IFLA: The “___” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of March 9

by | Mar 9, 2025 | IFLA | 41 comments

This has been kind of a terrible week for my bullshitting creative astrologically interpretative abilities. Which is doubly unfortunate since it’s also goal-setting week at work. I keep trying to get enough sleep and failing. My doctor had me wear a sleep monitor last night, which prevented me from going to sleep. Fortunately I had previously written the stages for Winter Steel so at least that’s done.

But you’re not here to read about how my life sucks you’re here because there’s no other new content at this time of the week to hear about how much the skies suck! And hoo boy, do they ever.

The problem is Venus retrogade. It’s mean, nasty, bitchy, vicious and with us for another couple of weeks. It’s also between us and the Sun which means it can stick around with other inner planet alignments for longer than most, amplifying its cuntey influence. In this case it’s hooking up with that rascal Mercury from today until Thursday (for you people with horizon views, the conjunction should be pretty spectacular) and after only a day’s respite, grabs the Moon. If it makes you appreciate things, next week should be even worse.

Prophetic: “Where man can’t walk or freely talk, and sons turn their fathers in.”


Pisces: 9 of Coins reversed – There’s a rich bitch and she doesn’t like you.

Aries: 4 of Coins reversed – Your personality flaw keeps you out of trouble for once.

Taurus: The Hermit – Stay inside. Avoid people.

Gemini: The World — That thing with The Hermit? Do the opposite.

Cancer: 6 of Swords reversed – You may find this implausible, but this card refers to weapons and a boating accident.

Leo: 2 of Cups reversed – A particualrly unpleasant betrayal or failure on another human’s part.

Virgo: 5 of Swords reversed – Humiliations galore. And not in a good way.

Libra: Temperance Reversed – Kick loose.

Scorpio: 9 of Wands – Do your job. It’s going to suck, but you’ll be successful.

Sagittarius: 4 of Swords – Something happens at night.

Capricorn: Page of Coins – Someone you relied on or had a request for comes through.

Aquarius: The Moon – Nighttime fun times.

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

41 Comments

  1. Gustave Lytton

    The stars may be aligned, but not the clocks.

  2. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: 4 of Swords – Something happens at night.

    *braces chair against closet door*

  3. The Late P Brooks

    Last night I ended up watching a couple of old Charlie Chan movies on tubi. One of them came with a content advisory about outmoded racial/cultural insensitivity. The best part was the scene where Chan is at the dinner table with his mob of hep cat teenagers acting white.

    • R.J.

      Fantastic.

      I just watched the first of the two Bulldog Drummond 1960s spy films. I am posting it this week. I just found the other on YouTube.

      • Ted S.

        Interesting. I think I’ve only seen the Ronald Colman Bulldog Drummond.

    • Grummun

      We have The Mysterious Mr. Wong (1935) on DVD, starring Bela Lugosi as the nefarious title character. It is thick with casual racism. My favorite bit is this exchange between the intrepid reported and his editor:

      “You ever hear of a chinaman named Wong?”

      “Have I ever heard of a chinaman NOT named Wong?”

      • Tres Cool

        How long is a chinese name.

  4. Sean

    “ Cancer: 6 of Swords reversed – You may find this implausible, but this card refers to weapons and a boating accident.”

    No sex on boats this week. Got it.

    • Spudalicious

      Someone’s going to lose all their guns in a boating accident.

      • Suthenboy

        Again? Goddammit.

      • Fourscore

        Too late! That boat has left the pier.

    • Ted S.

      No sex off boats for you, either. :-p

      • Sean

        #fakenews

    • Aloysious

      Be safe. Just drink light beer.

  5. Suthenboy

    Cash said he was Cherokee. *looks at Johnny’s face* No shit. Next you will tell me water is wet.
    Warren says she is….something Indian. *Looks at Liz’s face.* Really? I am a flying reindeer with a glowing red nose.

    • Tres Cool

      Awesome- put in a good word for me with the Big Guy.
      For Christmas I want a Traeger Pro 22 smoker.

      kthnx

  6. Don escaped Memphis

    Foundation for Economic Education @feeonline

    “Morally, protectionism is vicious because it coercively substitutes the ill-informed and ill-directed judgment of government officials for the judgment of people making deals with their own private property.” – Robert Higgs

    • R C Dean

      It’s hard to invoke the Invisible Hand unless both parties to a transaction are making deals based on their private interests. When one party is a government, or is controlled by/beholden to/influenced by a government, where does that leave the Invisible Hand? If a private party is enticed to do a deal because a government induces it to based on its non-market interests, is that even a “free market” transaction?

  7. Mojeaux

    Taurus: The Hermit – Stay inside. Avoid people.

    Why is this different from any other day?

    • UnCivilServant

      “You can’t run, you might represent the people”

  8. rhywun

    Your personality flaw

    lol Just one? That’s a relief.

    • R C Dean

      Yeah, I was thinking “you’re going to have to be more specific”.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    I just watched the first of the two Bulldog Drummond 1960s spy films.

    I had no idea there was a ’60s version of Drummond.

