Thursday Afternoon Links

by | Feb 13, 2020 | Daily Links | 404 comments

Happy Thursday, everybody. My spousal unit kept the kids home from school today so that she could take them to pick up her mother from the airport, and then they were going to Busch Gardens. Judging by the pure crazy of the two about 9:30am, I will hear stories of woe and disaster that start with, “YOUR sons…” Somehow they’re always my sons when they are being terrorists. Other than that, its been another beautiful day. Also we are making copycat KFC bowls for dinner. Its not healthy, but its delicious. I wonder, at what point did I get cheap enough to make copycat versions of something I can just go order 5 of for like, $20?

I love to hate everyone involved with this.

The Hat and Hair are probably involved with this.

Venomous Snot Blobs — band name or album?

Can I tell you how excited I am that politics has devolved into a name-calling contest? These must be our best and brightest!

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

404 Comments

  1. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Trump and his allies have repeatedly made unfounded and false claims to allege that the Bidens acted corruptly in Ukraine.

    They keep saying that.

    The standard of evidence for Dems appears to be much higher than it is for anyone else.

    • Count Potato

      Great minds drink alike?

    • UnCivilServant

      Of course it is. Out and out public confessions of misdeeds are note foundations for saying they did something.

      • Q Continuum

        ^^^

        There’s a fucking video of Gropey Joe giving a blow-by-blow.

        DNC operatives with bylines.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Also, to some extent, Kelly is talking out of his ass because he wasn’t there when everything went down.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      They need to change that to illegally. As RC Dean has pointed out it’s entirely possible that what they did, while unethical as hell, may not be illegal under our current law.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I actually don’t doubt that it was legal. They built the system so that they could fleece it.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        +83000

    • Naptown Bill

      Without double standards they’d have none at all, etc.

      In high school I had to do a debate team thing for a class and it frustrated me to the point of violence that the other team’s rebuttal would be to just say their thing over again as if we hadn’t shot holes through their argument and then just deny anything they couldn’t ignore. I had no idea that was what actual “debate” is about. Silly me, I thought it involved actual argumentation, rationality, intellectual accountability, that sort of thing.

      • peachy rex

        The debate style I learned overseas actually involved rhetoric and logic. Imagine my horror the first time I witnessed a US style “debate” competition.

    • Playa Manhattan

      You should see the NYT article on Jussie Smollet. If you didn’t know about the case, you’d end up with the impression that he was actually attacked.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I don’t need a rage headache.

      • Fourscore

        He was attacked! I saw the noose around his neck on the internet ! It was dark so he couldn’t tell if the two Nigerians were black or white.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      “unfounded and false claims to allege that the Bidens acted corruptly in Ukraine”

      Now THAT’S how you do fake news.

    • Chipwooder

      So Hunter Biden was totes qualified for that $50K per month Burisma job, eh?

      • Fourscore

        Yes, that and more, he was a veteran after all.

      • R C Dean

        More like $80K/month.

    • R C Dean

      “When subpoenaed by Congress in the House impeachment hearings, Vindman complied and told the truth.”

      “He did exactly what we teach them to do from cradle to grave,” he said, according to the magazine. “He went and told his boss what he just heard.”

      His boss was Trump, not Congress. So, he didn’t tell his boss his concerns at all. Instead, he went outside the chain of command. Is that what you taught your Marines, Kelly? Fuck the chain of command, and go cry to civilians when you have a problem?

      Kelly said that when Vindman heard Trump tell Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky that he wanted the country to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden and his son, Hunter,

      I thought Vindman wasn’t on the call, but heard about it second or third hand. Could be wrong on this.

      Kelly said that when Vindman heard Trump tell Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky that he wanted the country to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden and his son, Hunter, the ask was for the aide “tantamount to hearing ‘an illegal order,'”

      “We teach them, ‘Don’t follow an illegal order. And if you’re ever given one, you’ll raise it to whoever gives it to you that this is an illegal order, and then tell your boss,'” Kelly said, according to the magazine.

      Trump didn’t order anyone to do anything on that call. If Vindman thought Trump had given him an illegal order, the only proper thing for him to do, given that there is no one above Trump on the chain of command to report it to, was resign.

      What a steaming pile of swamp garbage. Now wonder Trump fired him.

  2. Count Potato

    “Kelly said that when Vindman heard Trump tell Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky that he wanted the country to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden and his son, Hunter, the ask was for the aide “tantamount to hearing ‘an illegal order,'” The Atlantic reported. Trump and his allies have repeatedly made unfounded and false claims to allege that the Bidens acted corruptly in Ukraine.”

    Unfounded and false, Urkel?

    • invisible finger

      I’m pretty sure the claim is they acted corruptly in DC.

    • Ted S.

      Vindman said he heard Trump say this. Whether or not Trump really did….

      • leon

        Not even that. Vindman never had even talked to Trump. He never made the claim to have heard that IIRC. He said he thought Trump had said that by hearing one half of a conversation.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Hat & Hair rejoices!

  3. Q Continuum

    Hope Hicks’ new title: Secretary of Pole Dancing.

    • Chafed

      I assume we will once again get photos of the hot model the internet confuses with Hope Hicks.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s Skeletor with tits.

      • Naptown Bill

        I dated a girl like that once. 6’1″, skinny as hell, did some modeling. It was like trying to play with a whippet; you’re both game, and it’s certainly a handsome dog, but, Jesus, man, you can feel its ribs! It’s gonna snap an ankle if it tries to make a hard turn on the hardwood!

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The politics of feeling good?

  4. Rebel Scum

    Former White House chief of staff John Kelly said Wednesday that Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman, a key witness in President Donald Trump’s impeachment inquiry, was right to raise concerns about Trump’s July call to Ukraine’s president, The Atlantic reported.

    There is a reason you are the former chief of staff.

  5. Playa Manhattan

    I’m going….. to…….. Duff Gardens!!!

    • Juvenile Bluster

      Put the sandwich down.

      • Playa Manhattan

        I’d like to be alone with the sandwich for a moment.

    • C. Anacreon

      “Hooray!” (falls face forward into car horn)

      Put the sandwich down? (to sandwich) “Oh, I could never be mad at you.”

      One of the best-ever episodes.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        It’s in my Top 5 for sure.

        In no particular order: Duff Gardens, 22 Short Films About Springfield (Aurora Borealis? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your kitchen?), Homer Badman (2-4-6-8 Homer’s crime was really great! Great meaning large or immense, we use it in the pejorative sense!), Cape Feare (aaaaaah, the Thompsons!), Last Exit to Springfield (It was the best of times, it was the BLURST of times? You stupid monkey!)

      • Playa Manhattan

        When I say hello Mr. Thompson and press down on your foot, you just smile and nod.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        I think he’s talking to you.

      • Count Potato

        Wow, you even remember the names of the episodes.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Actually, I missed the name of the Duff Garden’s episode (it’s “Selma’s Choice”). But yeah, I know pretty much all of Seasons 2-8 by heart.

      • l0b0t

        Don’t forget King Size Homer. “I heard your dad went into a restaurant and ate all the food in the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant.”

      • Chipwooder

        Well, JB, I gotta hand it to you – you steam a good ham

      • Bill Door

        Nice list. All of them are awesome. The Simpsons Spinoff Showcase is another that really knocks on spinoffs, plus Troy McClure is possibly one of the greatest characters in the show (really any of Phil Hartman’s characters).

      • Ted S.

        “Works on contingency? No, money down!”

