Happy Halloween!

by | Dec 14, 2024 | Beer, Food & Drink, Media | 172 comments

I think we all knew this was only a matter of time before this one would arrive.

This is my review of Mother Earth Brewing Milk Truck Latte Stout:

Meet Jack Skellington, the Pumpkin King. Out story begins on Halloween where an entire town filled with Satanic Claymation figures celebrate Halloween the same way normal people celebrate real holidays: by not going to work.

Wait, my fault…This is not claymation. These are Satanic Stop-Motion Animation figures celebrating Halloween the same way normal people celebrate real holidays: by not going to work. Seriously, Columbus Day is a more legitimate holiday, even if you prefer to celebrate Conquered Indian Remembrance Day.

Jack is a highly respected figure in his hometown of Halloween Town. Being the one guy that specializes in the town’s Halloween festivities, his over the top showmanship is bested only by his performance the following year. Unfortunately Jack has a similar condition that everyone that seems to like Tim Burton has: depression…or is it autism? Its probably both.

Listen…Jack is bored with his life as the Pumpkin King and breaks out into song and dance to tell the audience as much, because naturally this is a fucking musical.

So he goes on a long hike in the woods and discovers a portal to other towns that have similar universes revolving around a permanent holiday. The one he picks is Christmas.

Listen…JACK. LOVES. CHRISTMAS.

Jack then announces Halloween Town will be taking over Christmas. Except the town doesn’t quite get it, but since they love Jack so much from many years of Halloween celebrations they go along with it anyways. They celebrate it in the way that only Satanic Stop-Motion Animated figures can. You know, by singing and dancing to explain their feelings, because naturally this is a fucking musical. Somewhere in there the actual Santa Claus is kidnapped by Satanic Stop-Motion Animation figures and his life hangs in the balance for some reason.

Listen…they can have a budget for a plot, or animation. Both was not an option, so they picked animation. As a result this story line is pretty thin.

But can it be made again? Well, Disney bought the rights to the IP a long enough time ago the Haunted Mansion turns itself into a Nightmare Before Christmas themed ride at Disneyland every year from October to January (I think). Yes I said it turns itself, because the mansion is supposed to be alive, you know. This development means at some point Disney will run out of their organic IP and begin to cannibalize the IP they purchased. As such they will eventually make this into a live action film starring incredibly dour, yet otherwise emotionless actors on Ozempic.

Which is great, really. Because it means all the idiots that bought those 12 foot Nephilim skeletons at Home Depot to adorn their front yards for Halloween, will just find an ill-fitting Santa suit for it and leave the them up until the HOA tells them to take it down after New Years.

I think breweries are starting to catch on to my white girl beer alarm because they are tap dancing around the metaphorical button I have on my desk. Yes, I am indeed this arrogant. The trouble here is that it is sweet, but its more of a caramel type of sweetness that they add to Frappecinos at Starbucks. I don’t really care for those either. I just order a Venti black if I have no other choice but to buy coffee from Starbucks. So while this isn’t terrible, I’m not buying it again. Mother Earth Brewing Milk Truck Latte Stout: 2.95/5. 5.8%ABV

About The Author

mexican sharpshooter

mexican sharpshooter

WARNING: Glibertarians.com contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm. https://youtu.be/qiAyX9q4GIQ?t=2m22s

172 Comments

  1. The Late P Brooks

    Because it means all the idiots that bought those 12 foot Nephilim skeletons at Home Depot to adorn their front yards for Halloween, will just find an ill-fitting Santa suit for it and leave the them up until the HOA tells them to take it down after New Years.

    I have long harbored the urge to have a crashed Santa’s sleigh on my roof, with grievously injured Santa being crushed by the overturned sleigh, and dead reindeer dangling from the eaves by their harness traces. I would never do that, though, because too much work. And attention.

    • Mojeaux

      I’m sure someone has done it.

      • Chafed

        I’d swear I’ve seen a photo of something like that.

    • Nephilium

      There’s at least one house near mine that has their 12 foot skeleton holding big ornaments and facing a large pine tree in their front yard.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Excellent

  2. Sensei

    Slow Saturday. I found stouts an acquired taste as I got older. Now I quite enjoy them.

    — “My challenge is keeping employees engaged. How do you maintain a sense of purpose if you think your customers hate you?”

    I don’t know. Yet people work for Comcast every day.

    CEOs struggle to process their new reality after the public glee at Brian Thompson’s killing

    I’ve actually met many Fortune 100 CEOs. Some are quite nice and some are the textbook definition of an arrogant asshole.

    But every single one of them live in a fucking bubble.

