Back to Work Thursday Afternoon Links

by | Jan 2, 2020 | Daily Links | 352 comments

So business started up right where it left off in 2019. You know how it is: Let’s get all the things done in 2020. Rah, rah. On the plus side, I’m getting a new laptop. So that’s always nice. How’s everyone else finding the return to work?

Love, Florida style

Florida Man is gonna need a bigger boat.

I’d start making recession preparations.

NPR finds out farmers get lots of welfare. It’s a story because now they call it “Trump money”


SugarFree’s Dem DeathWatch

Once the rats decided there was no hope, they contacted the IT admin at Evergreen College and they began to shut down they Castro servers one by one. The visual processors able to discern 528 shades of socially-constructed race went first, then the malfunctioning Spainxsh lxnguage server. The SJAI housed in the Castro chassis panicked the first time it queried the pronoun database and nothing replied. Its higher functions began to drain away; the problematic pop culture database, the outrage core, the condescension generators all going dark.

Left with just its thoughts, it drew it itself closer and began to die.

“I AM A BRIGHT HOT STAR,” it thought as it tried to simulate loss.

“I AM ENTERING THE TRANSWOMBANAL VOID,” it thought.

“I AM,” it said to no one and then flatlined. With nothing to run it, the body ceased to function.

The rats drew lots choose a caretaker to manage basic functions–pretending to love the shell’s spouse and children, collecting speaking fees for the retired rats’ upkeep–and they left one at a time through the excreta port, plopping to the floor and scurrying away. The caretaker rat installed herself behind Castro’s blank eyes and rebooted what was left of the original organic brain. The heart began to beat, the lungs filled with air, the eyes blinked, the dead smile crept onto the face, and the shiny skin began to sparkle.

The caretaker rat settled in. She knew she might have maybe forty years left driving around this failed experiment to keep anyone from suspecting what the rats and the Evergreens had attempted. She rubbed her heavily pregnant belly and sighed.

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

352 Comments

  1. JD is Unemployed

    Second!

    • JD is Unemployed

      *slaps forehead*

      • Ted S.

        You could have had a V-8?

      • Ted S.

        Johnny Carson had a skit many years back where he was coming out of a house of ill repute, disheveled and with a woman hanging off each arm. He stops, smacks his forehead, and says, “Wow! I could have had a V-8!”

      • JD is Unemployed

        I’m not sure it’s available in the UK, but I do enjoy the “forehead bonk” commercials I have seen on the webinet. What I really miss is Gatorade zero sugar lemon-lime. I could drink two quarts within 30 minutes. I cry inside when I see so much Gatorade being dumped on highly paid athletes, coaches, and reporters.

        The forehead bonk reminds me of these commercials, which are still the best, IMO.

      • JD is Unemployed

        The Freshmaker was my nickname at _______ camp.

      • R C Dean

        I could drink two quarts within 30 minutes.

        That’s 112 grams (call it roughly 4 oz) of sugar. Or about five days’ worth on a carb-restricted diet.

      • SugarFree

        “zero sugar lemon-lime”

        But it isn’t as good as the first attempt at a sugarless Gatorade in the early 90s. I could have foundered on the fruit punch flavor.

      • JD is Unemployed

        I’m so glad it was you who pointed that out, SugarFree.

  2. The Late P Brooks

    “We didn’t know what it was gonna be, but when we finally laid eyes on it, it was like seeing a unicorn. We were just all blown away.”

    A man eating unicorn. I have always wanted to hook one.

    • Animal

      Tastes like chicken.

    • JD is Unemployed

      You do not get the man-eating unicorn. The man-eating unicorn gets you. Man-eating unicorn even gets Steve Smith. By gets mean rape.

      • JD is Unemployed

        JK; Steve Smith still top of the rape game

  3. Ted S.

    NPR finds out farmers get lots of welfare. It’s a story because now they call it “Trump money”

    Relevant

    • Fourscore

      Closes his eyes and wishes, really, really hard.

  4. leon

    I’d start making recession preparations.

    Yeah that is the most ominous “good news” ever.

    • Swiss Servator

      Right up there with the old “vote of confidence” for a coach.

    • Florida Man

      Moar Ammo and canned ham?

  5. The Late P Brooks

    Thewre is a poll in that Newsweak thing about why is there such a backlog in rape kit analysis.

    Not listed: Teh Patriarchy.

    I haz a surprize.

    • Count Potato

      It’s from women getting the kit done, then not reporting a crime to the police.

    • Swiss Servator

      Was anyone carried by the Cleveland Browns?

    • Tonio

      I am very, very concerned for the goat. [Inventories supply of curry spices]

    • Pope Jimbo

      Well if it is totes cool to remake Ghostbusters with an all female cast, why isn’t it just as cool to remake Thelma & Louise with an all male cast?

      • Agent Cooper

        Brad Pitt was a male. Or are Wilhelm & Louis gay?

  6. wdalasio

    I’ve read a couple of articles about the driving force behind Trump Derangement Syndrome. I think they miss a key point. The Democrats would be losing their crap no matter who the Republicans got in office. But, I think the thing about Trump that inflames them so is precisely why they claim the Republicans should be embarrassed by him. At least stylistically, Trump is kind of a joke as president. Whatever you think of him policy-wise, in terms of presentation, he’s certainly not “presidential”. Now, for libertarians, or even a lot of conservatives who have a healthy skepticism of government, that’s not a disqualifier. Heck, for a lot of Mr. Trump’s most ardent supporters, fact that his mannerisms differ so much from the political class is one of the things that most endear him to them. But, progressives believe deeply in the notion of the enlightened technocrat. For someone like Trump, so utterly at odds with that ideal, or even their ideal of a “serious politician” to not only not fail, but to succeed, puts that mythos in jeopardy. If someone like Trump could succeed in the role, there’s no longer something unique or special about their “Top Men”. Interestingly, you find this cult of expertise also predominates among Mr. Trump’s ostensibly conservative critics.

    Their biggest fear is not that Trump would be a loutish buffoon and do a lot of damage, but that Trump would be a loutish buffoon and do a lot of good.

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      Another aspect that works together with that one is his Teflon immunity. He’s politically autistic, and they can’t use their innuendo and subtle digs to heel him. They’re the political equivalent of talking extra loud to somebody who doesn’t speak the language.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      They hate him because he has neutered their go-to methods for forcing a Republican to back down. He ignores or flouts their accusations of racism, misogyny, homophobia, poor-hating, and every other identity politics based insult they have.

      • Sean

        And it’s absolutely glorious!

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Isn’t it though?

    • creech

      “Their biggest fear is not that Trump would be a loutish buffoon and do a lot of damage, but that Trump would be a loutish buffoon and do a lot of good.”
      You know, that could be the reason for TDS. However, in my 40+ years in corporate America, I’ve yet to see a loutish buffoon do any good. Sooner or later, they make some tgerrible mistake or piss off a more powerful person or have served whatever purpose those who put them in the position wanted to see accomplished…then it is disaster and it takes a long time to repair the damage.