      • Bill Door

        You might recognize me from such driver safety videos as “Alice’s Adventure Through the Windshield Glass” and “The Decapitation of Lead-foot Larry”

      • Playa Manhattan

        Firecrackers, the silent killers.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        There’s a group of probably like 15 or 20 episodes I’d put in a tier just below my top 5. That’s one of them.

      • Bill Door

        For sure.

        I was just thinking Marge Vs the Monorail is another great one (I call the big one Bitey!).

      • Playa Manhattan

        I still think Lisa the Vegetarian is the best 22 minutes in the history of TV.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Fun fact about that one: Paul McCartney agreed to be a guest star only if they agreed to permanently make Lisa a vegetarian (instead of it being just for the episode and ignored afterwards).

      • Rhywun

        “Gee Mr. McClure, I was a Grade-A moron for ever questioning meat!”

        “Yes you were, Jimmy. Yes you were.”

        “Ouch, you’re hurting me.”

        LOLOLOL

      • Playa Manhattan

        That filmstrip alone had about 10 different classic lines.

        “If a cow ever got the chance, he’d eat you and everyone you care about!”

        “C’mon Jimmy, lets take a peek at the killing floor”
        *GASP
        “Don’t let the name throw you, Jimmy. It’s not really a floor; it’s more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice through so it can be collected and exported.”

        “Just ask this scientician.”
        “Ahh…”

      • Ted S.

        I think my favorite filmstrip is the “imagine a world without zinc” one.

      • Bill Door

        “Yes, the Simpsons have come a long way since an old drunk made humans out of his rabbit characters to pay off his gambling debts. Who knows what adventures they’ll have between now and when the show becomes unprofitable?”

        Had to look that one up, but good, nonetheless.

      • Gdragon

        I never miss “You Only Move Twice” (Scorpio!) when it’s on. “Bart After Dark” (burlesque house) is another favourite.

      • Bill Door

        Hank Scorpio’s theme song is one of my favorites: “His twisted two obsessions are his plot to rule the world and his employee’s health. He welcomes you into his lair, like a nobleman welcomes his guest, with free dental care and a stock plan that helps you invest.”

        That is a great episode!

  6. Juvenile Bluster

    I’m about to mute every word remotely associated with politics from my Twitter timeline until November 4. That way I still get to enjoy the post-election freakout.

    Meanwhile, got my medical marijuana card. Going to the dispensary tomorrow. Will be posting high this weekend.

    • Tonio

      Good on you.

      Virginia almost decriminalizes MJ.

      • Chipwooder

        One tiny ray of sunshine through the hurricane clouds, I see.

    • Count Potato

      Go you!

    • LemonGrenade

      Sweet! Hope you like being high as much as I do.

  7. Rebel Scum

    Hope Hicks returning to White House after 2-year hiatus

    A decision that I can certainly get behind.

  8. Count Potato

    “The jellyfish deploy cellular bombs armed with stinging cells called nematocytes, according to their study. Those bombs release a skin-irritating venom when they make contact with a passing swimmer.”

    geese of the sea

    • C. Anacreon

      Venomous snot blobs running down his nose!

      /Aqualung

      • Tonio

        Eying little girls with bad intent?

      • Chafed

        He’s horning in on OMWC.

  9. hayeksplosives

    Man, I should have taken psychology courses in college. Listening to people’s woes and helping them cope or find solutions to their problems constitutes the bulk of my working day sometimes.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Start giving bad advice. That will make it stop.

      • hayeksplosives

        Unfortunately I am burdened b n actual desire to help people.

        I haven’t gone full cynical yet.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I don’t think you go cynical. Most people vacillate between being helpful and being cynical over time. Cyclical Cynicism if you will.

      • Jarflax

        You can do both, try to help while knowing it won’t work. It’s how God handles things.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      That’s because you were assigned female at birth.

      Us lucky dudes just get to say “Sorry bro, that sucks. Want a beer?”

      • hayeksplosives

        You probably have a point there.

        Dang nurturing instinct!

        Probably exacerbated by my never giving birth so I have taken in stride the need for caring for others, such as step kids, nieces and nephews etc. extends to coworkers and now staff and even upper management.

        On the other hand, my staff is fiercely loyal to me as a result of knowing I have their backs.

      • Chipwooder

        Or just shrug and say “Well, whaddya gonna do”

      • Pope Jimbo

        “Suck it up buttercup”

    • Ted S.

      I always thought you solved problems by blowing shit up.

      • hayeksplosives

        I should do that more often. Instead I’m at a restaurant having a martini before I go back to work.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        And the chant begins:

        “BLOW SHIT UP!  BLOW SHIT UP!  BLOW SHIT UP!

        Release your inner Mythbuster.

  10. Q Continuum

    “He reminds me of a tiny version of Jeb ‘Low Energy’ Bush, but Jeb has more political skill and has treated the Black community much better than Mini!”

    Best. Timeline.

    • hayeksplosives

      I saw a Facebook reminder from 2017 in which I’d typed “if present day me went back in time 5 years and told me ‘President Donald Trump was being sued by a woman legally named Reality Winner’, I’d have said ‘Go home, future. You’re drunk.’“

      It’s indeed the best timeline.

  11. Ted S.

    Can I tell you how excited I am that politics has devolved into a name-calling contest?

    You’re excited that they use ad-blocker blockers?

  12. The Late P Brooks

    The standard of evidence for Dems appears to be much higher than it is for anyone else.

    Those who control the chocolate ration control history.

  13. Playa Manhattan

    It’s beginning to come out that all of Bloomberg’s support is bought and paid for. He doesn’t have a single supporter that he isn’t also donating to.

    • Tonio

      Astroturf.

      • Chafed

        It looks that way. I’m wondering if getting into the Democratic debates will help or hurt him.

    • CPRM

      Isn’t that true of them all?

      • Drake

        Bernie has true believers – although many believe they’ll be paid off when he wins and raids the Treasury.

        Bloomberg is talking about spending money at a rate nobody has ever seen – in the $2 Billion range for this year.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Hillary must be shitting bricks about that. He could have been spending it on her in 2016.

      • Tonio

        I’d say the Bernie Bros’ fantasy also involves “making the rich pay their fare share.”

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        “Raids the Treasury”

        You get an IOU and you get an IOU.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        A trillion dollar coin here, a trillion dollar coin there…. pretty soon you’re talking about real money!

    • UnCivilServant

      Beginning?

      I thought that was obvious from day 1.

      He’s not in it to win the presidency, he wants to buy the party.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Republicans hate him because he’s a turncoat and a gun grabber and Dems hate him because he’s a billionaire and an authoritarian. I’d bet he has the heartfelt support of the Max Boot types though.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        He’s got my MIL’s vote.

        If that tells you anything about my little Italian MIL.

      • UnCivilServant

        A short authoritarian?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        YES!

        How did you know?

      • Q Continuum

        Your mother-in-law is Mussolini?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        She works at an inner-city public high school in Philly. What do you think?

    • Fatty Bolger

      HIs ads make me laugh. They’re well made, and the one I heard earlier today even had Michael Douglas on it. And then some weenie sounding dude comes on and starts talking. Oh, that’s the guy who thinks he’ll beat Trump? LOL.

  14. Playa Manhattan

    I’ve modified my diet to include at least one decadent (sort of) dessert per day.

    Today, if I have time, I’m going to try making Momofuku’s Cereal Milk Panna Cotta>

    If it’s good with Cornflakes, I’m going to move on to a few other childhood cereals that I was never allowed to have.

    • C. Anacreon

      Golden Grahams in whole milk for the win.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        I’m going to use at least 1 cup of heavy cream.

