The Hat and Hair Animated: Rerun: Episode 23

by | Jul 3, 2024 | Hat and Hair | 69 comments

Do you remember Fartgate? That asshole who said he’d nuke Americans farted on live TV, and that is why people said he couldn’t win the Presidential race. Not him willing to nuke Americans, because we live in Clown World.

Also, you get to see The Hat smoking meth!

EDITOR’S NOTE: We will only have an 8am and 3 pm post tomorrow.

About The Author

CPRM

CPRM

Organic troll farmer.

69 Comments

    • Tundra

      Sorry. Daughter has a gig and Dad needs to be there!

      Besides, it’s a BBQ and music venue!

      Y’all have a wonderful Fourth and hey – let’s be careful out there.

    • Swiss Servator

      The horror…the horror…the horror…the horror…

      OK, just fireworks about to start…courtesy of the Bubba in the neighborhood (not a slur, the guy has a KY License plate that reads “KY BUBBA”).

      • R.J.

        Nice. Fireworks in an hour here. Tomorrow is like Star Trek Festival, where you can set off any firework you want on the beach.

      • R.J.

        “It is the will of Landrew that you burn down the neighborhood.”

      • hayeksplosives

        “KY BUBBA” —means something very different in Arkansas (shudder)

      • Gustave Lytton

        No fireworks here so far. The dipshit America hating commies are achieving their goal.

      • DEG

        No fireworks here so far. The dipshit America hating commies are achieving their goal.

        We’re making up for it. Fireworks every day this week in southern NH.

    • R.J.

      Sorry. I’m in Florida at a birthday party. Then it’s fireworks time.

    • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

      IT’s 9:20 and none so far. In the South. WTF

  1. R.J.

    Pillow forts are awesome.

    • Swiss Servator

      Hey, maybe I should build one!

    • hayeksplosives

      Last time I built a pillow fort was when my sister and I had chicken pox and all the neighborhood girls were invited over to play in order to build immunity.

      We didn’t need no stinkin’ mRNA.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Shingles would like a word with you.

      • hayeksplosives

        @Guatave, innocently asking here, isn’t the immunity you get from having chickenpox enough to protect from adult shingles, or is a shingles vaccine necessary and effective?

      • Gender Traitor

        My (limited) understanding is that you’re at risk for shingles years AFTER you have chicken pox due to it’s lingering presence. I wasn’t skeert of COVID but I AM afraid of shingles, so I willingly/even happily got the shingles vax.

      • creech

        Having chick pox makes you susceptible to shingles.

      • DEG

        Shingles is the same virus. The virus sits dormant in your body after you “beat” chickenpox. Then if your immune system weakens (say as you age or during periods of stress), the virus comes back to play.

        I think the shingles vaccine uses an attenuated virus to kick your immune system in gear to keep the virus dormant.

      • Sensei

        More specifically. You carry the virus for life. As you age your immune system wanes and the virus re-emerges.

        In older adults usually as shingles and not chickenpox again. It’s the same virus just the effects are different.

      • Sensei

        DEG pre covid I was just about to get the shingles vaccine. Now thanks to my trust in big pharma and the FDA I’m very torn.

        I know two people who had awful cases of shingles including in the eyes. It can be debilitating for weeks.

      • Gustave Lytton

        What DEG says. I got chicken pox as a kid, from another kid that had it, but haven’t gotten the shingles vax yet. I know chicken pox as an adult isn’t any fun and I imagine shingle is similar.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Covid changed my views about vaxes also. Much more reticent about all of them from annual flu to the pcv series.

      • DEG

        I had chickenpox as a kid. Some years later, I had a shingles outbreak.

        I have not had the shingles vaccine. Like others, since the Rona Panic, I have no interest in getting the vaccine.

      • hayeksplosives

        Thank you all for your inputs!

        I too am kinda skeert of a new vaxx after the COVID BS which was clearly about money and control.

      • Evan from Evansville

        I have a semi-not-really plausible theory: I am immune from herpes. I’ve had chickenpox and shingles, why not? (Many reasons.) I was told by some medical person that she got shingles twice. Hrm. (I’ve never had any STD, and recently tested negative for everything. *SWISH*)

        I certainly get injured, but I can’t recall the last time I was *sick.* (Hangovers don’t count.) My fucking generation is creating such weak children, prone to all manner of illness…to shit that isn’t that fucking dangerous if you just get dirty every once and a while. Especially when you’re a kid! Your immune system was designed to fucking learn from exposure! That’s the fucking point!

