Stoic Friday LXXVI

by | Aug 16, 2024 | Stoic | 154 comments

A Psychologist Shares 3 Ways Men Can Escape The Modern ‘Stoicism Trap’

Nephilium posted this in the links a couple weeks ago and I thought it might be fun to go through. I haven’t read it yet, so maybe there are good points in this one.

Everyday conversations with the men in our lives sometimes strictly revolve around money, expenses, signing report cards, providing transportation and paying bills. These are inevitable practicalities we all navigate. But beyond these logistics lies the emotional realm that often remains unexplored in relationships with men. Think about it, when was the last time you had a deep emotional conversation with your father, boyfriend, brother, or male colleague?

After my mom died, my step dad and brother had a couple serious conversations, but that is not normal for us. I don’t think it needs to be normal. We all get along great and I don’t think trying to get into emotional subjects with them would be productive or interesting.

In today’s gender landscape, as suggested by research, men are often expected to embody “stoicism, competitiveness, dominance, and aggression,” which can have detrimental effects on their lives. And while society rewards them for exhibiting these characteristics, the hidden costs of donning this persona usually go unaddressed.

In the Marines, we were all a little competitive, always comparing physical fitness scores or which section was the fastest at setting up our M198 howitzers. It usually came down to my section and one other section. The other section chief and I were good friends, we had come up through the ranks together. None of this competitiveness ever got serious or bitter. It helped both of us to be better section chiefs. Not having things like this in most young men’s lives is a large part of the overall softness I see in men today.

The Dilemma Of The Modern Stoic

Stoicism, founded in ancient Greece by Zeno of Citium, advocated virtue and reason as paths to a tranquil life, emphasizing emotional balance, self-control, virtue, resilience and rationality. Central to the stoic way of life is the “dichotomy of control”—a principle delineating that we can only control our responses to events, not the events themselves. This philosophy encourages acceptance of what we cannot control, aiming to bring peace of mind and focus on what we can influence.

None of what he says here is wrong, it is the central theme for being a practicing Stoic.

However, over time, Stoicism has been misinterpreted, influenced heavily by stereotypical gender roles. The modern misinterpretation often bolsters the “men don’t cry” rhetoric, equating emotional suppression with strength. This misreading contradicts the Stoic principle of managing rather than denying emotions.

Nowhere does Stoicism deny emotions are felt, especially in times of mourning. Stoicism emphasizes that you should grieve naturally and not dwell on the negative. Once the natural reaction has passed, it is vital to get back to living life. Drowning yourself in sorrow is not good for you or the people who care about you. It also stresses that you should not grieve in such a manner to publicly gain sympathy from others.

A reddit user, throwing light on the shortcomings of this philosophy, confessed:

“It’s completely all or nothing all the time as far as emotions. Either you are taken up by a strong emotion or you are at peace and thus virtuous. What this ignores is that emotions themselves function as attention signals. When you are sad, you feel a loss, when you are angry you feel an injustice, when you are happy, then you’re noticing something good about the world. These feelings motivate action, either to fix a problem or to move toward something better.”

Well, if some random person on reddit says so, then I am convinced. It’s not just that you feel an emotion. Why do you feel that way? If I am sad because something external has happened to me, that does absolutely nothing to improve my situation. How would motivating action help when I am dealing with circumstances beyond my control? If I can look at my reactions and control them instead, then I would get upset much less often..

The irony is clearest when Stoicism, a philosophy geared toward intelligent emotional regulation—limits men from fully embracing essential feelings in social interactions due to false usage and misinterpretation. Originally tailored for extreme emotional crises like wars and used primarily by defense personnel, its indiscriminate application in everyday life can sometimes seem mismatched and unnecessary. The false interpretation of being stoic at all times can leave men emotionally vulnerable and impulsive.

For centuries, the philosophy employed by nations included skill-based training, but due to misinformation, it has now become a psychological trap for men, often leading them into a perpetual internal conflict.

Stoicism is not only for extreme situations. I use it almost everyday and it has really improved my state of mind. This author might be a psychologist but he does not understand the basics of Stoicism. I have a hard time taking seriously anyone that uses this term, “misinformation“, unironically. Stoicism isn’t rocket science, as long as a person is mentally capable of controlling their thoughts and not feeding the angry wolf, it’s fairly simple in most day to day situations.

Rebuilding Positive Masculinity With Stoicism

The key to reconfiguring your relationship with stoicism and your emotional self is acceptance. Recognize your emotions to challenge the false notion that masculinity means hiding or running away from your feelings. True strength is in accepting, understanding and managing your emotions healthily.