        Siskel and Ebert, two thumbs up.

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      Imma let you in on a little secret.

      Bay. Rum. Panna. Cotta.

      I used to age my vanilla extra next to my bay rum extract. Was making vanilla panna cotta and grabbed the wrong bottle. The bay, black pepper, and blood orange flavors in the panna cotta were outstanding.

      • Playa Manhattan

        Do you flame it first, or put in as is?

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Just put it in. I thought I was making vanilla, so I just replaced the vanilla 1 for 1 with aftershave and it turned out great. But I didn’t know what I had until it was ready to eat the next day.

        (Bay Rum: Dark rum, a few bay leaves, a few pepper corns, blood orange rind, ginger, star anise. Place in a dark corner of the basement for 6 weeks. Apply to face after shave. Enjoy attention of lady friends. Possibly get a DUI even if sober.)

      • Tulip

        That sounds delicious.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    Meanwhile, got my medical marijuana card. Going to the dispensary tomorrow. Will be posting high this weekend.

    Good. Hope it helps.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      YAY for Yervas!

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Today, if I have time, I’m going to try making Momofuku’s Cereal Milk Panna Cotta>

    If it’s good with Cornflakes, I’m going to move on to a few other childhood cereals that I was never allowed to have.

    I don’t know what hat is, but melty vanilla ice cream on top of a bowl of cereal is awesome.

    • Gdragon

      I do 50-50 ice cream with greek yogurt and Reese’s Puffs or Oreo O’s. It’s incredible.

      If I don’t have yogurt I will simply pour a milkshake on my cereal.

  17. Rhywun

    Venomous Snot Blobs

    Why did I read that as Vermont Snot Blobs?

    • Chafed

      Because they’re synonyms?

    • Bobarian LMD

      They both irritate your skin?

  18. We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

    For Nephilium:

    Saw your morning post re: going to Europe. Having been to Brussels, Bruges and Antwerp, my temptation is to tell you to minimize your time in Brussels, spend a couple of days (at least!) in and around Bruges, and two days/three nights for Antwerp. Brussels’ old centre is fine and all, but it’s mostly a government town with a shocking amount of industrial areas (to my mind, anyways). Bruges is just totes awesome, and Antwerp’s centre has many hidden, under-appreciated charms. Both are eminently walkable. And there’s a small, quiet bar in Bruges down a side-street that serves several hundred different labels of Belgian beer that’s just outtasight.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      Ooooh, forgot to mention: the best effing Belgian Beef Stew (Carbonnade Flamande) I’ve ever had was at a little resto in Bruges, just a five-minute stroll from the Ibis Centrum. I still dream of it, and might go back there one day in ninja gear just to try and “extract” the recipe from the chef.

      • Chafed

        Is it to late to insert a clip of Dr. Evil talking about Belgium?

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Never.

      • Naptown Bill

        All I can think of is Colin Farrell’s line from “In Bruges”.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Great movie.

    • Tundra

      I’m going to Prague in April. Have you been there? Any recommendations?

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Never been, wanna go.

      • creech

        There’s a couple of beer gardens at the western end of the Charles Bridge that are worth a crawl.

      • Tundra

        Thanks. I can do that.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Any recommendations?

        I know a car guy like you wants something sporty to drive around, but resist that. Get a nondescript rental car (without a manual transmission). Be Praugematic about things.

      • Tundra

        Nice.

        Or something.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        The Bone Church in Kutna Hora. Otherwise just walk around and look at the hot Czech women. Especially if the weather is warm.

      • Tundra

        Turns out the CZ factory doesn’t offer tours, so Bone Church and hot chicks it is!

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        I think the factory is way down in Zlin, so it would be a bit of a drive anyway. I think they have a shop in Prague near the train station.

      • DEG

        Otherwise just walk around and look at the hot Czech women.

        Yes!

      • DEG

        If there are tourists, expect there to be pickpockets. Take precautions.

    • Mojeaux

      Brugge is gorgeous.

    • Nephilium

      BEAM: Thanks for the tips.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        No prob. If’n you wanted specifics on the bar or resto, lemme know.

    • Ted S.

      I would have guessed this.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I’d take soccer mom number 17 to the big game.

      Also, mousy number 15

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Number 17, yeah . . .

    • Chipwooder

      I must be getting old because some of those look like such kids to me

  19. wchipperdove

    Thanks a a lot to Plisade for the article on musical theory which I did, indeed, request. Am reading it right now. Good stuff!

    • Plisade

      My pleasure. And based on the article’s comments, before a theory part ii, I’ll do a little something on *how* to practice. It seems peeps get frustrated at a lack of ability, when most likely the problem is not knowing how to practice to get competent quickly.

      • Shirley Knott

        Yes, please!

  20. The Late P Brooks

    In Dresden, a far-right stronghold where resentment over what neo-Nazis call the “bombing holocaust” lingers, Steinmeier addressed a somber ceremony that included forming a human chain to remember victims.

    In a mission to destroy civilian morale, British planes pounded Dresden with explosive and incendiary bombs on the night of Feb. 13, creating a firestorm that tore through streets and laid waste to the city’s Baroque churches and palaces. U.S. planes joined later.

    The bombing of Dresden reminds Germans of the destruction of democracy, nationalist hubris, contempt for humanity, anti-Semitism and racial fanaticism, Steinmeier said in his speech.

    “I fear these dangers have not been banished to this day,” he said, adding they were starting to poison Germany’s public life and democratic institutions.

    It is not enough for democrats to turn away in disgust, he said. “None of this must remain unchallenged in our country. We must all reject hatred and incitement, counter insults, contradict prejudice,” he said.

    Cancel yourself, and make the world a better place, I guess.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Kurt Vonnegut is right up there with Goebbels and Leni Riefenstahl.

      • RAHeinlein

        Damn your nimble fingers to hell Rodrigo!

      • Shirley Knott

        And yet, Harrison Bergeron.

    • Ted S.

      The SED has been poisoning Germany’s democratic institutions, too.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The damn Germans need to get over their war guilt.

      • Rhywun

        ?? – er I mean ?

    • Naptown Bill

      I’m not sure I’d want to tie the bombing of Dresden with guilt over the Holocaust. Plenty of people who aren’t neo-Nazis think that was by any estimation a war crime. Lots and lots of people who had absolutely nothing to do with the Holocaust died horribly as a result of the firebombing. Even at the time people weren’t all that comfortable with it; allegedly the bombing crews involved were sort of swept under the rug back in the UK and even today aren’t really talked about.

      • Rhywun

        And Dresden is just the most famous example. Lots of other cities got the same treatment including one I spent some time in (Würzburg).

      • Naptown Bill

        The Germans should ask us how effective hanging guilt for an atrocity around the necks of an entire society and its descendants in perpetuity, say slavery, works as far as minimizing the attraction of hate groups and so forth.

      • Chipwooder

        Tokyo got it worst of all, at least before the a-bombs dropped. In a single night, 16 square miles of the city was destroyed by fires started by incendiary bombs and approximately 100,000 people were killed.

      • Chafed

        I may be an outlier but I don’t have a problem with it. The Nazis bombed London as long and as hard as they could. They weren’t particular while shelling Stalingrad. This was total war. The Nazis had long made clear how they treat others. If every square inch of Nazi Germany was bombed it wouldn’t trouble me.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        War is hell. It should be conducted in accordance with that rule.

        Perhaps then we wouldn’t be so eager to get into every fight across the globe.

