Wednesday Afternoon Links

by | Jun 3, 2020 | Daily Links | 415 comments

Today has not been a good day for me, professionally. Full blown dress panic about some very critical data that is not stored as it should be. The sort of thing that gets you deposed in lawsuits you definitely do not want to be a part of. And also gets your client and possibly your employer’s name in headlines.

Uncle Joe inches closer to being the official Dem nominee.

The police union turns on DeBlasio. I mean, they already hated him, but they’re gonna give him a good kicking now.

Rep. Kevin Brady used to be my rep, and wrote me a letter of recommendation for college, but I don’t think creating perverse incentives to fight perverse incentives is really the way to go.

Good on Boris Johnson for recognizing the import of the 99 Year Lease to Britain.

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

415 Comments

  1. Count Potato

    Sorry, it hasn’t been a good day for me at all.

  2. Count Potato

    “Uncle Joe inches closer to being the official Dem nominee.”

    But will he remember?

    • Trials and Trippelations

      How could he forget he is running for Senate of Delaware?

    • Enough About Palin

      C’mon, man.

    • C. Anacreon

      His campaign slogan will be “Husker Du”.

    • Agent Cooper

      Joe Biden: Inchin’ to Clinchin’!

  3. leon

    As a guilty pleasure i will sometimes watch “Krystall and Saggar” from the Hill. It always makes me laugh when she says “Look, Joe biden still hasn’t gotten the votes he needs, so the Dems don’t need to act like they Have to keep him”. He’s the Nominee silly.

    • SDF-7

      (insert Jaws theme….)

      …. Loading….

      • blackjack

        We’re gonna need a bigger despot retard!

    • Certified Public Asshat

      They are on Joe Rogan today and from what I have heard so far they don’t seem that bad. At the very least, they have convinced themselves that they are a fair and balanced show.

      • leon

        Fair and balanced they are not. They are just forthright about their opinions and call things as the see them, which, when compared with CNN, makes them look very fair.

  4. SDF-7

    Ouch… sorry to hear about the data issue, Brett. Hope it works out without depositions.

    I think we should also extend uncapped immigration with a fast path to citizenship for any Hong Kong resident who wishes to immigrate. An infusion of patriots wouldn’t hurt this country. That said — the UK (and us if we did it) had better vet the daylights out of folks coming in on such a program. Seems an easy way for the ChiComs to sneak in operatives, after all.

    Otherwise — good afternoon, all you happy people. Stay safe if you’re near the lunacy… enjoy the hills with Julie Andrews if you’re well away from them… you know who you are.

    • Pope Jimbo

      In the mid ’90s I worked with a bunch of “Russian Jews” who had been allowed to leave the USSR as part of glasnost. It was funny because a lot of them knew as little about (((them))) as I did (and I know nothing, prairie jews being rare as shit).

      The more worthless piece of shit, the more apparent it was that they were (((fake))).

      So yeah, I’d say you better vet the crap out of them.

      • Chipwooder

        The Marielsky Airlift?

      • grrizzly

        In the Soviet Union being Jewish had nothing to do with religion. It was the issue of ethnicity. There was no expectation that Russian Jews would follow any Jewish traditions. They were considered Jews anyway.

      • pan fried wylie

        ahhh, <<>>

      • pan fried wylie

        <<<jews>>> even

    • Ted S.

      If he worked for FedGov, he’d get a paid holiday and promotion for his handling of the data.

    • Tonio

      Hoping you are able to fix the data security problem quickly.

    • Florida Man

      With all the domestic communist do the chicoms need to sneak any in?

      • R C Dean

        Wish I could figure out how to type “Where the white women at” with a stereotypical Chinese accent.

    • DEG

      Ouch… sorry to hear about the data issue, Brett. Hope it works out without depositions.

      Seconded.

    • blackjack

      I remember meeting some when they were first colonizing Hollywood at Top Fuel coffee house ( when Hollywood was rough and tumble) These two ruskie chicks were shooting pool and they were terrible at it. I asked them if they played pool back in Russia. They told me that shooting pool was only for rich people back there. I asked them why there were rich people, aren’t they all equal? They said you know, the government.

  5. Count Potato

    “We have pepperball guns, tear gas, and other anti criminal riot apparatus such as horses not being deployed!”

    This one one of the few times I’m for more policing.

    • Winston

      Ah the glories of modern police: they will shut down gatherings unless it is woke rioting then they say Fuck You Racist.

    • Suthenboy

      I am not sure that I am. The cops dont seem much better than the rioters.

      • Count Potato

        Robbery and arson should be illegal.

    • Florida Man

      The Orlando police have done a very good job. Allowed ample opportunity for peaceful protest while providing guidance and escort through a prepared path and come out in force After curfew to prevent looting. I don’t know any way to do it better.

  6. Winston

    How long until this site is declared a public health menace?

    • SDF-7

      Well, I don’t think Heroic Mulatto’s diet is acceptable to most health inspectors….

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        You mean ass? Yeah, not enough fiber, unless it involves a thong.

      • blackjack

        At least he didn’t eat his grandma.

  7. The Other Kevin

    Hope things turn around for you, Brett. We still have two teenagers living at home and in the past week we’ve had major issues with both of them. Sounds like a few of us Glibs are having a bad day. I will raise a glass to you all later tonight.

    • Ted S.

      My sister turned 50 today. Way to make me feel old.

      • slumbrew

        I got an AARP “membership packet” in the mail a couple days ago. That was uncalled for.

      • Tulip

        No kidding. Jerks. I’m not old!

      • Enough About Palin

        My brother turned 70 last month. I remember when he was in grade school. Fuck!

      • blackjack

        I turned 54 last January. I remember when I was in grade school. Fuck!

      • Mojeaux

        The calendar says I’m 52, but that’s totally incorrect. I’m actually 23.

      • Enough About Palin

        Is that calendar up in your attic?

      • Incentives Matter

        Right next to a picture of you that looks like you’re hundreds of years old? (And are there cold fusion weapons involved?)

      • pan fried wylie

        Born 2148
        Timewarped to 1867
        In Stasis 1891 – 1975

        So, something like -42yrs old.

      • Mojeaux

        Cold fusion and a baby ‘gator!

      • UnCivilServant

        Even knowing the reference, I can’t help but envision a wrist-mounted Gator Launcher.

  8. Count Potato

    “In the discussions about some kind of new coronavirus stimulus package, Republicans have reportedly been fixated on the elevated unemployment benefits that people are temporarily getting right now. Some Republicans have been insisting that the hiked unemployment benefits is a disincentive for a recipient to go back to work or seek a new job.

    Brady’s is an interesting idea, sure, but there’s also a glaring hole — or, rather, a group of people who’d be left out of this. What about essential workers? Bus drivers, warehouse workers, and the like, who’ve continued to show up for work during the pandemic, potentially risking their health? They would be shut out from this benefit as it stands now, because they can’t “return” to something they’ve been going to all this time, which is arguably unfair and definitely needs to be addressed if a proposal like this is to move forward.”

    It will never be fair, no matter what is done.

    • CPRM

      I’ve been laid off and returned to work twice (could happen a 3rd time yet), does that mean $1200 for each time?

    • R C Dean

      Some Republicans have been insisting that the hiked unemployment benefits is a disincentive for a recipient to go back to work or seek a new job.

      We are absolutely seeing that.

      • leon

        I love when the press writes things about claims. If it’s something they like it’s, “Experts say…”, but if its not its “Republicans insist…”, even if both positions have experts to back up the claims (as in this case, many economists have come out and said, paying people more than what they made will dis-incentivize them to work)

      • mexican sharpshooter

        That just means we need to raise the minimum wage so people will be incentivized to work for living wages. //Prog

      • Homple

        I wish this was our biggest problem. Leave it to the GOP to go for the capillary.

