Saturday evening, HEY! IT’S A BALLOON! links

by | Feb 4, 2023 | Daily Links | 131 comments

Lookin’ for that sweet, Montana honey.

Okay, enough of that malarkey. A fucking balloon has completely freaked out the entire country. A balloon.

 

There will be no balloon links.

 

Yep. A place that’s known for being bitterly cold in the winter is bitterly cold.

 

Ya think?

 

Screaming Lemon sounds like a great band name.

 

Who could have possibly anticipated this?

 

There’s some serious joke material in here.

 

Stay weird, Austin.

 

Peace out, Glibbies.

About The Author

Spudalicious

Spudalicious

Survey says Iโ€™m a Paleolibertarian bitches. That means I eat โ€œLโ€ibertarians for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Soave tastes a little fruity. Wait a minute, that doesnโ€™t sound quite rightโ€ฆ

131 Comments

  1. Grumbletarian

    Texans having to deal with a little cold is an endless source of entertainment.

    • Spudalicious

      Sloopy is a whiny bitch.

      • juris imprudent

        Didn’t he spend 4 years in Columbus OH?

      • Ted S.

        What do you think made him a whiny bitch?

      • Michael Malaise

        Ouch. That’s where I live.

      • MikeS

        His definition of “bitterly cold” differs pretty drastically from mine.

      • Chafed

        Flaunting your NoDak privilege again?

      • MikeS

        Privilege isn’t exactly the word I’d use, but there was a 60 degree difference between our locales that day.

      • slumbrew

        TBF, thereโ€™s also a lot to be said about being prepared and used to things.

        My brother moved to NC a while back; they shut down when they got a couple inches of snow, not because theyโ€™re effete girly-men but because Wake county literally owned one snow plow.

      • MikeS

        I didn’t criticize the lack of snow/ice equipment at all. I get that. All I’m saying is that 38 above zero is not “bitterly cold”.

      • slumbrew

        Well, youโ€™re not wrong there. I mistakenly thought you were referring to the ice issues they had.

        Iโ€™m not gonna bother with a hat until it drops below 20.

      • Chafed

        #BostonStrong

    • Nephilium

      At a place I used to work at, they had an office in Cleveland, OH, as well as an office in Cleveland, GA. One winter, the GA location closed “due to inclement weather” and sent out pictures to everyone in the company so we could all be appalled at what they were dealing with. It was a light dusting of snow, the OH office replied back with the 6-8 foot snow piles that were in our parking lot that year, and I believe some of the other rural northern offices also replied back.

      It took them a while to live that down.

    • Urthona

      It’s not funny dammit.

      • Ted S.

        It’s funny when it happens to other people.

    • Not Adahn

      Losing power to an all-electric house in Austin during an ice storm was when I realized an all-electric house was a really stupid idea.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      *eyeroll*

      Our leaders really are embarrassing.

      • Brochettaward

        As I said last night – Joe is the old fool who would have left OBL hidden away in Pakistan rather than take the risk to call for a raid.

        But he’s the same clown who has gotten us closer to a hot war with Russia in our entire history.

      • Rebel Scum

        “F-22 Raptors from Langley Air Force base on Saturday. ”

        We had to send more than one of these for a balloon…I think a single F-16 would have sufficed.

      • EvilSheldon

        It’s longstanding doctrine that military aircraft always deploy in flights of two (at a minimum, I guess.)

      • MikeS

        Huh. Just like cops.

    • rhywun

      (Jill went on to say that she and Joe pray for the military every day at dinner.)

      lolffs

  2. KK the Porcine Pearl-Eater

    We’ll always have Chinese Spy Balloon…

  3. Rebel Scum

    “Screaming Lemon”

    This incident seems to have soured his reputation.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      He has a rather acidic attitude

      • Bobarian LMD

        He seems to be losing his ap-peel

    • anti pro state

      Surely, you zest.

    • juris imprudent

      Pucker up buttercup.

    • Grumbletarian

      The fact that he’s a shit might be a bitter pill for CNN to swallow.

    • The Hyperbole

      I gather you people think all these lemon puns are rather pithy.

    • mock-star

      That really rinds my gears.

      • dbleagle

        But he must be a start because there is already has a candy named for him- Lemmon Heads.

      • Michael Malaise

        How dare you besmirch the good name of a great theater candy by associating it with that … person.

    • Swiss Servator

      Enough!

