Liftoff, Dogs in Space

by | Feb 20, 2025 | Fiction, Things to Come | 83 comments

ROO ROO! cried Wednesday over the comm system, her voice seeming to shake the entire ship, as the Captain barked, “ ok Del, thank you for that, 5 minutes on.my…Mark!

Wednesday Delenda said far more in that bark than humans can hear, she was selected for the mission due to her nuanced speaking abilities. In this she said,

Engines, Go

Life support, Go

Dens secured, Go

Pups in stasis, Go

Take it away Max

The ship was a late model dual X fusion drive that ran on any matter that was injected, power being based on mass of course. Roughly dog boned shape with living quarters in front and drive in back, 300 meters long, and 6000 tons of frozen kibble ice for ablation up front, she could pull .75c but not this trip. After the discovery of the wormhole in the G ring of Saturn it became a 6 month cruise to Saturn then a jump that took 344 earth days, then 6 more months to the Gstar.

The humans that made the first return trip had no hibernation and on arrival back on earth only 2 survived. They did however make a fine survey of the system up close, revealing an anomaly we hadn’t seen in any exoplanetary observations, three earthlike planets in the same orbit. Two very much like home, green and temperate, slightly larger but not an issue for dogs. Planet three was tidally torn and rotating 46 degrees off of the ecliptic plane, it could spell trouble in the future, more calcs needed to be done.

Besides command there a total of 128 unfixed pairs representing all the major groups of dogs and 13 litters of pups, all in hibernation. The pups will be 6 months old when they awaken, ready to hunt. Elon sent a pack of 64 robodogs to help with the real ones, and supplies were fully stocked for several years.Command would stay awake until the wormhole, then climb into a hibernation den until Gleise.Captain Max made the call,”This is it friends, sniff your loved ones and pray, see you all soon”,5,4,3,2,1

”ROO ROO ROOOOO!“

Dogspeed, and may the Canidae prevail”

6 months later,

“Captain, 6 hours from the wormhole but I pcked up an anomaly on our six” yapped Pixie

Goat, tell me what you see, barked Max

“ need a millisecond Cut off to get a view in 5,4,3,2,1

, gimme a second,”

“Max, we have three Bereaved ships coming at .95c, 4 hours til contact, oh, weapons are at station”

Thanks, growled Max.”command room, now” 

Max headed down to see Cat, the only one who might make difference. “Cat, what do see? Fight or run?”

“Max,its too simple, of course you run, Now. We are more nimble and can run the wormhole faster than they”

puzzled, Max asked” how do you know?”

We don’t, was Cats response.

Knowing we had the resources we ran up to 1.2c for about5 minutes then coasted into the wormhole, safe? No. Engineer Tuppance came to me personally with the news, if we drive through hole at this rate we will be crushed beyond atoms, he took over propulsion for a bit and we were back on track, good dog.

We left the Bereavers far behind, and settled into our dens for a years nap, hoping to find a new home for all creatures.

Life finds a way

In space there is no smell,

Do dogs dream, oh yes,

But never dwell on the past,

Every day is fresh and magic,

My people, my treats,

They know

About The Author

Yusef drives a Kia

Yusef drives a Kia

Punctually illiterate But never late

83 Comments

    • Jarflax

      I’ll let someone else check that out.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I wouldnt recommend trying it

    • rhywun

      Lemme guess, you need a nose the size of Uranus to detect it.

    • Evan from Evansville

      I’d snort the fuck outta space. It’d be a different sort of null experience, but nothing is something in space!

      (A story, at least. Duh, I’d survive. You wouldn’t?!)

      • Not Adahn

        “Nothing” is a relative term. We run our ICP-MS tools at a pressure lower than you’d get if you stepped out of the airlock on the ISS (which is lower than low Earth orbit space) but higher than the pressure on the moon.

  1. kinnath

    The turtle says he is retiring in 2026.

    Joy

    • Suthenboy

      Bullshit. He will cling to power with his last breath like they all do. They will have to surgically remove his corpses grasping claws with an axe and a crowbar to dislodge him.

    • juris imprudent

      Dead-pool! I’ll hope for a Christmas present and take 12-25-25.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      If he lives that long. Drinking the blood of children has it’s limits.

