IFLA: The “Backasswards” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of Aug 18

by | Aug 18, 2024 | IFLA | 87 comments

This week gets the brunt of MERCURY RETROGRADE. It’s going to pass between the Earth and the Sun starting… well a few hours ago actually. And it’ll keep that alignment until Tuesday… when it gets worse with the Moon joining in for a bit of a sack tap. Fortunately it starts breaking up the very next day, but you only get at bit of a break since MERCURY RETROGRADE aligns with Saturn retrograde on Friday. Will this be worse than today? Hmmm, probably not, but it will be a different flavor of whatthefuckery.

What else we got? Well, there’s a Mars-Jupiter conjunction in Gemini, that’s not a particularly good sign. Could be the beginning of a war, could be the ending of a war (lol, right) could be a new mobilization for a pre-existing war, most often this is associated with a coup/rebellion. Maybe we’ll get lucky. I wouldn’t rely on that though. The best sign this week is in fact Virgo, since it’s got Venus while Leo has to deal with MERCURY RETROGRADE. There will be a singular day of “wow, that’s pretty nice actually” coming up for the leonine ones next week, but that will be not this week.

Leo: Strength reversed – Despotism, abuse of power, weakness, discord, disgrace. Told you Leo is going to have shit to deal with this week.

Virgo: King of Coins reversed – You know how money is the root of all evil? This week is a more up close and personal experience of that.

Libra: Ace of Swords reversed – This is a coin of force gone terribly wrong. Enjoy!

Scorpio: 10 of Swords – This is a card that doesn’t need to be reversed to be awful. Classically it means pain, affliction, tears, sadness, desolation. It also foretells being hurt when you’re already weakened.

Sagittarius: 6 of Coins reversed – A good deed being punished, or a more specific meaning of being swindled by a “charity.”

Capricorn: 8 of Swords – That this is the best card drawn so far it pretty horrifying. Bad news, violent chagrin, crisis, censure, power in trammels, conflict, calumny, sickness.

Aquarius: Ace of Wands reversed – Fall, decadence, ruin, perdition, impotence, some bad shit happening to you that is/was caused by a parent or ancestor.

Pisces: Knight of Cups reversed – Trickery, artifice, subtlety, swindling, duplicity, fraud.

Aries: 8 of Wands – Rapid progress, hope, speed, love.

Taurus: The World reversed – Inertia, fixity, stagnation, permanence.

Gemini: 2 of Swords – Conformity, balance that can’t be disturbed without ruin, inevitability, vengeance.

Cancer: The Hanged Man – Wisdom, circumspection, discernment, trials, sacrifice, intuition, divination, prophecy. 

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

87 Comments

  1. Suthenboy

    ” This is a card that doesn’t need to be reversed to be awful.”

    Thanks.

  2. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: 6 of Coins reversed – A good deed being punished, or a more specific meaning of being swindled by a “charity.”

    Poisoned at the soup kitchen.

  3. Sean

    “Cancer: The Hanged Man – Wisdom, circumspection, discernment, trials, sacrifice, intuition, divination, prophecy. ”

    *squints real hard*

    Yeah, I think that means I’m getting laid.

    • Suthenboy

      That’s what I always think.

  4. kinnath
    • Don escaped Texas

      P90 for the win

  5. DEG

    Despotism, abuse of power, weakness, discord, disgrace. Told you Leo is going to have shit to deal with this week.

    Sufficiently shitty.

  6. creech

    Virgo king of coins reversed. Hey, thanks. My tooth implant broke about an hour ago. Goodbye about $2 grand. And it is a front tooth so I can walk around looking like one of Vance’s hillbillies for a couple weeks.

    • Ted S.

      Hawt.

      • cyto

        Hawt tootha?

    • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

      I just read about something called ‘excess household savings’.

      As in, ‘excess household savings are decreasing.’.

      I don’t know about you, but I’ve never had savings I felt were excess.

      • Suthenboy

        If you were talking down to serfs, serfs you wanted to remain as serfs, how would you talk to them differently?
        They deliberately drove up prices and are now complaining about ‘excess’ savings.
        Prosperity gives people options. Serfs dont have options so they are destroying prosperity.

