Mexican Good Friday morning links!

by | Apr 10, 2020 | Daily Links | 546 comments

Except I have too many tortillas and its been a while since I had chilaqueles.  Obviously this isn’t my breakfast, because mine looks better.

Now on for the links!

They all made fun of those of us hedging our bets in gold.  Who’s laughing now!?

They said anchor babies weren’t a thing.  There were wrong.  At least drugs didn’t fall out of her vagina, then she’d have real problems,

They insisted there were no libertarians during s pandemic because only the state could act on behalf of the public’s best interest and enforce the measures necessary to keep society safe.  Once again, they don’t know what they’re talking about.

They thought Copacabana was a song about a showgirl that did the Cha Cha.  In all fairness, it is.

You thought Venezuela couldn’t get any worse?  Think again!

They think I give two shits about this guy?  Like being under house arrest is a unique circumstance.

They seem to paint a gruesome picture in Brazil, but it doesn’t seem that bad…yet.

 

For some reason I always thought it would be funny if William Shatner  did one of those dramatic readings of this song.

About The Author

mexican sharpshooter

mexican sharpshooter

WARNING: Glibertarians.com contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm. https://youtu.be/qiAyX9q4GIQ?t=2m22s

546 Comments

  1. Rhywun

    ?

  2. Juvenile Bluster

    I mean, technically it’s Friday morning…

    • Aloysious

      10:24 pm

      I theenk somebody, he has been drinking, yes?

  3. I. B. McGinty

    The one time being up late has paid off!

    • Digby is still NOT a Naked Intruder

      Hey! ?

      • I. B. McGinty

        I always thought your late night articles were on Saturdays, but since you’re here I’m going to crack open a cold one.

      • CPRM

        Time to work that wood.

      • Digby is still NOT a Naked Intruder

        Well, now….you both flatter me!

        I.B.–they are Saturdays…or, Sundays, depending on where you are. And time being what it is–I have no idea where I was going with that thought.

      • I. B. McGinty

        I’m working the second of 2 shifts and that’s enough to throw everything out of whack. My brain tends to not work as well the first couple of hours when I wake up.

      • CPRM

        Hell, some days I can’t even walk straight for a few hours after I wake up. The heavy drinking may have something to do with that, but I’ll chalk it up not waking up well, that way I can keep drinking.

      • Digby is still NOT a Naked Intruder

        That ‘not waking up well’ is a real bugger.

        More Red Dog is usually the Rx.

      • CPRM

        Digby gets it. *Grabs another beer*

      • Festus

        Eight solid hours and two mugs of tea. Lotsa cigs and three hours to countdown always works for me until it doesn’t.

      • I. B. McGinty

        No kidding. I shut everything down over the winter and then proceeded to pile up a bunch of junk in my work space.

  4. JaimeRoberto Delecto

    Quatro!

    • JaimeRoberto Delecto

      First time a Mexican was early for anything.

      Just kidding.

      Not really.

  5. I. B. McGinty

    There is a Mexican restaurant close by that has shuttered and I really miss going there because they are so nice and the food is awesome. I hope they reopen, but if they start serving breakfast I might not leave.

    • juris imprudent

      I’ve got shredded beef in the freezer, may be time to make some machaca this weekend.

  6. UnCivilServant

    Huh. I was about to go to sleep, and the morning links drop.

    • CPRM

      Time to wake up!

  7. CPRM

    Good Friday and Easter were to be my first ever ‘paid holidays’ if I weren’t scheduled, thanks asshats for taking that from me. That’s like a grown-up job milestone!

    • Florida Man

      Sorry, buddy. Hopefully the world will pull its head out of its collective ass before we destroy the modern world.

      • nw

        It’s a little late to hope world war one isn’t going to happen.

    • Nephilium

      Sorry to hear that man.

    • Festus

      Sucks. I remember being so new to the job that you didn’t get stat pay. I’ll be doing double time and a half on Sunday. So I’ll be making a pittance but it 2-1/2 times the pittance that I’m rationed.

  8. UnCivilServant

    They all made fun of those of us hedging our bets in gold. Who’s laughing now!?

    I’m annoyed at the article writer. Gold-Silver alloy has a name, it’s Electrum.

    • CPRM

      And you make it with urine, not lead! *Hides alchemy notes*

    • I. B. McGinty

      Electrum sounds like a stripper’s name.

      • Festus

        Electrum sounds like her whiny daughter’s name when you wake up too late to gnaw your arm off and make your escape.

  9. Florida Man

    Happy Good Friday…wait, my catholic wife tells me it’s NOT a happy occasion. I’m haz a confuse.

    • Nephilium

      Sure it’s a happy occasion, it means (in Catholic households) meats back on the menu for Friday nights going forward.

  10. Digby is still NOT a Naked Intruder

    I refuse to feel bad if the following catch the Pangolin Panic: Allysa Milano, Bernie Sanders, his shield-bearers at the NYT, Gavin Newsome, his shield-bearers in the various CA Sheriff’s depts.

    I could go on, but, I’ll let those hang in the air for a while.

    • Florida Man

      Ignore them. You’ll be happier and they don’t know you hate them anyways.

      • Digby is still NOT a Naked Intruder

        Well, I’m not out tracing their steps (that you know), but, they* are actively trying to fuck our lives even more. If they don’t make it, I won’t weep.

        *OK, the CA contingent, not quite as much. For me.

    • Festus

      Time-Cop! You guys are posting from the Future!

  11. grrizzly

    Once a glitch in the matrix happens, nothing is surprising anymore.

    • bacon-magic

      *black cat walks past

      • See Double You

        **black cat walks past

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I noticed the Guardian has disabled commenting on the Boris articles lately. Even with as much as they hate him, they probably didn’t want the loons out in force on their site.

      • Tejicano

        An unexpected modicum of decency.

      • AlexinCT

        More like they wanted to cover their asses, is my guess.

    • Festus

      My Hippy buddy from work when I told him John Prine just died – “And yet Boris Johnson lives!” I don’t feature. Why so evil? Show us on the intersectional map what the Bad Orange Man did to you. Use the push pins.

      • Festus

        Oh yeah, he’s an acoustic “singer-song-writer” that doesn’t know about John Prine…

  12. mexican sharpshooter

    Goddamnit

    • Certified Public Asshat

      It’s okay, he will rise again.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Who, The South?

  13. Rebel Scum

    Mexican Good Friday morning links!

    Links that will come back to haunt me?

    • Nephilium

      Unlike Chinese ones which will leave you wanting more an hour later?

      • Nephilium

        Mmmmm… samosas, naan, and vindaloo.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        My wife doesn’t like Indian food, so I don’t have it much anymore. That said, my mouth is watering thinking about it.

      • PieInTheSky

        Be careful vindaloo can be spicy

      • Nephilium

        At least I don’t need to argue for spicy Indian food like I do for spicy Chinese food. Tell an Indian place you want it spicy, and they’ll oblige.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        I once made the mistake of ordering my meal “Indian spicy”… Didn’t shit right for 3 days

      • Nephilium

        Most of the places around me do a scale of 1-10. I usually order 8, I did a 10 the first time I ordered from them, and it left a mark. There was a Thai place near where I used to work that had a Thai spicy option on top of the 1-10 scale. That was disappointing.

      • PieInTheSky

        I had the spiciest dish at an proper indian indian restaurant in sheffield uk. It was a 2 pint plate of curry in that i needed two pints of beer to get through it

      • juris imprudent

        Trashy – that same mistake can be made in Thai restaurants, particularly those associated with Esaan region.

      • robc

        A Thai place in Louisville has a 1-5 scale, 5 is “Thai Hot” , I vacillated between 3 and 4. Technically their scale was open ended. A friend of mine who likes things very spicy and always ordered the 5, jumped to 7 once. He went right back to 5 after that.

        Apparently the record is 14.

  14. PieInTheSky

    What makes this particular friday so good?

    Cant complain though it is sunny and i am out of the appartment at my moms house by the lake. The pear and cherry trees are in full bloom and the apple tree is a few days away. The almond has flowers although we never got anybalmonds from it

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      What makes this particular friday so good?

      They tortured some dude to death for not showing the proper respect to their “say shalom” orders.

      • SDF-7

        All in preparation for someone who came back from the dead who isn’t a blood-sucker, Pie… so the rest of the world prefers that to y’all’s undead hordes, sorry.

      • PieInTheSky

        Is this to do with irish independence?

      • Certified Public Asshat

        So Jesus was a libertarian?

      • Gender Traitor

        Rendering unto Caesar is theft!

      • Festus

        Still two feet of snow on the flat but grass is trying on the south slope.

      • creech

        Jesus was just being a wiseguy. He knew nothing belonged to Caesar.

    • Nephilium

      So after two days in the 60’s, we had a bad thunderstorm blow through, then a frost, then snow, and we’re back in the 30’s today with snow predicted. Anyone who tried to plant their garden early is unhappy.

      Lousy Smarch weather.

      • AlmightyJB

        Yeah, our heat was turned off. Was 62 in the house this morning.

      • PieInTheSky

        Now it is 24 and sunny but there was an april frost ladt week. I think the apricot trees are not giving fruit this year

      • juris imprudent

        Wild shit blew thru here last night – wind, graupel, more wind. Still very windy but clear now.

      • Not Adahn

        Snow this morning.

    • Count Potato

      Good Friday is “Good Friday” in Romanian? I thought it was based on Latin. In Spanish, Italian, and French it’s Holy Friday.

      • PieInTheSky

        I think you mean the friday before easter, which is next friday. That is vinerea mare in Romanian, which means big or great friday

      • Not Adahn

        Vinera mare doesn’t mean “horse wine?”

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        Hmm, I never realized that Orthodox have Easter on a different day than Western denominations.

        Learn something new every day.

      • UnCivilServant

        The calculation of the date of easter is one of those things that contributed to the fragmentation.

        I still don’t understand why it floats instead of being an actual anniversary.