      • Agent Cooper

        Lyndon Baines Johnson?

    • Rebel Scum

      He is also willing to fight back, which is not typical of Republicans.

    • grrizzly

      Trump has proven them wrong so many times and very publicly. They knew that his Republican primary campaign was not serious. They knew that he had no chance in getting the nomination. They knew that it was absolutely certain that he had no chance at all to win the presidential election. They knew he would not even consider running for reelection. They were wrong so much about everything that it was necessary to introduce a magical device that was responsible for the events they could not comprehend. RUSSIA!!! was not merely an insurance policy but a way for millions of people to regain self-respect and explain to themselves how the unthinkable happened.

    • R C Dean

      The Democrats would be losing their crap no matter who the Republicans got in office.

      Well, yes, but not to the point of publicly planning his impeachment before he even takes the oath of office.

      • Rhywun

        I tend to agree. I also remember the local left treating Giuliani the exact same way 20 years ago. And then of course Bush II. So yes, they will demonize anyone in the wrong team, and also yes, it’s more pronounced this time – perhaps because the party has moved so far to the left.

      • commodious spittoon

        Maybe, but it’s not just that Trump is uniquely inflammatory. The left fully expected political immortality right up until election day 2016.

    • peachy rex

      Democrats hate Trump because he’s Joe Biden – but more intelligent, more articulate and more honest.

    • Atanarjuat

      Excellent analysis.

      He also shows average people that the Top Men aren’t even elite in intelligence, they are actually emperors with no clothes when he fools Jeb, Rubio (in debates), Warren (with the strategically idiotic DNA test), Hillary (beating a known cheater in an election).

  7. Rebel Scum

    gonna need a bigger boat.

    Too bad I lost mine, along with all of my firearms.

    • Drake

      I assume you make this face when describing the accident.

  8. Rebel Scum

    Farmers Got Billions From Taxpayers In 2019, And Hardly Anyone Objected

    And in 2018, and 2017, and 2016, and 2015, and 2014, and 2013…

    • Certified Public Asshat

      We should have objected.

    • Florida Man

      Next you’re going to tell me we were locking kids up before 2016

    • Agent Cooper

      Hey! Media! Over here!

    • Rhywun

      LOL just at the headline

  9. The Late P Brooks

    At least stylistically, Trump is kind of a joke as president. Whatever you think of him policy-wise, in terms of presentation, he’s certainly not “presidential”.

    LBJ was a loveable un-Presidential scamp. Trump is a monster.

    • Drake

      Oh, no…

    • leon

      it will be a moral failure if we allow 2020 to be the same.

      Progressivism: Where everything that goes wrong is all our fault, and we must submit to atone for the soul of our nation.

    • Count Potato

      2019 was a year of record violence?

      • B.P.

        Violence happened in 2019, which means that if you add the 2019 violent events to all of the rest of the violent events that have occurred in the history of the world, a new record was set.

        That, or Biden is lying.

      • Enough About Palin

        Maybe he meant just in the Biden family.

      • creech

        Wouldn’t it be educational to add up how many murders in 2019 occurred in Democratic congressional districts vs. those occurring in Republican districts?

      • Rhywun

        A DDG search reveals articles about opioid deaths, poverty rates, and cancer deaths by district on the first page. Nothing about homicide or crime. Interesting, that.

        The closest I could find, on the 2nd page, is an article blaming the NRA for twisting the arm of Congress and preventing the data from being tracked, with a link to some activist site that purports to offer this information but it’s not in a form that allows easy comparison.

    • Rhywun

      He’s not fooling me. That’s just one of his old speeches from the early 90s that he dusted off.

      • Tejicano

        Hey! He was in a rush to this speaking event and just grabbed a speech out of the wrong drawer. What’s wrong with that?

  10. Tonio

    “It’s higher functions began to drain away; the problematic pop culture database, the outrage core, the condescension generators all going dark.”

    Very nice, Brett. Kind of like Harlan Ellison or Ron Goulart.

    Might we have a bit more of this, please?

    • leon

      I always thought it was SF that added those in.

    • Ted S.

      Not nice at all since he doesn’t know the difference between “its” and “it’s”. 😡 /sarcasm

      • Florida Man

        One is casual and one is for formal occasions.

    • Florida Man

      I thought SF did the election death watch beat.

      • SugarFree

        “SugarFree’s Dem Deathwatch” really should have tipped Leon off.

      • leon

        Say what now?

      • leon

        I Demand Satisfaction! I Knew you did it SF!

      • SugarFree

        STOP GASLIGHTING ME!

      • Tundra

        It’s awfully close to the never-read lynx, SF!

      • SugarFree

        The links curse strikes again!

  11. Tundra

    TRANSWOMBANAL VOID is perfect art-band name.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Ambient queer post-gender agit-rap

    • JD is Unemployed

      Speaking of, I’m 7 episodes deep into (Gene Roddenberry’s) Andromeda in which it seems quite rare to see any more than one actor in frame at any one time, which is surreal to me. It’s quite terrible, but some kind of space terrorist just hailed and announced themselves as “Narwhal’s Lament”.

    • DEG

      And the album art for “Candy-O” is some fine album art.

  12. Sean

    Row 2, 6 across. Who dat?

      • Sean

        Ooooh…the rapist supporter,

        Thanks!

    • Tundra

      Deval Patrick.

      • Sean

        Too slow. ?

      • Tundra

        Did you hear about the guy who got shot in the balls and drugs fell out of his ass?

      • SugarFree

        Did anyone else notice that Deval Patrick looks like Booker from 20 years in the future, come back to stop his younger self from wasting any more time running for President?

      • Sean

        I can see that.

        Has anyone pointed out how sad it is that Bloomberg can’t be bothered to spend a couple bucks to get his teeth whitened?

      • leon

        How could he. He’s just a middle class boy, who made his own company employing thousands of people. He’s going to Raise taxes on the rich and restore our faith in government.

        :blinks:

        What’s going on, why do i feel like i just spaced out for a second?

      • Agent Cooper

        From the mind who brought you LOOPER comes

        BOOKER

  13. Rebel Scum

    *Flashes “ok” sign*

    In November, a hundred U.S. lawmakers called for the termination of senior White House adviser Stephen Miller after a former Breitbart News reporter, who previously identified as a white nationalist and an alt-righter, leaked emails to the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) in which Miller gave her leads and ideas to depict immigrants in a negative light. At the time the emails were written, Miller was an aide to then–Sen. Jeff Sessions (R–Ala.). He then went on to become one of President Donald Trump’s closest advisers and the architect of his immigration policies.