Weirdly everything he says in this paragraph is exactly what Stoicism is meant to help with.

Emotions are akin to seasons—just as you can’t prevent rain during a monsoon, you can’t entirely control your emotions. Instead, Stoic principles suggest carrying an umbrella—focusing on what you can control through self-reflection, mindfulness and fostering healthier emotional responses.

While you can’t entirely control your emotions, you can learn which situations are likely to trigger them and be prepared when it happens.

Begin with these three steps:

1. Express emotions regularly. Finding healthy outlets for your emotions is essential. Expressing emotions through open conversation can significantly reduce stress and improve mental health. If direct conversation feels difficult, even talking to a pet or nurturing a plant can help alleviate emotional burdens, as suggested by research. Regularly scheduled emotional check-ins and sharing happy experiences with loved ones can further contribute to sustained mental well-being by fostering self-awareness and connection.

I rarely feel the need to express my emotions regularly. I tell my wife I love her quite often, but have no desire to have any emotional talks with any of my coworkers or friends. There are exceptions, my mom dying being one, but even then there was no need to be overly emotional about anything.

2. Balance rationality and emotions. In life, we often face situations requiring emotionally sensitive decisions. For example, when your child expresses distress after not winning a tournament they hoped to succeed in, advising them to be strong and not cry may not be helpful. Instead, showing empathy, listening to their experience, and acknowledging their effort can provide comfort and help them process the disappointment more effectively and learn from failure. Studies support that integrating emotions with decision-making processes enhances overall well-being.

While being empathetic to your child in the above situation is important, it is also necessary to not encourage them to be weak about losing. I would remind my kids how much that feeling sucks to encourage them to get better at whatever it was.

3. Engage in cathartic activities. Physical and creative activities provide powerful outlets for emotions like anger, frustration and guilt. Engaging in sports or artistic pursuits can help vent these feelings healthily. Research shows that physical activity and creative expression significantly reduce stress and improve emotional regulation. Whether it’s the rush of a competitive game or the immersion in a creative project, these activities offer immediate emotional relief and long-term benefits.

Once again nothing wrong with the advice here. If I am having issues with something a run always helps to clear my head.

Reinterpreting Stoicism to align with its original intent can help men build healthier relationships and a more balanced emotional life. Understanding that emotions are natural and finding appropriate ways to express them can lead to true emotional strength and resilience. By integrating the authentic principles of Stoicism into daily life, men can redefine masculinity, breaking free from harmful stereotypes and fostering genuine emotional well-being.

I would give this article a 5/10. Half of it is good and the other half deals with a veresion of Stoicism that is a caricature created by the same type of person that thinks being a man is “toxic masculinity”

Understanding the true tenets of Stoicism requires emotional intelligence. Take the Emotional Quotient Inventory to know where you stand and if you need professional support.

Just for fun, I took his test and I’ll let you all know if I get a response.

For some idea of the kind of psychologist this guy is, here is his homepage.

About The Author

ron73440

ron73440

What I told my wife when she said my steel Baby Eagle .45 was heavy, "Heavy is good, heavy is reliable, if it doesn't work you could always hit him with it."-Boris the Blade MOLON LABE

154 Comments

  1. Nephilium

    /puts influencer on resume

    While far from being a follower of Stoicism, I find that being in control of my emotions, rather than allowing them to control me has served me quite well in growing up and being successful.

  2. Drake

    Most people have no ability to self-reflect. If I’m feeling a negative emotion, I investigate. Sometimes it’s obvious why sometimes I have to meditate. Often it’s nonsense from a bored mind – and it just dissipates with this realization.

    Before I start expressing my emotions to doing anything about them, I have to know and understand the root cause.

    • UnCivilServant

      I have yet to find proof of positive emotions existing.

      • Tundra

        “He’s a font of misplaced rage. Name your cliché; mother held him too much or not enough, last picked at kickball, late night sneaky uncle, whatever. Now he’s so angry moments of levity actually cause him pain; gives him headaches. Happiness, for that gentleman, hurts.”

      • UnCivilServant

        @Tundra – Not so extreme. Most of the time it’s just nothing.

      • CPRM

        I do have next Friday off.

      • Nephilium

        CPRM:

        Next Friday, local brewery is doing a beer release for the Cleveland Gaming Classic. Last year they brought out a bunch of free play games and did a pinball tournament during the release party. Even the girlfriend had a great time (and got to learn some tricks from a pinball wizard, which was not me).

