The Night Shift for February 1, 2020

by | Feb 1, 2020 | Daily Links, Fun, Night Shift | 264 comments

Now that I’m finished with my holiday time off for the Winter, everything seems kind of…”meh”.  The incessant droning from the media about OrangeManBad, diseases, and people who I’ve never met up and dying, it’s a wonder I get out of bed sometimes.  Well, on to the Shift-posting; let’s see if there’s anything worth laughing over:

 

News you can use?  There’s a bit of “Hmmm…”, and a lot of “Nope!” in there.  But, I posted mainly because I like the British/Commonwealth pronunciation (you know what I mean).

So that’s how they afford living there!  This one is because of the picture.

The NAP notwithstanding, I’m starting to view the people sporting his merch the same way I view people wearing balaclavas in the Summer—as a very real threat to my life.

Apparently, obtaining customers is now bad for business.  Is this why many of the restaurants on DoorDash in my area don’t have customization?  I do think Jazz (::snickers::) is missing a point or two here.  That said, should restaurants really be closing off these customer avenues?

Twelve minutes of an awesome kitteh.  For those of you so inclined.

Minute and a half of an awesome human.  Question:  Do I go after him for possible infringement?  Nah—I’ll leave him to his work.

Something about this reminds me of The Band

Question(s) for our resident attorneys:  Are you aware of any attorneys who, as a part of their practice, sue the families of criminals who sue when their precious waste-of-space gets killed in self-defense?  Is that even a ‘thing’?  Do most defendants in these situations just accept the attorneys fees judgment (if that’s available to them) when the families, hopefully-lose the suit?  Is it common to just file a counter-suit against the plaintiff families in those situations?  If you have a story that fits this scenario, I’d love to hear it.

I was thinking I would forego music this week.  However, I realized I just had to dedicate a song to Festus.  I couldn’t rightly go with the original, as I don’t want to hear Olive Oyl sing.  You lot can supply any/all other music.

 

Alright; this oughta be enough to wrap up the week.  Spread the word about the Night Shift, get rested before-hand, and, let’s Make Late Night Great Again!  Huh…this sloganeering-acronyming is more difficult than I thought.  Oh, well—get cracking on the comments, y’all.

About The Author

Sir Digby Classic

Sir Digby Classic

My goal is to make every social interaction awkward.

264 Comments

  1. Spudalicious

    Fine. Here’s a comment. ;P

    • Lord Digby

      And, a fine comment it is. Much like that patio.

  2. Festus

    Whew… What’d I miss? Sorta shit-faced.

    • Lord Digby

      What’d you miss? a whole lotta nuthin’.

  3. mikey

    Third!

    • mikey

      The cat was cute. We had a three-legged cat. Wife worked as a vet tech and a customer brought in a cat with a crushed rear leg. Doc amputated the leg and sewed it real nice. Customer changed his mind – didnt want the his daughter to see a deformed cat. Wife brought it home. “Tripod” was a real sweet heart. The missing rear leg didn’t slow her down much. She was our third cat and they all slept with our son who used the top of a bunk be. She couldn’t make the jump and yowled to be lifted up. That and trying to scratch her ear with the missing leg were the only shortcomings.

      • Lord Digby

        Pritteh kitteh!

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Awww.

        My mom had a tripod kitty. Cute tabby but whiny and fat. It was missing a front leg which seems more difficult than missing a back one.

  4. Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

    ‘The food still winds up at the same destination and the restaurant is paid the same amount of money.’

    And this is why ticket scalping laws are bullshit.

    • Festus

      “Hey Kid, if you want in you need to pay for the sin!”

    • LCDR_Fish

      My buddy doesnt use doordash or Grubhub for his restaurant.

      I asked him about it a couple times –

      1. His sammiches (while amazing) don’t travel great (most of his takeout orders are for wings)

      2. They take a hefty % for the convenience – and he doesn’t consider it worth the extra coverage when he has such great customer outreach already via facebook, his car shows, etc.

      He did say that sometimes folks just show up to pick up orders because dd or gh listed his restaurant temporarily without asking/telling him – which is pretty dumb – but in those cases he doesn’t turn over the food unless they pay him.

  5. CPRM

    You missed the premiere of the cartoon last night Diggy. For shame.

    • Lord Digby

      Last I saw, you didn’t yet have the post date. That’s a mighty short turn-around time!

      In any event, my apologies. I wouldn’t have been any good, considering how long I was up yesterday.

