It’s 1977. You parents gave you money to see one movie. The theater has Star Wars and Abar: Black Superman. What do you do?
Abar: Black Superman
Two weeks’ ago, it was suggested that we celebrate Black History Month with some Blaxploitation movies. Done! TedS suggested Abar: Black Superman and I jumped on it. It’s a fantastic over the top look at what lefties think of white people. It’s a combination of two genres – Nazisploitation and Blaxsploitation. Even more interesting, it came out the same year as Shock Waves, the famous movie with undead Nazis goose stepping underwater. 1977 must have been a “high water mark” for schlock. I mean after you watch Star Wars, Smokey and the Bandit, and Close Encounters of the Third Kind, what do you watch next? Abar: Black Superman!
This was worth a revisit. Forty-six years after Abar: Black Superman was made, we all know what racist fascists white people are.* I can only assume that young, impressionable CRT advocates saw this on TV in the eighties and mistook it for reality. The cartoon-like Anglo-Nazi scenes are over the top. A laugh-riot!
No doubt the editing gave kids ADHD – Abar: Black Superman was cut by 17 minutes (seemingly at random) to fit show times. Damn. What a loss.* The movie should have cut some more in the opening. There is only so much whitey bashing anyone can take, regardless of your race. As it is, you have to wait until the last 1/3 of the movie to see the lead character do his thing.
And what a thing it is! He performs miracles like turning booze into milk (Christ, what an asshole) and putting snakes in women’s beds. Overall, this movie is a disjointed mess which earns its 4.2 out of 10 on IMDB. Now that being said,… Most of the movies I post are in the threes. So… A step up?
So watch! Or don’t! Everything is voluntary until you end up in a whitey re-education camp! Next week it’s time for something almost new: Dead Ant! Rock stars, babes, Indians, giant ants and Peyote! Oh my!
*Sarcasm Trigger Warning.
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(h/t: The Hyperbole)
This movie is so black it stole my TV.
“It’s a fantastic over the top look at what lefties think of white people.”
Honestly, back in 1977 there were plenty of white people who didn’t want blacks in their neighborhood.
I met a lot of white people in 1977. Only one out of about 200 acted like this. And that person was avoided by everyone else.
Is that the only year you met a lot of white people?
I have proper counts for each year.
*hits play*
Abar v Star Wars in 1977?
Sorry, bro. Star Wars (again).
My posse and I had passed around the novel before we had any clue there was a movie (high school frosh and sophomores). We lost our minds when the movie came out. Like The Matrix, you had to be there to comprehend the impact those movies had.
The first Star Wars is great. Unlike all the sequels, prequels, and whatever.
Wrong. Empire is the best.
Empire was good, but I wouldn’t feel like I had gotten kicked in the testes by a film ending like that until Kill Bill 1 many years later.
Kill Bill == awesomesauce
“Wrong. Empire is the best.”
Congratulations, this is worse than saying Jethro Tull is better than Black Sabbath. Quite a week here.
Jethro Tull is better than Black Sabbath
Tallest midget.
Don’t feel sorry. Nobody else chose Abar either.
I was only like 6, but I remember seeing Star Wars when it first came out. It was in the Beverly Theater in Valdosta, GA – an old 1-screen theater in a ’50s (probably) shopping center. Building’s still there, even.
I still insist “Star Wars” refers explicitly to that first movie, and if any yoots try to call it that other name around me I pretend that no sound is coming out of their mouths.
At the Forum 303 in Arlington TX, one of my friends was hired to paint a mural for Star Wars for the release. It was still there until the theater was decommissioned in the 90’s.
Similar (same age) – saw it in Gloucester, MA, where my father returned during the summers to commercial fish (he was a teacher).
I remember being wildly entertained.
In Phoenix only one movie theater took a chance on Star Wars pre-release. They got the company to sign an exclusive rights for that theater for the entire largest metro area in Arizona. (Phoenix….spit) The theater had one really big screen and a new sound sytem. They showed SW for close on two years multiple screenings and made mucho muchos dineros.
My friend had already seen SW but when we were up in the Phx area for a wilderness climb he added time so we could watch it. He lead me nearish the front and in the center and I was “whatever”. When the lights went down, the sound went up and the star destroyer filled the entire space in front of me, I was impressed.
