The Ultimate October Surprise

by | Oct 5, 2024 | Beer, Food & Drink, Not So Easy Pieces | 97 comments

We’re entering this disturbing hellscape where Donald Trump is the Antichrist.

This is my review of the complete insanity coming from both the right, and the left on Trump ushering us into the the end of days!

The latest DHS memo was leaked.

Wait, what am I doing? Sorry about that. You’re here for beer and its now October. Here’s this year’s slate of Oktoberfest!

Fate Brewery Fatoeberfest: 2.8/5

I expected bette from these guys, to be honest. They do lager with a pretty high degree of competency but there was something a bit missing from their offering this year. Nothing go dissuade me from buying a 4-pack again lets say, this afternoon, and proceeding to drown myself in it, but its not quite there. Flawed but still solid.

Wren House Brewing Festbier: 1.9/5

For fuck sake, why? Amidst everything around me that is sold as real but is clearly fake, why fake this? Fake watches, designer jeans, fake porn, fake music, hell the ChiComs are even making fake Cybertrucks.

Of all the things you plan on faking, why pick the subtle skunkiness you might find in other Festbier? You know what I am talking about, particularly from the German brands the store had leftover from last year. That is not why people drink this, nobody likes skunky beer. When pressed it was suggested to me this is a leftover until I showed the canning date of 7/23/24. Nope, its fake.

Half Acre Brewing Lager Town Oktoberfest 2.1/5

I have got to stop giving these guys a chance. Quit faking it, Chicago!

Founder’s Ultimate Oktoberfest 1.5/5

You might be thinking I saved the best for last. Sorry Vanessa Williams, but I’m not sorry.

You are wrong. Very wrong. Sit there and rest upon your wrong throne of willful wrongfulness, and wallow in your self-wrongness. Because this is wrong. This is proof we are living among demons that wish to spread fear, cruelty, and hate across the Earth—in that order.

Actually it wouldn’t be too bad had they not attempted to call it Oktoberfest. It is a bit much, but they’d more likely get away with “Barrel Aged Amber Lager”. This style just needs to be made correctly to be loved.

About The Author

mexican sharpshooter

mexican sharpshooter

WARNING: Glibertarians.com contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm. https://youtu.be/qiAyX9q4GIQ?t=2m22s

97 Comments

  1. Shpip

    They’d been told they had “authority” to establish God’s Kingdom, and reminded of their reward in Heaven. Now they listened as an evangelist named Mario Murillo told them exactly what was expected of Christians like them.

    Seems like everyone wants to immanentize the eschaton these days. Same as it ever was.

      • Chafed

        That’s really unfair to the Cylons

        /BSG reboot fan and future husband of Tricia Helfer

      • KK, Plump & Unfiltered

        My former hairstylist looked like a combination of Tricia Helfer and Jessica Alba. She married some DC political insider dude and he fucked her assistant and filmed it.

      • Chafed

        Wut? Names, a link, or more information please.

    • Ted S.

      TO be fair, Kitt and Sri Lanka could have a love child.

    • The Other Kevin

      That’s weak tea.

  2. The Late P Brooks

    Is that dog wearing a Mae West?

    • mexican sharpshooter

      What dog?

  3. Chafed

    I didn’t think Founders could make a bad beer. I learned something new today.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Its not that its bad…its not Oktoberfest.

      • Chafed

        MS. You gave it 1.5 stars. Is there a secret calculation that means it isn’t that bad?

      • Chafed

        Whoops. Misread your comment. Nevermind.

      • R C Dean

        So its like the judging at a dog show – the dogs/beer are scored based on their breed standards, not against each other.

  4. Chafed

    With China producing more electric cars than anyone else, what’s the over/under on when learn about the environmental problems from scrapped cars?

    • R.J.

      It’s already known. But nobody puts it on major news programs.

      • Chafed

        Fair enough. How long until PBS, or one of the usual suspects, covers it with bewilderment even though it’s obvious to most people?

      • R.J.

        That would be never.

      • LCDR_Fish

        TBF…I don’t know that any of them have actually been approved for domestic sales based on safety features (or the lack thereof).

      • juris imprudent

        covers it with bewilderment

        Long after it is common knowledge, and then with the slant that this was all the fault of the manufacturers and had nothing to do with the inherent design.

      • rhywun

        Just making them is an environmental disaster. I hadn’t thought of disposing of them.

        Yeah, the left will hold on to this fantasy like grim death. They kind of have to.

      • LCDR_Fish

        We’ve had the videos (ADV China, etc) showing fields of “new” electric cars. “bought” to pump the numbers that China brags about to the world, then left to rust – just like their e-bikes, motorcycles, bicycles, etc.

