I am in the short-term rental, waiting for stately RJ Manor to be finished. It’s a good 300 yard walk up stairs and through winding hallways to get to the apartment, so the wife got an expandable rolling wagon to move groceries. During the unpacking of said wagon the wife suffered an ocular abrasion, right across the pupil. If you haven’t experienced this, it causes total dilation for days in both eyes rendering you temporarily blind. This is how the conversation went on the drive back from the ER:
“Well, at least I can’t see the movie you are playing on Thursday. What did you dig up this time? Mexican wrestlers? Lesbian werewolves? Another stupid sasquatch movie?” The wife sneered, delighted to be free of movie night for a week.
“Lesbian vampires this time,” I said.
“I wish I had gotten two eyepatches.” My wife sighed and covered her head with her coat.
Regardless of my family members’ feelings towards my movie tastes, I can say I am glad to have found a newish (2009) movie from writers who started careers in the early 2000’s, and a producer who was born when some of you were graduating high school. Due to the crazy events described above I did not get a chance to fully watch this film, so I will be watching it with you. If you hate it, here is a short film with Don Knotts, courtesy The Autopian.
So watch! Or don’t! Everything is voluntary! If you don’t watch, you will never know the answer to the question posed last week: Are these lesbian vampires who kill, or are they being killed? Pedants win, either way.
“During the unpacking of said wagon the wife suffered an ocular abrasion, right across the pupil. If you haven’t experienced this, it causes total dilation for days in both eyes rendering you temporarily blind.”
Big yikes! I hope she is feeling, and seeing, better soon.
Yes, thankfully the eye heals quickly. Three days later, with eyedrops, she was back at work and done with the pain. Hurts like Hell for the first 36 hours.
It’s good new that she healed up.
Hopefully the rest of the move is going well and you get into the new RJ Manor soon.
Diving into the movie….
I scratched my cornea doing yard work during peak COVID hysteria.
It made for fun times at urgent care with my wife waiting in the car because only patients were allowed inside.
On topic.
Part of that is just how different Vampire in the Garden feels compared to the current TV and film landscape of anime. It’s a jumble of post-apocalyptic science-fantasy, horror, romance, and road trip movies that feels like something more out of early-2000s Bones or Madhouse than anything being made today. It’s got fantastic animation, wonderfully evocative direction, a bewitching atmosphere that spans a wide breadth of landscapes, and tells a story of high tragedy that plays out in spectacular fashion. Its setting is a wonderfully eclectic mishmash of Nordic fairy tales, steampunk fantasy, and classic monster movie aesthetics that blend together remarkably well. There are multiple scenes that still stick in my craw because I haven’t seen anything else like them in who knows how long. It’s also just weird at points, featuring things like a roadtrip montage set to a Bob Dylan sound-alike, and as somebody who loves weird choices like that, I can’t help but embrace it.
It’s not perfect, but part of me likes it more because of those flaws. Its story is grandiose but also severely convoluted at times. The central relationship is all kinds of questionable considering the way Momo’s relationship with Fine spans the spectrum of captor, aunt, friend, and potential lover – often simultaneously.
https://www.animenewsnetwork.com/feature/2022-06-27/the-best-and-worst-anime-of-spring-2022/.186869
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_in_the_Garden
You guys would break out the pitchforks if I waxed that long about a movie.
I will check it out if I get a chance.
That’s his review, although I mostly agree with it.
It’s on Netflix, but it’s 6 episodes. I can’t remember if they are the standard 22 minutes or 30 minutes each.
I have never scratched my cornea, but I did have to wear an eyepatch for a few weeks once. Man, not as cool as we imagined as pre-teens.
Sensei, have you ever seen Kwaidan? Something you might enjoy, and you too RJ. Considered to be one of the best filmed Japanese horror movies of all time. https://archive.org/details/YouCut20190601150630617
Trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YadApPG8W7Q
ZWAK, no I haven’t. However, more than a few stories themselves are generally well known.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kwaidan:_Stories_and_Studies_of_Strange_Things
Telling ghost stories is a summer tradition. The idea goes to the idea that you make people “shiver” so they feel cooler.
Yes, I got to see in in CA at a theater which used to be next to the Winchester Mystery House. If it ever pops up streaming I will show it and give you credit.
Check the first link, RJ, it is available, just not through normally used source.
Got it. I have used Archive, but I use it as a last resort.
It’s over 3 hours long. That might be a bit much for a Thursday night movie.
It’s also a serious film.
How about Big Tits Zombie? It’s awesome fun, and the full movie is on YouTube and archive.org.
This version?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-Ah8wQyayM
No idea. FreeTube is taking too much trial lately to check YouTube links.
And for some stupid reason, JDownloader can’t get around having to sign in? WTF?