      • Not Adahn

        You don’t experience la joie du bowling?

      • Ted S.

        My music links don’t make you feel positive emotions?

    • ron73440

      Most people have no ability to self-reflect.

      Not sure if it’s ability or desire.

      • Drake

        Sure – not always a pleasant journey.

      • Mojeaux

        not always a pleasant journey

        1. Too much self-reflection is just self-indulgent.

        2. I have intrusive thoughts, things I’m deeply embarrassed about having done, but, when discussed with my therapist, are just past growing pains and she helps me dismiss them as such.

        3. I’ve taken to driving without music so as to contemplate nothing while I’m driving.

        4. If I drive with music it’s because I’m twitchy and need to blow off some energy.

        5. I can no longer concentrate with music on.

        6. “Happiness/joy” is not the goal. Contentment is, and “happiness/joy” are for special moments. I cry when I’m really happy/joyful (e.g., my kids’ high school graduations because it was sooooo fucking difficult for both of them for different reasons).

      • cyto

        “Intrusive thoughts”

        Hoo-boy…

        Anyone else get vivid memories from long ago about embarrassing moments that induce the same embarrassment instantly?

        I have things from 1st grade and even preschool that still pop up.

        I have to do a mental rubber band snap to break it. Sometimes I even say “no” out loud, making the wife think I’m talking to her.

        Of course, I have much worse memories from adult horrors, but those childhood memories are more surprising because they hit hard and are completely innocuous.

      • UnCivilServant

        Returning embarassment is something that does impact others. It seems to be the largest chunk of dedicated memories.

      • Mojeaux

        Anyone else get vivid memories from long ago about embarrassing moments that induce the same embarrassment instantly?

        I have things from 1st grade and even preschool that still pop up.

        Yes, that’s what I’m talking about. My therapist helped me put them in perspective (the ones I could bring myself to tell her about, that is). The other ones, I also do a sort of check when they happen. If I’m feeling emotionally up to it, I will try to inspect the incident and put it in perspective. “I was 20. That was 36 years ago. No one remembers you, and if they remember this, they’re pathetic. Do YOU remember what other people did to you when you were 20? No? They don’t remember you, either.”

        The other thing I do is to remind myself that I don’t remember things properly, that my memory is shit. I always remember them as the worst possible scenario. I’ve had high school friends say things like, “I don’t think you remember how much fun we had.” and “That’s not the way it happened,” then tell me how they remember it, and it’s always funny/good. It really hit home to me when I couldn’t remember what I’d told my son he was permitted to do and then if I were waffling, he’d say, “You TOLD me I could!” Well, shit. I don’t remember saying that, but it IS something I would have allowed him to do in a more permissive moment, so, okay.

        Aside: I have a few regrets of things I haven’t done. That cliche is so true. I regret not learning how to drive a train, back in the 90s. A local community college is paired up with BNSF to teach railroad tech, which includes engineering and conducting.

      • EvilSheldon

        Anyone else get vivid memories from long ago about embarrassing moments that induce the same embarrassment instantly?

        Yep. It’s an ADHD thing, either a side effect or a component of, no one really seems to be sure which. Being thoroughly ex-Catholic aggravates it.

      • kinnath

        The ADHD article looks to be fundamentally wrong to me.

        Attention Deficit is the inability to focus on any one thing for any length of time.

        Hyper focus is more in the realm of autism.

        As far as I know ADHD and autism are different things with some common symptoms.

      • EvilSheldon

        Moj – I suspect that’s probably self-aggrandizing bullshit.

        But I also can’t help thinking about how wonky I get, if I go too long without spending a weekend out in the Monongahelas in my hammock…

      • Mojeaux

        It’s an attractive theory to me, so much so I wrote something similar in a book with my ADHD/OCD character.

        BUT however hardworking and put-together my son is at work, his performance really suffers when he doesn’t have his ADHD med, to the point where he’s willing to pay $400/month on the brand name if he can’t get the generic, to get it. My daughter’s suffers too but she doesn’t have that much money, so she borrows mine. I can afford to sacrifice a couple of days’ put-togetherness so my daughter can do her job.

        That said, I do think that if I were scrabbling for food out of the ground and survival, I’d be able to focus because there would be nothing else.

  3. The Late P Brooks

    But beyond these logistics lies the emotional realm that often remains unexplored in relationships with men. Think about it, when was the last time you had a deep emotional conversation with your father, boyfriend, brother, or male colleague?

