Independence Day Morning Links

by | Jul 4, 2024 | Daily Links | 164 comments

Nothing much in sports. Not even soccer news. So I’m jumping right in to…the links!

I absolutely love this headline. It’s like saying “Crystal meth: safe, fun party drug but sometimes deadly and life-destroying. The AP might be better than CNN at spinning headlines.

Victims? That’s an interesting word. Especially when they trot out the family members of a dude who later had a stroke and wasn’t hurt at all. No, the real victims are the people still awaiting trial or who spent ages in jail on charges that were unconstitutional to begin with. Interview those poor souls.

We’e not the only ones celebrating today. There will be a lot of celebrating in Britain. And if this guy wins, there will be much rending of garments by establishment politicians and celebrities. So I hope he wins. Because those people are worth irritating.

What a bizarre stroke of luck. I hope they manage to find this kid. (Oops, I lost my head and posted the wrong story.

Here’s the one I meant to link there. I have no clever quip for it.

These prosecutors are failing us all. I don’t know how else to put it. And they simply don’t care, because they know their electorate and know they will face no real repurcussions.

I still don’t understand the crime here. Unless they’re leaving something out of the affidavit, this makes no sense.

These guys were underrated. At least in my book. And I just love this song. Although I don’t want it to happen today.

Anyway, enjoy this Independence Day, dear friends. Smoke some meats, shoot off some fireworks, and drink some beer and be happy we’re still the best country in the world.

About The Author

sloopyinca

sloopyinca

164 Comments

  1. Sensei

    I absolutely love this headline. It’s like saying “Crystal meth: safe, fun party drug but sometimes deadly and life-destroying. The AP might be better than CNN at spinning headlines.

    Comedy gold!

    • Shpip

      I’m betting the AP could do something like that for all of the Glibs. Let’s give it a try:

      “Shpip: Often friendly and clean-cut but sometimes curmudgeonly and slightly drunk”

    • R C Dean

      I’m still amazed at what they think is a defense for Biden:

      “He takes several weeks to recover from a trip to Europe.”

      “A cold pretty much knocks him flat mentally.”

      “Sure, sometimes he’d confused and forgetful. But not always!”

      Those are supposed to make me think he’s just the man for the job?

    • Drake

      Same guy who wrote about the “Peaceful but Fiery” BLM protests?

  2. Ted S.

    I still don’t understand the crime here. Unless they’re living something out of the affidavit, this makes no sense.

    Sloopy must be using speech-to-text.

    • PieInTheSky

      Fireworks are dangerous and should be banned

      • The Other Kevin

        Narrow gaze from Indiana. That’s our chief export. Also guns,

    • sloopyinca

      I’m trying my best.

  3. rhywun

    Victims? That’s an interesting word.

    No mention of the two actual murder victims I am aware of. Stay classy, CBS.

  4. PieInTheSky

    mobile internet in scotland dont work too good.

    • Sensei

      But how’s the haggis?

      • PieInTheSky

        Rather meh.

      • Rat on a train

        Not as good as Romanian haggis?

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      The Scots are thrifty with bandwidth.

  5. Gender Traitor

    What a bizarre stroke of luck. I hope they manage to find this kid.

    What kid would that be? Both principals in this story are men well into late middle age.

    Of course, if you happened to link the wrong story, your link text has a nice pun.

    • sloopyinca

      ::sigh::

      I’m having a rough morning, I guess.

      It’s somewhat fixed.

    • Fourscore

      Was he singin’, “I ain’t got no body” ?

  6. rhywun

    There will be a lot of celebrating in Britain.

    By Labour. Farage will do better than anyone expects but I thought Labour was running away with it.

    • PieInTheSky

      Labour will win.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        That was a given. The question has always been how bad the Tories were going to get roflstomped, not if. The only interesting bits are if the amusingly globalist Scotish Nationalist Party have any seats left and how many Farage and Reform manage.

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        I would laugh my motherfuckin’ ass off if Labour had to work with Reform to form a government.

  7. rhywun

    ‘Newport Beach is a safe community and we’re mourning the loss of someone,’ he said.

