How to Think Like a Roman Emperor
If you have anger issues, this one is a great tool (h/t mindyourbusiness)
This week’s book:
Discourses and Selected Writings
Disclaimer: I’m not your Supervisor. These are my opinions after reading through these books a few times.
Epictetus was born a slave around 50 ad. His owner was Epaphroditus, a rich freedman who was once a slave of Nero. Though he was a slave Epictetus was sent to study philosophy under Musonius Rufus.
Epictetus was lame and there are some stories it was caused by his master and others that it was caused by disease.
He was a freedman when all philosophers were banished from Rome in 89 by the Emperor Domitian. He then started his school in Greece, and had many students. He did not leave any writings from his lessons, but one of his students, Flavius Arrian, took notes and wrote the Discourses.
Epictetus did not marry, had no children, and lived to be around 80-85. In retirement, he adopted a child that would have been abandoned and raised him with a woman.
He died sometime around AD 135.
He might be my favorite Stoic teacher. I love his bare bones and very straight forward approach.
Following is a paragraph-by-paragraph discussion of one of his lessons. Epictetus’s text appears in bold, my replies are in normal text.
The fields of study in which the man who expects to make progress will have to go into training; and that we neglect what is most important Part I
There are three fields of study[1] in which the man who is going to be good and excellent must first have been trained. The first has to do with desires and aversions, that he may never fail to get what he desires, nor fall into what he avoids; the second with cases of choice and of refusal, and, in general, with duty, that he may act in an orderly fashion, upon good reasons, and not carelessly; the third with the avoidance of error and rashness in judgement, and, in general, about cases of assent.
All three of these areas are foundational to practicing Stoicism. Putting all of them together will lead to living a life free of stress from things outside of my control.
Among these the most important and especially pressing is that which has to do with the stronger emotions; for a strong emotion does not arise except a desire fails to attain its object, or an aversion falls into what it would avoid.[2]
Strong emotional reactions are sometimes impossible to avoid, but knowing if it is caused by a normal circumstance, like the death of a loved one, or caused by anger can change how I react to it and help to keep it under control.
This is the field of study which introduces to us confusions, tumults, misfortunes and calamities; and sorrows, lamentations, envies;[3][† 1] and makes[4] us envious and jealous—passions which make it impossible for us even to listen to reason.
All of the emotions listed bring more problems and can not be left uncontrolled if I want to have a free life.
The second field of study deals with duty; for I ought not to be unfeeling like a statue, but should maintain my relations, both natural and acquired, as a religious man, as a son, a brother, a father, a citizen.
I had strong emotions when my mom died, but I was able to keep myself calm and be an asset for my step dad and youngest brother, both of them had the hardest time dealing with the loss.
The third belongs only to those who are already making progress; it has to do with the element of certainty in the matters which have just been mentioned, so that even in dreams, or drunkenness, or a state of melancholy-madness, a man may not be taken unawares by the appearance of an untested sense-impression.—This, says someone, is beyond us.—But philosophers nowadays pass by the first and second fields of study, and concentrate upon the third, upon arguments which involve equivocal premisses, which derive syllogisms by the process of interrogation, which involve hypothetical premisses,[5] and sophisms like The Liar.[6]
Having a more advanced understanding of Stoicism is a requirement before understanding of how to deal with strong emotions is feasible. If I don’t understand the difference between external factors and internal ones, there is no way to focus when I am having an anger attack about something way outside of my control. I would just try to fight it without knowlege that makes self control easier.
—Of course, he says, even when a man is engaged in subjects of this kind he has to preserve his freedom from deception.—But what kind of a man ought to engage in them?—Only the one who is already good and excellent.—Do you, then, fall short in this? Have you already attained perfection in the other subjects? Are you proof against deception in handling small change? If you see a pretty wench, do you resist the sense-impression? If your neighbour receives an inheritance, do you not feel a twinge of envy? And is security of judgement now the only thing in which you fall short? Wretch, even while you are studying these very topics you tremble and are worried for fear someone despises you, and you ask whether anybody is saying anything about you. 10
Epictetus loved to point out to his students that they were not as far along in their studies as they believed themselves to be. I have the same issue sometimes and realize the reason I am struggling is because I have not stopped and thought about my immediate reaction, instead I just let it roll. Once I catch myself doing this, it is easy to get my mind back under control, but there are still times when I don’t realize what I’m doing until after the feelings have passed.
The trouble with stoicism and most other schools of thought is that they point out the obvious, things we have a great deal of trouble avoiding despite knowing better.
Wife: “You need to stop procrastinating.”