      • leon

        I have some gripes with the Council of Nicea too…

      • robc

        It doesnt float. But it is based on the jewish calendar which has leap months, so it floats in the Gregorian Calendar.

        Well, that isn’t technically right, that is how Passover is calculated, and Easter is usually the Sunday after Passover. But, for some reason, the early Catholic church decided to do the calculation on their own. I think the Orthodox one may still line up with Passover every year, or maybe they have their own alternate calculation.

      • kbolino

        I still don’t understand why it floats instead of being an actual anniversary

        As far as I know, there are no Julian dates in the Bible, and those are the only dates from antiquity we can reliably align to a modern calendar.

      • Rhywun

        In German it’s “Lamentation Friday”.

      • AlexinCT

        Cause no shisse porn?

  15. Not Adahn

    Buenos dias mi hermanx.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      buenos dias.

    • Nephilium

      Good job people down in Columbus!

      • AlmightyJB

        I really need to start listening to afternoon local radio call in show to find out what’s really going on. Other local media are just government ass lickers so you’ll hear nothing from them. I Would usually listen to it on way home from work but now I don’t have that drive. I might have to take a day or two off work week of 4/20 and join them. I would like to now but just got off week and a half vacation. Gotta plow them fields, and feed them chickens. The longer we go with no major death rates, the less defensible these actions become.

      • UnCivilServant

        MGM refunded my event tickets for the time I was going to be in Vegas.

        No word on whether they’ll refund the no refunds hotel rooms.

      • Gender Traitor

        Ouch.

        Dispute the charges if the hotels don’t issue refunds.

      • UnCivilServant

        Several months after the fact, and having already paid the credit card bill for that month?

      • UnCivilServant

        I should note, I have not yet asked for anything. The show tickets got refunded because the show was cancelled. At first they were going “call and schedule another time”, but have just switched to refunding.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Yes.* If you purchase a future service such as an airline ticket or a hotel room, it’s based on when it’s to be provided not the date of purchase.

      • Nephilium

        For Viva, they offered to refund tickets, or roll them over to next year’s event. They worked with the hosting hotel who offered the same options, it means that I don’t need to get up (or stay up) before the sun rises to get the hotel reservation for next year at least.

        Of course, I’m going to be sitting on a crapload of credit with the airlines if the trip to Europe has to be cancelled (and they don’t refund in cash).

      • UnCivilServant

        Later today I might see if anyone answers the hotel reservations line and see how flexible they’ll be, since I was not part of some big event.

      • Gustave Lytton

        If they’re jerks or hurting, they may want to steer you to a house credit or adjust your dates to the future. If they’re shut during your original booking date, I’d push for a refund unless those options are aceptable to you.

      • UnCivilServant

        If I can change from two rooms over one night to one room over two nights, just moving to a different set of dates would be fine, and I’ll take a solo trip some other time.

    • Drake

      Good

  16. Rebel Scum

    Her husband, hearing a baby’s cries, removed her pants to reveal the newborn’s head while their daughters, aged 2 and 12, witnessed the event

    And now they are scarred for life.

    “This horrific case is just the most recent and one of the most egregious examples of this agency’s abuse,” said ACLU attorney Monika Y. Langarica.

    Did anyone know she was pregnant?

    “Thanks to the medical resources available in our stations, this woman and her child were well cared for and received immediate medical attention,” said Chief Patrol Agent Aaron Heitke.

    That’s some mighty fine abuse there, Aaron.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    It’s communism. The answer is always communism.

    Overheated rents are blamed in part for the rise in homelessness and “deaths of despair,” as well as the need for 13 million Americans to take on more than one job. More than a third of U.S. homes are rented. The median price for a two-bedroom apartment in San Francisco is $3,102; in New York, $2,565; and in Boston, $2,125.

    Housing and homelessness experts continue to argue over the solution, from building more housing to fighting gentrification, but the halted economy could end up being the ultimate down force.

    “Rents will fall,” said David Shulman, a senior economist with the Anderson Forecast at UCLA. “But income is going to drop.”

    ——-

    “America has a two-pronged problem on its hands: a coronavirus recession that will push families out onto the streets and a weak social safety net that will fail to catch them,” Aaron Carr, founder of New York City’s Housing Rights Initiative, said in an email. “If Congress doesn’t make rental assistance universal, they will be doing an extraordinary disservice not just to countless families, but the country they claim to love.”

    This is our big chance to re-make America. Don’t let it get away!

    • PieInTheSky

      fighting gentrification is great because that demand just goes away

      building more housing – this is madness

      • AlexinCT

        For these people increased supply is never the answer unless government does it and that supply is more concerned with turning occupants into drones.

    • WTF

      Oh sure, big daddy government picking up part of the tab won’t result in higher rents.
      Just like college tuition.

    • Rhywun

      What big-city mayor has ever said “we want cheaper housing and the lower tax receipts that come with it” and meant it? None of them. But the “activists” seem to buy their lies. That’s how you get “affordable housing” that isn’t affordable and regulations which ensure that only “luxury” housing can be built.

  18. SDF-7

    Morning / happy late nite all.

    As far as The Shat goes — I’m still really fond of this one.

    • Nephilium

      I was expecting this.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        A true classic

      • Rhywun

        LOL I didn’t know he was doing that in the 70s.

      • Nephilium

        Once again… I was expecting this.

      • The Hyperbole

        People just don’t do drugs like they used to.

      • Shirley Knott

        The consequences of which we now see all around us.
        Bring back the drugs!

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Hottie in the yellow sweatshirt.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    Cant complain though it is sunny and i am out of the appartment at my moms house by the lake. The pear and cherry trees are in full bloom and the apple tree is a few days away. The almond has flowers although we never got anybalmonds from it

    Enjoy it while you can. We’ll all be dead in a few days.

    • Not Adahn

      Aren’t almonds one of those crops you need to bring in bees to have them produce?

      • SDF-7

        I don’t know if you *have* to — but I do know the orchards around here have hives transported in periodically.

      • PieInTheSky

        There are plenty of bees around though most are in the cherry trees. What i dont know if the almond tree self polinates or you need two at least. We only have the one

      • SDF-7

        DuckDuckGo search and this site say “Yes, you need two”

      • Not Adahn

        I thought that was common knowledge

        “stay away from me if you’re contagious”

    • PieInTheSky

      All good restaurants are small and hipster

  20. The Late P Brooks

    So yesterday, I and a few friends (I have friends, honest! Don’t spoil it for me.) engaged in a little civil disobedience, sitting outside drinking and talking on a sunny sidewalk. People drove by and stared. Some waved, some didn’t. At least the cops didn’t roll up and do a Karen check on us.

    This was in Livingston. I doubt you could pull that off on Main Street in Bozeman without getting rousted.

    It’s very depressing, listening to people regurgitate all the media hysterical talking points. I guess the new talking point is, “Well, maybe SOME people don’t die right away, but their systems are so ravaged, they die of something else, shortly after they recover.”

    How old were those people? Doesn’t matter.

    • AlexinCT

      PEOPLE DIED!

  21. Nephilium

    In the daily beer industry news from me, COVID-19 Update: Stone Brewing Cuts Workforce; States Try to Extend Business Interruption Insurance Coverage Claims. For those in the insurance/legal industry, this little piece jumped out at me:

    Business interruption insurance, if included in a policy, is paid out when a business cannot operate normally due to physical damage, such as a fire or flood. Closures due to pandemic are often specifically excluded from coverage, according to Insurance Journal.

    However, some state governments are working to change that.

    So… is changing the contract after the event going to fly?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It’s an open question whether or not my business interruption insurance covers pandemics. I know it specifically excludes terrorism.

      • Swiss Servator

        When the G forces it, there is 99.999% of the time, an exclusion.

    • Translucent Chum

      NJ is going to force insurers to pay for it, even though it’s not part of the policy. All regular HO3 policies have an exclusion for gov’t action (if you recall the house that got demolished by the SWAT team).

      • Translucent Chum

        Crap. HO3 and Commercial policies exclude gov’t action.

      • WTF

        What basis of law is there for forcing an entity to pay for something that they are not contractually obligated to pay for, and have no legal liability for?
        Other than FYTW of course.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I think we’re well beyond any semblance of contract integrity anymore.

        The insurers will suck it up because they don’t want to jeopardize their bailout later.

      • Swiss Servator

        I believe any state that did that would face massive legal action, and a sudden dearth of insurers. States don’t have the ability to “bail out” anyone.

      • leon

        sudden dearth of insurers

        …. Something something…. Bad Luck /

        Ayn Rand Brave New World

      • kbolino

        States don’t have the ability to “bail out” anyone.

        They do when the fedgov backstops them…

      • Translucent Chum

        You got it. During Sandy (the SUPERSTORM!@!@11) they didn’t allow hurricane deductibles to be applied because…

      • creech

        Justice Roberts knows this answer.

    • WTF

      So… is changing the contract after the event going to fly?

      It’s covered under the FYTW clause of the constitution.

    • Rhywun

      So… is changing the contract after the event going to fly?

      Sure, if you want to put every insurance company out of business.

      • Translucent Chum

        You’ll note a lot of insurance companies have a separate entity that handles NJ.

    • Count Potato

      No idea how it could be monetized.

  22. Translucent Chum

    Swiss hardest hit.

    World’s Worst Mayor Slaps 9 PM Curfew on Chicago Liquor Sales for No Reason

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It’s so nobody gets beaten up by roving gangs of MAGA hat wearers after dark.

    • PieInTheSky

      I think i told the glibs about the time i lost my temper in a Barcelona supermarket because i was trying to buy beer and it was 23:01 and you cant sell beer between 23 and 7. Off course there were people selling beer in the streets and the locals were annoyed by this. Then again 1 euro for a can of estrella damm 8 years ago was a ripoff

    • Swiss Servator

      I am not in Chicago …. I am in the enlightened suburbs (covers up snortlaugh). In fact, my local has curbside pick up, and will deliver within 5 miles…

    • Rhywun

      Guessing this has more to do with punishing the sorts of people she imagines hang out at liquor stores than anything related to the ‘vid.