      • Rhywun

        Agreed. And here we are 75 years later and hearing stupid arguments from the “left” and the “right” while the vast majority just want to get on with life and are sick of hearing about it.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Don’t know if you’ve ever read Art Spiegelman’s graphic novel “Maus”, which is his father’s story of survival in the Holocaust. There’s a page in which the character representing his father is passing through Dresden after he’s been freed, where he remarks “Good. Let the Germans have a little of what they gave the Jews.”

      • Jarflax

        Collective guilt and collective blame are wrong. It is entirely understandable how a victim of atrocity would bear malice toward the group responsible, but that does not make it right. The thousands of children burned to death in Dresden did not bear the guilt of the holocaust. And the notion of “they started the war and war is hell so anything we do to end it quickly is proper” carried to its ultimate expression justifies genocide.

      • The Hyperbole

        It’s almost like nationalism might be a bad thing.

      • leon

        That wasn’t true nationalism

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        No, the children of Dresden did not bear the blame, any more than the children in the Warsaw ghetto or in Stalingrad.

        While I agree with you that the utilitarian conclusion of “war is hell” is genocide, which is explicitly immoral, my comment was more intended to draw attention to our current obsession with moral war, which I do not believe exists. We strive to attain some unachievable standard of military conduct that only serves to keep us in perpetual conflict, instead of ending things decisively and then going home. We should simultaneously be far, far more reluctant to use war as “politics by other means”, and much more ruthless in our application of it. Fear is a useful deterrent, both to our enemies and to us, even if that fear is of the guilt we will bear for our actions.

        We are truly an empire now, complete with occupying forces in far away lands that our own people have no understanding of. And we will bear a heavy price for it in the long run.

      • Gadfly

        That reminds me of a similar thing I read in a book by a Korean woman who was imprisoned by the Imperial Japanese. She was imprisoned for not paying homage to in image of the Emperor (it violated her religious beliefs to do so), and after she was freed by the Americans and was in transit to America her plane had a stopover in Japan. The destruction she saw from her plane she interpreted as God’s judgment on the Japanese for what they had done.

    • Rhywun

      Is there a link for this?

  21. Heroic Mulatto

    The only thing I can think of that comes close to this goodness is the way I eat my Thanksgiving dinner. I use the potatoes and stuffing as a base and pile on top all of the turkey fixings and gravy for a bowl of Thanksgiving goodness.

    This shit right here is why Western Civilization is dead.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      This shit right here is why Western Civilization is dead.

      And covered in gravy and cranberry sauce.   {insert Homer Simpson drooling sounds here}

    • Gustave Lytton

      Zombie Col. Sanders agrees.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      I’m eating a KFC bowl over bat soup.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        I don’t have anything necessarily against the KFC bowl, as fast food should be portable. But if you are not a fucking infant, there is no reason to eat Thanksgiving dinner out of a bowl. That is the worst fat man-child food shit I have ever heard of.

      • Brett L

        That’s what the bread is for. Open face sandwiches are classy and adult.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        How is that guy going to mix the potatoes, gravy, and turkey around while making disgusting lip-smacking noises as he waits for his CS:GO match to start if its on top of bread?

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Put it all in a blender, drink it with a tactical straw.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        Oh lawd Jesus….

      • Chafed

        What is a bowl if not a ceramic ass?

      • Heroic Mulatto

        Sometimes a bowl is just a bowl.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        I like mixing Thanksgiving items together, but I guess I keep it classy with a plate.

      • Gustave Lytton

        *flips donburi bowl*

      • Not Adahn

        My diner does a Thanksgiving Benedict: Stuffing topped with turkey, topped with two poached eggs and Hollandaise.

    • Brett L

      Put a pice of bread under that. Mmmm

    • Spudalicious

      Affirm. The components should be kept separate and all of it smothered in gravy.

  22. Sandi

    “Bloomberg Hits Back at ‘Carnival Barking Clown’ Trump: ‘Behind Your Back They Laugh at You’”

    —————————————————————————————————————————————–

    “First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.”

    – Mahatma Gandhi.

    • Heroic Mulatto

      I saw what you did there.

  23. Certified Public Asshat

    The mashed potatoes are the best part of the KFC Famous bowl for me. I wanted to make my own that would do the KFC bowl justice. Making copycat KFC mashed potatoes at home isn’t difficult.

    To make the mashed potatoes, first peel and cube 8-10 baking potatoes. Yep, that’s right. Plain old baking potatoes like Russets. They don’t have a lot of moisture but do have a lot of starch. This combination makes the base for a perfectly fluffy yet creamy mashed potato.

    That’s a lot of effort to make instant mashed potatoes.

    • Playa Manhattan

      My wife and kids complain about the Idaho instant mashed potatoes. I don’t see the problem. I celebrate their entire catalog. Especially the applewood bacon.

    • Chipwooder

      The keys to making fantastic mashed potatoes:

      1)Boil them whole with the skins on so they absorb less moisture
      2)You can either leave them on (which I usually do) or peel them after the boiling
      3)Then. mash them up in the now-drained pot you boiled them in to dry them out a bit
      4)Warm the milk before you mix it into the mash

      • Jarflax

        4)Warm the milk before you mix it into the mash

        So close to right and yet so far away as well. Cream, half and half, or for a touch of added savor sour cream.

      • l0b0t

        Buttermilk. Real churned buttermilk, not that cultured crap.

      • Old Man With Candy

        Creme fraiche and butter, otherwise you’re just playing make believe.

      • Ozymandias

        I really enjoy all of you cooking snobs trying to out-snob each other.

        *goes back to eating peanut butter and jelly on low carb bread*

  24. The Late P Brooks

    So I gnawed a pathway through the big drift in my driveway with a combination of shoveling and snowblower, and made a run to the grocery store.

    My new knobby truck tires passed their first real test with flying colors, including bashing through the snow piled at the end of my driveway by my idiot neighbor with his plow.

    The path was almost completely filled in by the time I got back from the store.

    • R C Dean

      I had a pleasant drive on dry pavement this morning, spiced up by a crew of fit young women on their road bikes. Slowed down for that, lemme tell ya.

      • KSuellington

        That’s very considerate of you to slow down for them. Safety first.

    • Playa Manhattan

      I’m skiing all next week. Not even going to bring chains.

  25. Rebel Scum

    Bloomberg was very quick to respond via Twitter, however, calling out Trump as a “carnival barking clown.” He added. “They know you inherited a fortune & squandered it with stupid deals and incompetence.”

    Sick burn. ///notreally

    • R C Dean

      I’ll just hold my breath until the “OMG, we must have civility and decency” crowd slaps Bloomberg around for this childish retort.

      *turns blue, falls down*

    • Pope Jimbo

      So is Bloomy going to end up in some homeless shelter with Adrian Peterson and other broke ex-athletes talking about how they blew their fortunes?

      At least AP had a lot of sex with a shit ton of baby-mammas (and had a sweet ass switch). Bloomy is wasting his on TV ads and other stupid crap and still no one will like him.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    D’oh!!

    German self-loathing link

    German President at Dresden memorial service.

    • Heroic Mulatto

      The commemoration comes a week after Hoecke, who wants German history books to be rewritten to emphasize German suffering over that of Jews in World War Two, caused a political earthquake.

      Well, now I can think of one German who should loathe himself a lot more.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        We need to translate that into German.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        I’m sure you can do it.

      • Viking1865

        “who wants German history books to be rewritten to emphasize German suffering over that of Jews in World War Two”

        So I’m gonna guess this is a lie, but I am not familiar with Hoecke.