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      Some Republicans have been insisting that the hiked unemployment benefits is a disincentive for a recipient to go back to work or seek a new job.

      It’s a thing. My wife is doing everything she can to meet the requirements of unemployment without accidentally getting herself a job. Malicious compliance.

      • Brett L

        At this point, I wonder if 8 weeks really matter. The bennies expire at the end of July. Just let them run out and enjoy the boom in late July through Labor Day.

      • Ted S.

        No, because when those bennies run out, the media will feed us a bunch of sob stories about people “losing” their benefits.

      • pan fried wylie

        *Bookmarked*

    • Enough About Palin

      “Some Republicans have been insisting that the hiked unemployment benefits is a disincentive for a recipient to go back to work or seek a new job.”

      Well of course. Nobody wants employer paid health insurance.

    • Fourscore

      I’m old enough to remember having to pay an employment agency to find a person a job. I never did but I took some shit jobs, worked for Manpower and got hired 2X by the company(s) they sent me to. Never heard of paying someone for not producing, other than unemployment.

      • Ted S.

        Yeah, I got my temp-to-permanent job via Manpower, who were much more efficient than the state Department of Labor.

    • db

      I have a friend who is a Deputy Sheriff in an adjacent county where they laid off half of the department at the beginning of the lockdown. He wanted to keep working, so he took a job doing 911 dispatch. Most of the other deputies took unemployment and are making more than he is, sitting on their asses.

  9. Chipwooder

    RC, in the last thread you were asking about the Benelli M4? I don’t own one but I did carry one for a while as a gate guard in the Marines. It’s a great weapon, accurate and reliable. We took them out to the range several times and never saw one misfeed or jam.

    • Count Potato

      $1800 though.

      • bacon-magic

        ^
        That’s why I like my pump shotties.

      • Suthenboy

        Hard to beat a pump. Reasonable price and very reliable.
        For any close range combat, which most combat is, it is extremely effective.

      • bacon-magic

        And racking the slide has a very pleasing, some would say fear instilling, sound.

      • R C Dean

        I hear ya. My Remington 1100s have had thousands of rounds put through them, and the only problem was when I didn’t reassemble one correctly. For a high-pressure situation, I trust the semi-auto mechanism more than I trust my fallible left hand. It doesn’t help that I don’t have thousands of reps pumping a shotgun either.

        Semi-auto 4 lyfe!

        Suthen, I was interested in your take on your Saiga. I’ve always wondered about the handling with that big heavy magazine, and how secure it is.

      • Fourscore

        I’m with you, RC, thousands of clay birds died at the end of a 26″ and a 30″ barreled 1100. Lots of ducks, doves and a few quail ended up in the fry pan as well. Haven’t had one out other than to wipe it down for years though.

      • R C Dean

        Haven’t had one out other than to wipe it down for years though.

        Me neither. I am deaf in one ear, and the hearing in the other one is very fragile, with tinnitus gradually eating up my remaining hearing. I have done very little shooting since moving to Tucson 7 years ago. Even with plugs and muffs, I get additional tinnitus shooting. And when my tinnitus cranks up, it can be a permanent increase in tinnitus and loss of hearing.

        I’m pretty sure if I ever have to shoot a gun without hearing protection, especially indoors, I will be either completely deaf or close to it.

      • Fourscore

        Some 50 years ago I did an Army staff study for using a pump with buck shot (a Winc 97 at the time) for the point man on an Inf squad. This was in the time of South Sea vacations, I saw MPs and VN guards carrying them.

      • Chipwooder

        And that’s why I don’t own one.

      • DEG

        I picked up one at an auction for about $1350 or so including auction fees.

        I am embarrassed to admit I haven’t done anything with it yet.

      • Sean

        I’ve got guns around I’ve never shot. Some others, I have to run out and put rounds down range ASAP.

      • blackjack

        I paid 1k for my SAA .45lc and haven’t fired it yet. I just don’t want to hassle with buying ammo since the new law went into effect.

    • Drake

      Mossberg semi-autos are much cheaper but I’ll probably split the difference and go for a Beretta 1301.

      • EvilSheldon

        The Beretta 1301 Tactical is the best fighting shotgun you can buy today. Low recoil, reliable, eats everything. Highly, highly recommended.

  10. Chipwooder

    Lulz

    Joe Gabriel Simonson
    @SaysSimonson
    ·
    19m
    NEW: Two months after the beating of Rodney King, Joe Biden proposed a “Police Officer’s Bill of Rights” in the Senate.

    • SDF-7

      “He evolved”

    • commodious spittoon

      How long before white lefties begin insisting on behalf of blacks that the latter never really had any problem with cops, in fact they’re ready to lock arms and march in lockstep to oppose the real threat, white nationalism?

  11. Pope Jimbo

    Over/Under on when this is discovered to be a hoax . Smart money might be on the under because people are already calling BS.

    In an interview with The Daily Beast, Ashley said her son found the first letter inside the door at 8:30 a.m. on Monday. Weller and her wife, Cat, did a sweep of their property, looking outside her house for any signs of vandalism or possible arson, Ashley said. She later spotted a second note on her car—which wasn’t there earlier in the morning—while she cleaned up her yard.

    The couple, who have four adopted children of color, described the threats in a series of Facebook posts. “Our first death threat. Our kids can’t remove their blackness, so we can’t remove our signs,” Ashley Weller wrote Monday. She said they reported the notes to police and added, “We would love your fire extinguishers if you don’t need them right now.”

    The second note, on the vehicle behind the Wellers’ home, declared, “Yeah we were here too. Take your SJW Bullshit signs down or we burn you in your sleep! You mother fuckers want a war you will get one.”

    (Several commenters on a Facebook post pointed out the alleged similarities in handwriting between the threats and photos of handwritten signs and notes posted online by Cat Weller. Ashley said that allegation was a “blatantly false accusation” that is “absolutely disheartening and ridiculous.”)

    ~ef~

    • Chipwooder

      The link is definitely a hoax

    • SDF-7

      Recursion error. Link stack overflow.

      • Ted S.

        I’ll take “Things That Never Happened” for $1,000, Alex.

    • Playa Manhattan

      “described the threats in a series of Facebook posts”

      There’s your answer.

    • Chipwooder

      Read: lesbian couple is getting annoyed that they aren’t getting enough victim cred.

      • slumbrew

        Over/under on them driving the whole family off a cliff in a SUV in a couple of months?

      • Chipwooder

        Oh man, I totally forgot about that awful story. Yes, there are some notable similarities.

    • EvilSheldon

      “You want a war,” is AFA sloganeering. I’ve seen it tagged a couple places in DC just today.

  12. CPRM

    Boris’ plan to scare China is letting people from Hong Kong move to a place on a road to being just as authoritarian as China?

    • Winston

      Free trade and immigration will turn China and UK into libertopias…oh wait.

      • prolefeed

        To be fair, Airstrip One will likely continue to be several decades behind mainland China in authoritarianism, as each descends into more tyranny.

      • Incentives Matter

        Three million Hong Kongers emigrating to the UK might be just the bracing tonic that Airstrip One needs.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        That was my second thought when I first heard it.

        The UK could use some people who value actual liberty.

    • SDF-7

      I’m glad I have zero idea who either of those people are. And no, I don’t need to be illuminated.

      • Incentives Matter

        I’m glad I have zero idea who either of those people are.

        Yeah, I got nuthin’, either.

    • PBRstreetgang

      Just cant’ help making it all about her.