        That is how that works. These people are evil.

  7. Rebel Scum

    Fall, decadence, ruin, perdition

    Should be a fun week.

    • The Wrath of ZWAAAAAAKKKK!!!

      So, I got that going for me. Which is nice.

  8. cyto

    This sounds like one of us:

    https://x.com/beinlibertarian/status/1825201697720844730?s=19

    I wore my Kamala – Walz shirt to church today where several of the members are MAGA. As we were greeting one another people started complimenting my shirt. The pastor came up to me, shook my hand, and then froze. He said, “Hold on. I have to do this…” He got up front and told everyone that he and the entire church should do the right thing and vote for Kamala just like I am. He pointed to my shirt and everyone cheered. After church we had a bonfire where everyone threw their MAGA gear into it. Never give up!

    • Don escaped Texas

      @iammarklynch I love all the dnc fanfic online right now.

      here’s an incredibly reasonable discussion about the choices: https://reason.com/podcast/2024/08/16/is-donald-trump-the-best-choice/

      my only critique is that Laffer makes the same academic inferences about the price of oil that everyone does; it’s too late for him to learn a bit of Austrian and start looking at the data instead of wishing and asserting that oil obeys his theories

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        ‘incredibly reasonable ‘

        Drink!

    • Drake

      When I see this kind of nonsense, I wonder if this is an AI bot account or somebody just making it up.

      • Mojeaux

        Sardonic tweet is sardonic.

    • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

      It’s a joke, y’all. Chill

    • Rebel Scum

      Can’t tell if serious.

      • cyto

        I laughed. Pretty epic parody.

        And it is indeed too close to what the paid accounts have been posting

      • The Other Kevin

        Pretty good, just missing a four year old asking daddy why people are against using price caps to fight corporate greed.

      • Gdragon

        Same account posted this , that should clear things up. I laughed at both.

    • Suthenboy

      I have been assured by cnn, msnbc, etc that Kamala is a shoe-in. Trump has given up and is no longer campaigning, he knows he is beat.
      In other news Hillary Clinton has a 97% chance of beating Trump day after tomorrow.

      In other helpful news: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WbnLbkOMS8

      • Suthenboy

        Oh God. I linked to that without watching all of it. Priceless.
        “Your wings will be secret. They will be invisible. Well, ok so basically you wont have wings but you can still fly.”
        “…You will need white fairy dust which is just like regular fairy dust but with white sparkles.”
        I am torn between sadness and laughter.

        “I dont know how to explain it I am not a scientist.”

      • Gdragon

        “White rice only!”

        “Luckily you only have to say it twice!”. I mean, is saying it a couple more times significantly more difficult?

        This video is 9 years old, has she been flying above us for that long? I guess we’ve been too busy “sciencing” to notice LOL. Thanks for the laugh Suthen.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    After church we had a bonfire where everyone threw their MAGA gear into it. Never give up!

    Praise JESUS!

    • Sean

      The guy trimming the hedges?

      • Aloysious

        My grandma, on occasion, would say to us kids, “I just don’t understand why they have to name themselves after our Lord.”

        She was a good FDR voting Prohibitionist.

        Life can be strange.

  10. Gustave Lytton

    From the ded thred

    In a picture taken of the meeting, Harris is holding the letters in her hand, leaning forward on a sofa. She’s in her West Wing office, down the hall from the Oval, nearly 3,000 miles from that school bus she boarded in the hope that Black children would get the same opportunities as white kids.
    “Can you believe this?” Brokaw said to her. “Here you are in your West Wing office! That’s pretty cool, isn’t it?”

    Uh, the VP’s office is in the Old Executive Office Building.

  11. Sean

    Well, storms held off for lunchtime steaks. Let’s see if I get lucky for dinnertime too.

  12. Mojeaux

    Taurus: The World reversed – Inertia, fixity, stagnation, permanence.

    My life is pretty damned good right now, so yeah, I’ll take that.