  2. Suthenboy

    Two cultural changes that would usher in civilization: A. People are not born into servitude. Everyone owns themselves. B. Violence and fraud are not answers to problems.

    I bring this up because of the Danish links. Technology has eliminated the need or perceived need of slavery. Could we stop acting like monkeys already?

    I have been watching a lot of AI generated stuff and all of it seems to be made to appeal to our base nature. WTH guys? Clearly our future masters dont think very much of us.

    • R C Dean

      “I have been watching a lot of AI generated stuff”

      You should probably stop that.

      “all of it seems to be made to appeal to our base nature”

      Since AI is trained on the internet, what were you expecting? Hell, Reddit sold its data for AI training.

    • Plinker762

      Unfortunately that goes against human nature.

  3. R C Dean

    “Roughly dog bone shaped”

    Nice.

    • rhywun

      Woof!

  4. Evan from Evansville

    Thanks for this. I wonder what would happen if ‘I’ took a year-long ‘nap.’ Sci-fi tech aside, I imagine you’d age normally, but without exertion it would kinda be aging 9mo instead of 12? (Fully pulled those #s out my ass.) I guess I’ve traveled Mach ~.8. I’m with Jeremy Clarkson about the sadness of the Concorde going ‘extinct.’ Just lovely, balls-to-the-wall over-the-topittude.

    But Musk has an idea: “Elon Musk’s Boring Company has proposed a $20 billion underwater tunnel that would connect New York and London using Hyperloop technology. The tunnel would be over 3,000 miles long and could cut travel time from eight hours to under an hour.”

    (I fucking *LOVE* it’s called the Boring Company. *mwah* Life with a little wit attached.)

    • UnCivilServant

      What’s the plan for crossing the volcanic Atlantic rift where there’s frequent upwelling and magmatic uncursions? I wouldn’t feel comfortable being in a tunnel through an active volcano under an ocean.

      • kinnath

        Details, details, details.

        The engineers will figure that out after we win the contract.

      • Suthenboy

        There is no reason it would have to be on or under the ground/bottom. the tube could float. It is probably doable but like his mars dreams has no real cost benefit. Yeah, I could get to London in an hour but….why would I?

      • UnCivilServant

        To visit the Aloha Snackbar?

      • Evan from Evansville

        Magiksci. I suppose it could (also?) be for shipping. Or just MORE SPEEEEEED! and burst through it! (That works! Kinda! Sometimes!)

        Just on (old) Top Gear, James May was talking about carbon+titanium = Carbotanium. (Melting point 315 C – certainly light/strong enough, at least, but too melty near volcanoes I’d imagine.) “It’s a good thing they didn’t call it ‘titcobb.’ Do I want more titcobbs in my life? Possibly. To ‘perhaps’ or ‘most likely.’ (Must learn more.)

      • UnCivilServant

        such as tin, which melts at about 250 °C (482 °F), and copper, which melts at about 1,100 °C (2,010 °F), and the combination, bronze, which has a melting point lower than 1,083 °C (1,981 °F). In comparison, cast iron melts at about 1,375 °C (2,507 °F).[6]

        315°C is a lower melting point than my solder.

      • UnCivilServant

        Sorry, left off two data points:

        Lead 327 °C
        Silver 962 °C

      • Timeloose

        There is something called a eutectic point, Sn Pb solder with an alloy concentration ~40/60% will go from a liquid to a solid when cooling and a solid to a liquid while retaining the same phases both elements. In other words, a very repeatable and predictable alloy and crystal structure.

        Also at a lower melting point than the elements making up the alloy.

        https://phasediagram.weebly.com/eutectics.html

      • UnCivilServant

        My point was geared towards “a bit melty” being an understatement.

    • Sean

      It’s all fun and games until one of those giant mega sharks happens along. Or giant, prehistoric crocodiles.

      • The Other Kevin

        I disagree, if they make a film out of the incident, it might be described as a delightful romp.

  5. Toxteth O'Grady

    Avatar is currently Max and Roo Roo, if visible (I don’t know how to post one of my own pics otherwise).

    • slumbrew

      https://imgbb.com/ is handy – I like the ‘delete after’ feature.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Danke.