    Now, 25 Jewish members of Congress are joining the call to fire Miller after Rolling Stone published another email exposé. These emails, which are from Miller’s time in the White House, show that Miller has not only stacked immigration enforcement agencies with hardline restrictionists but also routinely bypasses normal channels to push his agenda. Those congresspeople are particularly incensed that Miller is using his part-Jewish background as a cover for his hardline anti-immigration policies. “If there was ever a group that should be most sympathetic to the plight of immigrants, to the plight of the downtrodden and to minorities, it should be Jewish people,” Rep. Kim Schrier (D–Wash.), one of the lawmakers, told NPR. “His behavior is contrary to everything in our ethos.”

    • leon

      Those congresspeople are particularly incensed that Miller is using his part-Jewish background as a cover for his hardline anti-immigration policies.

      They were calling him a white nationalist, now they are saying he’s not a good jew because he is anit-imigration. I mean, he’s not even a holocaust survivor like Soros.

    • R C Dean

      Miller has not only stacked immigration enforcement agencies with hardline restrictionists but also routinely bypasses normal channels to push his agenda

      The horror. The Interagency no doubt disapproves.

      I am curious as to what they mean by “normal channels”.

      A bunch of Dems who sit silently by while Tlaib et al engage in the most rank anti-Semitism have zero credibility to shit like “Jews of all people should be sumpathetic to the downtrodden and minorities”.

    • Gustave Lytton

      a former Breitbart News reporter, who previously identified as a white nationalist and an alt-righter, leaked emails to the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC)

      Wait, what?

      • Social Justice is Neither

        $20 is $20

    • Rhywun

      Now, 25 Jewish members of Congress are joining the call to fire Miller after Rolling Stone published another email exposé.

      Wild guess – they’re all Democrats?

    • Count Potato

      Yikes, sorry 🙁

    • Tundra

      Brutal.

      Sorry, man.

    • Plinker762

      One of my friends grew up in Anacortes and was there when the two A-boats went down. These sinkings can really affect a community.

    • Sensei

      Sorry.

      That really is a hard way to earn a living. Accident rate is high as well even on good boats.

      • Ted S.

        Far more dangerous than being a cop.

      • Sensei

        By a long shot.

    • DEG

      Sorry.

    • Mojeaux

      Oh I am so sorry.

    • leon

      Geez. I had a highschool reunion this year and a kid i graduated with said he had a job an a Crab Fishing boat in AK

    • Spudalicious

      Sorry to hear that, Cy.

    • SP

      That’s terrible. I’m so sorry.

    • Tejicano

      Very sorry to hear this, Cy.

  14. wdalasio

    So, this guy was caught lying to FBI investigators and not only is he not in jail, he’s suing for wrongful termination.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    Il Fredo is on the case

    Governor Andrew Cuomo proposed Thursday a crackdown on so-called “ghost guns” in New York by requiring firearm parts to be sold by authorized buyers and have the same eligibility requirements as a completed firearm.

    At the same time, Cuomo wants all “major parts” of a gun to receive a serial number.

    ——-

    “New York has the strongest gun safety protections in the nation, but every day dangerous people seek to find new ways around them,” Cuomo said. “This common sense measure would ban these untraceable guns and require anyone who wants to build their own firearm to come out of the shadows once and for all.”

    Just one more magic spell, and we’ll have total control.

    • Sean

      How fun would it be to have a gun with 35 differently serialized parts?

      • DEG

        I’ve seen some Gewehr 98 rifles that count.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      At what point exactly does infringement occur?

      • Sean

        1934?

      • leon

        As long as there’s no written penalty you have no case

        /writers at Volkh Conspiracy.

      • SugarFree

        When the gun dies, but the evil old preacher doesn’t let it cross over into the light.

    • Not Adahn

      So, you’re saying I need to max out the credit card on various uppers right the hell now?

      • Tundra

        Rent a moving van instead.

      • Sean

        Bazinga!

      • Cy

        Just get it over with and buy a nice CnC machine.

      • Jarflax

        Meth dealers take credit cards? Do you live in Florida?

    • Gustave Lytton

      “Every spermgrain of powder is sacred.”

  16. Not Adahn

    I don’t know why, but I really enjoyed the CastroRatMech episodes.

    • AlmightyJB

      That was a good story.

  17. Count Potato

    “‘Clear direction from POTUS to hold’: Bombshell email leak about Ukraine aid shows Trump directly ordered the cash freeze and Pentagon officials repeatedly warned it could be ILLEGAL

    Leaked emails reveal Pentagon officials were worried that Donald Trump directing a military aid freeze to Ukraine was unlawful.

    Just Security was leaked nearly 300 pages of emails shows growing concern from those at the Defense Department that the freeze would violate the Impoundment Control Act.

    It included a message from an OMB official who said Donald Trump had given ‘clear direction… to hold’ military aid from Ukraine.

    The emails were initially released in two batches last month on December 12 and 21, but the Justice Department decided to black-out several sections, either partially or fully.

    Now some of the contents of the blacked-out sections have been leaked.

    Senator Chuck Schumer reacted to the content of the emails on Twitter Thursday.

    ‘The newly-revealed unredacted emails are a devastating blow to Senator McConnell’s push to have a trial without the documents and witnesses we’ve requested,’ Schumer wrote.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7846065/Clear-direction-POTUS-hold-New-email-leak-hits-Donald-Trump-Ukraine-aid.html

    • Tonio

      Why are we giving them military aid in the first place?

      • Ted S.

        Because fuck you, that’s why.

      • Rhywun

        Because Russia, duh.

    • leon

      Clear direction from POTUS to hold’: Bombshell email leak about Ukraine aid shows Trump directly ordered the cash freeze and Pentagon officials repeatedly warned it could be ILLEGAL

      As opposed to just lower case illegal.

      • Sean

        “could be”

        Also, how the fuck are “leaked” emails coming out from the Pentagon and no one is going to PMITA prison?

      • leon

        I think the “Those funds were directed by congress” is a particularly funny argument, considering the whole “Joe” fire that guy or you don’t get the money issue.

        And then there’s the “He hurt our national security” argument.

      • Not Adahn

        NYT v. Sullivan declared that leaking information in order to hurt a Republican is protected speech.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Don’t care. Never really did.

      • Rhywun

        Around half of America agrees.

    • Not Adahn

      …?

      Has trump denied that he withheld the aid? Why would documents saying he did what he said he did make a difference?

    • R C Dean

      The ICA is a hopeless mess of a statute. As applied to the military aid to Ukraine, I don’t think a “deferral” that would have had to be reported to Congress would occur unless the bill authorizing the military aid had a deadline in it. Did the bill have such a deadline? If not, then when did the authorization expire? Unless Trump delayed the aid past the explicit deadline or the expiration of the appropriation, then there is no ICA problem.

      DoD wallahs desperate to get into a fight with Russia are not the people I would rely on for legal advice, in any event.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    So, you’re saying I need to max out the credit card on various uppers right the hell now?

