How to Think Like a Roman Emperor
If you have anger issues, this one is a great tool (h/t mindyourbusiness)
This week’s book:
Discourses and Selected Writings
Disclaimer: I’m not your Supervisor. These are my opinions after reading through these books a few times.
Epictetus was born a slave around 50 ad. His owner was Epaphroditus, a rich freedman who was once a slave of Nero. Though he was a slave Epictetus was sent to study philosophy under Musonius Rufus.
Epictetus was lame and there are some stories it was caused by his master and others that it was caused by disease.
He was a freedman when all philosophers were banished from Rome in 89 by the Emperor Domitian. He then started his school in Greece, and had many students. He did not leave any writings from his lessons, but one of his students, Flavius Arrian, took notes and wrote the Discourses.
Epictetus did not marry, had no children, and lived to be around 80-85. In retirement, he adopted a child that would have been abandoned and raised him with a woman.
He died sometime around AD 135.
He is my favorite Stoic teacher. I love his bare bones and very straight forward approach.
Following is a paragraph-by-paragraph discussion of one of his lessons. Epictetus’s text appears in bold, my replies are in normal text.
That we ought not to yearn for the things which are not under our control Part IX
What, then, is the proper discipline for this? In the first place, the highest and principal discipline, and one that stands at the very gates of the subject, is this: Whenever you grow attached to something, do not act as though it were one of those things that cannot be taken away, but as though it were something like a jar or a crystal goblet, so that when it breaks you will remember what it was like, and not be troubled.
I try not to be attached to possessions, but I think I make an exception for my house and truck. My house is the first really nice one I have owned and we have had a great 8 years here so far. Losing the house would be a heavy blow. After all the time, money, and work I have put into making my old truck very nice vehicle, I am sure it would hurt my feelings if it ever gets totaled.
85So too in life; if you kiss your child, your brother, your friend, never allow your fancy free rein, nor your exuberant spirits to go as far as they like, but hold them back, stop them, just like those who stand behind generals when they ride in triumph, and keep reminding them that they are mortal.[14] In such fashion do you too remind yourself that the object of your love is mortal; it is not one of your own possessions; it has been given you for the present, not inseparably nor for ever, but like a fig, or a cluster of grapes, at a fixed season of the year, and that if you hanker for it in the winter, you are a fool. If in this way you long for your son, or your friend, at a time when he is not given to you, rest assured that you are hankering for a fig in winter-time. For as winter-time is to a fig, so is every state of affairs, which arises out of the universe, in relation to the things which are destroyed in accordance with that same state of affairs.
It is easy to think this way, but harder to live it out in practice. Losing my mother a year ago and my dog 2 years ago really hit me with the reality of losing important parts of my life. In a strange way as time has passed losing my mom hurts more. We went home for vacation and it was still strange to not hear her voice in the mornings. She would always wake up before us when we were visiting and would call out good morning when she heard us coming down the stairs. Life goes on and dwelling on the past or being resentful of changes is unproductive.
Furthermore, at the very moment when you are taking delight in something, call to mind the opposite impressions. What harm is there if you whisper to yourself, at the very moment you are kissing your child, and say, “To-morrow you will die”? So likewise to your friend, “To-morrow you will go abroad, or I shall, and we shall never see each other again”?—Nay, but these are words of bad omen.—Yes, and so are certain incantations, but because they do good, I do not care about that, only let the incantation do us good. But do you call any things ill-omened except those which signify some evil for us?
I tried to have this attitude with my mom, she was fighting cancer and every time I saw her she was less and less mobile, so there was no surprise that she died. The only surprise was that she went downhill so quickly in her last week, but that is better than a long drawn out painful end.