      • CPRM

        Yeah, if SF hadn’t had a Suburu Horror Theater locked and loaded they might have run it wednesday, they treat me good in that respect, fitting the cartoons as soon as possible. Of course, I’m still looking forward to that day when they see fit to bestow me with full PTB status and let me schedule my own posts. Spud jumped the line when he joined. *spits on the ground*

      • Spudalicious

        Spud has teh connections. And no, I don’t have full access. TPTB jealously guard their powers.

      • Lord Digby

        spits on the ground

        Heheh…just like Mama pajama.

        Again, sorry I missed the post. 10 hours+ of sleep were a-callin’.

      • CPRM

        Nah, it’s just I felt like staying up later and no one came around (Chafed showed up after I tapped out)

      • Chafed

        You rang?

      • Lord Digby

        Damn, son–though you’d never get here!

        Now, it’s a party gathering.

      • CPRM

        No, just mentioned you. But still must have made the chafing burn.

    • MikeS

      Did you see my (very late) comment?

      • CPRM

        I did indeed. Decided to punish you for rooting against my beloved Packers. It’ll get fixed, with having some contract work this week, getting a new job and trying to get the cartoon done I overlooked it. Apologia.

      • MikeS

        Just busting your balls a bit. Keep up the good work, I really liked the last one. Bolton’s Mustache was a twist I didn’t see coming.

        And speaking of coming…*hairs stand on end*

  6. Lord Digby

    Don’t worry about all that super bowl shite. Watch the puppy bowl, and be happy.

  7. Festus

    Paralyzed Kitteh. Fuck OFF, Diggy. Fuck your sister too…

    • Lord Digby

      Aww…get something in your eye??

      He’s hell on wheels, that li’l kitteh.

    • Spudalicious

      Got any pics of his sister?

      • Lord Digby

        How’s this?

      • Spudalicious

        HAWT.

      • Lord Digby

        ? ??

      • hayeksplosives

        Y’all need Jesus.

      • Lord Digby

        He can take the wheel, walk with me/talk with me…whatever it takes.

        /Probably has a better emoji game, too.

  8. LemonGrenade

    Husband finally headed to bed. I had way too much caffeine plus alcohol. I’ll be up for awhile yet.

    • Festus

      A Gurl!

    • CPRM

      A/S/L babay?

    • LemonGrenade

      Seems there’s more than one unicorn in this group.

      • Mojeaux

        We have more than it seems because we all pop in and out at different times of the day. Toxteth O’Grady is a unicorn also.

      • Lord Digby

        Funny that the einhorns around here are actually neinhorns IYKWIM…

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Libertarian women exist; libertarian lesbians and mothers seem to be the real unicorns. In the latter category I can think of only Mojeaux and Lenore Skenazy.

      • hayeksplosives

        What is SP, chopped liver??

  9. Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

    You’re far more grey outside of your armor than I expected.

    • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

      Shite, comment 6.

    • Lord Digby

      Ehh…more sepia tones. I’ll get very grey if there’s stinky-ass food around.

      • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

        I hear certain pungent fungi will cause one to shed their clothes and prowl their neighbour’s property.

      • Lord Digby

        Well, I was thinking more pedestrian shit, such as kraut, or, parm.

        ?????

        That (and the green tones) aside, I wouldn’t mind hearing more about this miracle fungus…

      • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

        I thought you han no interest in being a naked intruder.

      • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

        …fuck it, let the typo stand. I’d like to see if we can get some puns out of it.

      • Lord Digby

        Oh, it wouldn’t be for my ingesting.

      • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

        *glances around nervously, gulps*

  10. Mustang

    That paralyzed kitteh…must adopt all the kittehs…

    • Lord Digby

      ‘STANG!! How ya doin’?

      • Mustang

        Doing great, just working and enjoying life.

        I love cats. I’ve always had a cat. My last cat was my best little friend. He always met me at the door and stayed near me at all times. He was always down to sit in my lap and get pets. He got sick and rapidly deteriorated late last year. He tried so hard not to show it and when I made the decision to put him down I wailed more than I thought I could. We recently came home with a new little kitten, a ragdoll breed. She’s beautiful and a ton of fun so it’s nice to have that back. I don’t mind being a crazy cat person.

      • LemonGrenade

        Sorry to hear about your last cat, and hope the new kitten keeps the family happy.

      • Lord Digby

        Yes; this, too, Mustang.

      • Lord Digby

        ragdoll breed

        Aaahhh! That’s what that is! My best friend has a cat like that, who is just visually stunning for a cat, and quite chill and sweet. Very easy -going.