I had an unusually aggressive scarring process after getting some nodules removed from the surface of my eye. Basically, the cornea scarred over over the course of a few months and I was somewhere on the wrong side of 20/200. When I finally found a specialist who could deal with it, he said if I had stayed on the steroid drops for longer, it probably wouldn’t have happened. If she starts getting any kind of fogginess or other visual effects, go straight in and see if it’s scarring and she needs steroids.
It’s been over a year for me, and I’m probably back to around 20/60 with very slow improvement at this point. Early intervention would have been made it much better.
“vagine” LOL
Not sure I can get to the lesbians tonite.
*searches*
Okami sequel (!) popped up for me. That’s cool – enough to motivate me to install on current PC and play the old one beyond the 10% or so I had managed to complete over the previous 15 years or so – but I’d rather hope the sequel is on PC and not exclusive to a Switch 2 which I agree looks underwhelming. “Oh, it’s a little bigger. Huh.”
Yep. Console investments are diminishing returns at this point. All you can do now is ever faster processing and graphics. Making effective games and writing good stories is far more important.
So, do they kill lesbian vampires, or are they lesbians who kill vampires?
Ha! You will have to watch and see!
I know, it’s a terrible burden to watch fit British women prance around in tight clothing. You will persevere.
Wait, the Spice Girls are vampires? And Lesbians?
Do they make a glove for that?
The glove is an extra $20 downtown.
They’re lady-queer vampires who neutralize violent criminals. It’s not complicated.
My relationship with your shipping, on the other hand… *Technicolor form vibrates, shimmers from this plane*
How about “The Fearless Vampire Killers” one of these days?
We’ve done “Lifeforce” already, haven’t we?
Yes. I even did custom artwork for it.
I do love that.
Ax in head slapstick. I like it.
Arrrrrgggghhhh
I have got priesthood all up in my phone. Men I have NEVER spoken to want the tea.
Aunt Susie is spreading the word at church and being the victim. Fortunately, I’m in a different congregation and don’t have to go to church with these people.
Also, my husband won Chiefs playoff tickets for Saturday.
Free tickets? That DOES make your husband the best husband!
From what I’ve seen, get your story out first, tactfully. Quiet discretion gets stepped on.
Sounds like the Cuntey Aunts got their story out first at that congregation.
I would likely say “My mother wants to stay with me, so that’s what she’s doing. You are welcome to visit, of course, and I’m sure she’d love to see you. Just so you know, talking about her sisters and their attempt to take her house is upsetting to her, so please don’t bring it up at all.”
Update: We are winning the PR war.
The dudes and the one woman all at the top of the congregational food chain were not quite believing Phyllis’s kids are THAT heartless and ghoulish.
I laid it out for the woman. Bro1 laid it out for Mom’s bishop.
Tonight, another bigwig (relatively speaking) called me wanting clarification and he’s a financebro, so he led in with that so smoothly I was amazed and I was really impressed and I could respect it, so I gave him the scoop. INCLUDING “so where’d this $50k go?” Anyway, couldn’t talk long because the hospice nurse wanted to talk to me. We had talked for 36 mins.
So Bro2 asked me for his number and called him. They talked for an hour and a half. Bro1 has an already established relationship with Mom’s bishop from earlier in the week, so he calls him and talks to him about the financial shenanigans. A really really good friend of mine and Mom’s (I helped him get elected to state rep and got to go to the inaugural ball) was starting to wonder, so Bro2 talked to him.
Come to find out, there are regular congregational councils amongst the leadership about these three little old ladies out in the middle of nowhere who have no business being there because they each can barely manage to take care of themselves. It makes me VERY curious about what percentage of the congregational resources are being spent on women who a) shouldn’t be there at all and b) should be paying for the help because they aren’t needy.
Mom’s bishop told Bro1 he would call MY bishop to discuss the situation, which was brilliant. I mean, technically, Mom’s in my congregation now.
It appears to us as if their congregation is kinda sick of indulging Aunt Susie’s entitlement.
😁👍
That said (emojied?) It’s a shame there’s a PR war at all, but since someone (obviously not you or yours) started one…
“So! You clam lappers fancy a piece of me?”
Movie line of the month.
Lesbian Vampires. Wonderful.
What do you call a closet with two lesbians locked inside?
A liquer cabinet.
*Applause
*joins applause*
Stolen.
What do you call a group of lesbians with AR-15s?
Militia Etheridge.
*snicker*
I’m stealing that.
I don’t get it. Is there something about “Etheridge” that I’m missing, or is the joke simply that someone named Melissa is a lesbian? and Melissa sounds like militia?
Very good, The H. Yes, there is a musician named Melissa Etheridge who was pretty successful with the lesbian set 20 – 30 years ago.
Husband says ☠️
No one is coming to Hypervole’s window.
Autocorrect changed it, but I’m leaving it.
Funny how to this day, actors playing vampires model themselves on the movements of Max Schreck from Nosferatu.