    Inertia is a helluva drug.

  13. KK, Plump & Unfiltered

    My gentleman caller’s and my horrorscopes are opposite 😬

    • UnCivilServant

      Well, it is just a bit of fiction.

    • cyto

      Brilliant

  14. The Late P Brooks

    Shocking

    Recently, California alone saw a net outflow of 24,670 high-earners who had an average adjusted gross income (AGI) of $1.3 million. Meanwhile, in New York, there was a net outflow of 12,040 high-earners, with those movers reporting an average AGI of $1.1 million.

    However, the states where these wealthy Americans are moving to have affordable housing and lower taxes, highlighting how the cost of living is a top priority even for the richest Americans.

    “However”?

    Yes, folks, people are moving away from California and New York despite the lower cost of living in other states.

    • Suthenboy

      See my comments above, especially the one on being a secret fairy.

  15. Mojeaux

    If @OMWC’s current FWB gets through meeting WebDom and l0b0t, then Sugarfree, we should call her Survivor.

    • Gdragon

      I can’t believe I missed that entire discussion!

      “Pharmattorney” is the first thing that popped in my head but I can definitely come up with something better.

      • R C Dean

        I’m liking C-Sweetie, with Freeda Womb* running second.

        *IUD mascot name, IUD – medical device, plus its got that Womb to Tomb callback to his old squeeze.

      • Mojeaux

        I think C-Sweetie is awesome!

  16. cyto

    It’s funny that Reagan is what counted as “dumb” for a political figure in the 70s and 80s.

    Who is our current intellectual giant? Obama?

    Imagine Obama trying to keep up with Reagan.

    What the hell happened?

    • Tundra

      “Welcome to Costco. I love you.”

    • Gdragon

      “Who is our current intellectual giant?”

      ——

      I’m not on TikTok so obviously I don’t have the answer LOL.

      • Suthenboy

        “I’m not on TikTok so obviously I dont have the answer.”

        I am stealing that for….well just about everything.

    • Don escaped Texas

      George Will
      Yuval Levin
      Ron Paul
      Ramesh Ponnuru
      Richard Brookhiser
      Neil Gorsuch
      Jonah Goldberg
      Thomas Massie

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        I saw an interview with Gorsuch, he’s pretty damn sharp.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    Terrifying

    The images still carry telltale signs of AI generation like garbled text and unnatural lighting. In addition, the image generator struggled to accurately render Harris’s face. But the rollout of X’s tool with relatively few restrictions on the types of images it can create raises worries about how it could be used to inflame tensions ahead of November’s presidential election. (NPR is not reproducing the image appearing to depict Trump and Harris holding weapons.)

    “Why on earth would somebody roll something out like this? Precisely two and a half months before an incredibly major election?” said Eddie Perez, a former information integrity director at Twitter and now a board member at the OSET Institute, a nonpartisan nonprofit that focuses on public confidence in elections.

    “I’m very uncomfortable with the fact that technology that is this powerful, that appears this untested, that has this few guardrails on it – it’s just being dropped into the hands of the public at such an important time.” Perez said.

    OH

    MY

    GOD!

    • The Other Kevin

      People were never able to lie or deceive each other in the past. That just happened recently.

      • Sean

        That Trump baby…

        I’m ded.

    • Suthenboy

      “I’m very uncomfortable with the fact that technology that is this powerful….. is being dropped into the hands of the public.”

      Good. You lot having control of the narrative is how we got where we are now motherfucker.

  18. The Other Kevin

    Today is middle kid’s birthday. This is the one who isn’t talking to us. So we have a bit of a cloud hanging over the house today. Thursday is Mrs. TOK’s birthday. I hope she makes it through all these crazy planetary things unscathed.

    • Tundra

      Happy birthday to both of them. My birthday wish for each of them is that this goes away and next year they can celebrate together.

      • The Other Kevin

        That’s a great wish. Thanks! Didn’t you just have a birthday? Happy belated if I missed it.

        So many Leo’s in my life. But apparently Sagittarius (my sign) is the only one that can tame these beasts.