        I’m not a cat-person, per se, but I think they can be awesome.

      • Mustang

        People are seriously stunned when they see her and she loves to greet them. Great pets.

      • hayeksplosives

        My big bro has a rag doll, a rescue one!! Majestic and lovely, with blue eyes. And he’s a total goofball.

        His name is Neville.

      • Lord Digby

        Majestic and lovely

        Such an odd breed name, but, this is accurate.

      • LemonGrenade

        I’ve had maine coons for the past 25+ years, but am considering a ragdoll. And you don’t become a crazy cat person until you have more than 2x cats than you have people in the house.

      • Mojeaux

        Man, I’m so sorry about your cat, but I’m glad you got another. I can’t stand for the house to have no kitty soul in it.

      • CPRM

        I can’t believe smokers were ousted from public life for the smell, but cat owners seem to be growing.

    • LemonGrenade

      I’m going to be looking for a new cat, soon. We had three, all over the age of eighteen. As of Friday morning, we now have one. I keep thinking on the positive side – once the last senior has shuffled off this mortal coil, we can replace the carpets, we’ll train the next one to travel, etc, but it still kinda sucks. The worst part of having pets.

      • Lord Digby

        Sorry, LG…I hope they went ‘well’, as it were, and that you ‘n’ yours are doing OK.

      • LemonGrenade

        Thanks. The fact that they were so damn old helped a lot. They all died of straight up old age, with the opportunity to just eat and sleep and chill out until they were done.

      • Lord Digby

        That is an awesome life for anyone.

      • Mojeaux

        Dang, that hurts, but it’s nice to know they had long lives.

        My suggestion is to get 2, preferably litter mates, but definitely ones who already know each other.

      • LemonGrenade

        We had a pair of litter mates my husband and I picked out ourselves before we were even married. We ended up rescuing litter mates from my youngest sister after a disastrous marriage. Both pairs were right around the same age, and they all lived past the average cat lifespan, so yeah, I think then next round will be a pair as well. I just have to convince my husband of the rightness of my plan.

      • Festus

        My older boys are peeing a lot lately and I know what that eventually means. My avatar is the biggest peeper and he’s the younger of the two. God help me I’m going to break a little when he goes away.

      • Lord Digby

        My older boys are peeing a lot lately

        Merry Christmas, 2020
        -The Festus Family

      • Mojeaux

        My older boys are peeing a lot lately and I know what that eventually means.

        Oh that sucks.

        Our old girl (14) couldn’t catch a decent breath and couldn’t get up on the bed anymore. She’d pretty much stopped eating and drinking. I think she had congestive heart failure, so we sent her over the Rainbow Bridge. I made the decision because Mr. Mojeaux was her human. He wanted to keep her around, but I couldn’t bear to hear her suffer and watch her turn away her favorite foods.

      • Lord Digby

        Oh….OH!

        I was making the joke of peeing teenagers mentioned in a yearly Christmas card. Didn’t know it meant….well, that for the cats.

      • Mojeaux

        Oh, yeah. Their kidneys start failing and they can’t make it to the litter box or they just dribble everywhere.

      • Festus

        Humor is hard online. That’s my boy and he’ll die just like every creature does. Just not now, not right fucking now.

      • CPRM
      • Rhywun

        Ow 🙁

        My pair are around 15 and a little frailer but otherwise healthy. Really not looking forward to what’s coming.

      • hayeksplosives

        My sympathies on the fur babies.

        We know when we get a pet that it’s very likely to die before we do*, but it’s still worth it to us, and particularly for them.

        *unless the pet is a parrot or Galapagos tortoise.

      • Lord Digby

        “or”??

  11. Festus

    You gave me a shout-out and a red-head. I’m needing a to pick a posey for you… Damn.

    • Festus

      I didn’t finish the posts and now I feel a right cunte…

    • Lord Digby

      We all need a.

      • Festus

        You’re a good egg, Diggy! I’d like to meet you sometime and play a round or shoot a game. Serious-like.

  12. Festus

    You’re a good egg, Diggy! I’d like to meet you sometime and play a round or shoot a game. Serious-like.

    • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

      He really means it, Digs.

      • Lord Digby

        So nice, he posted twice!

        Ditto, Festus. Although, I have no idea which “round” is up for grabs, and I don’t really hunt….

      • Spudalicious

        Nowhere in his post did I read anything about you doing the hunting.