Cowardice is ill-omened, 90a mean spirit, grief, sorrow, shamelessness; these are words of ill-omen. And yet we ought not to hesitate to utter even these words, in order to guard against the things themselves. Do you tell me that any word is ill-omened which signifies some process of nature? Say that also the harvesting of ears of grain is ill-omened, for it signifies the destruction of the ears; but not of the universe. Say that also for leaves to fall is ill-omened, and for the fresh fig to turn into a dried fig, and a cluster of grapes to turn into raisins. For all these things are changes of a preliminary state into something else; it is not a case of destruction, but a certain ordered dispensation and management. This is what going abroad means, a slight change; this is the meaning of death, a greater change of that which now is, not into what is not, but into what is not now.—Shall I, then, be no more?—No, you will not be, but something else will be, something different from that of which the universe now has need.[15] And this is but reasonable, for you came into being, not when you wanted, but when the universe had need of you.
We all die eventually and being frightened of this is just being frightened of reality. While I have not faced death directly, I have been in situations where it was a distinct possibility. In the heat of combat there was no thought given to this fact and sometimes afterwards we would be surprised that we all made it through and then feel the reality of what had occurred.
Sorry about missing last week, but my step dad and I had a good night drinking beer and reminiscing. The next day we spent 6 hours tearing out the old deck so my sister in law could move her pool over. We got a lot of work done and it was good to work alongside him again, it had been awhile.
Had many opportunities to practice my Stoicism these past couple of weeks. My brother, his wife and 2 daughters have moved into the old farmhouse with my step dad. She is an interior decorating person and the house looks completely different. I still call it “Mom’s house” but in reality it is now “Jodie’s house”. I am surprised my step dad let her change so many things, but if he is happy than I have no right to be upset. Talking to my other brother we both agree that it is weird being in that house but there is no point in complaining.
Next I drove to work on Monday after getting in on Sunday and my car was low on gas. It said that I had 60 miles until empty. My wife had challenged the gauge a few times and always made it so I figured it would get me there. My trip to work was 40 miles and the WaWa was only a couple miles from there. I made it to work and at the end of the day headed straight to the WaWa. I ran out about a quarter mile from the store. Because of my lack of preparation for Monday’s work, I got to walk a half mile in the rain. I managed to look at it as a lesson to not be unprepared to drive to work. On the bright side the car fired right up and the whole thing only cost me about a half hour.
Then Monday night I couldn’t sleep because my sinuses were not happy with the changing weather. When I woke up Tuesday and turned on the light, the pain was so intense I could not open my right eye. I thought trying to drive to work like that was not a good idea, so I called off, something I hate doing, but there was no reason to be upset, instead I was grateful I had enough PTO where missing a day wouldn’t be an issue.
Once upon a time alcohol and I were very good friends but we had a nasty falling out and dont speak anymore.
Alcohol withdrawal is both physical and psychological. One of the psychological symptoms is the sudden onset of a strong sense of doom and dread. It does not go away. You dont know what the cause of the feeling is but you feel, notice I say feel, it is bad. You feel on the edge of panic all of the time. Even a small amount of alcohol will make it go away. Instead I just ignored it. I knew the cause was alcohol withdrawal so I just ignored it and kept plugging along doing things. It could be mitigated by accomplishing something….anything at all no matter how small.
I just ignored it and kept plugging away.
I am told that that feeling is one of the most difficult parts of quitting drinking. It is the biggest factor causing people to fail.
Once I had gotten past that I think I gained my official stoic badge.
I made that trip 40 years ago. After a few days/weeks believing I could climb the walls and cross the ceiling with my new fingernails things got better.
Everything got better, family, domestic life, the job. I looked forward to going to work, enough that my production.
Quitting smoking a few years before that helped as well. I would not be Ol’ Fourscore if I had continued down the same path. Now my non-stoicism is directed
towards a solution rather than anger. Thanks Ron
…that my production was noticed by TPTB….
I’ve never felt the need to quit, and although looking back I did drink a lot,(6 pack on weeknights and a 12 or more Friday and Saturday pretty much every day) when I went to Iraq and Afghanistan there was no withdrawal.
Congratulations on making it over that hurdle, it sounds like an ordeal.
I know this is off topic and might be comment number two, but it’s been 45 minutes.