    Not anymore it isn’t.

    I am expecting countries like NZ to post warnings about safety here much like we do all the time for other countries.

    • Sean

      “Hide your sheep.”

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        “make sure to help them over fences”

  8. rhywun

    These guys were underrated.

    👍🏻

    I was obsessed with that song in 1983. Still one of my favorite bands.

    • The Last American Hero

      Why did they change their name to U2 and go more mainstream?

      • rhywun

        The better to fit their heads up their own asses?

  9. PieInTheSky

    A man has been jailed for brandishing a replica of a sword from the Nintendo game The Legend of Zelda on the streets of a Warwickshire market town, which he said was a “fidget toy” to keep his hands busy.

    Anthony Bray, 48, of Nuneaton, was sentenced to four months in prison after being found in possession of a bladed article in public.

    The article in question was a replica of the “master sword” from The Legend of Zelda series which had a total blade length of 6in, Warwickshire police said.

    https://amp.theguardian.com/uk-news/article/2024/jul/03/man-jailed-for-carrying-replica-sword-from-legend-of-zelda-video-game-in-public

    Too be fair 6 in is huge. Massive.

    England is now a safe place.

    • Sean

      Neck tats. Showing a history of bad decisions.

    • sloopyinca

      Britain is a nation of emasculated cuckolds.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Too be fair 6 in is huge. Massive.

      That’s what I keep telling her.

      unrelated: had a dream last night that you were in. Hope you enjoyed the bottle Spud and I opened for you.

      • PieInTheSky

        How ca you dream of someone if you dont know what they look like?

      • Old Man With Candy

        All Glibs look like Comic Store Guy.

      • slumbrew

        That’s hurtful and untrue, Old Man.

        I do not have facial hair.

    • R C Dean

      4 months in jail for having a toy sword in public. 4. Fucking. Months.

      Six inches isn’t a sword, anyway. It’s a knife.

      Was the blade even metal? Looks like plastic in the pics.

      • juris imprudent

        The sheep were terrified just the same, and that is the offence.

      • DrOtto

        These guys all come in with the same “new” ideas. Cut costs by sending jobs away and going with lowest bid supplier w/o any concerns for quality. They then keep 75% of the savings as CEO pay and return 25% of the savings to the shareholders. Then they wonder why customers defect on their next purchase after getting a shitty product.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Don’t forget focus on widget metrics that really don’t matter because they have no clue about the business they’re [temporarily] in.

    • DEG

      Oh boy.

  10. Evan from Evansville

    The dude arrested for trying to withdraw one cent…I can legit see it. He looks like a homeless dude well-passed losing quite a bit of his wig, and the exchange:
    “A man, later identified as Michael Fleming, walked into the bank and filled out a withdrawal slip for 1 cent and handed it to a bank teller, the affidavit said. The bank teller reportedly told Fleming he couldn’t withdraw a penny.

    “So you want me to say the other word?”‘

    I certainly can imagine that being a weak attempt at robbery, while still managing to leave the Quiet part…mostly unsaid.

    • DrOtto

      Would be clearer if the article stated if he had an account at the bank or not.

      • Brawndo

        Judging by the picture, it’s most likely his bank is his left shoe.

  11. ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

    The one, true song that should be played today

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_tyWt_9Bfs

    And you should be ashamed for not playing this, Sloopy!

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        That would have been an appropriate choice.

    • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

      Of course, the second song should be this, in light of the specific link

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOz2PVCdKf0

    • Beau Knott

      An American tune by an American composer about America and its variations.
      Written when he was 16. Smdh Stick around for the pedal solo — he described playing it as ‘almost as much fun as playing baseball.’

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        Again, an appropriate choice.

  12. Brawndo

    Good morning! I hate the government

    • Sensei

      Don’t worry it hates you too!

      • Sean

        😂😂

      • Plinker762

        The wolf doesn’t hate the sheep.

  13. Brawndo

    Is putting 1 cent on a withdrawal form the new way bank robbers are telling workers that they’re being robbed?

