If STEVE SMITH had an uncle, it would be this guy. Looks like he listens to loud 80s rock, he’s balding, probably drives a Trans Am with a peeling hood chicken which he stole from a camper.
And now, a movie which accurately predicted the future. Hear me out:
- The world is destroyed by fighting politicians.
- Karens now rule the world.
- Men are demoted to playthings and slaves.
- Everyone uses ridiculous slang that disconnects them from the past.
What did this film get wrong about the future? Apparently, people still respect the office of the president in the future. That’s the only part they got wrong. Things I love about this film:
- Lead guy (yes, that is Chuck Wagner) wears mascara the whole movie.
- Lead girl (Laurene Landon) has the most amazing post-apocalyptic blow dry hair ever. In fact, all of the womenfolk have perfect 80’s hair.
- STEVE SMITH’s uncle is in this film. I really need his photo with the boombox and flag on a T shirt. He just pops up with no explanation. I don’t even think his actual name is mentioned in the film. He’s called Aargh the Awful in the credits.
- People are shot dead by pistol crossbows that look like they are made of cardboard and wouldn’t penetrate wet toast.
Laurene Landon did not like working on this film. She went on strike for the crew, which had not been paid in weeks. IMDB says she went on strike because she was not paid. This is wrong. In an interview Laurene stated it was because the crew was not getting paid. Also during filming the desert got up to 130 F (That’s 54.4 C for those of you living under communism). I am glad she toughed it out. America 3000 is immortal trash. Laurene was interviewed as part of Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films, where she actually set fire to a copy of the America 3000. Fantastic! Note: That is one hard documentary to source via legitimate streaming, so I linked to the trailer.
So watch! Or don’t! Everything is voluntary! Nobody says you have to be entertained by an awesome 1980s B movie! Next week, the year starts fresh. And what will I post? Share suggestions in the comments. Or share your New Years’ drink and food recipes. Or talk about your rhododendrons. No Rules Thursday is ready for your small talk.
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(h/t: The Hyperbole)
You had me with the soundtrack.
Tony Berg was a busy guy.
It was the 80s, wherever did they find the energy? *rolls up a $100 bill and pulls small vile of Bolivian marching powder hanging from gold chain around neck*
Right next to the sharks tooth?
Note: That is one hard documentary to source via legitimate streaming, so I linked to the trailer.
It *is* available on physical media. (I have a copy.)
I need to pick up a copy. You can go see it on Archive most likely, but I believe it paying for the view, unless absolutely unavoidable. I am hoping Tubi picks it up as part of their expanding documentary section.
Laurene Landon does not have a boobpedia page.
Diving in soon…..
https://www.mrskin.com/laurene-landon-nude-c7193
Dang. Link failed.
I forgot to mention she was in Maniac Cop 1 and 2 as Teresa Mallory.
I mentioned The First Nudie Musical (obviously NSFW) last week while you were one your cruise, but that’s leaving Tubi at the end of the month.
I saw that. Depressing. I have about ten suggestions which are staying, so I am not desperate.
Not titty enough for you? (Certainly not titty enough for Q.)
Oh I was going to post it. I wrote all the posts from Thanksgiving until now all in a few weeks in early November. I intended that to be one of the first in January. No dice, Tubi pulled it.
Considering the amount of stuff that leaves each month, it’s more likely that their rights to it just ran out. I think I blogged about three movies in November because they were leaving Tubi at the end of the month, and then two this month.
And then there was 1941, which Pluto had on demand for a while earlier this year, only for it to go missing for some time, but now it’s back. I don’t get the economics of the FAST platforms.
I don’t either. It’s like what happened with Hebrew Hammer this year – all the sudden for two weeks it became an exclusive and was pulled from Tubi. There mus be massive contracting teams for all this craziness.
It happens with music on Amazon Music, too. I finally had enough and bailed. I was actively using it and adding songs daily/weekly, and all of a sudden some would be gone at some point. The weirdest part was it wasn’t that artists were coming and going, it was just some songs. Frustrating.
I don’t use music services. I buy what I want.
If I were to buy everything I wanted, I’d need another full time job. Maybe two.
Your wife can arrange that.
Ok, I’m in. For the 80’s hair and tits.
