Lesbian Cowgirls in High Fantasy

by | Dec 22, 2022 | Art, Entertainment, Film | 167 comments

Now that I got your attention with the title, I will let you down by informing you that this is an article about the Disney+ series Willow. In case you aren’t aware, Willow was an 80s LucasFilm property directed by Ron Howard (brother of handsome actor Clint Howard) and the Disney+ show takes place 20 years after the original film. (Even though in real time the movie was more than 30 years ago and all the returning actors look it)
I hate myself. So of course I am watching this show. I have this thing where I have to watch things I know I will hate, just to confirm I was right. And, boy was I right.

Now, I am not a critic so opaque and bland to blame a story’s failings on things like ‘WOKE’ or ‘The Message!11’. In fact, a lot of the common story elements called ‘WOKE’ today I was advocating for my young nieces to embrace in the early aughts. ‘You don’t need a prince to save you’, ‘You can like what you like, don’t worry if it’s for boys or girls’. That kind of backfired. But really, the ‘WOKE’ stuff in She-Hulk, Disney’s Star Wars, etc didn’t bother me, it’s just how shitily it was written, directed and produced.

The writing for this show is utter shit. No matter which ideology it is espousing. There are so many anachronisms in the dialogue that it becomes stilted. It’s Ayn Rand level dialogue only for the AOC crowd. This is supposed to be a High Fantasy show, and these actors are speaking as though they are on Saved By The Bell The Millennial Years. Still, that isn’t what is bothering me. Val Kilmer played Madmartigan in the original film, and he really didn’t try to do any kind of accent or anything especially ‘Fantasy’ with his performance.

No, what ultimately broke my camel-back for this show didn’t happen until episode 3. Out of nowhere one of the characters comes across a cockney cowgirl and her mute lover…or sister…or lover-sister…WTF!? Fantasy in of it’s own has a very specific visual language. This being an established property doubly so. Not only the writers, but the entire production crew said, ‘Fuck-it, cowboys and Fantasy, it’s all the same’.

Just in case my description of this wasn’t enough for you to pass judgement, Disney+ thought this scene was so great that they released part of it as a clip. You can watch it here.

Fuck You! Cut Spending Hire me, I can write this shitty way cheaper!

About The Author

CPRM

CPRM

Organic troll farmer.

167 Comments

  1. Not Adahn

    Now that I got your attention with the title,

    Why yes. Yes you did.

      • westernsloper

        Lesbian Nazi Hookers is my favorite search term on PornHub.

      • robodruid

        Huh, I checked, because I am that type of guy.
        They don’t have any results on that field.

  2. Not Adahn

    the ‘WOKE’ stuff in She-Hulk, Disney’s Star Wars, etc didn’t bother me,

    I can’t unsee the edict “no female character has anything to learn from a male one.” It’s as bad as the blue/orange color thing.

    • Nephilium

      But I’ve been told that Ms. Marvel was the bestest MCU show to come out this year. Ignore the bad writing, the shoe-horned characters, the breaking of comic cannon, and the teenage girl getting elected to a Mosque’s governing body. The only reason to hate it is because you hate women, brown people, and Muslims.

      • UnCivilServant

        What sort of fantasy denomination of islam does she follow?

      • Nephilium

        Never named, but I know more about Kamala Khan’s religion then any other MCU character (with the exception of Netflix Daredevil, who is a different Daredevil then the one that appeared in She-Hulk).

      • Ted S.

        Doesn’t everybody?

  3. Not Adahn

    Cowboys can be mixed with any genre. See also: Firefly, Trigun and Xxxenophile vol 6.

  4. UnCivilServant

    The main issue with the shorthand of complaining about the wokeness of a work is the comorbidity with bad writing and often bad performances. Because the criteria in selecting people for the roles does not appear to be competence, you are almost guaranteed to get garbage out. Compounded by the holy diktats that you must not malign ‘the oppressed’, you lose the humanizing flaws and foibles, making them cardboard before you even get started. You’re taking tools out of the writer’s toolbox, and it would take a skilled writer indeed to work with what’s left, as as mentioned, they do not tend to hire skilled writers. With limited tools and lockstep worldviews, the inputs to the production team are fairly cookie cutter at best. Thus it becomes easy to place one label on the product, whatever the packaging, it all has the same basic flaws that undermine it.