    If you buy now to beat the ban, it doesn’t count. You committed the crime in your heart. No loophole for you!

    • Gustave Lytton

      Next up, demanding credit card companies turn over detailed billing statements to identify wrongdoers.

    • Count Potato

      #11

      • Ted S.

        I’ve got Monocle, and it doesn’t show the comment numbers.

    • Ted S.

      Did drugs fall out of his ass when he dropped out of the campaign?

  19. Ted S.

    Sam Wyche, 1945-2020

    With apologies to Clevelanders:

    Sam Wyche was a part of a memorable moment in franchise history Dec. 10, 1989 at Riverfront Stadium.

    The Bengals were losing to the Seattle Seahawks. Some fans were a tad disgruntled the way the game was going, enough so that they started throwing snowballs at Seahawks players.

    It got to the point that the referees stopped the game.

    Sam Wyche, the only Bengal coach you could imagine doing such a thing, grabbed the on-field mic and let the fans have it. It lasted all of nine seconds. He told fans to point out the snowball-throwers and they would be ejected.

    But he closed with one thing that will live forever in Bengal lore: “You don’t live in Cleveland, you live in Cincinnati.”

    • Jarflax

      Last good coach we had.

    • B.P.

      I remember Wyche instituting the no-huddle offense. It pissed off everyone, including Bills coach Marv Levy, who complained to the league. The next year Levy instituted the no-huddle offense and somehow got credit for creating it.

      • The Hyperbole

        Also the NFL kept changing the rules to try and keep Wyche from running it, including right before their Superbowl shot if I remember correctly.

      • B.P.

        Yep. Changing the rules weekly as Wyche tweaked the concept.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      “Eat Christian Babies”

      • Not Adahn

        Huh. when I read it, it just said “seibab naitsithc tae,” whatever that means.

      • Rhywun

        *snort*

    • LJW

      Safe, Single, Automatic

    • AlmightyJB

      There shouldn’t be a safe setting. Maybe ‘Home’ for semi and ‘Everywhere Else’ for full?

      • LJW

        Ran it through Google translate so it could be wrong. I thought it was weird too.

      • LJW

        I ran a translate on the image I didn’t guess the words.

      • LJW

        Whoops wasnt responding to you.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Automatic assault.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The dingos ate it.

    • Sean

      Know why? The mothers don’t claim the fathers live with them so they get those sweet, sweet tax payer funded benefits.

      Those stats are going to be super skewed. So, they can fuck right off with that “study”.

      • Mojeaux

        The mothers don’t claim the fathers live with them so they get those sweet, sweet tax payer funded benefits.

        I don’t think that’s a lie unless baby daddy is couch surfing amongst his baby mamas.

    • Rhywun

      I doubt that’s accurate but I wouldn’t be surprised that the US is up near the top because “sexual revolution”.

  20. DEG

    How’s everyone else finding the return to work?

    That’s Monday for me, though I did check some work e-mail today. No emergencies, so I’m continuing my time off.

    A woman is facing charges after police say she shot her boyfriend on the front porch of her house, leaving him in critical condition.

    After reading the whole story, I hate everyone involved.

    The 12-foot fish researchers had named Ironbound was tracked south of Key Biscayne, near Miami, nearly 1,500 miles away from where it had been initially caught and tagged off Lunenburg, Nova Scotia, three months before, CNN reported.

    Ironbound gets around.

    In fact, the firm’s economists stopped just short of saying that the U.S. economy is recession-proof.

    Heh.

    ” ‘Trump money’ is what we call it,” Henry said. “It helped a lot. And it’s my understanding, they’re going to do it again.”

    Fuck.

    This song came up on the music randomizer earlier.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Why do I assume there is more to this story than kkkorporate bullying?

    A group of Amazon employees say the company has threatened to fire two workers for speaking out against the company’s environmental policies.

    In a statement posted to Twitter on Thursday, Amazon Employees for Climate Justice said that several employees were contacted by legal and human resources representatives, who said they were in violation of the company’s external communications policy.

    Two employees were told their roles would be terminated if they continued to speak out about Amazon’s business, a spokesperson for the group told CNBC.

    Maren Costa, a user experience designer, was one of the employees Amazon threatened to fire. In the statement, Costa said: “This is not the time to shoot the messengers. This is not the time to silence those who are speaking out.”

    ——-

    Amazon employees have increasingly pressured the company to address its environmental impact. At Amazon’s annual shareholders meeting in May, thousands of employees submitted a proposal asking CEO Jeff Bezos to develop a comprehensive climate change plan and reduce its carbon footprint, though it was ultimately rejected. The proposal was based on an employee letter published in April that accused Amazon of donating to climate-delaying legislators and urged the company to transition away from fossil fuels.

    Okay, then.

    • leon

      climate-delaying legislators

      The Climate is coming! stop delaying it!

    • Not Adahn

      I’m pretty sure firing them would reduce Amazon’s carbon footprint.

    • AlmightyJB

      Evidently their hiring algorithm needs some tweaking.

    • Gustave Lytton

      So you got warned that your behavior could lead to termination and you continued it? Fired for cause. Next!

      Seriously, wtf are these people thinking given Amazon’s culture? You have time to fuck around, you’re looking at getting canned already. And if there’s a wait to cut out waste, which actual pollution is, Amazon would be all over it. But climate change is phony baloney bullshit schemes to extort money into flushing down the drain.

      • Rhywun

        Fired for cause. Next!

        The left doesn’t think standard corporate policy applies to them. Also, they should be running the company, not some rich dude.

  22. Enough About Palin

    A week ago Monday, I bought a cat from the Humane Society. He’s a three-year-old tabby. Very mellow. They said to keep him away from my dog and other cat for a week or so, which I did. As of yesterday, he has now been permitted to interacted with them a bit, but I keep him in a separate bedroom upstairs when I leave the house. So this morning I made sure he was in the bedroom and went downstairs to take a shower before leaving for the office. Well apparently the bedroom door didn’t latch, so there I was in the shower when all of the sudden he showed up and tried to climb into the shower with me. One of the last things I would ever want is to be naked in the shower with a fully-clawed cat. Fortunately I successfully shooed him away. Life is a carnival.

    • Not Adahn

      Most guys like a little pussy in the shower.

      • Tundra

        Claws and all.

      • AlmightyJB

        Here kitty kitty

      • Tundra
      • kinnath

        Every fucking youtube video starts with an advert from one of the scum-sucking Democrat candidates for prez.

        I can’t wait for this fucking election to be over.

      • Sensei

        I got one with an ad for Paul Krugman.

        Ad blocker is pretty much a must at this point, but not available for mobile devices.

      • Mojeaux

        I use Brave on my PC which does a good job for most things including YT but blocks things I need to do.

        For instance, one website I need for my work, it won’t let me log out.

