This is like that episode of the Simpsons where the robots screamed when you took their faces off for maintenance.

This is my review of Paperback Brewing Capiche Italian Style Pilsner:

A company in Japan announced they successfully grew human skin that could be grafted onto robots. This compound like real skin even has the ability to heal itself:

As detailed in a study published on June 25 in Cell Reports Physical Science, engineers at the University of Tokyo have developed a method to adhere bioengineered skin grown from human cells onto any surface shape. Existing approaches often rely on miniature anchors and hooks to attach similar tissues to surfaces, which limit their utility and make them easily susceptible to damage during movement.

In this case, however, researchers created miniature V-shaped perforations in their lab-grown skin to make it extremely flexible, then applied a collagen gel. While the gel’s viscosity normally would prevent it from seeping into the tiny incisions, the engineers used what’s known as a water-vapor-based plasma treatment that is usually employed during plastic adhesion processes. This made the skin more hydrophilic, allowing the collagen to seep into the performations and bind the skin to its underlying surface much like ligaments.

Yes, it looks exactly as freaky as you want it to look. I get why they might have to fashion eye holes when growing these, but why put eyeballs behind for this step?

Anyways, there are a lot of conspiracies going around since the CIA mentioned how good they are at making masks. Some of these are pretty freaky so it doesn’t seem like much of a stretch to think someone in these clandestine alphabet agencies figured out how to get rid of an inconvenient politician somewhere and put in a body double.

Take that lady from Italy for example. When Georgina Meloni got elected there was a bit of a freakout by the press. As you may recall, this lady thinks only women can be women, and is therefore practically Mussolini. Can’t be a literal Nazi when they have their own version right? Turns out she’s not nearly crazy as they thought. Maybe their fears were overblown? I don’t think so. She was captured, and replaced with a Meloni doppelgänger who’s politics fall more in line with garden variety EU-Atlanticism. Otherwise how else do you explain this photo? Unless you want to argue Sunak accidentally activated her buttplug.


I don’t think the beer bros run out of ideas, but they’re approaching the asymptote. While the first thing people think of when one mentions Italy isn’t beer, Italians do in fact drink beer. The trouble is, it’s not exactly their thing like it is with the Germans so it tends to be “meh.” Of course, many Italian restaurants and pizza joints will cary Birra Moretti and Peroni since beer snobs like drinking beer from Italy while they’re gobbling down Americanized versions of classic Italian dishes. I am not here to judge those people, its cool. It really is. This isn’t bad though and I’m not just saying that because the Goomas are gonna put the squeeze to me if I don’t. Whatever it was they were looking to mimic, they nailed it. Paperback Brewing Capiche Italian Style Pilsner: 2.8/5

About The Author

mexican sharpshooter

mexican sharpshooter

WARNING: Glibertarians.com contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm. https://youtu.be/qiAyX9q4GIQ?t=2m22s

96 Comments

  1. Yusef drives a Kia

    Pilsner isn’t hard to make, a good cave helps though

    • Nephilium

      A well made one is quite difficult. Nothing to cover up any flaws in your brewing process, and it’s really easy to wind up with too much diacetyl (tastes like butter).

      • Chafed

        In your opinion Neph, which European country brews the best Pilsners?

      • Ted S.

        Only Czechia makes Pilsners.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        A well made one is quite difficult.

        Indeed. This is why I pick this style to judge the brewer. If its wrong, you know it,

      • Chafed

        Thanks.

      • Nephilium

        Chafed:

        It would depend on the flavor profile you most prefer. I enjoy nearly all of them, but as Ted’s comes close to, the Czechs did invent the style. The Belgian ones would be the most non-standard (as are most things in Belgian beers). But outside of lambics and gueuzes, I can probably find an American beer that can hold its own against any European beer.

  2. rhywun

    “Moisturize me. Moisturize me!!”