  23. PieInTheSky

    Goddamn it i am trying to take in the sun in the garden and goddamn ants are climbing on me. Stupid ants

    • AlmightyJB

      I thought the garlic you all wear around your necks would repel the ants as well.

    • Not Adahn

      Cough on them and within two weeks the hills will all be dead.

      Or just pour some molten aluminum into their nests.

    • Pope Jimbo

      What? Are you disappointed because it wasn’t your creepy uncle crawling on you?

    • robc

      Fire ants.

      Probably not, as you weren’t typing in screams.

      I have sat on a fire ant hill. Do not recommend.

      • UnCivilServant

        What is actually effective at dealing with fire ants? So far all I’ve heard is “flood nests with molten metal”

      • The Last American Hero

        See if the local zoo will let you borrow a tapir.

      • robc

        Cold weather. They havent moved too far north for a reason.

      • Spartacus

        My father used to use gasoline and a match. Not environmentally friendly, but effective.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    Mure from tyhe housing story:

    Some experts believe the impact of the coronavirus on the economy could upend housing in the U.S., with density pressure in markets like New York, Los Angeles and San Francisco giving way to renewed migration to the suburbs.

    Low interest rates could prompt higher-income city renters to consider buying in the suburbs, people who are sharing rooms and apartments could lose a taste for it after social distancing, and employers may shift permanently to using remote workers who would no longer have to live nearby, said Shulman of UCLA.

    “People may rethink if they want to be urban or suburban,” he said.

    He believes the housing market will get over this latest crisis, but it will take “a long time.”

    Yukelson of the Los Angeles apartment association called the coronavirus economy “temporary insanity.”

    People might re-think hipster urbanism? Preposterous.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Oh well. Seems an appropriate place for a threading fuckup.

      • Count Potato

        creepy

      • Sean

        Ewwww.

    • Drake

      I sure hope so. I assume the coming recession will kill my home value unless people are looking to escape to a house on over an acre near a state forest where “social distance” is the norm.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        *puts fingers in ears*

        Lalalalala can’t hear you

        /guy who lives on an acre near a state forest and has a for sale sign in the front yard.

    • Rhywun

      I’m all for bursting the rent bubble.

    • creech

      Wonder if New Yorkers will keep crowding into jammed packed elevators in order to work in 50 story office buildings with 1,000 strangers breathing on you?

      • Not Adahn

        Those are some pretty big elevators

      • Rhywun

        When this all blows over, sure, why not?

  25. The Late P Brooks

    Me tupe goos.

    • PieInTheSky

      Ewww gross

      • Q Continuum

        We still love you Pie, even if your opinion on tits is objectively wrong.

    • Don Escaped 1PHJ1

      leg man hear, but, your right:

      I don’t brag about most places because I don’t want to share them (TN sucks, by the way, you’d hate it hearre)

      but, especially if you like to hike, Big Bend is a nearly unique experience

      * just wanted to see if Ted was awake yet *

      • juris imprudent

        Funny you should mention how TN sucks, the property prices out around Tazewell have caught my eye – I like what I could buy out there (thinking retirement).

      • Don Escaped 1PHJ1

        / Don Pardo voice ON

        Come on DOWN !!

        / Don Pardo voice OFF

        FirstWife’s dad moved that way in the seventies but got ahead of himself with a retirement place further in the woods, a place he couldn’t routinely visit. The locals stole his fruit trees right out of the ground.

        But, yeah, it’s beautiful. The entire state is beautiful really, in its own way.

      • UnCivilServant

        The locals stole his fruit trees right out of the ground.

        Who does that?

    • creech

      Why is #9 wearing a top? I always thought hot tubs were for nakedness.

  26. Ted S.

    Regarding the blurb on the front page, it’s Viernes Santo, at least according to Wikipedia.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    So… is changing the contract after the event going to fly?

    This is America. Holding people to the terms of their contracts is unfair.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Now that’s how you satire.

    • mrfamous

      Now THAT one got a good laugh

  28. Don Escaped 1PHJ1

    We watched the )))(((???Unorthodox???)))((( series and rather enjoyed it.

    Then came the obligatory HOW IT WAS MADE epilogue with the ally the cloying and self-congratulation which is fine but I wondered: who’s editing this?
    a/ exHasidic writer: this is so important because I never got to watch or read anything about me, to see stories about me, that relate to me!
    b/ 24 year old executive producer type 20 seconds later: because, you know, these really are universal stories

    * Suthen-esque face-palm *
    * runs to bathroom to wash face and hands *

    • WTF

      a/ exHasidic writer: this is so important because I never got to watch or read anything about me, to see stories about me, that relate to me

      Because The Chosen and Yentl never happened? There are probably more but those are just off the top of my head.

      • Nephilium

        There was even a plotline about Hasidics in the Sopranos, which I’m sure was completely accurate and sensitive to the culture.

    • PieInTheSky

      There was an article in the local press how the sect in that show originated in satu mare which is in Romania these days

  29. Drake

    Pat Buchanan frames the issue pretty well. Trump has a big decision to make soon. Listen to his economic advisors or his medical bureaucrats on when to reopen the economy.

    Trump’s Presidency Hangs on One Decision

    • UnCivilServant

      The correct decision is to arrest every governer who issued an illegal cower in place order and prosecute them for violating the constitutional rights of their citizens. Then proceed down the chain of command of the enforcers who prosecuted violations.

      • WTF

        LITERALLY HITLER!!!1!!!!

      • WTF

        I’ll admit yours is better, though.

      • Don Escaped 1PHJ1

        ja wohl, herr Kommandant !

        / city cop fever-jacking it after chasing joggers out of the park

      • WTF

        They were JUST FOLLOWING ORDERS…
        Oh!

      • leon

        I don’t make the Orders sir, i just execute them with extreme prejudice.

      • Tejicano

        Does it show how jaded I am that I expected this to be Babylonbee?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Me too.

        So the officers involved in an illegal arrest were fired on the spot and then taken into custody, right?

      • Q Continuum

        Many out-of-staters have second homes in the mountains here. A group of well-heeled Texans have already launched a Constitutional challenge to Gunnison county for preventing them from entering their property.

        I hope that kind of stuff, along with AJB’s protests in Columbus, spreads like wild fire and local pols get taken to the woodshed.

      • juris imprudent

        I’m sure the county was willing to forgive them their property taxes.

    • Q Continuum

      “Yes, this could be a false dawn. We are warned of the possibility that the coronavirus, after cutting its initial murderous swath by August, could revisit us in the fall with a new season of lethal attacks.”

      Well in that case, I guess we need to keep everything shut down indefinitely. After people run out of food, we can have the National Guard distribute MREs from the tanks rolling down the streets. Just be sure to liquidate any saboteurs or wreckers trying to work or exploit their comrades during this unprecedented time of crisis.

      • WTF

        Or, you know, we could just lock down the vulnerable populations and let everyone else go about their lives so they can build immunity and limit the spread if it reemerges in the fall.

      • Count Potato

        I’m no epidemiologist, but other than a vaccine (which seems a long way off) how does this shit end without herd immunity (relatively healthy people catching and surviving it)?

      • leon

        What shit is gonna be funny is them requiring that you go to the polls with a Face mask. Because they can force you to wear a face mask at your own cost to vote, but not get a damn ID.

      • Fatty Bolger

        could revisit us in the fall with a new season of lethal attacks

        Just like every year with the flu, pneumonia, and lot of other unknown viruses.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      Justin yesterday said ‘we’re not getting back to normal until we find a vaccine’ but didn’t give any examples of what he meant by this. It unnerved me because I’ve been hearing this from both countries. This has left me pessimistic.

      I’ve been saying stop listening to the medical bureaucrats (I have a doctor friend said this is the best route and that I shouldn’t worry about my business. This is when I got depressed and realized we have to OPEN the economy as soon as it’s reasonable – and sooner than later), and that I pray Trump opens up because this will force Canada’s hand. Quebec’s premier is already predisposed to want to open the economy (he’s a former successful businessman) so he gets more than most this has to be.

      Canadian officials are estimating 11 000 to 22 000 deaths. Ok. But you want to ruin the lives of millions for this? We’re asking a specific segment of the population (e.g jobs in certain industries that can easily be cut like restaurants and small business owners) to pay the price. Corporations – and their employees – get to stay open and ride the wave. This is absurdly unfair. Either you shut down the entire economy or you open the damn thing up. It’s illogical (and immoral I say) what they’re doing.

      The stress about whether I will have a business (if dumbass Canadians go along with Justin and cheer on the 1 year ban as I’ve seen already) by the time this ends will kill me before this damn fricken virus will.

      Nothing is making sense and I’m starting to look for more ‘cui bono?’ explanations.

      They’re throwing people into the streets but the banks, when all is said and done, want their fucken money and from this point on everyone leans on everybody to get their fucken money.

      • WTF

        An extended shut-down of the economy will be far more damaging than letting the virus run its course. The reaction has been completely insane.

      • AlexinCT

        BUT PEOPLE ARE DYING RHEEEEE!

        There is some other agenda at work here, but I can’t really put my finger on it…..

    • robc

      The “purpose” of the shutdown was to flatten the curve so that hospitals wont get overrun. Since we are well under that, except maybe in NY, other states should be opening up to deflatten the curve to get to herd immunity.

      Technically, we overflattened.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    It was a bold, decisive move that – frankly speaking – took a lot of guts and will have saved many lives.

    Aaaaand fuck you, Motley Fool writer.

    I haven’t seen a single tiger since I bought this special rock!

    • mrfamous

      The ‘tiger repelling rock’ argument is already out in full force on Twitter. If the deaths wind up at something like 50,000 instead of the 2.2 million estimate that kicked this thing into high gear, you’re not even using neurons if you argue that kind of difference is due to “mitigation efforts.” ‘Fucking love science’ my ass.

