Good afternoon and welcome to the links. It’s Spring Break so we’re up in North Florida hanging at a big, empty beach. Today is rainy and cool, so suboptimal beach weather. The kids don’t care. As soon as the rain let up they were in water I hope not to have to go get anyone from.
The Crystal (meth) Pellikan sounds like a tourist shop around here.
Clown punches magician at sea.
All your Tesla are belong to us
Ugh, don’t give the movie money people a reason to like Tampa look what they did to Colorado and Austin
I love this collaboration
She was asleep on meth?
That dropoff is a real bitch.
It’s not crack. Meth has a pretty long tail.
Another word (phrase) for the day. Why I love this place.
She’s not doing it right.
Okay, I was about to start looking it up because I was also confused.
Who among us hasn’t passed out at a Circle K while stoned and armed?
I have not.
Didn’t have your sleeping gloves?
I don’t get stoned, and plan better sleeping locations than the Circle K.
I hear strange things are afoot there.
Nice.
“Be excellent to each other, and party on dudes” does have a libertarian feel to it.
LOL
Legit LOL
Would you remember if you had?
I don’t think you can get your license here without proving you’ve done it once.
When you wake up its immediately to a Waffle House right?
I… I… feel so inadequate.
Well Circle K’s didn’t exist here until I was well past the days of passing out in a car.
Strange things are afoot at the Circle K
Yeah, it’s not like he was a mime.
That guy pulled off the ultimate trick – make the magician disappear.
Credit Suisse ain’t looking so hot. Their credit default swaps are though.
https://cms.zerohedge.com/s3/files/inline-images/bfmB64E_1.jpg?itok=bQJMU4zE
“Clown punches magician at sea.”
Eh, I’m not a fan either. Justified by the totality of the circumstances.
“All your Tesla are belong to us“
Back in ye olden times, when car keys were, you know, keys, there was a finite number of key patterns. Other than myself, I know two people that I can think of that got into somebody else’s car and started it up by accident. I got into a Nova that was the same color as mine, started it up, and then noticed that the interior was different. I got out, locked it, got into my car a couple of spots over, and drove off.
So, nothing new under the sun, etc.
I tried those horrible keyless entry and igition cars on a rental. I hated the darn thing. I could never be sure it was actually locked, and not having a physical key to start it just felt wrong.
The wife’s aunt had one of those cars. One day she had her hands full and put the keys on top of the car, and forgot about them. The car started and she took off. Seems the key doesn’t need to be IN the car to work. They never found the keys, and the replacement was pretty expensive.
Almost boarded a plane after returning rental car with them in my jacket pocket…was very glad I found them prior to going through security and such.
You just needed to go back to hide your parachute.
I found my rental’s just as I was about to board the shuttle bus. Also glad I found them.
I <3 keyless entry and keyless ignition.
LOVE IT.
Why?
No fumbling with keys. The fob just sits in my pocket. There’s no need for a key ring, or to be attached to a set of keys.
To unlock, you just grab the handle. To lock, you just touch the outside of the handle.
How do you know it’s actually lcoked when you backhand the handle? Testing that presumption will cause it to unlock anyway.
It goes “click”, and the lights flash. You get an audible and visual confirmation.
Then there’s a itty bitty red LED that flashes near the front of the door panel. And an OCD double checker indicator.
It unlocks with a hand inside the handle.
So if your fob is inside the car, you’re stopped, any random passer-by could get in too?
No.
It knows fob inside vs. outside. It’s not just proximity.
That roof story from ToK says otherwise.
I don’t know on car but my car complains if you try to lock with keys inside or try to start with keys outside.
^ Another vote for keyless entry and keyless ignition.
It doesn’t really save any time for me, but it does for my wife who has to fumble in her purse for keys. Sometimes in dark parking lots. I also have two padlocked gates across the driveway and it’s far easier to not have to turn the car off and on to unlock the gates. Before it comes up (my neighbors always ask while they watch me do the gates), it’s not worth spending $10k for reliable automatic gate openers. Besides, the kids are finally old enough to get out and open the gates.
I am also on the <3 keyless bandwagon.
Its a small thing but its nice not having to carry keys.
Leaving the phone in the vehicle is basically the same as leaving the keys in the vehicle, so its not that different really. You just change where your hands go when parked – instead of the steering column, your hand goes to the phone dock.
There are alternative things to use as a key such as rings or other things that are attached to your body that you are unlikely to forget – a watch would be the most ideal.
