Friday Morning Stepping Into Sunlight Links

by | Jun 5, 2020 | Daily Links | 627 comments

Guess what? I’m not Sloopy. But unlike other people around here (cough, cough, Brett), he’s got a good excuse for slacking, what with helping out Banjos in these difficult days. True story: while they were out here, I went over to their hotel to pick up Sloopy, I hadn’t actually met their kids before (no idea why they would want to keep them away from me, a harmless old… wait, nevermind), but had certainly seen lots of pictures and videos of them over the years. As they came running out to see who Mommy and Daddy were talking to, I greeted the first one, “Hi, Libby!” She stopped and stared at me, then demanded accusingly, “HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME?” I gave her a manic grin, tapped my forehead, and said, “Because I’m SMART.” Large eyes, shrink back, stay close to Banjos. It was hilarious. I love freaking out kids.

And I also love birthdays, other than my own. Today’s include the guy who cemented Billy the Kid’s fame; the real Frito Bandito; the guy we all are now; the most entertaining human to ever play in the NFL; a guy who rose to fame by lying to us about Vietnam; a guy whose story had a true happy ending; a terrific scriptwriter and comic actor; and a guy with a very large penis.

Oh, the theme? It’s 112 degrees outside. Fuck stepping into the light, I’m staying in. And tossing out some news links for discussion. Starting with…

 

“Looka me, I’m relevant again! Gimme money!”

 

Rand Paul, racist. I particularly like the quotes at the end from Senator Resting Bitch Face: ” I cannot feel that openness and rawness that I just heard expressed by my friends Cory and Kamala. I have not lived their life.” Translation: “Willie Brown didn’t want to bang me.”

 

If true, this should be entertaining.

 

“Look, their union is a massive contributor to my campaign, which shows that they’re the good guys.”

 

I’m sure if this cop had racial sensitivity training, this wouldn’t have happened.

 

More cops who need racial sensitivity training.

 

It’s hard to beat WaPo for sheer stupidity.

 

Old Guy Music today is a bittersweet and contemplative tune from one of my favorite singer/songwriters and a good friend of SP’s and mine.

About The Author

Old Man With Candy

Old Man With Candy

Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me. Wait, wrong book, I'll find something else.

627 Comments

  1. Count Potato

    “She stopped and stared at me, then demanded accusingly, “HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME?””

    Smart kid.

    • AlmightyJB

      I just want to know if she practiced good trigger control when she reached for her gun.

      • Count Potato

        She’s from Texas.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        * says nothing this one time *

  2. Pat

    “Looka me, I’m relevant again! Gimme money!”

    Always relevant

    • Drake

      I actually saw Jesse Jackson on some eruo-trash news show. He did not look good – did he have a stroke or something?

      • Ted S.

        Wasn’t Hymietown Jackson diagnosed Parkinson’s some years back?

      • Festus

        Slow, lingering death is the best death for some people.

      • Rhywun

        I just want to know what’s propping up that gigantic head.

      • Jarflax

        The adulation of silly white liberals.

  3. Rebel Scum

    “Looka me, I’m relevant again! Gimme money!”

    Race grifters gotta grift.

    • AlmightyJB

      I’d like to see someone start a GoFundMe for the families of white people killed by cops.

      • Rebel Scum

        I’d like the news media to do their jobs and show the actual crime statistics where in a black person is 50 times more likely to be murdered by a black person than a white person. That’s the real problem in the black community but aren’t supposed to talk about it.

    • Idle Hands

      The level of pandering that is going on is sickening. Nobody is down with any cause if you’re sponsored by pepsi you are being fucking used like a cum rag only to be disposed of later.

    • The Other Kevin

      This really bothers me. At first this seemed like an issue of police brutality, and just about everyone in the country was on the same page. If it stayed that way, there was a good chance we might have seen some change for the good. But now we’re back to fighting about race and politics, and absolutely nothing will change. The conspiracy theorist in me says that was deliberate. Divide and conquer.