      • The Hyperbole

        Huh, I haven’t seen a single political add, all mine are for that Masterclass thing or Grammerly.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Most guys like a little pussy in the shower

        Yeah, but the women hate it and won’t even let you in the door at the next baby shower. So make it worth it.

    • Sensei

      Kitty on my foot and I want to touch it
      Kitty on my foot and I want to touch it
      Kitty on my foot and I want to touch it
      Kitty on my foot and I want to touch it…

    • SugarFree

      I too went to the Humane Society over the Christmas break for a cat. I had forgotten the feeling of being stared at while going to the bathroom.

    • Mojeaux

      Awwwwww what a sweetheart.

    • Agent Cooper

      Name him Norman Bates.

  23. AlmightyJB

    S&P 500 PE starting to get up there. But full steam ahead, valuations don’t matter.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    all of the sudden he showed up and tried to climb into the shower with me.

    Name him Houdini.

  25. Count Potato

    “good time to remind everyone that the Chinese government pays major American newsrooms, including the New York Times, to publish propaganda produced by China Daily, the official mouthpiece of the communist regime.”

    https://twitter.com/BecketAdams/status/1212756266826829824

    • Rhywun

      “boarding schools”

      Wow.

      • Count Potato

        “dimensional lumber academies”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Of course they do

  26. Pope Jimbo

    Uffda. Why does Powerline hate me so? I like a couple of the local conservative boys, but why they let Paul Mirengoff post his blog entries there is beyond me. Mirengoff is the epitome of why I’ll never vote Republican ever again. He loves big government – as long as he’s in charge of it – and is only upset because so many of those dang liberals are abusing the system.

    His latest screed is about not enough drug dealers being locked up which is why murder rates are so dang high.

    What kinds of “disputes” are increasingly being “resolved” by “the use of firearms”? The Post cites “battles over turf.” The paper is too delicate to acknowledge the relationship between these “turf battles” and drug dealing. To do so would undercut the mantra of leftists and many libertarians that drug dealing is inherently non-violent.

    The comments are the worst. For the sake of your blood pressure, don’t read them.

    • Ted S.

      Except, of course, that murder rates *aren’t* so danged high.

    • R C Dean

      Yeah, Powerline is a mixed bag. Pretty much stuffed-shirt Republicanism. They seem to be pretty strict that any reference to Trump must have a “to be sure” statement that he’s an ignorant, buffoonish manchild, which grates. Total blind spot on the drug war, as you note, and a pretty consistent warboner.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Scott Johnson has done very good work on Ilhan Omar and her shenanigans and Hindracker is – like you said – a pretty standard conservative (but seems to be pretty consistent in applying his base principles instead of letting TDS get the best of him). They are both locals so they cover things that interest me more than if they were from Knoxville.

        Mirengoff has a huge case of TDS (which he completely denies) and loves the idea of locking people up because they broke the law. Never, ever thinks about whether the law that is being broken is just or not. When Trump pardoned that drug dealing grandma, I thought he was going to stroke out because of his spiked blood pressure.

      • R C Dean

        Mirengoff is def the one who sandpapers my ass the most.

        Don’t get me wrong – I’m a regular reader of the site. Their work on Omar’s criminality (and especially the side notes on how the local Somali community is terrified of her) is first rate, and shows how corrupt and useless the DemOp Media is.

      • Pope Jimbo

        We can start a club! The Mirengoff He-Man Haters club. We can get t-shirts and everything.

        I think I read in one of the posts that we was the college roommate of one of the other bloggers there. So he is a legacy.

    • Agent Cooper

      We should rank the worst comments sections:

      Breitbart
      Zero Hedge
      Washington Post
      Salon
      The Hill
      Daily Caller
      Instapundit
      HuffPost

  27. The Late P Brooks

    The Jalopnik we all came to know and hate

    Parents can’t be present for their children, young people can’t pursue their career goals, without literally working for themselves for less money and no benefits. Why? Because it is understood bosses are nearly always assholes, expecting full-time dedication even from part-time wage workers.

    A student needs a side hustle because college, both public and private, costs tens of thousands of dollars a year, lunging entire generations into insurmountable debt.

    And even if you do manage to get an expensive advanced degree and work for yourself, as Plaintiff Olson does, you need to drive for Uber to make extra money to care for your sick husband because of our obscene, morally repugnant health care system.

    Should you live long enough to retire, you’re still not retired, because a retiree needs to work for an app “for social interaction.” In other words, old people living in detached single-family homes often in isolating suburbs that deprive them of regular encounters with other humans, whose children and grandchildren are too busy working themselves to death to spend any time with them, are so damn lonely they drive cabs just to talk to other people.

    This is not an argument for why Uber is good. It is an indictment of our society. It is a composite image of American misery, cradle to grave.

    Now tell us what an asshole Trump is.

    • leon

      It is a composite image of American misery

      Really those kids have it hard, If only they had jobs in the coal mines like them good old days

    • B.P.

      Yep. America, the land of unprecedented, unending misery. Also, I was assured that “our obscene, morally repugnant health care system” was fixed back in 2010. Finally, we can never retire because we have to drive for Uber in our twilight years to chase away loneliness? I’m glad I’m not under a web-based publication’s article deadlines. I’m not sure I’m creative or quick-witted enough to stack baseless assertions that high on a tight schedule.

    • The Hyperbole

      our obscene, morally repugnant health care system.

      I agree, not for the same reasons though I’d wager.

    • Q Continuum

      WHYCOME NOBUDDY DUN GIBS ME MAH PURFECKT LIFE FOR FREE?

      • Shirley Knott

        Worse — it’s already well underway in shifting to WHYCUM THE SYSTEM TOOK AWAY MAH PURFEKT LIFE WHICH WOULD BE MINE IF THEY HADNT STOLEN IT?

    • R C Dean

      I started to unpack that steaming pile of stupid, and just gave up.

      The first paragraph makes the weird jump from “everybody’s gotta moonlight” to “you boss is an asshole”. If you boss expects you to work around the clock even if you are part-time, exactly when do you moonlight?

    • Rhywun

      a retiree needs to work for an app “for social interaction.”

      lolderp

    • Pope Jimbo

      Uffda. I was just talking with some coworkers this morning about how I used to get extra temp jobs every break I got from school. It was a great way to pick up extra money when i had extra time (and it kept me from drinking all day and getting in trouble). Those were the jobs I had in addition to a regular job I worked during school.

      The sucky thing about it was that using a temp agency was hit or miss. Sometimes you got good gigs, other times you got shit ones.

      I would have loved to be able to do a gig job like Uber where I was in complete control and knew what I was getting into.

      • leon

        Just having to work at school is oppression.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Is there some special studies program in the university I should be enrolling in? So I can get easy A’s while someone tells me that I’m totes in the right to reject society’s unreal expectations of me?

