About The Author

CPRM

CPRM

Organic troll farmer.

102 Comments

  1. MikeS

    I can first at will. It’s my gift. It’s my destiny.

    • Rat on a train

      I shall call you perviy or perv for short.

    • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

      Yo! NoDak!

      • MikeS

        Yo, KK! How’s tricks?

      • MikeS

        Hi! Hope you’re well. I fell behind on your story, so I’m just gonna sit down and read my Kindle version once summer slows down. I did peek last Friday and saw Miranda all baddass and shit. I need to get caught up.

      • Mojeaux the Lazy Yenta

        It’s all good. That’s peak badass for her, but she doesn’t really get less badass.

  2. MikeS

    Red Dog. Nice touch

    • Not Adahn

      I saw that and was taken back to my college years.

  3. MikeS

    Still first

  4. ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

    Space Awesome

  5. Sean

    😂😂

  6. Tundra

    “That’s just what a Judas Priest would say!”

    Brilliant.

    • rhywun

      Donald is screaming for vengeance.

      • MikeS

        He’ll need a painkiller, for sure.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        He Headed out to the hihway

      • pistoffnick (370HSSV)

        We already know The Donald is Breakin’ the Law, Breakin’ the Law

      • Gustave Lytton

        But is The Donald a turbo lover?

      • Timeloose

        No but he sure is hell bent for leather.

      • MikeS

        The only thing Don cares about is The Green Manalishi (With the Two Prong Crown)

        /deep thoughts, with Mike S (and Peter Green)

  7. KK, Plump & Unfiltered

    Grassy Chuck Knoll LOL

    • MikeS

      đŸ„°

    • Fourscore

      Dem Yoopers is da best

  8. Yusef drives a Kia

    Yooper hat! YES!

    • MikeS

      Super duper yooper.

      How’s life, buddy? I’m playing in a disc golf tourney this weekend and have been thinking about you. #nohomo

      • Tundra

        Gay.

      • MikeS

        You wish.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Ha! My 10 week tournament starts Sunday, glad to hear your competing now, good luck and have a great time!
        My MI student is playing in the State ams this weekend as well,
        /proud mentor

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Come play Tundra,
        I love ya but hey,

      • Tundra

        I’ve never tried it. But I meant Mike, not you.

        It looks like a blast!

      • MikeS

        10 week tournament? Da’ hell? Got a link or anything? Sounds intriguing.

      • MikeS

        My tourney is just a local small town bar putting on a super chill tournament for fun on their 9 hole. There is a a $20 buy in and a 100% payout, so maybe I can win back my gas money. No chance of winning back my beer money. haha

    • cavalier973

      “Everyone attending the inauguration of the Iranian president was milling around being super peaceful, talking about all sorts of peaceful things,” reported Bart Lodge, FBI spokesman. “Bystanders then reported several popping noises — almost like someone popping a packet of bubble wrap — and Ismail Haniyeh seemed to stumble a little bit and then fall down. We are still collecting information and hope to have an answer in a few decades.”

      • Timeloose

        Was there a plane overhead with a laser stolen from a university lab built by cool geeks using optics made by a disciple of god?

        This assassination was True Genius.

      • Sensei

        Can any of those geeks hammer a six-inch spike through a board with their penis?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Is that the movie where Val Kilmer is married to Jamie Lee Curtis while leading a double life or the one where Arnold Schwarzenegger is a slacker college student and mentor?

      • Timeloose

        “ Can any of those geeks hammer a six-inch spike through a board with their penis?”

        Not right now

      • Mojeaux the Lazy Yenta

        Is that the movie where Val Kilmer is married to Jamie Lee Curtis while leading a double life or the one where Arnold Schwarzenegger is a slacker college student and mentor?

        Yes.

  9. MikeS

    Where the fuck is CPRM?!?11 I was under the impression that the artist would be here to virtually sign my tits. I demand a refund!

    • Brochettaward

      I’ve Firsted on you so much that no one else would have you.

      • MikeS

        I thoroughly washed.

    • CPRM

      Just got home from work.

      • MikeS

        Going to HH24?

      • CPRM

        Just put it into my work schedule. Third Sunday, right?

      • CPRM

        I’m on the zoom, but I’m the only one.

      • MikeS

        Hope so. I got my campsite for that weekend.

      • CPRM

        hopefully I can get that same room again.

  10. Mojeaux the Lazy Yenta

    These medication names are getting out of hand. New one on me today: Xigduo.

    FFS.

    • Chipping Pioneer

      Sounds Chinese. Would avoid.

      • MikeS

        I’m sure it’s fine. Their labs receive bunches of US $$

    • rhywun

      Side effects include death.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Ancient Chinese medicine huh?

      • Rat on a train

        calgon?

  11. pistoffnick (370HSSV)

    I’m trying to reconnect with my kids after the divorce. Only one of three seems amenable. She’s the adopted one.

    The other two seem to have been tainted by their mother.

      • dbleagle

        Good luck Nick. Time and moving out from the mother often works. A friend I sometimes sail with had his ex poison his reputation for his two daughters. The older one became an adult and realized that the mom was “less than truthful” and has reconnected with my buddy. The younger will graduate HS in another year. It took almost a decade, but things are resolving.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Second the time. I’ve been the divorce kid in that scenario and it wasn’t until adulthood that I realized the truth. My dad always took the high road the entire time, was always respectful towards and talking about my mom, and never vented to us kids.