      • LCDR_Fish

        I mean…you’d assume they’d immediately scrap them and recycle the valuable materials – even the entire battery – but I don’t think there’s been any sign of that to date. Although if they were reusing batteries multiple times in multiple vehicles, that might be a good explanation for the random explosions too.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      When its on fire after being T-Boned making an unprotected left turn.

    • Sensei

      Polestar and Lotus build their EVs there.

      Tesla builds its Asian and European versions there.

      I believe some other Euro manufacturers build their EVs there.

      I’d bet BYD could build a certifiable one as they have them for Europe.

  5. The Late P Brooks

    Trump campaign spokeswoman Caroline Sunshine said Tuesday on Fox News that Trump survived thanks to “divine intervention” and, after calling the left “godless,” added, “It’s important to remember that good does defeat evil.”

    Sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good.

    • R.J.

      Dr McCoy correctly stated that good can defeat evil, but only if good is very, very careful. Which Trump is not.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Or if the good is very lucky which Trump seems to be. If luck’s actually a thing the Orange One must’ve been born with a horseshoe up his ass so maybe he’ll fall bass ackwards into coming out on top.

      • R C Dean

        His campaign sure seems to be missing some easy wins. Botched disaster response, anyone? FEMA spent all its money on illegals on the first day of the fiscal year?

    • R C Dean

      Divine intervention? Luck? Who can say?

      • Drake

        God.

  6. CPRM

    I can’t wait for the big Israel peace conference in Megiddo.

      • Chafed

        How did you know this exists?

      • MikeS

        Not sure, Brooks’ pic made it rattle free from some corner of my subconscious. Before I forget again, I’m adding it to my “things to see” list for if/when I ever make it to Oktoberfest.

    • Chafed

      Monsters. Only monsters wouldn’t love that.

  7. Suthenboy

    I am not sure how long this has been true or to what degree in the past but it seems clearly the extent now and during Obama’s tenure is 100%

    The ruling class cares not one whit about the American citizenry, their interests, the interests of the country or for that matter, anyone else.
    They get elected and belly up to the trough. They hire and award contracts to their friends, family and acolytes. They launder money through fake bullshit wars and government programs in amounts unseen in the history of the world. They do this fairly openly and with malice. They despise this country, our constitution and the ideals it is based on. They aid our enemies and maliciously do everything they can to erase our culture.

    Dont like where this line of thinking leads? Sorry ’bout that, I didnt pull it out of my ass, I am just pointing it out.
    Trump’s popularity comes from the hope that he may not be 100% of that ilk and will govern with some degree of our interest in mind.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      They’re basiclly a mafia extortion gang at this point although a lot of the actual mafia guys actually seem to be patriots.

      • Suthenboy

        Bingo. That is the difference between them and the other organized crime gangs…those gangs, most of them, would actually defend the country if it came right down to it.

    • creech

      Why wouldn’t parasites want their host to thrive? As Lord of the manor, the more prosperous and happy my serfs are, the more loot for me.

      • R C Dean

        Because they aren’t exactly long term thinkers. Looters rarely are.

      • rhywun

        Because we can be replaced by another host.

      • Fourscore

        7-8 T is still a lot of money.

        Those political signs are going to pay for themselves.

  8. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Oktoberfest scheissbier, nicht danke.

    • rhywun

      Ja, Märzen ist auch nicht mein Lieblingsstil.

    • R.J.

      That is priceless, thank you!

  9. mexican sharpshooter

    Alright if you excuse me, I will be spending the next 8 hours watching my son play a double header. I will think of you all fondly.

    • R.J.

      Enjoy!
      I am painting old white trim with new white paint. All day.

      • MikeS

        I’ll be cutting wood with a laser. No euphemism!

      • Fourscore

        If you need more wood…

      • The Hyperbole

        You cut metal as well? I need a part for a framing nailer and it’s discontinued.

      • MikeS

        Yeah, I have a plasma table for that. You still have my email?

      • The Hyperbole

        Yes, I do. I’ll send you a picture of the part, If you can make one I’ll send you the broken part, to go off of.

  10. Shpip

    So, 55 years ago today, “Monty Python’s Flying Circus” first aired on the BBC. For those who enjoy cheese shops without cheese, bookstores without books, secret investigations by the British Dental Association, bureaucracies of silly-walk regulators, surprise visits by the Spanish Inquisition, Norwegian Blue parrots (lovely plumage), and Australian drinking songs about famous philosophers, this is a day to commemorate. But if you’d like to argue about this, you’ll have to pay.

    • MikeS

      But I don’t like Spam!!!!

      • R.J.

        What if I have a pointed stick?

    • Evan from Evansville

      That’s not an argument.

      • R.J.

        Yes it is!

    • MikeS

      According to the department, it is his third arrest, and he is a suspect in a dozen cases ranging from “auto-theft to robbery to assault with a dangerous weapon.”