    • Gender Traitor

      😄 I’m ashamed I didn’t think of that myself! ::salutes rhy::

      • rhywun

        👍

    • Sean

    • Tres Cool

      + Cassandra

  3. Ownbestenemy

    Sipping some beer, tending the smoker to right temp to hot smoke 9lbs of pork belly that will soon be bacon.

    Country Fair tonight to watch monster trucks crush things for no other reason it is the most American thing.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Country Fair here is… a bit different.

      • Ownbestenemy

        4 days of beauty pagents is interesting.

    • Nephilium

      You’re going to the County Fair?

  4. The Late P Brooks

    Sunak accidentally activated her buttplug.

    You people…

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Looks like Catherine O’Hara there.

    • Chafed

      It does explain the look.

    • R C Dean

      Damn, that was just perfect.

      • mikey

        Accidentally?

  5. Toxteth O'Grady

    I found Peroni good with pesto.

  6. Mojeaux

    @groatscotum … I call my own mind cluttered. It’s why I have a vomit book to trash all that clutter via ink and paper. One day I was in such a state that I just wrote “anger” over and over again mixed in with random shit for like 3 pages. I did that until my brain felt empty again. I wasn’t any less angry about the root problem once I ran out of steam, but at least I was able to get on with my day.

    I declutter my brain the same way I purged my kids’ rooms. I started at the door, looked to the right, and started clearing out the trash first in a counterclockwise direction. Once that was done, I sorted like with like. I put the things away that had homes. Then I tried to find homes for the rest of it. I usually don’t finish all the way, but it’s enough to hold me steady for a while.

    Also, drugs.

    • R C Dean

      “Also, drugs.”

      *insert chef’s kiss emoji”

  7. DEG

    This isn’t bad though and I’m not just saying that because the Goomas are gonna put the squeeze to me if I don’t. Whatever it was they were looking to mimic, they nailed it. Paperback Brewing Capiche Italian Style Pilsner: 2.8/5

    Heh.

    I’ve had Peroni and Birra Moretti. They’re OK at best.

    • Nephilium

      There’s a couple of local breweries that have some Italian pilsners, they’re not bad for a change of pace.

  8. Yusef drives a Kia

    Peroni tastes like dirt,
    Same as Corona, hell they need a lemon to make it bearable

    • mexican sharpshooter

      I normally go with a lime for Corona, but you do you.

  9. JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

    The CEO of my company met with Meloni a couple months ago. He seemed rather smitten with her. I think he had been drinking.

    • Winston's Mom

      He activate her buttplug?

  10. The Late P Brooks

    Country Fair tonight to watch monster trucks crush things for no other reason it is the most American thing.

    Muh traktur pollz!

    • Beau Knott

      Combine harvester demolition derby! here

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Suddenly, I am no longer interested in Darkman.

  11. Nephilium

    See, now when I hear about things like this fake skin, this is the movie I think of.

      • Nephilium

        Fair. It’s been a while since I’ve seen that one though.

      • Chafed

        Both are good choices. I’m surprised no one brought up Terminator, Face/Off *spits*, or the Cylons.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Ooooh, Darkman.

        *checks streaming services*

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Damnit, can only find it on AMC+

  12. CPRM

    That ‘spy’ make-up looks like college Theatre Freshman work, not close to what the pros can do.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Better late than never, I suppose.

    • Gustave Lytton

      But we finally beat Medicare! Libertarian moment!

  13. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Are we sure she wasn’t overcome by Sunak’s animal magnetism to the point that she dropped an orgasm as soon as he touched her or maybe she’s turned on by body odor that’s influenced by a diet that’s high in curry. Aside from all that, there’s just something about Peroni for me. Definitely my favorite beer.

  14. creech

    Biden camp is in the “he just had a bad night” mode. Maybe it is time to resurrect the Hillary question about whom you want answering the hot line at 3am? “Nuclear attack on Israel, you say? Joe’s asleep; call back later when we can rouse and medicate him”….Dr. Jill.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Ain’t nobody buying the he just had a bad night shit, even those who still back him. He’s lucky he’s not being twentyfifthed after that debacle.