  5. Drake

    “Woke” is one of those things hard to define but you know when you see it.
    In the original Star Wars movies, Leia was tough and held her own in every situation – but those movies weren’t woke.
    https://youtu.be/p1BlfldOnjI

    In the new woke movies she was aloof, arrogant, and condescending because girl power.

    The Amazon Wheel of Time series immediately took me out of the story with casting. Somehow an ancient isolated village had a population that looked like a UN meeting (and they couldn’t really act).

    • Q Continuum

      The difference is the way in which character’s actions are incorporated into the overall story. There have been books and movies with strong, capable female characters for over a century; however they’re not woke because they don’t make that the fulcrum of the entire piece and beat you over the head with it. In Episodes IV – VI, Leia was a badass and just did what she had to do without special fanfare. To be simpatico with THE MESSAGE, strong, capable female characters can’t just do badass stuff, the story must constantly and blatantly draw the viewers’ attention to just how badass this particular female is and look how incredible she is and she smashes the patriarchy and all the men surrounding her are either evil patriarchy-upholders or useless incompetents and wow they’re so lucky she’s around to sort everything out and did we mention that she has a vagina and having a vagina doesn’t make you a female and she’s a badass capable vagina-owning female who smashes the patriarchy!!!11!!11!

      • Not Adahn

        For diversity done (generally) right, watch The Expanse.

        I say generally, because I just didn’t buy the last season panpolycule Drummer was a part of.

      • Timeloose

        Agreed.

        If you ever saw what the CCP forced the movie studios to put in to any film meant for release in China, it feels the same way. We won’t allow you to put this film in the theaters in China unless the CCP is seen in a good light.

        See Transformers, Looper, etc.

      • Timeloose

        See the Variety Article: https://variety.com/2014/film/columns/transformers-age-of-extinction-patriotic-for-china-1201257030/

        “Age of Extinction,” though, satire ends at the water’s edge. As soon as the action shifts to Hong Kong, the outbreak of alien-engendered chaos is met by a sea captain ordering a call to “the central government” for help, and later China’s defense minister does a walk-and-talk, sternly and seriously vowing to defend Hong Kong. America’s government is portrayed either ridiculous or diabolical, but China’s is assured and effective.

      • kinnath

        See also: Arcane.

    • Timeloose

      In films it seems “Woke” is almost meta, in that it needs to be obvious that some aspect of the story or character’s abilities was put in the story by the creator only for this purpose.

      “Not Woke” There were no special mentions or quips in the Aliens franchise that women could be as badass as men, just several badass tough women who had reasonable strength, bravery, and abilities (Ripley and the space Marine “Velasquez I think ?” who got played John Connor’s foster mom and got impaled by the T-1000 in T-2). The character could have been played by either sex and it would have been believable.

      “Woke” The Girl Power scene in the Avengers where several of the female superheroes formed a skirmish line to save the Men who were getting their asses kicked. It was obviously put in the script for this purpose and didn’t move forward the plot or character development.

    • Tundra

      Firefly was full of cool chicks, but it never felt woke to me.

      Mmmmm…Zoe.

      • PutridMeat

        Kaylee > Zoe > > Inara

      • Not Adahn

        Ye–nah.

        Inara knew things.

      • PutridMeat

        I suppose for those less experienced, you might need a teacher. Imma in da teaching bidness.

        Plus what UCS said.

      • Tundra

        You forgot a couple.

        Zoe>Inara>Kaylee>Saffron>River

      • UnCivilServant

        I question your taste.

      • PutridMeat

        I used to think he was cool.

        Though I agree with River last. I could even go with Zoe ~ Kaylee, but to put Inara above Kaylee? Blasphemer.

      • Tundra

        You have no idea how happy that makes me!

      • UnCivilServant

        I can only conclude that it has no impact on your happiness.

      • Endless Mike

        Saffron>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Kaylee>Inara>Zoe>River

      • Fatty Bolger

        Pure. Insanity.

  6. Sean

    You can watch it here.

    Ick.