      • Idle Hands

        I don’t think that’s even conspiracy anymore it’s what happened. Nobody gave a shit about the protests or the protesters until the rioting and looting started.

      • Mojeaux

        Nobody gave a shit about the protests or the protesters until the rioting and looting started.

        So…it was effective.

      • Idle Hands

        yep.

      • Rhywun

        *falls off chair*

      • R C Dean

        Wait til we see what kind of Marxist garbage they pack into the bill before you get too excited. My guess is their support for ending QI is purely pretextual, to get some steaming pile of Marxist garbage across the finish line.

      • Nephilium

        Hell, I’m just happy to see someone talking about police reform in general other then Rand and us. Of course, the Republicans could probably make good inroads by taking up criminal justice reform in general. But why would they want to do that…

      • leon

        Because they are going to stupidly go for the “70% of americans think something should be done about the riots” so we have to take the hard ass law and order stance.

  4. Juvenile Bluster

    Biden says that 10-15% of Americans are bad people and this is somehow controversial? Maybe it’s controversial because he’s underestimating? Because it’s way more than that.

    • Nephilium

      I think we would disagree with Joe about which 10-15% are bad people.

    • UnCivilServant

      If I wanted to play the same games as certain large groups of people, I’d point out that 13% of the population is black, so clearly Biden is being racist with his 10-15% bad people remarks.

      • WTF

        Don’t you dare point out that that 13% of the population is responsible for more than 50% of the murders and manslaughter.
        Because that’s totes racist and cancels the lived experience of black bodies, or something.

      • UnCivilServant

        It isn’t even that whole 13%, it’s a smaller sub-population of that 13%.

    • juris imprudent

      Isn’t that about the percentage of people that work for govt at all levels?

    • Idle Hands

      meh.

    • leon

      Bad? I don’t think 1 in 6 people are murderers and thieves. So where are we drawing the line as someone being a bad person.

      • Festus

        People that are irredeemable. See? Easy, barely an inconvenience!

      • Jarflax

        Committed to socialism?

    • The Last American Hero

      It’s the proportion of women who will call out a powerful Senator for attempted rape vs. staying quiet.

  5. Count Potato

    Oh crap, the wordpress cancer is back. First plague, economic destruction, murder hornets, riots, and now this.

  6. Yusef drives a Kia

    Nonsense, it’s 114 outside.
    Howdy!

    • Nephilium

      It’s a nice 69 here. Supposed to get up to 85 today, then sunny and the 70’s all weekend. Entertainment venues (with the exception of amusement parks) are able to open up again on Wednesday the 10th.

      When I was in an upscale shopping area a couple days back, it was packed. I saw all of four people that weren’t working somewhere wearing a mask.

    • UnCivilServant

      It is 72 out and 73% humidity at the airport, which means it’s probably 90-100% humidity at my house. When it hits 85 later today, I’m going to melt.

      • juris imprudent

        I was late getting up and out for my walk yesterday, and damn near melted; so this morning the alarm went off so I didn’t repeat that mistake.

    • Festus

      Mornin’ Bob! Short cans!

    • R C Dean

      A very pleasant 74 degrees right now. Wait, 75. Hold on, 76. . . . .

  7. Pat

    Almost exactly four years after Russian operatives hacked into the email accounts of prominent Democrats ahead of the 2016 election…

    And other fun fables you can tell around the campfire.

    • Rhywun

      But… but… PHISHING! OH NOES!

      • Festus

        They’re like a terrier with a rope toy. They just can’t let it go.

      • AlexinCT

        Tell the lie enough times…..

    • Count Potato

      They should turn off the lights, and hold flashlights under their chins, on CNN.

      Or you know, just shut off the lights, and go home.

    • WTF

      They claimed without evidence.

      • AlexinCT

        Social Justice warriors don’t need facts or logic to make their case, you racist/misogynist/homophobe!

