Monday Afternoon Clean Up Links

by | Sep 9, 2024 | I Am Lame | 107 comments

OK, STEVE SMITH trashed the place, and we have to clean up.

So much for taking a day off. Try to relax on Labor Day and STEVE SMITH trashed my office – and stole my last bottle of kirschwasser. I’d like to say I won’t let that happen again, but Veteran’s Day is on a Monday this year. But, cryptids aside, you are here for links.

And here they are.

Music. It’s old.

Comment section is open and all yours. Now where is that HAZMAT suit…?

About The Author

Swiss Servator

Swiss Servator

Currently serving at the pleasure of a Swiss multinational. Previously a Soldier, rugby player, lawyer, bouncer, bartender, substitute teacher, risk manager, and cubicle mushroom. Will work for raclette.

107 Comments

    • Ted S.

      I was expecting this.

      • Tundra

        Hawt.

        Awful, but hawt.

  1. Shpip

    “Since around 9 a.m. [Thursday], balloons have been launched again, so I emphasized to the public that they should be careful of falling loads, and if they see a fallen balloon, do not come into contact with it,” Lee said.

    He added that around 20 balloons carrying paper and plastic bottles fell in Seoul and the surrounding Gyeonggi Province, with no hazardous substances detected.

    Fill ’em up with kimchi and watch that change immediately.

    • The Other Kevin

      99 Scheiße Balloons

      • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

        😂

      • Tonio

        [golf clap]

        And I haven’t even read down, yet.

      • Tundra

        Bravo.

    • Timeloose

      The South Koreans should send the North their own garbage to show how much better they are eating.

  2. Shpip

    I’m wondering if the missing signatures is in any way related to this.

    Commercial signature collectors are alleged to have forged signatures on a large scale in Switzerland. Around a dozen popular initiatives, which require at least 100,000 signatures to be validated, are suspected of having been put before voters thanks to forged signatures.

    The Federal Chancellery says so far there is no evidence that initiatives built on forged signatures went to the ballot box. But can this reassurance be trusted?

    One in three signatures or identities on the collection forms for people’s initiatives turned out to be forged in commercial collections, Marc Wilmes, who checks signatures for a living, told Swiss public television, SRF. Wilmes adds that municipalities can check addresses and dates of birth, but not signatures.

    • rhywun

      the city’s minimum wage initiative

      Just Say No.

      I thought Switzerland was crazy expensive – why do they want to make it even more so?

      • Suthenboy

        Because thieves know no bounds? They always want more.

    • creech

      One in three isn’t surprising. Some LP petition drives have hit 1 in 2. Paying up to $5 per signature is a sure invitation to fraud.

  3. OBJ FRANKELSON

    I suppose Koreans tossing garbage around is better than the seasonal crabbing wars, those tend to get a bit more kinetic.

    • Tundra

      Man, they really want him to win.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        I love Walter Kirn.

      • DrOtto

        His brother Pop Kirn was a bad dude.

    • kinnath

      Beautiful graphic and truer than magazine wants it to be.

    • Urthona

      I don’t get why people keep calling left wing women “wine moms” and “soccer moms”.

      actually, moms are republican.

      If you’d like to really kill the Democratic Party, start getting more women married with kids.

    • The Hyperbole

      I don’t get it.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Maybe you are hanging out at the wrong bars?

    • Suthenboy

      It doesnt occur to the general public that the kind of apocalyptic panic and foam at the mouth insanity we hear from the left about the end times via Trump has a very “She doth protest too much” vibe?
      This isn’t making any red flags pop up for any of them?

  4. Fourscore

    How can we trust Putin to interfere in the US election if he can’t even trust his own scientists? At least the CIA and USAID can be trusted to interfere all over the world. The results may vary but the MIC isn’t too interested in the outcome.

  5. Shpip

    Guy at Cars & Coffee yesterday: How do you keep your car so shiny?

    Me: Polish

    Guy: Oh — Jak utrzymujesz swój samochód w takim połysku?