    • CPRM

      Many thanks for the Christmas gift! 👍🔥🌶

      • Sean

        You’re welcome. I hope you enjoy it. 🙂

    • PutridMeat

      “several seams were harmed during the making of this gallery” – heh.

  7. Rebel Scum

    This cunte defense attorney in the Kari Lake election trial is trying to pretend that standard polling practices and sample sizes are not standard polling practices and sample sizes.

      • Penguin

        Katie Hobbs & crew, I’d imagine.

  8. Fourscore

    If it ain’t got no cowboys, Indians (feather), wagon trains and cavalry it ain’t no movie I want to watch.

    Good on you, CPRM, for taking the hit, not that I would go to a movie anyway. I’d miss half of it by the frequent bathroom trips anyway.

    Admittedly, the title was intriguing

  9. juris imprudent

    It’s not so surprising that story-telling has become so woeful with all of the elements of classic story-telling drained out.

    • Zwak, who has his own double cross to bear.

      That is the thing. They have completely ignored the rules of good fiction and think that it will turn out… OK.

      Seriously, Chekhov’s Gun. Learn it!

  10. kinnath

    Since no one else has yet: The Drinker Says

    • PieInTheSky

      damn it

    • Not Adahn

      Haven’t seen a dig at Kevin Smith like that before.

  11. PieInTheSky

    Now, I am not a critic so opaque and bland to blame a story’s failings on things like ‘WOKE’ or ‘The Message!11’.

    shots fired at The Critical Drinker

    • Trigger Hippie

      It’s a fair criticism. After several people here recommended his videos I gave them a go and while at first I found them entertaining and informative as to WHY these movies and streaming series suck so badly it wore thin quickly. Seems like the vast majority of his content is basically him saying Disney +, Marvel studios, and Amazon financed entertainment are garbage over and over and over again. Sometimes he’ll bring on guests who all sit around and agree. Basically he’s been making the same video for at least a year straight now and I just don’t care anymore.

      • kinnath

        Watch some of the his reviews on shows that he liked — Expanse, Arcane, and others.

        Watch the series on Why Modern Movies Suck.

        The latest review on Avatar 2 acknowledges the movie is visually stunning while the story and dialog are utter shit.

      • Trigger Hippie

        I’ve watched a few of those in the past. I’m not saying all he does is bitch about those studios but it seems to dominate his content.

      • kinnath

        The movies and tv shows of the last couple of years have become so consistently bad, that yes, his reviews have become repetitive. And he is clearly a fan of certain games, movies, and shows and he is pissed about the organized destruction of those properties.

      • Nephilium

        I’ll stand up for the Orville. First season starts a bit slow (and much more of a ST:TNG parody then it develops into), but it is a solid show with some really decent character building over the course of three seasons.

        Russian Doll was an interesting time loop series, and Love, Death, Robots had a couple of entertaining episodes.

        I’ve still been enjoying Titans (another slow first season) and Doom Patrol (this one… it’s just strange as hell), and Harley Quinn is an entertaining adult animation show.

      • kinnath

        I watch Drinker, because I learn about shows that I would never watch on my own. I watched Squid Games and Arcane because of the very positive reviews from Drinker.

        I basically rely on the Glibs and the Drinker to point me to something new to watch. Otherwise, I leave the TV off. I have completely given up on movies.

      • R C Dean

        I liked L D & R, mostly. The good news is, the shorts that aren’t up to snuff are, well. short.

        Two thumbs up for Arcane.

        I’ll have to look at Harley Quinn; I’m kind of in a show hole. I just can’t quite seem to get traction on Game of Thrones, which I had hopes for.

      • Nephilium

        R C Dean:

        Almost forgot, if you like superhero stuff, definitely give Peacemaker a try.

      • kinnath

        Peacemaker was awesome.

      • Zwak, who has his own double cross to bear.

        Russian Doll was one of the last two TV shows I enjoyed, the other being a BBC version of Shakespeare’s The Hollow Crown.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Sorry, but if I want to be lectured by a sanctimonious asshat I’ll… well, I don’t want to be, which is why I don’t watch Orville.

