Kamala, the First of Her Name: Episode 1

by | Aug 7, 2024 | Kamala, First of Her Name | 190 comments

“I’m so happy to join the campaign,” Tim said, holding out his hand to shake.

Kamala slapped him instead, sharply, just one solid blow that staggered him, feet tangled.

“You are here to look old and White and shut the fuck up,” Kamala said.

“I was, I was the governor of Minneapolis,” Tim said in shock, backing toward the couch in Kamala’s war-room. There was a campaign staffer faintly weeping somewhere.

“I didn’t say you could sit down,” Kamala said as he began to lower himself to the couch. “And you are the Governor of Minnesota, fuckwit.”

Kamala sat down behind her vast desk and went back to eating, savagely stabbing at her massaged kale salad.

“I’m here to support you, Madam Vice President,” Tim said in a small boy’s tremulous voice.

“You are here to be seen and not heard,” Kamala said. She flicked a piece of kale at him with her fork. The chunk of fibrous green left a fat comma of oil on his shirt as it clung briefly and then fell to the floor. Tim looked down on it and realized he was standing on a thick plastic tarp.

She flicked another, and Tim nodded while a tear ran down his face.

“I like your record of letting Black Lives Matter burn down chunks of Minneapolis, and killing Geroge Floyd, peace be upon him, was a brilliant masterstroke to get Joe Biden elected, but what have you done for me lately?”

Tim said nothing.

“Good. You’re learning,” she said, pushing the sad remains of her lunch into a trash can. “You’re here to be the most inoffensive choice to my base. Not Jewish, not Black, from a state that was going to vote for me anyway–prove your worth.”

Tim studied his shoes.

“You may speak,” she said with her hyena smile.

“I’m eager to debate Vance,” Tim said.

“He will eat you whole and shit out your bones,” she said. “Try again.”

“I’m White?” Time said.

“Yes, that’s useful,” Kamala snarled. “More, tell me more.” She got up to stand in front of Tim, glaring at him. When he was slow to answer, she slapped him again.

“You’re OLD,” Kamala said. “You balance my youthful energy, my elan, my elegance and grace.”

“I’m only four months older than you,” Tim said.

The last slap–hard enough to send the empty metal drawers of her desk ringing–drove him from the office, cackling following him out of the building and into the parking lot.

About The Author

SugarFree

SugarFree

Your Resident Narcissistic Misogynist Rape-Culture Apologist

190 Comments

  1. pistoffnick (370HSSV)

    Little Timmy likes it rough.

  2. Tundra

    There was a campaign staffer faintly weeping somewhere.

    I love the little details.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Just enough to fill out the scene. It is magnificent

    • juris imprudent

      Speaking of little details… massaged kale salad. Unlike a Kamala word salad, that actually paints a vivid picture.

      • Tundra

        I read right past that one. You are correct – there is something almost obscene about it.

  3. WTF

    I was the governor of Minneapolis

    Perfect

  4. Ownbestenemy

    Excellent. I am getting some real Denethor/Pippen vibes

    or

    50 Shades of Black White

    • Nephilium

      I was thinking of Dexter once the plastic wrap was mentioned.

    • Bobarian LMD

      King Joffery. Only less likeable.

  5. The Late P Brooks

    my youthful energy, my elan, my elegance and grace.

    *outright prolonged laughter*

  6. Drake

    “I’m only four months older than you,” Tim said.

    Heh – he does look 15 years older. Maybe that’s Kamala’s kink. How old was Willie back in the day?

    • Not Adahn

      25 years older, IIRC?

      • SugarFree

        30 years. She was 29 and he was 68 or 69. The timeline of them dating is hazy because the CA press covered for Willie.

      • Old Man With Candy

        Math doesn’t check.

      • R.J.

        Math is raycist.

      • Rat on a train

        Harris: 1964-10-20, Brown: 1934-03-20

      • SugarFree

        I was told there would be no math!

        But yeah, he was 61.

    • SugarFree

      He’s literally the origin of the phrase “Old Man With Candy.”

      • trshmnstr

        I don’t know if that’s hilarious or profoundly sad.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      The republicans still have the younger average age on the ticket.

  7. Not Adahn

    Wow!

