Final Friday of 2024 Afternoon Links

by | Dec 27, 2024 | Cocktails, Daily Links, I Am Lame | 117 comments

Christmas day was a good time, the nephews are in the withdrawn, moody, teenager age, the niece managed to bring me a wonderfully thoughtful gift (a bottle of Scotch she brought back from a vacation), and my sister got me a cock of hot sauce. With that, we’re almost at the new year, so let’s get to it.

Seems a bit pricey for my taste, but I wouldn’t disparage someone for doing this. If they do, I will strongly recommend going to the Rowley Inn right across the street (bacon wrapped tater tots are almost always worth it).

Well, that’s one way to fix the canon.

“Allowing”

News you can use.

Life imitates the Sugarverse.

I think I have a solution to this problem.

I’m pretty sure this means we need to give more money to the TSA.

Reality is really a bitch.

People wonder why I don’t have a bunch of smart devices.

Stupid critics calling bad movies bad.

While I agree on physical media, I think if you’re complaining about the sound quality on your own rips and buying vinyl for it’s better sound quality, you may just be a moron.

Also on the entertainment side, things to start looking for next week.

For the cocktail today, it’s one I’m sure I’ve shared many a times, but it’s an old favorite.

Irish Coffee

  • 1 tablespoon sugar (I strongly recommend demerara)
  • 2 ounces Irish whiskey (Tullamore is my preference, but I won’t turn down Jameson)
  • Freshly brewed coffee (dark roast is my preference here for the stronger flavor)
  • About an ounce of heavy whipping cream that’s beat to the consistency of honey (you don’t want peaks)

To begin with, this is one of my favorite drinks, and one that I only trust a handful of bars to make correctly. Far too many bars break one of my standards to make it not an Irish Coffee:

  1. Using Bailey’s. Bailey’s in coffee is fine, but it does not belong anywhere near an Irish Coffee
  2. Using whipped cream (if this is the route, it’s almost always out of a can). You don’t need sweetener in your cream, and you want to be able to sip through it.
  3. Putting on green creme de menthe (Because green = Irish). This is just wrong, mint doesn’t work with coffee and whiskey, and should be set aside.
  4. For a long time, those were the only 3 rules for a terrible Irish coffee. One place I risked hit all three of those errors and compounded it with a fourth. A gods damned maraschino cherry on top.

Some of you may say, “Neph, you always tell us to make the drinks the way we want. What if I want an Irish Coffee with Bailey’s, whipped cream, creme de menthe, and a cherry on top?” That’s fine, you can have that, just don’t call it an Irish Coffee, and sure as shit don’t put it on your menu as one.

To make the drink is very simple, sugar and coffee into a warmed mug, stir until the sugar is dissolved (you can skip this by using simple syrup). Add the whiskey to the glass, and give it a couple of brief stirs to mix it in. Then take the cream and slowly pour it over the back of the spoon you stirred with (see, there’s a reason I stir the sugar and coffee together) to float the cream on top. The Irish Coffee mug is the traditional vessel, but any mug will do.

Hope you enjoy the times in between.

About The Author

Nephilium

Nephilium

Nephilium is a geek of multiple types living in the vast suburban forests of Cleveland.

117 Comments

  1. The Late P Brooks

    In the third quarter of this year, official UK figures showed 13 per cent of 16 to 24-year-olds were Neets, nearly 1mn people. Two-fifths of these were looking for work; the rest were “economically inactive”, neither working nor looking, opting out of the labour market completely.

    aka on the dole

    • SDF-7

      I suppose if the ants let you get away with it — the grasshopper lifestyle has an appeal.

  2. SDF-7

    and my sister got me a cock of hot sauce.

    Hmm… my son might like that, loving to put hot sauce on his chicken tenders. Shows out of stock though — so I’ll have to comb Amazon a bit before they bill me. Won’t tell my wife — she’s not much of a henpecker on such things, but she’d certainly egg on the situation.

    Happy Friday, all!

      • juris imprudent

        Crowing like he made the sun rise.

    • Suthenboy

      “loving to put hot sauce on his chicken tenders”
      Always with the euphemisms around here.