      • Pat

        I’ve never seen any of his videos, but it seems to me from that description that they’re bound to end up being repetitive in direct proportion to how repetitive the material he’s reviewing has gotten. When Hollywood keeps making the same dozen flicks over and over again the reviews are necessarily going to be pretty much the same dozen reviews over and over again.

      • juris imprudent

        ding-ding-ding

      • Trigger Hippie

        Agreed. Which is why I believe he should focus his attention on other projects. But then again, I’m not holding my breath. He knows where his bread is buttered and it with the hatred of his followers for those particular studios. As long as they continue to make big money he’ll monetize his criticism of them. Which is fine for him or people who care about those projects but I’ve never been more than a casual fan of any of them prior to the new content. So my dismay at their bastardized versions only upset me so much.

        It’s like listen to a sports talk jock from NY going into every detail about why the Knicks are terrible and I’m sitting over here not caring at all about the NBA.

      • kinnath

        His “Drinker Fixes” videos are pretty interesting. He takes a crappy movie or show and explains how it could have been changed to improve the characters and story line without abandoning the entire story concept.

      • juris imprudent

        He crowd-sourced the finances for some production he wants to do, and shot over his goal in a stupidly short amount of time. We’ll see how he does as a producer instead of critic.

      • kinnath

        I chucked in some money and am following along with the news that come through Kickstarter.

        I also bought his first book. I’m not too far into it yet. It’s nothing special, but it is far from bad. It moves along pretty briskly.

        I think they asked for 25K or 50K and got about 10 times the target on Kickstarter.

  12. PieInTheSky

    OT

    Ancient-Warfare Historian Rates 10 More Battle Scenes In Movies And TV | How Real Is It?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ng24ML6Xbs

    ditch guy is back. Also that last name is ridiculous

  13. Homple

    There is much to be said for limiting preaching to the sermons at church services.

    • Pat

      Preachy doesn’t always mean bad. Antiwar films like Platoon, Apocalypse Now, Paths of Glory, and All Quiet on the Western Front are preachy. Schindler’s List is preachy. So are Well Street and The Big Short. They’re still well produced, well acted, and tell a compelling story.

    • Zwak, who has his own double cross to bear.

      What if it is just a thought, and not a sermon?

  14. Pat

    But really, the ‘WOKE’ stuff in She-Hulk, Disney’s Star Wars, etc didn’t bother me, it’s just how shitily it was written, directed and produced.

    There was a time when I would have attempted to be high minded and not judge a story on its politics, but I’m so thoroughly fucking tired of the hamfisted pseudo-intellectual, pseudo-Marxist didacticism that that alone would be plenty to put me off nowadays.

    I grew up in the church, so I got exposed to all of the shitty Christian entertainment, although my parents weren’t fundies and outside of the chapel we also consumed secular entertainment. By the time I was in my mid teens I realized that the problem with the Christian entertainment from church wasn’t just the shitty production values caused by low budgets (there is plenty of low-budget secular entertainment with equally shitty production values that shines on the strength of its content, for example, or those flicks like The Room where the horrible production becomes entertaining in and of itself), but that starting from an ideology and then working backwards to a story makes for abjectly terrible storytelling. It’s why Soviet art was so terrible. The vast majority of studios putting out content now, including the indie studios, are no different, and consequently no better, than TBN.

    • Tundra

      I thought The Passion of the Christ was pretty cool.

      • Pat

        Even as a Christian I didn’t care for it. As necessary as the brutality arguably is, it quickly just descends into relentless torture porn, to which you get desensitized after about the first 15 minutes, and there was too little expository on the motivation of the character. The story of the crucifixion entails a lot more than “look how fucking barbaric Roman execution methods were.” In that sense, even an arguably blasphemous flick like The Last Temptation of Christ does a better job of exploring the character – ultimately, he chooses his sacrificial death in asceticism over worldly happiness, love, and sexuality.

      • Tundra

        Best Christian movies, in your opinion?

      • Pine_Tree

        maybe Chariots of Fire?

      • Trigger Hippie

        Does The Book of Eli count?

      • Pat

        I haven’t watched it in probably 20 years, but I remember liking Quo Vadis. Ben-Hur would probably be up there for most people, but I found it a bit tedious. King of Kings is rated well, although I don’t recall ever having seen it. The Hiding Place was good. Chariots of Fire maybe, although I don’t know that it would necessarily qualify as a “Christian movie.” Jesus of Nazareth is technically a mini series, not a movie, but that’s probably my favorite Christian production.