      • Tundra

        Thanks! Yes a couple weeks ago.

        Just happy to be here lol

    • Gender Traitor

      ::virtually hugs TOK & Mrs. TOK::

      ::virtually paddles middle kid’s butt the appropriate number of times + one to grow up on::

      • The Other Kevin

        Let’s add a virtual paddle up side the head of middle kid’s possessive and mentally abusive boyfriend.

      • Gdragon

        Oh boy that definitely doesn’t sound fun TOK. I feel like those situations do in fact work themselves out in the end more often than not but they can be really awful in the meantime (and obviously even worse if they don’t work themselves out). Best of luck and happy birthday to all!

    • Mojeaux

      Sorry for you and Mrs. TOK. I shouldn’t speak so freely about your situation, BUT!

      We were in the dark with XY for so long and we didn’t think it would ever end, but it did. Things are fine now. That’s not to say they won’t go sideways in the future, but I doubt all is lost with your XX. It takes a constitution of iron to love and support a kid through their idiocies.

      • The Other Kevin

        Of course you can speak freely about this. I wouldn’t put it out there if I didn’t want input. And you’ve always got something helpful to say.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    Come to think of it, an image of Harris wearing a Che shirt and brandishing an AK-47 isn’t all that far fetched.

    • Don escaped Texas

      I don’t doubt that she can operate a tee shirt

    • Pine_Tree

      Dunno about an AK, but how ’bout a Colt .45?

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

        And two zig zags?

  20. Gustave Lytton

    Noon post or no this week?

    • Gender Traitor

      Looks like 4 Central (server time?) so 2 Pacific.

  21. Aloysious

    Nice Ass.

    • Evan from Evansville

      Don’t I know it.

    • Suthenboy

      She gets it.

  22. The Other Kevin

    The current viral thing is that Kamala is drunk. She’s avoiding interviews, press conferences, and… breathalyzers? This could get entertaining.

    • DEG

      The Democrat factional infighting is not over.

      With Antifa heading to Chicago for the DNC, I expect the next week will be spicy.

      • Sean

        I hope so.

      • creech

        Nah. Will be a triumphal tongue bath for Kommiela and King. They have Trump on the ropes and they know it.

    • Suthenboy

      I have seen her drunk many times. I have no doubt she has a problem. I think her record is wha tis keeping her under a rock.

  23. Evan from Evansville

    I texted my soon-to-be boss and nothin’ yet, so I kinda assume I have no work tomorrow. I’ll still wake up early and be alert. Tempted to pop in but I do know that is not in anyone’s best interest.

    Taurus: The World reversed – Inertia, fixity, stagnation, permanence. : Hrm. Evan strongly approves of this, as long as I’m 2-for-4 as bookends and (at least?) good at-bats in the middle. (The ones ya don’t want to show off.) Knave’s insane idea, miraculously with Nicole’s approval and all professionals I’ve spoken to… somehow turned out to be a remarkable one?

    ‘Tis indeed fun to navigate these (oddly foreign) domestic lands. I’d like to thank all zoomers last eve for (politely) slapping me in the face, externally showing me off-putting I can be. Much more perilously-playful Short Fry Evan is about to dive into a new realm. Best example I can think of, hands-down, my impulse to hop to Korea, 6 mo after graduating IU. Spawned a decade of intrigue! This’ll likely be the same, but… more tumescent in its opportunities to expand.

    On-deck purgatory is about to end! Inertia’s a helluva drug. (Me want more.)

    • R.J.

      May you have more work than you can handle in the future. I am rooting for you.

  24. Shpip

    Well, this is interesting.

    Not exactly the metric that I’d be using (I prefer assets under management), but it’s something.

    Here’s hoping that trend accelerates.

    • R.J.

      Yee Haw and all that.

    • R C Dean

      Or they could just be bringing their NPCs and money/influence to TX, which could meant it gets pushed to the left. There’s already at least two, maybe four, urban areas that have been captured by the left in TX. At some point, leftist urban vote factories control the state. See, e.g., AZ.