      • kbolino

        If the actual number is well below the predicted number for the scenario that was carried out, it generally does not prove anything except that the model being used was flawed and/or was given bad inputs.

    • Festus

      I mentioned in the last post that if I show up (coquettishly) there will be interruptions. Seems like people trapped at home like to overload the net. Ours likes to go out for ten minutes every hour or so. Stupid plague.

  31. Rebel Scum


    James Woods
    @RealJamesWoods
    ·
    17h

    This is fledgling communism in all its glory…
    Quote Tweet

    Sally Kohn
    @sallykohn
    · 23h

    I’m really tired of reading how business owners are “forced” to layoff workers. No one made them do that. They *chose* to do that. Not saying it isn’t a hard choice, during a hard time, but to say they were *forced* obscures their agency AND casts owners/CEOs as the victims.

    • WTF

      Does Sally Kohn actually believe this? Is she actually this delusional, or does she know she is full of shit and is just evil?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yes, she has a very long history of saying very stupid things.

      • juris imprudent

        So, we commend her for her consistency?

      • Certified Public Asshat

        They still have the choice to keep paying them and then go completely under. The choice is theirs!

      • AlexinCT

        These fuckers believe employers should just fucking lose the business before they dare lay off people to try and save the entity. Making the choice to save your business is never based on understanding the laws of economics, but evil because SJW types believe everyone should take it in the ass and never stress them. They want to get us to a point where everything is just handed to people for existing, because earning shit is hard work and for suckers.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I find that non-profits which stay in business by raising money from government or donors have little to no concept of how supply/demand work even though they are technically in business.

        The same goes for talking heads that get paid to bloviate. Kohn qualifies for all those distinctions.

    • leon

      casts owners/CEOs as the victims

      They Aren’t? They aren’t the victim of a massive taking? Also i don’t like the implication that laying off people is immoral and they are only absolved because they were forced. She’s right no one “Forced” them to layoff. They Just were forced to not get any revenue. The idea that they should be morally obliged to then spend whatever savings they have to maintain payroll for something they are not making any money through is immoral.

      • Rebel Scum

        It’s like a flip on how they say that X is “forced” to make a voluntary choice to pay for Y and they are just going to “ask” (at gunpoint) Z to pay more taxes. And, of course, ignores that the government is forcing them to stop all commerce.

      • leon

        I shouldn’t be forced to pay for birth control!!!

        Also what Sally is doing here is trying to absolve the State from any implications of the pain. The pain is being caused by all those evil business owners who want to keep all their money. The State had no choice – they had to save lives – those nasty businesses are conniving jerks trying to make the state look bad.

        why would sally do this? Because she’s big brothers basic bitch.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      Honey, twat if I may, when the government shuts a small business down they’re in effect ‘forcing’ them to layoff workers.

      Oh, I know I’ve read people say ‘there should be six months reserves for rainy days!’ and ‘you’re not a good business if you can’t handle this!’ but these are mostly illiberal economic and business illiterates who usually say this. I definitely sympathize with the former and I’m sure some do, but it’s best to realize it’s very hard to do this with high taxes. Most of ‘free cash’ from revenues gets eaten up by measures to protect employees, rent and other superfluous costs – fixed or otherwise. So with a small business, the margin to manoeuvre is very tight and can take a lot of months if not years to save up – if at all. Many businesses survive on LOC or credit just to survive ‘slow months’ and they steer the boat under such circumstances.

      But this one? This is something else. One minute you have revenues coming in, the next POOF. Nothing by government edict. Explain to me how this was THEIR CHOICE you frighteningly stupid person?

      • Nephilium

        Oh, I know I’ve read people say ‘there should be six months reserves for rainy days!’ and ‘you’re not a good business if you can’t handle this!’ but these are mostly illiberal economic and business illiterates who usually say this

        But the workers shouldn’t have a six month reserve for rainy days?

        I’d like to note that the tax collection is still ongoing, and unending.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The workers don’t have a six month reserve because the fat capitalist pigs that employ them have stolen it from them. Thus why employers have a six month payroll reserve sitting in their bank account.

        /proglogic

      • leon

        These comments are being made by someone who sees the world as only a struggle between business and worker. The State is just a beneficent actor helping the poor worker. That is why the business owner cannot be the victim. Sally Kohn might as well walk around with a sign that says “I Suck Statist Dick for Free”

      • Rebel Scum

        Suck Statist Dick

        More like licks the statist twat, amirte?

      • Not Adahn

        GENITAL CONFIGURATION IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT!

      • creech

        Let’s not forget that the IRS looks unkindly at corporations which build up huge reserves of cash instead of paying them out in dividends so they can be taxed.
        This cunte sees nothing wrong with forcing employers to pay out their last dime, but probably thinks it is criminal to make a person show I.D. before voting.

      • leon

        Shes Absolutley out of touch and evil:

        Sally Kohn
        @sallykohn
        ·
        23h
        Replying to
        @sallykohn
        Oh Lordy, Twitter. Grasp the nuance of what I’m saying. I am NOT saying that it’s not a hard, sometimes impossible decision. But it’s still a DECISION. A CHOICE. Think about the meaning/implications of the word forced. No one is literally being forced to layoff workers.
        Sally Kohn
        @sallykohn
        ·
        23h
        AND that attitude in general, that business owners/CEOs take certain steps because they HAVE TO as opposed to because they CHOOSE TO, helps mask exploitation of workers in general in a million other ways — “have no choice” but to pay low wages, no benefits, etc.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        She’s mentally defective. The government (egged on by the evil media) said ‘shut down and lay off workers so they can get financial aid’.

        She’s not understanding that they had NO choice. What was the option? Stay open, get fined or arrested, for putting workers in danger while not allowing them the chance to get unemployment?

        Is she that retarded? I think she is.

      • leon

        Is she that retarded? I think she is.

        I’m past saying that people like her are Dumb. She’s college educated. She knows exactly what she is saying, and why she is saying it.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        This. She is evil, manipulative, and agenda-driven. Sometimes that has the appearance of stupidity to those who aren’t driven by the same agenda.

      • Tres Cool

        I dont know her history, but Im going to bet that she’s never run a business, or had to pay employees.

    • Tejicano

      She’s right. They could actually hire twice as many people and pay them all to stay home. Everybody knows all businesses are literally money trees. The business owners might have to cut back to only one Rolls Royce per year instead of four like usual. They were probably mean to somebody once and deserve it.

    • kbolino

      Somehow business owners have complete and total agency in spite of government orders, and yet politicians have no agency whatsoever despite being in charge of said government.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    I’m really tired of reading how business owners are “forced” to layoff workers. No one made them do that.

    Que?

    • The Hyperbole

      Look, fat, if those owners haven’t liquidated every asset they have then the layoffs were a choice. If they still sleep in a bed or have a car to drive then they made a choice to stiff their workers.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The world is a better place when we continue to provide supply for non-existent demand. Duh.

      • leon

        Supply? who gives a shit about that. Who cares about producing things. But once you have hired someone you are morally obligated to provide them a paycheck for the end of time or until they quit.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        By definition, supplying labor produces value. It’s like you don’t even Marx.

      • leon

        I… I have failed comrade…. I submit myself to the gulag.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        No worries comrade, we will reeducate you and you will behold the glory of Historical Materialism.

      • Translucent Chum

        Hi, France!

  33. The Late P Brooks

    Pat Buchanan? Is he still alive?

    • Drake

      Yep – and now popular with some for calling lots of things correctly a few decades ago.

    • Don Escaped 1PHJ1

      He hasn’t made McLaughlin Group in two weeks FWIW

      • Not Adahn

        They’re still producing the McLaughlin Group without McLaughlin?

        That’s like Van Halen kicking Eddie out.

      • Rhywun

        IKR

      • Rufus the Monocled

        He was by far the best one.

        His knowledge of American political history is second to none.

        Come at me.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Bye BYE!

      • robc

        I didnt realize Eddie was that big of a history guy.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Eddie Van Halen is a national treasure, and I will not have you drag his good name through the mud.

        No matter how warranted your charge may be,

    • Not Adahn

      With respct to Suthen and the Minnieglibs, I’m not living in a mosquito-infested swamp.

      • UnCivilServant

        Just because we don’t have as many mosquitos per capita doesn’t mean New York isn’t a Mosquito infested swamp.

      • Not Adahn

        I noticed a surprising amount of marshland in the Adirondacks. I chose not to stop in those towns.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s appropriate that Liberland would be located between two entities that despise each other.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I bet both entities only agree on one thing. That Liberland sucks and is the root of all the problems affecting their countries.

      • Fatty Bolger

        But they’re free mosquitos.

      • Gender Traitor

        Do they gambol?

  34. Rebel Scum

    Whitey, you got a lotta ‘spainin’ to do.

    “Men — especially white men have a big responsibility to make amends for the Trump era,” Moore said on Thursday. “Those amends will happen. People will see the error of their ways.” It’s worth noting that, in the 2016 election, Trump won 52 percent of white women votes and 52 percent of the male vote overall.

    Moore also said the days of white men being the dominant demographic in the U.S. are numbered. “They will be the minority. They’re already the minority.”

    • Drake

      I feel like we collectively have to make amends for Michael Moore first.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        You would be forgiven for thinking Moore would have given up after Friedman publicly handed his ass to him so many years ago.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9f9lsbctZA

      • juris imprudent

        Can’t be the real Michael Moore – yes he was annoying enough, but I don’t believe Mikey wasn’t ever not Cartman-esque.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Moore said as he cowered in his mansion’s bunker.

      • Rhywun

        Seriously. His racist, sexist schtick has probably enriched him more in the last three years than ever. He should be thanking Trump.

    • Fatty Bolger

      “They”, MIchael?

    • Q Continuum

      They’ve always been the minority shithead. About 51-52% of the population is female.

      Just hurry up and have your massive coronary so you shut up.