      • Tundra

        Thanks. I did see the Jesus of Nazareth series and thought it was terrific.

      • Pat

        Great casting, direction and cinematography, and a good, ecumenical consensus depiction of Christ’s life and death.

        Fun fact: they used some of the abandoned sets from the production (in Tunisia, IIRC) for Life of Brian.

      • juris imprudent

        Life of Brian, no question.

      • Animal

        ^ This.

      • juris imprudent

        For me, part of that was the theater experience, where my buddy fell asleep for a moment just before the alien spaceship scene started – and he woke up in the middle of that. He was so befuddled and his girlfriend and I were just dying.

      • Pat

        Being an abysmally shitty Christian whose salvation may not even remain intact, I can say that Life of Brian was hilarious, but it’s unquestionably blasphemous and about as far as you could possibly get from a “Christian movie.”

      • Mojeaux

        Dogma.

      • Zwak, who has his own double cross to bear.

        Jesus Christ, Superstar.

        And I am not joking, but I am also not a Christian.

      • Mojeaux

        Oooh, I have an opinion on this!

        My grandmother, for one reason or another, or if she really believed this or if she used it to make me behave or if she really did not understand [[[our]]] doctrine, basically told me that every time I sin, it makes Jesus hurt, almost like he dies on the cross all over again. Every time. So I grew up believing that I (each of us) was responsible for the torture and murder of an innocent man. It led to a severe crisis of faith for several years (which you can see in one of my books).

        So! I sobbed all the way through that movie, and I almost didn’t make it, but at the time, I felt obliged, since Jesus died for my sins, and to NOT watch was to minimize what he went through.

      • Mojeaux

        That may have been a little bit more revealing than I wanted it to be. :/

      • Trigger Hippie

        It’s okay. My father once claimed I was possessed by “demons of rebellion” for refusing to eat my dinner of Shepard’s Pie. It didn’t quite lead to an attempted exorcism but for a few moments there I was beginning to wonder if the old man was up for it.

      • Pat

        Free grace theologians often go too soft on law-keeping, but that’s just as wrong in the opposite direction. Admittedly I don’t know enough about the Mormon theological innovations to mainline Christianity to have an informed opinion, but I’d say it’s a biblically untenable teaching.

      • Mojeaux

        Mainstream Christianity doesn’t like us because 1) we are not trinitarians and 2) we give off the stink of having to work our way to salvation and 3) lots of other reasons that are unimportant.

        I won’t go into the deep theology

        [Disclaimer: This is Mormon theology, not a judgment on mainstream Christianity. Please assume everything I say here is prefaced with “This is what I believe.”]

        but our base premise is this: We’re born saved. Salvation is not in question. What IS in question is EXHALTATION, which is basically where you are eligible to train to become a god. You work your way to exhaltation and that opportunity. We don’t believe in a place of eternal torment, just gradations of paradise.

        The nuances between the two are the most important thing, but because the average True Believing Mormon doesn’t grok the nuances (or are never taught), then they actually do believe you should try to work your way into heaven. It doesn’t work that way, which is why I say I don’t know if my g’ma really didn’t understand or she was using it as a cudgel or both.

        A youngish guy got up in church one time and talked about what we have to do to get into heaven and stay out of hell, and I was LIVID. Nobody corrected him. The bishop didn’t get up and tap him on the shoulder and whisper in his ear. To my shame, I also did not get up in the middle of the service and say, “Yo, no, that’s false doctrine.” I regret that to this day, because I’m a known troublemaker and it’s something on brand for me, but I just…didn’t.

        In the midst of my crisis of faith, I had a bishop who asked me into his office just to ask me how I was doing, and I broke down and said, “This whole Jesus-dying-on-the-cross thing has got to be a setup.” He agreed, to my surprise. We chatted. He said something offhand that just made it all so crystal clear and then my crisis was over, pretty much just like that.