    • Mojeaux

      How do you maintain a sense of purpose if you think your customers hate you?

      Most big companies who push the “mission statement” bullshit would be fine if they just went back to acknowledging their employees just need a paycheck and benefits. No more yearly reviews. If they fuck up, tell them immediately and do whatever writeups, but nobody’s there for any reason OTHER than a paycheck. No, I DON’T want to work at your company because of culture or whatever other bullshit you think you’re bringing to the table. I do work. You pay me. Fair trade.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I wish to subscribe to you new business consulting service.

      • Sensei

        That’s how I feel, but as has been discussed here, it’s generational.

        Younger cohorts want more than the paycheck. We can discuss why and should they, but that’s what the reality is.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I’m not sure how much of that is real vs they’ve marinated in that “caring” business culture their entire careers and aren’t cynical or experienced enough to reject it.

        Also rise of tech company benefits and children’s interests as pop culture.

      • Mojeaux

        I agree with Gustave. It’s hard to know what they’ve been trained to expect versus what they really want versus if they even know what they really want versus getting beaten down by experience.

      • Evan from Evansville

        “Most big companies who push the “mission statement” bullshit would be fine if they just went back to acknowledging their employees just need a paycheck and benefits.”
        The ‘How to Not Be Racist’ DEI shit at work is especially dumb and openly mocked. So many Acknowledgments to be checked and all pointless and wasteful. See task, Do task –> Paycheck. Not that hard.

        Agree: Many in my generation and most younger think this is normal, or worse, should or needs to be. The inertia is great as far too many careers are built on, invested in this shit. It’s what they’ve been led through since literacy. “ONLY WRONG PEOPLE THINK OTHERWISE” is kinda what they actually think. Bro said he “won’t listen to people who don’t show they’re willing to learn.” Uh, huh. He is also the classic example of a person who think he’ll be among the folk In Charge of It All. Natch, after all, he’s among The Wise.

      • Fourscore

        Moj, you said it best. I believed immediate feedback was the best learning tool. Most employees want to do a good job and be recognized for it. A pay bump in between regular pay schedules is always a good feeling.

      • R C Dean

        My annual reviews for my minions generally took about 5 minutes. “Nothing we haven’t already talked about.” Then fuck around with the mandatory HR form.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        As far as reviews go, I, personally, are right there with you.

        BUT, listening to the wife, an HR director, and her reviews, it seems to be a great way for more ambitious employees to keep on tract with their ambitions and desires vis-a-vis the work place. Are they being given the skills and opportunities to move their career in the direction they want, and being given an hour or so to talk about it seems to be appreciated. Are there other ways to handle this? Of course, but this is a method/reason right in keeping with todays management culture.

        By the way, that tactic is far from generational, rather it conforms to ambition. Or lack thereof.

      • Old Man With Candy

        My favorite annual review: my boss (whom I adored and worked incredibly well with) was replaced by a guy with a very different personality. Smart as hell (chemistry PhD from Cornell) but very midwest polite and reserved. He pulled out the papers, hemmed and hawed, started working around his evaluation very gradually and elliptically. At some point, I kinda lost my patience and blurted out, “Are you trying to say that I piss everybody off but I get shit done?” He looked down at his papers and replied softly, “I’m trying very hard NOT to say that.”

      • UnCivilServant

        An interesting thing I observe about my evaluations is the chronic disconnect between my supervisors’ opinion of my work and my own.

        For whatever reason, their standards are too low.

      • Fourscore

        I hated reviews, I thought it was redundant. I once rated a store manager “Can not hit an inside fast ball”

        The following year I added “Still cannot hit an inside fastball.”

        Personnel never questioned it, never said a word.

        Counseling needs to be on the spot of the infraction, waiting weeks/months to discuss history losses the impact.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        My dad had a research partner with a PhD from Cornell. Thought way too highly of himself.

    • Chafed

      The important part is you acquired the taste.

    • Tundra

      I met Jeff Immelt at a med tech conference in DC many years ago. In one of my proudest moments I asked him what he did. I thought it was funnier than my boss did.

      • R C Dean

        + 2 Bobs.

    • R C Dean

      “But every single one of them live in a fucking bubble.”

      It’s the nature of hierarchies. Everybody filters the information they pass upstairs.

      Now imagine the wholly artificial reality the President lives in.

      • Sensei

        Yup. The name of the game is “access”.

        Also similar to the C Suite they all have the attention span of a gnat. It is why “they have people”.

    • juris imprudent

      But every single one of them live in a fucking bubble.

      [pushes on mostly transparent wall that recedes with a little pressure then springs back]

      • Sensei

        See!