      • Lord Digby

        Uh, shooting game?? Hello?

        *eyeroll*

      • Chafed

        I just assumed Festus would hunt you.

      • Lord Digby

        Damn….

      • hayeksplosives

        The Most Dangerous Game.

      • Lord Digby

        Well, I do plan on making it difficult…

        ::hides neon yellow hoodie::

        Also, Neville is an awesome name for your…cat-phew

      • Lord Digby

        Speaking of “game”, allow me to offer up the following:
        https://www.pureandnaturalspices.com/

        For spice needs, although I can’t guarantee too many exotic/hard-to-find spices. Hayeks, if memory serves, you apparently use a lot of Indian spices…? Can’t say I’ve seen that much in the way of Ifdian spices/blends (that I can recall).

        Anyway, I do recommend them as a possible source, especially if you need low/no sodium seasonings. They also do sales fairly frequently.

    • Festus

      Twice the love!

  13. MikeS

    I’m out. See you kids tomorrow.

    Go ‘Niners.

    Joe Montana was the greatest player to ever wear a Chiefs uniform

    People who wear their seatbelts are stupid.

    Pineapple is delicious on literally everything other than pizza.

    Mia (NSFW)

    Music

    • Lord Digby

      G’night, Mike!

    • CPRM

      Joe Montana was the greatest player to ever wear a Chiefs uniform

      Ehem.

      • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

        Greatest sideline pic ever, but I grew up worshiping Derrick Thomas. In his prime, he could singlehandliy terrorize an entire offense on almost every snap.

      • Mojeaux

        Yeah, so I was writing book #whatever during the Derrick Thomas years and I gave him a shout-out. If I rehab that book and publish it, it will DEFINITELY keep that Thomas shout-out.

        Somebody gave my husband a Thomas jersey years ago and he was like, “Okay, whatever.” I was like, WTF THAT IS DERRICK THOMAS THERE IS NO OKAYWHATEVER!!!

      • CPRM

        Derrick Thomas is sadly unremembered by most general NFL fans. Great player and by all accounts a great guy. That was during my ‘heyday’ of NFL fanship, when I knew all the great players from every team.

      • Mojeaux

        He is remembered and beloved ’round these here parts.

      • Lord Digby

        I have no idea who he is. Then again, not even a casual fan.

      • CPRM

        (outside?) Linebacker for the Chiefs during Marty Ball. Always competitors, but never able to win the big game, same as Marty Ball anywhere. Sad thing is, everywhere along that path the higher ups thought Marty was the problem, and if they just got rid of him they could finally win a championship, but instead damned their franchise to at least a decade of obscurity.

      • Lord Digby

        Marty Ball

        Ummm…..

        /Do I need to say it?

      • CPRM

        Do I need to say it?

        apparently you do.

      • Lord Digby

        Have no idea who Marty Ball is.

      • CPRM

        Their coach at the time was Marty Schottenheimer. For 30 years he took teams to threshold of winning the Super Bowl, but always failed to make it. They all fired him and spent decades without even having a winning season, until I thinks San Diego, I think they only had a half a decade of not getting to playoffs, but still haven’t won a Superbowl.

      • Lord Digby

        Well, I definitely know who Linus and Colm are. So, I have that going for me.

      • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

        Most sacks in a single game.
        Second most sacks in a single game.
        Perfected the strip sack.

        Admittedly not a great run defender, but an underrated coverage linebacker.

        I used to kinda want to see the Chiefs offense get off the feild just so I could watch him play.

        Now, Tyrann Mathieu is my favorite guy to watch on defense. The dude is freaking everywhere, blowing shit up. Really fun to watch.

      • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

        It’s officially Superbowl Sunday, Mo!

        *squeals like a schoolgirl*

      • Mojeaux

        w00000 h000000!!!!

        My husband’s so psyched. I already got party food even though we’re not actually having a party. Just him and me watching and shouting at the TV.

    • Trigger Hippie: Hair Jizz

      /tosses bombs, exits stage left

      That’s how you shitlord.

    • Spudalicious

      ‘night, Mike!

      • Festus

        Same!

  14. Festus

    Twice the love!

    • Festus

      Thrice for all the rest of you out there.

      • Lord Digby

        Well, I was once known as the Thrice-endowed, Supreme Donkey of the Trouser-pod…

        I really just went by Trouser-pod, though.

      • Festus

        Trouser-pod to my friends.