    • Fourscore

      Took me a few seconds, then a guffaw.

    • Timeloose

      You better watch you dupa or Swiss will be sending Steve Smith.

    • UnCivilServant

      I’m sorry, I don’t speak foreign.

    • Nephilium

      Next you’ll bring up the Polish man who thought his wife was trying to get rid of him. He had found her bottle of polish remover.

    • Tundra

      Lol. Well done.

      Speaking of that, we were talking about car polish recently and I forgot to save reccos. You use ceramic, yes?

      Anyone else feel free to chime in, too.

      • Shpip

        About every two months I’ll finish off a maintenance wash with Meguiars spray-on hybrid ceramic coating. They say you can simply spray it on and “activate it” by spraying it off with water, but I’ve found that spreading it around with a damp microfiber works better (takes some time, though). I picked up a couple bottles for a song last year, so I haven’t run with the crowd to the new graphenes yet. Works a treat on wheels, too — the brake dust just hoses off.

        Every now and again, I’ll go old school and put on a coat of P21S Carnauba wax — again, just because I have it and am unwilling to toss it.

        The track car has stem-to-stern PPF, so it’ll get topped with Gtechniq Halo before hitting the circuits again this autumn.

      • R C Dean

        I can recommend the Klasse products. In fact, I have. If you do it by hand, they go on clean and easy.

      • Tundra

        Awesome. Thanks, boys.

  6. UnCivilServant

    Made it to Spokane.

    The parking tag for hotels guests have a warning about high levels of car thefts in spokane county. What’s the fastest way to find what geographic distrubtion the thefts are occuring in?

    • trshmnstr

      Rent 20 cars, leave them in various parts of the city.

      • UnCivilServant

        Too expensive, and slow. I just want to know how much I need to fret about where I’m at now.

      • SarumanTheGreat

        I never had quite the nerve (or an available shed integument when I wanted one) but I always thought wrapping a shed snakeskin around the steering wheel, stickshift, or other fairly visible apparatus one needs to operate the car with would be a fairly good deterrent to having it stolen.

        One reason I never did was if said ‘repurposer’ didn’t notice the snakeskin until they were on the road, it might lead to a crash and get my ass in a wringer.

        So I’ve always let my cars turn into a beaters with a lived-in look.

      • UnCivilServant

        My car is very boring, cluttered, and covered with road dust.

        It doesn’t quite look like a junker yet.

    • Fourscore

      Leave your keys in the ignition.

  7. Ted S.

    Anybody know a good keyboard app for Android? I updated my tablet, and the keyboard is constantly minimizing and drying to get me to turn on speech-to-text.

    • trshmnstr

      I use SwiftKey. Good, not great. I like the customization

      • Ted S.

        It’s a split keyboard, and I can’t find the setting to change that.

  8. The Late P Brooks

    Great song, which immediately put this in my head

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      Got yer 356 right there!

  9. The Other Kevin

    I can happily report that DEG is alive and well and on his way to this weekend’s HH. He stopped by my gym for some deadlifts, and thankfully didn’t injure himself playing with the strongman equipment.

    Meanwhile I was at the 45th Annual Popcorn Festival, watching parade floats made of popcorn in the pouring rain.

    • UnCivilServant

      You left him alone with heavy weights?

      • The Other Kevin

        It was ok, he signed a waiver.

    • Fourscore

      Early weather forecast looks favorable for HH. I’m getting the equipment cleaned up.

      • pistoffnick (370HSSV)

        I’m getting the equipment cleaned up.

        You kids and your euphemisms

  10. The Other Kevin

    Also this weekend, in one of my proudest moments as a father, my youngest kid video called me from the flight deck of the USS Nimitz.

  11. cyto

    Eric Berger talks about how NASA switched the Europa Clipper mission from SLS to Falcon Heavy.

    SLS had been mandated to show that the rocket had many uses…. but audits showed that the solid boosters would shake too violently for the delicate craft.