        COVID was the absolute watershed explosion of it, but it’s been brewing all my life. It’s like watching the Cubs’ current season. Just a slow slew of predictable, terrible shortcomings and failings…slowly eating away at t̵h̵i̵s̵ ̵s̵e̵a̵s̵o̵n̵ ̵a̵n̵d̵ ̵F̵U̵C̵K̵I̵N̵G̵ ̵C̵U̵R̵R̵E̵N̵T̵ ̵G̵A̵M̵E̵ my generation. The Chinese are going to destroy us all. Somehow, someway. Just take away our power for a fucking week. *Kicks pebble*

    • Ted S.

      Why are pillow parts awesome?

      • R.J.

        Pillow farts?

    • Swiss Servator

      Hey sir, long time no see!

    • hayeksplosives

      That…is a thing of beauty.

      Not just the concept, but the execution, right down to the Elon reference 😂🤣

    • Sensei

      That didn’t take long.

      • Fourscore

        There’s on with Kamala as well but not as good.

      • hayeksplosives

        This one even managed a Hawk Tua reference.

        Big props.

    • Evan from Evansville

      DAMN. THANK YOU, SIR. I just shared that w several folk. That is, start-to-finish, well-written, executed, and fiendishly fuck-off funny.

      That should get play in the Morning Lynx to get more eyes. FUCK.

      Bravo. Damn.

    • NoDakMat

      Scheiße, that’s awesome.

  2. R C Dean

    Local news just ran a story that you can have a cookout for 10 for just over $70.

    What are they serving? Two potato chips and half a hot dog each?

    • hayeksplosives

      Just forego the mosquito repellent and open your jaws to take up the bugs like a baleen whale does with krill.

  3. DEG

    Do you remember Fartgate?

    No, and I think that’s good.

  4. Chipping Pioneer

    Love your work, Q.

    Proposition: The WNBA has embraced kayfabe.

    • groat scotum

      If Trump wins I will eat an entire bacon huevos rancheros, over easy. All of that breakfast, including the cubed potatoes. I bet you.

      • groat scotum

        I’ll even finish off two or five cups of Denny’s coffee. PLUS CREAMER. Even if Denny’s coffee tastes like kitty litter.

    • Gustave Lytton

      November is a long way away. A lot of people will hold their nose and pull the lever, and memories fade.

  5. NoDakMat

    Pre-Independance Day (just barely) Hot Take: Badfinger is far superior to the Beatles. Same sound and all that, but Badfinger had the good sense to completely self-destruct before they got shity.

  6. Suthenboy

    Lemme guess…everyone tied one on last night. I usually check in around this time and at least one person is up and about.

  7. Not Adahn

    Good morning! Happy 4th!

    • Sean

      😋

    • Walford

      It’s pronounced Independence Day. Unless you happen to be a loyalist to the crown….hmmm

    • Ted S.

      I’m surprised they have 14-year-old prosecutors.

      • Fourscore

        Oh, for the want of a comma and a proof reader

  8. Sensei

    Vox desperately spinning with a crazy long article that they were forced to use the WSJ article that the rest of MSM shit upon to cover up its complicity.

    Did the media botch the Biden age story?

    • Ted S.

      The story immediately starts off with a Republicans pounce angle. 😐

      • Sensei

        That really doesn’t refute Cruz’s premise either.

      • Fourscore

        It amazes me, it’s been evident for years, that no one wants to admit it.

        How many times did we excuse our parents, because we didn’t want to admit it, then we might have to be responsible for doing something?

        Even now, I shrug off any offer to help, if I can. I don’t want to acknowledge the issues plus I don’t want to bother my own kids.

        Half of the patients in the nursing homes look like Joe, the other half are lucid.

    • R C Dean

      “That’s the third option: The stories should have been tougher, the volume should have been louder.”

      So it’s basically an admission that they knew, and were complicit.

  9. Gender Traitor

    Good morning and Happy Independence Day, Sensei, Ted’S., 4(20), Sean, NA, and Walford!