  3. DEG

    The trouble here is that it is sweet, but its more of a caramel type of sweetness that they add to Frappecinos at Starbucks. I don’t really care for those either. I just order a Venti black if I have no other choice but to buy coffee from Starbucks. So while this isn’t terrible, I’m not buying it again.

    I like coffee stouts. I like milk stouts. The combination doesn’t sound all that good.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Buzz Beer?

      • Tres Cool

        Duff Stout

      • Nephilium

        One of my favorites.

        Another local brewery had to rename a beer several times (it started as Buzz Beer) and finally settled on Brew Carey. They also had an Oompa-Loompa stout that they had to rename as well.

      • R C Dean

        + several cease and desist letters

      • Nephilium

        R C Dean:

        That would be correct. The staff jokes about it as they still have some of the old signage up at their first Ohio location (their labels are generally the same head with different decorations for different beers, the Oompa Loompa had orange skin and green hair).

  4. Evan from Evansville

    Nightmare Before Christmas is a remarkably brilliant movie, one of my legit faves. Insanely clever, beautifully done old-school, great songs (lyrically and musically), and a great example of the ~8 or so Burton films that showcase that he was, indeed, fucking fantastic at his job for a time.

    Pretty thin story?! Jack realizes he shouldn’t take over other holidays and each should have their own place! He ends his conquest peacefully of his own accord. Halloween Town is the most fun, though I hope they have a Black Day Town for singles. I imagine the frisk-fest there’d be most open and attractive. (‘Black Day (Korean: 블랙데이) is an unofficial holiday observed on April 14 each year. It is mostly observed in South Korea by singles.’ Ha, the Korean is just “Black Day” in English, sounded out in Hangul.

    • Ted S.

      “Day” is two syllables in Korean?

      • Sensei

        It’s the same in Japanese.

        デー de and i.

      • Evan from Evansville

        “Day” is only one syllable and its own easy Korean word. But this ain’t; they just Koreanized the name. “블랙” sounds (vaguely) like “black,” and “데이” is just ‘deh-ee’ sounded out for ‘day.’

        “Evan” in Korea was turned into “에반” on all my immigration docs. Sounds like “eh-ban” at best. They didn’t attempt my surname in Korean, but all on on my Korean IDs, one of which I smuggled out.

    • Nephilium

      I prefer Hogfather, there’s something just right about Death pretending to be the Santa Claus analogue just to save humanities belief against the auditors of reality.

      • EvilSheldon

        Hogfather is the definitive Christmas movie. I’m kind of ashamedly glad that I’m doing Christmas solo this year – Chinese takeout, a few Irish coffees, and both parts of the BBC presentation back to back.

      • Mojeaux

        Neph turned me on to Christmas Horror Story, which I fluved.

      • Nephilium

        /tips hat to Mojeaux

        Glad to be of service. I got that for my sister’s family, don’t know if they’ve watched it yet. The girlfriend and I watched Red One… there’s the bones of a good movie there, but they were ignored for plot holes and CGI setpieces that weren’t needed. Several hanging plot threads that could have helped it out. They did have both Krampus and Gryla in it.

      • Chafed

        @EvilSheldon Chinese food on Christmas you say. I had no idea you are one of (((us))).

      • Shpip

        A Christmas Story Live! has received mostly negative reviews from critics, and it didn’t draw many viewers, but kudos to the cast and crew for taking an ignorant, racist joke and turning it into a joke about ignorant racists.

        “Who cares if our play sucked and nobody liked it. We got to show how enlightened we are compared to that hack Jean Shepherd.”

      • Nephilium

        Shpip:

        To make it better, if you pay attention in the movie, there’s a chance the staff was taking the piss out of the family and playing into expectations.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Jack realizes he shouldn’t take over other holidays and each should have their own place! He ends his conquest peacefully of his own accord.

      You know what, that is profound. In unrelated news, I’m going to scratch my article next week where ai take a dump on Depeche Mode.

      • Evan from Evansville

        Open inter-holiday warfare for dominance? Profoundly fun, when well-delivered with humor and memorable images and music? All through stop-motion? Yes’m, please.

        I’m too young for Depeche Mode. I do think Nouvelle Vague’s bossa Nova version of Just Can’t Get Enough is stellar. Always surrounded by old folk, it seems… don’t y’all have clouds to froth at?

      • mexican sharpshooter

        There’s definitely audience crossover. My sister in law…. *shudders*. Its okay though, she’s constantly flaunting her tits during family events.

      • Chafed

        @MS Where’s my invitation to meet your sister in law?

      • mexican sharpshooter

        sister in law

        You think you want that. But you don’t.