    Thread: https://x.com/SciGuySpace/status/1833236699096486362?s=19

    • cyto

      So, this launch will cost us $178 billion on SpaceX instead of $450 million for the defunct Atlas V or the scheduled $2 billion for SLS.

      • cyto

        Of course those numbers ignore the $1 billion per year “readiness” fee paid to have an atlas on hand.

        And it ignores the GAO audit that said SLS actually costs $4.5 billion per launch.

        Elon is such a grifter…..

  12. The Late P Brooks

    Next month the Atlantic should have Trump re-enacting Edison’s electrocution of Topsy the elephant on the cover.

  13. The Other Kevin

    RIP James Earl Jones.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      Oh man, that is a loss.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Totes, M’goats!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I rewatched Conan the other night and had forgotten he was in it. He was a hell of an actor. RIP.

    • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

      I didn’t know he was an EGOT!

      • Ted S.

        Only an honorary Oscar, I believe.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    I had one of those “Any second now, that idiot is going to look through her windshield and see me” moments a while ago. Parking lot; I was going across the “top of the tee” along the front of a grocery store, and this big white SUV was coming out of one of the parking rows at undiminshed speed. I had to take evasive action. She finally locked ’em up after I was already clear.

    • cyto

      Did she yell “asshole!” As she shot you a mean look?

      ‘Cause that would complete the scene

  15. The Late P Brooks

    RIP James Earl Jones.

    Bummer. I just caught part of Doctor Strangelove the other night.

    “Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.”

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Wrong guy, they do look alike though.

      • Urthona

        turgidson?

        jones was the bombardier. his first role I believe.

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Elon is such a grifter…..

    Putting him on a government efficiency commission would be a giant conflict of interest. He’d try to steer contracts to the low cost provider- himself.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I’m sure it’d be slanted to benefit himself but there’s so much waste/graft/unnecessary bullshit it’d almost have to end up being a net positive.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    Did she yell “asshole!” As she shot you a mean look?

    Her windows were rolled up. I’m sure she had the a/c cranked.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    Wrong guy, they do look alike though.

    Jones didn’t have any particularly memorable lines.

    “Major Kong! Major Kong!”

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Ground control to Major Kong?

  19. The Late P Brooks

    Put soft sticky foam all over them

    The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration is proposing new regulations for vehicle design intended to reduce the number of pedestrians killed and seriously injured in crashes on U.S. roads.

    As cars and trucks get bigger and taller, lawmakers look to protect pedestrians
    The proposal announced Monday comes as the number of annual pedestrian deaths is up more than 75% since reaching its lowest point in 2009.

    “We have a crisis of roadway deaths, and it’s even worse among vulnerable road users like pedestrians,” said Sophie Shulman, NHTSA’s deputy administrator, in a statement announcing the proposed regulation. “This proposed rule will ensure that vehicles will be designed to protect those inside and outside from serious injury or death.”

    Regulators say their proposal would establish new test procedures that simulate a head-to-hood impact, along with performance requirements to minimize the risk of head injury. The agency estimates that could save 67 lives each year.

    More regulations are what we need.

    • Tundra

      Cocksuckers put in regulations that incentivize vast vehicles with awful visibility and assume they can fix it by what – magic?

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Two blocks from my house, right in front of the hospital, they lollypopped the corners. So, now pedestrians hang out even farther into the street while they made turning through it more difficult.

        Morons.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Did they destroy 100+ year old concrete curbs with original pouring stamps for those? Every time I see the destruction, my blood pressure goes through the roof.

    • SarumanTheGreat

      Dumb fucks. Just ban cars and trucks! Especially the big scary ones that bring food and supplies to the 15-minute cities the Wokies are always pushing!

      Oh, wait . . .

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Oh they definitely are going to try to ban trucks with their big grills and toxic masculinity.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        They may take my life but they will never take my truck nutz!!