    This is a new direction for the series.

  8. The Late P Brooks

    Walz was the only person on the “deep bench” of likely candidates desperate enough to subjugate himself to that nullity. I’m convinced of it.

    • SugarFree

      He likely thinks of it as an honor. Which makes it even funnier.

      • Tundra

        Still feels like a setup to me. They are just too absurd.

      • EvilSheldon

        Walz’ safeword is probably, “More!”

    • Drake

      Probably true. The rumors are Shapiro turned the job down.

      • Gustave Lytton

        If Kamala won, he’d be looking at 2032 at best. If Trump won or if Kamala loses in 2028, he’d be a VP loser and probably out entirely. This way there’s a chance for 2028.

      • Sensei

        I’ve seen that mentioned here. Do you have any other sources?

        I’m not doubting you, just curious who and how they are suggesting that.

      • Sensei

        Thanks!

      • Certified Public Asshat

        The Minnesota governor and vice president sat down for a one-on-one interview Sunday and connected, despite having little relationship prior to the vice presidential selection process, according to two people close to the process granted anonymity to discuss private conversations.

        *orders popcorn for the future*

      • creech

        My GOP contact told me his Dem buddy in Montgomery County politics (where Josh got his start) said “Shapiro is quite lucky another shot missed in Pennsylvania yesterday.”. Trump probably now tucks 19 electoral votes in his pocket but Casey will still win his Senate race.

      • R C Dean

        “two people close to the process granted anonymity to discuss private conversations”

        I absolutely hate this idea that anonymity makes it OK to reveal private matters.

        And, of course, “anonymous sources” are a license for journalists to just make shit up.

      • R C Dean

        I find it difficult to believe he turned the job down after crawling on his belly for it by doing everything he could to deJew himself.

        I think TPTB in the Dem party caved to the anti-Semitic wing. Which, to be fair, can make a very credible threat of riots. And when the foot soldiers of the DNC riot in DNC controlled cities, what exactly is the DNC going to do? Wade in with nightsticks and prison sentences?

  9. EvilSheldon

    Was the inverted banner intended to be a distress signal?

    • SDF-7

      I assumed it was a reference to the titanic change in the campaign…. really the world turned upside down.

    • SugarFree

      Yes and no. It’s mostly because I forgot to ask CPRM in time for him to make a new banner for the series.

    • Bobarian LMD

      SF is really channelling Mrs. Alito.

  10. The Other Kevin

    “There was a campaign staffer faintly weeping somewhere.”

    This was the first of several LOL’s. The whole thing was savage. But as usual, closer to the truth than not. I usually don’t take much stock in the gossip of ex-staffers, but the fact that she’s got that much of a turnover rate is pretty damning.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    I see her devolving into a faint reflection of Colonel Klink in short order.

  12. Timeloose

    “ Tim looked down on it and realized he was standing on a thick plastic tarp.”

    Quite the power move.

    “They can say no, but they won’t say no due to the IMPLICATIONS!”

    • Old Man With Candy

      I wondered if it was a reference to Lethal Weapon 2.

      • Timeloose

        It has become a general pop culture reference for someone getting ready to murder you or engage in bedroom play that will get really messy. Either way she is implying some real bad luck would be coming for the Gov. if he doesn’t play ball.

      • ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

        Funniest scene on TV in years. Talk about really leaning into a character.

  13. The Other Kevin

    Is it just me, or are the rest of you expecting Walz to be replaced any day now?

    • Ownbestenemy

      It would be political suicide to do so. They played their hand on having all the pundits and lefty pols come out and say how terrible a choice Vance was and that Trump should swap him out and here they are, facing that exact situation.

      • Drake

        She was right about the debates. Vance will annihilate him.

        The Dems seem to have recreated their ’84 ticket with the candidates swapped. An idiot token woman and a commie from MN again.

      • juris imprudent

        PROGRESS! [in TeamAmerica Matt Damon voice]

    • Tundra

      I still expect Kamala to be replaced. Unless the donks are truly throwing this one.

      • UnCivilServant

        What mechanism? From what I see they’re down to Arkancide.