My pepper plant is approaching the size where I’m supposed to transplant it to a larger pot. So far I’ve been using the color of the paper starter pot it’s in to help me determine how much water to give it. (The water soaks into the paper and darkens it based on how much is in the soil). The larger pot is terra cotta and doesn’t show the water level so readily.
Does anyone have easy recommendations on how to figure out the moisture level deeper down (below the surface)?
Put the pot in another larger vessel with something underneath. Gravel, rocks, pottery, etc Watch the bottom area for signs of too much water as the excess will drain off and you can dump it. I have 18 apple trees, in 4 ” peat pots growing in my window, biggest is about 14″. If I see any excess water I hold back.
I’m more concerned about waiting too long between waterings. The new pot can hold about a cubic foot of soil, which means it can drink a lot of water, and I have no experience with what’s a good volume.
That works. There use to be little terra cotta sticks you could put in the pot, when the top of the stick was light you added water. It would be darker when you had plenty of water deep down.
All Amazon shows me are battery powered gimcracks.
I don’t think this is what you meant but makes me think.
They were solid, like little straws. I think somebody made fancy glass ones with some liquid that changed color too. No doubt banned as causing cancer in the state of California.
🤔
Might these be repurposed to the same effect?
You’re over thinking this.
Of course I’m overthinking it, I’m me.
And this is the most successful plant I’ve yet raised from seed.
Are you new here Sean?
Hi, I’m Juris and I’m an over-thinker.
https://www.amazon.com/SZHLUX-Moisture-Monitor-Hygrometer-Outdoor/dp/B09VC2825P?th=1
Never really felt the need, but not expensive.
Pay attention to how much water you give in when in the paper starter pot. Then, when you transplant to the terra cotta pot, use the same amount of water. As the plant grows, you will need to increase this, but by this point the plant itself will give signs of too much or too little water (does it wilt, does it show signs of over watering, etc.)
https://www.amazon.com/Fertilizer-Supplement-Bloom-Concentrated-Makes-180/dp/B073ZNW8MX
Don’t forget to feed your plant.
https://www.amazon.com/FoxFarm-Liquid-Nutrient-Trio-Formula/dp/B07TH2FMP3
If you feel like spending more money…
Speaking of being Stoic, Snow White as a 1.6 on IMDB. The reviewers were more than fair in delivering 1/10. Wow.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt6208148/reviews/
The important thing is that it ISN’T because it’s woke.
Paywall – https://www.businessinsider.com/disney-snow-white-opening-weekend-box-office-woke-backlash-controversy-2025-3
The important thing is that it ISN’T because it’s woke.
Of course not, it’s because the audience is a bunch of racist rubes!
Who don’t understand the real beauty of Rachel against the gaudy Gal.
This guy did a pretty good take down of it and it was super easy, barely an inconvenience.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0nSFVT-hs0
All the reviews on IMDB were balanced. None of them really mentioned “woke.” They mentioned that all the joy and innocence was sucked out of Snow White, that characters stopped mid-scene and delivered diatribes like Bond villains, and that everything which made the original a delight was just – removed. Not to mention the dwarves were now called “magical creatures,” which was odd.
The value of my current house, and memories of prior ones, is based more on the family memories made there than the construction features. Same to a lesser degrees with cars. As I’ve traded in old ones, I find myself thinking about road trips and driving kids places.
That’s what is so jarring about the painting, decorating, and removing all the pictures my mom had hung.
It doesn’t feel like the same house anymore.
I just moved. I had to remove everything that made my prior house a home and just leave blank, refinished walls and floors. After almost 17 years it felt wrong.
The new house doesn’t feel like home yet either. Feels like a hotel or something.
I don’t have a home, I have a house I’m using as a holding pattern until I decide where I want to live.
*Texas waves
Or, if you move to Houston, Texas weaves.
I’m very territorial with my possessions. They’re MINE and I resent when someone destroys something I’ve taken care of for 30 years when I’ve been kind enough to loan it out *koff XY koff*. If my house burned down, I’d be inconsolable.
