While playing ball, I put a professional baseball player in the ER. I was 10. Well? He shouldn’t have soft-tossed me like that.
My dad was a columnist for the Evansville Courier for 40 years. He had five columns a week and could fill it with pretty much anything. He never covered politics, no police beat, and stopped being a sports reporter a decade before. He wrote human interest stories, though I dislike that term. He found average people and would get a story out of ‘em. Jockeys, criminals, farmers, skydivers, Civil War cannon-owners and plenty more. Dad brought me along so I could try things out and experience anything new. I had an exceptional childhood. He was also one of my baseball coaches.
His professional work and interests led him to befriend some of the Evansville Otters.
The Evansville Otters are a Frontier League baseball team. They’re professional but they’re not part of the MLB minor leagues. They use wooden bats. Their ability? Think of really good college players who couldn’t or didn’t get drafted, some with (unrealistic) aspirations of advancement in the future.
“For the 2024 season, the minimum salary was $26,200 per player.”
Their home park is Bosse Field, opened in 1915. It’s the third oldest operational baseball field in the country, after Wrigley and Fenway. It was used as the home field for the Racine Belles in A League of Their Own.
Here’s Dad’s column in full. I wanna find a way to put this athletic ‘accomplishment’ on my resume.
Otters star was a hit (and took one) with youngsters Sunday, June 15, 1997
By Garret [Redacted] The Evansville Courier A3
When things are looking bad… Terry Beyna plays third base for the Evansville Otters and, well, you know how they’ve been doing. The 24-year-old native of Mount Prospect, Ill., is playing his second season for the Frontier League team and has been one of the bright spots, hitting well over .300.
Before the season, I asked Beyna to keep a week’s diary that would take in the Otters’ first five games. He chronicled the long bus ride, his roommate’s loud, and awkward, bedroom activities, and the treatment he received for his aching groin.
Beyna wrote about the team’s losing streak, which stretched to seven games after Thursday night’s defeat at home.
The diary appears in my column today and Monday.
When Beyna turned in his notebook, I mentioned that I coach a baseball team of 9 and 10-year old boys. I wondered aloud if he’d be willing to pitch batting practice to them.
Sure, he replied, noting that he often conducts kids’ hitting clinics in Mount Prospect.
This is one nice guy, I said to myself as I headed to the office to edit his copy.
Friday morning. My son Evan is the first batter. He rips a pitch that strikes Beyna above the eye. [Ed. Note: I busted his nose, not his eye.]
Blood flies everywhere. I fetch a cold compress. It’s obvious that the practice pitcher will need stitches.
“I’m really going to hear about this in the dugout,” Beyna said. “Getting hurt by a 10-year-old.”
He telephoned the team trainer.
“You aren’t going to believe what I’m going to tell you,” I heard him say.
Not wanting to spoil the kids’ fun, Beyna returns to the mound and pitches until every player has had a couple dozen swings. He offers advice on their technique and hollers praise when they do well.
The trainer arrives, examines the cut and takes Beyna to the emergency room.
I felt like hiding under home plate. Here the team is reeling and I contribute to the conking of one of its best players.
Terry, the boys really appreciated what you did. Let’s wait until scar tissue forms and lunch is on me.
—————-
—————-
I busted Beyna’s nose up, possibly cracking it. “Gushing,” Dad described it, a term he doesn’t use lightly. The trainer, an Asian (of some sort), soon-ish arrived in a sedan. He did whatever it was he did to temporarily mend the Otters’ third baseman. After which, he really did make sure to pitch to all of the kids. He just knew to use more juice when (certain) kids were up.
Leveling up to The Show, I met former-MLB pitcher Dana Eveland in 2013 when I was living and teaching in South Korea. A journeyman pitcher in America, he was then playing in the Korean Bigs for the Hanwha Eagles in Daejeon, my Korean home. I drummed for The Man-Wons, a cover band with a floating rotation by Westerners, or ‘weiguk’ (외국인), in the ex-pat scene. (‘Man won,’ 만 원, is Korean for their version of $10.)
After playing a late-night show at a local bar in Daejeon, Eveland came up to me, introduced himself and bought me a beer! He thanked me and said he was thrilled to get out and see and hear Western folk. Korean teams are only allowed to have two non-Koreans. His counterpart was there, a Dominican or similar, and didn’t say a word. Their Korean handler was minding him. Naturally, Eveland and I started talkin’ shop. He had played for the Milwaukee Brewers, a key rival to my Cubbies. He confirmed that Ryan Braun was the most egotistical, broken bat-up-his-ass piece of shit to everyone around him. (Much shards. Such bleed.) He said it with lively passion, helping confirm the rumor mills’ swirl.