      • The Other Kevin

        Yes that too. The precedent has been set, they can replace their losing candidate with a Zoom call when it suits them. As OBE said this would be political suicide, but how many other times have they done something that dumb in the last 6 months? At this point I don’t even try to make predictions, because anything can happen.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Replacing her via a Zoom call and a palace coup turned out not to be political suicide. I’m not sure there’s any hijinks now that would be political suicide. This is a party that is openly anti-American and it’s not hurting them.

      • Bobarian LMD

        “It turns out, Kamala has developed and unsuspected medical condition and we had to take her to a farm, where she can run and play with the Joe and the other old politicians.”

        Chuck Shumer.

      • The Other Kevin

        Gustave, that’s where I was going. They pulled off the coup, and the press just nodded along, the voters didn’t care, and the Republicans said “now see here!” and that was it. Zero consequences. They follow no rules, not even their own.

      • UnCivilServant

        “It turns out, Kamala has developed and unsuspected medical condition and we had to take her to a farm, where she can run and play with the Joe and the other old politicians.”

        It turns out she caught brain worms from RFK.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      No, you can’t replace Daddy.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    Will Kamala’s mannish stepdaughter find a role in her administration? She could be the anti-Finnegan.

    • juris imprudent

      Bring back her trio of interns!

      • Not Adahn

        Neither Asterix nor Kayleeburrow would work for this new Kamala.

      • Bobarian LMD

        You say that like they’d be given a choice.

      • The Other Kevin

        Looks like they were part of the 94% turnover.

      • SugarFree

        I will say I was mildly disappointed no one caught the joke about Seresto. It a flea and tick medicine.

  15. kinnath

    This imposter that claims to be Kamala is way too smart and assertive to be the real thing.

    • Tundra

      Maybe she’s sober and it makes her cranky.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      In front of the cameras she is pretty good about disguising that she is an evil cunt, just not one that is very bright.

      • The Other Kevin

        And often drunk.

  16. Sensei

    Let me help show how you spin Walz’s China relationship into a postive via NBC news.

    Walz brings extensive China experience to Democratic ticket

  17. Necron 99

    SF, I am a big fan of your work (length and girth!) I just don’t think you made Kamala retarded enough. I’m sure it is difficult making “special needs” people evil, yet here we are.

    But who am I? I don’t have inside access to secret white house tunnels. I still enjoyed it.

    • SugarFree

      I can’t decide if she is stupid evil or spiteful evil. A mix, surely, but the characterization will evolve as we go on. For example, Joe Biden was soo boring, I had to mix in Hunter because the stories were getting one-note and predictable.

      • Necron 99

        Surely a mixture, I can’t believe her utter stupidity in public is some kind of act. Of course the Hilldog also played stupid (like with a cloth?) but obvious lies are obvious, she is evil and spiteful and it shows. Kammy is just a whore who failed up and is now at the top with no idea how she got there.

      • Timeloose

        Stupid in public to convince the DNC to put her on the ticket with hopes she will be able to be controlled in a similar manner as Mrs. Piggy. Vicious in private, however revealing the hand up her back and front holes is really a shard of her own broken mind.

        Sort of a Mr. Robot mixed in with a dose of Sybil.

      • kinnath

        Why not both?

        I see her as both stupid and spiteful.

      • Raven Nation

        I tend to think she’s not as dumb as she appears, but she doesn’t do a good job of thinking on her feet. I don’t think she’s a genius, probably around average.

      • The Other Kevin

        She doesn’t understand the issues, and like every other prog has no idea how anything works, especially economics. Looks like she is ruthless at office politics and petty personal stuff, which is itself a skill no matter how odious.

      • kinnath

        Smart/Dumb and Educated/Uneducated run orthogonal.

        She is one of many educated, but dumb, people that somehow thrive in the political environment because they “represent” the right group and can be manipulated by the educated and smart people in the background.

      • R C Dean

        My take:

        She is accomplished at networking and intraparty politics, where her spitefulness can combine with her protection from above to move her forward. She is utterly uninterested in issues of substance, because she just isn’t smart (you can add the modifier “that way”) if you want.

        Get her out of her intraparty bubble, and she’s just mediocre on a good day. The big question of this campaign is, can they keep her “in the basement” for the entire campaign? Because she is dreadful on the campaign trail.

      • ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

        It is the same problem that HRC had, namely a belief that the map was the territory, so to speak. She believes that intra party politics is the only thing that matters, while actually being able to do things, and having a record of things done, isn’t important.

        It is the old story of someone who would rather take short cuts, as opposed to doing the work.

      • Bobarian LMD

        And something to do with a golf ball and 100 feet of garden hose.

    • EvilSheldon

      No, we’re not. But the government is, and the Jarret/Obama State Department is about the baddest of them all…

      • Tundra

        The list of countries really is quite impressive. Did the British do the same shit before they were neutered?

      • ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

        See India and Pakistan, Kenya, Indonesia, and of course Northern Ireland.

    • The Other Kevin

      I see no reason why they haven’t done this here. They have the incentive, the tools, and zero morals.

      • Tundra

        2020?

      • The Other Kevin

        2020, and they’re doing it right now.

  18. cyto

    Unhinged cop story

    Looks like the town is going to take care of business.

    https://x.com/Imposter_Edits/status/1820855065462423625?s=19

    Bullet points

    Unmarked car w/ out of uniform officer pulls over lady for expired sticker

    Again, expired sticker

    Refuses to show badge and pulls gun when she won’t exit the car

    Lady pulled about 30 yards to mom’s house because crazy dude with gun claiming to be cop. Called for minister neighbor to help

    Elderly minister neighbor says cop almost hit him driving up, then got out and pointed a gun at him and cursed at him and his wife

    Cop gets sledge hammer and goes to work on lady’s window

    Lady gets out the other side and gets body slammed for her trouble

    Spends 5 days in jail before multiple felony charges are dropped.

    Again… expired tag.

      • Drake

        I’d have to see the previous 15 minutes of the encounter to have an opinion. Sitting in your car with the window up and ignoring the cop is never an option.

      • Mojeaux the Lazy Yenta

        She doesn’t know he’s a cop. His insignia isn’t visible from the front and he refused to show his badge. She was scared because to her, he was just some nutter with a gun.

      • juris imprudent

        Well pulling a gun and doing the public a service by offing that stupid fucking pig wouldn’t be good form either.

    • UnCivilServant

      I want it to be a felony for anyone to attempt to pull over a vehicle from an unmarked car and not in uniform.

      You look like a random nutter, (or are a random nutter).

      But I’ve also always advocated unlimited personal civil and criminal liability for officers actions on duty. (If it’d be illegal for any other citizen to do that, it’s illegal for you too, officer)

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      Reminds me of the time when cops wearing ski masks and nothing to identify themselves as cops busted into a disco I was in (Yeah, baby. Same disco where I met my wife.) When they first entered they started throwing people around to get peoples’ attention and then they started pointing their guns at people. I thought it was the local mafia until someone in an actual uniform showed up. In a way I guess it was the local mafia. That whole scene could have gone badly wrong.

    • EvilSheldon

      WVa cop? Test him for crank and steroids, right away.

    • The Other Kevin

      I’m pretty sure Indiana state law for many years has been that a cop has to either be in a marked car or be in uniform in order to pull someone over. For this exact reason. I have even hear from the police around here that if you don’t see either one of those, drive to the nearest police station.

      • R C Dean

        Good law.

        I’d go further – when a cop, any cop, is out of uniform, they are no longer a cop and have zero authority as such. None of this “off-duty”crap, none of this “plain-clothes” crap. You want to do cop shit? You have to be clearly identifiable as a cop from a distance.

    • R C Dean

      “Cop gets sledge hammer and goes to work on lady’s window”

      There are places where a guy taking a sledgehammer to a woman’s car window gets shot. In some of those places, charges wouldn’t even be brought against the shooter. We call those places “Remnant America”.

      • Mojeaux the Lazy Yenta

        Watching that clip was harrowing. I was terrified for her, especially when he broke her window.

  19. cyto

    Another crazy moment from the crazy YSL trial.

    Context: this trial is nearly 2 years old and is supposed to be 2 years from completion according to prosecutors.

    This is the new judge who recently took over after the old judge was refused for holding ex parte meetings that gave the appearance of collusion with the prosecution.

    https://x.com/kylenabecker/status/1821220754031263989

    • Sensei

      When did Yves Saint Laurent go on trial?