    • Homple

      Sorry to hear that, Nick.

      • Homple

        I seem to have misplaced the above.

    • cyto

      That’s tough.

      The only advice I can offer is to hit the reset button every day and try again.

      You do the right thing because it is the right thing to do, not because it is easy, nor because it is guaranteed to work.

      Stay strong and always remember what you are trying to accomplish. You might have to play the long game here.

      Praying for you.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Ive been in those shoes. It absolutely sucks. Step-daughter is coming around after years of being told never to talk to me. Sons have shaken the shackles of their now gone mom. Hit me up if you ever need to talk.

  12. cyto

    Gender and sport was on my mind because they had women’s boxing on earlier.

    I turned on the TV a minute ago and there was women’s trick riding BMX bikes. The winner was miles better than second place, despite there only being a 2 point gap. The winner from China did a no hands back flip and some really cool tail whips.

    So the guys are going. Now, this is a quick sport. Like 1 minute to do a run. Girls are great at tumbling and flips. It isn’t so much about speed or endurance. So… guys and girls might be able to compete together, right?

    In a word… no.

    Massive, massive difference. Guys were doing 540 tailwhip spins with a double handlebar spin on the way out. Backflip triple tailwhip… jump flat spin across an obstacle and land on a wall…. just insane stuff. The best ladies trick was a “setup” trick for the guys, just used for filler when moving to another line.

    The differences at the extreme are sooo much bigger than they are among us average folk. My daughter skates with the boys and her runs in the bowl are not that much different than most of the boys her age, even though they are starting to develop.

    These elite athletes? It is almost like a different species.

    • Ownbestenemy

      These elite athletes

      I played with kids that went pro…ya I sucked ass compared to them. I mean, I thought I was good and up against them…I was not. I mean, I played against former pros out of the game for decades and I still sucked. They are on such a different level it is awe aspiring.

  13. Gustave Lytton

    Watch Duty is a stupid name, a stupid website, and is fanning the flames of pansy assed fraidy cats indulging in their doom world. DIAF assholes.

    • Gustave Lytton

      And fuck those pieces of shit worrying their little heads about campfires or fireworks. Turds never would have made it here in the first place in an earlier time.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, Sean, Roat, and U!

      • Gender Traitor

        So far, so good, but at some point today (after the mid-morning senior management meeting?) I’ll probably have to spend the better part of the day rearranging org charts in MS Office. 😕 For better or for worse, I’ll still be reporting to the same guy.

        How about you?

      • UnCivilServant

        Some time “Between Noon and 4pm” the power company will come by to inspect my gas meter.

      • Gender Traitor

        Is your meter inside or outside?

      • UnCivilServant

        In the basement behind a locked door I have to unlock for them.

      • Chipping Pioneer

        Good morning!

        @GT: Are you redoing the org chart because you’re going to kill a bunch of them during the meeting?

      • Gender Traitor

        😃 Great idea!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      “human trafficking”
      So
basically pimps, guys who make sure prostitutes don’t get ripped off by other pimps (and keep the girls in line, sure). Human trafficking makes it sound way more dark than it probably really is (probably because is the child seven or seventeen?).

    • Not Adahn

      Bonta’s a liar about guns, why should I believe he’s telling the truth about hoors?

  14. Sean

    CommaLa is ready. CommaLa is fearless.

    Donald made triggering comments about CommaLa’s race yesterday.

    -My tv

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      That was a play not towards black women, who aren’t going to vote for him anyway, but towards black men, who seem open to it this time to a certain extent and he was right. Some of those guys just don’t want to vote for the personification of the crooked DA who railroaded their cousin or the attorney that fucked them on child support.

    • UnCivilServant

      How about a 366 day tax holiday?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Dream on
        Dream until your dream comes true

    • Gender Traitor

      Oh, yeah – Ohio’s having theirs for the next week, and darned if I can think of what I could buy.

  15. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, homey!

  16. Ownbestenemy

    Google really is just not hiding it anymore. A google search for ‘trump rally’ returns information on his rally, as the second result. Top result is Kamala rally. We are getting democracy good and hard aren’t we?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      People that’re unaware of Google’s bullshit at this point were disposed to vote for Harris anyway or they’re so apathetic they won’t vote at all. “Unfair” sure but not as big a disadventage as in the past election cycles.

      • Ownbestenemy

        They still have the lion’s share of the search engine market. I doubt 90% are all aware of Google’s bullshit.

    • rhywun

      Confirmed, lol.

      I still think the autocomplete thing was more ‘Republicans pounce’ than anything else but… yeah, this is straight up propaganda.

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        At this point, they should realize that Republicans Pounce, and will pounce at shadows. Which can make nothing burgers into something burgers. They need to be more clever in their shenanigans.

      • rhywun

        Nah, part of their power lies in just doing all this shit in your face and saying “what are you gonna do about it”.

  17. Fourscore

    Good morning to all!

    One cup o’ coffee down. A short storm last night with just enough rain to wet the garden down. Last year was a drought, this year the rivers are still running briskly. On the average… I’ll cut grass when it dries out.

    If anyone needs some campfire wood bring a truck and/or trailer to the Third Sunday of September party and we’ll load ‘er up. I got rid of the little wood burner downstairs to a fellow Glib a couple years ago, I still owe him a load but there’s still plenty of dry stuff left.