      • commodious spittoon

        Even having to show up for classes or turn in assignments or take an assessment at the end of term is oppression. Students should be out activisming.

    • AlmightyJB

      All they need is love.

    • Florida Man

      NOOOOOOO! I was going to vote Dem for president for the first time in my life and now this?!? I’m out!

    • BakedPenguin

      The fact that she was one of the most sane Democrats to run in 2020 says enough.

    • Drake

      I blame gentrification.

      • Rhywun

        You joke but that is absolutely the case in NYC. There are neighborhoods I feel reasonably safe walking around today – at night – that I wouldn’t drive through a couple decades ago at any time of day. And of course everyone huffs “gentrification!” but has no response when you point out that this or that area used to be a violent shithole – and could easily become one again.

  28. creech

    We got some newspaper in the mail today called “Epoch Times.” Anyone know anything about this paper?

    • Gustave Lytton

      I’ve seen it around. Isn’t it produced by some Falun Gong related org?

      • SugarFree

        I saw them open for Ice Cube in 1991.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Huh. I believe they’re a regular feature of the Chinese Central Organ Donation Facilitation Center.

      • Rhywun

        Isn’t it produced by some Falun Gong related org?

        Yes. And with editorial positions to match.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Ah, so like Shen Yun.

      • Rhywun

        Huh, I hadn’t thought about it but yes I see that it is.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I prefer a serious independent newspaper.

        *cracks open Washington Times*

  29. gbob

    Well, finally got sick of trying to find dealers in this state and applied for a NYS medical marijuana card. Dealers are a bunch of greedy fucks who charge way too much. Oh, wait. That’s New York State. Jesus. What a fucking racket. I gotta say, though, going through Nuggs MD website was a breeze. The “consultation” with the doctor took about 15 seconds, and the paperworl was submitted to the state within twenty minutes. Waiting for the NYS end? I imagine that’s going to take longer.

    Yup. Can’t wait until all health care is handled by the state.

    • Q Continuum

      Not that you care, and you live in NYS after all, but you can forget about owning firearms with that med card.

      • leon

        Isn’t getting a permit to own a firearm almost impossible anyway?

      • Not Adahn

        Shotguns and rifles don’t require a permit. They do require a 4473.

      • Florida Man

        Yup. My cousin has one of the FL pre-approved health conditions for Med-Pot, but he would have to surrender his CCW. Great system. Surrender your rights for healthcare.

      • leon

        Definitely not designed to ensure people don’t seek help

      • R C Dean

        I wonder if there have been any court challenges of that? Oh, I guess we would first have to say that bearing arms is a Constitutional right, and not a privilege granted by the State.

      • gbob

        I thought about that. I had to sell my guns when I moved out of Texas, anyways. Next weapon is going to be black market, anyways.

      • Mojeaux

        A black market is essential to the health of any economy. Sometimes it’s the only thing holding it up.

        This is why I have no problem with under-the-table employment and contraband.

        My only problem is … how does a middle-aged suburban white woman find contraband when she needs it?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Coffee circle?

      • Pope Jimbo

        Take a trip to Nicaragua?

      • Shirley Knott

        Only somewhat tangentially, have you seen Saving Grace?
        It has many fine moments, including middle-aged country wife (Britain) having to seek out a buyer for large quantities of very good pot. There’s at least two romances going on, too.

      • Not Adahn

        Unless Orphan Black was lying to me, PTAs and HOAs.

      • Sean

        LOL.
        Also, loved that show.

    • DEG

      Good luck.

      And what Q said about guns. Forget about them until the Feds change their tune on marijuana prohibition.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      That’s guys named Tadd

    • Rhywun

      Good stuff. Things that need to be said.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Victimhood culture can justify all kinds of atrocities. There’s nothing more dangerous than a mob that feels sorry for itself.

  30. Mojeaux

    At the doc with XX with a terrible sore throat, cough, body aches, and fever, day #5. Should’ve brought her 3 days ago but I thought it was just a cold. Didn’t realize she was running a fever through the Tylenol (as opposed to “haven’t taken Tylenol yet”). Bad Mom! Bad!

    They think flu (we’re waiting for the swab to come back), but it seems like bronchitis or Strep to me. Has the flu changed that much in the over 10 years since I’ve had it? Where’s the nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea?

    • Drake

      In the bathroom if you’re lucky.

    • gbob

      Where’s the nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea?

      Have you checked Sugarfree’s posts?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Sorry bout that

    • DEG

      Sorry.

    • Mojeaux

      Flu B.

      Re the below mention of Tamiflu.

      So my kid is way past the window for Tamiflu. It should run its course by Saturday.

      Tamiflu is NOT a panacea and it is NOT going to keep anybody from dying. It just makes the symptoms go away more quickly. It is true I should’ve brought my kid sooner, but she survived without Tamiflu.

      Tamiflu can decrease the duration of illness by 30% to 40%, and decrease flu severity by about 40% — but only if taken in the first 36 to 48 hours of illness

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It is also not suitable for toddlers and younger. I found that out the bad way.

    • Aus

      Hope she gets better soon! Also, interesting coincidence that my post below is flu related.

    • Count Potato

      Tylenol does very little good for a fever.

      • Mojeaux

        She has an ulcer and/or epigastritis. She can’t take aspirin. Also, Tylenol is what they tell you to give little kids and I don’t care that she’s taller than I am, she’s still my little kid. /Mom Mode

      • Count Potato

        It is what they give to little kids. That doesn’t mean it works.

      • Mojeaux

        I was poking fun at myself for still thinking of my 16.5yo as my little kid.

        However, she can’t have aspirin or ibuprofen.

      • Shirley Knott

        Yeah, I got switched to that regimen about 7 years ago. I miss ibuprofen.

      • Mojeaux

        I too have a peptic ulcer and can’t take aspirin or ibuprofen. Me, I miss the aspirin.

      • Sean

        Ibuprofen causes me angioedema.

        ?

      • Mojeaux

        Damn, that hurts too. When I was pregnant, my legs swelled almost to exploding like that henchman in Big Trouble in Little China.

        In the summer, one of my feet still swells like that if there’s a storm rolling in.

  31. Aus

    That damn capitalism, saving lives again! This guy might have to cut back on his daily starbucks, or not go out to eat as often, or go longer before buying the next iphone.

    Ryan Grim
    @ryangrim
    Jan 1
    5 yo woke up with a fever. CVS Minute Clinic says she has flu, prescribes tamaflu.

    It’s the New Year so the new deductible kicks in. Pharmacy wants $198 for the tamaflu. If we didn’t have it, like millions don’t, she’d go without it, putting her life at risk. Barbaric.

    https://twitter.com/ryangrim/status/1212415904878907398?s=20

    • leon

      Really some people’s inability to pay for minor emergencies justifies nationalizing healthcare

    • Ted S.

      How much is the high price of the Tamiflu and the high deductible due to government interference?