    Hey, this ditch is full of dead people. Why did you bring me here?

    • Fourscore

      i visit my parents at the cemetery a couple times a year. I always go alone, have a serious conversation, in my mind, for a few minutes. Say good bye.

      Seems to help a little. My brothers are too far away, in military cemeteries with their friends, I do a pictorial review frequently on the computer. Those guys were never serious so it’s always a good time.

  4. DEG

    None of this competitiveness ever got serious or bitter. It helped both of us to be better section chiefs.

    The lack of bitterness I think is key. If bitterness or other negative emotions come into play, that leads to destruction. I’ve seen that with men.

    A reddit user, throwing light on the shortcomings of this philosophy, confessed:

    Oh boy.

    Well, if some random person on reddit says so, then I am convinced.

    🙂

    I would remind my kids how much that feeling sucks to encourage them to get better at whatever it was.

    Yes.

    Thanks Ron!

    • ron73440

      The lack of bitterness I think is key

      Only times I’ve seen any bitterness is when a useless person gets promoted and a better Marine didn’t.

      I think the Marine Corps promotion board was really a monkey throwing darts at a list of eligible names.

  5. Tundra

    This author might be a psychologist but he does not understand the basics of Stoicismmen.

    • ron73440

      Looking at his other articles, he is not impressive.

      One said I was guilty of “Benevolent sexism” because I don’t let my 100 pound wife carry the 34 pound bag of kitty litter up the stairs.

      Also I tell her how good the supper she makes is and thank her for the laundry always being done.

      I’m a sexist pig!

      • Ownbestenemy

        Ya know…I think that was the only time I was bitter about someone else. Myself a lowly E3 and an E8 were up for the Leo Marquez Communications-Electronics Award and even though my SSgt said my package was superb, I wasn’t going to compete for the overall award because the E8 is up for promotion. Still got the accolade and beautiful glass award though I guess.

      • MikeS

        “my SSgt said my package was superb”

        This has been just sitting here for two hours. C’mon, people!

      • Nephilium

        MikeS:

        We didn’t want to touch OBE’s package. 🙂

      • Sensei

        Let’s run it up the flagpole and see if anyone salutes it.

  6. Not Adahn

    Just for fun, I took his test and I’ll let you all know if I get a response.

    Not only will you get a response, your junk email box will get a new hoseful of spam.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Ya seems like an email grab…

    • Mojeaux

      OT and carried over from dedthred, what KK said about you on the Zooms. We have had some knock-down-drag-outs, and, shocker, some of us don’t get along. Makes for a spicy Friday/Saturday evening!

      • Ownbestenemy

        Hell you can fall asleep on it and Neph will tuck you into bed turn off your camera

      • Nephilium

        OBE:

        I try to use my minimal powers for good, not evil. This weekend I will likely not be around. At some point CPRM and I have to coordinate, as we each have one of the Duel chips (spiciest potato chip available) to challenge each other on camera with.

      • Sean

        At some point CPRM and I have to coordinate, as we each have one of the Duel chips (spiciest potato chip available) to challenge each other on camera with.

        *points to avatar*

      • cyto

        Is cat butt a legitimate move on zoom?

      • Mojeaux

        Is cat butt a legitimate move on zoom?

        IIRC, only Tonio’s and Tulip’s cats have cat-butted us.

      • MikeS

        “Hell you can fall asleep on it and Neph will tuck you into bed turn off your camera”

        Can confirm

    • ron73440

      That’s why I have a junk email.

  7. Ownbestenemy

    As part of my job…and of course managers that are into “The Next Big Thing!”, I cannot count the number of times I have taken those types of tests…

    /glances at bookshelf in office…ugh.

    • Not Adahn

      What are your DiSC coordinates?

      • Tundra

        My sister’s company developed a gillion of those. I was a guinea pig for every new test. Eventually I said “OK, I get it. I’m an aggressive asshole who hates procedure and collaboration!”

      • Ownbestenemy

        Did that one…I think I have it lying around the office somewhere.

      • Tundra

        Haha! I just found an old one. Di with the dot almost to the edge at about 11:30.

      • Not Adahn

        Here in the labs, almost everyone is a C, with myself and the managers having a D component. There is one guy who is an i but I find him weaselly and untrustworthy.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Yeah found mine..but its like 10 years old. Heavy DC

    • Chipping Pioneer

      I was once told that I had to take one … as I was leaving the company.