    Unless the guy didn’t have an account there or didn’t put his account info on the form, I have no idea why the teller would say “you can’t withdraw 1 cent”. Though the fact he apparently said “am I going to have to say the other word?” (Presumably that word is “robbery”) makes me think he had criminal intent.

    • Gustave Lytton

      It’s like the .97 at Costco.

  14. DrOtto

    Our town parade is at 8:30 this morning to “beat the heat”. Wife is dragging me to it. You can’t see me, but I’m blinking “SOS” in Morse code with my eyes.

    • Ted S.

      We’ve got scattered showers today, and then possible thunderstorms on Saturday (I have to work Friday). I was hoping to get up to the mountains sometime over the weekend. 🙁

  15. Sean

    I played https://squaredle.com/xp 07/04:
    *19/19 words (+6 bonus words)
    📖 In the top 1% by bonus words

    I played https://squaredle.com 07/04:
    *59/59 words (+17 bonus words)
    📖 In the top 17% by bonus words
    🔥 Solve streak: 364

    • R.J.

      Why did I look?

      • Sean

        Ugh. Same here.

      • The Last American Hero

        Because it said Norway.

      • Grummun

        Why did I look?

        You heard “nordic breasts” and thought “Swedish bikini” instead of “geriatric reindeer herder”?

      • DEG

        I don’t even have the excuse of having had Irish coffee this morning…..

    • Q Continuum

      Not Q-approved.

    • The Other Kevin

      It’s never the ones you want to see.

    • R C Dean

      *Tres Cool has entered the chat*

      • Tres Cool

        I could work with that. But she’s ghey.

  16. Rat on a train

    Happy “three thousand tyrants a mile away” day.

    • The Other Kevin

      Can’t wait to see how the White House makes this all about trans rights.

      • R.J.

        Ooo! Good call. You know it’s coming.

      • juris imprudent

        With trans that will be the only thing coming.

      • Mojeaux

        According to my TERF Twitter feed, the trans with new gear/tackle aren’t coming at all.

  17. Shpip

    Party of hysterical, histrionic foot-stompers

    If those on the left wing of the Democratic Party hope to exercise power and bend the national party to their will, they might try to stifle any self-righteousness and learn different lessons from Representative Jamaal Bowman’s defeat.

    TW: The Atlantic, with archived link

  18. Common Tater

    ““These are deeply personal decisions and we believe these surgeries should be limited to adults,” a White House spokesperson said over email. “We continue to support gender-affirming care for minors, which represents a continuum of care, and respect the role of parents, families, and doctors in these decisions.” ”

    https://19thnews.org/2024/07/white-house-statement-gender-affirming-surgery-minors/

    Does this person have a name?

    • Common Tater

      “According to the New York Times, the announcement came following an article that reported staff in the office of Assistant Secretary at the Department of Health and Human Services, Rachel Levine, had urged the World Professional Association for Transgender Health to remove age minimum guidelines for surgeries.

      The proposed guidelines had suggested age minimums of 14 for hormonal treatments, 15 for mastectomies, 16 for breast augmentation or facial surgeries, and 17 for genital surgeries or hysterectomies. However, the final guidelines released in 2022 had all age-based recommendations removed.

      “Adm. Levine shared her view with her staff that publishing the proposed lower ages for gender transition surgeries was not supported by science or research, and could lead to an onslaught of attacks on the transgender community,” an HHS spokesman said on Friday.”

      https://thepostmillennial.com/biden-admin-says-it-opposes-child-sex-change-surgeries

      CWAA

      • Suthenboy

        This administration is an absolute freak show. How did we come to this?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Putting mentally ill people in positions of power?

    • Suthenboy

      “Does this person have a name?”

      Yes, yes they do. Josef Mengele.

    • rhywun

      Don’t believe any of that.

      They are 100% behind all “care” as they define it and hiding it from parents too.

    • R.J.

      For Halloween will they go as Princess Leia and Jabba?

      There. Had to say it.