  20. The Late P Brooks

    Safety advocates have often criticized NHTSA for focusing solely on drivers and passengers inside cars — while failing to protect pedestrians and other road users on the outside. But some of the agency’s toughest critics praised its latest proposal, which would harmonize federal vehicle safety standards with global standards.

    That sounds… ominous.

    • Suthenboy

      No shit.

      This notion of globalization of everything is incredibly stupid. What kind of widows lickin’, booger eatin’ moron would think that has any chance of survival or result in anything but disaster?

  21. UnCivilServant

    I own a Buck Hunting knife I bought in late 2019 for a planned visit to try to take deer in Pennsylvania in December 2020… so it hasn’t yet been used for its intended purpose.

    I’m touring the Buck factory tomorrow, and through much of the road trip so far I’ve been thinking “I should have brought a pocket knife” at times when it would have been useful.

    How good are Buck’s folding pocket knives?

  22. The Late P Brooks

    How good are Buck’s folding pocket knives?

    Like a lot of things, they used to be good. Do they nave a company store? If you find one you like, buy it.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Dirty no account panderer

    Vice President Harris’s campaign called a social media post from former President Trump about Florida’s marijuana legalization ballot measure “blatant pandering” Monday.

    Kamala Harris would never, ever stoop to tailoring her answers to the audience.

    • Ownbestenemy

      During his 2016 presidential campaign, Trump said states should be free to legalize marijuana

      Her statements should have been laughed at and no media should have acknowledged it

      • Ownbestenemy

        Of course I am not blind to what Sessions did as AG…but laws are laws and Congress was all too happy to keep shit on the books.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    I was just looking at the Buck website. Some nice looking knives in the “classics”. A little spendy, for my tastes.

    • UnCivilServant

      My spending tolerance gets higher when I’m on vacation, and when I’m looking at something made in this country. I have to assume the store attached to the factory is made there (They’d better be!)

  25. Shpip

    Mr. Greedy is no more.

    It takes a village to raise a child – but apparently, only one penguin to create the village. Maryland Zoo’s “Mr. Greedy” died this week after fathering 230 penguins and helping rebuild the species’ population in zoos across North America, officials said in a news statement.

    At 33 years old, “Mr. Greedy,” was the oldest penguin at the zoo far surpassing the average penguin age of 18 years old. He lived to see five generations of offspring fathered through the zoo’s African Penguin Species Survival Plan.

    Nice work if you can get it. Job well done, good bird.

    • Shpip

      Although some would argue that the last thing Baltimore needs is more Africans.

  26. Suthenboy

    Pro-tip re: Buck Knives

    To sharpen stainless steel one needs a diamond hone. Other sharpening materials will gall (smear) the metal. You can get a very nice edge on them with diamond.

    • UnCivilServant

      Noted.

      What about the non-stainless, High Carbon ones?

      • Suthenboy

        Most stones work well on them. The ones to watch out for are the Chinese stones made of dust glued into shape. I had one once and using water as a lubricant the stone melted as I was using it. I am not sure how to avoid them or recognize them from genuine stone.

      • Suthenboy

        Oh, and the carbide steel sharpeners work fine on carbon steel.
        I use sand paper and diamond plate. The sand paper does really well. I used a tacky spray glue to stick it to a flat board, three different grits: 600, 1000 and 3000.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Pro tip, SOG folder and a chefs steel, my edc

    • EvilSheldon

      This is not true. I’ve sharpened many stainless steel knives with Arkansas stones, Japanese water stones, and in extremis auto body sandpaper glued to chunks of window glass. They all work. If you have an Arkansas stone that appears to be smearing the steel, 99.9% of the time it’s because the pores of the stone have become clogged with dirt and gummed-up old honing oil. You can usually restore the stone by soaking it overnight in kerosene and working it over with a stiff brush.

      I will say that it’s easier and cheaper to get high-quality diamond hones than good Arkansas stones.

    • Ted S.

      What if the film also has a cup?