      • Pat

        2) we give off the stink of having to work our way to salvation

        So do most Christians, besides the free gracers. Perhaps with good reason, I guess, since every New Testament writer besides Paul taught perhaps not a works-based salvation, but certainly a works-required salvation. That’s why Luther called the epistle of James an “epistle of straw” and suggested it didn’t belong in the canon. He could just as well have taken at aim at the epistles of Peter and Hebrews, while he was at it – they say the exact same thing.

        I knew about the non-trinitarianism and exaltation stuff, but not the born saved thing. I can see why that would be a sticking point with mainline Christianity. It pretty much obviates Christ.

      • Pine_Tree

        Just to toss a little grenade in here…

        I never saw it. It’s one great big Second Commandment violation.

      • R C Dean

        Is the Second Commandment “Thou shalt go armed”?

      • Pine_Tree

        Graven images. Exodus 20:4-etc.. No depictions of God, including Christ when he was in the flesh.

        See Luke 22:36, though.

      • juris imprudent

        It’s good to have such a Calvinist in our midst.

      • Mojeaux

        @nw says he’s a Calvinist, so we have a couple here and there.

      • juris imprudent

        Hmm, are we over quota? Are they at least different factions within Calvin’s doctrine?

      • R C Dean

        Sometimes the joke falls flat. Ah, well. There’s more snark where that come from.

      • Pine_Tree

        Well, I was in a rush. Whole plan was to toss a bomb and walk away, so snark is fine of course.

      • Pine_Tree

        OK, I just got it.

      • R C Dean

        Shoulda been “Thou shalt bear arms”.

      • Pat

        See Luke 22:36, though.

        While I’ve used that verse myself in the past to justify (rationalize?) arms-keeping and self-defense, verses 37-38 pretty well undermine that position:

        36 He said to them, “But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one. 37 It is written: ‘And he was numbered with the transgressors’; and I tell you that this must be fulfilled in me. Yes, what is written about me is reaching its fulfillment.”

        38 The disciples said, “See, Lord, here are two swords.”

        “That’s enough!” he replied.

        His disciples needed to be armed to fulfill prophecy, and two swords among a dozen men was sufficient to the task. Later in verses 47-51 when one of the disciples actually uses one of those swords in defense of Christ against the arresting party, he gets admonished and Christ heals the man he wounded.

      • Pine_Tree

        Well if I had time and inclination today, I might engage on the case you make in the first part of your comment, since “undermine(d)” is a long way from the only way to comprehend all that.

        But to run off of RC’s first remark, I’d say that your last phrase (Peter’s sword) is at the very least a descriptive (though not prescriptive) example of the normality of going armed. And that whole series of events is wildly misunderstood as well, but like I said, not today.

      • Pat

        I feel ya. I’m not a pacifist, nor am I opposed to self-defense and arms-keeping. But as much as I wish there was, I don’t think there’s any possible way to support self-defense and arms-keeping from anything contained in the teachings of Christ or his apostles without tying scripture into knots.

      • Pat

        The church itself pretty much nullified that one. They’ve been depicting Christ in art ever since they were able to worship publicly. I’ve seen it argued that images of Christ do not violate the 2nd commandment because God presented himself to humanity in the person of Christ.

      • Tundra

        I believe that’s been the Orthodox position for a couple thousand years.

        People sure do get wrapped around the axles of the wrong shit.

    • Endless Mike

      Check out The Chosen

      • Pat

        I finally got around to watching that (I was discussing it with, IIRC, hayeksplosives a couple months ago) after having given up previously after the first two episodes, which I found a bit tedious. It definitely picked up later. I wasn’t blown away by it, but it’s leagues ahead of the crap we got in church when I was a youth. The 2nd season leaned a bit too much into ahistorical “all the good guys are either women or hated minorities” shtick, I thought. I think there’s a new season supposed to be coming out next year.

      • Ted S.

        Robbie Benson, wooden as always.

        Rod Steiger gets to chew the scenery, but he does it well.

  15. juris imprudent

    So the Bee got me thinking about how amusing it would be to superimpose the Gadsden snake on Ukraine’s flag – just to watch heads explode.

    • Hyperion

      Yeah, the peace loving libs would go insane if you insult their favorite war mongers and Hunter’s crack dealer.

    • Pat

      Dressing him up like Castro was a nice touch.