  8. robc

    The statesman who should attempt to direct private people in what manner they ought to employ their capitals would not only load himself with a most unnecessary attention, but assume an authority which could safely be trusted, not only to no single person, but to no council or senate whatever, and which would nowhere be so dangerous as in the hands of a man who had folly and presumption enough to fancy himself fit to exercise it. — The Economics Birthday Boy

    No, not Keynes. It is also Adam Smith’s birthday.

    • robc

      Quote ripped off from cafe hayek.

      Also this was there: “June 5th is given on Adam Smith’s grave as the date of his birth in 1723.”

      • The Last American Hero

        STEVE SMITH NO RELATION, BUT HE REMEMBER TIME HE CATCH BUTCHER, BREWER AND BAKER TAKING GOODS TO MARKET. FUN TIMES. STEVE SMITH NOT BENEVOLENT. AND BY NOT BENEVOLENT MEAN RAPE.

  9. Pat

    It’s hard to beat WaPo for sheer stupidity.

    To be fair, cop shows and movies pretty much universally suck. Broken clock and all that.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      I’m convinced that Law & Order SVU is a big part of the problem. Stabler roughs up suspects because they “deserve” it, and we’re supposed to cheer.

      And it’s been the same for a long time. It happened in radio police dramas in the 50s. There’s a couple of episodes of Dragnet where Friday is arresting someone who killed a cop (alone, just Friday, his partner, and the suspect), and somehow while they’re putting cuffs on the suspect just happens to pull away and pull out a gun and they’re forced to kill him.

      I’m sure if you looked at novels and stories from before that you’d see the same thing.

      • Pat

        The copsucking is bad enough, but I mean it’s not even good storytelling or entertainment either. Insipid, formulaic dookie.

      • Mojeaux

        Vigilantism is a safety valve/mechanism/way to feel safe.

        I blame SVU for helicopter parents, stranger danger overreaction, and anti-free-range do-gooders. /nosarc

      • WTF

        I also blame those shows for convictions of innocent people. They think real life is just like the show, and there is absolutely no question regarding the accuracy of forensic “science” and prosecution “experts”.

      • Jarflax

        +9001 fiber analysis based convictions.

        Seriously, a single minute’s thought would tell you that in a world of industrially produced cloth there can never be a fiber analysis that directly ties one person or vehicle to a crime. “The fibers were rayon #23476 an EXACT match for the trunk carpet in defendant’s car!” GUILTY!

        Never mind that 1. there are literally millions of the exact same car out there and 2. The fabric is probably used in 10,000 other applications, and 3. The ‘analysis’ process is some dude with a BS looking through a microscope and pretending he can distinguish almost identical materials.

      • Deplorableme

        I blame social media. My wife has this group called Moms of (insert city name here), and its circle jerk of Karens.

      • UnCivilServant

        Rewatching old detective shows, I find myself going “You didn’t prove anything.” “That won’t hold up in court.” or even “You implicated yourself, detective dumbass”

      • Gdragon

        You’re not supposed to feel bad for the L&O criminals because we “know” that they are guilty, don’t be so silly.

        Honestly the point where I stopped watching L&O was when I realized that is basically the whole deal.

      • Raven Nation

        Watching L&O was the beginning of my anti-cop thinking (although I still love the Lenny Briscoe character).

      • Agent Cooper

        Early L&O had Michael Moriarity telling a black female character that if she wanted to confront racism, she should look in the mirror.

      • l0b0t

        Moriarity has a beautiful way of calling someone “Sir” and making sound like an insult. I love me some Sam Waterston, but Moriarity was the best ADA on the series.

      • The Last American Hero

        I stopped when it became clear that Jill Hennesy was keeping her clothes on.