You and me both, Sean. The new Toyota has that. Es bueno.
Oh, and I can check on my phone to see if the car is locked. If it isn’t, I can lock it from anywhere. Also remote start, which I doubt I’ll ever use, but you never know.
When it’s twenty-five below, that remote start can be pretty handy.
My wife wants remote start for cold days. I told her it would be less expensive to clean the dumping zone she created in the garage so her car would fit.
That… that I don’t like, nor trust. If you can access it from anywhere, anyone (with enough time and knowledge) can access it from anywhere.
We are getting to the point were a key, much like a manual transmission or, even more confounding, a kick start motorcycle, are the ultimate antitheft devices.
Yep. Did that with my old Exploder. Got in, looked down at the cup holder where I normally keep change and saw everything was different. Locked their car and moved onto mine.
typo checks out
I’ve done that (GM). Another time a friend locked his keys in his car. I opened his door with my key (GM again).
If you’d like to try stealing a new Kia Telluride, if the mirrors aren’t pointed in toward the door, the door is unlocked.
Most new makes, apparently.
I’m sick of motors getting added to parts that don’t need them. That’s just a future repair waiting to happen.
On the plus side, not sticking out along narrow streets or in parking stalls.
I’m not parking anywhere that doesn’t have enough clearance for side mirrors. How will I open the door if its that snug?
It’s a German thing. I guess the Koreans are copying it now.
I’m not gonna say it is impossible that a bug/exploit allowed this, but there is more likely an innocent explanation.
I have on occasion gotten into ours with my phone’s bluetooth off, but wife’s phone is close enough that it will unlock when I get in, and allow me to drive.
When I get down the street it will tell me that I can continue the current drive, but if I park I’ll need a key to activate.
If the owner of the car that wandered was close enough by – say he had his car parked right in front of a shop he was visiting, then the car may have felt he was close enough to allow it to unlock and drive off.
Lots of people leave the fob in the car. Or I just heard last week about a car theft where the guy kept the spare of the wife’s car in his car. Now, this isn’t a problem at work, but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out the extra fob belongs to the car parked next to it when both cars are in the driveway.
but yes, everyone should test the range at which your car will recognize the fob and allow start anyway. People leave them on bedroom dressers or inside the front door, thinking that’s enough, but sometimes that’s actually only a few feet away.
In my experience its about 30 ft for a Tesla, but local conditions can of course alter things
For the Tesla in the article a Fob wasn’t mentioned, but FOBs aren’t commonly used
Toyota used to be (in)famous for having keys that were on the easily replicable side. Not much in the way of wards and the teeth were pretty similar across models. Resulted in a lot of keys being modified to open all Toyotas.
“Ugh, don’t give the movie money people a reason to like Tampa look what they did to Colorado and Austin”
*Begins praying*
I wouldn’t worry too much — look how they turned on Georgia when they didn’t approve of the politics. Darth Santis will surely keep them away for at least another couple of years.
But I want a good 20+ years…
President Deathsantis will send them to Canada for 8 years.
I was at a nice north Florida beach yesterday and the weather was perfect. Today not so much, which was okay as we had to drive home.
Just got here two days ago. In Panama City.
Bluebird skies, but it’s going to be a bit cool for the next few days.
Try Sharkey’s for dinner. We were there in January.
We were at St. Augustine.
Our spring break is a week from Friday. We’re heading to Port Aransas, TX so hopefully it warms up by then.
Catch some Redfish for me. Some of the best fishing I ever had was out there.
Good luck. We spent spring break in Corpus Christi a few years ago and it was frigid.
Well, the place is named after a dead body.
Maybe a pathologist we come by looking to get pregnant.
Did that with my old Exploder. Got in, looked down at the cup holder where I normally keep change and saw everything was different. Locked their car and moved onto mine.
I would be asking myself, “How the fuck did my door get locked?”
When you say something thinking you are making a point but that point is completely opposite of what you meant. She is out of practice.
WE already knew this from our Wednesday reading.
That’s quite the self-own.
Ol’ Joe and I are about the same age. I mentioned this morning how my sleep habits seem to have extended to 9-10 hours. I’m guessing Ol’ Joe is enjoying the same problem. Maybe at a certain age most things are not so important.