  8. R.J.

    When I read that article I felt like the author was confusing Stoicism with the philosophy of Vulcans in Star Trek. Glad I wasn’t the only one.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Did youtube just do some sort of radical format change?

    • Nephilium

      It does appear they’ve stepped up their anti-ad blocker alerts.

      /waits for an AdBlockPlus update

    • R.J.

      For mobile they did something. Now when I got to a video I don’t see anything around it, no comments, title, etc… until I click on it or move it around. Super irritating.

    • Suthenboy

      All Kamala all of the time?

  10. Not Adahn

    I have just found out that this is the last week for the best local soft-serve place until next summer. Horrors! They couldn’t even wait until September 1?

  11. Suthenboy

    Wife was just asking me about Kamalamadingdong. Who is she? Where does she come from? Upper class childhood? Middle class?
    Who is she?

    “I really dont know, I just have impressions. Let me look her up.”

    Half way through typing her in I realized that would be a waste of time. She, like Obama, is a complete fiction. Everything about her is invented with enough blank slate left for people to paint in what they want her to be. I imagine the internet and records everywhere has been sterilized of any and all evidence of who and what she really is. See Obama and his birth certificate, sex life before the national spotlight etc.

    The Democrat party has become a national disgrace and a literal enemy of everything that makes us what we are. Reasonable, rational people are drowning in an ocean of the envious, criminal and power hungry. Has it always been like this? I think the answer is probably yes.

    • kinnath

      Willie Brown plays the long con on America.

    • The Other Kevin

      If you look at the polls, “generic Democrat” always polls better than a specific person. So she is running as a “generic Democrat” for as long as possible. Personally, I think that’s a weakness. Every shit policy from the last 4 years has been supported by every single Democrat. Unfortunately nobody has advised Mr. Trump to take advantage of that.

      • Mojeaux

        I think that’s a weakness. Every shit policy from the last 4 years has been supported by every single Democrat.

        When your opponent is someone people loathe, policy doesn’t matter.

      • Gustave Lytton

        If Trump does, then the “supporters” whine that Trump is an idiot who’s mistakenly running against Biden rather than Kamala’s non-stated non-position policies.

    • The Other Kevin

      But I do agree with you. This election has nothing to do with who is best suited for the job or has the best policies. It all comes down to who wins a war of propaganda, and who can best cheat or counter the cheating. Maybe it has always been this way.

  12. cyto

    Here is where we are in federal law enforcement. We have all seen images of thousands of illegal immigrants crossing the border in large packs, escorted and aided by federal law enforcement and resettled by federal contractors into the interior

    Meanwhile, they take temporary encroachment on the border by a bunch of regular citizens just having fun tubing down the river so seriously they have announcements and warnings from the coast guards of both the US and Canada.

    https://www.thetimesherald.com/story/news/local/2024/08/14/coast-guard-urges-people-not-to-participate-in-sundays-port-huron-float-down/74768827007/

    • cyto

      “Medical emergencies, people drifting across the international border, and people trespassing on residential property when trying to get out of the water before the designated finish line are some of the numerous difficulties encountered during the float down event,” the U.S. Coast Guard wrote

      • cyto

        “. In 2016 strong winds blew many of the participants into Canada without their passports or other key documents.”

      • Tundra

        Looks fun! You should go.

      • Nephilium

        During the lockdown times, Coasties were out in the Lake arresting and warning people who drifted/boated into Canada. I heard similar reports from the Canadian side. The people on the islands were… unhappy. Those with vacation homes in places like Middle Bass or Pelee Island (who were from the other country) were livid.

    • Chipping Pioneer

      I thought the main problem was it’s also a major shipping lane.

  13. Sean

    GRRRRRR!

    CommaLa ads now running on 1.fm

    • creech

      We got 2 1/2 months more of this deluge in PA. By the way, Sean, any idea of what the Souderton school director’s “slur” of Kommiela was all about?

  14. The Late P Brooks

    Suthen-

    All gaslight, all the time.

  15. Ownbestenemy

    With that Fifth Circuit ruling (which is now a split ruling) on geo-fencing warrants being unconstitutional, could be another big blow to the DOJ on their prosecution of J6 rally attenders that were scooped up via that method, especially if SCOTUS rules in the same way.

    • cyto

      Yeah… a big blow… after they all spent years in jail before trial, were bankrupted, and then served their sentences.

      “Ooooh… you overturned my ruling on appeal 8 years later! Ooooh… I’m so worried!”