      • Rebel Scum

        Law & Order SVU

        I hate this show. The cops are hyper-emotional (and therefor compromised) and treat the accused with contempt even from the get-go before they know anything. I might be biased because that has been my experience with cops. I have been treated with disdain and contempt from the outset of interaction simply for speeding. Fuckers could at least be respectful since I pay their salaries.

      • Festus

        *shrugs* I used to watch CSI for the tiddies.

      • Overt

        I read some lawyer saying that shows like CSI had lead to juries raising their standards of evidence. Basically, they expected if you were going to charge someone, you obviously had to be able to find pollen on their shoes that has a 100% DNA match to the plot of grass where the victim was found, and such.

        But then I later read that this has merely led to an over reliance on “Expert Witnesses” who basically say whatever their client tells them to, with the authority of SCIENCE!

      • kbolino

        Every metric is gameable.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        an over reliance on “Expert Witnesses” who basically say whatever their client tells them to, with the authority of SCIENCE!

        Wow, I hope this trend doesn’t escape the courtroom and start being used to influence society as a whole.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Ummmmm, I’ve got some bad news….

    • Rebel Scum

      Starsky and Hutch (with Ben Stiller) was good. But that may be because it was a parody.

      • Pat

        Reno 911 too. I forgot about cop parodies.

      • Rebel Scum

        And, of course, Super Troopers.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      If I go back in time, I’m going to strangle Dick Wolf in his crib.

      • Festus

        That’s a pretty happening name though. Imagine showing up for Freshman year in a new school when you’re 13 and when the teacher calls roll you get to put your blasting hand up.

      • Jarflax

        Kids can make anything an insult. “Oh wow you like dick so much you just wolf it right down”

        I am apparently still a kid.

      • Festus

        Touche.

  10. Rebel Scum

    Emotional debate erupts over anti-lynching legislation as Cory Booker and Kamala Harris speak out against Rand Paul amendment

    Murder is already illegal, as is “lynching”. Fuck off, you (actual) racist cuntes.

    • Festus

      I love the screen capture image. They appear so diplomatic and Senatorial. Why wouldn’t we put our trust in these obviously well qualified, sober-minded representatives?

      • AlexinCT

        Especially the ones that live behind tall walls and have armed guards while telling the rest of us we should disarm and be at their mercy…

  11. Rufus the Monocled

    A stat I saw was 19 unarmed whites were killed by police in 2019. Nine unarmed blacks.

    Can those 19 join Sharpton’s Shakedown march?

    Sad as it is, 28 isn’t a whole lot of people though.

    • Not an Economist

      Can those 19 join Sharpton’s Shakedown march?

      Nope, there lives don’t matter.

      /sarc

      • Drake

        You are racist if you suggest they did matter.

        /not sarc

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Rufus: ALL LIVES MATTER!
        Lebron: GET HIM!

      • AlexinCT

        Be careful. For some reason saying all lives matter now means that you are not accepting the demand your life be ruined and that you deal with that unless you are one of the anointed few….

        What a fucking shitshow this whole thing has become. Thanks president uniter (Black Jesus)!

      • Tundra

        How about this:

        My life matters.

        The rest of you fuckers are on your own!

    • Agent Cooper

      In almost 60+ million interactions with police, those numbers are startingly low.

      • Jarflax

        Shhh, don’t even hint that mostly cops aren’t out of control assholes. Everyone will pile on and destroy you.

      • The Last American Hero

        Most aren’t. A few are, and about half stand around with their dicks in their hand while the bad guys ruin their reputation. The other half is too busy purchasing Punisher and thin blue line stickers for their cars to notice the bad ones.

      • leon

        ^^^^ THIS

        It’s not that every cop is a murderer. It’s that the profession doesn’t give a shit about rooting out and eliminating the murderers from their ranks. I’ve had a cop fucking tell me that the guy who shot a kid in the back as he was fleeing was justified.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        No accountability, no change.

        I don’t care how many good, racially sensitive cops you have. This is about power, and cops, as an institution, have a shitload of power.