Its some period-accurate hurr.
I have a semi.
Yeah. I miss those hairstyles.
Also during filming the desert got up to 130 F (That’s 54.4 C for those of you living under communism).
Not the first time.
Sold. When I watch this, I’m going to be eating a healthy salad and french fries.
Okay, maybe not. Maybe just fries with lots of catsup.
I had a burger tonight. The kitchen is not restocked since I got back from the cruise ship. I went straight back to work with the flu. It’s been balls. I crave salad.
Aloysious FTW.
Waif-fu, 80s style.
Holy shit they make the kids fight Steve Smith………..
STEVE SMITH’S UNCLE FULL OF PISS AND VINEGAR.
MOSTLY PISS. KID’S FIND OUT HARD WAY!
HAHAHA!
I have discovered the best use of leftover Prime Rib is a beef stroganoff sort of thing. Caramelized onions and caramelized mushrooms, stock/ausjus, sour cream, when warm add thin sliced prime rib until warm……good stuff.
The Great Numbering is coming, and you people don’t even realize it.
Can I get #69?
Dibs on 42
303. 303. Say it backwards, 303!
I call pi.
A tuning fork is the tiara symbol?
It’s the 1980s. I am surprised it wasn’t a miniature flying V guitar.
RIP Eddie VH
The password was USA001
Now I have to change the combination on my luggage!
I thought your password was “Password1234”.
It was until I saw Spaceballs.
Beware the Karen with a fabulous blowout.
All the women look like Texas lake girls I grew up with. I keep expecting to see them swaggering around with a Coors light can and an inner tube.
If that inner tube is a FUPA with a botched c-section scar, and that Coor’s Light a Texas Pride……I was there.
…Lake Travis 1989 or so
Lake Tawakoni. And later Texoma.
the blonde in the ski boat at Cedar Creek has major daddy issues that she didn’t fix at SMU or at law school, and she can’t even ride her fucking horses, and….and…
**runs from the room sobbing**
That’s a fancy Steyr Aug.
Oh, I am way behind you lot. Yes it is. I was wondering what you would think of that. It had to belong to someone on the staff. That would not be a cheap gun to stock for the set.
SOMEONE IS WRONG ON THE INTERNET!!!!!11!!!!
Perfect.
Pinball!
I wonder if there is a pinball wizard….
Has to be a trick.
Cigar boxes! I couldn’t tell if they were Cuban.
Probably fake. They always are.
Bondage coitus interruptus
Solemn swear. heh.
I am going to drop out early. Too much vacation, too much flu. You folks have a good time and pick up your empties on the way out!
Get well soon!
YOU ARE NOT MY SUPERVISOR!!!!11
“High level negotiations”
These euphemisms.
https://www.freep.com/story/news/politics/elections/2023/12/28/maine-removes-trump-from-ballot/72053502007/
They got him this time for sure!
What office of the government is a person awarded for winning a primary election? If the answer is ‘none,’ then the 14th Amendment doesn’t apply.
The 14th Amendment doesn’t apply because Trump hasn’t been convicted of 18 USC 2383.
If the law mattered, we wouldn’t have had the shenanigans that led to the protest tour in the first place.
Welcome to the rule of man.
Fuck Maine and the 127 people that live there.
That ending seemed a little… convenient.
“Laurene was interviewed as part of Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films, where she actually set fire to a copy of the America 3000.” Don’t leave me hanging R.J. What did burn? The script? Film negative? Producer?
Considering the hair spray, I think we know!
Her loins after she saw me drop a massive First.
I didn’t see you here over Christmas. I guess you were busy.
https://youtu.be/7doBMyEH_Ug?si=j4g2FAxNm0aVd_6q
I did drop a quick, late pm, Happy Hannukah to you a week-ish ago.
Have you seen this? Happy Hannukah, friend.
Oy vey!
Thanks MikeS. I think I have heard it. This is my new favorite Hanukkah song.
https://youtu.be/BiIpSp6dLjs?si=G6N8Vdpq_MNoTtdU
As much as I love the 80s hair- bangs are face-cancer
/no homo
How do you feel about blue eye shadow?