      • Tejicano

        If the Chicom cough doesn’t get him first.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      This kind of talk and mentality is precisely why the West is weak from within.

      The asshole is actually cheering on the demise of white men.

      • Not Adahn

        I note a definite lack of autoeuthanization in his daily activities.

      • Festus

        I don’t understand the problem. Sure, some white guys have been cuntes to me in the long run but I’ve been fucked over worse by “colored” folk.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      Do people actually still believe this fat shithead’s ‘aw shucks’ baseball cap wearing shtick?

      • Festus

        About 47 percent. Means he’s gonna win.

    • The Last American Hero

      Trump should have snatched him in the middle of the night and shipped him to Havana for his own safety during the corona panic.

    • kbolino

      I’ll take, how do third-world despotic governments justify their continued existence for $1000, Alex.

  35. Festus

    When I pried my eyes open this afternoon and went for my morning constitutional, one of the videos was Debbie Harry in a tiny black dress circa fap-land. I wanted to share it with you guys but can’t find it now. She was wearing a black wig and shades.

    • Festus

      How did I miss this? It’s gone into the Aether.

      • Drake

        Any other erotic dreams you’d like to share?

      • WTF

        Because Dreamin’, dreaming is free

    • Count Potato

      HAWT

      • Festus

        Just pisses me off. It was there and suddenly it wasn’t. Much like my internet service.

  36. Rebel Scum

    Amateurs.

    The death toll from Iranians guzzling pure alcohol in the crazy misbelief that it can cure the coronavirus has reached about 600 — with thousands more hospitalized, according to reports on Wednesday.

    “The numbers are very high and are beyond our expectations,” Iranian judicial spokesman Gholam Hossein Esmaili told a state-run news service, according to the Mirror.

    • Drake

      That is one hard core frat.

      • Pope Jimbo

        To be fair, to rush their frat you have to fuck a camel, not some sissy ass goat like weak frat boys in the USA. You can be sure you need a couple extra hits of moonshine for that.

      • Festus

        Easy-peasey if you’re a camel jockey.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        No camel. Butt too high. Run too fast.

    • leon

      The death toll from Iranians guzzling pure alcohol in the crazy misbelief that it can cure the coronavirus has reached about 600

      Crazy? Looks like it saved 600 people from dying to coronavirus.

      • Not Adahn

        And if it saves one life…

      • J. Frank Parnell

        Looks like it saved 600 people from dying to coronavirus.

        Don’t be silly. It caused 600 coronavirus-related deaths.

    • creech

      Blame it on Trump. By being a notorious alcohol abstainer, he tempted these poor TDS wogs to overindulge.

    • mrfamous

      “state run news service”

      And would someone like to point me to the Iranian ‘news service’ that isn’t?

    • AlexinCT

      That’s cause ya gone pussy when ya do that.

  37. The Late P Brooks

    Justin yesterday said ‘we’re not getting back to normal until we find a vaccine’ but didn’t give any examples of what he meant by this. It unnerved me because I’ve been hearing this from both countries. This has left me pessimistic.

    That’s what Bill Gates says. And if Bill Gates says, it, it’s incontrovertibly true.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Bill has become somewhat disconnected from economic action in the past couple of decades.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Maybe but I fear this belief will gain traction and prevail. Now they’re just gonna string us along. ‘Let’s wait until May 4. Ok. We’re not sure. Let’s push it to June 4. What’s another 30 days? Oh darn, there are some concerns. July 4 etc.”

        And my hunch is saying this will happen. Which depresses me.

        There’s no way this pandemic justifies this sort of action. Plus if Justin and his jack offs in the party are saying this, the opposite is the truth.

      • leon

        Oh yeah. they are gonna keep stringing it along.

      • creech

        Because herd immunity isn’t being built up, we can’t be safely let out of our cages as long as there is one new case developing anywhere in the world.
        Back to the 15th century!

      • JD is Unemployed

        Try living in a country where there is nothing to stop government extending this forever using that exact rationale.

      • R C Dean

        Why, I believe I am living in just such a country.

        Based on nothing more than what is going on all around me, that is.

    • leon

      I heard Clippy was the Brainchild of Bill Gates. And if that hadn’t happened, we would be missing out on an entire line of Memes… He was truly prophetic.

      • UnCivilServant

        An idea so spectacular, you’re still talking about it decades after it’s no longer available!

      • Don Escaped 1PHJ1

        I laughed

        you can still buy .45-70 ammo

      • Gender Traitor

        My favorite spoof: “I see you’re writing a suicide note.”

      • JD is Unemployed

        *chortle*

  38. PieInTheSky

    One of the downsides of being outside after 3 weeks and warm weather is that is makes me want to drink beer. I an halfway through my third though it is only 16:32

    • Naptown Bill

      /still waiting to hear the downside

      • Tejicano

        Depends on how many he has left on ice and how far it is to a store for re-supply.

  39. Tundra

    Good morning, Señor Sharpshooter!

    I would destroy that breakfast. With no regard for carbs.

    And your music choice complements the food nicely. Fueled by both, I could take on the world!

    Make it a great day, peeps!

    • AlexinCT

      That’s the way you do it….

    • Not Adahn

      who sprained his ankle, along with his pack and both of his weapons

  40. The Late P Brooks

    With respct to Suthen and the Minnieglibs, I’m not living in a mosquito-infested swamp.

    Go ahead. Tell us there aren’t any of those ravenous eensy teensy black flies in Saratoga.

    • Not Adahn

      Not that I’ve noticed. Maybe they’re sufficiently teensy and non-biting to matter?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I’m surprised the cops didn’t shoot the homeowner and the DA didn’t charge him.

  41. The Late P Brooks

    Bill has become somewhat disconnected from economic action in the past couple of decades.

    I have seen Bill Gates in several televised interviews over the years, and I can only conclude he is some sort of idiot savant. I find him intellectually unimpressive, let’s say. He may have figured out how to bring computing to “the masses” but I would not trust him to successfully make it back from the grocery store with the right stuff, even with a detailed list. and a map.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I don’t put Gates in the same class as Bezos or Jobs, that’s for certain. He was in the right place at the right time and he employed a few people over the years that had sufficiently ruthless business acumen to make Microsoft the dominant force in PC operating systems.

      • Chipwooder

        His business model was shamelessly ripping off the Macintosh’s operating system.

  42. westernsloper

    Sollum has a piece up (a few days old) about the anti-body testing in San Miguel County. He is the first one to wade into the first results that I have seen.

    Such a wide divergence between the official tallies and the actual number of infections has a dramatic impact on estimates of COVID-19’s lethality. If those numbers are off by a factor of six, as suggested by the low estimate for San Miguel County, the crude case fatality rate (CFR) for the United States, currently 3.4 percent, drops to something like 0.5 percent, which would make COVID-19 about five times as deadly as the seasonal flu. If the official count is off by a factor of more than 20, as suggested by the high estimate, the actual fatality rate would be only slightly higher than 0.1 percent, the estimated CFR for the flu.

  43. Sean

    Tales from NJ: I got a text message from my mom this morning that the walking path near her was posted as shut down. /eyeroll

    Fucking Murphy. I guess that falls under his closing of the parks.

    • Drake

      I encountered one of those this week. Was very tempted to toss it into the woods, but it was near a school with cameras everywhere. Murphy has really gotten his statist fuck on this week.

      • WTF

        And our “heroes in blue” are only too eager to enforce his unconstitutional diktats.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      I think It was Drake who said a bench near his house had been taped off. I eyerolled, and then a few days later I too, witnessed a bench overlooking a body of water near my house with yellow tape around it.

      • Drake

        Wasn’t me – but the other day on the way to the crowded grocery store I passed a little nature trail along some old railroad tracks – all blocked and taped off.

      • Ozymandias

        That was me; it was gone the next day. I suspect someone else decided it wasn’t a good look and tore it down. Or maybe the HOA thought it was too much.
        Some business is doing great making all of these COVID warning signs telling me why I can’t do just about anything.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Ah, yeah I figured it was just local flavors of being over the top but nope, my area is also saving me from sitting on a bench.

  44. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking of The Oppression of the Working Man-

    I started watching this show on Amazon about the building of the Titanic. It is so shot through with pro-union anti-robber-baron bullshit I can’t believe it. Those evul rich business owners are stealing the workers’ right to a job by telling them to either STFU and get back to work or find some other way to while away the hours.

    Two episodes, and it has gotten worse, instead of better. I’m done.

    • Festus

      But the duodemin. Moe! Think of the doudemin!

    • creech

      Wait until you get to the part where we learn all those Belfast wage slaves would have been gamboling in rose covered cottages with their hawt wives and adorable kids if not for the evil robber barons at Harland & Wolff.

  45. The Late P Brooks

    Tales from NJ: I got a text message from my mom this morning that the walking path near her was posted as shut down. /eyeroll

    It’s not about safety, and it’s sure as Hell not about caring for the plebs or making their lives better.
    It’s about power and control, plain and simple.

    • WTF

      It’s become a test run to see just how much they can get away with by declaring an emergency.

      • Drake

        I’ll wait until this is over and the gun stores are restocked – then I’m shopping for a bolt-action precision rifle and a semi-auto shotgun. For hunting of course.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    He was in the right place at the right time and he employed a few people over the years that had sufficiently ruthless business acumen to make Microsoft the dominant force in PC operating systems.

    I don’t really know that much about Ballmer (or the nuts and bolts history of Microsoft), but I can’t help thinking nobody would ever have heard of Gates if he hadn’t gotten hooked up with Ballmer.

    • Gender Traitor

      From what little I’d seen or knew of them, they always reminded me of Pinky & the Brain.

      • Festus

        My aspie instructor from out-reach college courses claimed to know him from Harvard(?) Said he was always a skeevy little bastard that stole ideas.

      • Mojeaux

        that stole ideas

        Paging Mr. Shakespeare. Mr. Shakespeare to the white courtesy phone.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        IIRC, his mother funded his purchase of the DOS code from IBM.