It was them first movie I saw more than once in a theater. I think the only other one was Casablanca, which I have seen a couple of times, both in restored/historic theaters. I can’t recall any others.
The second one was great. The third one, I felt uneasy, and basically checked out. I’ve seen some of the subsequent ones, but I couldn’t really tell you which ones, even. Except for Rogue One, which I liked in general (the CGI resurrections were kind of squicky, though).
I went by myself to see
RevengeReturn and I bought a pack of trading cards later.Same. I was like 7 or 8.
It’s hard to overstate what a juggernaut that movie was.
I have a vivid memory of my family dragging me out during the end credits and I didn’t want to go because I didn’t want it to end and I liked the music so much.
It was Yuuge!
I remember seeing it when I was like six, and that was the first movie I remember standing in line for. And I remember a young couple getting to the theater late and having to sit one row apart, and they held hands over the seat back.
Jaws and Star Wars started the modern blockbuster era.
My mom wouldn’t let me see Jaws.
Star Wars was a book before it was a movie? That can’t be right.
I remember reading the book in high school and it read like a weak film adaptation so maybe it was one of those concurrent things.
All I know is, we read the book before the movie was released. I wish I still had it – a paperback, but still a first edition, I remember that. We beat the hell out of it, though, so I doubt it would be worth much.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Wars:_From_the_Adventures_of_Luke_Skywalker, I’m guessing?
Ghostwritten by Alan Dean Foster!
I read the novelization of The Terminator long before I was actually able to see it.
Lucas later explained that the first film was written in the era of Richard Nixon, when the story was intended to explore “how a democracy turns itself over to a dictator—not how a dictator takes over a democracy.”
Lucas has always been a douchebag.
We need to remove the vestiges of the dictator Nixon. Such as the EPA.
Don’t forget the Viet Ewoks.
The original planet of wookies would have been much better.
You don’t think that seeing the mightiest force in the universe getting their ass kicked byT eddy Ruxpin dolls was amenable to the storyline where they’re very, very powerful?
Wookies tearing stormtroopers limb from limb would have been entertaining but might have changed the rating, lol.
Penguin, the meek shall inherit the empire?
Plinker762 – might be great for faith, not so great for dramatic storytelling.
That’s weird the novelization would be available before the film. But I guess anything is possible in Hollywood.
Star Wars was the first movie I ever saw, not in 77 as I was only 2, but in 1980 when it was on its second release at the drive ins. We went in their old school wooden paneled station wagon and sat in the back with a bunch of blankets. It was awesome.
I remember when we went to see E.T. StarWars was playing in the second theater and my dad ducked out to see SW. I should have followed him.
I remember seeing ET and hating it. Every girl who heard that thought I was a monster.
I’ve never seen it and never will. I hated it from the first commercial.
Very smart.
Second.
The S.L.A. sign == Symbionese Liberation Army?
Didn’t notice that.
My version is 1:41 How long is the one on tubi?
1:42.04. Close enough to be a rounding error.
True, thanks 🙂
Fan of SLA Marshall?
I’m wondering too. It doesn’t really fit with the rest of the sign but who knows.
putting snakes in women’s beds
These euphemisms.
I would have seen Star Wars instead.
I’m going to watch this tomorrow. I have a little work to get done around the house tonight. Thanks RJ!
It’s a fantastic over the top look at what lefties think of white people.
I dunno, it’s pretty subtle so far.
I think I’ve had enough in the last few years of what lefties think of white people, sheesh.
“We interrupt this program for a news bulletin…”
I like these realistic details.
The doctor has the reddest red kitchen in the history of kitchens.
Coolio – the actress who played young Debbie chimed in on IMDB:
https://www.imdb.com/review/rw3459820/?ref_=ext_shr_lnk
She gave it a 5 out of 10 🙂
That’s great!
The Mission Impossible rip-off score could use some variety.
That requires a budget.
I may be farther ahead than everyone – The boy calls his sister a “Watusi Wobbler” when she told him to not go to the park. This is the song from the Profiles:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUFI73f5l64
Just got to that line.
There’s also the western movie dream sequence, and the spectacularly inapt use of the “I Have a Dream” speech.
You know, I didn’t look up the box office for this one but I think it probably booked less than “Shock Waves.”
A classic collective what? Cobbage?
Cribbage?
No idea. They didn’t get the best sound men.