      *narrows gaze*

  4. Rebel Scum

    “Thereโ€™s some serious joke material in here.”

    Nothing comes to mind.

    • Spudalicious

      That was a very thoughtful response.

  5. Tundra

    Hey Spud!

    Did the warm weather make it there, yet?

    My buddy’s Garmin watch alerted (and freaked out) his wife during a mountain bike race. I decided to not set mine up and take my chances.

    • Spudalicious

      48 today, 17 three days ago.

      • Tundra

        There it is. Still sitting on my front steps watching the sun go down and enjoying 53.

      • westernsloper

        Lame

    • Ted S.

      In other words, it will never be done away with.

      • Brochettaward

        I assure everyone that the child First growing in my man-womb as is real as can be.

  6. Nephilium

    Saturday is upon us and I’m at home waiting for the weather to warm up. So, here’s the Zoom/Happy Hour/Discussion room that’ll be kicked off at 2000 Eastern.

  7. Brochettaward

    1. The Chinese doctor did no time. He was likely supported by the CCP who hardly give a fuck about bioethics.
    2. He wouldn’t be back in business doing research if they really had a problem with what he did.

    • Chafed

      No shit. He would be an organ donor.

      • Tundra

        Excellent ear worm material.

        Thanks!

      • rhywun

        Excellent ear worm material.

        +1

      • westernsloper

        Wrong…..I preferred Nena. Damnit!

  8. Muzzled Woodchipper

    The boy is at an exciting time tonight. Just about to turn 16, out on a date with a girl that makes me wish I were 16 again, and SCARED TO DEATH. Mrs. Muzzled said his hands were shaking on the way to pick her up.

    • Spudalicious

      Knock the back out of it, kid!

      • Chafed

        Ouch!

    • Tundra

      So good. It’s gonna be so much fun for you over the coming years to give him shit about today!

    • Urthona

      That happened to me too at that age. Also might now if I had dated in the past 20 years.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    โ€œDonโ€™s a bossy guy and difficult to work with โ€” even he would admit that. He was a solo act before. He doesnโ€™t want to be in Destinyโ€™s Child,โ€ the source added, referring to the music group headlined by Beyoncรฉ in the early aughts.

    Others close to Lemon confirmed the former primetime anchor is โ€œnot happyโ€ about sharing the limelight with Harlow and Collins.

    โ€œDon has an intractable ego,โ€ a source close to both Licht and Lemon said. โ€œMy understanding is he wants the show to be about him. I donโ€™t know how you fix that. Itโ€™s a very difficult situation.โ€

    How do you fix that? It’s easy. Let the prima donna start his own network.

    • Brochettaward

      If he wasn’t gay and black, he’d be fired. That simple. No one gives a fuck about Don Lemon in the real world.

    • rhywun

      Don has an intractable ego

      Nobody saw this coming.

      • Chafed

        Prepare my fainting couch.

    • Ted S.

      And some people wonder why there’s a shortage of rental housing.

    • rhywun

      An ex-housemate who turned into a bum left the city but called up later wanting my spare bedroom. I told him no and never heard from him again. I knew I would never get rid of him.

    • Chafed

      That is a crazy story. Maybe the mafia can go do a mitzvah.

    • Spudalicious

      Wow. That was damned impressive.

    • EvilSheldon

      There is just something about a dude who really knows how to use an axe…

    • Q Continuum

      I’m not gay but…

      • Chafed

        I wasn’t but now I’m wondering.

      • Sean

        $20 is $20.

  10. The Bearded Hobbit

    Who the hell is “Erik”?

    • The Bearded Hobbit

      “Eric”

      • Tundra
      • rhywun

        There it is.

    • Chafed

      Swalwell

  11. westernsloper

    I love Nina

  12. westernsloper

    Stay weird, Austin.

    Indeed. last time I was there I thought I was going to have fight an under the bridge dweller. Don’t touch my car mutherfucker.

  13. dbleagle

    Some excitement at the shit shack. I was watching Super Bowl highlights and bolt of lightning his the tsunami siren about 150ft from my chair. Heck of a boom and it lit up the inside of the house.

    Hopefully Broadway Joe holds onto to the lead.

    • The Bearded Hobbit

      I’ll bet on it.

  14. Evan from Evansville

    We doin’ a talkie?

    • Ted S.

      No, just silent movies.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Huh, pegged you for a vaudeville kinda guy.

      • Ted S.