      • Lord Digby

        But, I got no friends…

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Yes ,i had a mullet, and he had a Porn ‘stache

      • Fatty Bolger

        lol

        I didn’t have a mullet or porn stache, but I did play the saxaphone.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I don’t know a where he came in,,

      • Lord Digby

        Hey, it worked for them; it worked for you. No shame in that 80’s game.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        We were known, “here comes Hall and Oats”

      • Festus

        Toronto tuxes, rugby shirts and hiking boots. Everyone wore the same damn runners though. Nike All Courts.

    • mikey

      good read. My son and his wife went all over the Vegas area and bought up a couple hundred pachages of the masks and shipped the the the SIL’s family in China. Don’t know yet if they actualy made it there.

      • Rhywun

        Good until it pussies out at the end.

        it’s immoral to award the drug to the highest bidders

        ORLY? Then how do you choose? You don’t know who “deserves” it more.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I liked his first book Emperor of Ocean Park. Have, but haven’t gotten into New England White.

    • hayeksplosives

      I bought a box of those blue disposable ones a few months back when I had stitches in my lip but wanted to get back to work. (Comically duck-lipped).

      Box is almost full. Perhaps I’ll look at eBay…

      • Lord Digby

        Ebay, yes! Hell, I have a couple of heavy-ish duty disposable masks from Home Depot that I’ve never used…

  15. Mojeaux

    That is a mighty fine cover of that song, although I don’t know what’s wrong with the original.

    Here, have another oldie but goodie: https://youtu.be/Ry5GHJifMWY

    • LemonGrenade

      To go immediately off-topic, I’m 62% through Dunham and I take back everything I said about honesty and being upfront with your partner. I’m still enjoying it greatly, though, and intend to grab the next in the series. At least the deception in your story has been thoroughly entertaining, although there were a few times where I found myself yelling, “idiot! Just tell them!”

      • Mojeaux

        LOL! Heh, I knew you’d recant.

        You realize Celia’s just plain ol’ worn out and starving, right?

        I had to catch myself before I hit POST to calculate about where you are in the story so I wouldn’t spoil something.

      • LemonGrenade

        Glad you haven’t delivered any spoilers, I’ve been enjoying reading it. I’ll probably finish the rest tomorrow, and promise to be honest in my reaction, but really, I can’t imagine delivering a bad review unless you finish the book by slaughtering the main characters before they reach their final destination.

      • Mojeaux

        That is one thing I will NEVER do.

        I’m a romance writer first and foremost. Happy-ever-afters are my stock in trade and I will not deviate from that.

      • LemonGrenade

        The world needs more happy endings (pun intended) so I fully support that mission.

      • Mojeaux

        Book #1, my Hamlet riff. Hamlet dies, Claudius dies, Gertrude dies.

        Horatio almost dies.

        Ophelia doesn’t.

        And yet…somehow there’s an HEA. 😉

        Cold is your friend.

    • Lord Digby

      The original sounded like Olive Oyl riding a sybian, and, not in a good way.

      Then again, I never had published, charting songs, so…

  16. mikey

    Signing of with the National Anthem.
    Or what the anthem should be. The definitive version.

    https://youtu.be/xjd5BRwUdlk

  17. Charles Easterly

    “Nobel Laureate in Economics, F.A. Hayek said in 1974 about Hazlitt’s book: ‘It is a brilliant performance. It says precisely the things which need most saying and says them with rare courage and integrity. I know of no other modern book from which the intelligent layman can learn so much about the basic truths of economics in so short a time.'”

    This is a

    https://www.libertarianism.org/people/frederic-bastiat

    • Charles Easterly

      The Information beyond the links I have provided may prove useful.

    • hayeksplosives

      Bastiat was an astute observer and an excellent writer.

      I love his works.

      Who will take the mantle from Sowell when he shuffles off this mortal coil?

      • Lord Digby

        Sugar.

        Free.

  18. Mustang

    I’m currently reading “The Framers Coup” and it’s really interesting to get a non-ideological view of how the Constitution came to be and how it’s really a large grouping of compromises. While they were undoubtedly intelligent men, it’s really eye-opening to read the very human arguments that the Founders had. It’s been the most eye-opening reading about how the issue of slavery was dealt with. Highly recommend if you have any interest in the subject.

    • Akira

      I’ll add that one to the list.