Is she wearing blue eye shadow? I’m okay with it if she is.
https://youtu.be/swPt9HBRXuE?si=ivnCxIlquyvpC8YX
Fuck You Al Michaels.
More of a Mike Tirico guy?
Does Mike Tirico pull the “it’s in the bag” jinx shit?
Meh. He’s just doing his job and calling the game like the majority of people want him to. People like you who disagree are obviously just whinging, extreme right/left wingers.
Look fat, when lower Canada has a team I’m listen to your opinion on football.
/takes a look at map
You’re Calling me lower Canada?
Does Ohio have a professional football team?
Glass houses and all…
One, and Ohio also firsted the fuck out of football
Leave it to Ohio to fuck a football.
Or a link.
You have to forgive The Hype. As much as he tries, he just cannot compete with the utter power and greatness of a Firster. It’s like an emaciated MTF trannie picking a fight with a top tier bodybuilder. Hollywood has perverted his pathetic mind into thinking that he can be my equal, but reality always wins out.
Masturbate To Falco?
Falco was a handsome fellow in a fey, Euro way, I suppose. No kink shaming.
Why Doesn’t North Dakota have a pro football team?
Because then
MinnesotaOhio would want one.I know it’s to Jewish for a few that hang out here, but I just learned that Two Chille participates in the Free Press comments.
Something is wrong…
Where is ZARDOZ? Where is Zed? I don’t see any grain slaves.
FY Amazon. Bullshit changing the terms on an annual service midway through and demanding an extra $3 for what you already promised. Take it up at renewal, assholes.
..and after a big recent-ish increase to the base Prime charge. They’re working very hard on chasing customers away.
My free “two day” shipping is more generously described as free 4-5 day shipping.
That’s the joy of living in NoDak, we get stuff timely here in the commonwealth.
My stuff gets here a day and a half earlier than when I lived in NYC – every time. It’s kind of neat.
Last Friday of the year!
Get up and celebrate. 🌄👀☕
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BXkm6h6uq0k
🎶🎶
Great song to get you moving this morning.
Morning, Sean
Mornin’
I got my house in Megaton last night.
🥳
Good morning, Sean, U, Ted’S,, and R.J.! (Hope you’re feeling better, R.J.!) (And good morning to Beau, wherever you are!)
Holiday carry-in at work gave me my annual excuse to go buy the big, frozen 14-different-flavor cheesecake! 😁
Morning GT et. al. I’m around, lurking mostly. The inter-holiday week is a down time for me in pretty much every way ;-\
I’d love to be posting more music but the stuff I’m after just isn’t out there on YouTube or elsewhere. Sigh.
(upbeat indie rock music)
👍
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=149Fln0DtUc
LOL, news just ran a PSA segment advising people to not shoot their guns into the air for New Years.
😂😂
Armor your roof, just in case.
I didn’t know you lived in Philly.
That’s more “at each other”.
Since I’m only intermittently around in the Mourning Lynx:
Sports news of the day, and a Daily Ray of Sunshine.
Good job, keep it cute and simple although I do wonder how this will help the LGBTQIA+ Poptart community.
It’s a nice 44 degrees out and lightly raining.
Might actually be a good day.
I hope it is. I have a big stack of resumes to read through, and hopefully just that.
37 degrees and cloudy here in SW OH, with one little rain/snow blob on the radar map, currently in the next county to the west.
Morning All !
Finally getting a little cool down but still not bad. No snow in the forecast for another 10 days at least and no snow on the ground at all. I’m loving the Climate Change.
Al G and Greta can kiss my bad ankle.
Good morning, 4(20)!
Sounds a bit dreary, England must be your weather Promised Land.
You misspelled “Cheery and soothing”
As for England – Twice I’ve been there and twice it was sunny and clear the whole week – dreadful.
Last time I was in London, there was a heat wave. The Thames stinks to high heaven when that happens, and the whole city has no AC.
My experience with London went like –
Landed a Heathrow, cleared customs, got on an underground train to St Pancras, caught an aboveground train to Nottingham.
Arrived back from Nottingham at St. Pancras, got on an underground train to Heathrow, went through security, boarded a plane.
Rinse and repeat the year after.
Though when I was there, the Nottingham Belfry was a nice hotel. It’s been bought out since, so I don’t know if the new management has maintained standards.