  5. Gustave Lytton

    Today I learned that background checks aren’t just on the purchaser, but also on the sn of the firearm. Pretty obvious in retrospect.

    Xmas gift is being held up because the brand new in the box firearm is somehow flagged and the FFL has to figure out why and clear it.

    • Sensei

      Somebody probably made a typo, or it’s a new group of numbers or a change for that particular firearm.

      I’m sure they will jump right on getting it fixed…

      • Gustave Lytton

        Yeah, I was thinking it’s linked to a previous check that the buyer backed out of.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Reported stolen in GA. Thinking is Walter lost track of it in distribution and was reported stolen. Apparently a while back and nothing came up until now because it was sitting on the FFL shelf all along.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Local PD took it. Luckily there’s supposed to be another in the back room.

      • Sean

        Huh. Very odd.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Interesting. I take it the next step is destroying it?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Ok, have another one. But requires another background check. Will pick it up next week. Sportsman’s Warehouse is my least favorite place to gun shop, but they had one in stock so thought it would be a piece of cake. Those guys are soooo slow and understaffed.

        Funny how the local PD can show up right away for administrative stuff like that but a crime in progress, if it’s not a potential dead body, takes hours or gets directed to make an online report. Especially stolen non-firearms.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m going to guess that they wanted first dibs on adding it to their personal collection.

  6. Chipping Pioneer

    If you have a problem with Starbucks coffee, why do you order a venti?

    • R C Dean

      Starbucks brewed coffee is just awful, is my recollection.

      • EvilSheldon

        It is.

        If I’m traveling for more than a few days without access to decent coffee, I pack a travel pourover and grinder and a jar of beans.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Because 90% of the time I am there because I am traveling, so I can’t make my own, and quite frankly I am addicted to caffeine.

      Are you happy? I am an addict. I am man enough to admit it!

      • slumbrew

        I bought a Nespresso Pixie for traveling. Good enough for an iced Americano.

    • Chafed

      It’s awful and the portions are so small!

      /old joke

    • DEG

      Better coffee from Free Staters.

      OK, it won’t solve Mexican’s problem of not being able to make his own while traveling. And I’ll admit it too… when I’m back in PA working remotely, I’ll work from a Starbucks and drink their coffee. Their nitro cold brew is actually good.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      The only problem I have with Starbucks is saying stupid names for things that make zero sense. If you have three sizes, they are small, medium and large. No, I will not call it by that stupid, made up bullshit.

      And, yes, I am one basic bitch when it comes to comestibles.

      • Fourscore

        Sampler

  7. The Late P Brooks

    Meanwhile, down at the nuthouse

    Basically, the message from some national Democrats and other public figures is, “Well, the people have spoken and now we’re going to get about the business of governing under Trump.”

    ——-

    Again, I’ve seen this movie before: rich people currying favor with a powerful president. But this isn’t before, and Trump is different. What’s so disturbing, enraging and alienating about the capitulation to Trump is that it ignores the gaping wound in American democracy. It’s just sitting there — festering — while everyone just goes about business as usual.

    I hope they took his shoelaces and belt before they put him in his padded cell.

    • Chafed

      Doesn’t he get paid millions of dollars a year to say this? He’ll be fine.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      That’s not festering, boss.

      That’s the relief most of us are feeling after the last 4 years of censorship and watching our paychecks become less valuable in real time.

      The only people upset here are the ones who wrap their lives in politics and live in the alternate reality where men are the best women.

    • Evan from Evansville

      Could have been reprinted from 2016-’20. I don’t believe I’ve gotten a sincere response when I’ve asked folk what specific *policy* they hated so much. Throwing in “He didn’t start any new wars!” hasn’t softened their spite yet, nor will it ever. Far too entrenched. Politics is personal, is religious.

    • R C Dean

      I swear, that’s the pic they use at Merriam Webster for “punchable face”.

    • Grumbletarian

      the gaping wound in American democracy.

      IOW, the people voted against what I wanted.

      It’s just sitting there — festering

      No, that thing sitting there festering would be you, shitweasel.

      • rhywun

        It’s amazing we even let those people vote.

    • Chipping Pioneer

      This was my favourite. Sadly they haven’t made it in a while.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      “Are you old enough to drink creatively?”

      I’ll try it because I hate their website

    • Nephilium

      Looks like a basic chocolate porter. Great Lakes Brewing started doing a Cookie Exchange Milk Stout last year, and it appears that they’re going to change the flavor of cookie every year. This year was a peanut butter chocolate one that was far too sweet for my tastes which may fit the basic Becky beer mold better.

  8. Sensei

    Inconsistencies. The new word for lies or made up bullshit.