      • EvilSheldon

        Sorry, I already cracked that joke.

        NGL, though, I do always enjoy seeing a prosecutor getting called on the carpet…

      • SugarFree

        He’s on trial for still using biological females in his runaway shows. After a show trial, he will be burned at the stake.

    • Bobarian LMD

      Sounds like the Defense armed the judge with a stack of sharp objects to poke into the prosecutor’s eye.

      I bet that trial is not gonna last much longer.

  20. The Late P Brooks

    Is it just me, or are the rest of you expecting Walz to be replaced any day now?

    With what?

    • Timeloose

      Some type of replicant made from the pod put near his bed while he slept.

      • Drake

        How would you tell the difference?

      • Bobarian LMD

        How would you tell the difference?

        The pod doesn’t have a navel.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Michelle. Since you know..they tweeted out that odd picture a couple days ago.

      • kinnath

        Big Mike won’t play second fiddle to an Indian

      • R C Dean

        The problem with swapping in Big Mike at the convention is they are going to have problems getting her actually on the ballot in several states. The timing is very tight, what with ballots needing to be printed in time to mail out weeks before “Election Day”.

        I still don’t understand how, under federal law, federal elections can be held by mail, or even how the polls can be open for days or weeks at a time.

        “The Tuesday next after the 1st Monday in November, in every even numbered year, is established as the day for the election, in each of the States and Territories of the United States, of Representatives and Delegates to the Congress commencing on the 3d day of January next thereafter.”

        The statute says there is a single day for the election. Seems pretty clear.

  21. Sensei

    One former FAA official told investigators that he blamed problems on Boeing moving to a “lean” manufacturing model to try to cut costs, and that it cut inspections as part of that process. “A couple of ex-Toyota managers were brought in to build airplanes the way Toyota builds cars,” said James Phoenix, a retired manager of the FAA office that oversaw Boeing. He said when the FAA demanded that Boeing restore inspections, “they complied with all of that, but slowly, very slowly.”

    https://www.cnn.com/2024/08/07/business/boeing-ntsb-hearing-alaska-airlines-door-plug/index.html

    Given how Toyota has been knocking the cover off the ball lately I’m not so sure I’d be holding them up anymore. Took some digging, but I assume this is one of the people he had a beef with.

    https://www.aiaa.org/detail/person/walt-odisho

      • Tundra

        Tacos now, too.

        How do you fuck up a manual transmission?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I’m a huge Toyota fan and nothing other than the Seppuku of the top two levels of management will satiate me. For the love of
        Christ, with all Toyota’s recent problems I’ve been reduced to looking at Fords.

      • Tundra

        Fuck no, don’t do it Stinky.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        “How do you fuck up a manual transmission?”
        The Tacomas are a North America only product I think and I wonder if they were engineered here or in Japan. I’d kill for a bare bones and simple Hi-Lux but they’ll never bring them back here I don’t think.

      • Sensei

        I’ve owned at least one Ford since the late 90s. My 2014 Ford Explorer is likely my last.

        I’m now the owner of two Hondas thanks to Toyota having not updated their vehicles in forever.

        The latest shenanigans suggest that wasn’t a bad choice.

      • Tundra

        I’d kill for a bare bones and simple Hi-Lux but they’ll never bring them back here I don’t think.

        Same. But thanks to our retarded safety regs and chicken tax there is no way in hell.

        I wonder if you could buy one in Mexico and just drive it across. You’d have to get creative with registering the thing but it would be so worth it.

      • kinnath

        My Nissan Titan was manufactured and sold in Canada and then imported to the US.

        The Carfax of just about every used Titan that I looked at buying was the same thing.

    • R C Dean

      That is a willful misreading of what “lean” manufacturing is. It doesn’t mean low-cost, bare-bones. It means following a quality process developed by Toyota that delivered astounding results for them, and has been adopted at a lot of other organizations (to varying degrees of success, true).

  22. kinnath

    In July 2017, the Quality organization was combined with Manufacturing and Safety

    not good

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Strictly factual reprting

    Elon Musk’s X has accused a group of major advertisers of antitrust violations in a new lawsuit claiming the group conspired to “boycott” advertising on the platform.