      • slumbrew

        Awww, cuties.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Aw, pretty pinto (pinta?).

        (TV Guide?! I had a relative who worked there. Didn’t know it’s still in print.)

      • slumbrew

        The TV Guide got some chuckles last time I posted that.

        No idea why she still gets that.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Cute ear markings.

  6. Not Adahn

    What happens when the dogs show up at the planet of The Weavers?

    • slumbrew

      It’ll be ruff.

      • The Other Kevin

        It would be quite a tail.

      • Evan from Evansville

        Get ready for Swiss’ bark.

      • The Other Kevin

        I’m not worried, he’s probably off having a growler.

    • R C Dean

      The Weavers put the ESP whammy on them and send them on their way?

      • Not Adahn

        Dog would seem to me more sensitive to empathic manipulation, true.

  7. Richard

    Greetings from North Nowhere Vermont. I’ve read headlines suggesting that Trump wants to reduce NOAA/NWS funding which makes me conflicted. On one hand the honestly I think that National Weather is deserving of National Attention. OTOH the NWS said last night’s low would be +4F while this morning one of my outdoor thermometers said -9F and the other -11F.[1] I anticipated a chilly but productive day at my office in town. Instead, not expecting my ATV to start, I spent a leisurely and indolent day at the cabin. So maybe Trump has a point.

    My small Vermont town is near Jay Peak which is having a near record snowfall so far:

    https://www.wcax.com/2025/02/19/jay-peak-snow-totals-track-set-seasonal-record/

    But Northern Vermont hasn’t had a serious thaw since New Year’s which was green:

    https://www.burlingtonfreepress.com/story/news/2025/02/18/vermont-snowstorm-burlington-airport-how-many-inches-fell-national-weather-service/79067351007/

    That article says the snow is the thickest since 2017 which seems about right. Earlier this season my neighbors and I were saying, “Yeah, there’s a lot of snow but we’ve seen worse.” It’s still true but we’re not saying that any more.

    Footnotes:

    [1] I can hear Fourscore’s derisive snort of scorn from here.

    • Fourscore

      Not too much snow here, we were bare as a baby’s butt when 2025 started. Got a few snows since but nothing major. OTOH the temps have been Ol’ Fashion winter style.

      Today is 20 and sunshine, dripping off the roof a little.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Colder than that in KY, today. Barely.

        We’re gonna top out in the low 20s this afternoon.

        But it will be in the mid 50s next week.

        So… Ha!

  8. Bobarian LMD

    Do space dogs dream of hyperspace rabbits?

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Yes they do

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      A haiku I remember from (of all places) the Archie McPhee catalog:

      Wiener dog wiener
      Small brown paws twitch in your sleep
      Get the squirrel! Go!

  9. The Other Kevin

    Kash Patel confirmed. This will be another fun one.

    The other day I had a thought, after I saw a few friends on FB say they want to protest and “create an army”. While Musk is doing a lot, he’s the “shiny object” right now. Tulsi, Bondi, Kennedy, Hegseth, and now Patel are all just getting started.

    • UnCivilServant

      I want to see prosecutions of FBI presonnel.

      We know many of them broke the law, throw the book at them.

      • The Other Kevin

        Related: The Republican Congress now has an agreeable DOJ, if they choose to hold someone in contempt. They’ve got teeth, let’s see if they use them.

    • Drake

      This should be fun.

    • Suthenboy

      Create an army….to what end?

      • The Other Kevin

        I can’t see anyone involved using violence, I think it’s more of an army of protestors.

        I made the mistake of commenting to one of them, which was a mistake. I’m holding back the urge to point out that if they’re talking this way on social media, and they can go outside and protest, they’re not living under a dictator. And that one of the first EO’s was to ban the government from engaging in censorship, as opposed to using the existing censorship regime to go after people like them.

        It sucks that the people many of us know and love are so batshit crazy we decide to tiptoe around certain subjects. If I acted like an insufferable asshole, would they tiptoe around me? I guess I’ll never find out, because I have no desire to act like an insufferable asshole.

      • Bobarian LMD

        That sounds more like an air force than an army.