    • KSuellington

      Chick yourself before you wreck yourself.

  3. Drake

    Owning the Blu-Ray is always better. And the Hollywood censors can’t go back and change scenes based on the latest woke ideas.

    • Tonio

      Actually, they probably could. Not delete the scenes from the media but render them unplayable by updating the player firmware with a list of verboten content. Never connect your Blu-Ray player to the internet unless there is a documented problem you need to fix. Some Blu-Ray discs automatically try to phone home to download updated preview material.

      • Tonio

        …documented problem for which the fix is a firmware update…

      • Mojeaux

        I’m trying to rip my movies to an external hard drive to plug into my TV, but the task is so daunting, I’ve only gotten one or two done.

      • UnCivilServant

        “The latest standard automatically disables playback if no content filter updates have been performed in 24 hours.”

      • Nephilium

        Mojeaux:

        I’ve had good luck with Handbrake (after putting the css dll in the folder). For some of the more troublesome ones, I’ve had to resort to MakeMKV. For watching them, I took a NAS and installed Plex on it, so it can serve my shows, movies, and music.

  4. SDF-7

    Well, that’s one way to fix the canon.

    “It is a start.” I’m not sure about Strange New Worlds (not having watched it)… but lean towards de-canon’izing it since it spun out of the STD fiasco. And the first 2 seasons of Picard were enough of an abomination that the fan service of season 3 (I think it was 3 where they brought the D back after bringing the TNG bunch back together… but then broke up the Titan-A to make a Frakenship Enterprise-G that looks like shit or something? I don’t even consider Online‘s -F canon, much less that crap…) doesn’t save it.

    Really — everything since they made the mistake of letting Abrams fork off the Kelvin timeline should be chucked. Maybe not Lower Decks (haven’t watched much of it)… but the rest of it makes Voyager look like Hamlet.

    • Nephilium

      Strange New Worlds has been pretty good so far (in my opinion). They don’t mention Discovery in the show at all (since Starfleet banned talking about it, that was the way they tried to square it with TOS). Some things seem a bit iffy (such as Nurse Chapel’s personality, and being able to take on Klingons in hand to hand with a combat drug). Lower Decks is much lighter, and faster with deep cut references, but I enjoyed it.

      Still haven’t risked Picard, and I’ve never been able to make it through all of Voyager.

      • UnCivilServant

        I never made it through Voyager either. At most I’ve watched all of the voyager reviews on SF Debris.

      • SDF-7

        Oddly enough I have… though I won’t say I enjoyed Seasons 5-7 all that much that I recall. There were moments — but there were a lot of “THIS gimmick will save UPN!” moments too… (the “holobeach” [excuse to have extras in skimpy swimwear], the wrestling guest stars-of-the-week, etc.) Plus it turned 100 percent into the Seven and Janeway Hour — the rest of the cast were either visibly checked out (Beltran) or neutered as characters (Tom and Belanna… and Harry you just forgot was there most of the time).

    • Suthenboy

      Repeat after me: The Story is told and has played out. Stop.

    • Tonio

      I like Strange New Worlds. It’s the Star Trek we almost got instead of Kirk. The monochrome flashback scenes in “The Cage” were from the first pilot episode which never aired. CBS took the unprecedented step of ordering a second pilot episode with changes (including no female first officer) which resulted in us getting a different crew and shooting in color (the series was shot on 35mm film). Two-part episode “The Cage” used footage from the first pilot for the flashback sequences to when the now paralyzed Captain Pike visited Talos IV.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m really falling into the stereotype trap but…

        The original pilot was shot in color, and the scenes used for the menagerie flashback scenes were in color.

      • UnCivilServant

        I think I found where the misconception came in.

        The color master of the cage got chopped up the make the flashback scenes in the menagerie, but there was a 16mm monochrome print that was circulating after that which was intact.

        So it was color and 35mm, but that print is gone.

      • UnCivilServant

        And if the internet is to be believed, found again.