Me: ” I am going to, I am just waiting for the right time.”
Once Stoicism was defined, the next step was to hire a Stoic trainer to follow you with a rolled-up newspaper and whack you on the head when you stepped out of line. I think the scroll that advertised that service was lost in the fire of Alexandria.
In all seriousness, thank you Ron. Timely advice today. Even if my problems are small, the emotions are running too high.
My problems too, are small. I seem to do my best to try to make them a crisis, however.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU
My therapist
I would have thought this was your therapist.
Here’s
When you hit SUBMIT COMMENT instead of FILL for a link.
Here’s my therapist.
I try not to do that.
I’ll learn to stop procrastinating… eventually.
Manana, amigo, manana.
Your next project after the clock should be a robot that thwacks you on the head based on non-Stoic brain wave activity. You could make enough money to retire.
I’d have to learn to read minds.
The practical joker in me says you should make the silliest brainwave reading hat possible, which does absolutely nothing. Then program the robot to take a swipe randomly. By the time people figure it out you will have bought Libertopia at Sea and gone far away from the reach of the authorities.
Just repurpose this. Add some stickers and zero or two to the end of the price.
https://theradome.com/products/theradome-evo-lh40-1
this
Not this?
I prefer this:
https://imgs.search.brave.com/NwlHZfNQWy6dsvHEep_qTts5cLYCPsqTkA7kuvjLZws/rs:fit:500:0:0/g:ce/aHR0cHM6Ly9pLmlt/Z2ZsaXAuY29tLzIv/MjJkYnF0LmpwZw
“Manana, amigo, manana.”
There is a common misconception that “manana” means “tomorrow”. What it really means, in practice, is “not today”.
When someone tells you he’ll get to it manana, don’t expect it to be done the next day.
There is a common misconception that “manana” means “tomorrow”.
But then “hasta manana makes no sense.
Really, if you’re not combining those with flowbees, you’re losing out on market share.
RC: It is almost as if different cultures see time differently.
“Island time”
Being at the appointed time and place promptly is white supremacy.
My wife has “Okinawan time”.
She is habitually 1/2 hour late to EVERYTHING.
My husband is of the “15 minutes early == on time” mentality and kind of hammered that into me, but my laissez-faire attitude toward being 5-10 minutes late (my mom’s influence) has transformed into such anxiety of being on time or a little earlier that it starts affecting me the night before. How long will it take me to prepare? Am I leaving on time? [How long will it take to get my mom in the car with walker/wheelchair?] How long will it take to get there? [How long will it take to get my mom into the building with wheelchair?]
It’s become a thing and now I need to chill, but don’t know how.
So am I, but not when the wife is involved.
If it’s an appointment or something important, that’s the only time I make her get ready before she wants to.
If it’s just me, I HATE being late.
“It’s better to be 5 minutes early than 1 minute late”
My old boss
If he was a minute late to a meeting he caught a lot of shit from the attendees.
I have a similar mentality to your old boss. Punctual is late.
Lemme tellya – I have no Stoicism this week. I’d say giddy & possibly smitten.
Good for you KK! Have you already warned/told him about this lot?
C’mon, man, not so fast. Some things take a little time. Give the guy a break. We saw what happened to the OM when the cat escaped from the bag.
Fourscore:
Well, I’m guessing KK isn’t dating NPR
woman.She won’t mention us – otherwise that would mean he would learn that she is mythical.
That’s one way of saying “when the woman escaped from the basement”, Fourscore.
Congratulations, happiness and Stoicism are not mutually exclusive.
We did not get a report.
And no “yada yadaing” the good parts?
She mentioned the cheesecake?
Wait- abject fear and emotionalism aren’t the best way to go through life?
This ain’t NPR here.
I mean, there must be something to abject fear and emotionalism, seeing as how so many people are so enthusiastic about it…
There just something so….dramatic about drama, you know?
My Stoic is challenged again. PJ Media must have a plant here, they stole my idea for an article on the Acolyte.
Meh. Write it anyway? Who reads that rag anyways?
I did. I put the draft out there earlier this week. Might have been last week.
Nah, clearly I put the mind reading robot in a time machine.
I KNEW IT!
I am so glad I ducked out of Star Wars after being all excited to take my kids to The Force Awakens.
Left the theater so disinterested it was confusing.
The big eye roll moment for me was when they revealed Han and Leia were divorced.
I don’t remember doing this, but my wife says I muttered “Oh fuck you” under my breath.
‘Uninterested.’
I said I was confused, didn’t I?
Leia is a stronk Jedi woman what don’t need no man!
Not Adahn:
Super Space Leia sure doesn’t!