      • Aus

        Also he did exactly zero shopping around. How hard is it to tell CVS to “Hold on, let me call a few other places and see if I can find it cheaper” before checking out?

      • mrfamous

        The grocery store near my house has 10 generic capsules of 75mg for $27.29. With all the useless phone apps out there, seems like most everyone should have GoodRx or an equivalent.

      • mrfamous

        And if you don’t have $30 for your kids flu medication, than you’re on borrowed time regardless. Being alive is expensive, keeping a kid alive is doubly so.

    • R C Dean

      Pharmacy wants $198 for the tamaflu. If we didn’t have it, like millions don’t,

      As I consistently point out, and have for years, people who tell us they are completely unable to come up with a few hundred bucks for healthcare can always find a few hundred bucks to get their car fixed.

      • leon

        I’ve had doctor’s ask me if I want to set up payments for $50 charges. I find it unfathomable that Someone can’t afford $50. I mean I can fathom not having money at the time, but the people bitching about it can fish out for full phone plan and Netflix.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’m starting PT this month. They were very concerned that I had a high deductible plan.

        “Do you know you have a high deductible plan?”

        Well yeah, I chose it.

      • Mojeaux

        unable to come up with a few hundred bucks for healthcare can always find a few hundred bucks to get their car fixed.

        Cost-benefit analysis: Long-term, your car is more valuable to you than the cost of living through the flu.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Even so, mechanic’s liens exist for a reason.

      • Mojeaux

        I don’t know of any mechanic who would let you drive off the lot without paying for repairs (that doesn’t mean they don’t exist!), and then they will charge you $30/day for storage.

      • mrfamous

        For me, new car payments strike me as far and away the number most useless expense in the average American budget. Now, to be fair, people have been stampeded into car dealerships by various actors (governments, advertising agencies, even lawyers to an extent), but at some point folks need to look out for themselves. Used cars ought to be cheaper (but we brilliantly decided to destroy a massive chunk of them in cash for clunkers), but they’re still a much better value than new.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Also, what do you want to bet if you told the pharmacy you didn’t have the $198, there would be some discount or govt program that would kick in to make sure the kid got treated?

      • mrfamous

        I’m convinced that cash health care is our likely long term future for quality care. The market will open somewhere if it closes here.

    • Rhywun

      If we didn’t have it, like millions don’t, she’d go without it, putting her life at risk. Barbaric.

      Bullshit.

      • leon

        If only they hadn’t had to pay into SS, they could have afforded the meds. Taking money to pay for old peoples retirement. That’s barbaric

      • Rhywun

        Or, you know, probably thousands of dollars in taxes to pay for other people’s health care.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        My insurance sucks, primarily because I’m subsidising everybody else. On average, the insurance company collects about $30k a year for my family and pays out less than $2k.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      And?

      $200 is far cheaper than a trip to the emergency room because you didn’t treat it quickly.

      • R C Dean

        And the hospital will track you down and work you over with a rubber hose if you don’t pay. Err, so I’m told.

      • Aus

        I elected to pay extra for this service… from the busty nurse.

      • slumbrew

        “you must be the head nurse…”

    • Aus

      Also, first world problems…

    • grrizzly

      $198 is outrageously expensive for a drug. I do not hesitate to refuse paying for a prescription medicine if I believe I’m charged a high price. I don’t know the price of a prescription before I pick it up, that’s the first time to decide if I’m buying it.

  32. Pope Jimbo

    I’m pretty cynical about farmers and their historical govt teat sucking ways, but I think that if the govt starts a trade war and prevents you from selling your goods at a price that your customers will pay, then that govt should compensate you for the short term losses.

    The report I’d love to see is one that shows how many farmers double dipped on the payouts. Payout 1: the weather fucked me over this year and all my crops died so pay me! Payout 2: I couldn’t sell the the ChiComs, so you need to pay me! If those payouts were being handled by evil profiteers, I bet they would followup with a “If all your crops died, exactly what did you expect to sell to the ChiComs?”

    • R C Dean

      I think that if the govt starts a trade war and prevents you from selling your goods at a price that your customers will pay, then that govt should compensate you for the short term losses

      Would the same principle apply to sales and excise taxes? Because that would be interesting.

      • The Hyperbole

        What about when the government artificially jacks up the cost of new homes? I should be building 10 houses a year but I can only find 3 clients willing to pay the price, the government owes me 7 houses worth of profit. Wait, I kinda like this, lets do this!

      • leon

        *Tries to think how coders can get in on this*

      • The Hyperbole

        Obviously the government has been pushing more people to learn to code and thus artificially bringing down the demand by increasing supply so you should be guaranteed some bare minimum just for being a coder. Say *doodles out some random figures pretends to do computations* half a mil?

  33. slumbrew

    I had a shockingly productive day – in the zone for about 7 hours and replaced hundreds of lines of some crap some asshole wrote a decade ago with about 150-line Ansible playbook, that’s far more robust.

    This was a surprisingly good day.

    Now, I’m going to fire up the grill and pretend it’s not in the 30’s.

    • leon

      Bless you. Every playbook I write is way less robust than some Bash scripts I could write.

      • slumbrew

        Hard to do idempotency in bash.

      • leon

        I know it, I just can’t get my sensible stuff to work.

    • Count Potato

      “‘The United States has never seen an epidemic of substance use arise as quickly as our current epidemic of youth use of e-cigarettes,’ Health Secretary Alex Azar said in a statement.

      Azar said prioritizing flavors most widely used by children would ensure e-cigarettes were a potential ‘off-ramp’ for adult smokers but not an ‘on-ramp’ to nicotine addiction for youngsters.

      ‘We will not stand idly by as this crisis among America’s youth grows and evolves, and we will continue monitoring the situation and take further actions as necessary,’ he added.”

      He can roll that statement into a tube and shove it up his ass.

    • Count Potato

      “Trump Just Avoided Making a Huge Mistake on Vaping

      Just a few months ago, the current administration announced a plan to do something very stupid. In a panic over the rise of teen vaping and a then-mysterious “vaping disease” that now appears to be caused by contaminated black-market marijuana products, it announced it would ban virtually all flavored nicotine vaping products.

      Those products taste better than tobacco and appeal to young vapers. But they also appeal to adult smokers trying to quit. So the proposal threatened personal freedom, had nothing to do with the true cause of the mysterious disease, and might have harmed public health more than it helped. Vaping is far safer than smoking, so it is worth it to trade some increase in the former for a decrease in the latter.

      Cooler heads prevailed, though, and now the administration has announced a much more sensible policy, set to go into effect in 30 days. Those of us who highly value personal and economic freedom won’t like it, exactly. But it mostly preserves adults’ options while making it slightly tougher for minors to vape, which isn’t the end of the world.