    • Sean

      “What’s missing from every report about this I could find, and what is so crucial to understanding this story, however is that Anthony Bray is a repeat offender with a long rap sheet and numerous prison sentences, several of which were for burglary including serial burglary. In 2011, Bray was convicted and sentenced to four years in prison after getting “three strikes” for burgling residences. But his run-ins with the law go back to 1989 and he was in court numerous times throughout the 90s as well.”

      I called it up above. Neck tats.

      • R C Dean

        I don’t see how any of that justifies a 4 month jail sentence for carrying toy plastic sword.

      • UnCivilServant

        In the photographs looks like it’s at least metal.

        The real issue is that the blade is maybe seven inches

    • The Last American Hero

      You know, if he had also carried an ocirina of time, he could have gotten out of this jam.

      • R.J.

        *Golf clap

  19. Shpip

    We love our plant-based burgers. We just want them converted into beef first.

    • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

      Damn right

      Also, if I’m-a eat the bugs, I want them run through a chicken, then I’ll eat the chicken.

  20. The Other Kevin

    Once again, proof of sloop’s outstanding taste in music. Love that second song too.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    And that has raised questions about whether he’s up for a campaign that’s only going to get nastier and whether he can effectively govern for another four years if he wins.

    As far as I can tell, the nastiness is coming mostly from Team Biden.

    • R.J.

      “… whether he can effectively govern for another four years…”

      He has never governed, he just does what people tell him to do. So how would his ability to govern matter?

    • R C Dean

      I am absolutely astonished that Trump and his campaign are playing this smart and keeping their yappers shut.

      • Gustave Lytton

        He’s sharing his plans for a military dictatorship on Truth Social according to the video clips the wife had on.

  22. The Late P Brooks

    It’s pure coincidence Alan Mulally was he CEO of both Ford and Boeing

    I’m much too lazy to look it up- did he work for Jack Welch, too?

    • Sensei

      He was a Boeing lifer before Ford.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Focus, people!

    The latest struggles in the West Wing mean that the focus is still on Biden’s disintegrating campaign rather than the grave threat to democracy and America’s political freedoms that the president warns is posed by Trump.

    Keep your eye on the ball, America. Look at the big picture. It’s Joe or Beelzebub. You don’t want Beelzebub, do you?

  24. Shpip

    My husband got old. Now I’m cuckolding him.

    As my 78-year-old husband’s libido declined and then vanished with antidepressants and age, I spent five years alternating between anger and grief before asking him to open our marriage. We’d both been nonmonogamous back in the 1970s and we knew the risks: Most open relationships don’t survive, and neither did ours back then. But I assured him that I was not looking for a new partner, and that I was primarily seeking physical relief. I promised discretion and that I wouldn’t bring anyone home or stay out all night. Our life together would be unaltered. I would keep a firewall between my extramarital encounters and him. He could ask any questions he wanted and I would answer honestly, although I knew he was more likely to opt for “don’t ask, don’t tell.”

    He agreed only because the logic of my request was unassailable.

    Twenty paragraphs of post hoc rationalization by a woman who’s old enough to know better.

    • R C Dean

      “physical relief”

      That’s a really strange way to rationalize fucking other dudes. She makes it sound like taking a Tylenol.

      “He agreed only because the logic of my request was unassailable.”

      I suspect it was more just to get her to shut the fuck up about how much she wants to fuck other dudes.

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        I heard sex does help with headaches.

    • Grummun

      Huh I wonder why he was on antidepressants.

    • slumbrew

      Twenty paragraphs humble bragging about how she’s 73 and banging dudes in their 30s and 40s.

      Sure, Jan.

      • juris imprudent

        Not looking, but I’m assuming she does not resemble 70ish Raquel Welch.

      • slumbrew

        No pics but I’m sure you’re correct.

      • Fourscore

        Did she mention how much she was paying or their culture?

  25. The Late P Brooks

    He agreed only because the logic of my request was unassailable.

    And then he quietly revised his will.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    Assault on civil society

    The department’s elimination is one of many goals contained in the extensive conservative playbook that will inform a second Trump term. Project 2025 calls for privatizing education and driving out any programs related to LGBTQ+ youth or diversity.