If you haven’t seen Shadow of the Vampire, folks, do it now!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_B15iesNMa8
Yes, I loved that! I would double feature that with the latest cleaned up copy of Nosferatu, with the heavy metal soundtrack. I showed my daughter parts of Nosferatu, it creeped her out worse than anything she had ever seen. That movie is immortal because of Schreck.
There is a version of the silent film with a heavy metal soundtrack?
Also, Shadow of The Vampire is great. That would be good for a Thursday night.
All the versions of Nosferatu came from a common old copy from MOMA, if I recall correctly. That one is black and white. The original had some form of colorization, which was reproduced for an official version in the 1970s. And pretty much every decade since the 1950s, somebody has issued a new version of Nosferatu with a different soundtrack. I liked the heavy metal version I just saw. I hope it makes it to Tubi.
Tubi has the Synthwave version with the colorblocks, where the whole film jumps from all purple to all gold, etc… It is OK but rather jarring. And there is at least two others, one B&W version with a soundtrack by Bob Lanzetti, and another with a full orchestra.
I was wrong, the Bob Lanzetti soundtrack version also has the forced colorization, but it isn’t as jarring as the synthwave version. Probably closer to the original. I like it without colorization.
I’m reminded of Metropolis with the 80’s pop/rock soundtrack… I have the album, if not the film. Giogio Moroder and therefore awesome.
Not bad. Thanks RJ!
Glad you made it! It’s back to work for me now. And I still need to make a long-term schedule for Glib Flick. It’s been too much lately.
I could pinch hit if absolutely necessary.
I may ask for some pinch hitters soon. I have been struggling with work, all this moving around and life in general. I realized the other day I have not missed a Thursday in… well, I don’t know. Neph covered for me once and played “Repo, the Genetic Opera” and I can’t find when he did that.
OMG, that was May 5th, 2022.
Buffy The Vampire Slayer eat your heart out.
I’d eat out Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and I’m not even a lesbian.
Same here, because I’m not a lesbian. Ms. Gellar always jingled my bell.
Forgot the link:
https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-V9a4aIGbL84/T__el5u3nYI/AAAAAAAAANc/TA2pUMhXLfI/s1600/sarah-michelle-gellar-63-27486.jpg
I’m a Kristy Swanson man myself.
SMG made me feel funny
Hmm… No fights for Alyson Hannigan?
Why yes, my birthday is next week, thank you!
We were talking about Buffy. Which is not exclusive of her, umm, associates.
Also, to answer your previous question. PJ Soles doesn’t get naked in Hanukkah (2019). She also would have been at least 69 years old.
She’s still cute to me. I gave her a big hug last time I saw her in Dallas.
New Glenn and Starship in one day? Fantastic. Best of luck to both the teams to continue this march.
Gavin and Stacey without Stacey.
Good morning, all you mighty fine people*.
😎🤘🏽🥞
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2BUEzdjfpY
🎶🎶
* Includes lurkers, but not .gov lurkers. 🤬
UCS and OBE have a sad.
They are not lurkers.
Good morning, Sean, Ted’S., and Stinky!
Morning, How goes?
Pretty well, but I’m definitely ready for a 3-day weekend! Next big job at work is pulling all sorts of HR/payroll info together for an annual staff census used to calculate an annual 401(k) employer contribution (%age of each employee’s pay from prior year.) Not due until near month-end, so I think I’m in OK shape.
How about you?
I spilled my breakfast salad – on my keyboard.
Fun
“Breakfast” and “salad” are two words that don’t go together, son.
😖
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wx59zLqBRuI
Breakfast salad? Is there any meat in it?
A nice egg and sausage salad.
Skip the rabbit food and go straight to chorizo con huevos.
Why yes guvnah, I am retarded:
https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/more-trump-proofing-aid-uk-ukraine-leaders-sign-landmark-100-year-agreement#comment-stream
Lordy, it’s astounding how far the island that produced Winston Churchill and Richard the Lionhearted’s quality of leadership has fallen and Starmer is not only a moron, the man looks like a pot of oatmeal poured into a silk stocking.
He has the blank look of a sock puppet. Just nothing in there. And he somehow got voted in.
Was the absolute spectacle of Kathy Hochul’s State of the State been brought up? Like, has anyone seen what the first 40 minutes of it were?
I can only imagine.
Seems like no one can give a decent speech anymore.
No idea.
I can only imagine it’s 40 minutes of “bend over harder”.
UnCiv:
Since it’s before your time:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjKZzKLpNII
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JR35EPmsgZk
Funnily enough, despite not watching the show, I knew the reference – I just want to know what the gum was.
I think if you get a better version of the second clip, it’s Beeman’s
I also think that clip might have NOT been directed by Lynch.
So I looked up treatment of kidney infections because reasons and I’ve come upon several iterations of this:
“Your anatomy. Women and people assigned female at birth and people who don’t have a penis have a shorter urethra, which makes it easier for bacteria to move up to their bladder and kidneys.”
Great goodness, we’re doomed.
What if I have a cloaca?
Then you’re always infected, poor bastard.