      • pistoffnick (370HSSV)

        I have no desire to act like an insufferable asshole.

        Don’t knock it til you’ve tried it! It can be…freeing.

    • slumbrew

      “create an army”? That sounds insurrection-y.

      • The Other Kevin

        There are going to be a lot of cloths wiping hard drives, to be sure.

    • Evan from Evansville

      “I am absolutely sure of this one thing: this vote will haunt anyone who votes for him. They will rue the day they did it,” said Sen. Richard Blumenthal, a Connecticut Democrat.

      He added: “To my Republican colleagues, think about what you will tell your constituents” and family “about why you voted for this person who will so completely and utterly disgrace this office and do such grave damage to our nation’s justice system.”

      Fuck off, you terrified worm. The damage is purposeful and long-overdue.

    • Sean

      I’m gonna have to call my Dr. in about 4 hours.

      • The Other Kevin

        Stay hydrated, watch your electrolytes, and have a few extra carbs. If you need to, think about baseball or the queen.

    • kinnath

      I have passed cheerful and am approach giddy.

  10. Ed Wuncler

    OT:

    I watched a video of the Hamas parading the Bibas family coffins in Gaza and saw how many of the Gazans flocked to the streets to cheer this on like it’s some sort of victory.

    I used to have a lot of sympathy for the Palestinians believing that they were victims of their shitty governments and Israel’s “over” eagerness to fight the small group of terrorists. But now, I’ve realized that the Israelis have held a lot of restraint and considering their history of being attempted elimination am shocked that they haven’t gone justifiably apeshit on the Palestinians. I would give the Palestinian populace three options. Bend the knee, become a citizen with the full rights of an Israeli citizen if you renounce violence, leave the country, or face death. It’s no point in negotiating anymore because whenever you give them a ceasefire, they just use that time to rebuild their forces and commit more fuckery.

    • UnCivilServant

      I no longer have as much leniency as you propose.

    • slumbrew

      2 or 3 generations have grown up marinating in violent antisemitism provided by the authorities. I hate to say they’re beyond help but it sure seems that way.

      • kinnath

        Too much gangrene. Needs to be amputated.

    • Suthenboy

      Yes Ed. You are far more merciful than I am. As far as I. am concerned the time for talking ended Oct. 7, 2023. They have to go. No more playing this game. First the Iranians have to pay and pay dearly. This is all their doing. The Ayatollah get snuffed, the Revolutionary Guard turned to ash. Then I would forward my terms. Terms to the Palestinians are: Go to Iran or die. Today. Pack your shit and get gone.
      Enough of this murderous, evil game that never ends. The rules up to now are out and the new rule is peace by whatever means necessary.

    • The Other Kevin

      The big problem is they are bringing up their children in their ways of hate. I’m certain there were Palestinian kids at that event. And we’ve all see parents holding their kids dressed as suicide bombers and holding AK’s. It’s not just a few bad actors, they’ve created an entire culture of terrorists. So what do you do about that? This is also why other countries don’t want to accept them. Who wants that type of culture in their country?

      • Suthenboy

        Let the Iranians deal with them. They payed for that…of course with money Obama/Biden gave them…but let them handle it.

  11. RAHeinlein

    Has anyone tried the Grok 3 beta on X? I’ve been playing with some technical questions and deep-dives – the responses far surpass anything I’ve seen with other AI.

    • The Other Kevin

      I’ll have to try that. The previous Grok was really good.

    • Sean

      I asked it to compare my two vehicles and which was the best one. It got some technical details wrong about the engine in the Jeep. Otherwise it was interesting to see it try.

  12. juris imprudent

    At today’s prices, that much egg on that many faces is some serious money.

    “As economists from around the world who are supportive of broad-based economic development in Argentina, we are especially concerned by the economic program of one of the candidates, which has become a major issue of discussion in the national election,” the letter read.

    • Jarflax

      I stopped reading at “Javier Milei’s economic proposals are presented as a radical departure from the traditional economic thinking,” the economists wrote. “…we believe that these proposals, rooted in laissez-faire economics and involving contentious ideas like dollarization and significant reductions in government spending, are fraught with risks… . “

      They didn’t get it wrong; they lied to defend their sinecures.