    • Rhywun

      Yeah, that has Reuters written all over it.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    spiced up by a crew of fit young women on their road bikes. Slowed down for that, lemme tell ya.

    Safety first!

  28. Rhywun

    It’s happening! unemployment line edition:

    “The American people on all sides are waking up. We’ve gotten too caught up in partisan support. Now we’re paying attention. There is a huge uprising. People had to lose their jobs to find out what it was.”

    • Chafed

      Guess how many of them have voted for Team Blue the past 2 decades. Surprise dummies, crappy laws hurt you too.

      • Q Continuum

        It won’t matter. A lot more people are gonna have to feel the pain before Kali even lurches back to purple.

    • Pope Jimbo

      I’ll believe that the CA Dems are in trouble as soon as I see the legislature repeal their Top-2 primary law. That will be the canary in the mine signal for me. As soon as they think that they won’t be running 2 Dems in each race, they will change that law. No way they will leave it on the books and have 2 GOP-ers on the ballot.

      • KSuellington

        Oh please make it happen. But I think that ship has sailed thanks to all the East Coast transplants that can here and voted for California to become where they left.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      Fuck them. Learn to code.

      These assholes never gave a shit when they voted for stupid stuff that never hurt them.

      Karma is a bitch.

      If they haven’t learned a valuable lesson and stop supporting the Blue Bureaucracy then they deserve to live in the streets like a hobo in San Franshitsco.

    • Chipwooder

      Virginia gets a look at its future.

    • Fatty Bolger

      “My entire political mindset has changed drastically following the enactment of AB5,” says Cathy Hertz, a freelance copyeditor of STM (science-technology-medicine) books, from Loma Linda. Hertz campaigned for Barack Obama cross-country at her own expense in 2008; she campaigned for him locally, in Los Angeles, in 2012. “Now I feel that the rights of entrepreneurs are being stifled, trampled upon, violated,” she says.

      I mean, it was OK when it was just other people’s rights being crushed. Now it’s happening to me!

      • Viking1865

        I really don’t get how anyone who’s actually a self-employed small business owner would ever vote Democrat. They hate you.

  29. Rebel Scum

    Papers, please.

    In order to purchase a pistol or revolver in Rhode Island, residents must show the seller a “blue card”: a certificate that shows the applicant has passed the state’s requisite gun safety exam. But current state laws require that all records of blue card applications be destroyed after 30 days by the Rhode Island Department of Environmental Management, which distributes the cards — making it potentially more difficult to authenticate the cards when they are used to purchase weapons.

    While RIDEM does not foresee changing the way blue cards are distributed to qualified applicants, the department is evaluating its current policy on record-keeping, according to Chief Public Affairs Officer of RIDEM Michael Healey. He also noted that the statute that the current policy is based upon does not explicitly require RIDEM to destroy the lists of names after 30 days.

    “For several years, we have relied on an internal legal opinion interpreting the law as requiring us to do that,” Healey said, adding that it is “reasonable to infer” that the attorney who wrote this interpretation was mindful of state and federal laws that prohibit government agencies from keeping a registry of privately owned firearms.

  30. Rufus the Monocled

    No he wasn’t. The President can say what he wants. Know your lane.

  31. Gadfly

    Can I tell you how excited I am that politics has devolved into a name-calling contest? These must be our best and brightest!

    Not our best and brightest, but our representatives, which is really the whole point of representative government, to give the people a government that reflects them.

  32. Pope Jimbo

    Uffda. Can’t believe I’m saying this, but it looks like the Vikings stadium is really being built by e-pulltabs. Almost too successful. Now there is a brewing fight to steal the extra funds.

    Charitable gambling revenue is accruing so rapidly in U.S. Bank Stadium’s coffers that the Minnesota Vikings are looking to fortify their defense at the Legislature.

    The most recent estimates indicate there will be almost $250 million in the account to pay off stadium debt by 2023. That number could grow with the forecast at the end of the month, creating a tempting pot of cash that lawmakers may choose to tap this session for other purposes.

    Got to start spreading that loot around, or you run the risk of having to shut the tax down once the stadium is paid off.

  33. Count Potato

    “Let’s not forget that #AmberHeard was not only arrested for abusing her gf in 2009 & admitted on tape that she abused #JohnnyDepp, there’re also other women who were victims of her violence & she also beat up her sister & refused to answer under oath whether she had abused her.”

    https://twitter.com/Marussia15/status/1227946037068746752

    Even if true, I doubt anything will happen to her.

  34. Rebel Scum

    This doesn’t seem that bad.

    Jim Carrey was speaking on camera to Heat Magazine reporter Charlotte Long when the exchange occurred. In the interview, Long asked Carrey, “In the film, Sonic has a bucket list and I was wondering after all you’ve done in your career, in your life, is there anything still left in your bucket list?”

    The actor replied: “Just you.” His remark elicited nervous laughter from Long, who replied, “Wow… I don’t know what to say to that.”

    Carrey said, “Just own it.” Long replied, “OK, I’m owning it now.”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      He’s a comedian. They’re supposed to push the edge. Get over it.

      • Playa Manhattan

        Carrey is a miserable asshole.

      • Mojeaux

        He is.

        However, hitting on her was a big giant “fuck you” to the SJW and Cancel Culture. Saying, “Just own it” was a rebuke.

      • AlmightyJB

        Agreed. On both counts.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        True, but that doesn’t change my opinion.

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      Ugh, that’s a new low. Really, very gross and inappropes. Cancel this shit.

      Dr Robtonik is supposed to be fat.

    • Q Continuum

      I can’t blame him. Would.

    • Mojeaux

      Carrey said, “Just own it.”

      Perfect. /nosarc

      /not a Carrey fan

      • Drake

        One of the things I loved about Opie & Anthony and Jim Norton – when somebody told a total failure of a joke, they would literally stop the show and dissect the bomb. I made for really funny and uncomfortable radio.

    • Chipwooder

      I don’t like Jim Carrey much, but I don’t think everyone should get the vapors over every obnoxious comment.

    • Ted S.

      Reading it, I thought it was an obvious joke. I haven’t watched the video, so I can’t tell if he was at all serious.

      Hell, it’s a joke that would fit in the comments here.

  35. The Late P Brooks

    We wouldn’t have this problem if we had repealed the 22nd Amendment while the Ascended One was still President

    Retired Ambassador Marie “Masha” Yovanovitch — a highly respected career diplomat who unwittingly became one of the central figures in the impeachment drama — warned about the degradation of the State Department and took veiled jabs at the Trump administration in her first public remarks since leaving the diplomatic service.

    Speaking at an event at Georgetown University on Wednesday where she was honored for “Excellence in the Conduct of Diplomacy,” Yovanovitch called for a “vigorous Department of State” to regain its stature in the nation’s capital, warning that “right now the State Department is in trouble.”

    The retired career foreign service officer, as she did in her testimony before the House during the impeachment inquiry, cautioned that the department was being “hollowed out” and helmed by “senior leaders (who) lack policy vision, moral clarity and leadership skills.”

    My beautiful Deep State is in shambles!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      a highly respected career diplomat who unwittingly became one of the central figures in the impeachment drama

      So many adjectives….

      • Viking1865

        Seriously, it’s like country’s official names. The more words in front of Republic, the shittier it gets.

        Republic of _________

        Federal Republic of _________

        Democratic Federal Republic of ___________

        People’s Democratic Federal Republic of ________

    • Q Continuum

      CNN has become such a pathetic establishment bootlicker that they’re going to wake up one day and find they’ve alienated everyone; Berniebots are already starting to get pissed off at it since it’s so obvious they’re trying to kneecap him. Everyone right of Stalin already hates it, what are they gonna have left? Career bureaucrats and elected officials? Doesn’t seem like enough of an audience to keep afloat.