    “This playbook actually goes into detail that we’ve never seen before,” said Weadé James, senior director for K-12 policy at the Center for American Progress. It would have profound implications on civil rights, school funding and students’ progress – not to mention on the fate of public schools, she said.

    “The striking part about all of this, too, is the Department of Education is actually the smallest of any cabinet-level agency. There are only a little over 4,000 employees within the department,” James said. “So we need to be talking about investing in the department, expanding the capacity of the department to do the work that it is designed to do.”

    Cutting government is worse than the holocaust.

    • R C Dean

      “It would have profound implications on civil rights, school funding and students’ progress – not to mention on the fate of public schools, she said.”

      Look, I already support abolishing the Department. You don’t have to sell me on it.

    • Suthenboy

      I see very little mentioned about teaching children to read, write, do math or think critically. What they do mention is lefty brainwashing.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      I’ve started to see a lot of shrieking about Project 2025. I’m guessing it will be the newest media freakout.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    Trump has made it a regular part of his rallies to harp on diversity and LGBTQ+ issues in schools, too.

    At the faith conference, he vowed to sign an executive order on day one that would cut federal funding for “any school pushing critical race theory, transgender, insanity and other inappropriate racial, sexual or political content on to the lives of our children”.

    There is no such thing as critical race theory, but defunding it would be a crime against humanity.

    • juris imprudent

      Not funding our speech is hate!

  28. Swiss Servator

    Sloopy did extra work, and didn’t notice I had a couple of fill in posts. NEPH’S got pushed back to Noon.

    • slumbrew

      Thank you for working on the 4th.

    • R.J.

      Yes sir! i second that. Thank you very much for the break. I am still in Florida, will be very preoccupied tonight.

  29. slumbrew

    And just like that, Neph’s article is gone.

    *high-fives the other cool kids who commented*

    • slumbrew

      I’m certain I’ve seen that clip before.

    • Fourscore

      Brazen bull battle beats biker badly

    • Suthenboy

      I have no idea why the bull ‘attacked’ a critter that quickly approached directly at the bull from behind and startled it. It’s a mystery.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    Honest? Honest as the day is long

    Imagine that Congress passes a statute authorizing the Environmental Protection Agency to require permits whenever material alterations are made to a “major stationary source” of air pollution (or new ones are created). So far, so good. Now imagine that a power plant near your home has three smokestacks. Does that count as one “major stationary source” or three? And what makes a stationary source “major”? Beyond these substantive questions is a procedural one: Who should resolve these matters? Unelected federal judges, who may have no particular expertise in environmental law, or the federal agency staffed with scientific and policy experts who do?

    Accept my premise unconditionally, or you will be arguing in bad faith.

    Heads I win, tails you lose.

    • juris imprudent

      Expertise – priestly knowledge.

      • Tres Cool

        Thats actually very simple for a power plant. You can have 1 boiler with 3 stacks. The boiler where coal is burned is the emissions unit (EU) and the stacks are all labeled as emissions points (EP) in their air permit. The reason being that each stack letting gases into the air could have a different type of pollution control device.

      • Sensei

        Fr. Cool!

  31. The Late P Brooks

    The animating principle behind Chevron is that, given the range and depth of federal regulations, Congress can’t be expected to define every aspect of every agency’s power with surgical specificity. And it made more sense to let the agencies — to whom Congress delegated the relevant power in the first place — provide any final missing details. As the court explained, “Judges are not experts in the field, and are not part of either political branch of the Government.”

    Roving bands of vigilante judges will terrorize the countryside, lynching bureaucrats and burning their offices.

    • juris imprudent

      Government, just the bureaucrats with no accountability that we hire together!

    • Grummun

      Point out the part in the constitution where it says that the legislative can delegate law-making power to the executive, please.