        In 1987, film archivist Bob Furmanek discovered the missing trims from the color 35mm negative of “The Cage” at a Hollywood film laboratory, and saw that they were returned to Paramount. However, the soundtrack trims were not found. When restoring “The Cage”, Paramount used the soundtrack from “The Menagerie” for most scenes, and the soundtrack of Roddenberry’s 16mm print (which was of lower audio quality) for the restored trims

    • rhywun

      Nothing that has appeared on pay streams exists for me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    • Grumbletarian

      I recommend giving Lower Decks a try. It’s a good lighthearted show with lots of references to the earlier, better shows. Lots of guest appearances by actors reprising characters from the 90s shows. In the opening credits there’s a battle scene that gets larger with each season.

  5. SDF-7

    “Allowing”…

    The joy of Government types — what isn’t expressly allowed is verboten!

  6. UnCivilServant

    Well, that’s one way to fix the canon.

    When it first came out, I gave a very bad review of the first two episodes of Lower Decks. My opinion of those episodes hasn’t changed. It is also a fact that they are the worst episodes of the series of those seasons I have seen. The cringe tapered off, Mariner gained nuance (and the show recognized her flaws as such and ran with it). I have not yet seen season 5, since I don’t pay for streaming from Paramount.

    • Nephilium

      I figure with any Star Trek, you need to give it at least a season. Hell TNG didn’t grow the beard until the second season.

      • SDF-7

        I’d say third — second was too impacted by the writer’s strike and some real stinker scripts (when you start with the stink bomb of The Child it doesn’t help).

  7. The Late P Brooks

    In the air fryer category, as well as knowing customers’ precise location, all three products wanted permission to record audio on the user’s phone, for no specified reason.

    Sure. Who wouldn’t want that?

  8. ron73440

    My wife likes an Irish coffee, I make them exactly like your mix.

    She likes it better when I make it with demerara rum and call it a Guyana Coffee.

    • Nephilium

      There’s nothing wrong with that. There was a time in my youth where we had a group gathered for a special occasion (probably a wedding or rehearsal dinner) where we made truly over the top Irish Coffees. Jamaican Blue Mountain (straight, not blend) coffee, with Middleton Very Rare as the whiskey. They were delicious, and truly a treat.

  9. DEG

    niece managed to bring me a wonderfully thoughtful gift (a bottle of Scotch she brought back from a vacation)

    🙂

    “I was working [in] a retail store and the first few hours were OK, then I had to deal with customers,” reads another. “I packed my bag and just left.”

    WTF? I didn’t like dealing with customers when I worked in a grocery store, but I sucked it up because it was part of the job. WTF.

    Or to put what I said another way:

    Old man yells at clouds.

    (Tullamore is my preference, but I won’t turn down Jameson)

    I haven’t tried Tullamore in an Irish Coffee. I don’t like Jameson in an Irish Coffee, but if it is all I have, I’ll use it. I like Teeling’s, any of their products, in an Irish Coffee.

    I’ve tried some Tennessee whiskey in Irish coffee because I was out of Irish whiskey. I had a single barrel from Chattanooga that worked and the other Irish whiskeys I had did not.

    I agree – no Bailey’s in an Irish Coffee, though I like Bailey’s in coffee. It just doesn’t make an Irish coffee.

    • Nephilium

      I was sticking with the base three with the recommendation. Bushmills I do not like in my Irish Coffees though.

      • bacon-magic

        Bushmills is smoother and much better straight up. Jameson is a harsh drink and Tullamore is just as harsh so of course they would be great mixers.

      • Nephilium

        bacon-magic:

        I don’t care for Bushmills, and Jameson was always smoother to me (with Tullamore Dew being a big upgrade from Jameson).

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Bushmills is a much better drink than Jamesons. Tullamore is the Bose of Irish Whiskey.

        None of them are Midleton or Redbreast. Which are the two best whiskeys in the world.

  10. EvilSheldon

    I just want to say, you are absolutely right in every particular re: Irish Coffee.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Affordability crisis?

    Florida condominium owners are looking at higher costs from condo associations in the new year, a consequence of a safety law passed by state lawmakers in 2022.

    It requires associations to have sufficient reserves to cover major repairs and to conduct a survey of reserves every decade. Because of the law, older condos — found largely in South Florida, according to state records — are facing hefty increases to association payments to fund the reserves and repair costs.