    The lawsuit claims an influential ad industry group organized “to collectively withhold billions of dollars in advertising from Twitter” because the group was concerned that the platform had deviated from brand safety standards after Musk’s acquisition in late 2022.

    The group is the Global Alliance for Responsible Media, also known as GARM, a voluntary ad-industry initiative run by the World Federation of Advertisers that aims to help brands avoid having their advertisements appear alongside illegal or harmful content.

    That’s how you frame an argument. Musk is suing those people because they’re too reasonable. They’re concerned for the emotional welfare of Musk’s customers, and he doesn’t like it. It has nothing to do with upending the previously existing political bias of the platform.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      “Brand Safety” is quite the euphemism.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      On the one hand it’s underhanded as hell if true. on the other it’s Minnesota and Trump stands little chance there anyway.

      • Drake

        Id team red wants to get in on the cheat, they could just stuff their pre-printed ballots into envelopes marked as Democrats – assuming the team red counters would run them through the counting machines a few times without looking too close.

    • R C Dean

      I could see maybe doing that for primary elections, where the ballot itself only relates to one party. Don’t know if that’s what is going on here. It’s too early for her to have an actual general election ballot, though.

    • ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

      I wanted one sooooo bad in hs, but I got were a Datsun Roadster and a Toyota Corolla liftback SR5.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    People are making complaints about the rough shifting and the manual transmission popping out of gear after a few days with their trucks. One driver had his transmission die at the dealership after 2,700 miles and two weeks of ownership.

    Upon further inspection, metal shavings were found in the transmission, and the transmission fluid shocked.

    Que?

    Is this story from an alleged “car people site”?

    • Sensei

      Yeah, I’d blame the editor more than the author. Still, what?

  25. The Late P Brooks

    What a cool-ass car.

    I like the wheels. I’d ave to see it on a road course first. Those Triumph sixes aren’t exactly as light as a feather, but I think dumping the 302 in there might significantly degrade the handling.

    • Tundra

      I believe they weigh about the same.

    • ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

      Yes, lets take a balanced car an through a pig under the hood.

    • Bobarian LMD

      I was once the owner of a 240Z with a 350 chebby. It did not weigh any more than the original (heavy transmissions in the Datsun), and the center of gravity dropped quite a bit.

      Car was a dream/nightmare. So fun to drive, but everywhere ‘merican met nippon, it was a tragedy waiting to happen.

    • Tundra

      What a cunt. Living through that was a fucking nightmare. Even out in the burbs stores were boarded up and people were scared shitless.

      I really don’t want to share a country with these people.

      • Ed Wuncler

        What an evil thing to say. When the Summer of Love was happening on the Southside two blocks from my parents house, my dad slept with his gun on the nightstand because they could hear the rioters tearing up shit. And my Mother had to call into work because she was too scared to drive. I try not to let politics turn me into a bitter person but when I hear shit like this, it’s hard.

      • Tundra

        I try not to let politics turn me into a bitter person but when I hear shit like this, it’s hard.

        I hear you. It’s getting pretty discouraging.

      • The Other Kevin

        For someone who lives in a presumably gated mansion with 24/7 security to say this?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Burning tires mixed with people’s homes and businesses. And people.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    I wonder if you could buy one in Mexico and just drive it across.

    A friend in college told me he and his dad took the plates off one of their Minis, went to Montreal and bought a brand new Mini (in the ’70s, after Minis were declared non grata in US of A). He said they slapped the plates on, cruised around Quebec for a few days, got it good and dirty, and rolled up to the border. “Anything to declare?” “Nope.”

    When they got it home, they swapped the number plate from one of their parts cars onto it.

    The good old days.

    • EvilSheldon

      Man, I like that idea better than having to debase myself with a GM when my Taco wears out…

      • kinnath

        As far as I know, Nissan has not blown up yet. The Frontier is supposed to be a pretty good truck.

      • ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

        Love my Frontier. Loved the one before it too (had to move it on, as I cannot drive a stick anymore.)

      • kinnath

        I loved my two Xterra’s which share a platform with Frontier.

    • Tundra

      That’s wonderful! We were a proper people, once.