    • The Other Kevin

      In the AM Links I was lamenting that everyone seems to be going back to their default, but in this case it’s kind of funny.

    • Chipwooder

      1)Never heard of either one of these two before
      2)Judging by the pictures of the boyfriend, I’m not surprised that she’s bi – he looks to be about two steps from declaring his own stunning and brave announcement.

      • Rhywun

        He looks about 12. Eew.

      • Suthenboy

        Two?

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Yeah, he looks to be just a shade straighter than Johnny Weir.

    • Fatty Bolger

      My wife and I watch Riverdale. It’s just dumb fun, but it knows it, and I tend to like shows like that.

      However, if SJW stuff makes you angry instead of makes you laugh, then don’t even think about watching it. One of my favorite moments was Josie (of The Pussycats fame), lecturing Archie on how all the doors open to him in the music industry were closed to her because she’s black – when her Dad is a famous musician, and her Mom is the wealthy Mayor of Riverdale. Poor baby!

      • Count Potato

        Wait, Josie is black? What happened to Valerie?

      • Fatty Bolger

        Also black. All of the Pussycats are Black. She’s nice, and not a whiny backstabbing bitch like Josie.

      • Grummun

        There is only one Josie of the Pussycats and it is young hot Rachael Leigh Cook.

      • DEG

        Not bad.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Somebody better tell Kanye that.

  13. Winston

    I amused at the “we lost the culture war stuff” lately. I mean I thought that was nothing more than socon nonsense? And sure the woke SJWs were very clear that they think capitalism is racist and anyone who disagrees with them in any way is a violent racist oppressor who is literally engaging in genocide but I never thought they would actually do that since Bad Things Can Not Happen since History and Progress are always on our side,

    • Idle Hands

      these people are in a death spiral I’ve never seen anything like it. The religiosity of the movement is breathtaking. The stunning lack of any rational thought is amazing. This is an amazing hysterical twilight zone esque time to be alive.

      • Winston

        See this is what I mean. These people were very clear on what they wanted and are doing it but you are shocked nevertheless, why?

    • Homple

      History is full of catastrophic stupidity. Why should the 21st Century West be immune from it?

  14. Count Potato

    “An elderly black woman has slammed looters saying they ‘lied’ when they said ‘Black Lives Matter’ and telling them to ‘get a job’ after her Brooklyn store was destroyed in riots.

    Shocking footage posted on social media shows the distraught New Yorker blasting the actions of looters as she stands in front of her shell of a store with its front now exposed and wires seen dangling down from the ceiling.

    ‘The problem that bothers me? You said Black Lives Matter,’ the emotional black woman is heard saying while other people cleaning up the destruction look on.

    ‘I’ve worked here part time and I’m a part owner of this store.

    ‘You said Black Lives Matter. Why don’t you choke me? I’m black!’ she says as she makes a choking gesture on her throat.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8384391/Tell-Black-Lives-Matter-lied-Black-woman-slams-looters-destroying-NYC-store.html

    • Winston

      Aren’t the BLM leaders literal actual communists? Killing the kulaks and race traitors is SOP.

    • Suthenboy

      “slammed looters saying they ‘lied’ when they said ‘Black Lives Matter’ ”

      Ya think?

    • Count Potato

      After a while it just becomes a constant noise you can’t hear like air conditioning.

    • The Other Kevin

      You know, I never thought Trump was a Nazi, but reading such has well-reasoned article has changed my mind.

      Just kidding, but I’ll bet if I put that on Twitter and started writing articles about my “change of heart” I could make a few bucks.

    • Chipwooder

      Drew Magary still exists? Had no idea.

      I remember when he was funny. It was like 7 or 8 years ago.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Now he is a Holocaust denier.

    • JaimeRoberto Delecto

      These people keep trying to convince me that Naziism wasn’t really that bad.

  15. Donation Not Taxation

    FTA: ” The coronavirus pandemic is still ongoing in the US, the health-related toll from which is continuing to climb even as it continues to exact a terrible cost to the US economy.
    Congress is continuing to debate new proposals that could include the possibility of another round of coronavirus stimulus checks.
    One Republican lawmaker has come up with a new idea that would pay people $1,200 to return to work.”

    Suggest return to ancient policy some of US had April 2020?

    “Some states that are reopening parts of their economies have warned employees that they’ll lose their unemployment benefits if they refuse to go back to work for their employers, even if they’re worried about contracting the coronavirus.”

    https://thehill.com/homenews/state-watch/495050-states-telling-workers-theyll-lose-unemployment-benefits-if-they-refuse

    If you like your government-run unemployment insurance program, you can keep your government-run unemployment insurance program, as long as you get people to voluntarily donate to pay for it and you do not make all nongovernmental unemployment insurance illegal. Donation not taxation.

  16. Suthenboy

    “Hong Kong succeeds because its people are free.”

    Too bad that the English did not take a lesson from that.

  17. Plinker762

    Isn’t it a little warm for a full dress?

  18. Pope Jimbo

    What the fuck is wrong with big IT departments?

    Every other Wednesday we have a “guild” meeting where all the developers are supposed to get together and discuss things of interest. Usually someone will give a short demo on something. The theory is that it will lead to us adopting best practices and building apps in a similar manner.

    What gets me is that there are a few (less than 5) people who think that this meeting is a chance for them to shine. They can wave their massive IT dicks around and shame everyone else.

    If they are giving the demo, it is horrible because they spend most of it being condescending as hell. If they are not giving the presentation, they are constantly piping up with comments that add nothing.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Normally, I have logged into this meeting from my phone so I was logged as attending, but went off and did some fishing (ice or boat) or something else. But today, I have another meeting later so I am stuck.

    • Fatty Bolger

      You just described why I don’t like developers. (I’m a developer.) For whatever reason, there’s a definite tendency in the field towards being an opinionated dickhole.

      • Rhywun

        Those guys are angling for a management position.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Our trouble makers are not on the management track. They seem to be on the spectrum.

        They are argumentative and want everyone to do stuff the way they do. Combine that with non existent social skills and you have a horrible presentation.

        The current one today clears his throat every 2 sentences. And he won’t brook any nonsense about other teams not adopting his little utility that he is demoing.

      • Brett L

        Never understood that. If your shot is easier and better than doing it the hard way, every lazy ass dev in the world will adopt it. Except for Angular. I have no idea what problem they were trying to solve, but it wasn’t to lower complexity.

      • Rhywun

        Ha. I’m teaching myself Angular lately. It’s not so bad. Dramatically better than some crappy framework I played with a few years ago that was straight JS.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        Coworker of mine is like that. He’s a nice enough guy. Very charismatic. But he thinks he’s Elon Musk. Every meeting is a marketing pitch where his latest tool is the best thing since sliced bread. The thing is that he has the skills of an entry level dev. Most of the stuff he does involves kludging something together using spreadsheets, onedrive, SharePoint lists, and powerapps. He has gotten bitten more than once by data integrity issues and its clear that he has never studied algorithms or runtime of code.

        A little bit of professional humility, and he’d be the toast of the town. As it is, he’s fairly universally disliked because nothing ever lives up to his promises.

  19. Rhywun

    Woohoo! Just had another ‘vid swab. Wish me luck.

    • Count Potato

      Good luck!

    • SugarFree

      If they took it rectally, that wasn’t a real doctor.

      • Ted S.

        I thought Rhywun liked it taken rectally.

      • Rhywun

        Nope.

      • Playa Manhattan

        That seems…. unfair.

      • Rhywun

        C’est la vie.

      • SDF-7

        Apparently according to SugarFree further down the page, that’s Brett at the overpass…

      • Ted S.