I’ll leave you with Kyle. He has cystic fibrosis, and he’d have really bad days, back then. Dad purposefully chose him to do what he could to give him positive experiences. These days, Kyle’s a damn-fit marathon runner and seemingly unimpeded by CF.
However, at the end of my ninth year, I broke the nose of a professional ballplayer. (Well. He shouldn’t have sassed me with such soft-toss. He deserved it. Especially dressed like that, wearing his jersey?! 𝑬𝒗𝒂𝒏 the Otter, the team’s mascot? Puh-leeze!)
Ok! Back to Kyle, assuredly having a profoundly happy moment in his difficult childhood. Eric is standing with his hands behind his back, keeping guard. Very smart kid and a terrible baseball player. Shockingly, he was a steadfast defender in high school when we played full-contact hockey together.
I’m lookin’ down on Number 6, who had been linin’ up *waaaaay* too much coke for himself. I was keeping him in check, makin’ sure there was plenty left for me. And, uh, of course the others. Explains why Kyle is so happy! And Number 7, so despondent.
(Strikeouts cost you your place in the line-up and lines-out. Don’t suck.)
The ball boy in white, on the other hand, is oblivious to the game and the universe in general, but his socks are fantastic.
The Evansville Otters are a Frontier League baseball team. They’re professional but they’re not part of the MLB minor leagues.
At least they have an interesting name unlike some MiLB teams that use the names of their MLB team.
Locally, the minor league teams are the Lake County Captains, the Akron Rubber Ducks, and the Avon Crushers (their mascot is a grape, and there’s a couple wineries in the area). The Captains were the Picantes for a brief time to reach out to the hispanic community. The Rubber Ducks change their name on special weekends for something that ties into local history (this year, they’ve announced they’ll be the Galley Boys for a weekend).
The Captains are in the same division of the Midwest League (Single A) as my beloved Dayton Dragons! 🐲🐉 (Sadly, there is no direct connection between Dayton and dragons as far as I am aware.) Home opener is one week from tonight, and we’ll be there! 🥳⚾🧢
GT: magnolia. https://imgur.com/gallery/magnolia-bloom-FBsM6iA
Beautiful, RN! I got a better shot of Baby Groot when the sun came out (briefly) on Sunday
GT:
Based on some quick searches, they play each other as well.
Now, that link was just hurtful. 😞
GT:
Sorry, it was the first news link (the first ones were the two team websites, and after that were ticket sales sites offering games from last year).
Some teams that are farm teams have a nickname not related to their major league affiliate, often because they sometime change who they affiliate with and don’t want to change their brand.
Yeah my hometown team have been the Red Wings since 1929 despite several affiliate changes.
When I lived in Richmond, VA, the AAA team was Atlanta’s. They had a great new park, the perfect size for a baseball game, within walking distance of my house. Almost the entire walk was through pleasant residential neighborhoods. AAA ball is so much fun. The team was loaded with talent, too – some of their players went on to win the 1995 World Series with the Braves.
That’s awesome.
Seconded.
Sounds like assault and battery.
I’m sure you’ve seen this Evan, but for those who haven’t, the Battered Bastards of Baseball is well worth a watch if you’re a baseball fan.
Great movie.
(‘Man won,’ 만 원, is Korean for their version of $10.)
Same as downtown?
A handy at a ‘massage parlor’ is ₩30. (I know. I legitimately just wanted to get a massage. (Sincerely.) But at the end she offered. I asked her how much and just went along with it. I didn’t come. Such a strange transaction. Not for me. Not to say I haven’t done similar a few times.)
However, I did a quick search. HOLY FUCKING SHIT: “30 South Korean won equals 0.020 United States Dollar.” The world everywhere, all ’round, works on $20s.
We have a new local team – the Hub City Spartanburgers.
I might like their old name better. Down East Wood Ducks sounds like a team from The Natural.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hub_City_Spartanburgers
That was fun. I would have read your dad’s column back in the day. Our local paper was the Hammond Times (the actual Hammond that was used as a setting in A Christmas Story, though they call it “Homan” which is the name of a street). I used to read the paper, mostly the front page, Blackhawks scores, the comics, and a column or two like your dad’s.