I don’t consider my kids MINE. I’m not their master or servant. I’m their steward. I’m not having as hard a time letting them go as other people, I don’t think, but harder than I thought I would because they’re not flying the direction I had envisioned. Now that they’re spreading their wings, I’m seeing just how narrow my worldview really is. I also think about what my parents must have felt when I and my brothers made our life choices. To cope, I remember the shit I did/do (my mother heartily disapproves of what I write), and hope my kids are more adventurous and less stupid about it.
I have very strong feelings about property.
I feel weird even using someone else’s stuff because it’s theirs, and I’m afraid of damaging it. On the flip side, I do not like anyone touching my stuff.
*nods sagely*
As for kids leaving the nest, I was the least dramaful departure, and neither of my parents have spoken about expectations. Not sure what they thought on the matter. Can’t speak to the parental perspective.
I was glad to see your mom is improving and the cunty aunt situation is getting resolved.
As far as kids growing up I try to ignore the bumps and look at the destination.
Still trying to get the last one on his own, but the other 2 are doing well and seem happy.
I hope the same can be said for yours.
We can’t possibly see the destination for our children unless they die before us. We can only get glimpses of the path they’re on and maybe see when they stumble.
I feel the same way about this ring I got for my birthday. It is…precious to me.
I’m struggling with being stoic this past few weeks. I’ve been working my self too hard, feeling like one day to the next is the same day, and neglecting those around me. Too many of my day to day activities have been negative (looking for several problems root causes with too little information, trying to contain the issues, then looking for long term corrective actions). I think I need to take the rest of the day off and do something that will allow me to have a goal with a clear defined end and get it accomplished.
I need an optimism boost and I will seek one this weekend, I could get a motorcycle ride in on Sat if I play my cards right.
I’m going to go home and clean my house. This will meet the above need for accomplishment as well as make Mrs. Time happy.
I tried to log in to Glibs Zoomies on Wednesday night but my garage PC was eating some sort of update in the background and shot that impulse down. I’ll see if I can make it tonight.
I’m hoping to get in a bike ride tomorrow morning to burn off some work stress.
Not sure of the rain that’s headed my way will be in your area tomorrow too.
UCS:
It’s here now. Currently there’s a small chance of showers predicted for tomorrow evening, so morning to afternoon should be clear. Plan to lube up and check the bikes after work today so that they’ll just need tires inflated before getting on the road.
You know, you would feel MUCH better if you epoxied your garage floor with sprinkles.
I looked into doing some floor epoxy recently. It might be in the future, but there is too much shit in there right now. You might have convinced me.
“…I’ve been working my self too hard, feeling like one day to the next is the same day, and neglecting those around me. Too many of my day to day activities have been negative (looking for several problems root causes with too little information, trying to contain the issues, then looking for long term corrective actions). ”
…Long lost brother!
*Waves
Same.
Once baseball season started, I’m constantly on the move. No free time to unwind or do something for myself. I haven’t been at home during dinner time in 2 weeks, and everyday there isn’t a game I’m working late. My sleep schedule is fucked and I’m goddamn exhausted.
I’d say that I’m going to take a day this weekend but can’t. Can’t take a day for a while, and that upsets me.
I cleaned the upstairs and bathrooms. I’m feeling much better. I needed a token accomplishment to end my 60 hour work week.
One thing that.. surprised isn’t the right word, but works, when my wife started working from home during the great covidiacy, was how she would stop in the middle of the day and bake a cake or storm into the kitchen and start making dinner at 3 in the afternoon.
Turns out, she just wanted something she could start and finish in a finite amount of time.
Sure hope rain is headed for upstate SC this weekend.
I do not like anyone touching my stuff.
Lighten up, Francis.
You just made the list, buddy!
And this is but reasonable, for you came into being, not when you wanted, but when the universe had need of you.
The universe should ask for a refund.