      I’m going to make it a project to read the entire Constitution, related documents, and modern commentary on it. In other words, I want to actually become the Constitutional scholar that Obama pretended to be.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        18 pages, not to difficult

      • Mustang

        It’s a good-sized tome but I like that the arguments are presented without any sort of pretense. You see the delegates as they really were…aristocrats, politicians, human beings…not what left or right wants to portray them as. It really puts the Constitution into a different, more accurate, light.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Have you checked out NR’s Constitutionally Speaking podcast? I confess I haven’t started it. 53 episodes so far.

      • Akira

        Thanks, I’ll add that to my Stitcher playlist!

    • straffinrun

      Sounds like a good recommendation. Tom Woods is always talking about the subversive nature of the Kentucky Resolutions and will add that to my list, too.

  19. Yusef drives a Kia

    PSA: the wife has MRDO, which is worse than mrsa, not good,antibiotic resistant shit, and Vegas is full of Chinee, I’m in Moomsuit mode to see Wendy, kind of spooky,

    • Lord Digby

      Yeeesh! Sorry, Bob. I hope she’s in good hands.

    • CPRM

      I’ve known several people who got MRSA and lived long after. These things get over-hyped. The hook will catch the wire my friend.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I was told MRDO, is like, don’t even touch her bad, and honestly, I don’t need that, I don’t even want to be near Vegas, I’m not healthy enough for that shit..

      • CPRM

        If you don’t feel you’re healthy enough, and she is in a state she can have phone conversations, don’t risk it. But if that’s not the case, don’t let them scare you off from being something could encourage her to keep going. Regrets are the hardest thing to deal with.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Intubated, no Convo, she hears me,

      • Spudalicious

        Damn.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Yusef, if you don’t mind my asking, about how much does it cost to travel to Vegas?

        Hugs to you.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        37$ round trip, not counting Coffee, it adds up, so I go every other day or three

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I have a paypal

    • Mojeaux

      {{{Yusef}}}

      The infectious disease docs will be all over it.

      Prayers and good vibes.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        They are, but her kidneys cant keep up, and she cant breathe without help,
        Crap,

      • Festus

        Sorry about that, I was trying to twist Diggy’s tail and missed… All the best to Wendy!

    • Spudalicious

      Just watched it twice. I feel your pain, Bob.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Spud, you have been a great help, I thank you,

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        I know a really depressing tune if you find that cathartic, but I don’t want to sadden you further. Let me know.

    • Lord Digby

      Now, why’n the world would I have picked that?? That has nothing to do with harems…

      /alright; maybe it does a teeny, tiny bit

      • Festus

        “Into my room, he creeps”

      • Lord Digby

        *exasperated sigh*

        i keep telling you: I’m NOT a naked intruder!!

        Gosh!!

      • Festus

        You get me.

  20. Yusef drives a Kia

    But, my Bella is sleeping at my back, and Kittah is on the arm of my chair,
    I am Loved

    • Festus

      I gotta tell ya Bob, most times my Wifey treats me like a big, doofy dog that don’t know whether to shit or go blind. You’re doing fine and everyone here loves you at least a little. Babies too.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        i’m way over kids of all sorts, My Gkids are ok, barely, the Girls are adorable of course

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        And there’s my little Twin Deegan,11 now, and wants to do everything i do, why i moved here,Going to golf tomorrow, then liunch, then more golf,
        I’m not dead yet!

      • Festus

        Go do that. It’s hard as shit but do that. Moping never solved anything.

      • Festus

        Go do that. It’s hard as shit but do that. Moping never solved anything.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Festus, you are quite the Jimmy Two Times! 😉 Wonder what hiccup is going on at your end.

      • Festus

        Might be the Grandpa sweater, might be the Werthers. I don’t know.

    • C. Anacreon

      Wow, already seems like a very un-PC bit. Amazing how much has changed in a few short years.

      • CPRM

        a few short years.

        Sadly, as the calendar insists on reminding me, it’s over 20 years.

      • Mojeaux

        Oh please. 1996 was only like 3 years ago.

      • CPRM

        By my count time turned triple speed since 2014 when my dad died. Everything before then had a nice constant pace, since then it’s all yesterday.

      • Rhywun

        time turned triple speed since 2014

        For me that started around 2005.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        That was a long time ago, scary eh?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I had a full head of Bright Red hair then, now it’s all see through……

      • Festus

        Curly locks down to my mid back. Shirley Temple-like. Now I rock the shaven head.

      • C. Anacreon

        No kidding. 20 years.
        I keep forgetting to tell myself I’m old. Stuff from long ago seems like yesterday.

      • Festus

        1996? I started being a kid again. Glibertarian without knowing the meaning. I had my mid-life crisis when I turned 30.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Ditto.