      • Chipwooder

        That’s why they locked down the airports so long ago – need that captive audience.

    • Rhywun

      Poor thing is reduced to speaking gigs and collecting awards from all the right people. Maybe a gig on CNN or MSNBC. ?

    • Chipwooder

      How dare anyone deny us of our divinely bestowed powers!

  36. Juvenile Bluster

    I’m on my weekly conference call with the Florida Bar Business Law Section’s lobbyists on how all our bills are going in the state house/senate.

    One of them just remarked about how he’s amazed that one of the representatives they contacted actually asked questions about the bill.

    • Brett L

      New guy.

    • Chafed

      Smdh

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      *pulls out shakeweight*

      I’m ready.

    • AlmightyJB

      I’m doing resistance training with my tongue.

    • Charles Easterly

      “glibfit?”

      I clicked.
      I saw (here I mean to indicate that I briefly watched).
      I found a D&D reference.

      “Some may call this junk. Me, I call them treasures. Chaotic neutral. Follow me, I know da wae.”

      By definition of their (fictional) nature, Chaotic Neutrals cannot be trusted to be followed, nor can they be trusted at all, except to act randomly.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Yep, let the biological males in and they will take all the top spots. Trans people should have to compete against either their birth gender or each other.

  37. Scruffy Nerfherder

    A biologically male marathon runner who identifies as a transgender woman is set to compete in the USA Olympic trials later in February.

    It’s “runner that was assigned male at birth”.

    Jesus people, get it right.

    • Pope Jimbo

      A runner who had their sex assumed by some patriarchal asshole doctor at birth….

      • leon

        Unless he’s an actual middlesex individual his sex is male.

    • AlmightyJB

      If women want to end this shit, they need to start boycotting events like the Olympics en masse. Not that I give a shit about women’s sports.

    • Shirley Knott

      Are these MtF athletes hormone suppressed enough that testosterone levels fall within the anti-doping org’s standards for women?

      • Rhywun

        I read somewhere those standards are still way higher than the testosterone levels of average women. The skeletomuscular differences are important too, and not addressed at all.

      • Viking1865

        Yep, if someone has gone through puberty as a man, they are, for purposes of athletic competition, not a woman. Just watch Fallon Fox’s UFC fights. It looks like a man beating the shit out of a woman, because physically that’s what it is.

        I’ll call you she/her, I’ll call you by your preferred name, but there’s no way in hell I think that a MTF athlete should be competing with women, anymore than a grown man should compete with children.

    • Rhywun

      I’ve noticed that Fox does that. It’s really annoying.

      • Animal

        I can see Pelosi spouting toxic snot blobs though. Especially this November. Say, the second Wednesday of the month.

  38. Evan from Evansville

    Short post.

    I think I am having baaaad day. Epileptic symptoms. More shaking and balance issues than I normally deal with—which are pretty much never. Today almost went to ER to make sure this wasn’t getting out of hand. Light seizure symptoms making me feel weird. Talked to lots of docs and they think I need to make sure I’m actually properly on all me meds and doses, but that I should try to take everything in stride. This is bad but it’s short and you’ll be ok, pretty much.

    This was harder to type than it should have been. More details will have to come later–delayed for now.

    I am supposed to fly back to Korea in a week…haven’t got the ticket yet…this is not a good time for my brain to be pulling this shit on me. Sadly, I’m likely the cause of the problem and I need to learn from my mistakes to try and minimize this shit.

    Yikes. OK. Be strong, soldier. You tried it for a while fairly successfully. NOW. STAY STRONG SOLDIER. Don’t just get there. Remain there.

    WHoooo.—kay…

    • Evan from Evansville

      Anxiety is pushing some things harder than normal. The left side of my face is having (light) movement and spasm activities and I can also feel that in my throat on my left side. That was always the focal point of my illness and sometimes speaking or breathing were hard or I couldn’t do the former on my own. I could breathe out my nose no problem but through my mouth was hard.

      The issues are definitely happening now though much, much less severe than they used to be when I was still in the hospital.

      My brain has kinda gone bye bye today.

      • Q Continuum

        Dood, maybe you should consider postponing going back to Asia; it sounds like you need more time to recuperate.

      • Evan from Evansville

        This is a very real thought I have to balance now. Supposed to fly out the 19th. Orientation for new school starts 24th. Semester starts March.

        Holy fuck. Lady is already over there and certainly my social life and work and blahblahblah.

        Accident was Sept 22 and I have pretty much spent most of 2019 either teaching for two months in Thailand and trying to get my foot in the door freelancing.

        It might be too soon to start anew. But I’ve been fallow for so long that it’s hard to think my self out of giving it my best shot. I felt good yesterday. I have felt good the last 6 weeks. Sometimes fucking phenomenal.

        Deep breath.

      • Not Adahn

        Will Lady make things better or worse?

      • Spudalicious

        It takes time for the brain to heal itself. I think you shouldn’t push it. A normal surgery is six months to complete recovery and a year before you really feel normal again. And this involves your brain.

    • Hyperion

      The blood pressure medicine I was on (way too high dosage) made me feel like I was having a damn stroke. It was awful. I was dizzy and my equilibrium was off. My vision’s depth perspective was all fucked up too, like my focal point on one side was farther away than the other side. I felt really spaced out too, like nothing was real. The problem is I kept getting better, but they never changed the dosage. My BP was 90/60. I called my doctor and they took me in right away. After they gradually cut my dosage to about a third, I got better pretty quickly.

      • Evan from Evansville

        Yikes that sounds scary. I hope that my recovery comes quickly as well—I’m fairly certain that my med levels are off and inconsistent because of mistakes that I have made.

        Right now I’m on Depakote and Lyrica. I have some Nerontin around (that stuff is very powerful and I don’t know how I feel about it. I stopped taking it regularly a while ago. We switched meds and dosage.)

        I’m somewhat spaced out. It’s hard right now–the anxiety is increasing the other things that are going on. I can’t tell where one begins and another ends.

      • Hyperion

        Hope you feel better soon. Maybe see another doctor. It’s unreal how negligent they can be with medications. Almost all prescription medication have side effects and some people are lot more susceptible to those with certain drugs. Doctors like statistics is what I’ve noticed, they don’t seem too much interested in your personal experience.

    • Cannoli

      I’m sorry Evan, I hope your recovery goes quickly. Sending well wishes your way.

  39. Yusef drives a Kia

    God I need to exhale, I’m so spun out… i…

  40. Hyperion

    Good afternoon, wokesters.

    This is just wrong in so many ways

    “You might not think of the knitting world as a particularly political community, but you’d be wrong. Many knitters are particularly active in social justice communities and love to discuss the revolutionary role that knitters have played in our culture.”

    Ok, that’s it, I’ve changed my mind about ever getting involved in knitting.

    “Knitting stars”

    Oh.my.fucking.god.

    We’re doomed as a species, there’s no hope left.

    • Jarflax

      Wait you read an article by an actual reasonable, open minded liberal, who actually took the time to listen to the other side, and who realized that the other side were not all insane racists, and that made you decide we are doomed as a species?

      That was the most optimistic thing I have read in months.

  41. The Late P Brooks

    That Jim Carey story:

    I’m no fan of Crey, but who gives a shit? Tat seems completely innocuous to me. In the old days, she would have either rolled her eyes at him like a kindergarten teacher, or slipped him her room key. Either way, there’s no reason for any buttinski-ism on the part of anybody else.