      • Hyperion

        I thought that was his regular Nazi attire.

  16. Hyperion

    Where’s the animated version?

  17. Timeloose

    The costumes in general look like they were relatively contemporary. Snaps, buttons, and fine thread fabrics for peasants? Why not Velcro and silk shirts while you are at it.

    I’m trying to remember a TV show where there was a wizard in medieval times, but he was in realty some kind of 20th century inventor that got sent back in time….I could be just creating a TV show collage due to my advanced age and frequent use of noxious liquors.

    • Nephilium

      The trope has been used in a couple of books and movies.

      • Timeloose

        Hell it might be a Gary Coleman reference from Buck Rodgers. Who knows at this point.

      • Raven Nation

        Two that immediately come to mind are Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court and Crichton’s Timeline.

        A kind of reverse version is used in Asimov’s Pebble in the Sky.

      • Timeloose

        Well I read all three, so that makes sense.

      • Not Adahn

        Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court

        That’s where a guy goes back in time to demand increased taxes and the banning of longbows?

    • one true athena

      There was also a book series in the 80s about a modern engineer sent back to medieval Poland and he starts immediately trying to technologically transform them, but I can’t remember who wrote them . I do remember they were entertaining, and my dad thought it was a fairly realistic version of how difficult it would actually be.

      • R C Dean

        Yeah, you have to make the tools, to make the tools, to make the thing.

      • kinnath

        This is the future for humanity I fear.

      • Raven Nation

        Cross-Time Engineer?

      • one true athena

        *looks* ah yes, FRANKOWSKI.
        I remembered the Poland part but not his name. lol

      • DEG

        I have them somewhere. They were pretty good.

  18. Tundra

    Newsflash!

    Shapiro is a fuckwit!

    Neocons need to go away. Maybe volunteer in Ukraine.

    • kinnath

      Ukraine is an authoritarian shithole. It may be a wee bit less authoritarian that Russia, but who cares.

      They’ve been swapping control of that dirt for a thousand years.

      Not our circus. Not our monkeys.

      • Drake

        Wee bit less a year ago. Now it’s a straight up dictatorship.

      • rhywun

        They’ve been swapping control of that dirt for a thousand years.

        Don’t let that stop us from sticking our dick in it.

      • juris imprudent

        Yeah, I just crawled up out of a rabbit hole in sussing out what’s gone on there the last dozen years – holy shit. Even when not authoritarian, it’s so fucking dysfunctional that you can understand why authoritarianism is appealing. Hey, you ethnic minorities (Russian of course, but also Romanian and Hungarian) – fuck your languages, we’re only officially Ukrainian*! The 2010 election showed the cleavage politically. As far as Crimea, if was only “Ukrainian” under the USSR and from 1954 at that. Prior to that it was Russian since the late 18th century and Ottoman prior to that for 4 centuries. We’re going to fight WWIII over that?

        * obviously the left Z-suckers in this country are pretty unaware of the unappealing nationalist aspects of Ukraine. Z’s predecessor had the campaign slogan of military, language, faith.

      • R C Dean

        As far as Crimea, if was only “Ukrainian” under the USSR and from 1954 at that

        They did vote to stay in Ukraine when the Soviet Empite broked up. No idea how clean that vote was, of course.

      • juris imprudent

        They were solidly in the Yanukovich camp in 2010.

      • Drake

        I don’t have a big problem with them forming that sort of ethnostate – but that means redrawing the borders in way that only encompasses ethnic Ukrainians. If you doing that, let Hungarians rejoin Hungary, the Poles – Poland, etc.

        Might be what happens there eventually anyhow.

      • juris imprudent

        That would be going back to the Hetmanate, mid 17th century for around 100 years (until re-divided into Austro-Hungarian and Czarist control).

      • Pat

        I’ve never really understood expansionist ethnostates, but just about every ethnostate is expansionist. “We are proud to be [ethnicity]!” “We’re not [ethnicity], we’d like to leave this polity.” “Fuck you! You will be [ethnicity]!”

      • Q Continuum

        It always comes back to the simplest and most accurate explanation: humans are trash.

      • R C Dean

        They are expansionist because there are always a few of their “countrymen” just on the other side of the border.