        Brett at the overpass…

        Shaka, when the walls fell.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Rectum! That test nearly killed him!

    • Rhywun

      Results in: “Not-Detected”. I guess that’s good!

      • grrizzly

        That seems like a fast test. No waiting five days to get the results.

      • Rhywun

        I should hope not. I have a procedure tomorrow that wouldn’t take place if I had caught the ‘vid.

        The one I took a month ago also at the same hospital was also fast. Presumably to determine whether I’d wind up in the ‘vid ward or not after my time in the ER.

      • Sensei

        I recall from some other threads you mentioned this. Outpatient?

        Hope you recover quickly and are back here in a day or so.

        We can also see what kind of strange posts you post post anesthesia and/or pain killers!

      • Rhywun

        In and out. I’ll be back tomorrow some time.

      • Count Potato

        Mine took several days.

      • Enough About Palin

        That’s a long time to have a Q-Tip up your ass.

      • slumbrew

        Good luck tomorrow.

      • DEG

        Seconded.

      • Rhywun

        Thx

      • Incentives Matter

        Thirded.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Congratulations?

    • Pope Jimbo

      So do they need to get all your info before taking the test?

      Minnesoda is always begging people to get tested because that somehow will stop the CV, and there are places you can go to get tested for free.

      I was wondering though if it was fast enough for them to do the swab and give you the results while you waited so you could take the test anonymously. Of if they got all your info first. Then if you popped positive they could make you meet with one of their vaunted contact tracers.

      • Rhywun

        They already have all my info from a recent hospital stay. I guess if I was poz they would have sent me home to hide for two weeks. If they had wanted to trace me that would go pretty quick: “I don’t talk to or visit anybody”.

      • Rhywun

        PS. the test took about an hour. I wasn’t going to wait around for that.

    • Chipwooder

      Without looking, I’m going to guess this is one of those Soros-bankrolled DAs?

      • Chipwooder

        *DINGDINGDING*

        Where do I collect my prize?

      • bacon-magic

        You get a St. Louis style pizza, toasted raviolis and a piece of gooey buttercake on me when you visit here.

      • Chipwooder

        Two of the three sound fine – I have heard too many horror stories about STL pizza.

      • bacon-magic

        It is not deep dish or have pineapple. The horror stories are from the haters.

      • Chipwooder

        I’ve been told that the crust is like a saltine and the cheese is some kind of Frankencheese

      • bacon-magic

        I treat it like an appetizer for the main course of toasted ravs.

      • Gender Traitor

        Can confirm. (The latter two are awesome!) Sub some Ted Drewes for the pizza and we’ll talk.

      • bacon-magic

        Ted Drewes. *salivates

      • l0b0t

        Our local ice cream place has an Ooey-Gooey Buttercake flavor with large chunks of buttercake mixed in, It’s quite good.

      • mikey

        Gooey Buttercake
        Learn something everyday here in Gliblandia.
        Will try.

  20. Mojeaux

    Regarding the mask discussion in the last thread:

    There was a very odd bell curve to the masks that I observed. At the beginning and for several weeks, there were few masks about. The last two weeks there was a marked increase, as in, very few people WITHOUT a mask on. THIS week, nobody’s got a mask on.

    Unrelated: An employee at XX’s Walmart has tested positive for the Kung Flu. Per her report, everybody’s freaking out and they have to wear masks and they are suffocating. I do not know if the employee is a carrier or actually sick.

    I believe XX and Mr. Mojeaux have already had it. They were both very sick earlier this year and Mr. Mojeaux was dx’d with pneumonia even though they said, “It’s not pneumonia, but we don’t know what it is.”

    • Count Potato

      A differential diagnosis for pneumonia?

    • CPRM
    • RAHeinlein

      Similar mask curve here. I wear when a store requires (not recommends). Up to this point no one has said a word to me – even at our local Co-op.

      • whiz

        Is that Wheatsfield? Last time my wife was there, she said practically everyone was wearing one. But maybe they don’t comment to those that don’t.

    • R C Dean

      THIS week, nobody’s got a mask on.

      Because the constant drumbeat of DemOp Media Coronapanic has been switched off to make room for the Trump White Supremacist Riots, would be my guess.

    • DEG

      I picked up some dinner from a Nashua bar. Nashua has a city-wide mask mandate: employees have to wear one while within six feet of customers, customers have to wear one while in the business or in the outdoor area of the business.

      When I arrived, another customer was going into the bar. He had no mask on. The staff had no masks on. I didn’t wrap my bandanna around my face. No one said a thing. It was beautiful.

      • UnCivilServant

        Yay!

        Are there any sit-down places upen in the state?

      • DEG

        For indoor dining? No. Outdoor dining only at this time. I would have considered a table outside but there are thunderstorms in the vicinity.

        The Clown Prince has magnanimously and graciously deigned to think about coming up with a plan in a few weeks to allow indoor dining.

        I saw talk of a place in Manchester opening up for indoor dining in defiance of the order, but I’ve heard that will not happen.

        Maine allows indoor dining in all but three counties.

      • UnCivilServant

        Thank you. I’m trying to find someplace to go tomorrow.

      • DEG

        You’re welcome! There was some talk of a few places in the three counties where indoor dining is prohibited opening up in defiance of the orders. I think the plan was to do it next week. I’ll keep an eye on Maine news to see what happens.

  21. SugarFree

    I see Brettly is pretending to be employed again. Getting high and turning tricks at the sex offender overpass is not IT work, it only resembles it.

    • slumbrew

      It’s a more dignified way of making a living.

    • bacon-magic

      You should incorporate an IT Floridaman on the next Hat & Hair. Make him the hydroxy supplier.

    • Brett L

      I’m getting a little old to work the sex offender overpass.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Stop that.

        You’re never too old.

      • jesse.in.mb

        I feel that there’s an Orgazmo quote for this, but don’t feel like searching for it on my work computer.

      • Ted S.

        Gerontophilia is a thing.

      • bacon-magic

        Do you still have your card?

      • Old Man With Candy

        I rely on that.

      • Jarflax

        I’d expect a man of your training not to misspell chloroform that badly.

      • Mad Scientist

        You may be an LA 2, but after the meth rotted out all your teeth, I’ll bet you have Florida men just lining up for a piece of the action.

    • Tonio

      “turning tricks at the sex offender overpass”

      Okay, Allen Ginsberg.

    • Pope Jimbo

      $20 is $20. Don’t let SF make you feel bad about your new career Brett.

      • Enough About Palin

        Yes. Cosider yourself lucky. If you were a woman, you’d only get $17.20 for your efforts.

      • Pope Jimbo

        So what do trannies get? $20 or $17.50?

      • Jarflax

        In what gear?

      • SugarFree

        $30 for the right client. They are a twofer.

  22. SDF-7

    Think we have a good candidate for City Council or Mayor of Philadelphia.

    • PBRstreetgang

      I’ll register in the City just so I can vote for her.

    • DEG

      90 percent black on black crime…where are you Black Lives Matter? why don’t you march on my f—ing block where they’re shooting everybody?

      Because they’d get shot.

      Apropos

    • creech

      Unfortunately, the Democrats are not going to run an Aunt Jemima like her. There is no Republican Party to speak of in Philly. The LP could run Jesus Christ Himself and the Libertarian label behind his name would guarantee less than 2% of the vote.

  23. leon

    For the Bee observer here, I have headline for you:

    “Hong Kong citizens forced to choose between totalitarian state, or falling to china”

    • Tres Cool

      That popped-up in the ‘recommended for you’ youtube, too ?