  27. mexican sharpshooter

    You are here to be seen and not heard,” Kamala said. She flicked a piece of kale at him with her fork. The chunk of fibrous green left a fat comma of oil on his shirt as it clung briefly and then fell to the floor. Tim looked down on it and realized he was standing on a thick plastic tarp.

    I had an English teacher that explained the comma is the same shape one makes when castrating a rooster (or cock if you will). Its a “precise cut” and thus a comma should be use with precision.

    The layers within Sugarfree’s writing while subtle, are many.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Yes, I am suggesting she cut his balls off with kale.

  28. ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

    Juris, per this AM:

    Remember, the expansion of voting is under EVERYONE’s understanding as an unalloyed GOOD. This is wrong no matter how popular it is. But it absolutely fits under that big value of equality. There is no way to back out of equality just a little bit. The whole thing has to be shit-canned. You know it isn’t right that your informed vote is of the exact same value as the vote of the idiot, worse when you know that there are more idiots than there are informed. Making that distinction is a violation of equality – morally and legally.

    I understand your position, but the problem is you aren’t showing me anything, only telling me. WHY isn’t good that everyone can vote, WHY should your (presumed informed) vote matter, WHY should someone who YOU presume is an idiot count less, and so on.

    You’re whole position here is an assertion. I could assert that the so-called idiot is simply someone with a different perspective than you, and that we need that difference in order to get a true look at the world and how we should govern it. And so on.

    The whole point is that we need to include these voices in order to have a society that is worth something more than a simply hierarchical, class based system of freedom if the word is to mean anything. Otherwise your argument falls down as being only one class of special pleading. You could just as easily say that voting should only be done by women, as only they are able to have children, or only children should vote, as only they will live into the future. Both of those examples are just special pleading, and no different than the argument that only property owners should vote; only they have a stake in the [whatever you chose is important]. It isn’t that people dislike that argument, it is that it fails upon simple reasoning. Either you are universal in your freedoms, or they aren’t freedoms.

    You are essentially making the argument for the South, for slavery.

    • Drake

      Pure Democracy never really works for long exactly because of this problem. Most people will gladly trade their (or better yet your) freedoms for some handouts.

    • Suthenboy

      “…the so-called idiot is simply someone with a different perspective than you…”
      That’s not the problem Zwak. The problem is that no matter what criteria you use for voting, landed, moneyed, inherited, educated, vested, race, age, etc…and they have all been tried…the idiots are present to the same degree in every demographic. The root of the problem is that we let humans vote.
      “I would rather be governed by the first 2,000 people in the Boston telephone directory than by the 2,000 people on the faculty of Harvard University.” – good ol’ Buckley.
      Maybe we should switch to casting lots or throwing darts?
      What criteria could we use to attract better character to office? Massively destroying concentrations of power would be a good start.

      • juris imprudent

        Seriously, we couldn’t do worse by randomly assigning people in a district to be representatives.

    • juris imprudent

      if the word is to mean anything

      Yet you don’t like what it means now.

      I didn’t say only property owners should vote, although, if govt is instituted for the sake of property rights, I think it is not just an assertion or special pleading. It is the people that benefit paying for that benefit. The point you seem to be missing is that if frozen in amber prior to 1800, the vote would be limited and yet we would think of the country as supporting equality (in accordance with the founding documents). Instead, we ‘progressed’ by expanding the franchise and thus becoming more equal. The deftness of some animals are more equal than others comes to mind.

      I don’t know how you stretch that though into an assertion justifying ownership of other humans.

      When marketing of candidates runs awfully close to the marketing of detergent or toilet paper (harmless decisions there in terms of political consequences), justifying voting isn’t my burden to bear.

      • Drake

        I could go for only tax payers vote. If you pay nothing or receive welfare, nope.

      • ZWAK angry at the world, and the world doesn’t care.

        “Yet you don’t like what it means now.”
        Not sure how you came to that conclusion, but lets move into the meat of the disagreement.

        Which is, I think I see the root of our disagreement here: “…if govt is instituted for the sake of property rights,…”. I do not find that to be the end point of government. I do think it is ONE point, but it isn’t the be-all-end-all in and of itself, though it is an important aspect that, among other things, leads us to the main. No, the point of the gov’t is to keep us all from killing each other. And in that process, make us into a nation.