        Like I said, he was fortunate to have some very sharp business people in his company over the years.

  47. The Late P Brooks

    Maybe they’re sufficiently teensy and non-biting to matter?

    They’re teensy, and they most assuredly bite. I’m surprised you haven’t been discovered by them.

  48. Mojeaux

    TFW you thought you massively over-quoted a job and then when you’re finished you realize you massively under-quoted it.

    Ded. d-e-d *flops over*

  49. The Late P Brooks

    I encountered one of those this week. Was very tempted to toss it into the woods, but it was near a school with cameras everywhere. Murphy has really gotten his statist fuck on this week.

    Next time, paint a swastika on it.

    • creech

      Doing that will roll a SWAT in New Jersey.

  50. RAHeinlein

    USPS has requested $89 billion in relief.

    • Tundra

      They’ll get it. Fucking congress is throwing so much money around, that’s chump change.

    • UnCivilServant

      With all the additional business they’re getting from increased online sales?

      • Certified Public Asshat

        They claim the real money maker is junk mail, which has dropped significantly. Most of us are probably happy about that.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Of course they have.

      What’s happening wright now is all the entities that have massively effed-up balance sheets from years of mismanagement are angling to get the Fed to buy their bonds. And it looks like it will happen.

      The Fed is going to own the bond market and they’re starting with things like municipal bonds. This is how Chicago is going to get the pension bailout it so desperately wants.

      They’ll quickly move to ETF funds like Japan’s central bank after these first steps.

      • Nephilium

        I just saw an article in my newsfeed this morning about the Fed owning the bond market.

  51. Rebel Scum

    A bright side to commie-cough?

    “It is in mutual interest that Europe is up to the challenge, otherwise we must absolutely abandon the European dream, and say that everyone should fend for themselves,” said Conte.

    “[Italy] will employ triple, quadruple, quintuple of the resources to get out of this crisis, and there is no guarantee that we will do it in the best, most effective and timely way,” he added.

    Conte argues that since Italians are European citizens, they deserve an appropriate response from Europe, or else Italy will be forced to restart with its own resources, and its national response is likely to jeopardize “the European dream.”

    • Translucent Chum

      Anyone who thought the EU would actually help any country in the bloc when push came to shove for anything is nuts.

    • Tundra

      The EU is a dead man walking. Even before cerveza, things were unraveling.

      EU: Poland, Hungary, Czech Republic Broke EU Law

      The Court of Justice of the European Union (CJEU) has ruled that Poland, Hungary and the Czech Republic broke EU law when they refused to take in migrants under the European Union’s September 2015 relocation agreement. During the 2015 migrant crisis, EU leaders agreed to relocate 160,000 migrants and refugees EU-wide, assigning each EU member state a fixed quota from the camps in Italy and Greece, where migrants and refugees were arriving in record numbers. However, the Czech Republic accepted only 12 of the 2,000 refugees assigned it, while Hungary and Poland took in none.

      In 2017, the EU took Hungary, Poland and the Czech Republic to the Court of Justice of the European Union (CJEU) over that refusal to take migrants. On April 2, 2020, the CJEU ruled against the three countries. The ruling followed the October 2019 recommendation by the Court’s Advocate General, legal advisor to the Court, which said that EU law must be followed and that the EU’s principle of solidarity “necessarily sometimes implies accepting burden-sharing”.

      Yeah, good luck with that.

      • WTF

        “He’s made his ruling, now let him enforce it.”

      • Rebel Scum

        Poland is due for another invasion, I suppose.

      • WTF

        Except now the Poles would crush them.

    • leon

      It’s HAPPENING!!!

      Another War In Europe that we can get embroiled in…. They almost all deserve to be under the russian heel. Except i doubt Russia could do anything more significant than harrass it’s neighbors.

      • Tundra

        The EU, being dumbfucks, are totally dependent on Russia for oil, NG, etc. All Russia has to do is fuck with their energy and the EU will roll over.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        The Russians could be sitting in Berlin in a month if we weren’t involved. Beyond that would be problematic because the French and the Brits have nukes but the other nations are ill prepared.

      • WTF

        Actually the eastern European countries are pretty well-prepared, since they have no desire to go back behind an Iron Curtain.

      • kbolino

        Russia’s no stranger to exclaves, they could skip over Poland and just own Germany.

  52. westernsloper

    I spent this week doing projects all day, welding, grinding, cutting…… and my wrists hurt from holding a grinder too much. Getting old sucks! I am seriously contemplating day drinking today. Medicinal purposes of course.

    • JD is Unemployed

      #metoo, except I’m not tempted by the idea of day drinking because that would mess up my keto success.

      Whatcha makin’?

    • Festus

      Shit! It’s still winter here. Snow forecast for tonight. There was that one year that we actually golfed in March. Ice-off is probably end of May.

  53. Festus

    I always knew that I was going to grow old and die penniless but I didn’t expect it to happen quite yet. Fuck this shit!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      It’s just adorable how they manage to shoehorn their pet causes into every fucking scenario under the sun.

      • Festus

        Alyssa is the scorpion that offers a free ride across the brook to the frog…

      • leon

        That must be a big scorpion…

        But i’d say she’s the snake that asks the little indian boy to carry it down the mountain.

      • commodious spittoon

        It’s a thing of beauty to watch their little minds muddle through the contradictions. She’s committed to endorsing Biden, even if Biden is accused of committing something like the crimes of the sex pest she helped destroy—which, by the progressive standard, means he’s guilty. So she tries to excuse herself by going after guns, just like Weinstein did in that cringey episode. It’s like poetry, it rhymes.

    • leon

      not bringing dangerous firearms into our homes.

      They are like vampires. Once you invite them into your home, they will seduce your wife and kill your kids!

    • Rebel Scum

      Americans bought over 2 million firearms in March of 2020

      Hm. I’m sure we could do better.

      and not bringing dangerous firearms into our homes.

      She said from behind a walled neighborhood/mansion probably patrolled by armed guards.

    • JD is Unemployed

      She’s gone way past going way off the deep end – apparently even her pal Rose McGowan called her out. Charmed 1.0 implodes.

      • Festus

        Rose was hotter back then.

      • JD is Unemployed

        They’re not terrible now, by my standards, which are probably fairly low anyway. Let’s just say it’s not the looks that would send me running in the opposite direction.

    • UnCivilServant

      Shit, I thought they bought quality firearms that didn’t explode.

      • bacon-magic

        Goodness.

    • Q Continuum

      Go fuck yourself mental midget.

      • bacon-magic

        She said in an interview that she owns two guns.

    • B.P.

      With all of this social distancing, folks are going to need something with more range.

  54. Rufus the Monocled

    Just to add to up top. Here’s what’s going on in Canada for those who care.

    There’s two schools of thought fighting. There’s Justin Trudeau taking one track as mentioned and there’s Quebec taking another.

    Where Justin is prepping Canada to shut down (and his government has been wrong at every turn. Back in March, Screech Monkey Freeland was saying stupid things like ‘we go with the science’ in defending not closing the borders. At first, I liked they were not panicking but then I realized they were doing it for ideological reasons and not one based on ‘science’ or for the benefit of Canadians as a whole), Quebec just announced they will begin the process of gradual opening and will ‘accept a certain amount of cases in the population’. This has pitted Ottawa against Quebec. And for the first time in my life I side with Quebec – so much so I would be open to the dissolution of Canada.

    Yup. Trudeau is so bad, I want nothing to do with Canada. Quebec has said all the right things in my view and have been far more pro-active and logical. Legault thinks closer to Trump on matters of the economy and I’m breathing better (no pun intended) now.

    • leon

      Say what you will about the French, but no one has ever said they don’t like to work.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        And they have a sense of pride and dignity.

        Unlike Canada. Bunch of pussies. That they allowed the anthem to be changed for the wrong reasons told me all I needed to know about Canada.

    • Festus

      He’ll do whatever “feels” better and damn the torpedoes. Good God I loathe him.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        It’s been disgusting and troubling to watch every single damn one of these fools breakdown during a presser.

        Freeland cried when a trade deal fell through in 2015 with the Europeans, Trudeau cried during reconciliation, and Hajdu quivered while giving a press conference about Covid.

        Get lost with this shit.

  55. The Late P Brooks

    And our “heroes in blue” are only too eager to enforce his unconstitutional diktats.

    Yeah. If there was ever any doubt about whether the cops (as opposed to the military) would hesitate for a moment to enforce flagrantly illegal/unconstitutional orders, we have our answer.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Any doubt vis a vis the police on unconstitutional orders was mostly wishful thinking.

    • Fatty Bolger

      As it should be! The state over all! Oathkeepers is a hate group.

  56. Hyperion

    OFFS!

    OFFS! Will this asshat ever go away? Can someone please tell him he’s not a leader of anything anymore? Just go away, fuckstick!

    • leon

      See. This is why we should elect old people. They Die afterword. We’ll be dealing with Obama until at least 2040…

    • Rebel Scum

      So he is admitting failure because he should have shut down the economy during h1n1 and mers?

    • JD is Unemployed

      Obama is charming, intelligent, erudite, noble, brave, handsome, has a Nobel Peace prize, and was elected POTUS TWICE without Russian help! What have you got going for yourself, you stinky deplorable?! Go back to your religion and coal and pickup trucks and AR16s – hopefully they will kill you before the planet!

      *progressive mic drop*

    • Hyperion

      The jackass has never seen a pile of dead bodies too tall to climb upon and start crowing.

      • Naptown Bill

        Because everyone is ‘tarded about something, my wife worships the ground that shitbird huckster walks on. I seriously forced her to watch Eye in the Sky specifically so I could say, “…and that’s what your boy does on a routine basis. Nobel Peace Prize winner who wouldn’t say he wouldn’t murder an American citizen without due process. No problem whatsoever killing innocent people with missiles just in case one of them might be a terrorist.” No impact whatsoever other than starting to think more positively about drone strikes *so long as Barry was doing them*.