        I’ll kindly ask you not to peg me, thank you very much.

      • Trigger Hippie

        …I’m a lonely man.

      • Ted S.

        Take a twenty and go downtown.

      • R.J.

        Nice. Watching Creature on Svengoolie with the Spaniard. We are outside. Good weather tonight. I dropped you an email.

  15. Michael Malaise

    Stayed awhile at the Hotel Schweizerhof in Luzern, Switzerland. They have 101 “Storytelling” rooms that are based off previous guests who have stayed there. I was lucky enough to get the Nena room. It had red balloon wall graphics and a record player in the room with several of her albums available.

    • dbleagle

      In NYC the Library Hotel is a few steps from the Main Branch of the NY Library. It is 10 stories tall and the in each room are a bunch of books from that number in the Dewey Decimal system. The 10th floor has a bar and breakfast place filled with books. It is a great place for a bibliophile.

  16. Brochettaward

    One Firstserker will be worth a thousand seconder lives on the battlefield.

    • MikeS

      The Great Firsters Council does not approve of you blabbing all our battle plans. Loose lips and all that.

      • Brochettaward

        Child of seconding, you know not of what you speak. And when the armies of First and second meet to decide the fate of man as I begin my ascension, you will feel a defeat and sense of shame that you did not, in your vain and feeble seconding mind, know even existed.

  17. Stillhunter

    Accuweather real feel(tm) is like QBR, a made up marketing number. We had -30 real scale(tm) night before last and it wasnโ€™t even a thing. Car started right up for work in the morning. Hell itโ€™s been a nice winter so far. Only a couple cold spells and nothing below -35 real scale(tm). Mostly teens and twenties for highs. Supposed to be sunny and near 40 next Wednesday. Thatโ€™s t shirt weather for crappie fishing in the ice. Bring the sunscreen! Cools off again after that though.

    • MikeS

      You tell ’em!

      ๐ŸงŠ๐ŸŸ๐Ÿบ

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I like my 62 degree highs, Im staying here. Manistee is a cold place.

      • MikeS

        Don’t blame you one bit. Stay warm, my friend. ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿป

  18. Ted S.

    Good morning, reprobates!

    • robodruid

      Good Morning:
      Insomnia.

      Planting some cold weather seeds for sprouting.
      cabbage, broccoli, kale.

      • Ted S.

        I work 6-2:30, so even on weekends I’m up early.

    • Sean

      *waves*

      ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

      • robodruid

        thumbs up

    • Not Adahn

      Good morning!

      To answer your question from yesterday: at -15 Lily goes out, explores, patrols, does her business, barks at what needs to be barked at then comes back inside. at +5, she’s returned to lying down on the back steps.

      • Ted S.

        ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Shirley Knott

      Morning all.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, Ted’S, ‘bodru, Sean, NA, Shirley, and Ssccrruuffyy!

      Choral music on the streaming satellite radio, and chai latte in my new catbutt mug! ๐Ÿ˜บ I’m truly livin’ the dream! ๐Ÿ˜

    • Sean

      Saturday/Sunday. Whatever. ๐Ÿ˜ž

  19. Sean

    Powerball is up to $700m

  20. Not Adahn

    I decided not to try and zero the dot yesterday. I’ll see if I can get it done at the range before the steel shoot today.

    Without my glasses, the RTS2 dot is much less starbursty than my Romeo5. Dunno if that’s purely due to the dot size, or if it’s an indicator of something else.

    • Sean

      At similar brightness settings?

      • Not Adahn

        Good point. No idea.

    • robodruid

      I wish nothing but the best for this man.
      But “minimally invasive”?

      • R C Dean

        Laparoscopic. Also called robotic surgery.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Sure, cutting loose an personโ€™s digestive system and rerouting it=minimally invasive. Itโ€™s like having an ingrown toenail taken care of.

      • rhywun

        That’s how they fixed my colon.

        It’s better than ripping the skin open, I guess.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      Weird Al approves

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      Bring on the EMP

    • Gender Traitor

      Ewww. Not only would I never want to meet her in person – I wouldn’t be able to hide my reaction – I wouldn’t want to meet anyone who found her attractive. ๐Ÿคข

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      Oyโ€ฆ

    • Gender Traitor

      โ€œI want to be an astrophysicist, and I want to study black holes and supernovas,โ€ he said to the station.

      Let me suggest one particular person you should NOT emulate, young man.