    • Viking1865

      “rolled her eyes at him like a kindergarten teacher, or slipped him her room key.”

      Or both.

  42. Pope Jimbo

    With Klomentum, come Kloshade I guess.

    Daily Beast is outraged that Special K takes money from Cargill.

    Note to out of staters, EVERYONE in Minnesoda is on Cargill’s payroll. The best though is disgruntled Iowa guy who calls her out Paul Wellstone style.

    “She’s running around saying she’s another Paul Wellstone, yeah? Oh, really?” Petersen asked sarcastically, of the late Minnesota senator who came up in the agricultural labor movement and who Klobuchar has cited as a political mentor. “Paul Wellstone was a personal friend of mine, and she’s no Paul Wellstone.”

    • leon

      Harris has to be pissed. That she failed and Klondike bar and buttigeig are doing well. I bet she threw some parents in jail on truancy charges for it.

      • Hyperion

        White privilege wins every time.

        “I bet she threw some parents in jail on truancy charges for it.”

        Her own probably, and she was going to do that anyway.

  43. Yusef drives a Kia

    Alright My Friends, Wendy went done early this morning, and after 5 minutes, they brought her back, I hit the road, and 2 hours later, he signs were good, with vasodilators, and intubation, O2 saturation 98%, after speaking with her nurses and chilling with her, they brought up DNR, I talked to my Sister about it, as Wendy and I had done in the past, so it was a relief when they spoke first. DNR signed, kisses given( Damn the Isolation!) and when I left, she was at 83%Alarm, with 100% O2, they can’t do anymore than that. I just got a call, they said her Heart rate is slowing, it’s time for her to Go See,
    I can’t deal with this at al….

    • Gender Traitor

      Sending love to both of you, friend.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Wendy is already with God, her body just doesn’t know yet, I am at peace with it all, she is tired,
        and I’m lonely and confused,

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        and then I collapse into a mess…… I’m actually hyperventilating, I need to stop..

      • Spudalicious

        My dear friend. It is time to let her go. I went through this very same thing with my father. The bravest thing you can do is let her go home. And after an appropriate time, it will be time to heal.

    • Cannoli

      Yusef I’m so sorry, my heart goes out to you both.

    • AlmightyJB

      That’s terrible news, I’m sorry.

    • Bill Door

      Thoughts and prayers your way. Good luck Yusef.

      • Ted S.

        My thought was this, which I hope people don’t find too emotional.

      • Tundra

        Perfect.

    • Q Continuum

      So sorry man.

    • Heroic Mulatto

      I’m sorry to hear this.

      We are with you.

    • Fatty Bolger

      So very sorry to hear that.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      My condolences dude

    • Tundra

      Prayers brother.

      Your love for her is magnificent.

      Good luck.

    • Charles Easterly

      YdaK,

      Although I have not read most of the posts of those experiencing hardships, I just read yours.
      I am fairly certain that we have not exchanged comments, YdaK, and naturally you may conclude that I have been un-supportive.

      If I recall correctly, you live in a place where the following support may be available and of use/comfort:
      Family Caregiver Alliance
      National Center on Caregiving
      (415) 434-3388 | (800) 445-8106
      Website: http://www.caregiver.org
      Email: info@caregiver.org
      FCA CareJourney: http://www.caregiver.org/carejourney
      Family Care Navigator: http://www.caregiver.org/family-care-navigator

      I think the individuals that you will contact through these links/phone numbers are very willing to provide any help they can. Thus, if one or two cannot offer support they have access to others who are able to do so.

    • Not Adahn

      I am so sorry Bob.

    • DEG

      I’m sorry.

    • Count Potato

      Sorry 🙁

    • LemonGrenade

      My condolences, Yusef.

    • Jarflax

      Oh, Yusef, I am so sorry. You are in my thoughts, and my prayers.

    • Not an Economist

      I am sorry. My deepest condolences to you.

      I raise a glass to Wendy … and you Yusef.

    • Tulip

      I’m sorry

  44. Pope Jimbo

    I can’t imagine why I am such a shitlord who loves to live out in the burbs and not in a major city. I must be crazy or something to not love city living.

    Local pols close loophole in parking laws. St. Paul neighborhood doesn’t have enough parking, so the city passes ordinances that prohibit any parking unless locals buy parking permits for each of their cars. The locals discover that the ordinance allows them to buy additional parking tags for visitors. They then turn around and sell those tags to people who want to visit the state fair and make some money.

    Pols are not amused.

    During the 12 days of the fair, Kuchta said more and more fairgoers were parking on streets as far as a mile away, bringing more traffic to the area west of Como Regional Park. Kuchta said the District 10 Council had been working for a few years to enforce parking regulations and crack down on those who parked too close to corners and fire hydrants and blocked crosswalks. That is when it learned people were selling their permits to people who didn’t live there.

    “They saw it as an opportunity and took advantage,” he said. But “it goes against the spirit of the intent.”

    Why do these wreckers go against the spirit of the law?

    • AlmightyJB

      City Councils suck.

    • Shirley Knott

      I actually worked with a startup that was all about connecting people with periodically empty spaces to rent them to people needing parking. College town limited parking, freshmen not allowed cars on campus. They did modestly well, and were expanding into more markets.

      • l0b0t

        When I lived in Tallahassee, our place was very close to the stadium and had a huge corner yard. We made great money selling parking, hot dogs, and draft beer during FSU home games.

      • Shirley Knott

        Yup. And in the app generation world, being able to reserve a spot, single use or repeat, and pay for it was pretty attractive.

  45. The Late P Brooks

    “They saw it as an opportunity and took advantage,” he said. But “it goes against the spirit of the intent.”

    Ban arbitrage!

    • Jarflax

      Maybe if they ban arbitrage they can make markets inefficient enough that central planning can compete!

    • Hyperion

      Bloomberg is a giant POS, but the left call everyone a racist so much that it’s completely lost meaning.

      “It was one of the most racist policies I’ve ever lived through that deeply impacted the entire city.

      — Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (@AOC) February 13, 2020”

      Yeah right, Karla Marx, you ‘lived’ through it. Just stop already, you’re stupid enough as it is.

      • AlmightyJB

        That’s true but he’s running for the Democrat ticket so it will probably work.

    • Rhywun

      They would be perfectly happy with stop’n’frisk if it was applied with the correct racial quotas in mind.

      • The Hyperbole

        But then they wold be Republicans.

      • Rhywun

        Or Democrats pushing “mandatory buybacks”.

      • l0b0t

        I don’t know about your neck of the woods but amongst those NYC residents I know, the only folk who didn’t like the impact stop & frisk had on street crime were those who would have spent a couple days in Rikers had they been stopped and frisked. However, the police officers of my acquaintance have told me that the policy’s true purpose was to get more people into the city’s CompStat system (upon arrest, NYPD tends to go through one’s phone) so as to build an extensive database of the population. I find this far more egregious than any statistical ethnic disparity.

      • Rhywun

        Yeah, the fact that crime continued to steadily go down for years after stop’n’frisk was dramatically reduced tells me it didn’t play the role in reducing crime its adherents claim.

      • Not Adahn

        Well duh, SnF got all the senior criminals locked up where they couldn’t teach their trade to the next generation!

    • Jarflax

      I PAY VISIT TO COUSIN SEA IF MUST KNOW! SEA HAVE CHAFING ISSUE AND NEED SALT RESISTANT OINTMENT.

  46. straffinrun

    You are fascinating. What makes you tick?