    Tear them all down. They’ll be under water soon, anyway.

    • R C Dean

      They are looking at higher annual costs, to build a sinking fund. The alternative is a truly staggering bill when the repairs need to be made. My HOA has this conversation periodically about our road fund, but everyone has finally quit bitching about “what if I don’t live here when we need to redo the roads”. I was getting tired of pointing out that there was a balance in the fund when they moved in, and they really don’t want to get hit with a lump sum bill when it’s time.

  12. Gender Traitor

    ***SIGH!!!*** Now I want Bailey’s. 🙁 Not straight up or in anything fancy – just a shot in a small mug of milk./sissy lightweight drinker

  13. The Late P Brooks

    I didn’t like dealing with customers when I worked in a grocery store, but I sucked it up because it was part of the job. WTF.

    Or get a job where you don’t have customers to deal with; like digging ditches.

    • SDF-7

      Or an embalmer or something. As long as you aren’t working the front desk / selling the graves, that should certainly be adequate for even the most misanthropic.

  14. UnCivilServant

    Apparently the musician most commonly referred to as “Snoop Dogg” has a cookbook and I was given a copy as a present which may or may not have been intended as a joke.

    Pros – the paper and binding appears to be decent quality; it’s not too heavy to have nearby if being used as a reference.

    Cons – Far too many pictures of the musician; foreward by Martha Stewart (I never really cared for her); Waaaaay too many bold colors and color changes to the point where a midcentury modern interior designer would tell you to scale it back a bit; inconsistant fonts; irregular text flow making it difficult to read; fonts that make it impossible to tell what some of the letters are meant to be; inconsistant recipe formatting; my head hurts just browsing the thing.

    Neutral – thematic recipe naming.

    • SDF-7

      If it isn’t written on hemp parchment, I’m disappointed.

      • UnCivilServant

        It does not say what type of paper was used, but my assessment is that it was not.

    • UnCivilServant

      I would have been the first to say that I am not the target audience, but I figured I should look in case I was surprised.

      Looking at a recipe that I was able to read, they look fairly vanilla. I am disappoint.

      • Nephilium

        I find books about cooking (Alton Brown’s books, Ratio, Improvisational Chef, etc.) more interesting than a listing of recipes.

      • UnCivilServant

        I prefer books on historical cooking and cookery.

        I have to assess the book as it was gifted.

      • ron73440

        I prefer books on historical cooking and cookery.

        Have you heard of Tasting History?

      • ron73440

        He also has a real good YouTube Channel.

      • Sensei

        Ron, I like how Tasting History tries to play straight with the history despite what I imagine are Max’s politics.

        I enjoy his channel.

      • UnCivilServant

        I have heard of Max, I was unable to watch his early stuff because his voice was annoying. He has apparently trained his voice to be more neutral and thus less annoying, so I have been able to watch some of his more recent work.

      • Evan from Evansville

        I’ve enjoyed every bit of this conversation. I will add: I know next to nothing of Snoop Dogg’s early career or as a producer, etc. I know he hasn’t been doing any of that in quite a while, and I gotta say: Damn well-done on him as a businessman. He’s got a character and he’s stickin’ to it. Him and Martha Steward teaming up was, sigh.. *chef’s kiss* on everything. Brilliant marketing. “How do you sleep at night?” “On a pile of money with many beautiful women.” (Only 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑔 Martha Stewart and similar, I’m sure.)

        (Looked him up for a second to check his married life. Damn: “[His brother-in-law] died in 2002 after a standoff with Las Vegas police, during which Snoop unsuccessfully attempted to reason with him to surrender.” Don’t know more, but good on him for trying.)

  15. The Late P Brooks

    Celebrity premium

    Even if the land ultimately fails to sell for $200 million, Reznik believes it will still set a record for the region. That’s in part because of the Amazon.com Inc. founder, who’s bought three properties in Indian Creek since 2023, including two next door to the lot that’s now for sale. Bezos is expected to tear down those two properties and replace them with custom builds.