You mean, the Radio Shack microphone wasn’t functioning properly?
Tagline: What It Was … What It Is … What It Ought To Be!
You dig?
Can you dig it!? Caaaaan yooooo diiigggg iittt!?
I think Black Dynamite and Undercover Brother have spoiled me. The original blaxploitation films are awesome in their own way but just don’t measure up to the awesomeness of those films.
The gangs in Warriors were mostly white.
So were the gangs in West Side Story.
That was a frequent tagline in The Stand IIRC.
(dammit, got it wrong)
I wonder if you can find the edited for tv versions of some of the R rated movies of the 70’s and 80’s.
There were a few so full of “unacceptable” content, that they had to change the entire plot and added bs cut scenes. Cheech and Chong’s the next move comes to mind. Instead of a duffel bag of weed there was a bag of diamonds, instead of getting high the goal was to build a cheech and Chong playground.
This one is actually a good example of this. It did get recut for TV, ad I believe the running time dropped to around 102 minutes (from 142). That’s a boat load of cuts.
I also remember seeing Animal House on TV, all the original music was removed. Any background music was replaced with 80s music. Surreal.
Wow.
I am going to drop off early, been a long few weeks. Like Bro says, I’ll probably be back in an hour.
Reason email…
Did you ghost us?
Our bad.
If your relationship with us lost its spark, it’s on us to spice it up. 🔥
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Well, then they must be like a pig in shit these days.
I’m pleased to say I haven’t gotten that. It’s entirely possible the email address they have for me is one I abandoned years ago due to the infestation of spam.
Yeah, they finally stopped sending me the magazine a couple years ago. I’m still using all my old email addresses – I think I just dropped off their radar after not giving them any money for a few years.
I got it. Promptly deleted it.
*Insert “I don’t think about you at all” meme*
To answer the question: in ’77 it would have been Star Wars.
Today: since I am a man of refined and sensitive tastes, I would instantly and happily choose Abar Black Superman.
What!? Not Smokey and the Bandit!
For shame.
This movie is so unrealistic. White people don’t have time to picket.
I’m confused as to why the police officers wear helmets in their squad cars.
No air bags in ’77.
Why do people wear masks in their cars?
I remember the 77 release of Star Wars. My dad and I went to the local mall with a theatre for the matineè. The lines were short.
When we came out, they ran the length of the mall for the next show.
Had to pause for a bit, so still catching up.
Those whores sure are dressed nicely. Not like street hos today.
My Google Map Fu isn’t helping me try to find out where this house on the corner is. Looks like Westwood, but nothing comes up. Maybe I’ll catch a street sign.
Star Wars or Abar: Black Superman – I’m going with Smokey and the Bandit.
fin
That last little reveal was quite something.
I can’t believe they got Lon Chaney to be in this movie.
I saw him walking with the Queen
Rah-hoo!
Abar spittin’ truths about government programs.
Libertarian moment!
The through the looking glass version of I have information that will convict Hillary Clinton.
https://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2023/02/23/convicted-murderer-uses-last-words-before-execution-to-claim-ron-desantis-has-done-a-lot-worse/
Sigh.
“They also note another possible catalyst for the turn against the grain: DeSantis’ widely expected run for president in 2024.”
Never change, The Tallahassee Democrat.
I’m against the death penalty but using it as a political football is… unseemly.
He is a criminal but he isn’t stupid.
https://dailycaller.com/2023/02/23/bankman-fried-straw-donors-woke-pac-funding-democrat/
All of that is way too inside-baseball for me but I’d settle for a re-vote on every candidate he supported.
RJ, I got a movie that could work as a Glibflick or just if you want to watch something bizarre. It is a 1993 NBC made for TV movie adaptation of Journey to the Center of the Earth. It’s something that for a long time I only remembered like a fever dream, where they find a Yeti living inside the earth and he joins their crew and where the center of earth is ruled over by some kind of evil cyborg guy. I just learned right before I found this link that Sam Raimi has a cameo roll! And sure enough, there he is with like 2 lines at the beginning.
93?! Gotta be among the last of a dying breed. I can’t imagine one of the big three networks putting something like this out today when there’s some cheap reality or “news” shit they could throw out there.
https://jacksoncountyor.org/Whats-New/News/special-recognition-presentation-mike-kuntz
*snicker*
‘Koonts’, damnit!