Nice story Evan. I see that Eveland had a long, albeit undistinguished MLB career, pitching on 10 teams in 11 years. Unsurprisingly, he was a lefty, who often can hang on longer than their numbers suggest they should.
Maybe he wouldn’t have an aching groin if he didn’t engage in loud and awkward bedroom activities.
Where’s the fun in that? Pro ballplayer? Go to the bar and go for gold. (Or whatever you can get.)
“Come on I won the MVP in 79. I can do whatever I want to.” ~Keith Hernandez (on Seinfeld).
😧
The 5.25 inch drive I acquired is a TEAC FD-55FV-03-U. What I didn’t realize is that the -55F is not natively supported in the IBM compatable ecosystem. There are workaround for DOS but I don’t know if Linux will be able to talk to it. (CP/M machines are fine with it, but the disk format it writes is different from the drives that do run natively in IBM.)
I hope you tossed the bat and stared down the pitcher after that hit.
I honestly don’t remember. ‘Psh. Business as usual,’ and move on. What? Your nose *ain’t* gushin’?
Incredible naivete still ‘haunts’ me. The ‘psh’ aspect holds for my home run trot, which I never, ever, took in my baseball career. But don’t make it all fancy! Just trot around like it was *expected.* ‘That’s just how I roll. Get used to it.’ Flashy celebrations *every* time detracts from their significance.
“I hope you tossed the bat and stared down the pitcher after that hit.”
Goddammit, I wanna live in that reality. Queen is the soundtrack. (‘Don’t stop me now’ would be perfection.)
DOT offered another round of deferred resignations this week. My peers and counterparts in ATC are exempt.
I state this because I am aure pols and pundits will be running out about air traffic safety ZOMG!111!!
My guess, they are eeking out the last bit of those on the fence before the RIFs start rolling out (which again, we are supposedly exempt from)
Some teams that are farm teams have a nickname not related to their major league affiliate, often because they sometime change who they affiliate with and don’t want to change their brand.
If I recall correctly, The Indianapolis Indians(!) were affiliated with Cincinnati.
And now I have to wonder if they were forced into a name change.
The Indianans?
Looks as if they’re with the Pirates but still the Indians.
Sure. We can’t have Indians, even though we never even did the tomahawk chop.
/grumbles about fucking Guardians.
Yeah, and my alma mater had to change from Redskins to Redhawks. 😒
Cleveland Baseball Team would have been better.
Not the Rednecks?
“/grumbles about fucking Guardians”
Who?
The campus was WAY too preppy for that, at least when I was there. I could ask one of our new hires who’s a recent grad.
RC Dean:
These things. Which were not that well known before the team was named after them.
At least it’s something. 👍
Dammit, ev! And GT slaps down my idiocy in that moment. I’ve been to several games, but I don’t keep a pencil-paper scorecard like I do at MLB games.
UCS wins with the funny, but I love that it’s still the Indians. And yes, Cincinnati. I wanna go to the game tomorrow night but I’m worried my ‘sleep’ cycle won’t allow it, with work at 5am.
I state this because I am aure pols and pundits will be running out about air traffic safety ZOMG!111!!
Planes falling from the skies!
That one in PA was a shit ton of pencil whipping and people should go to prison for that.
Evan. Great story and thanks for sharing!
I played https://squaredle.com/?puzzle=lirpa-loof:
*43/43 words (+18 bonus words)
📖 In the top 1% by bonus words
Dang, I think I missed a deal
https://bringatrailer.com/listing/2018-porsche-panamera-4s-9/
although 10″ wider than the current car – not quite sure that’d fit in the (narrow) driveway.
“But honey, I _did_ buy a wagon”…
Gorgeous car at a great price. I fear the maintenance costs, though.
FR.
“not quite sure that’d fit in the (narrow) driveway”
Obvious solution – widen the driveway. Probably needs it anyway.
Love to, but can’t – pinch point between two buildings.
https://x.com/CollinRugg/status/1907130605646823473
lulz
“Are you going to do anything about these layoffs?”
“Absolutely. I am planning to call Elon Musk and tell him I am outraged. These are rookie numbers. He needs to get a whole lot more people fired before I’m satisfied.”
That’s the best way to deal with them. Just mock them and walk away.
[In my very best Nancy Kerrigan voice] Whyyyyyyyyy??????
Golden opportunity for Trump to show some respect for the Constitution and that this was NOT a federal matter.
Funny but I don’t think Senator Spartacus is going to say anything about this.
Let me know when NJ yoinks his permit.