        I was in a pissy maudlin mood today and was thinking, after paying a nickel for shitty paper bag with a handle that tore and got soaked in the rain, I’d trade today for twenty years ago. Have to give up retail pot, gay marriage, and you guys, but other than that, I’m not sure things haven’t slid backwards.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Glad someone else misses the late 20C as much as I do. I’d prefer freedom and privacy to convenience.

      • Gustave Lytton

        And get the Twin Towers back.

        Was watching Moonstruck last night. Got a little dust in the eye seeing those standing there forever.

      • CPRM

        To be honest, I never gave a shit about the twin towers. That it was an attack on a purely civilian target by an enemy we were not actually actively at war with was what bothered me. And fuck those fuckers for using that as an excuse to declare war on that behalf against those that weren’t involved. I was for the war in Iraq, I’ll admit my folly. I also believe what I was told by those on who were there, that there were ‘WMD’s there, but they were passed into the hands of Iran. Just a cluster fuck.

      • Festus

        Yep. When that happened all I wanted to do was bash and smash and bust and bash and crash and trash and burn. No trouble to be saying that trouble’s happening everyday.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I didn’t care about WTC before, and during/after. It’s just now they remind me of what use to be, before the twin goat screws, before the “Patriot” Act, and before thousands more of Americans dead including several I knew.

        My grandpa was stationed at Pearl Harbor but left a few months before Dec 7 to go to a gunnery school or something. I wish I could ask him now about what it was like to go back after the war or later when it became a tourist destination and remember what it was before.

      • cyto

        I gotta agree….

        Remember shows like “Hogan’s Heroes”? We used to lampoon totalitarian societies with things like “Giff me your papers!!”, demonstrating the superiority of the US where you did not have to present identity papers in order to move from place to place inside the country.

        Fast forward to post 9-11….

        Not only do we put up with presenting ID all over the place, we tolerate being naked-scanned and having our giblets fondled at the airport. We even voluntarily carry tracking devices that follow us around 24/7 and are under the watchful eye of surveillance cameras most of the time.

        I think if you teleported most people from the 70’s to today’s america they would learn of this stuff and punch you right in the face for being such a puss.

  21. C. Anacreon

    It’s weird that the 49ers are in the Super Bowl, but the Bay Area hasn’t been very nuts about it. Not like when the Giants were in the World Series, for example. Maybe it’s because they moved their stadium to the San Jose area.

    • Festus

      I lack the link-fu but National Lampoon has you covered.

  22. Festus

    Hey Diggy! I actually listened to the entire tune and it’s a really solid soft jazz song. I must have heard it at least a hundred times growing up. How did you know? ::SF nib growing::

    • Lord Digby

      Uhhh….’cause I’m good like that.

      Yeah, that’s about right.

  23. C. Anacreon

    I have yet to be somewhere in the past two weeks where someone asked me, “Hey, how about those Niners?”

    • C. Anacreon

      I’m pulling for the Chiefs anyway. Probably will be the only one doing so at the SB party tomorrow though.

      • Chafed

        That should keep it interesting.

      • C. Anacreon

        Well, today my wife convinced the guy hosting the Super Bowl party that we should do it at our house instead. So if they don’t like me backing the Chiefs they’re free to leave. I don’t think they’ll leave though. Probably just taunt me every time the Niners do something good.

      • CPRM

        Make sure you’re packing heat in case the Chiefs do win, I know you have you’re disabilities, make sure your equaled by Sam Colt.

    • Rhywun

      The madness is stronger in some towns than others. You can’t walk five feet in Buffalo during the season without hearing the equivalent.

      • Chafed

        What else is there to do in Buffalo?

      • Rhywun

        Spend money because it’s so cheap to live there?

    • CPRM

      Yeah. People still talk daily about the last time the Packers won a SB in 2011, and in Minnysoda they still talk about when they almost did 40 years ago.

      • dbleagle

        If #12 was better than 1-3 in the NFC Championship the Packers would easily have at least two more Lombardi’s

      • CPRM

        This was the first won HE lost. Hopefully he isn’t over the hill after those collar bone injuries. But it seems so.

      • dbleagle

        But the Packers are stuck with him for a few years. I hope they get things together for another run next season. Most of the pieces are in place, but you are right, the offense just doesn’t click like it did.