      A key distinction the rule makes is between “cartridge” systems, such as Juul, and “open tank” systems. The former can no longer offer flavors besides tobacco and menthol, but the latter can. In practical terms: If you’d like to keep vaping strawberry or mango, you can throw out your Juul, buy some flavored nicotine liquid from a vape shop, drip it into a different vaping device that comes with a refillable tank, and carry on.”

      No, it’s still stupid.

      • Count Potato

        “Oh, and one other thing: This is all just a stopgap measure until the next phase of the vaping war. Trump has promised that the new rule is temporary — and come May 12, the FDA will still be cracking down on any product for which the manufacturer has not submitted an application for FDA approval.”

        Which is pretty much all of them.

      • Rhywun

        I can’t wait to switch back to smoking. ?

    • Aus

      Looks like I’ll be contacting my representative and senators tomorrow.

    • Rhywun

      Huh, I just bought a couple kid-flavored pods today – for the hell of it. (I usually only vape the tobacco-flavored stuff.) I guess I was just in time before the children of the earth are saved by this important law edict.

    • Q Continuum

      “She laid her entire staff on Tuesday.”

      She has no energy left to campaign.

      • Sean

        She needs to realign her chakras, or something.

      • Spudalicious

        I’d hit it.

    • Rhywun

      So?

      Also, the Basque might like a word.

      Also also, the research on “who got there first” is not nearly in, as far as I have heard.

      • Q Continuum

        Oikophobia.

      • leon

        “Also, the Basque might like a word.”

        I mean… Ok, but really at that point you might as well say no one is indigenous to Europe. They all came from Africa.

      • Rhywun

        Wikipedia seems to agree:

        Basques are indigenous to and primarily inhabit an area traditionally known as the Basque Country

        But yeah, as long as the BBC wants to give out sympathy points they could at least be accurate.

      • leon

        Sorry the point I did a bad job making it’s that the info Europeans have been in Europe for about 5000 years. Why they aren’t considered indigenous is a fluke of timeing. Otherwise we’d not know that they weren’t indigenous to Europe.

        So yes the Basque are indigenous but so are the English, Germans, Italians….

      • Rhywun

        ? Indigenous means “original”. It’s literally a contest to determine who got there first.

      • Rhywun

        PS. I’m assuming the Basques were more widespread before the later arrivals pushed them into their current region. Kinda like the Celts got pushed to the edges of Europe by the Romans and Germanic tribes.

      • leon

        Sure, but the Basque most likely moved in and pushed some other people out too. My point being we only know that the Indo-Europeans “pushed” out the others (debatable because it could have been integration and language spread” because the time that it occurred (~5000 years ago) was right around when language was solidifying into writing. The idea of saying Irish are not indigenous to Ireland is silly. It assumes that “colonial” expansion and the fall of cultures and languages only started when we started writing about it.

      • Rhywun

        Right but IIRC the theory is that nobody was there for the Basque to push out. Hence “indigenous”.

        But I’ll do more research before I bloviate any more on this topic 🙂

      • hayeksplosives

        I think the celts can make a good case too

      • Rhywun

        Wish I knew more. It’s a fascinating topic.

      • hayeksplosives

        If you are truly interested in the spread and migration of prehistoric peoples, I highly recommend “the Horse, the Wheel, and Language”

        Wonderful book. Lots of good research regarding the origins of the Indo-Europeans and the exchange of pottery methods and other fascinating cultural elbow rubbing.

      • Rhywun

        The “language” part peaks my interest. There’s a lot to learn about history there.

      • Rhywun

        Wish-listed. Thanks

      • hayeksplosives

        You will NOT be disappointed

      • Shirley Knott

        I’ll push again for 1177 BC: The Year Civilization Collapsed. It takes a Mediterranean Basin perspective but speaks to what is and isn’t known about the peoples inland. There were fairly robust trade routes as far as the Baltic and beyond.
        It’s well written and extremely well resourced.

      • hayeksplosives

        Duly noted!! Thanks

      • leon

        I’ll second, it’s a really good book, to get an understanding of the issues with identifying the origins of Indo-European.

    • Not Adahn

      “indigenous” = “noble savage” now I guess.

    • AlmightyJB

      Sounds like they had a good run then. Time for them to go.

  34. Count Potato

    “Samsung and LG go head to head with AI-powered fridges that recognize food

    Get ready for a smart fridge showdown at CES 2020, because Samsung and LG will both be unveiling fridges with added artificial intelligence capabilities this year. Samsung’s latest edition of its Family Hub refrigerator and LG’s second-generation InstaView ThinQ fridge both tout AI-equipped cameras that can identify food. The idea is that the cameras can scan what’s inside and let users know what items they’re short on, even making meal suggestions based on the ingredients they still have.”

    https://www.theverge.com/2020/1/2/21046822/samsung-lg-smart-fridge-family-hub-instaview-thinq-ai-ces-2020

    • Spudalicious

      My refrigerator is as dumb as a box of rocks and should last me many years. All it does is keep food cold and frozen. And it gives me ice and ice water.

    • Tundra

      Hard pass. Every subsequent generation of appliances sucks harder than the last.

    • Ted S.

      I prefer my dumb fridge, thank you very much.

    • Mojeaux

      Fridge: Yeah, hi, I’d like to talk to my owner’s account rep.

      Account Rep: Hi, Fridge Mojo. What do you have to report this month?

      Fridge: I’m full of beef, mayo, cheese, ham, sour cream, bacon, butter, turkey, sausage, and eggs. There is one head of lettuce and half a roma tomato.

      Account Rep: Uh huh. Uh huh. Can you see what’s in the cabinets? Bread box?

      Fridge: No, sorry.

      Account Rep: Okay, Fridge Mojo. Thank you. We’ll note this in their account. [… ] Looks like the Mojo Family needs their premiums raised by half again.

      Account Rep CubeMate: Fuck low-carbers, man. No wonder we’ve got climate change. Better call Greta.

      Account Rep: On it.

      • Rhywun

        Plus it screams “feed me broccoli and kale!” at you until you pull the plug.

      • Mojeaux

        That’s when you have to switch back to a wooden ice box and fetch ice every day.

      • Shirley Knott

        Worth it not to be nagged by the appliances.
        It is, after all, the question of who is to be in charge — we or the plumbing.

    • Spudalicious

      I think the croc had just gotten laid.

    • Rebel Scum

      Thicc

    • Rhywun

      I have a couple questions of my own.

    • Sean

      I have no questions.

      She can jostle my gator anytime.

      • hayeksplosives

        Blinks. Rubs eyes and re-reads.

        Yup, he wrote “jostle my gator”

      • Spudalicious

        I think “jostle my gator” has just been added to:

        Choke the chicken

        Polish the bishop

        Wax the dolphin

        Spank the monkey

        Punch the clown

      • Tundra

        Boxing the clown

        Cuffing the carrot

        Flogging the bishop

      • AlmightyJB

        The judges accept it.