    On his third purchase earlier this year, Bezos paid roughly $87 million.

    “I think $200 million is a big number but I’m confident that in the end the buyer will pay a little extra because Bezos is a neighbor,” Reznik said. “Those prices just didn’t exist before he came to Indian Creek.”

    Bezos should just buy everybody out and build a castle.

  16. KSuellington

    Absolutamente correct on the Irish coffee Neph. I was given a couple of bottles of Red Breast for my bday and though I was oils normally only drink that stuff straight, I may have to follow your youthful lead and make at least one top shelf Irish coffee out of it. Such a fantastic drink.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    NEET-o

    The number of Americans applying for unemployment benefits held steady last week, though continuing claims rose to the highest level in three years.

    Jobless claim applications ticked down by 1,000 to 219,000 for the week of Dec. 21, the Labor Department reported Thursday. That’s fewer than the 223,000 analysts forecast.

    Continuing claims, the total number of Americans collecting jobless benefits, climbed by 46,000 to 1.91 million for the week of Dec. 14. That’s more than analysts projected and the most since the week of Nov. 13, 2021 when the labor market was still recovering from the COVID-19 jobs wipeout in the spring of 2020.

    The rising level of continuing claims suggests that some who are receiving benefits are finding it harder to land new jobs. That could mean that demand for workers is waning, even though the economy remains strong.

    Or the demand for jobs is falling.

    • R C Dean

      If demand for workers is waning, how is the economy “remaining strong”?

  18. KSuellington

    Im a music junkie and have a hi-fi at home that is good quality (but nowhere near audiophile standard, I don’t have that much money nor the hearing to discern that). I have a good record player with an excellent cartridge and needle. That makes a huge difference. I would say vinyl gives a different, not necessarily better or worse, listening experience compared to high quality digital streaming. But it’s more about the fun of physical media and tactile experience than anything. Some music does just lend itself more to the pops and such of vinyl.

    • The Bearded Hobbit

      I still have over 300 vinyl records of music that I like but only about half of them are available in digital format. I like hearing the old stuff sometimes.

    • ron73440

      That works as an endorsement doesn’t it?

  19. Aloysious

    Oh look. A list of things that people have shoved into places that they don’t belong.

    *peruses list*

    A spork? Why?

    • Aloysious

      I mean, I can understand the need to sporkulate food.

      But a vagina?

      • Nephilium

        The bag of soil (vagina) and the domino (penis) both raised some questions and eyebrows.

      • Evan from Evansville

        “Mental illness does not discriminate…”. <– Officially stolen. Well-said. I plan on using that with deadpan in the future.

  20. Sensei

    One of my favorite car channels. Small auto repair place in upstate NY. Real cars, real small business issues and dislike for the government. And he is an excellent mechanic.

    TLDW. He closed his shop over Christmas only having to drag his wife’s minivan to the shop and fix it on his holiday.

    The still functional, but broken backup camera completely polluted the network in the car and rendered it completely non running. What a shit design.

    I Am Starting To Hate Cars….

    • DrOtto

      Yeah, I watch his channel to learn. He’s great at diagnostics. He kept ranting about not needing the cameras, of course they were mandated about 10 years ago, so that ain’t gonna happen. Like Eric, I’m really starting to despise where the manufacturers are going in the race to the bottom. Mahle started using China for manufacturing so I’m already seeing failures on barely out of warranty cooling system parts on BMWs that are 5 years old.

      • Sensei

        BMW water pumps have become the gift that keeps on giving ever since the impeller became plastic and the power source electricity.

      • DrOtto

        Oh yes, forgot about that. Same car two weeks after the leak was fixed. Likely because the pump burned up from running low on coolant.

  21. Evan from Evansville

    More NEET-O. Damn opening graf: “I’m considering living in the wild, just trotting around the globe with little money,” reads a post on a Reddit forum for Neets. “I was working [in] a retail store and the first few hours were OK, then I had to deal with customers,” reads another. “I packed my bag and just left.”