      • CPRM

        I don’t see it as being ‘stuck’ with him. He has the skill set, he was off this year, has been for a few years; but he isn’t exactly a dime a dozen QB. Sadly, as he’s the same age as me, he has only about 4 years left. He’s as old now as Favre was when he took over. Favre and Brady showed their can be more left in the tank. But it’s a matter of getting him back to what he is good at. He thrived in McCarthies fast paced offense where you take a drop and throw. He got famous for the long passes, but he was better at the underneath stuff. Farve was good at ‘Go big or Go Home’, while Rogers thrived under a timing offense. Rogers seems to have bought into his own legend that never was.

  24. Chafed

    SD I have never heard of the family of a dead criminal getting sued.

    • Lord Digby

      Interesting.

  25. straffinrun

    First time to hear that song. Pleasant voice.

  26. straffinrun

    At the kid’s electone lesson. One of the school’s staff tells me that there’s her recital has been moved up an hour next week. “I wish you would’ve told me that earlier. Now I have to juggle my schedule to make it.” The staff lady says, “Sorry about that. The other lady was supposed to tell you about the change 2 weeks ago but she is scared of talking to foreigners.” WTF?!

    • C. Anacreon

      What is an electone?

      • CPRM

        C. Did you see Yusef’s post about what thing they say Wendy has now, any thoughts on that?

      • Lord Digby

        Damn, that shouldn’t have been able to elicit goosebumps, but…here we are.

      • straffinrun

        My kid isn’t that good. She does a decent “Don’t Go Breakin’ My Heart”.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Could have been Achy Breaky Heart. Dodged a bullet there.

      • Lord Digby

        Heh

    • CPRM

      You are Gulliver, they fear you may eat Lilliputians.

      • straffinrun

        They can’t keep me down, Man.

      • CPRM

        I know that, I saw the cartoon Without Rotoscoping Their’d be no hat and hair.

      • Lord Digby

        This is probably the right explanation.

      • Festus

        Hearty larf!

    • Toxteth O’Grady

      “Moose out front shoulda told ya.”

  27. Cacciatore

    Long time no Night Shift for me. Sad!

    Late to the party but checking in anyhow.

    • CPRM

      You’re welcome, as long as you aren’t looking to pick a fight.

      • Cacciatore

    • Lord Digby

      Dang, Cacc–I was just wondering yesterday if you were still around!

      And, of course, pretty much all the other regs have buggered off.

      Straff–you still out there? Anyone?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Still here. Sort of. Night glass is starting to kick in.

      • Lord Digby

        “Night glass”? Beverages?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Yep

      • Lord Digby
      • Lord Digby

        Note to self: Don’t try to copy/paste emojis.

        ::thumbs up::

      • Cacciatore

        I lurk always! Never fear!

      • Lord Digby

        Well….see that you do!

      • straffinrun

        Kind of. Work in the morning, take to kid music lesson in the afternoon and now I’m on laundry and cooking dinner. I’m def not working for the weekend.

      • Lord Digby

        Ugh. Fist bump for ya.

        /Getting laundry done, too

  28. CPRM

    Ok. I apologize, it seems I may not be superhuman. My body is demanding acquiesce to alcohol poisoning and die sleep.

  29. Festus

    Checking out now now, need some sleep sleep. G’night Glibs! Happy dreams dreams!

  30. Cacciatore

    I’ve been working 50hrs or more a week. Can’t complain about the paychecks, but can only glib here and there as a consequence.

    Always checking in…thanks to you delightful rascals with the time to keep the dream alive!

    • Lord Digby

      Damn, 50+ is Capital R Rough. Kudos to you.

  31. l0b0t

    Good morning you wonderful people. I hope today is fantastic and frabjulous for everyone.

    • Lord Digby

      As long as I sleep well, it should be at least OK.

    • Ted S.

      I’m sure Rhywun is quite nervous if he’s up.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Today is damp and cold. Unfortunately Brexit can’t fix the weather.

  32. JD is Unemployed

    I forgot to post this the other day. Something about waiting for the morning links to come around but then getting distracted. Stupid is and stupid does, or something.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Also check out the pair on Rico. He seems to be swinging a little harder these days. Good on him.

  33. UnCivilServant

    I woke up and almost panicked because I thought it was monday and I was late for work.

    • straffinrun

      You’re fine. It’s Tuesday.

  34. Tres Cool

    I need to make some abrupt lifestyle changes, cause it seems like every Sunday morning I type the same thing here: “pickle juice STAT!”
    Church is gonna be rough.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Electrolytes can help you persevere through a rigorous church service. How many calories do you burn per sermon?