      The idea that only a small fraction of the US is upset about this really worries me.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Ya that is true. I was trying to find something to be cheerful about

        /kicks rocks

      • kinnath

        Doesn’t help them. It helps the next batch of victims.

      • cyto

        We hope.

        I have little trust in this crew. And if Trump doesn’t win, we probably lose Thomas to be replaced by an authoritarian leftist.

        Big Brother, indeed.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Or the large fraction that are actively cheering on the prosecution of the “insurrectionists”

  16. cyto

    Kamala

    Backpage.

    Prison firefighters

    You never get a second chance to make a first impression.

    I remember the Willie Brown thing, but I’m not out west so that was background noise. Spending years trying to destroy people who had a website? That made an impression. And then fighting to keep people in jail past their sentences or after they are proven innocent?

    Yeah. Woodchipper

    • Suthenboy

      Yes, she is evil. I knew that when I first heard about her prison case as AG. I knew then she as as bad an egg as they get. Then I watched her miraculously rise to VP and now possibly POTUS? We have to get rid of these people.

  17. cyto

    Taibbi had a wonderful spaces with some reporters who have been tracking down documentation on the DNC email hack.

    After years of FOIA lawsuits, they are closing in.

    What I learned: the “Trump is connected to Russia via a bank server” fraud was funded by DARPA. Many agencies and folks lied about it. It was 2 researchers from GaTech.

    The same two researchers did the DNC thing. Also funded by darpa. Also lied about. Crowdstrike said they caught it, but emails tell a different story.

    Also: Crowdstrike installed their monitors a couple of weeks before the hacks. They say “we instantly saw Russian activity on the network”. But didn’t take action until a month plus later, after the mail server hack.

    Hmmmm.

    Lots more. Worth a listen.

    Oh… and FBI agents tasked with investigating found out about GaTech guys pretty quick…. but we’re forbidden from interviewing them.

    Uh, huh.

    Also: GaTech guys had close ties to Clinton campaign.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      They say “we instantly saw Russian activity on the network”

      That could be something as simple as someone pinging their IP or doing a port scan. We all get that.

      • cyto

        Exactly. As far back as the 90s, I put raw server installs on the direct internet just to see. Someone would be on it within the hour. Open relay scans almost instantly.

        Amazing how much nepharious scanning is happening, all the time.

  18. cyto

    Duel chips

    For some reason, YouTube decided I need to see “Hot Ones” hot wing challenge videos.

    In that spirit… I ain’t eating no Duel chip.

    My teenage son bought one of those in Dorito form factor. Funny when teenagers do it.

    • Nephilium

      They’re on sale. Only $5. I assume you’re referring to the Paqui one chip challenge (which is no longer available due to a death and lawsuit).

    • The Other Kevin

      One of my step in laws bought a ghost pepper online and ate it. He cried. Then he got diarrhea, and REALLY cried.

      • Nephilium

        Ha! I had a coworker not believe peppers could be that hot, so I gave him one. Based on the stories told, he burned his ass badly enough he was hallucinating, and his girlfriend almost called an ambulance. He had swallowed it whole, thinking that was the smart play.

        It is not.

      • Tundra

        Are they less aggressive if they are seeded?

      • Sean

        @ Tundra

        Nope

      • Tundra

        Out.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        My youngest and I did the Carolina Reaper sauce at Buffalo Wild Wings… not fun. Habanero (offset by a strong sweet or tart component) is about as far as I’ll go these days.

      • Tundra

        @OBJ

        Me too. I used to enjoy really hot but I’ve apparently become a pussy.

    • Suthenboy

      I dont get the challenge thing. If I challenged people to drink themselves unconscious on rail road tracks would there be morons out there who would actually do it? It’s literally the old “If your friends told you to jump off of a bridge would you do it?” that our parents used as an over the top example of not following idiots.
      What is the fucking point of all of that shit? I mean really, why do people do that nonsense?

    • Suthenboy

      Heat: I like it. Going past what I like is a no-go. Why would I do that?
      Mrs. Suthen and I made some jelly with muscadines we had grown. We tossed in a few Tabasco peppers we had also grown. Just the right amount of muscadine grape, sweet and a strong hint of pepper bite. De-fuckin’-licious. Why would I torture myself?

      My new challenge: Put a few ghost peppers in the blender. Take the pepper paste and use your bare hands to rub it all over your pecker, nutsack and all. I mean really slather it on thick. Then vigorously rub your eyes before washing your hands.
      When you get out of the hospital get back to us and give a detailed report.