    A woman who alleged being sexually assaulted at age 13 by rappers Jay-Z and Sean “Diddy” Combs during a post-award show party now admits that there are inconsistencies with respect to her claims, and her attorney says he is continuing to investigate her story.

  9. Tres Cool

    WRT morning lynx:

    Sabine Hossenfelder looks like Yeardly Smith but has that cool accent.

    Would.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Ugh. Beady close-set eyes, clenched teeth, bitter attitude.

  10. Evan from Evansville

    **Posted a bit late in mourning lynx, but a conundrum for Ev in the end of Dec. Advice certainly warranted. Today and tomorrow I’m going over my flooded inbox with ’25 work opportunities, I WILL be calling Grifols’ HR about my termination and possibly staying on as a donor floor tech instead of a phlebotomist at that location. Seems a lot easier for everyone. I’m still pissed at how they semi-greaseballed me out the door.

    This part is from morn: Unhappily, I am also once again unemployed. Kinda odd how they went about it on Thursday, 5.5hrs into my shift. Theoretically I didn’t pass their bar within 30 days of hire. I may indeed call HR to see if I can simply stay on as a tech instead of a phleb, for now. I did get paid yesterday, my first full 2-week check with ’em. So that’s kinda nice and also a kick in the balls.

    My biggest complaint to HR will be they didn’t DO any training. They only had me try venipuncture a few times with ’em, never explaining their SOPs, and then they kinda took me off those duties never to add me back on. I did fuck up the first time, the day with kidney stone rumblings, but the other 4 or 5 times went off without any hitch. It wasn’t a gig I meant to do more than a year, max two, but it would’ve been nice to keep getting money.

    I shall see what I can do. I don’t believe I’m wholly in the wrong realm of work, though my brain doesn’t react well to Factory Speed, I may have discovered. ‘Tis an interesting world, with plenty more discover and learn. I’ll see if any Dream Writing Gigs are available, but I like the long-term skill creation of the med field and what I had going. That reliability may be fairly crucial, ‘specially considering my odd record on the track.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Are you any good at medical credentialing? There are 3:1 odds that I have to fire someone next week.

      • Evan from Evansville

        From a cursory look, certainly not formally, though I’m quite able and willing to learn. (Not a Stripes reference.. ..unless it helps!)

        I happily subscribe to your possible employment newsletter. I’m also great at firing people, so I can take care of that for ya.. *cracks knuckles*

      • R C Dean

        Would advise against it, Evan. Embedded in a medical bureaucracy, and the job is basically relentless OCD about paperwork to a microscopic degree. I don’t think it would work for you.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking of “narrative inconsistencies” I saw something the other day about the accuser in the Duke lacrosse fable admitting she lied.

    • Sensei

      Yes. We will all be waiting for the faculty apologies.

      • Tres Cool

        Nifong asks for a do-over.

  12. Tundra

    I never saw the flick, but I would definitely be the idiot with the Nephilim skeleton or a giant spider.

    I think it’s time to watch Scrooged this weekend.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Scrooged is an underrated classic. I watch it every Xmas eve.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Scrooged is the second best Xmas special. Best is the Festivus episode of Seinfeld.

      • Tundra

        We’ll be in Mexico for Christmas and we generally don’t watch TV. Gotta get my fix in early!

        But yes, sorely neglected when people argue about Christmas movies.

      • Evan from Evansville

        I always loved it, but it had been a while and thought Murray being Murray made it special. Rewatched it recently and damn does it hold up. Murray shines as always but it’s a solid modern retell.

        Another of my Biggest Movie Omissions: I still haven’t seen Lost in Translation.

  13. Shpip

    all the idiots that bought those 12 foot Nephilim skeletons at Home Depot to adorn their front yards for Halloween, will just find an ill-fitting Santa suit for it and leave the them up until the HOA tells them to take it down after New Years.

    When I bought my house, my only requirement was “No HOA.”

    It’s made for some interesting results.

    • Fourscore

      It’s why I live in the woods…

    • mexican sharpshooter

      I love it

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      No HOA? How do you keep Florida man at bay?

  14. Mojeaux

    I liked Nightmare Before Christmas, but I was an adult when I saw it so it doesn’t hold the same magic for me that it would have held if I’d seen it as a child. I’m still glowing in the light of Yukon Cornelius and the Island of Misfit Toys.

    From dedthred, had lots to say.

    It would bug me to know I’m being dismissed for reasons I’m not being told. “You fucked up on days 1,5,13, and this is how” or “You were sexist, misogynistic, homophobic, ableist, transphobic, weirdphobic, retardphobic, religiousphobic, fatphobic, antisemitic (heh) on days 32, 61, and 78.” Okay. I may not agree I was any of those things, but obviously you think I fucked up. None of this, “Well, we can’t tell you” business.