I’m having difficulty maintaining Stoicism because apparently both our payroll processor and our 401(k) provider are unable to find their butts using both hands, so our employees’ 401(k) contributions and loan payments from the payroll FOUR weeks ago and the one from TWO weeks ago have still not been credited to accounts. And apparently no one is working today, probably because of the lameass nothingburger holiday that was two days ago. 🤬
And of course this reminds me of some “advice column” I saw a long time ago:
Does your boyfriend remain calm and not panic in stressful situations? He’s probably a sociopath.
Of course when Trump says this – he is unjustly attacking our institutions of justice!
Judge Aileen Cannon is a “partisan, petty prima donna.
Arthur Engoron is a sober, highly respected jurist renowned for his apolitical impartiality.
All projection, all of the time….
If you see a pretty wench, do you resist the sense-impression?
No. But maybe as I get older 😉
Moderating passions is a tricky one. Like he said, the goal isn’t to be an unfeeling statue, but to also not be a banshee every time something bad (or good) happens.
My anger remains a real challenge. One of You People (I think it was Sheldon) reminded me the other day that it’s stupid to waste energy on things I have no control over. I know this, of course, but it still takes me by surprise how often I fuck it up.
“…takes me by surprise how often I fuck it up.”
Thus my first comment. Even when I know better.
Welp, squirrels ate my comment, so I’ll try again, in a different way.
We only get angry about the things we can’t control that negatively impact our lives.
If I can control something and I fuck it up, well, okay. I fucked up. But with things I can’t control, I don’t even have a chance.
All anger is rooted in lack of control.
The more succinct version.
It’s an addiction. The rush of emotion from anger can be as addictive as the rush from lust. It can be hard to resist, hence the 24/7 outrage machine that is our press. They make a killing from our addiction.
I recall that there were quite a few studies showing that venting your anger (punching pillows, yelling in rooms, etc.) made people less able to control their temper over time. But like most studies dealing with people and social stuff, not sure how well it can be replicated.
I think it’s an important component of prayer. Keeping you mindful of your shortcomings and weaknesses and helping to see things as they are.
it’s stupid to waste energy on things I have no control over. I know this, of course, but it still takes me by surprise how often I fuck it up.
I used to be disgusted
now I try to be amused
I cannot control that Elvis Costello ruined Diana Krall.
Love that song. Good advice, as well
My plan this weekend is to put up the fence around the garden. The deer must have know because they decided to sample watermelon and zucchini leaves last night. Had a very unstoic moment this morning.
Fence has to go up first. I learned that too late.
Another Elvis, just because I like it
I was just listening to this the other day
The whole album is terrific
Problem: Americans aren’t narc-y enough to have a decent STASI.
Solution: use the tactic that worked for the lockdowns!
“To get a mother or teacher to come forward, it needs to be a public health catcher’s mitt,” one participant was quoted as saying.
https://nypost.com/2024/06/20/us-news/how-biden-dhs-intel-experts-group-plotted-to-get-mothers-and-teachers-to-report-dissent/
Alas, close blockquote tags, I hardly knew ye.
Thanks edit fairy!
Narrator: “It isn’t disbanded”
“…reclassify political dissent as a “public health” crisis to encourage Americans to report family members or neighbors to the federal government if they displayed “concerning” behavior.”
Gun grabbers no doubt are splooging their jeans over the SCOTUS ruling on domestic violence…it will become the red flag laws they have wanted so badly. We are all domestic abusers now.
reclassify political dissent as a “public health” crisis to encourage Americans to report family members or neighbors to the federal government if they displayed “concerning” behavior.
I;m not crazy You’re crazy.
We start out hard with “desires and aversions.” I’m shockingly, predictably, NOT risk-adverse. Several family stories 4-yo me at Garden of the Gods in Illinois. Unlike my brother, I could kinda swim when I was 2.5 or so. Well, at least doggy-paddle my own way 6 feet or so. I was in Korea eight months after graduating IU, w the contract signed three before. Drug/alcohol use all the way.
–Hrm. I think we’re aware of the pitfalls this led me down. (This September will be the 5-year ‘Anniversary’ of The Incident. Looking at the time since, I’m sure an article will be written (or book… *slaps self, knowing it won’t be done*) .. but I’m not sure what the focus’ll be. Hrm.
–“Desires?” Not sure I’ve really have any/much. A psych issue for now, but I ‘spose I’ve always been an ‘adventurer.’ I am well-aware it’ll be the death of me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Modest Mouse said it well. I find it comforting to be able to get up and go. There’s always something there. Just gotta look.