“Life handed us a paycheck/
we said, we worked harder than this!
PLEASE! Bury me WITH IT!”
Huh, Captain Planet was more violent than I remembered:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak0sgAaHFtY
Anything to convince people that capitalists are evil. That show is going to go over like a lead balloon today. Which is good.
I still say that Don Cheadle’s Captain Planet “parody” was genius.
This just might be reaching peak Chrysler.
Some Geniuses Are Adding A Gear To Their Jeep Transmissions With A $50 Junkyard Part
🙂
There will never be peak Jeep.
Pollution for its own sake
Jason Rylander, a lawyer for another environmental group, the Center for Biological Diversity, called the EPA’s actions ridiculous and one more demonstration that the Trump administration wants to help polluters, not protect the environment.
“It is an enormous stretch to suggest that there’s some national interest in giving industry the right to pollute. That doesn’t make sense to me,” he said.
——-
“In my view, we’re in the middle of a climate emergency,’’ Rylander said. “But in the Trump administration’s view, we have this fictitious national energy emergency that may provide a basis for (Trump) to claim this is somehow in the national security interests of the United States.”
Electricity comes out of the wall.
Well, that just goes to show you’re a fucking idiot, now doesn’t it?
Fuck off. And stop lying by omission by making people think it is a blanket 100% exemption. It’s a rollback of excessive regulations that have strangled us for years.
Sorry, lost my Stoic.
Exemptions offered this week also could apply to more than 200 chemical plants nationwide that are being required to reduce toxic emissions likely to cause cancer. The rule, issued last year, advanced the former president’s commitment to environmental justice by delivering critical health protections for communities burdened by industrial pollution from ethylene oxide, chloroprene and other dangerous chemicals, the Biden administration said.
They drive around in big tank trucks fogging the poor people like mosquitos.
I thought they were using chemtrails
Jarfax if you are looking at the nooner: What I meant by If all organizations are doomed to fail, then no organization is doomed to fail is that using the term “fail” is wrong, mainly because the idea that all organizations are doomed to fail means that they have a finite lifespan, which in turn means they didn’t fail anymore than a mans body fails when he dies of old age. And this is born out by every organization “dying ” in the end.
And this isn’t something novel here either, at least it shouldn’t be. A human creation, whether that is a body of cells, or a body of citizens, is just that: an organization. They have a life span and at the end of it, they stop functioning. Now, if this is cellular cancer, or bad leadership, it doesn’t matter, both have come to the end of its life span.
This is why I used Entropy in my final sentence.
If the US should keep sea lanes free because we can and also because it’s good, does that gives us the right to charge other countries for that service? And if so, how do we make them pay and avoid the free rider problem?
I’m all for commerce and I also think fire insurance is a fair model. I’d much rather see NATO change its mission to defending freedom of navigation.
Another question is: can the US keep sea lanes free? There seems to be some doubt about that.
Can the US keep sea lanes free?
Yes. If we have the will and are willing to spend the blood and treasure to do so. We also could have made Iraq the 51st state of the union but did not. For the same reason.
Therefore, we probably should not take on that mission.
OT: I was reading about the construction of the Shinkansen speed train in Japan out of curiosity and something that struck me was that when there was a budget short fall, the guy who ran the train system and was heading its construction, took responsibility and resigned.
Today in the U.S. we see our public projects and initiatives go waaaaay over budget on top of mismanagement, but no one ever takes responsibility and if anything, will demand more money for their short fall and incompetence. What makes me angry especially with the Democrats is that this is a feature for any bullshit public project they do but are unwilling to concede that the waste of public money for something that may never materialize (cough cough Cali speed train) is fucking immoral and should be stopped at every opportunity.
That responsibility is very cultural. Even now Japan expects more functionality from government than we do.
The downside is a level of conformity I could never tolerate.
That said Japan has no shortage of pork and cost overruns.