  19. kinnath

    https://www.newsweek.com/donald-trump-sentenced-prison-september-fox-news-1939639

    Andrew McCarthy, senior fellow at the National Review Institute and former assistant U.S. attorney for the Southern District of New York, said Trump will not actually be incarcerated even if he is handed a custodial sentence on September 18, as the former president will likely get bail pending appeal.

    Instead, McCarthy said that Judge Juan Merchan, who oversaw the hush money trial and will hand down Trump’s sentence next month, will be helping Vice President Kamala Harris and the “media-Democratic complex” to label Trump a convicted felon sentenced to prison just weeks before Election Day in November.

    That’ll teach him.

    • Suthenboy

      Banana Republic monkeys. Merchan has as much business in a position of authority as I do sitting in the pilot’s seat on a jet airliner full of people.

  20. Gustave Lytton

    Creech’s GopE friends can piss up a rope. They’re fucking losers who want to deliver concession speeches and conserve the leftist nonsense that was implemented in the last round. Fuck those quislings in the ass. They can look in the mirror for where the problem lies. Get rid of Trump (finally!) to get someone more articulate and less offensive? Bullshit, what they find offensive is actually being held to principles and accountability, rather than going back to cozy BAU.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Someone that actually wanted to win would take the [dipshit manipulated] polls as an incentive to double down and work twice as hard. Instead, it’s throw up the hands and say oh well we lost. They’re the fucking children above who are getting participation trophies.

    • creech

      I’ve discussed some of that with him. First, he said it is sticking to principles that is dooming GOP with suburban educated folks on the abortion issue. Give up on abortion and win or stick to principles and lose? Also, he says, winning statewide is tough, no matter how hard you campaign, when 95 percent of the POC communities in the big cities will vote for a cockroach with D after it’s name.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Someone that actually wanted to win would take the [dipshit manipulated] polls as an incentive to double down and work twice as hard. Instead, it’s throw up the hands and say oh well we lost. They’re the fucking children above who are getting participation trophies.

    I can’t help thinking a savvy motivated pollster could conjure up a poll showing Trump with a 35 point lead. It wouldn’t be any more meaningless than any other poll.

  22. UnCivilServant

    While I see upthread discussion on the hottest end of the pepper spectrum, I had a question on the cooler end of the pepper spectrum – How concentrated is the heat in Ancho paste? Can it be used as the base of a soauce on its own without needing to be one of our reaper-munching glibs?

    • Ownbestenemy

      Ancho paste? That is just made from a dried Poblano which are very mild. Test and adjust with some honey or acid to cut through the heat if too much.

      • UnCivilServant

        I know it’s poblanos, I couldn’t find poblano paste where they didn’t dry it. My train of thought is that the lower water content could increase the relative proportion of capsacin in the finished product.

      • Not Adahn

        Can you stand chili powder? Then you’re fine.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Buy some, roast them, steam in ziploc bag, peel skins…run through blender, reduce in pan to paste. Then you can have green poblano paste.

      • Tundra

        And whip up some nice chile verde while you are at it.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Oh with some roasted tomatillos….whelp I know what I am doing tonight! Along with curing some pork belly for bacon.

      • Not Adahn

        OBE is correct, and it’s stupid easy if you have access to a flame source, either a stovetop or maybe your forge setup. I’d guess you could do it under a broiler but I never have.

      • Ownbestenemy

        And if you make it at home you nearly remove all the heat with the removal of the seeds and pith (which is where the larger concentration of capsaicin is)

      • Tundra

        @NA

        I always use the gas grill. Works like a champ.

    • Not Adahn

      Anchos are dried poblanos and are the main component of chili powder.

      • Not Adahn

        Also, I have found that poblanos make an excellent substitute for bell peppers because they don’t have that foul taste that is apparently a genetic thing.

      • UnCivilServant

        But are they a substitute for tomato?

      • Not Adahn

        No, nowhere near watery enough. They have less moisture than bells.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m trying to replace tomato paste, not fresh, if it matters.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Ah..uh, for what application? BBQ sauce or something else?

      • Ownbestenemy

        You can try squash or sweet potato as the base…its all about balance from there.

      • Not Adahn

        That is an interesting idea. For something that thick, yeah you could use them, but you’ll need a blender as OBE mentioned above.

      • Nephilium

        UCS:

        Tomatillos could work as a base, and several of the hotter hot sauces use a carrot and onion base (the carrot adds some sweetness).

      • Not Adahn

        There is a company who’s gimmick was their sauces were one pepper, one vegetable and one fruit. Their OG was habanero/carrot/tangerine.