        Your point that idea of “frozen in amber prior to 1800, the vote would be limited and yet we would think of the country as supporting equality” fails spectacularly in the face of the current push to give the franchise to non-citizens, as the left in this country wishes to do at every opportunity.

        And this tidbit “Instead, we ‘progressed’ by expanding the franchise and thus becoming more equal. The deftness of some animals are more equal than others comes to mind.” is such of such a logical inconsistency as to be mentionable only by way of showing the poorness of the underlying argument. How did expanding the franchise become some animals are better than others? Left unsaid.

        I think you have the bones of an argument, but without pushback to force to flesh it out, it is just a series of assertions.

  29. Suthenboy

    Kamalamadingdong and Putz were chosen for the same reason: To get rid of them. They know they are going to lose so why not use it as an opportunity to pluck off some dingleberries?
    Newsome is, after a full body shave, soaking in a hot tub full of argan oil just biding his time.

  30. kinnath

    https://www.axios.com/2024/08/07/boeing-starliner-iss-spacex-nasa

    NASA’s Boeing Starliner astronauts could be left in orbit til February

    NASA is readying plans to send the astronauts home aboard a SpaceX Dragon spacecraft next February, agency officials said in a press call Wednesday — but has not yet committed to doing so.

    ouch

    • Sensei

      Bonus for them not currently having the software installed for an automated undocking and return to earth installed in the spacecraft.

      My understanding is they are worried that they could permanently foul one of only two crew capable docking ports.

    • Suthenboy

      DEI is our strength.

      Wife tells me she saw a report this morning that Harley Davidson’s CEO has decided they need to go woke. Bye bye Harley….

      • Drake

        Way to know your customers.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        There’s only so many Rob Halfords in the world. If you have stock better sell.

    • trshmnstr

      But, but the I LUST FOR SCIUNCE crowd condescendingly assured me that there was nothing seriously wrong with starliner, and they were just being abundantly cautious with their checks before sending the crew home.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      February? What are they gonna do with all of that comp time?

    • kinnath

      My father likes to quote Twain. One of the quotes he really loves is Twain describing a cool headed guy — “he had the quiet confidence of a Christian holding 4 aces”.

      • Tundra

        Great quote.

    • The Other Kevin

      There are a few different clips of that on Twitter. I’m not really familiar with him, but seeing that, he’s looking like a good choice.

    • Drake

      High quality trolling there.

    • juris imprudent

      Brutal. I can just imagine the rage she had driving away.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      What a weird thing to do.

    • Drake

      Is that who I think it is on Vance’s SS detail?

    • J. Frank Parnell

      OMG. A white man demanding that a black woman answer questions?

      Literally shaking a this sexist racism and/or racist sexism.

  31. The Late P Brooks

    You’re whole position here is an assertion. I could assert that the so-called idiot is simply someone with a different perspective than you, and that we need that difference in order to get a true look at the world and how we should govern it. And so on.

    Unfortunately, there is no practical means of consideration of the depth of support for a political idea. A razor thin majority is till a win, and will be treated as a mandate in the winner take all scorched earth system we currently have.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    Bonus for them not currently having the software installed for an automated undocking and return to earth installed in the spacecraft.

    Musk should offer to deliver the floppies.

    • Suthenboy

      Came up because wife was noting how Trump has to calm down his crowds after his remarks so he can speak more while Waltz and Harris crowds behave like trained seals…clap, cheer, silence…on cue no doubt. I likened their behavior to the cartoon frog that sings and dances and then stops instantly when witnesses show up. That made her think of Joe’s Apartment. Apparently the roaches behaved the same way.

  33. The Late P Brooks

    Is that who I think it is on Vance’s SS detail?

    If you mean the rotund blonde, I was thinking the same thing.

  34. DEG

    “Yes, that’s useful,” Kamala snarled. “More, tell me more.” She got up to stand in front of Tim, glaring at him. When he was slow to answer, she slapped him again.

    This almost sounds like channeling an old story (reposted hier not behind a Google age verification wall).

    • DEG

      Oh, I should point out those sites are NSFW.

  35. Evan from Evansville

    This is my favorite, yet. Evan strongly, strongly approves.

    Swish.