    There have been numerous NPR Ladies. Why are we calling this one “Prime”?

    The last time I had to break things off with a dude, I had to threaten to shoot him to get him to back off, so there’s that.

    Justine Bateman had a screed on generative AI scraping all the copyrighted works it can get its hands on. Can’t find the specific tweet I wanted. Anyway, it kinda makes me ill, knowing my work is probably in there somewhere. It’s bad enough my google alerts only come through when my work is posted on a pirate site. Now, I’ve always been a fatalist, so my first instinct is to just stop writing, but humans are gonna create, no matter what, cuz that’s what we do.

    @RCDean: “Holy crap, has that kind of “cinematic” digital animation gotten good.” I haven’t watched this particular thing, but I declined watching Gladiator II because the CGI in the trailers was so obvious/bad. If I can tell it’s computer-generated, it’s bad. If I wanted computer-generated, I’d watch a cartoon. Don’t want animation in my live-action films.

    @Pie: “The Thesis that Killed Academia?” Didn’t watch the vid, but this was all over X for a couple of weeks. The thesis can be boiled down to “If you describe your characters as smelly, the reader will like them less. If your smelly character is not white, you’re racist.” People aren’t really reacting to the fact that she got a PhD on a niche topic. They’re reacting to how very silly and woke her niche thesis is and how broadly useless and how much money she/we? must have spent to get it. Basically, the harder subject/STEM PhDs are looking at her going, “Your PhD is on par with mine? Bitch, please.” I’d be pissy too.

    Re “trans kids” of military parents. No, I don’t want to pay to indulge the rampant socially acceptable Munchausen by proxy spreading through the citizenry, because if the cat’s vegan, you know who’s making the decisions.

    Today is XY’s 19th birthday and he’s doing a lot better than we had hoped 4-5 years ago. Put him in charge of something and wear him out, and he’s the perfect child. I have no idea how we all made it through relatively unscathed (well, we did; XY got his ass handed to him by the state). Right now I’m on tenterhooks waiting for a phone call or troopers to come to my door to tell me he’s been in a car accident, and honestly, I really am scared of everyone else, not him. Anyway, BBQ and cheesecake and Christmas lights at the Plaza are our evening’s activities.

    • Aloysious

      Why are we calling this one “Prime”?

      Because she does ~

      … … …

      You know, upon reflection and discretion being the better part of valor or something I’m not going to finish that STEVE SMITH type joke.

      Carry on.

      • Jarflax

        I think there are two factors

      • Ted S.

        The others are a composite character.

      • Evan from Evansville

        Stop being binary.

      • R C Dean

        “Put him in charge of something and wear him out, and he’s the perfect child.”

        That could be a recipe for success in life.

        Have you thought about marrying him off so he’s someone else’s problem?

      • Mojeaux

        He’s had a girlfriend. It was a vastly toxic relationship and her parents and we kind of tag-teamed the kids. It’s too bad that’s how we met up, because that girl’s parents could have been good couple-friends to us. Very similar outlooks, especially politics. They were Catholics, too, so score! *sad face at what could have been* Anyway, Bad Things Happened and that relationship went kaput, thank HEAVENS. So…I don’t think this is a good idea yet.

        He doesn’t live with us. He moved out about 3 months after he turned 18. Everyone is happy with this arrangement.

    • Ted S.

      There have been numerous NPR Ladies. Why are we calling this one “Prime”?

      The other ones have only been Utility grade?

      • Tres Cool

        Or just choice or select.

    • R C Dean

      I was referring to a wholly animated, basically, short story. Not mixing live action and CGI. “Cinematic” refers to the style, contrasted with “cartoony”.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Why are we calling this one “Prime”?

      Because I originally gave them serial numbers, but SOMEONE, not mentioning any names but rhymes with “snowblow,” kept referring to NPR Lady 2 as “Retread.”

      At least you didn’t call her “Retard.”

      • UnCivilServant

        Why are we calling this one “Prime”?

        Because I originally gave them serial numbers, but SOMEONE, not mentioning any names but rhymes with “snowblow,” kept referring to NPR Lady 2 as “Retread.”

        You mean it’s not because she’s an Amazon?

      • Mojeaux

        🤔

      • Mojeaux

        Chronologically speaking, Retread should have been NPRLady#whatever because there was one before Tomb Raider and there have been several since, before Retread came along. She’s probably technically #5 or some such.