      • Jarflax

        There a re a few bad apples. There are also structures that lead decent cops to end up doing bad things. My point is that the people becoming cops are not all that different from the people who became cops back in the era when Peel’s Principles governed. The problem is that instead of Peel’s Principles we have Rules of Engagement in a war on X. Policing is supposed to be about maintaining order and protecting property and lives from outlaws. There are certainly risks in that model, because the definition of order is shifting and Peelian policing can involve vice laws and injustices. The new style of policing; however, is militaristic. Swat teams, no knock raids, “War on X” terminology, creates a counter insurgency mindset and model. And counter insurgency is us v them.

  12. robc

    Whycome has the fontflu returned?

    • Nephilium

      WordPress update is the usual cause.

      Or because you touch yourself.

      Take your pick.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’d rather touch myself so…..

  13. Rebel Scum

    Chinese, Iranian Hackers Targeted Biden And Trump Campaigns

    Biden will be safe as long as he follows Her Shrillness’s security methods.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      Wipe the server with a cloth?

      • AlexinCT

        Sell your soul to the CCP.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        Look fat, we keep a clean mail server around here. 40 years in the senate, we got this guy that brings our mail around. Skinny kid named Pepe. Every day, he brings the mail around, and when he’s done I tell him, “Pepe.” I say, “Pepe, go get yourself a nice hot bath. You earned it, pal.” And that’s that.

    • The Last American Hero

      Biden doesn’t know how to send emails. He’s safe.

  14. Gdragon

    Unicorns know everybody’s name 😉

    I’m not the only person here who watches that show (“Mr. In-Between”), right? The ratings suggest that there are at least a few others watching, somewhere…

    • WTF

      I really like that show.

    • R C Dean

      I couldn’t understand a word. Didn’t have subtitles I could turn on, either.

  15. Pat

    Hey Neph (or any other Ohio glibs) – I was wondering if you’ve ever ventured to Dayton. I’ve been eyeing a couple of properties in the outskirts around there and was wondering if anybody could share a first hand perspective.

    • robc

      We have at least one Daytonian glib, but I can’t remember who. Also a few in Cincy, which is basically a suburb of Dayton.

      • Jarflax

        You are now dead to me. Cincinnati is a once great city slowly dying of the blue plague. Dayton is a cowtown with an Airforce base.

      • robc

        The best parts of Cincinnati (Aquarium, Hofbrauhaus, Airport) are located in Kentucky.

        I like Cincinnati, as long as I don’t have to cross the river. Except for baseball games, I will walk across the bridge for those.

        I worked in Dayton one night, it is the only time I have been there. The next morning, between Dayton and Cincinnati is the only time I have ever fallen asleep while driving.

    • Nephilium

      I’ve been down there, but only for a couple of days. Gender Traitor, Tom Terrific (spelled wrong), and Tres Cool live closer to the area. The only suburb I know about is Yellow Springs. It’s where Dave Chappelle lives, and is a big hippie/leftie area.

      • Pat

        Gender Traitor, Tom Terrific (spelled wrong), and Tres Cool live closer to the area.

        Geez, I didn’t realize there were so many of “you people”.

        I was looking at a couple places to the north/northwest of the city, about 15-20 miles out. I think I’d probably fucking die from the humidity after this many years in the desert, but there’s some good prices on at least an acre of breathing room.

      • Nephilium

        Well GT and TT are married. There’s also AlmightyJB, Aus, Akira, Hyperbole, and a couple others I’m sure I’m forgetting that live here in Ohio.

        So up near the Troy area?

      • Pat

        Looking at the map, yeah, looks like up around that area. The one looks a little closer to Ludlow Falls, and the other looks like it’s around Tipp City just south of Troy right off 75.

      • Gender Traitor

        Hey, Pat – just saw this. Those areas are just a little ways north of us, and we’ve spent a lot of time in Tipp. Can you give me your e-dress without doxxing yourself? TT may have particular insight, given his former day job.