      • R C Dean

        *Kamala has entered the chat*

      • Nephilium

        I did see a headline that House Republicans are “pouncing” on the debate to attempt to force the cabinet to invoke the 25th.

      • R C Dean

        “From 10am to 4pm, Biden is dependably engaged”

        AYFKM?

      • Sensei

        They didn’t mention the sleepy-time after lunch.

        Guy is stoic!

  15. EvilSheldon

    I just made an espresso martini with tequila blanco instead of vodka. It’s good. But now that it doesn’t have a single ingredient in common with a real Martini, it needs a new name. Any ideas?

    • Suthenboy

      The Theseus?

    • Timeloose

      Colombian Necktie?

      • R C Dean

        I think we have a winner. What’s your recipe, Evil?

      • EvilSheldon

        I love it! Colombian Necktie it is!

        The recipe –
        2oz. Tequila Blanco. Use something good enough to sip; my go-to is Siete Leguas.
        1/2oz. Kahula or other coffee liqueur.
        1oz. fresh Espresso or cold-brew coffee concentrate.
        Simple syrup to taste – start with 1/4oz. and adjust as necessary.

        If you have an espresso machine, pull a short 1oz. shot and stick it in the freezer to cool down while you build the rest of the cocktail.

        Add all ingredients to a cocktail shaker, shake with ice and strain into a chilled coupe glass. Garnish with a twist of orange peel and three espresso beans.

      • Timeloose

        Good recipe. My wife makes a similar one with Vodka.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      The Capo?

      • R C Dean

        Too Sicilian.

    • Nephilium

      It already didn’t have anything in common with a real Martini. 🙂

      • EvilSheldon

        Lately I’ve been trying to be more tolerant of the disgusting degenerates who make martinis with vodka instead of gin…

      • Sean

        On the rare occasion I go out to eat, a vodka martini is my goto – with Tito’s.

      • slumbrew

        Extra dirty Tito’s martini with my steak, please.

        Why, yes, I would like blue cheese stuffed olives with that.

  16. Sensei

    Nice business. Shame if anything were to happen to it.
    Asbury Park Restaurant Fined For Discriminating Against Nonbinary Customer, AG Says

    Investigators said Brando’s refused to serve the customer because staff believed they weren’t following the restaurant’s dress code, banning men from wearing sleeveless shirts while not having the same requirement for women.

    “Even though the patron had previously informed staff that they were non-binary, the restaurant insisted that the patron adhere to the restaurant’s rules for men’s clothing,” Platkin said in a statement.

    • R C Dean

      I’m surprised they weren’t tagged for having different dress codes for “men” and “women”.

      • Sean

        They need a biologist on staff.

    • Suthenboy

      I am a bit of a loss on this.

      50% of the fines went to the state.
      I asked a lawyer buddy once about speeding tickets: “If you lose in court you have to pay a fine which the court benefits from. Couldn’t one argue that the court is biased and you cant receive a fair hearing?”

      Answer: “I dont know. I dont think anyone has tried that before.”

    • rhywun

      Ponder the fact that crime fighting resources were wasted on this Orwellian bullshit.

      There are four lights, asshole.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    “Even though the patron had previously informed staff that they were non-binary, the restaurant insisted that the patron adhere to the restaurant’s rules for men’s clothing,” Platkin said in a statement.

    Back in the dark ages, I tended bar in a place with a sign at the entrance which said, “Management reserves the right to refuse anything to anyone.”

    Haha, what fools we were then.

    • Sensei

      Pole dancing.

    • Chafed

      No pics? I’m disappointed.

      • Ted S.

        Do you really want to see pictures of the sort of people who would do that?

      • Ted S.

        There was airplane porn for KK.

  18. UnCivilServant

    I saw a cybertruck in the wild today.