      • UnCivilServant

        I have a policy to not watch anything YouTube recommends, and to purge cookies when those start to pop up.

    • db

      Love Carl

    • Drake

      I was watching a Koran league game this morning. If they don’t want to get paid this year, I have no shits left to give.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Muslims playing baseball?

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Is horsehide Halal?

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        During the 7th inning stretch they all pray toward Mecca.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        You lose your hand if you’re caught stealing.

      • Ozymandias

        OH, man. Very nice, Mexi.

      • Pope Jimbo

        You have to watch out for the suicide squeeze play.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Now batting, Manny Mohamed.

      • Gender Traitor

        I didn’t know there was a Muslim league!

      • Tonio

        Muslim league?

    • Gender Traitor

      I just want my minor league ball! ***SNIFF!!!*** : (

      • Florida Man

        You’ll get nothing and like!!!

      • Tres Cool

        #MeToo

  24. Winston

    One thing I want to mention about social media and censorship is that classical liberals pretty much took it as a given that the media, educated people, technology-minded people and businessmen would always agree with them. So big business and big media can censor but it was assumed that they would never censor them since educate urbanites would always be classical liberals and their victory was inevitable. The possibility that Twitter or NYT would embrace communism was thought to be impossible just like a communist public school teacher or communist university professor was supposed to be impossible.

    • SDF-7

      As someone who still misses USENET and the distributed nature of uucp and bbs’s, I don’t care as much about social media platforms blocking whomever they want.

      My problem is with cancel culture making sure people they disagree with are blocked at the internet backbone level, ISP level and the *financial* level. If folks are going out of their way to make sure that there is literally no possible way for folks to connect without building their own fiber optic network, it has gone too far. Own server? Sure. But packets going across the backbone should be relatively anonymous (preferably encrypted as much as possible so folks don’t/can’t know. The Internet is supposed to be distributed and peer-based, and I think we should get back to that to tell these self appointed gatekeepers where they can stick it.

    • Idle Hands

      Call the SEC and DOJ seems like a clear case of fraud pump and dump scheme or insider trading at the very least. The press just ran with it because of drumpf but these fuckers are utterly corrupt pieces of shit and should stand public trial and we need to bring back public executions. They knowingly suppressed a drug that may save lives in order to save a couple of months on developing their own treatment option.

    • LJW

      What are the odds there was some political motivation mixed into this?

    • Idle Hands

      He fucking is the head of the fucking city. He’s acting like he’s not in fucking charge. These people are disgraceful.

    • leon

      grappling with an extraordinary crisis, seated in 400 years of American racism…is not the same question as the understandably aggrieved store owner or the devout religious person who wants to go back to services.

      Which religious group is it that wants to go back to services that you have, on many occasions singled out? Oh yeah, the jews. And if we want to talk about centuries of racial animosity….

    • SDF-7

      That 400 years crap (sensitive to it at the moment because I work for a mega-corp and it was cited in a CEO email inviting all of us to a “Moment of Reflection” on how much America sucks or something) really would drive me to drink if I drank.

      The idea that slavery, racism or anything along those lines is uniquely American, was invented just 400 years ago and hasn’t been part of the human condition until the mind and industrialization made it economical to use machines instead of grabbing muscle-based labor is so screwed up I can’t believe any of these saps take it seriously.

      Do I sincerely wish the Founders had been able to tell the South “Hey, you know when we wrote ‘All men’ and that individuals are sovereign… yeah, we really meant that!”? Of course! As put in some of the Floyd articles “So does any sane human”. Were they angels? Of course not! Do I think America at its founding and the principles behind it were a step forward towards liberty that shouldn’t be undermined? Again, duh!

      Rant off… this crap is just starting to get to me. Preaching to the choir here, I know.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Same with my company’s CEO, more or less. Pushing the bullshit racism angle.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Another thing. Why is this all coming out today? No way did this many CEOs wake up this morning and decide to pen those letters on their own.

      • slumbrew

        So far it’s just been an e-mail a couple of days ago from the CEO directing us to a blog post by our (black) head of HR. That’s been it, thankfully.

    • Ozymandias

      Some rights – and animals – are more equal than others. DUH.
      (Also, you have blood guilt ‘cuz whitey.)

      I am so glad I only lived in NYC (Queens) for one year of my life; that was enough to swear me off on it forever.

    • Florida Man

      Sounds like they should give her a ride home or to the hospital. Why was a jail cell on a drunk teen?

  25. LemonGrenade

    Sorry for everyone having a shitty day today. You can lump me into the pot, too. Lost my first moderation battle, even though the boss agreed that it was fine. So the little proggie that was so offended that someone had posted an article that business owners should arm up and defend their stores went to the damn CEO over it, and they showed a stunning lack of leadership. The article made the mistake of saying it’s time to go on offense, and it was decreed that ‘go on offense’ was a direct call to violence. Fuck those guys right in the face.

    • leon

      What is it taht you do?

      • LemonGrenade

        I’m a QA engineer, but the company is small and has been in startup mode for so long that I also did a substantial amount of the moderation on the site, for years. Now we’ve grown, we have a moderation team, and they’re full of proggies with no belief in the first amendment. I can generally stop the worst of it by calling in the lead editor to remind them that just because they don’t like the opinion, if it’s within our guidelines, they need to let it go. This time, we both lost. Over bullshit, because the top executives are proggies with no real respect for the first amendment either.

    • Florida Man

      I’m no lawyer, but saying people should defend their property and people should go looking for a fight are 2 different things.

      • LemonGrenade

        That’s the way they clean out any opinions they don’t like. Anything they dislike is combed over for any technicality they can think of, while stuff they agree with is just ignored. Exactly like how people accuse liberal rags of massaging a story to ‘present a message’. They do. They think their job is to ‘shape the narrative’.

      • Viking1865

        Yep,

        “NO JUSTICE NO PEACE” is not a threat “You loot, we shoot” is a threat. Naturally.

        I am so fucking ready for national divorce.

      • LemonGrenade

        If the pay weren’t so good, I’d quit. I’ve chosen to stick with the ignorance is bliss method, and had very strong words with my boss about the priority of rewriting our moderation system so that I can stop helping that team out. If they want to destroy the brand by making their audience ‘more selective’, I’ll just ride it out until they crash.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Can’t you claim they were mansplaining to you?

      • LemonGrenade

        Ha, the one who took it all the way is a woman, as is the CEO. Best I could do was accuse them of not supporting another woman in the struggle, but since I’m coming down on the side of a right to armed self defense, they don’t give a shit about being sisterly or not.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Perhaps you shouldn’t assume their gender.

      • LemonGrenade

        I’m sure they’re questioning mine, or at least my allegiance to mine (which is well, none), after this.

    • Mojeaux

      Oh, yuck. That bites.

  26. Chipwooder

    LOLWUT?

    David Frum
    @davidfrum
    · 2h
    Replying to @costareports
    When Churchill visited damaged sites in wartime UK, he didn’t need police to bash a path through with clubs and gas

    Can’t we force Canada to take Frum back? Jesus this is a stupid comment.

    • CPRM

      Abe Lincoln didn’t need special security that harassed people every time he went to the theater!

    • Count Potato

      CWAA

      • Tulip

        I still don’t know what that means

      • Gustave Lytton

        Christ, what an asshole.

      • dbleagle

        Tulip is a good person, you could just politely tell her.

        //sarc off//

    • Chipwooder

      I mean, regardless of what you think about what happened in DC, comparing it to Churchill touring bombed sections of London during the Blitz is asinine beyond belief.

      But then. Frum was a dumb enough asshole to call people treasonous for not supporting his beloved Iraq war, so…..