    Ok, buttercup. Ya probably can do what I did if you’re willing to sacrifice everyone and place you’ve ever been. Broken Human can’t fucking deal with a fucking human speaking English (presumably) in a normal interaction between two homo sapiens. You’re gonna have to deal with waaaaaaaay more people when you fly away. It’ll be uncomfortable. Get used to Charlie-Chaplin-ing your way through life.

    Let’s say Broken Human goes to Korea (wherever). Gets a remote job. Doesn’t have to really do shit in public Korea. They’ll be at all the weiguk/ gainin spots, only English. (Wouldn’t learn anything, I imagine.) And just be a Broken Human living by themselves, maybe a cat, and never really interacting with another person. I’ll say it: I’m worried Internet 2.0 is fundamentally breaking our species. The Broken Humans surround us, and they’re out there. More to come. Me worry.

  22. rhywun

    Young people are rejecting work. Why?

    Because we are paying them to.

    JFC, this isn’t rocket surgery.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    The still functional, but broken backup camera completely polluted the network in the car and rendered it completely non running. What a shit design.

    I linked that earlier. Just watching him take the interior plastic off the liftgate drove me nuts.

    And (rhetorical question alert) why does everything have to be on the same network? Why not isolate the ecu so the stupid thing can still get you home?

    • Sensei

      I enjoyed his rant about the single screw. WTF? Why have it if the rest of the panel clips in.

      There are high and low speed networks in many. So the windows run on the low speed for example. In this case the camera appears to need access to both. I guess the video needs high, but why does it need access to fuck up the low speed bus. JFC.

      • Sensei

        I read that when it came out. One word.

        Chrysler.

    • DrOtto

      CAN was federally mandated around 2005 I think? So the government told them they couldn’t for some stupid reason.

      • Sensei

        I didn’t think CAN itself was mandated. Features that would take miles of additional wire without it ARE mandated.

      • DrOtto

        I just looked it up, it was mandated in 2008, some manufacturers started doing the CAN protocol beginning in 2005.

      • Sensei

        Sigh…

  24. rhywun

    the biggest flaw with streaming is the inconsistency of connection,

    That flaw didn’t even occur to me among all the other, bigger flaws.

  25. Suthenboy

    Jobless claims: I can see in my lifetime the demand for workers approaching zero. AI and robotics is about to take off like a rocket. I am wondering how we will adapt to that.

    That occurred to me after someone posted this: https://www.reddit.com/r/milsurp/comments/17fh1vl/two_of_americas_service_pistols_adopted_just_75/?rdt=49442

    Also today while watching ‘A Wonderful Life’ I saw them using the old telephone with the separate mouth and ear pieces. I remember using my Grandmother’s phone like that when I was a little kid. She had it hanging on the wall by the kitchen door. Now I have an iPhone with nearly the entirety of human knowledge in my pocket.

    A lot of docs are saying they think AI will help us repair DNA and extend our lives maybe indefinitely. But what would we do? I suspect most people would screw, get stoned and use up air in an endless orgy of self-indulgence.

    • Evan from Evansville

      Honestly, why wouldn’t we?

      (Not having more kids would help our extinction, as well. Yay!)

      • Suthenboy

        Why wouldn’t we? If I have to explain it….

    • KSuellington

      “ But what would we do? I suspect most people would screw, get stoned and use up air in an endless orgy of self-indulgence.”

      You say that like it’s a bad thing.

      But seriously, even though you are correct for what many people would do (and I would certainly spend some of the extra time doing exactly that) it would open up so many possibilities. I already have too many hobbies and am picking up more as I go along. I don’t want to live forever and I really don’t think the technology will allow that anytime soon or at all, but if I could get to 100 and still be participating in sports and mental gymnastics I would be ecstatic. Life goes by far too quickly. I think the key will be extending useful life rather than just life.

      • juris imprudent

        useful life rather than just life

        Suggest you reference the NEET article for the counterpoint.

      • Evan from Evansville

        Eh, people are people. I’d certainly choose to live with as much pleasure and as little pain as possible. I would keep my morals, but more time for leisure. Most would continue as they did, methinks. More hobby time and creation. Same amount of madness and despair. I’d assume population would be the biggest issue, but more prosperity and time lower birth rates. A self-correcting ‘problem.’