  15. Evan from Evansville

    Uh, sharp… Ya kinda just described an interesting and ‘new’ plot, but with disdain? You semi-praise the ‘animation.’ What about the story displeased you? Imma reckon musicals aren’t your bag. I also hate them. These actually clearly, with wit and charm, lay the plot out, and the music is remarkable. Ha! ‘Kidnap the Sandy Claws’ (with fucking Paul Rubens and Catherine O’Hara!) is especially fun. Conflicts a’brewin’.

    (Full disclosure: I’ll go to the mat for this flick, like I did with Love, Actually. (Yeesh. I needn’t stir another pot of controversy.)

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Correct, I hate musicals. Tim Burton is not my bag either.

      *movie announcer voice*
      “Johnny Depp, and the lady from fight club, in Tim Burton’s newest masterpiece: White People Being Weird.”

      Also I wrote it knowing I would trigger…somebody. Not you in particular, but definitely someone.

      • Mojeaux

        I would watch the shit out of Tim Burton, Johnny Depp, and Helena Bonham Carter in White People Being Weird. Oh, wait. I already do.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      What Evan said.

      Sorry to hear about your unemployment.

      • Evan from Evansville

        Mo and Tox get it. Damn! TWO folk actually *agree* with me on a flick! This is rather new territory…I’ll embrace it while I can.

        And thanks, Tox. Surely for the best, long-term, but predictably shitty in the moment. I’m glad the Base Wisdom/Experience Level keeps ratcheting up. I did get a rather sudden fleet of new job emails. Will be interesting where, and what, the next gig will be. As previously mentioned, I’m pretty much in the simple ‘Pay me to do tasks’ and little else camp.
        Getting paid for what you love is great, but I’ve never really understood it. ‘Work’ is what you do to AFFORD the shit you love to do. (I’d perfectly understand it again if it arises.)

  16. UnCivilServant

    I need to start recording the second video, but I’ve been dabating what level of technical detail I should go for.

    I don’t want to get to “eyes glaze over” territory, but “Just solder it on” doesn’t help people learn, and I said in the intro of part 1 that it was about learning.

    Looking at the board I picked for part 2 I need to talk about electric logic levels and logic gates (at least NADN and NOR)

    • UnCivilServant

      I meant NAND

      Anyway, starting at schematics, trying to figure out what the circuits do, I’m trying to figure out the easiest way to explain it all to a general audience (ie, no expectation of technical skill)

      • UnCivilServant

        Anyone?

        My head is starting to hurt trying to figure this one out.

      • UnCivilServant

        How does that mess on the left result in a reliable 7.37MHz signal into the U1D Inverter? I get that U1D would clean up the signal the same way it worked in my debouncing circuit, since it only flips after the voltage definitvely crosses the opposite threshold. But I don’t see how the input signal is anything coherent.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      Logic should be reasonably straightforward. It’s not that hard.

  17. Suthenboy

    Speaking of freak shows…This Jan6 fiction is still a thing? How long did Germany keep up with the Reichstag fire ruse?

    • Ted S.

      Twelve years, give or take a month.

      • creech

        +1 bunker suicide.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      How DARE you minimize the pain of our national tragedy, The Insurrection?

    • The Hyperbole

      Which fiction, The “INSURRECTION!!!111!!!” one or the “They didn’t do nuthin” one?

      • EvilSheldon

        I’m an insurrection denier. There was no insurrection, but I wish there had been one.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      90 years?

    • Evan from Evansville

      It’ll last as long as it ‘works.’ I’m shocked boosters and COVID are still a thing for some. Some even still use masks! And not just for ‘safety,’ but as an easy disguise to murder someone in broad daylight!

      Still will never forget folk goin’ fast on scooters, sometimes delivering on sidewalks, without helmets but WITH masks. Such safe. So brave. Thanks Korea.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Dude, you raw doggin’ the air too?

        (sorry aboot yoo job.)

  18. J. Frank Parnell

    Which is great, really. Because it means all the idiots that bought those 12 foot Nephilim skeletons at Home Depot to adorn their front yards for Halloween, will just find an ill-fitting Santa suit for it and leave the them up until the HOA tells them to take it down after New Years.

    I have a neighbor who does exactly that. I think he’s had the 12-foot Jack Skellington in front of his house since Labor Day.

  19. kinnath

    Annual beer club Christmas party tonight. And we are totally iced over here. Pisses me off that we may not be able to get out.

    • Sensei

      Alternative is an icy road and a few beers. What could go wrong?

      Good luck and hope the weather cooperates.

      • kinnath

        The club has come to it senses. Christmas is postponed until January.

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s for the best. You’ll retain more members that way.