I wish my county had a make work video production job I grift on. 🎥🐳
* Hunter has entered the chat *
koonts-koonts-koonts-koonts
Well we haven’t made the frogs gay test, but the dammed geese are all f’ed up. I can hear them circling my house as they are flying north? In February?
I know rule #1 of the internet is “don’t read the comments”, but belatedly watching a Drinker video on “Velma” and saw this gem:
“I’ve seen porn parodies be more faithful to source material then the goddamn Velma show”
😀
That’s gold. Some of the comments to his videos are as funny as The Drinker.
Yet here we are.
We are the comments.
Don’t read us,
I just leave comments, I don’t read any of you lunatics.
My threading is just mysteriously apropos.
You’re fishing for compliements about how badly you lie, aren’t yout?
I’ve been told I’m a bot on other sites so I read but my responses are programmed.
The comments are where the Firsts are at. What kind of crazy son-of-a-bitch wouldn’t read a First?
Scooby Doo without the dog is one of the stupidest ideas for a TV show to ever be greenlighted.
Bro, Velma was the real star of Scooby Doo.
That’s certainly what my penis said.
I have asked many times where the white bitches are at…
But perhaps it is time I start to ponder where the First bitches be at?
They were done before you showed up.
I’m feeling like a last bitch at the moment.
Had a shitty evening in DivorceLand.
This too shall pass;,but I’m not up to Firsting form.
I’d still rather read you than Bro.
Awww. Thanks, Ted.
💕😘
Waffle House is only orders to go at 5am.
I learned something today.
That and the night crew plays hip-hop at 120dB.
Mornin ☕
Around 10 PM pizza is delivery only, no takeout.
HLN switches from Forensic Files to CNN at 3AM pacific.
*TV off*
The crimes depicted on Forensic Files pale in comparison to what CNN does to the truth.
What kind of high crime area Waffle House are you trying to eat at?
The chair flinging kind?
Those used to be the only ones that stooped to takeout only but some started doing that during Covid and haven’t stopped maybe.
The kind where you can’t understand the waitress because she’s being drowned out by Lizzo?
“Only 19% Of Americans Have Confidence In Biden’s Handling Of Ukraine Conflict, New Poll Finds”
https://www.zerohedge.com/political/only-19-americans-have-confidence-bidens-handling-ukraine-conflict-new-poll-finds
I never thought I’d see the day that 81% of Americans are frigging TRAITORS. They’re going to need bigger camps.
The entire country is becoming a camp. The tax authorities have already taken a line from The Eagles — you can check out, but you can never leave.
We’ll make it up in volume.
It’s not a competition between I-95 and the VRE. It’s between commuting and WFH. Will you join cities in demanding people be forced to commute to save your revenue?
Good morning, Roat, Stinky, HE (if you’re still awake,) Sean, and Ssccrruuffyy! Back home from travels and up for a dentist appointment I set long before I knew I’d be taking this week off from work. 😕
Yuck. Dentist appointment while on vacation? I hope it’s a walk in the park.
Good morning to you, too, Shirley! Did you get clobbered with snow up there in the mitten? Heard they got it bad up in the UP, of course. Weather down here has been unseasonably warm (but windy) and yesterday was downright gorgeous – hated to check out of the state park lodge. Today it’s back to being typical February frigid. 🥶
Not much snow to speak of, but a fair coating of ice. That’s mid-Michigan, I suspect other areas got hit harder. I was fortunate/sensible enough to arrange my affairs such that I didn’t have to leave the apartment yesterday, and today should be the same. Managed to get my grocery shopping done early Wednesday before anything had started up.
We’re supposed to alternate between unseasonably warm and seasonally unpleasant over the next week or so. I, for one, would appreciate some sunshine, regardless of what else the weather is up to 😉
Gah. In the last hour Weather Underground has updated today’s forecast from ‘partly cloudy’ to ‘snow this morning, tapering off by afternoon, with later peeks of sun’. Bleah.
❄❄❄😣❄❄❄
GSA*: Double-checked and confirmed this – Mrs. ‘patzie’s hip replacement is today. Just FYI in case you care to send positive thoughts their way in whatever form you choose.
I’m off to brush my teeth, then out the door to get them scraped at the dentist. 😣🦷
*Glib Service Announcement
I hope for all the best and a recovery as smooth as it can be.