    • Hyperion

      “Can’t we force Canada to take Frum back?”

      When we tried, they complained that they already have enough retards *plots to give us Zoolander*. Build a wall now!

  27. RAHeinlein

    Obama is planning a press conference in the next hour to talk about police reform. JFC.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      If only he were elected to a position of power and influence.

    • SDF-7

      Please God… let someone there just tell him he isn’t President anymore, didn’t do jack and to STFU already. Please…

      • Hyperion

        Yes he did! *looks for links, comes up empty* uh never mind.

    • Hyperion

      I mean he couldn’t stop holding press conferences to talk about that in his 8 years as POTUS, so why is this a surprise? I mean he had completely achieved police accountability and healed all race relationship problems, and then badorangeman.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I’ll bet it involves commissions, and money, lots of money…

      But no busting up police unions.

      • LemonGrenade

        Why can’t that guy shut up and go away? He’s not the president any more. I liked how Bush kept his fucking mouth shut and stayed out of it during the Obama years, despite all kinds of insults he could have taken offense to. Too bad that civility evaporated once the Orange One won. I think most former presidents should go away and hide in shame for the job they’ve done, and only come out for photoops on inauguration day.

  28. DEG

    To protect the safety of their voters, states are mostly allowing mail-in voting, a method President Trump has condemned as “substantially fraudulent,” though he has never offered any evidence of this.

    Seems legit.

    nder his proposal, workers would be eligible for a $1,200 return-to-work bonus as an incentive to get employers and the economy moving again.

    “Through a Return To Work Bonus — which would allow workers to keep up to two weeks of unemployment benefits if they accept a job offer — we can make sure these temporary job losses don’t turn into permanent ones,” Brady said in a press release by way of explaining his idea.

    How about you lean on Gauleiter, Gauleiterin, and the Clown Prince that keep fucking over their economies?

    Today, about 350,000 of the territory’s people hold British National (Overseas) passports and another 2.5 million would be eligible to apply for them. At present, these passports allow visa-free access to the United Kingdom for up to six months.
    If China imposes its national security law, the British government will change our immigration rules and allow any holder of these passports from Hong Kong to come to the UK for a renewable period of 12 months and be given further immigration rights, including the right to work, which could place them on a route to citizenship.

    That’s better than a strongly worded letter.

    • leon

      Aren’t the british woried that they are alienating themselves from Europe? Europe has chosen to go with China over US because of Trump. Whycome the british are choosing to stand up to china?

      • Hyperion

        “Whycome the british are choosing to stand up to china?”

        *Pulls up article from The Atlantic* ‘Why Great Britain will regret crossing China and how China will win’*.

        OK, not a real article, yet, but in 3…2…. *Pens own article ‘Why The Atlantic is a bigger piece of shit rag than the NYT’*.

  29. Hyperion

    Uncle Joe Liawatha inches closer to being the official Dem nominee.”

    I mean she won’t be the ‘official’ nominee, she’ll just be the one in charge, along with the ‘shadow’ cabinet, consisting of Gulag Barbie and other far left wack jobs. SloJo will just sit in the corner drooling and rambling incoherently. If that doesn’t make you pause to ponder, what will?

  30. DEG

    NH Lockdown and protest double standard

    T he “Live Free or Die” state has been locked down for almost three months. Last week, 17 times as many Granite Staters filed for unemployment as did in the same period a year earlier. About 200,000 New Hampshire workers have filed for unemployment since Governor Chris Sununu declared a state of emergency March 13 and followed up with a stay-at-home order March 27. To put that in perspective, the U.S. Census reports that New Hampshire’s total 2017 employment was 603,923.

    Last Friday, Sununu extended his stay-at-home order for a third time, guaranteeing more people will lose their jobs. He also threatened legal action against Riverside Speedway and Adventure Park in Groveton, N.H., forcing the track to remain closed. His stay-at-home order carries a potential $20,000 fine for businesses that defy him and possible arrest and criminal prosecution for anyone else failing to follow the various micromanaged edicts he has issued. (You can use equipment at the gym if you pay for a personal trainer to follow you around, but not on your own. Out-of-staters must quarantine for 14 days before staying in a hotel. Hair-cutting is OK, but dye jobs are not. Golf-course employees must wear masks at all times even when eating lunch alone in a break room. Etc.)

    Then on Saturday, he tweeted: “I called the organizers ahead of the #GeorgeFloyd March in Manchester to let them know the State of NH stands with them in their calls for justice.”

    • Winston

      Thank goodness for Sununu who is one of those Sensible Republicans with the right temperament and speaking skills.

      • Chipwooder

        The law-abiding, once again, are the suckers.

        What happens when they start to admit come to grips with it and admit that they’re being played?

      • Winston

        I swear that even many libertarians would willingly go the killing fields if the Great Leader went to Harvard, could read well off a teleprompter and had the right background and drank the right wine.

        And the actual Pol Pot was well off, had connections to royalty and foreign educated by the way

    • R C Dean

      As much as I am opposed to people throwing bricks and molotov cocktails, I have to say if someone started doing so in the general direction of the NH statehouse and governor’s mansion, I would completely understand.

      • LemonGrenade

        The arrogance is breath-taking. And even though my mother doesn’t live in any of the states that refused to bring out the national guard, she called me up, really really angry that DeBlasio could sit there and explain that mass protesting was okay, but the rest of NYC had to keep sucking it up. They’re not even trying to pretend any more, they’re openly saying ‘fuck you, that’s why.’

      • blackjack

        We’re right there with ya’ll. I’m still not allowed to go back to work. At least they’re paying me not to. But, yeah, we have mandatory masks whenever you step outside ( I constantly violate that one) stores get criminal charges if they allow you to go maskless ( I obey that because I don’t want to get someone else in trouble.) Now we have bedtime (curfew) every night. AND they started making us wait in line at the stores again. They had a maximum amount of customers allowed inside at one time, so the stores were throttling customers. Just like Bernie’s breadline fantasy. Fucking bunch of retards.

    • Chipwooder

      I mean, read this big pile of words:

      Those that want to compare social injustices and the issue surrounding the murder of George Floyd to the effectiveness of a stay-at-home order and social gatherings are completely missing the point. They are two completely separate issues and those that try to combine those two issues . . . they’re doing an absolute disservice to the importance of the message around those protests, the importance of the message around the injustices.

      “It’s totally different, because shut up.”

      • R C Dean

        Those that want to compare social injustices and the issue surrounding the murder of George Floyd to the effectiveness of a stay-at-home order and social gatherings are completely missing the point.

        We’re not the ones missing the point, bub. We aren’t comparing police abuse to social distancing and lockdowns (which would be really stupid), you are.

        We are just pointing out the drooling irrationality of your strict business lockdown orders, on the one hand, and your cheering on of an event which will violate the shit out of social distancing. And that’s the best case scenario, assuming it doesn’t turn into another riot.

      • slumbrew

        This is a “stupid or liar?” situation – is he too stupid to understand what is being compared, or does he understand it perfectly but is just lying about what the complaint is.

        It’s “liar” of course, but he’s free to claim “stupid”.

      • leon

        No no. It’s impossible to get the virus if you are protesting for good

    • creech

      All these governors know it is far easier to arrest one businessman for breaking “the law” than it is to arrest ten thousand protesters roaming the streets.

  31. RAHeinlein

    Just received this from the Art Institute of Chicago:

    The recent atrocities compound the disproportionate toll the COVID-19 pandemic has taken on communities of color, amplifying inequitable hardship and losses. While so many of us are saddened and outraged, we acknowledge, with respect and empathy, that this pain and anger is particularly acute in black communities across Chicago and the country. Our compassion and support is with these communities, particularly in Chicago, and especially with our own black staff members.