Economy collapses-Take a look in the morning when I wake up
War in some far off unlocatable place-Take a look in the morning when I wake up
“Is there a doctor in the house? Fauci is spotted jumping into action wearing a tux at Gridiron dinner for Washington elite after a woman passed out and hit her head on the table”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11852141/Fauci-spotted-jumping-action-Gridiron-dinner-woman-passed-hit-head.html
Was she smoking meth?
Just how bad has everything gotten? Well I believe she is a plant and this story is false to help ‘bolster’ Fauci’s image as someone who cares about us.
You
Are
Not
Alone
👆
Were there air raid sirens?
“Quick! Circle those wagons! We need feel good stories for our beloved Saint Covidicus!”
So, he pushed her into a table so he could “Help”?
Someone told him she was a real legal beagle and his instincts kicked in.
She saw a fly in her soup.
Did he check her vax status first?
Who was that masked man…
I wouldn’t let him treat a cadaver.
Well, he probably wouldn’t get pregnant.
…or get anyone else pregnant…
Anthony Quinn (supposedly) did.
Did the Quinns have a pool?
Fauci, who hasn’t treated a patient in 50 years? What did he do, apply leeches?
Slapped a mask on her and gave her an mRNA shot.
Grabbed an onion from the kitchen and added it to her belt.
In other Spring Break news
“The bender pay gap: US women are now binge drinking more than men for first time in history, Biden’s alcohol czar reveals”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-11854253/Women-binge-drinking-men-time-history.html
Alcohol czar?
I love that guy! From the Smirnoff commercials!
What a country!
Given that the article is mainly talking about college aged folks — maybe a significant portion of the men have realized they need to keep their faculties given if she’s drunk it is non-consensual, but if he or both are drunk, it is still on him. I know college aged dudes can be dumb, but at this point, that is becoming basic survival.
At what point does some brave (and dumb) recent college grad decide to start up a legitimate gentleman’s club?
Was just going to say it’s because there are more women college students than men now.
Stop stealing my thoughts.
“New York City’s Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) office is “fully booked through October 2032” for appointments to process migrants released at the southern border, according to an official document exclusively reviewed by The Post — making the Big Apple the ideal destination for migrants with dubious asylum claims and causing a massive headache for those with valid ones.
The backlog means migrants may have to wait almost a decade just to enter the immigration court process — which is beset by further delays stretching out years, sources said.”
https://nypost.com/2023/03/13/nyc-ice-office-fully-booked-for-migrant-appointments-through-late-2032/
What a clusterfuck.
Thank goodness for all those empty hotels where we can give them free room & board while they wait.
I don’t see how anything could go wrong. NYC is awash in extra cash isn’t it?
“causing a massive headache for those with valid ones”
I’m sure they are both pissed off about it.
DACA smiles.
“Rock-throwing baboons break hikers’ legs: ‘Exploded on impact
If this interspecies stoning was indeed on purpose, it wouldn’t be the first time lower primates have displayed shockingly human-like behavior. In January, footage emerged of vengeful monkeys beating and attempting to drown a thieving rat for stealing their food at a zoo in China.
In a far more brutal example of simian vengeance in 2021, murderous macaques in India threw 250 dogs off the tops of trees and buildings as apparent revenge for killing one of their babies.”
https://nypost.com/2023/03/13/rock-throwing-baboons-break-hikers-legs-exploded-on-impact/
Gotta love headlines. I was thinking the leg exploded on impact.
That story is full of great band names.
I saw Thieving Rat open for Vengeful Monkeys at Lollapalloza back in ’05.
Murderous Macaques is much better in that genre.
Interspecies Stoning really opened my eyes
Yeah… they really exploded onto the scene, didn’t they?
This is why the NYP is an insitution.
Woody Harrelson.
Reply Fail to “Alcohol Czar?”
When it’s Spring Break, Florida Man takes his act on the road.
A Florida man faces federal charges in a conspiracy to transport over $430,000 worth of stolen king crab from Stanwood to Florida…
I was confused until I read that it was king crab, since most people are perfectly able to catch crabs in Florida without much effort.
Stone crab, blue crab, and crotch crab all abound in the State.
Mmmmm. Crotch crab.
Nutty, with a piquant aftertaste?
Australia — continuing to lead the world in Fucked Up Governments You Used To Think Were Sane.
Anyone else dragging ass due to daylight savings time? I am Keurig’s best customer today.
Just morning time. I think with auto-clock adjustments, seems more seamless.
Yeah, I did not want to get up this morning. Fine now.