  47. Yusef drives a Kia

    2:31 Pst, Wendy left this Earth! My little Skyrocket! Goodbye!!!!!!

    • l0b0t

      I’m so sorry Bob. I can’t imagine your pain but I wish I could carry it for you.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Aghhhh, it Hurts…..

      • Ozymandias

        I’m sorry, Bob. My prayers and condolences.

    • straffinrun

      So sorry for your loss, Bob. My deepest condolences.

    • Rhywun

      Oh so sorry.

    • Bill Door

      Condolences to you. 🙁

    • Shirley Knott

      So sorry.

    • Ted S.

      My condolences.

    • Sean

      I am so sorry to hear that. My heartfelt condolences Bob.

      We’re here for ya.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      Sorry man. We’re all here for anything you need. I’ve seen it before. This is a group of weirdos, but they’re all really good people.

    • Cannoli

      Oh Yusef, I’m so sorry

    • Drake

      So sorry.

    • DEG

      I’m sorry.

      • dbleagle

        I am sorry for your loss Bob. My best wishes to you and Bella.

    • Viking1865

      I’m very sorry to hear that. Please be sure to let everyone here know if there’s anything any of us can do.

    • Mojeaux

      I just saw this. Bob, I am so sorry. Please please please know that. r. Mojeaux and I (yes, he has been kept apprised all this time) are praying for you.

    • Jarflax

      I am so sorry Yusef.

    • whahappan

      So sorry. She was lucky to have you.

  48. The Late P Brooks

    I read something about that Bloomberg stop-n-frisk thing earlier, and it said those “bad neighborhood” comments were made at the Aspen Institute, which makes me think it was more likely than not the same Aspen Institute talk he gave where he said something on the order of no black man under the age of 35(?) should ever be allowed to own a gun.

    No

    black

    man

    Some people might look at that as an egregiously racist thing to say, but nobody has brought it up.

    I’m going to just say the people who are all so ostentatiously butthurt about stop-n-frisk would be perfectly okay with it, if it hadn’t devolved into an exercise in numbers-padding and bullshit low level marijuana possession busts, and had just been a “reasonable restriction” on firearm possession in NYC.

    • Q Continuum

      Well it’s certainly an excellent example of the racist roots of gun control.

  49. Yusef drives a Kia

    Nono NO!!!!
    and no one around me….

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      My Dog knows,

  50. The Late P Brooks

    Man, I’m sorry, Yusef. Hopefully, she’s at peace, now.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      She was tired, now she rests with the Lord…

      • Ownbestenemy

        Really sad to hear about your loss.

      • Timeloose

        So sorry Bob.

    • R C Dean

      Oh, man. So sorry to hear that.

      Her troubles are over; she is released. Hang in there, my friend.

  51. The Late P Brooks

    What makes you tick?

    I’m self-winding.

    • straffinrun

      I feel like total asshole for making that comment right now.

  52. The Late P Brooks

    I feel like total asshole for making that comment right now.

    We’re all bozos on this bus.

    • Tundra

      This.

      Bob knows we love him.

    • Ted S.

      As I wrote in the morning links, some of us are mean sobers.

      More seriously though, a lot of the dark cynicism and Don Rickles-like zingers I throw out are my way of dealing with what has always been a fairly painful shyness and social anxiety.

      • straffinrun

        Intent matters. Never seen you act maliciously.

      • Q Continuum

        YOUR MOMMA WEARS COMBAT BOOTS

      • Tundra

        Some of those songs, though..

  53. Yusef drives a Kia

    Reality, read what OZY wrote,
    Feelings? I’m a fucking mess kids, this is a fucking hard hit, Rollercoaster emotions, but not Suicide!
    I’m not going anywhere,
    You help me out Glibs!

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I’m not being callus, am I? telling you guys about my Wife’s passing?
      You are my friends, and you need to know, IMO

      • Q Continuum

        Why would that be callous? You need to get it off your chest and it’s very sad. We are (mostly) sympathetic ears, vent away.

      • DEG

        This.

      • Drake

        Talking it out (or typing) is healthy. I’ve had too much experience with mourning over the past few years.

        When the wound is a little less fresh, we’ll talk about the process of grief.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Not callous at all. Gotta let it out.

      • mikey

        That’s how special this place is. You have friends here even if we’ve never physically met. We’re all wishing we could do more to help than type kind words.

      • RJD

        🙁

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Aw, fuck.
        I’m so sorry for you, mang.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Say whatever you want brother. We are all here for you.

        When my mom passed away last year, this was the best place to let out some of the things I felt. Just go ahead and vent as much as you want.

        I wish I could do more. It sucks so much to lose someone you love.

      • LemonGrenade

        It’s not callous, you’re sharing with friends. I hope doing so helps alleviate the pain.

      • Jarflax

        We have gotten to know you and through you to know her. Of course you should tell us.

    • Trigger Hippie

      We’re family, Bob. We love you. Talk as often and openly as you want. Rant, rave, hurl personal insults, doesn’t matter right now. We all feel for you and will forgive you anything.

      I know that might not mean much right now, but we’re here if you need us.

    • LemonGrenade

      At 10% ABV?? That’s beer for *trying* to work late, and failing to get anything done.

      • DEG

        I got a few things done. I have a system up and running trying to duplicate a bug.

      • LemonGrenade

        I always get too cavalier if I’ve drunk too much and try to work late, then I do things like get into the production database and make live updates. Or blow caches when we’re at over 10k rpm. No caution.

      • Rhywun

        +1 or 2 drunken production releases at 3AM

  54. The Late P Brooks

    That “Mayhem” “I’m your big rambunctious puppy in the car” ad came on a few minutes ago. I didn’t even realize it the first fifty times I saw it, but I guess the girl driving the car is Tina Fey. After due consideration of this new information… I’d still lick her face.

    • LJW

      Is it true that they cut the original plan to have him sniff her crotch?

  55. Yusef drives a Kia

    I’m calling people I think should know, and I’m getting Shit responses.

    • Mojeaux

      That really bites. Assholes.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      So many people are wildly uncomfortable with death, and don’t know how to respond to the news. What comes out of their mouths may not be anything like what they really mean. Awkwardness in the face of death is a thing.

      • Rhywun

        Can confirm.

    • DEG

      Sorry.

  56. commodious spittoon

    Trump appointing his kids to jobs in the White House is unbelievably corrupt, but it’s just fine for Biden to look the other way while his kid was gifted sweetheart deals in countries with which he was diplomatically entangled? At this point I’m no longer asking for consistency, just for a level of hypocrisy within the normal bounds.

  57. Yusef drives a Kia

    I don’t know what to do with her body, Cremation is our wish, but I don’t have the money, or any clue as to what to do, I’m Lost and alone, any tips?

    • Mojeaux

      Bob, I want to call you. How do I make that happen?

    • DEG

      Another GoFundme for the money?

      For the cremation, maybe someone at the hospital can help?

      • Drake

        This. Somebody in the hospital morgue can help?

      • R C Dean

        They’ll hold her until Yusef can make arrangements.

        And if they give you any shit, let me know. TPTB have my email. I talk hospitalese, so I can sort it out.

      • R C Dean

        GoFundMe, repost the PayPal link. Whatever. We got this, bro. You don’t need to worry about that.

      • Trigger Hippie

        ^

        I can’t help much, but send a link and I’ll do what I can.

    • LemonGrenade

      When my father in law died, we cremated his remains as well. We went through a funeral home, which handled all the paperwork and arrangements for around $1k, although pricing will surely vary depending on your location.