Yes. Also important, – in addition to their homogeneity – is that Japan (and Korea) are *new* to ‘democracies.’ Every Korean president but ONE has been imprisoned, assassinated, or had his execution stayed. Citizens there take things seriously, IMO, largely because they haven’t had the ~250 years we’ve had for the State to metastasize, expand, and corrupt its bureaucracy, culture, and the nation itself.
Japan is likely similar, though to perhaps a lesser extent, but 95% of people in Korea are straight-up, grandparents upon grandparents down, Korean. Only ~1% are Westerners. (Weiguks, compared to Gaijin in Japan.) It’s impossible to divorce that divide and compare such nations to America. Fools do so when they’re paid to, equal folly on all sides.
It gets worse than that when you realize that (through USAID) there was a very good chance we were both paying for the train, and paying to fight against the train.
Ugh.
fedgov is a money laundering organization. Churn is just part of the cover story.
What makes me angry especially with the Democrats is that this is a feature for any bullshit public project they do but are unwilling to concede that the waste of public money for something that may never materialize (cough cough Cali speed train) is fucking immoral and should be stopped at every opportunity.
The completely incalculable social benefits of these projects will far outweigh the negligible costs.
They Loved Their Teslas. Now They’re Too Embarrassed to Drive Them.
Paywall: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/28/nyregion/tesla-backlash-divestment.html
I swear to God I might have to buy a new Tesla just to spite them even though I’m perfectly happy with my 5.5 year old one.
I swear to God I might have to buy a new Tesla just to spite them even though I’m perfectly happy with my 5.5 year old one.
Be sure to mount the Nazi staff car flags on the front fenders.
It will look cooler that way!
Thankfully, I don’t remember my close encounter with Death. (Your brain’s pretty good at turning the Memory Switch off when shit gets real. It’s got plenty of other important work to deal with, and remembering it wouldn’t do you any favors.
I do remember rehab and relearning who my family was. (I thought Bro and Mom were *exceptionally* well-trained actors when they came to see me in Chiang Mai.)
My rehab stints were the best test of what stoicism I possess, by learning to take things slow. With my hips, perhaps especially. You can’t dictate your leg heal on your own time. It has to do it’s own thing, and you have to fucking accept it. If you don’t, your recovery is going to be significantly shittier. Though the painstaking *BOREDOM* of needing to sit still, no walking, with bed pans at best for a couple weeks straight. Learning to accept that helped me recover the way I did. (Physically. Psychologically? Well. Different story. I’ve had to learn to accept parts of my brain damage. Work in progress.)
But ya learn to adapt from that. Once you get Acceptance out of the way, the rest of a recovery is a distinctly *positive* rebuilding process. You can do more with your body today than you could yesterday. Solid day’s work, for your body. If you focus on what you *can’t* do, things you *used to* without thought, you will spiral further into depression and despair.
Dad is a terrible patient. I’m glad I’m persistently chipper, as it naturally revealed that pleasant wards get better treatment than the sour ones. I made a point to be extra cheerful, complimentary, and simply, *not a pain.* I got bonus rewards! (No. No hot Korean /Thai, etc nurses to administer therapeutic relief services to this patient. (Phooey.)) I DID get pleasant nurses who’d hook me up with extra food, and especially important, broke policy and would fetch me 2-3am food to sate me.
Acceptance is the most difficult to learn, and to be truthful, I’m terrified of it. I don’t want to spiral downward to a place where I merely *accept* the shitty aspects of my life and the world because shit’s always shitty and that’s just the way shit is. Shithead. <– Constant vigilance. Such brevity explaining so much. Gotta learn to accept, but always rebel against stagnation. Accept age will weather you down, but don't quit walking cuz 'It's always gonna get worse.' (Well. It is. But it isn't. Let battle commence!)
Dammit, Ev. It didn’t look that long on the screen.
(Oooh. We could be talking ’bout a damn good wiener! Surprises with girth in tumescent splendor! Be gentle, no need to drag me *through* the garden. No tomatoes for me, please … I don’t want such unnecessary lubrication on my dog. Just bite ’til it pops.)