  20. Gender Traitor

    OK, I THINK I’m done shopping for Christmas presents for my sisters & BIL…unless I discover at the last minute that one of the Amazon deliveries won’t get here in time. 😳

    So now it’s time to get down to the IMPORTANT stuff! Go Navy! Beat Army! 😃⚓🏈

    • UnCivilServant

      🚚💨📦📦📦📫

    • Gender Traitor

      Of course, now my oldest sister wants me to figure out what I want. How am I supposed to know that???😕

      • UnCivilServant

        I’ve been trying to find some place that sells interesting blind boxes for a category I’d care about to surprise myself – but anything that might show up keeps getting drowned out by the garbage cutsey ones and funko pop trash.

      • Gender Traitor

        Blind boxes?

      • Sean

        The answer is bacon.

      • UnCivilServant

        @GT a blind box is a box where you do not find out the exact contents until you open it. Sometimes you get the entire list of possible contents in the overall product description, but other times it’s $Theme items worth at least $X MSRP (to clear leftover inventory)

      • Nephilium

        Thankfully the adults in my family don’t really give gifts anymore. We may hand over some consumables (fancy garnishes, beverages, food and the like), but that’s really it. At some point in the next couple of years, it’s likely that there will be no real gift exchanges as the kids are in their teens now.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Piss on the adults not giving gifts. We have huge Xmas every year.

      • Nephilium

        Muzzled Woodchipper:

        We’re all settled in, and can pretty much pick up anything we would want that would be in gift price range. We don’t need more clutter, and we have fairly divergent tastes.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        This is the argument that got the wife and I too just do stockings for Xmas. Zero pressure, as we already buy what we want for ourselves, no need for the other person to try and surprise us, or pick something from the Amazon wish list.

    • Gustave Lytton

      The words are correct, but the order isn’t.

      I would happy if Las Vegas was renamed to the Middies.

  21. mexican sharpshooter

    “Dad the shower is backing up again.”

    I am now endorsing Lava Soap.

    • R C Dean

      “Dad the shower is backing up again.”

      “What do you plan to do about it?”

      • Ted S.

        Put the same sort of warning alarm on it that trucks have for back

      • mexican sharpshooter

        I tried that over the summer. Turns out my kids would rather swim in the tub.

      • Ted S.

        Backing up, of course. On my tablet and accidentally hit the submit buttton.

      • Sean

        Zip it tool.

      • Nephilium

        mexican sharpshooter:

        While I’m fairly certain I’m not the one blocking up drains anymore, we’ve found some stainless steel fine mesh filters for drains that work quite well. When they get clogged up, you can swap it out and clean the clogged one.

    • Chafed

      I have two daughters. I’ve become accustomed to hair fishing.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Its not my daughter. You met me and are familiar with the horse hair mane I have to deal with. My son has the same problem except he has shoulder length hair.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      “Dad, the shower is backing up again!”

      Then don’t spend a couple hours in it every night!

  22. The Late P Brooks

    Parasites

    The Walmart heirs’ fortune stems from a company with a reputation of doling out low-wages for its more than 2 million employees worldwide. In recent years, executives have touted pay raises and benefits, like college tuition reimbursements, as signs of progress. Walmart did not immediately respond to Fortune’s request for comment.

    Even so, average hourly wage for Walmart frontline associates is more than $17.50, according to the company’s website. While higher than minimum wage, that’s still less than the living wage needed to live comfortably in some areas of the country.

    “Where do they get their money?”

    “They steal it from poor people.”

    • rhywun

      less than the living wage needed to live comfortably

      Tell me you’re a stupid fucking commie without saying you’re a stupid fucking commie.

    • Suthenboy

      I wonder if they know they are doomed? The retail model is dying and it really shows. My last trip to Walmart may have been my last.

      • rhywun

        I saw a blurb yesterday that Gen Z or whatever is bringing back the mall.

        I have my doubts but I would like it to be true. The online model works in some ways and is so, so sucky in others.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Everything has to be a “living wage”. Lake Wobegone economics.

      • R C Dean

        We’ve gone beyond living wage to “living comfortably”. I think “Lake Wobegone economics” captures it perfectly, as reflected in the endless stories about how people can’t afford a “median” house as their starter house.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Patel could have unlimited power? It worked for Hoover.

  24. Sensei

    The long-awaited relocation of US Marines from Okinawa, Japan, to Guam finally commenced on December 14, marking an important step in a bilateral effort to reduce the concentration of American troops on the southern Japanese island, officials announced.

    I hope it doesn’t tip over!

    https://www.eurasiantimes.com/u-s-marines-begin-to-pull-out-from-okinawa/