  10. Mojeaux

    My mom’s room (at my house) is starting to pull together. She’s being discharged from skilled nursing on the 19th. She is SOOOOOOO much better! She’s walking by herself (with a walker, natch), but she does need some conditioning. She can shower by herself as long as she can sit. She can do her bathroom things and dress herself.

    We will still have private PT come and help her with further strengthening when she gets home. She’ll be able to get around the house and do her laundry and get her breakfast.

    The only real problem is she’s got some serious lymph/edema going on, but I told her we’ll go see a massage therapist. She asked me if they were going to come to her, and I told her, no, we’ll be going there amd she will be getting on the table (with help).

    All she needed was some time and patience and TLC, with no cunty sisters and asshole PCP angrily demanding that she get off her ass and get better and come home. Yes, they were as bad as I make them sound.

    • Fourscore

      Hi Moj

      Sounds like some progress is being made, your Mom needs her independence, with some caveats, of course. Walker/sit down shower, etc.

      I use a walker at night, a sit down bench in the shower, handicapped shower. Mrs F uses the stair lift, a cane when she goes outside. These are pretty normal concessions.

      Old folks still want to take care of themselves, as much as possible, anyway.

      Good for your Mom!

      • Mojeaux

        I’m really proud of her, but I can’t discount the effect of having gotten out of that house has had on her. She’s laughing, happy, and has hope again.

        The apartment she’s settled on has a walk-in shower in one of the rooms, so we won’t even have to deal with a bathtub.

        She’s looking forward to living by herself again.

      • Fourscore

        Good on the walk in shower, that’s what we have.

        Good news all the way around, now just have to settle/solve the house division

      • Mojeaux

        I’m trying to look at it as, now that we don’t HAVE to have the money to pay for long-term care, it can take as long as it takes. I guess.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Yes, they were as bad as I make them sound.

    Energy vampires.

    • Mojeaux

      Barring the property issue, what really made me mad was that the first thing Millie was concerned about (before we even got Mom out the door to the hospital on Jan 4) was how they were going to pay the mortgage for February.

      At NO time did either of them ask me how she was actually doing. It was all about money, the bills, the property. Then when they talked to HER, it was to demand she (and her PCP) “put in the work” to get better, as if she could do PT when she could barely open her eyes. They just berated her and demanded and never asked her how she was feeling, or even opened their eyes to SEE she was barely hanging on.

      It was ALL about THEM. What she could do for THEM. Why she wasn’t coming home to take care of THEM. How she needed to work harder for THEM. Not one word of concern FOR HER.

  12. Evan from Evansville

    Blank Space is one of two Swift songs I legit like. For what it’s trying to be, it does it damn well. Catchy and works. Oddly, I *like* the video. It adds sense to it.

    We’re about the same age. She’s a very good businesswoman. Would jam with.

    • Mojeaux

      Likewise, I admire her business savvy*, and I have no issue with her. With the exception of AutoTune, she’s no different from any other mega pop star ever.

      * Okay, her dad’s and she had daddy’s money to fall back on, but she has to have learned a few things since. She doesn’t seem to have stage parents. She’s not broken, not bound up in conservatorship, not making insane Insta and TikTok vids that prove her to have had a reason to be in a conservatorship, and hasn’t got kids that she’s either lost custody of or shuffled off to nannies to rear. Looking at you, Britney Spears.

  13. Evan from Evansville

    “Taurus: The Hermit – Stay inside. Avoid people.” Well, I sank into the hermit phase long ago. Carmel absolutely does not help that. That big high school I mentioned? It’s a half mile away and some Colts use their facilities for off-season training. I’m surrounded by snobby swank.

    Work is going oddly well, and largely *does* involve avoiding people. A couple people asked me where shit was, my answers vague, but that’s it. “See task. Do task. Here’s new task. Repeat.” In an odd way, it’s just like phlebotomy, in that DAMN time goes by fast. Paycheck in a week will hopefully help breech my hermit kingdom.

    • Fourscore

      When I worked retail and a customer would ask about something my standard answer was “Is this a quiz?” Then I would take them to the location but they were on their own to find it, often they would find more things that they were interested in.

      • Evan from Evansville

        Walmart’s system is remarkably efficient. It plots a path for you to take you as linearly as possible to pick up the orders displayed on my screen. Ir’s predictably good. They also employ 1.6M in the US alone, so, they have lots of data.

        Also efficiently, and more to the point, if I pick up ‘Chilled’ or ‘Frozen’ things, the system enacts a 45min cutoff period. If you go over, the handheld summons you back to the fridges in the back, for the rest to be picked up by… someone. So maybe half the time I have a time limit, (I don’t get punished), but I’ve been as helpful as I can be. I also haven’t memorized/ learned all the aisle numbers and what they contain.

        There was a dude shoppin’ ’round yesterday in shorts, with two titanium letgs, at least from knee on down. Were I in Peru Tribune mode, I’da started a conversation immediately. I almost thought about saying something, with my hips not feeling ‘great,’ but I (probably wisely) didn’t.

    • Evan from Evansville

      What moron buys that and thinks the cat is actually gonna *use* it? Useful Idiots, their money soon to be parted.

      Oh. For their damn lazy children? Well, then. I strongly approve.