  26. The Late P Brooks

    Another, better, car content video popped up for me last night. Very cool guy.

    Conversation and shop tour with the guy who created SCAT. I honestly am awed and dumfounded by the people who create businesses like this.

    • Suthenboy

      Me to Sean: “Is she any good in bed?”
      Sean: “Who cares? Did you see what she cooked for supper?”

      • Sean

        😂

        *insert why not both.gif*

  27. Tres Cool

    It was a million to one shot, doc!

    “PATIENT STATES HE TRIPPED IN THE SHOWER AND FELL BACKWARDS AND LANDED ON A SHAMPOO BOTTLE WHICH BECAME LODGED IN HIS ANUS”
    “PATIENT STATES SLIPPED AND FELL IN THE BATHTUB LANDING ON A SHARK TOY”

    • Suthenboy

      Is that the same Nun that said a guy fell off of a roof, landed on her and got her pregnant?

      • Suthenboy

        Reminds me of old Catholic school joke – First nun goes to confession. “Father I touched a penis while jostling through a crowd. It was an accident.” Father: “Wash your hands in the holy water and say ten Hail Marys.
        Second nun comes into the confessional: “Father I touched a penis. It wasn’t an accident but it was only for a second.” Father: “Wash your hands in holy water and say one hundred hair Marys.
        Back in the line the fourth nun whispers to the third nun “Can I go before you?” Third nun: “Sure, why?”
        Fourth nun: ” Because I dont want to gargle with the holy water after you have been sitting in it.”

        *Prolonged laughter from 12 yo boys*

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      “TOOK CLONAZEPAM DOSE THREE TIMES INSTEAD OF ONCE AND HAS A BATTERY IN RECTUM AND HAS NAUSEA”

      Are ass batteries a common side effect of Clonazepam?

  28. R C Dean

    Well, that was an exercise in Stoicism.

    Our cable modem was getting a little hunky – just hiccuping randomly. The (Xfinity) people ran checks from their end and said my signal’s fine, but there’s some kind of interference with the router. There has never been any interference with the router before and nothing has changed. Did a factory reset, made no difference. Damn thing (NetGear) is only six months old, but those hiccups cause Mrs. Dean issues with her WFH, so off to Best Buy to get a new one.

    I went with an Arris this time. Their app for “do everything through the app!” is ass. It doesn’t list my modem as supported, even though the instructions (which were literally “use the app”) said it was (and when I later downloaded the instructions for the app, said it was). So the app sent me to another app. Neither would establish a WiFi connection to my router, so they dead ended there. Even though it has an Ethernet connection to the router. I was able to just get Xfinity to light it up from their end, so we have internet again. Probably 45 minutes wasted, at least, on the Arris app.

    • Tres Cool

      “The (Xfinity) people ran checks from their end and said my signal’s fine, but there’s some kind of interference with the router.”

      Are you friends with Derpy ?

  29. Gustave Lytton

    Homemade whipped cream, whipped to the thickness of butter. The melting cream melds with a sip of hot coffee perfectly.

  30. Gustave Lytton

    Stupid automated work tool won’t purchase items with a total value over $20k. But does allow structuring multiple purchases of less than $20k against the same work order. My coffee does not contain whiskey, but should.

    • Evan from Evansville

      … *Daintily dances in* I have many intriguing ideas you may be keen to invest in, mister. They’ll free you from such pernicious burdens in the future. Just give me a call and I’m at your service. Cheers!

  31. Q Continuum

    ““I was working [in] a retail store and the first few hours were OK, then I had to deal with customers,” reads another. “I packed my bag and just left.””

    *clears throat*

    In the Carboniferous Epoch we were promised abundance for all,
    By robbing selected Peter to pay for collective Paul;
    But, though we had plenty of money, there was nothing our money could buy,
    And the Gods of the Copybook Headings said: “If you don’t work you die.”

  32. Q Continuum

    He was a disgraced failure in June and you all knew it, you were just such a pathetic bunch of ass-kissing, boot-licking supine rentboys that you would only countenance calling it out after he no longer has any power or influence in your criminal enterprise political party.

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