    However, this cannot simply be a time for words. Museums are contested sites; we are not neutral. We have the ability to play a constructive role in civic discourse. This is a time for self-reflection, a time for us to thoughtfully understand the best ways to advance racial justice. We recognize both the specific limitations of our authority as well as the boundless potential of an art museum to give shape and structure to new narratives. Grief will transform into action.

    As we reflect on our past, we are accountable for our museum’s legacy of white privilege and exclusion, not only in the representation of artists of color in our collection but also of those in our community who have historically felt unwelcome in our spaces. That legacy is antithetical to the museum we aspire to be. We have been investing resources, and will extend those commitments, to create meaningful change.

    I REALLY like my membership, but looks like not renewing…

    • bacon-magic

      Open your doors wide to the mob then suckers.

    • The Other Kevin

      I’d be willing to take some of those problematic Renaissance and 19th Century paintings off their hands.

    • R C Dean

      Somebody needs to let BLM and antifa know that the Art Institute is built on white privilege and exclusion.

    • Ted S.

      They should display Mirth & Girth again.

    • blackjack

      Yeah, they’ll be mourning the loss of Beverly Hills and Santa Monica for decades. Fucking pathetic liars.

  32. DEG

    grizzly, on the other thread you mentioned ordering a “FUCK SOCIAL DISTANCING” t-shirt. Where did you order it from?

    • grrizzly

      Some random website that lets you “design” your own t-shirt, designashirt.com.

      • DEG

        Thanks!

  33. Chipwooder

    Just a few days ago, Yale epidemiologist Gregg Gonsalves, was literally accusing President Trump of “genocide” for not taking stronger measure to contain Covid-19. Today, he signed the “protests against racism are more important than stopping the spread of Covid-19” letter.

    Welcome to Clown World.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Once you realize that shit was 10 percent disease prevention and 90 percent political bullshit it all makes sense.

    • mikey

      “No matter how cynical you get it’s never enough to keep up.”
      – Lily Tomlin

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Well now you know Gregg is far more scared of being called a racist than he is of the disease.

      • Rhywun

        I think that’s a rational assessment for a lot of people.

      • wdalasio

        I don’t think it’s fear. I think this guy really is so much of a living breathing sack of shit that he does this sort of thing voluntarily.

  34. Winston

    <https://mises.org/wire/richard-cobden-exemplar-liberty-property-and-peace

    The progress of freedom depends more upon the maintenance of peace, the spread of trade, and the diffusion of education, than upon the labors of cabinets and foreign offices.

    Here is Richard Cobden on explicitly connecting trade with the “progress of freedom”. Oh and connecting freedom with education. And who pray tell would provide this education? Public schools of course!

    • leon

      Clearly you think then that prosperity is linked to the work of cabinet officials.

    • CPRM

      Looks like Jeremy Piven really lost it after getting #MeToo’d.

      • C. Anacreon

        99% chance nekkid dude is in an episode of acute mania.

    • Pope Jimbo

      What is the deal with all the little jackals that run in and sucker punch people from behind?

      I’m not saying that we fought fair 100% of the time, but I don’t remember that kind of shit. The only time I remember anyone doing that was in Okinawa and the guy who threw the punch from behind got mocked for it the next day.

      • JD is in the United Karendom

        Pissant little cowards is what they are.

    • JD is in the United Karendom

      Good grief. A purple car? When was the last time you saw one of them. 1976?

      It’s about time it came back around.

      • Chipwooder

        I had one in the early 2000s, a 1997 Grand Am GT. Stylin!

      • Chipwooder

        Looked exactly like this……only not, you know, beat to hell.

      • JD is in the United Karendom

        Squirrels ain’t down wit no purple whip

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        There was actually a small revival of purple cars over here around 2008 or so. Unless you’re a a pimp or a modern day Roman Emperor you shouldn’t be driving one.

      • JD is in the United Karendom

        I identify as both, if that helps.

      • Florida Man

        Dodge still uses plum crazy for its muscle cars.

      • Ted S.

        I drive one.

    • Chipwooder

      I’ve always disliked doctors and nurses in general. Arrogant motherfuckers.

      • C. Anacreon

        I think you meant to say “present company excluded, of course”.

      • UnCivilServant

        “in General” covered exceptions for “in Particular”.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Doesn’t that get the #covidiots hashtag?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Maybe if the antilockdown protesters had rioted they’d have actually made some progress. That’s my takeaway from all of this.

    • Drake

      Same arrogant assholes who say I shouldn’t work, eat at restaurants, or go to the gym?

    • Ted S.

      It’s her parents, right?

      • commodious spittoon

        Spanish dingo. Which is weird, you rarely see them in Portugal.

      • Chipwooder

        Shockingly, no – 43 year old German man

      • R C Dean

        I see the police are asking if anyone remembers seeing a couple of cars.

        13 years ago. I’m not optimistic they can actually prove much of anything.

    • R C Dean

      There was a QAnon(ish) theory that she was snatched by John Podesta and/or his brother, who were supposedly staying just a few blocks away when she disappeared, if memory serves.

      Ah, the good old days, when you could point and laugh at conspiracy theories.

      • commodious spittoon

        We’ll know for sure when the German bloke also doesn’t kill himself.

      • Ted S.

        We’ll learn it was like Strangers in a Train, with Maddy McCann’s parents killing JonBenet Ramsey and Ramsey’s parents killing Maddy.

      • Urthona

        except it turns out the Ramsey killer really was not the parents and they caught the guy .

      • Urthona

        on nm. i’m wrong.

    • Playa Manhattan

      “The first vehicle is a distinctive VW T3 Westfalia campervan”

      100% guarantee it’s the crime scene.

  35. Scruffy Nerfherder

    They’re protesting at the corner down from my business. I guess I’m going back in to secure things.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Time to warm up killhugdozer.

    • Florida Man

      Good luck. Hopefully it stays peaceful.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yeah. Wife is freaking out. I’m not particularly concerned but if things start to get rowdy I know the cops will get there quickly because of the apartments across the street.

    • Sean

      Take a rifle and a friend with a rifle.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Mossberg Shockwave 12ga and my 9mm will be with me at all times.

      • Chipwooder

        It’s times like these that I really wish I could get my hands on an HK MR308

      • Drake

        Looks it up – wow that is one really expensive AR-10. Is it different than the MR762? That makes the Sig piston ARs look cheap.

      • R C Dean

        Good choices. I’d opt for a shotgun/handgun combo rather than a rifle. Take extra mags!

    • EvilSheldon

      Good luck, dude. Head on a swivel.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      And this is a non-event. My store manager oversold the situation by a long shot.

      Thankfully.

      Probably wait till the sun goes down and see if anything changes, but I doubt it. Costco is a block away and I presume that the local cops are not going to let any riot activity slide around here between them and the apartment buildings across the street.

      • Viking1865

        I saw the county cops here whip a car out of a parking lot to follow a skinny anarchist on a bicycle.

      • Ted S.

        When I got on the highway on the way to work this morning (5:40 AM), a cop car pulled onto the highway behind me and turned on his lights, which unsurprisingly made me nervous. Thankfully he accelerated, passed everybody, and went who knows where, although in the parking lot at work I thought I could hear fire truck sirens.

      • EvilSheldon

        Non-events are best events.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Jeez, the transcript reads like they’ve both had a stroke.

      • creech

        As with Obama, I can’t stand to listen for more than 30 seconds. Clinton was the last articulate president. But then I couldn’t listen to him for more than 30 seconds either.