      He is also listed as a suspect in twelve other cases, ranging from auto-theft to robbery to assault with a dangerous weapon, a Minneapolis Police Department statement said.

      That kid has a bright future

      • Brochettaward

        He’s just rambunctious.

        Or he’ll end up on the news after getting shot by a cop while his mom claims he was really a good kid and shows some 10 year old picture of him where he looks harmless.

      • The Other Kevin

        He’ll be playing chess in the picture too.

      • MikeS

        …some 10 year old picture of him where he looks harmless.

        Presumably not behind the wheel of a stolen car.

      • creech

        Bet he was thinking of going to college too and was respectful to his grandma.

    • Evan from Evansville

      I saw that too, Mike.

      Uh. Huh. That kid, and everyone/everything surrounding him, is seriously fucked. To have “a suspect in other cases” be a larger number than your age, especially with serious crimes and one’s barely a decade old? Uh… huh. I’m not sure those inner-criminal traits are ever Turn-Off-able. Can’t flip it. Everyone involved, including all of Minneapolis’ police and Social whatever Services personnel, should be paraded about town as they ‘answer’ all public ‘questions.’ <– The opposite will happen, yes? Yes.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    FEMA spent all its money on illegals on the first day of the fiscal year?

    Listen, you. That is a baseless allegation completely unsupported by the facts.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    I will be spending the next 8 hours watching my son play a double header.

    I wonder if the temperature has fallen out of the triple digits.

    • Drake

      https://x.com/charliekirk11/status/1842397453209026698
      Working for FEMA is 9 to 5 and no weekends.

      Sitting on my patio, I’m seeing more plane and helicopters than any day yet. Maybe people can get more done while FEMA enjoys their weekend.

      Two of my neighbors headed up to Hendersonville with gas cans and all kinds of supplies. Some Harley club is picking it up there and ferrying to the people in need via private helicopters. The government is just a hinderance.

      • rhywun

        Contradicted by the first comment. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

        I’m staying out of this one. Too raw and early.

      • The Other Kevin

        My wife’s cousin lives in SC. She’s fine, but they are taking monetary donations so their neighbor can fill a trailer with supplies and drive it into NC. This is all happening despite FEMA, but you can be damn sure Kamala will take all the credit when things finally start looking better.

      • Ownbestenemy

        FedGov response was surely slow, that much cannot be denied. FedGov stepping on their own dicks because of policy and regulation…yep. In my job, even outside of mayhem and destruction, we’d get our hands slapped if we tried to act on our own volition because we knew what we needed to do at a moments notice but didn’t have the green light.

  13. Ownbestenemy

    The internet yet again…responds.

  14. Ownbestenemy

    Lazy Saturday. We got our new fridge but seems like crappy craftmanship. Who puts the door hinge on the leveling foot? Looks like the bottom anchor point shifted inward which means you can never level the doors. I will try to fix otherwise request a new one I suppose.

  15. Brochettaward

    I HAVE NOT YET BEGUN TO FIRST

    • MikeS

      Tell us something else, Captain Obvious.

      • Brochettaward

        You don’t even know what you don’t know.

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Fort Who?

    Former President Donald Trump’s pledge to restore the Confederate title of a military base that was renamed has sparked criticism on social media.

    During a town hall in Fayetteville, North Carolina, on Friday night, Trump, the Republican nominee, said he would restore Fort Liberty’s name to Fort Bragg if he wins November’s election against Vice President Kamala Harris.

    ——-

    Trump’s pledge sparked criticism on social media, including from former Republican Congressman Adam Kinzinger.

    “Public announcement: the Confederacy lost, they were traitors, despicable and disgusting and while we should study them to see how brain worms work, everything honoring the confederacy should be removed,” Kinzinger wrote. “Screw the Confederacy.”

    It’s like a dog whistle orchestra.

    • Brochettaward

      I love the use of the term traitor in this context. I’m not some Confederate flag waiving redneck, but wanting to secession is a natural right of all people. Or at least should be, in an ideal world.

      They were no more traitors than the founding fathers were.

      And fuck Kinzinger.

    • creech

      Braxton Bragg was a sub par general. He doesn’t deserve the honor.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    That was impressive. Ohio State receiver holds the defender off with one hand and snags the ball out of the air with the other. In the end zone.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    Braxton Bragg was a sub par general. He doesn’t deserve the honor.

    And nothing in the intervening 100-plus years matters? There is no story to tell of Fort Bragg independent of a dimly remembered soldier? Nothing worth remembering happened there?

    They should demolish all the buildings and dig up the dirt, just to be sure.

  19. R.J.

    Decided to finish painting tomorrow. I am cleaning up in another 45 minutes once everything is dry. I have one more door and frame to paint.

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