    • Rhywun

      Duckspeak:

      The intention was to make speech, and especially speech on any subject not ideologically neutral, as nearly as possible independent of consciousness. For the purposes of everyday life it was no doubt necessary, or sometimes necessary, to reflect before speaking, but a Party member called upon to make a political or ethical judgement should be able to spray forth the correct opinions as automatically as a machine gun spraying forth bullets.

    • Rebel Scum

      “It’s beautiful”, TheBern! said with a tear in his eye.

    • Hyperion

      We have to stop them. They’re not in their homes like they were told to be. And people just can’t be taking food from charities, you don’t know what the sodium content might be! Send in the troops and round em up! To the camps!

    • leon

      Once again demonstrating the subtle malignity of charity. Because we let charities exist, people can turn to them for help, and it makes it so that conservatives can argue against Government Aid. We need to ban Food Pantries so that we can take over the Gorcery Industry, to provide equitable access to Food for all /Salon

      • Hyperion

        “We need to ban Food Pantries so that we can take over the Gorcery Industry, to provide equitable access to Food for all”

        Of course, they’ve already thought of this.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Misinterpreting data to make a clickbaity headline 101?

    • Pope Jimbo

      Doesn’t that undermine the narrative? If actual infections are so widespread, shouldn’t there be a pile of dead bodies somewhere?

      Minnesoda is running at about 3% deaths to cases right now. My wife has used that as a reason to worry about this. I have pointed out that a) the only people being tested are the really sick bastards who are showing up at a hospital. If we were testing everyone, we’d probably find out that a ton more people had it but weren’t so sick that they even thought about getting tested. Also that since the predictions were that old geezers were going to die at a rate of 5%+, and the median age of dead corona victims was 87, it is safe to say that even that is off some.

      My gut tells me that no one in the govt wants to test everyone or even do the antibody tests because they know the data won’t support the wild claims they made. There will be some stories about studies being under way, but that will be the end of it.

      • Tundra

        11 deaths yesterday. 3 over 70, 3 over 80 and 5 over 90.

        Walz is a dumb cunt.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Yeah when you jump from 39 to 50 deaths AND your median age goes from 86 to 87, it isn’t like spring chickens with bright futures are getting knocked off.

    • Rebel Scum

      That’s quite a bit more than a Mass-a-two-shits.

    • Count Potato

      I poster a twitter thread of them last night.

    • Naptown Bill

      In these trying times Count keeps a little bit of normalcy in our lives.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Yes I suppose she is. Finally, there you have it, the answer to your daily question.

      • Hyperion

        Are you saying he should get some new material?

  57. The Late P Brooks

    Is Paul Volcker still alive? If he is, we need to get him hooked up with Ginsberg’s life support crew, ASAP.
    We’re going to need him, once the inevitable stagflationary cycle gets cooking after we “rescue” the economy.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I don’t see how once the Fed owns things like Chicago municipal bonds, it’s going to rid itself of them. Nobody is going to want to buy that shit ever.

    • Chipwooder

      As hale and hearty as Lou Reed, he is

  58. Rufus the Monocled

    In the Lord of the Rings, who was the King who lost his mind during a battle sending one of his sons out to face sure death?

    • UnCivilServant

      It was the Steward, acting as Regent.

      I forget the Steward’s name.

      • leon

        Denithor.

      • Nephilium

        Denethor.

      • Translucent Chum

        Denethor.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Mario Cuomo?

    • Nephilium

      John Noble.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      Lol.

      Nerds.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Wasnt a King. It was Denethor the last steward of Gondor….at least if I am thinking of what you are referencing

    • Pope Jimbo

      Don?

    • Gustave Lytton

      Wait til they hear about mass graves. I wonder if Comrade Stalin knows?

    • Fatty Bolger

      “It’s beautiful”, TheBern! said with a tear in his eye.

      h/t Rebel Scum

  59. Naptown Bill

    Today was my breaking point on the quarantine, and I have a Zoom meeting to thank. It was stupid. There was no point to the meeting–there rarely are at my job–the process sucked, and it was a pain in the ass doing it in a very small house with a baby, a young kid, and two dogs. I look around and I wonder why at this late stage there’s still no toilet paper in stores. Tempers are short after a month of newborn in-home virtual quarantine with maybe a month of “normal” before this severe overreaction. I do believe some good will come out of this, but the mishandling of this infuriates me almost as much as the hyperventilation and pearl-clutching of people in the media and regular dopes in the street. If fucking Bernie Sanders stayed in the race and ran on his exact platform except for specifying that he would lift the quarantine and prevent state and local authorities from closing businesses I’d vote for the sonofabitch three times.

    • Chipwooder

      TP has suddenly reappeared in stores here. After weeks of shelves being either completely barren or stocked with one or two rolls of the shitty single-ply Scotts, Publix was loaded with all the brands today.

      Still no paper towels though.

      • Naptown Bill

        I heard somewhere that the reason for the continued shortage is that all the offices and stuff around here are closed, so everyone who used to drop a deuce at work using the commercial TP is now having to buy up the consumer stuff. Not sure if that’s true, but it’s a good working theory. Also, people are stupid.

      • Chipwooder

        It does make some sense. Doesn’t explain the dearth of paper towels, though.

    • Drake

      Part of the TP problem is that people aren’t going to work. I read somewhere that roughly 40% of craps are normally taken at work or public bathrooms – so they aren’t using as much home tp.

      There must be vast overstocks of industrial toilet paper somewhere. I had a good laugh yesterday as I was picking up food at a deli. They were selling industrial TP rolls for $1.50.

      • Michael

        Now you just need one of those giant dispensers that only lets you tear off one square at a time.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Can’t spare a square…

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        A local restaurant is selling TP that they get through their supplier.

      • Lady Z

        My company is doing that too. It was just sitting in the warehouse with all our dining rooms closed.

    • R C Dean

      By my estimate, 90% of Zoom meetings could be teleconferences.

      • Gustave Lytton

        And a certain number of those teleconferences could just be a circulated memo. Of course, there would need to be a follow up call to discuss the memo.

      • robc

        I had a zoom meeting a while back (just before the lockdown) in which the organizer apologized at the end. “sorry, should have been an email.”

      • Translucent Chum

        We had one with a vendor. He was hosting and had us all muted. He would stop every once in a while and ask if there were questions. There were several, but he had everyone muted. So he just kept on going. For an hour. By time he was done our SVP and several other big wigs had just dropped off.

        I kept sending him messages in the chat that he had us muted. He finally responded, and apologized. Asked again if there were any questions. I told him about 20 minutes ago and left the meeting.

      • Chipwooder

        Yep. Teleconferences are mostly useless in my experience because the conversation constantly starts and stops. People inevitably start trying to speak at the same time, then they stop their statement and mutter “Sorry, were you saying something?” And this happens about fifty times an hour.

      • Tundra

        Lol.

        I had one the other day with a new rep group. 22 people total. Possibly 2 of them were actually paying attention (as they asked questions).

        I finished it in 28 minutes, though. And told them that I don’t visit just to visit and I never use PowerPoint. I got a lot of feedback after that!

        But yeah, Zoom is largely silly.

      • Naptown Bill

        We’ve actually had meetings about how we have too many unnecessary meetings, and the meetings we do have are run badly. I think in the five going on six years I’ve been in this job I’ve attended four (and I’m not exaggerating) meetings that were necessary.

      • Shirley Knott

        John Cleese did 2 corporate trading videos on meetings. I’ve seen one, it was pretty good, but not top shelf Cleese.
        Meetings, Bloody Meetings, parts 1 & 2 IIRC.

    • B.P.

      And the outdoor restrictions keep getting more onerous. There’s a little baseball diamond near my house on perhaps a 3-acre lot that no one ever uses. My boy and I have been going there every night to do some hitting and fielding practice, and no one is ever around. As of last night there are signs all over the backstop that say it is closed. I’m pretty sure I can still live in a tent downtown and crap on the sidewalk, though.

      • Count Potato

        It makes no sense.

      • WTF

        It does if you assume they are testing to see how far they can push exercising dictatorial powers if they declare an emergency.

    • Rebel Scum

      I’m guessing there is more to the linking as well.

  60. Tundra

    I miss hockey.

    I was reading an interview with the Great One this morning, and he was talking about Ovi potentially breaking his records (all for it, btw).

    This goal was discussed in the comments:

    Ovechkin to Ovechkin

    How do you not root for Ovi?

    • Naptown Bill

      I am the very definition of an ultra-casual hockey fan and even I’m a big Ovi fan. I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say he’s up there in the local sports pantheon with Cal Ripken, Jr. and Joe Gibbs. Plus, he seems like a really likable guy, although that seems to be more true of hockey players than many other sports for some reason.

    • Chipwooder

      Because I despise the Caps?

      It’s nothing personal, though. He’s an incredible talent. How he can play the game he plays and never, ever get injured is amazing.

      • Naptown Bill

        Supposedly early in his career someone asked him something like that and in broken English he replied, “Russian machine never break.” That’s the name of a local fan site now.

      • Chipwooder

        Yeah, I remember that quote.

        I wish he were still allowed to wear that mirrored shield. That was awesome. Made him look like RoboCop or something.

    • topnotchtoledo

      Russian machine never break

    • Swiss Servator

      Because he is cheap shot, POS?

      • Tundra

        Nope. You’re thinking of Crosby.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I can haz Natassja Kinski?

    • creech

      At least they aren’t invading Belgium….yet.

    • Rebel Scum

      Probably the wurst virus of all time.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Don’t be a brat.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        But it makes for some danke memes.

  61. Sean

    https://chicago.suntimes.com/2020/4/10/21213581/jalisco-new-generation-cartel-luis-alderete-el-mencho-grenade-launchers-el-chapo-sinaloa

    A top lieutenant to the brutal Jalisco New Generation drug cartel boss known as “El Mencho” who’s facing federal drug charges in Chicago tried to buy grenade launchers and assault rifles because “it’s wartime over here” in Mexico, according to federal authorities.