        They have since abandoned that concept to produce more products:

        https://www.yellowbirdfoods.com/collections/all

      • Tundra

        I love Yellowbird. I have the habanero/carrot/tangerine one in my fridge right now.

      • Timeloose

        You might want to try a mild Gochujang as a substitute for tomato paste. It is semi sweet, a bit spicy, but has a lot of umami flavors. For a more mild flavor, you could go with a Ssamjang

      • Ownbestenemy

        Gochujang is a good idea but you are competing for balance depending on the flavor profile you are trying to achieve.

      • UnCivilServant

        I haaaaaaaate Gochujang.

  23. OBJ FRANKELSON

    The author is definitely in the APA-approved, ‘men are defective women’ school of psychological thought. Such thinking is endemic to the discipline and is massively deleterious to men’s mental health.

    • Suthenboy

      I dont see the point in engaging with such people. The proper response is “Yeah, whatever. Get out of my way. I have things to do.”

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        I generally avoid such people as well. The problem is that when men have actual problems and they go to one of these “professionals” they get told that they are inherently toxic and an oppressor. I honestly think that the failings of psychology as a discipline are a key contributor to men deciding to exit stage left or self-medicate with booze or pills.

        Here are the guidelines, they are and instant cure for low blood pressure.

      • Suthenboy

        Yeah, I didn’t get very far with that. I got to definitions and tapped out. It is evil gibberish.

  24. The Other Kevin

    I really hope this is true. Tulsi has an even bigger vendetta after that TSA thing.

    JUST IN: President Trump has reportedly brought in
    @TulsiGabbard
    for debate prep
    https://x.com/nicksortor/status/1824500492694704562

    • Ownbestenemy

      I mean…she dismantled Harris in 2020, so why not?

    • Tundra

      That never gets old. The crowd fucking hated Kammy and loved Tulsi.

      I think this is a smart move as long as the dipshit listens to her advice.

      • MikeS

        as the dipshit listens to her advice.

        Of course he won’t. Or if he does, one of his dipshit sons will talk him out of it.

    • Chipping Pioneer

      “Like any good Hawaiian, Tulsi knows how to roast a pig.”

      – @MichaelMalice

    • DEG

      Huh.

      That’s a smart move. Too smart for Trump. It has to be one of his campaign staff.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Ja Mein Führer! Paulus will be crossing the Volga any day now!

    • Not Adahn

      What happened to that massacre of Navy Seals?

      This is not me being a jerk to you, I’m wondering if your infosphere is still making that claim or if they’ve retracted it and if so what reason they gave.

  25. Not Adahn

    It’s sad when someone gets to the point where they can no longer enjoy a hobby.

    OTOH, I’m making out like a bandit with him selling off his stuff. 9mm AND 12 ga @ $0.20/round? Why yes, yes I will. BPS shotgun new in box for $350? Yoink!

    • EvilSheldon

      That is sad. Here’s hoping it never happens…

      • Not Adahn

        He is the frail/skinny kind of 80 year old, not the wiry leathery kind.

      • Drake

        Shrugs – MacGregor’s usually pretty good.

  26. The Other Kevin

    On Twitter I have the choice between watching a SpaceX launch and a Kamala speech.

      • The Other Kevin

        The only thing going up during a Kamala speech is my blood pressure.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Their turn around after that Falcon 9 failure was lightning fast.

  27. Suthenboy

    I remember thinking google earth was the greatest thing ever. I spent hours looking at it. Then of course, being the proggy assholes they are, google ruined it.
    currently YouTube is a gold mine of wonderful if you are looking for the right things. I love perusing recipes. Mrs. Suthenboy has just made one of these: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lTQfL2Rd7Q
    BTW I highly recommend all of that chick’s recipes. She is fantastic.
    How long before the proggies turn all of YouTube to shit? One year? Two?

    Taking that taco wreath over to the neighbor’s in a bit…if I can hold off long enough. Jeez that smell is killing me. I cant quit salivating.

    • Ownbestenemy

      I watch Kent Rollins cowboy cook.

    • ron73440

      When Google Earth was brand new, my wife was in my office at work killing time until i could leave with it.

      She looks at Pearl Harbor and the Arizona memorial and says, “Wow, that is so cool”.

      I said, “Of course you think it’s cool, you’re Japanese”.

      After my friends and I finished laughing, my wife gave me the look.

      It was worth it.

      • Sensei

        OK, LOL here.

      • MikeS

        Hahaha!