London is pretty awesome, if you have money. I guess most world class cities are that way though.
Borough bridge market 4-evah!
I was there for a Warhammer convention. Games Workshop is headquartered in Nottingham.
From what I’ve seen of other “world class cities” I’d probably hate London. Too crowded, too many people, too much.
I was first there in 1987. I was asked for change by a guy that could have been cast from “stereotypical urban homeless services LLC”… except that he spoke like Allister Cooke.
There were several dozen of us, all high schoolers, running around completely unsupervised in a place that serves alcohol to everyone. Not only was nobody killed nor hospitalized, nobody was even arrested.
The place has changed considerably since then, but I don’t know that 1987 NYC would have been so merciful.
In 1987 NYC, the guy asking for change would have clubbed you over the head, gutted you, and sold your shoes for crack money.
Mornin’, reprobates!
Mornin”, UCS.
Good morning, ‘patzie!
Morning.
Still feeling well?
46°, drizzly and foggy. Weather’s not too bad, either.
One cuppa down, fire in the wood furnace, all is well in Podunkville. At least until I watch the news.
Then don’t watch the news.
Problem solved.
Mornin’. Have you heard the news?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XDFonbSHSTM
Oh boy?
Morning all. Half day for me but got some work to do. Put on some headphones and go out to the radar site.
Mother of the year kicks off her 2028 presidential campaign?
https://nypost.com/2023/12/29/news/ex-pennsylvania-gop-lt-gov-candidate-clarice-schillinger-punched-teen-in-the-face-report/
Clarice Schillinger, 36, allegedly punched a 16-year-old boy in the face three times during the Sep. 29 party that ran past midnight and was charged about a month later with simple assault, harassment and providing alcohol to minors, according to a police affidavit unveiled by the Bucks County Courier Times Thursday.
Hannibal Lecter was unavailable for comment.
I’d wager he was still bigger than her.
Either way, is there any indication of why violence broke out? It is a comfortably small number of people who are prone to punching others out of the blue.
I want more context so I can decide who was in the wrong.
Sounds like drunken adults with lippy kids.
At the point in the article where the headline woman actually got violent, the teens had simply gathered at the door to leave. There is no indication of provocation from the test provided.
In fact, it wounds like the teens were better behaved with the alcohol than the adults.
Yep. Parents threw party and parents/adults acted like they were reliving their 20s.
The article doesn’t really address the main question:
Did the little punk have it coming?
Objection, assumes facts not in evidence.
We do not know if the punchee was in fact either little or a punk.
16 year old male. Call it a rebuttable presumption.
You met my son when he was 16 eh?
There was a time when I knew a lot of (other) 16 year old males.
Having been one – I disagree with that assertion.
It is less about being one, and more about raising one.
Your biased stance is noted, and too prejudicial to be applied to a third party.
Would.
Would..but you’d wake up probably after she choked you out during sex.
Colorado’s SoS initial removal of Trump (well, not really but we said it!) is one thing, it at least went to court even if flawed on the ruling.
Maine’s SoS just decided she had the power.
The play is just proclaim he engaged in insurrection and the lapdog press will dutifully spread the lie.
In that case, I declare her to be a traitor, removed from office, and all her rulings overturned.
That is how the game is played by her new rules, right?
Just made up shit to justify it.
This is more dangerous to the electoral system than the nonsensical “fake electors” ploy they are going after.
DEMOCRATSY must be preserved!!!
It’s amazing the superpowers they imbue him with.
How long ’till Texas and Florida drop Biden?
I’m wondering if we’ll wind up with two Presidents, like the Catholic Church had two Popes for awhile.
Eastern and Western?
Rome and Avignon.
But during the same crisis of antipopes, they actually got up to three when a compromise pope was elected and neither of the first two stepped down.
For funsies, it should be North and South again.
Pope Urban and Pope Ruritania?
Pope Jimbo!
“just proclaim he engaged in insurrection”
That’s exactly what the CO courts did. No evidentiary hearing, no trial, just deem it so.
Nuh uh! The BIPARTISAN J6 Committee is the dueyist due process that ever duly processed!
It’s getting kinda hectic.