      • Grumbletarian

        “NECESSARY AND PROPER”!

        sin,
        leftist dullards

    • Raven Nation

      Tom Woods had an update the other day referring to some status (I recognized the name but now don’t remember who it was), who said the saddest thing about the end of Chevron was all his friends who had spent their careers learning how to work Chevron cases who would now be out of work.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    The second fiction — that the power the court took away from agencies will be given back to Congress — is even easier to dispel. It’s hardly a secret that the current Congress is beset with dysfunction and gridlock, and has been for some time. Thus, the idea that Congress would be able to clarify, on a regular basis, any ambiguities in statutes delegating power to executive branch agencies is a farce. The current Congress probably couldn’t agree to clarify that today is Wednesday.

    Contemporary congressional dysfunction aside, it just isn’t realistic to expect Congress to legislate with micro-specificity across every single inch of regulatory real estate.

    Congress is broken and ineffectual, but that’s no reason to think they shouldn’t be trying to regulate every single aspect of our lives. They just need the help and guidance of all-knowing selfless government employees.

    • slumbrew

      “Congress wont do their jobs” is not a compelling argument.

    • creech

      But what about “democracy?”

  33. Suthenboy

    I forgot to mention…Louisiana’s constitutional carry law takes effect today.
    It wont make any difference in my jurisdiction…everyone is carrying already.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    The reality, then, is that the only transfer of power the Supreme Court accomplished by overruling Chevron is a transfer of power to the courts. After all, it is now going to be up to judges to decide what each and every statute agencies enforce means.

    For a law school professor, this guy has a pretty low opinion of the people he trains.

    • Suthenboy

      Silly me, I was under the impression that one of the reasons the courts existed was to check the power of the other two branches.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Or you know, Congress could pass legislation with explicit wording instead of enabling acts for agencies to publish whatever regulations they feel like.

      • Gustave Lytton

        USC is about 43 print volumes and CFR is around 200. Both could use a chainsaw.

      • Suthenboy

        “…use a chainsaw.”

        I was thinking a match.

  35. The Late P Brooks

    I protest, not that anybody is likely to see it in this dying thread.

    The illustration for this post should feature a red blooded Amurrican pistol, like a 1911 or a single action army Colt, not a Glock.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Not dead. There’s no midday or evening posts today. A.M. and P.M. links time slots only.

      • Gender Traitor

        It appears Swissie has scheduled a post from Neph at 11:59 a.m. CDT.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Late drop in? There was an editors note in yesterdays evening post.

      • Gender Traitor

        Please see Swissie’s comment upthread – I think he wasn’t expecting Sloopy to do AM Lynx.

      • Gustave Lytton

        *flips keyboard*

        Just saw it scrolling upwards. How can I live with this level of unpredictability?

      • Gender Traitor

        Ride the roller coaster, baby.

    • Not Adahn

      Glocks are made in Smyrna, GA.

    • DEG

      It might have been made in a basement from a 80% lower. That’s a very American thing.

  36. Gustave Lytton

    That main page pic is triggering. A .45ACP handgun and its Austrian? This is some world class trolling, Incan Sloopy.

  37. The Late P Brooks

    Tom Woods had an update the other day referring to some status (I recognized the name but now don’t remember who it was), who said the saddest thing about the end of Chevron was all his friends who had spent their careers learning how to work Chevron cases who would now be out of work.

    I believe it has been pretty well established that the EPA colludes with outside environmental activist groups who sue the government with the express intent of clarifying expanding federal regulations. I’m sure this holds true for all the other regulatory bodies.

  38. The Late P Brooks

    This should be the accompanying illustration.

    Even in storage, the pistol had a complicated history. When planning began to open Ford’s Theatre as a museum in 1931, Ulysses S. Grant III – a descendent of the leader of the Union armies during the Civil War – requested that the pistol be displayed. The Adjutant General of the U.S. Army refused, saying that its display “would have more of an appeal for the morbid or weak-minded than for the students of history.” After a decade of examining the issue, the War Department turned the pistol over to the National Park Service. It has been on public display since 1942.

    Sic semper tyrranis, motherfucker.

    • slumbrew

      How many lists are we up to now?

  39. The Other Kevin

    Happy 4th everyone! It’s lightly raining but hopefully it will clear up enough for a pool day. Last weekend a nearby neighborhood had their fireworks, and last night our neighbors put on a great show. This is my favorite holiday.