We’ll see if I get to keep it.

    • UnCivilServant

      Was the hearing related to the license suspension?

      • Sean

        Yes. That’s why it’s funny.

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        ???

        His lawyers aren’t getting paid enough. lol. I liked that the judge was speechless, but tookt he time to compose himself before making his ruling on the matter.

    • Gender Traitor

      “We’ve got ’em now, guys! Think how proud the U.S. will be! They give us lots more money!” 🙄

    • Grosspatzer, Superstar

      Which Planet of the Apes flick featured a bombed-out NYC and mutant humans chanting “O Holy Bomb”? Because that’s where were headed. I was a schoolboy during the duck and cover days of the 1950’s. Our leaders were assholes then, too, but they at least seemed to have a healthy fear of nuclear escalation. I’m not so sure about our current assholes.

      • UnCivilServant

        It looks like we have to erase another city or two. I nominate Carthage.

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        New York delenda est.

      • Grosspatzer, Superstar

        No love for Hackensack, UCS?

      • UnCivilServant

        I was looking for something in the Old World.

  12. Ownbestenemy

    Morning. Tomorrow I have to drive down to Louisville to fix their stuff. Not really looking forward to since I have to be there at 6am.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, OBE! Their equipment damaged by those storms that went through KY the other night?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Nah, this is more computery system adminy stuff.

  13. UnCivilServant

    Grr…

    From the proliferation of Yard signs it appears there’s a contested election for my local ward in the city council.

    Guess what I can’t find? A list of who’s running for the spot!

    • Gender Traitor

      Maybe buried somewhere in the county Board of Elections website? Or is the NY attitude along the lines of “If you don’t already know, we’re not going to tell you”?

      • UnCivilServant

        I started with the board of elections.

        By their site you wouldn’t even know it’s a presidential election year, let alone a local election year

      • UnCivilServant

        I found a sample primary ballot for the Dems.

        All the signs out belong to Team Blue.

      • rhywun

        Yeah, I had to skip the election for my alderman, among others, where the contestants were Democrats.

    • Grosspatzer, Superstar

      Dumb and Dumber, most likely. Here in the NYC metro we are getting bombarded with ads for a Dem primary race between Bowman and Latimer for the House seat representing parts of El Bronx and Westchester. Two turds.

    • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

      Why would you need to research the candidates?

      Just pull the lever based on party affiliation.

      • UnCivilServant

        You forget what New York is like. It’s a question of “Who’s Evil and who’s Stupid Evil?”

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        Just referring to the typical POV of most voters.

    • Not Adahn

      I voted in my local school elections in a vain attempt to rein in the spending.

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        Locally we’ve narrowly avoided increases lately.

        It will come to a head soon because the teachers will probably go on strike this coming year. (They’re doing ‘negotiations’)

        Seems like a lot of money gets spent on frivolous things and the teacher pay here is legitimately not great. Of course, their total classroom time isn’t that high either…

      • UnCivilServant

        I put it on my calendar to show up and vote no on the budget.

        I even went and read what they proposed – it was all hiring of non-teacher staff whose roles are worthless to negative.

      • Not Adahn

        Lol mine was literally “spend $” without any mention of what it would be spent on.

      • UnCivilServant

        🤔

        I suppose they could have been less transparent, but they did give a breakdown of how the proposed increase would be spent.

      • rhywun

        My school district’s election just got unprecedentedly rejected and that’s something for this town.

  14. Grosspatzer, Superstar

    Mo

    • Grosspatzer, Superstar

      rnin’,reprobates!

      • Gender Traitor

        Good mo

        rnin’ to you, too, ‘patzie! Glad to see you! 😃 How are you and all of yours?

      • R.J.

        Morning!

      • Grosspatzer, Superstar

        Hi, GT.

        Got a new office, I see. With any luck you’ll find some juicy tidbits in those old CEO files and fund a comfortable retirement…

        Yesterday I celebrated 71 trips around the sun. By celebrated I mean hung around while a service guy repaired both ovens. This after Mrs. Patzer’s car died in the garage and needed battery replaced. Best. Birthday. Ever.

        Oh, there was a very nice dinner, and cheesecake for dessert. The spawn leave for Japan tomorrow, I will chauffer them to JFK. Oh joy.

      • Gender Traitor

        Happy Belated Birthday, ‘patzie! 😃🥳💃👯‍♀️🎉🎊🎈🎂 So sorry about the SNAFUs you had to deal with, but cheesecake makes everything better! 😋

        As it happens, on Tuesday my supposedly-vacationing boss had me searching the old CEO’s office looking for some particularly juicy tidbits about a couple of our managers (one a “senior” manager.) Couldn’t find them, given the quality of the old CEO’s filing habits. (Instructions for how to notify local TV stations if we’re closing or delaying opening due to weather were in a file labeled “2014 Budget.” 🙄) Fortunately, boss says he got the info he needed elsewhere, and apparently there will be some Serious Meetings on the matter midday today, after which I’ll probably have to circulate a couple of Separation Checklists after the fireworks fizzle out.

      • Gender Traitor

        And good morning, R.J.! 🙂

      • UnCivilServant

        Now I want to know how that shakes out.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Happy belated patz

      • Gender Traitor

        WGT will continue to follow this developing story.

      • Fourscore

        Oh, oh, G’patzer, you’re gaining on me. Temporarily anyway.

        Happy B’day, even if I’m late. Kiddos going on a vacation or?

      • Grosspatzer, Superstar

        Thanks for the b’day wishes, all. @Fourscore, the spawn are celebrating the youngest Patzer’s Masters. He starts his new job in July, taking a last trip before joining the ranks of tax cattle. Saying sayonara to the days of summer vacations and carefree youth.

  15. UnCivilServant

    I hate whoever wrote Amazon’s interface.

    What is the point of the filters if they do NOTHING!?

    My existing travel laptop is starting to falter, so I’m browsing potential replacements. I know I’m a memory hog, so I set the filter to only the largest options, and it still shows me models with a paltry 8GB RAM. That’s fucking worthless.

    Related, anyone have a recommendation for a travel internet machine – I plan to install linux on whatever I get. I want a lot of RAM and would prefer more than two USB ports.

    • Ownbestenemy

      System76’s Pangolin?

      • Not Adahn

        I hear they have viruses.

      • UnCivilServant

        Oof, for a travel internet machine those price tags make me hesitant.

    • rhywun

      Maybe they got their query logic from Google search.

    • Not Adahn

      cyberpowerpc

      • UnCivilServant

        You’re trying to make the System76 look cheap, aren’t you?

    • cavalier973

      “I was a burger flipper at McWendy King’s, but some smart-alec who had a better job than me quit his job and took mine!”

    • cavalier973

      I wish David Angelo still had his video about the minimum wage still posted. It was funny and informative.

    • cavalier973

      I don’t know how true this is today, but burger-flippers at McDonalds used to earn a higher wage than cooks at Burger King, because working at McDonald’s required higher skill. You had to cook a dozen or so burgers at the same time at McDonald’s while Burger King had that little track that rolled over the fire, so there wasn’t the time crunch. You could “have it your way” at Burger kIng because they had time to put whatever toppings you wanted.