      • Ted S.

        The other nun couldn’t reach that far.

  36. UnCivilServant

    I’m getting fed up with Audible.

    I have one simple use case – I listen to audiobooks in my car.

    Even when the stereo was working correctly, the only format I could use was mp3, but mp3 doesn’t support DRM, so Audible doesn’t support it. And every so often something gets changed so the hoops I have to jump through need to be reengineered to work again.

    It’s like they don’t want my money.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Oh they do, they definitely do…

      I had to unsubscribe from them about three times for it to stick.

      • Tres Cool

        So you’ve met Sirius too ?

    • commodious spittoon

      This is why I like stereos with a simple audio jack. I carry around a media player already, my car system just needs to be a set of speakers.

      • UnCivilServant

        The car didn’t come with an audio jack.

        Now I just have a pair of portable speakers on the dash.

      • commodious spittoon

        Which makes no sense to me. A stereo isn’t an iPhone, you don’t need to eliminate useful ports to slim it down more, in fact I think the box is pretty standardized for after-market accessorizing? It’s been a long time since I’ve been in the market for a new car, let alone a new car stereo. So why not keep the admittedly antiquated 3.5mm jack next to the USB.

        My car is so old there’s a jack and a USB port built into the console next to the lighter.

      • UnCivilServant

        I never did understand car designers.

        Though I prefer imperial over metric interfaces. 😀

      • whiz

        My car is so old there’s a jack and a USB port built into the console next to the lighter.

        You have a USB port? I need a lighter to USB converter.

      • UnCivilServant

        Your car has a cigarette lighter?

      • C. Anacreon

        He had three cigarettes in the car, then threw one out and made the car a cigarette lighter.

      • slumbrew

        Compared to speakers plonked on the dash?

      • UnCivilServant

        No wireless link to futz around with. Wired is elegant and easier.

      • UnCivilServant

        Plus I already own the current solution.

      • slumbrew

        Plus I already own the current solution.

        Point taken.

      • Sean

        That seems inelegant. Did you attach them to the dash or are they free to move around?

      • UnCivilServant

        Yes.

        The geometry of the section of the dash where they’re sitting plus the nonskid surface means they don’t actually move .

    • R C Dean

      That sucks. I listen to Audible through Bluetooth in my car. Works pretty good.

      • UnCivilServant

        I never managed to get the bluetooth to work.

    • Ayn Random Variation

      That’s a satire site I assume?

    • Rhywun

      OFFS

    • Lady Z

      How long until children are turning in parents for thoughtcrime?

      • UnCivilServant

        Why did you let them go to public school?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Why don’t hold a town hall to address all the kids traumatized by the rioting and looting?

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      I tried, but these felt hands don’t pack much of a wallop. Instead, I invited STEVE SMITH to crash on my couch for a few days.

    • gbob

      The muppet uprising will make Hati look tame in comparison.

  37. LCDR_Fish

    Those are some weird shore patrol stories earlier although I think going back to WWII they ring a little familiar.

    These days shore patrol is just a duty section. Granted I’ve only been stationed on small boys, not carriers or LHDs. Nowadays it’s just a half dozen folks from the duty section driving around popular areas with the van waiting to take folks back to the ship if they get in trouble or do something stupid.

  38. LCDR_Fish

    I think what probably bugs me more than anything else about this whole situation is that I can get almost nothing done.

    I had to search around a ton of Lowes before I finally drove 5 hrs roundrtrip last week to find what I needed in stock.

    I want to order a crapton of stuff from ikea (it matches what I’ve already got and my aesthetic) and I can only wait a month for est delivery….now a few stores are open but not the one near me….

    Been in my new place over a month and they still haven’t buried the cable lines I need for internet access….

    So frustrating.

    • Ayn Random Variation

      Wayfair seems to have everything.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      That would the upcoming generation of the Democrats. Hahvahd educated and brains full of shit. Never worked a day in the real world and coddled along.

    • Ayn Random Variation

      Salmah Rizvi is a strange name for a white supremacist.

      • UnCivilServant

        Change the gamma on your monitor.

      • Sean

        How are things in center city?

    • Winston

      This country is done. People who literally hate what America is, who seek to destroy us, are the elites of our society.

      Foreseeable consequences are foreseeable…

      And what are we going to do about it? Rise up? Surrender? Vote for Trump or wait until 2024?

      • Mojeaux

        And what are we going to do about it? Rise up? Surrender?

        Existential questions are existential.

      • Florida Man

        Rise up for what? The majority of humans don’t want freedom. I’m not dying for a slightly different flavor of statism.

    • DEG

      Yikes. I heard about that storm. A friend of mine lost power at his restaurant and had to shut down. No lunch take-out today for him.

  39. UnCivilServant

    So, the reason I’ve never heard about Total War Troy is because Creative Assembly seems to be aiming for the Biggest shitstorm they can – New Studio, First Title, Epic Exclusive, Denuvo, No cross-platform compatability… It’s as if they’re aiming for all the gamer red flags and berzerk buttons.

    • Hyperion

      I never could get into the Total War games. I like Mount and Blade Bannerlord a lot though.

      • UnCivilServant

        Have they fixed the economy yet?

      • Hyperion

        I don’t know, I just like getting on the battlefield and killing everyone, looting, and building up my skills and my army. I’m going to eventually explore the other aspects of the game, but the battlefield combat is da shit. It’s early access still, so we’ll see.

        The Total War game Britannia I thought looked beautiful, although the ratings were bad. The problem is I did not feel compelled to purchase it because I own all of the previous ones that got rave reviews, I could not get into any of them.

      • UnCivilServant

        From what I hear Britannia was crap.

        I didn’t play it.

      • Hyperion

        Did you play the new one, the China one? I played the first 3 and did not get into any of them, regardless of the great reviews. I guess just not my type of game.

      • UnCivilServant

        I did not play China.

        I’m still waiting for Warhammer 3.

  40. Sean

    Follow up on the dentist visit this am. So weird, plastic zip walls up and other CV related “safety” measures. The hygienist was new (to me) and I couldn’t even figure out if she was cute because she was so encumbered with PPE. ?

    • Gustave Lytton

      +1 beersafety goggles

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Did you at least get to enjoy some laughing gas? If I could have a tank of that stuff next to my couch I’d be a happy man.

      • Hyperion

        I remember tripping on that shit as a kid when they were removing some tooth for some reason. It was way far whacked out shit.

      • Sean

        Nope. Just a routine visit and cleaning.

        The last time I tried the gas (many years ago) I didn’t enjoy it.

    • DEG

      I like how this gallery opens.

  41. hayeksplosives

    My employer occasionally breaks up the monotony by declaring certain days to dress in a particular color or to wear sports jerseys, etc.

    They just sent us an email for this Friday: wear a Hawaiian style shirt as you work from home!

    I have to assume the head of HR either doesn’t do social media or is a troll.

    • hayeksplosives

      Sigh. Dead thread. I’ll alert you if we make the news 🙂

    • Hyperion

      I had a client whose CEO wore a Hawaiian shirt very day to work. I am seriously not shitting you. I never saw the guy not wearing onr for at least 5 years when I worked with them. And it was not a mom and pop shop, I think the chance you would recognize them right off if I named them is way north of 50%.

      • Hyperion

        Sorry, CIO.

  42. Hyperion

    Damn, is this quote ever relevant today for the apologist democrats, covering for antifa scum.

    Winston Churchill, who understood them well, once said.

    “Each one hopes that if he feeds the crocodile enough it will eat him last.”

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      That presumes the feeders know they’re in danger. The apologist Dems are too deluded to realize even that.