    They say Luis Alderete is part of the Mexican drug cartel that the Trump administration singled out as a threat to the United States in 2018. The cartel is a major drug supplier to the Chicago area, officials say.

    I love the screenshot of the text message.

    • Naptown Bill

      “Oh hey, you got a granade launcher I can get off you real quick?”

      • Chipwooder

        A Ford Granada launcher? That would be awesome!

      • Tundra

        That’s absolutely wonderful!

    • R C Dean

      H , the guy’s avatar is perfect.

    • leon

      “I have my little Mexican that i will see tonight”

      Geeze. Its like the guy doesn’t know how racist that is.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Don’t see nuthin’ little about that Meskin

  62. leon

    So… I think an issue with the cv thing is that we are, as an entire country, being hit by constant news updates of what is Happening in NYC, because that is where it is hardest hit, but also because that is where a lot of the Media establishment is. And so when NYC gets hit hard, the rest of the nation is going to have to suffer for it.

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      Yep, NYC is over half of the US stats, across the board. Almost everywhere else you look, this isn’t some overwhelming thing.

      • Gustave Lytton

        But that’s what it could be like in your neighborhood! Fear!

    • Chipwooder

      Yep. I’ve been banging that drum on here for a while. The press covers this thing as if NYC’s situation were the norm rather than a particularly extreme exception.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Exactly the same thing happens every winter. Some storm hits NYC and we get stories here in Minnesoda about it despite the fact we’ve already had 2 or 3 snownamis that were as bad or worse.

      I always attributed it to laziness. Easy to cover a story that is local to you, than it is to haul your ass off to Deplorable Land.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Yes, it also explains why the NFL will waste a prime time SNF and MNF game once a year resulting in the rest of the country knowing just how awful the Giants are.

      • Chipwooder

        🙁
        🙁
        🙁

    • Nephilium

      Yep. 213 deaths here in Ohio. But the age range of confirmed cases goes from less then 1 to 101. DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

    • Creosote Achilles

      We are wrecking the economy and what’s left of civil liberties in order to protect Boomers with stuff that will kill them in the next year or two anyway, particularly ones that are dumb enough to pack themselves into a hell-hole like NYC. This is insanity.

    • Naptown Bill

      I was a little skeptical of that to begin with but I really do think it’s absolutely true. NYC is seeing a lot of infections and, comparatively, a lot of deaths, and the networks are based out of NYC. Where else do you see outbreaks? DC. Where the politicians live. If Tulsa and Denver had the most cases this would be a below-the-fold story and we’d all be going about our regular, TP-filled lives.

    • Translucent Chum

      Alex Roy, whose 2006 record was beaten by Bolian and now works as a special operations director for Ford’s Argo AI autonomous car subsidiary, tweeted that “Patriotism = staying off our roads until this is over.

      Oh, fuck off.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        What a rebel…

      • Timeloose

        Lighten up Francis.

    • The Hyperbole

      Last time I read about this they explained how they had a team of twenty people and five or six cars running interference and scouting routes etc… That’s bullshit!, teams should be one car and three people tops, preferably in some sort of costume, and the only advance information/smokey alerts should be that which they can get over a CB radio. None of these recent “records” are legitimate.

      • Timeloose

        Dumm,Dunn, Dumm…Captain Chaos!!!

      • B.P.

        The damned shame of it all is that you can’t get Cannonball Run on any of the streaming services, so far as I can tell. I’ve wanted to show the movie to my boy for a couple of years, but no go. Cannonball Run II is available, though.

  63. Festus

    Tapping out, Friends. See you (maybe) on the dark side.

  64. Translucent Chum

    Two headlines in Detroit.

    Inside Sinai-Grace ‘war zone’: ‘We started to run out of body bags’

    UM delays field hospital opening due to ‘significantly flattening’ curve of COVID-19 cases

    • RAHeinlein

      Shorter UM – we don’t want anything to do with the shit in Detroit.

  65. The Late P Brooks

    Doesn’t that undermine the narrative? If actual infections are so widespread, shouldn’t there be a pile of dead bodies somewhere?

    Speaking of which- I have been seeing reports about some bizarre thing DeBlasio was saying about uncounted/unreported plague deaths. Is he saying there are hundreds of uncollected bodies in apartments all over the city?

    • Yusef the Bored

      That’s just the normal smell……

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Yusef! How-DEE!

    • Not Adahn

      He literally said that the majority of people who died at home died of the ‘rona. I can’t remember if he modified “majority” with “vast” or “overwhelming,” but he did add an intensifier.

  66. PieInTheSky

    The Party for Socialism and Liberation (PSL) doesn’t stand for REAL socialism.
    They are a bourgeois-revisionist front group, set up to confuse The Masses, and to distract them from The Class Struggle.
    That’s why I’ve joined the Socialist Liberation Party (SLP).

    https://mobile.twitter.com/k_niemietz?lang=en

    • Toxteth O’Grady

      Splitter!

  67. B.P.

    In case you haven’t been paying attention, this week’s talking point:

    https://www.pewtrusts.org/en/research-and-analysis/blogs/stateline/2020/04/10/with-no-us-plan-to-return-to-normal-some-states-are-creating-their-own

    “The federal government has yet to produce even the framework of a plan — let alone the supplies and workforce to carry it out — leaving states and local governments to cobble together their own tenuous roadmaps.”

    Where’s the plan?! Rule over us Hitler-dictator!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The role of the feds is to facilitate state responses because one size fits all solutions suck.

    • Naptown Bill

      There are a scary number of people openly begging for virtual martial law.

      • AlmightyJB

        They all can eat shit and die.

      • Naptown Bill

        I will happily provide both options. My patience has worn through.

    • Yusef the Bored

      isn’t that why we have Sovereign States?

      • AlmightyJB

        If Trump would have started out with a National lockdown response, they would have been calling him Hitler and screaming about state sovereignty. Doesn’t matter what he does, it’s the opposite of what he should do. I guess there is a certain freedom in that.

      • B.P.

        This. If a comprehensive federal plan is ever put into place, many state governors will immediately say the federal plan is crap and forge ahead with their own plans, even if the federal plan corresponds with theirs.

      • Q Continuum

        Newsom more or less declared Kali to be an independent nation yesterday. Fine by me. Kalexit is overdue.

      • B.P.

        Do all surrounding states have to build their own individual walls, or will there be a united effort to build one somewhere between them and us?

    • Not Adahn

      Lol, all week NPR has reported that Trump was going to set up a recovery taskforce immediately following that with “it’s too soon! We haven’t cured the virus yet!”

    • kbolino

      On a related note, explaining to people that we have 51 state/district elections and not 1 national election* for President is surprisingly difficult at times.

      * = The Electoral College being appointed by those states to conduct a national election later, rather than “the people” all voting in a single contest in early November

    • Q Continuum

      “The federal government’s failure to produce one could leave millions of workers, students and families stuck inside even after hospitals and first responders have weathered the initial crisis.”

      Do these people even realize what clowns they sound like? Literally within the past 24 hours, there have been breathless, panic-stricken reports about EVUL BADORANGEMAN THINKS OPENING THE KUNTREE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ALL THE ZILLIONS OF PEEPLE DYING! and now it’s EVUL BADORANGEMAN WON’T TELL US HOW TO REOPEN THE KUNTREE!

      The correct course of action is ignore, ignore, ignore.

  68. Naptown Bill

    In other news, this is two nights in a row there have been shootings in the local projects. Two guys the first night, one of whom I think shot himself in the foot trying to pull his gun, one last night in what I’d bet was a payback shooting. Bars and restaurants might be closed but slingin’ is essential work, apparently.

    • kbolino

      But the chiefs of police asked everybody to stop committing crimes! How is this possible?

    • Q Continuum

      Shooting people is illegal! How can they do this?!?!

  69. AlmightyJB

    I’m really going to miss my mid-morning smoked sausage, egg, cheese bagel or muffin when I’m back in the office.

    • PieInTheSky

      Back to spam eggs bacon spam sausage and spam?

      • AlmightyJB

        Nah, back to just coffee.

    • Timeloose

      I’ve been eating homemade tamales and eggs all week. Beats the hell out of Egg McMuffin.

      • Not Adahn

        …jealous

      • Timeloose

        They turned out to be much easier than I remembered to make. I used ground up grits instead of masa. Lots of shortening and corn husks fro 5 years ago.

      • Nephilium

        I’ve never spent the time to make tamales, but I did find a recipe for tamale “muffins”. Basically a layer of masa dough in the bottom of a muffin pan, topped with meat, cheese, and veggies. Then baked.

    • Nephilium

      There will be no office anymore. Everyone will be WFH.

      • Q Continuum

        Wrong again; we’ll all be dead.

  70. Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

    I’m beginning to think that the only way we’re really going to get these economic restrictions lifted is if Boomers, as a group, say that “we’ll take one for the team.” 94% of the deaths from COVID in the province of Alberta, to date, have been people 50 years of age or over. 91% have been people 60 years of age or over. 75% of the deaths have been people 70 years of age or older.

    Why can’t we just suggest to everyone (say) above the official age of retirement (65 years) that they stay self-isolated whilst the rest of the pop’n (pretty much everyone of working age anyways) goes back to work with appropriate social distancing rules? Apparently that’s too hard, and it’s more worthwhile to inflict huge amounts of pain on the younger generations.

    I’m a Boomer. I’d be perfectly willing to self-isolate under these rules. Boomers en masse are showing themselves to be selfish cuntes who think they have the right to live forever and damn the consequences to everyone else.

    • B.P.

      I’ve been a little surprised at the lack of trend articles from young, hipster websites spouting the inter-generational warfare that was all the rage six months ago, but from a coronavirus angle.

      • Q Continuum

        The people spouting that shit have trust funds so they can trash Mommy and Daddy economically all they want. Now that they’ve been terrified into thinking that Mommy and Daddy will die, they don’t care anymore.