    Looks faker in reality than in photographs.

  19. Ted S.

    Needs more lightning.

  20. Chafed

    OK MS, who is that supposed to be on the beer can? It looks like a crazy mash up of Burt Reynolds and Marlon Brando.

      • rhywun

        The spelling capisce wrong is a nice touch. (Though to be fair, I have literally never seen a non-Italian spell that correctly.)

      • mexican sharpshooter

        I have ti get the name in the photo.

        *flips table*

    • mexican sharpshooter

      A generic Guido. Not sure if it’s supposed to be anyone in particular. Wouldn’t that run into copyright issues?

      • Ted S.

        Guido?

        Suave.

  21. Tres Cool

    So when I was in the middle of my commute last night, the Tracker Testarossa™ had a bit of a hiccup. I’d stopped to get gas. Filled up, went inside to take a whiz, and back out. Maybe 10 minutes. Started fine, pulled back out onto the road, and suddenly its misfiring like crazy. A distance of maybe 500′. I coast into a parking lot, restarted, and the same. Engine bucking, coughing, and misfiring. Gas pedal was largely unresponsive, but any revs I got only made it worse. Foot off the gas and she wouldnt idle- just died.
    No check engine light. Stated it back up a few more times, same result. My immediate thought was that since Id just filled up, I had water in the tank. But since it would start and briefly run roughly, it really seemed like it was WAY out of timing. Luckily it has a chain, not belt. But it is 24 years old.
    Just for fun, I disconnected the MAF sensor, started and she rev’d freely like nothing ever happened. Reconnected the sensor and it idled fine. Crossed myself, crossed my fingers, and hopped back on the interstate where the rest of the journey was uneventful.
    Any thoughts?

    *2.0L I-4 suzuki

    • Ted S.

      Not a gearhead, so I can’t help you.

      I blame SEDAN SMITH.

      • Tres Cool

        Its japanese.

        SUZUKI SMITH

    • Sean

      Run some Techron through it.

      • Tres Cool

        Every other tank its treated to royal purple fuel system cleaner.

    • R.J.

      If you were really low on gas, putting fresh gas in could introduce air bubbles and cause odd stalling and even misfire. Especially if the car stays on while you fill it. That could be what happened. That it cleared up when you disconnected and reconnected the MAF sensor could have been entirely coincidental.

      • Tres Cool

        I do believe it was a coincidence. The tank was likely at 1/3 or 1/4. Im not the person that tries to test the gauge when I get to E.
        I went ahead and got a crank and cam position sensor. AC/Delco parts, and Im likely throwing good money after bad. But everything on it is stock, so it cant hurt to put some fresh pieces on.

        Either way Id planned on taking the Challenger tomorrow since we have a short week. And I have no tests.

  22. Derpetologist

    Lindsey Graham said the quiet part out loud:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJ6UCHCmPPo

    ***
    It was never about saving Ukraine from Russia, it’s about 12 trillion in resources.
    ***

    • Suthenboy

      Where is all of the oil Shrub promised us from Central Asia once we got Afghanistan in line?
      Horseshit.
      It is about laundering US taxpayer dollars, that is all.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Just for fun, I disconnected the MAF sensor, started and she rev’d freely like nothing ever happened. Reconnected the sensor and it idled fine. Crossed myself, crossed my fingers, and hopped back on the interstate where the rest of the journey was uneventful.
    Any thoughts?

    It’s haunted.

    My first guess was bad gas, but apparently not. Who knows with this shit? I’m still chasing the mysterious intermittent crank-no-start issue on the Honda. It was gone, but it has reappeared a couple of times recently. My new hypothesis is the connector to the main relay. Meaning I’ll try to tighten the contacts without breaking them.

  24. Sean

    I’ve got 7 lbs of porterhouses to grill tomorrow.

    • Tres Cool

      Its raining here, so my grill plans went to shit. I just made beef stew with 2 lbs of ribeye.
      Its really good.