        Which is just the rationalization for what Q said.

      • Drake

        Before the west went woke, most European countries were ethnostates – Denmark, Norway, Sweden… they generally got along. Israel is explicitly an ethnostate as are many Asian countries.

    • Rebel Scum

      defeating Russia’s invasion is in the interest of our country.

      Show your work.

    • juris imprudent

      Huh? He spends a great deal of time pointing out that our interests are not aligned with Ukraine’s interests. Which seems to me the opposite of the neo-con warmongering contingent.

      • R C Dean

        I think what he’s doing is saying that we have different reasons for fighting Russia than the Ukrainians do. And that we should keep doing at a high level so until Putin agrees to peace.

        But its still boils down to “Give Ukraine more American money and guns”:

        This means that the United States must (1) give Ukraine aid to push the Russians hard and prevent the internal collapse of the country

        His exit strategy is to stab the Ukrainians in the back when Putin makes an offer we like. I’ll admit, if the Ukes aren’t making contingency plans for the US to stab in the back, they’re fools.

      • juris imprudent

        Yeah, isn’t our exit plan always stab an ally in the back?

      • juris imprudent

        Let me amend that, when not stabbing, we leave our client dangling in the wind.

      • Pat

        I’ll be curious to see if those agitating for US involvement in Ukraine have the same resolve when China finally does a Hong Kong in Taiwan. I’m not sure if even the Bush-era neocons will be up for that one.

      • Tundra

        He still wants us in the fight.

        I hope his dick falls off.

      • juris imprudent

        If only we treated our current allies like we treated the Brits in the run-up to WWII.

  19. Mojeaux

    I didn’t make it past the first episode. I refuse to sully my adolescence this way, and I am trying hard to forget what I did watch.

  20. DEG

    It’s Ayn Rand level dialogue only for the AOC crowd.

    Yuck.

  21. DEG

    Just in case my description of this wasn’t enough for you to pass judgement, Disney+ thought this scene was so great that they released part of it as a clip. You can watch it here.

    Yeah, that was bad.

  22. Rebel Scum

    You got a loicense fuh dat prayer, mate?

    Authorities have arrested a pro-life woman for silently praying outside an abortion clinic in the United Kingdom. …

    Footage published by Alliance Defending Freedom shows police confronting Spruce, who has been charged with breaking a Public Space Protection Order for praying silently near an abortion clinic on four different occasions in Kings Norton, Birmingham.

    The woman stands silently praying as the police approach her and ask what she is doing, after which she tells them that she “might” be praying in her head.

    “Are you praying?” He asks her.

    “I might be praying in my head,” she responds.

    • juris imprudent

      It isn’t the praying that’s the problem there, it is the Public Space Protection Order. People wonder why our Founders wrote the fucking Bill of Rights in the first place?

      • Q Continuum

        Hey everyone get a load of this! This guy thinks the Bill of Rights still matters! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

        /sarc

    • Q Continuum

      #lifeinAirstripOne

    • Sean

      Yay. Now with more gun control.

      Fuckers.

      • Tundra

        I posted the rundown from GOA yesterday. It ain’t good.

  23. Mojeaux

    Um … I’mma have to think about this somewhat.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Don’t show her any letters between male friends in the 19th century.

    • rhywun

      When men behave like women, it is a form of homosexuality

      Save your time and stop there, and then wish you had the previous two minutes back.

    • Fatty Bolger

      What’s a trad/trad dad?

      • Pat

        “Traditional”

        It basically means the way everyone conducted themselves up until the early ’70s feminist movement. “Tradwives”, for example, are women who marry young and stay at home to raise children instead of entering a career or being a club slut or e-thot.

  24. Certified Public Asshat

    The Twitter left have been tripping over themselves all day trying to dunk on this tweet:

    You asked for $25 minimum wage You get: First fully automated McDonalds in Texas pic.twitter.com/hd5AsBTOwX— ELIJAH (@ElijahSchaffer) December 22, 2022

    You see, Texas is $7.25. This means full automation would never take off if the minimum was higher.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      I don’t think they fully explored the number of different nuances in the first plot. I’m sure they have another 100 or so to go with just the one.