Yes. I had three days of hockey this weekend, the Mrs. had her first roller derby game after coming out of retirement, and then the time change. I have that new virus from China: Dragon Ass.
Due to DST – no
Due to my own insistence on staying up late no matter what time I need to wake up – yes
In St. John’s, Newfoundland, I came out of a store, walked to my rental car (a maroon Oldsmobile Alero), unlocked the door with my key fob, got in, started the engine with the key, and then realized I was in someone else’s car. Mine was parked two rows over.
Oooo
Slap Fight!
https://citizenfreepress.com/breaking/shots-fired-between-steve-bannon-and-elon-musk/
Bannon and his China fetish yet again.
In Steve’s mind, there’s a chink behind every bush just waiting to slant eye him to death.
Sharks with razors strapped to their heads?
Week is n:t off to a good start. Bank stock lost $27k. Not good omen for Thursday eye surgery – doc says 10 percent chance of permanent blindness in one eye.
Sorry, creech. Eye injury?
Cataract
My wife and I have had the cataract surgery. I didn’t see any improvement. My glasses keep getting thicker and are looking like coke bottle bottoms. My wife said hers didn’t seem any different either.
I’m grateful to see well enough with the glasses, however..
In any case, double good luck, most people get positive results from the surgery.
It helped my mom a bunch.
Gotcha. Good luck and we’ll all hope for a cataract reduction and a stock elevation!
Agent Sloper’s ecstatic over his.
Or, well, as ecstatic as Agent Sloper can get.
Sorry about the eye but optimistically 90%. Good luck on the surgery.
I’ve given up getting too concerned about the market losses. I think of it as losing the money when I bought in to the program. Didn’t lose any until I want to sell.
Eye patch soap opera guy gets all the chicks, so there’s that.
Not as much as the Old Spice guy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owGykVbfgUE
Sorry.
Yes, please, do that…
https://www.zerohedge.com/political/us-intel-agencies-need-focus-intensely-diversity-equity-inclusion-intelligence-chief-says
Special guest appearance by asshat extraordinaire:
I guess they aren’t counting Chinese as minorities, then.
Maybe if they spend more time bean-counting they’ll spend less time harassing innocent Americans.
It will change who they consider innocent.
I can see a strong argument that it’s useful to recruit people who understand the language and the cultural nuances of the countries you are spying on (almost all of them). By default that would likely lead to a diverse workforce. Not sure how equity and inclusion work into that though.
I love the Internet
*chef’s kiss*
Bravo, indeed!
From that I’ve found my new hero.
https://twitter.com/CramerTracker
I’m forced to watch CNBC at work. He is just awful. Neither entertaining or professionally useful.
“reverse barometer”
Investigators in central Florida found a woman asleep at the wheel of her car at a gas pump, with a firearm in her lap.
Was that wrong?
“If it’s COVID, Paxlovid.”
Make it stop!
With the world the way it is today, we’re never going to survive unless we get a little Crazy. So many dumb things in the news to make fun of makes it hard to pick one for a cartoon.
Your choice will be like being kissed by a rose.
“State Representative Liz Harris issued a brief statement on Monday as Republicans in the state legislature criticized her for bringing Jacqueline Breger before a hearing on election security.
Breger made unverified allegations that drug cartels were engaged in paying bribes to public officials in Arizona, including judges and elected officials such as Democratic Governor Katie Hobbs.
Following backlash that included strong criticism from her fellow GOP lawmakers, Harris issued a statement on messaging app Telegram on Friday that read: “What was presented at Thursday’s hearing was not sufficient to substantiate these extraordinary claims.””
https://www.newsweek.com/arizona-republican-issues-statement-amid-backlash-drug-cartel-claims-liz-harris-1784550
That still doesn’t mean it isn’t true.
“Designate the Mexican drug cartels “terrorist organizations”? Wow, great idea. Few policies have such a clear track record of success as sprawling drug interdiction campaigns. Throw in a new “War on Terrorism” framework, and you’re sure to get the epitome of flawless statecraft”
https://twitter.com/mtracey/status/1635424444972937216
Reason # 534,009 drugs should be legal.
“Full List of 26 Republicans Who Refused To Denounce White Supremacy
When asked for comment, a spokesperson for Oversight Committee member Rep. Anna Paulina Luna noted that the Republican has stated in the past: “We don’t have a white supremacy problem, we have an illegal immigration problem.”
https://www.newsweek.com/republicans-denounce-white-supremacy-letter-raskin-1786300
HAWT