      • Pat

        Right on. You can use rTtsVtYpKxR5PwT3zf(at)protonmail to reach me. It’s a secondary account, so I may be remiss in checking it, but I’ll definitely see anything you send eventually. I was basically just wanting to get a feel for quality of life around there – crime, dysfunctional government, medical care, major weather events, that type of thing. I appreciate you guys taking the time.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        Annoyed Nomad ?

      • Festus

        Half of the Glib-drunk seem to be from Ohio.

      • banginglc1

        To tolerate Ohio, you have to be drunk.

      • Nephilium

        Not so much this year, with the cancellation of sports, some of the disappointment isn’t happening.

      • Agent Cooper

        I’m from Columbus.

        The best part of Dayton is the air museum. It’s awesome.

  16. Rebel Scum

    Mayor Bill de Blasio returned to a staunch defense of the NYPD on Thursday amid outcry over police officers using force to disperse peaceful protesters and Gov. Andrew Cuomo emphatically backed the response as well, days after accusing the NYPD of failing to do its job and stop looting.

    You keep using that word…I do not think it means what you think it means.

    • Old Man With Candy

      The problem is that there’s peaceful protesters and violent opportunists and the cops do not make the distinction.

      • leon

        Neither does the news media.

      • l0b0t

        Anecdotally (for what it’s worth), all of my friends who were on the scene said NYPD absolutely started the aggression in Downtown Brooklyn. NYPD was using buses and trucks to block sidestreets and herd the (at the time) peaceful marchers into a semi-enclosed area between the Hotlantic Center and the stupid boondoggle of a stadium. Once the crowd was packed and could move no further, NYPD came in swinging batons and deploying judicious amounts of pepper spray. The once peaceful crowd responded like Brooklynites are well known to do, and started burning and smashing everything in sight.

  17. Rufus the Monocled

    “In emotional remarks, Booker said he felt “so raw today,” saying, “of all days we’re doing this right now when God, if this bill passed today, what that would mean for America. That this body and that body have finally agreed.”

    Politics of emotion is all the rage. Up here they all quiver now. Trudeau, Climate Barbie, Hajdu heck even Doug Ford are always on the brink of a breakdown.

    The Idiocracy has arrived. Changed my mind.

    • Gdragon

      I’ve taken to calling Doug Ford “Angry Dad” since that pretty much describes his response to everything but it’s tricky because it also makes people think of Homer Simpson, who they generally like.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        He’s a sell-out.

        Bakes a cake with latex gloves. Moron.

      • Gdragon

        You keep saying things like that and we’re all gonna get grounded again, don’t make him do that to us

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Didn’t he do it for another 30 days?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      HOW DARE YOU ARGUE WITH ME?

      – Spartacus

      And Murkowski is obviously angling for some new role. 2024 perhaps?

    • EvilSheldon

      It is truly tiresome. You would think that a professional teleprompter reader would be able to show a little personal deportment, but apparently in 2020 even that is too much to ask.

    • Rebel Scum

      what that would mean for America.

      More unconstitutional thought-crime?

  18. Count Potato

    “More cops who need racial sensitivity training.”

    I can’t tell what happened from the video. Also, I can’t hear what is being said because they keep censoring it.

    • Rhywun

      Get with the program, everyone. The new demand is “racial equity”. Only then can we heal.

  19. juris imprudent

    I’m not Sloopy! [This is like the I am Spartacus bit, right?]

    Anyway, WaPo needs to change that line to Democracy Dies in Stupidity.

    • Toxteth O’Grady

      Miss Manners was (her kids write her column now, far less wittily) the only good thing about WaPo. Eh, also Woodward and Bernstein.

      • l0b0t

        This movie has the best take of Woodward and Bernstein. Also, Harry Shearer as G. Gordon Liddy.

  20. Count Potato

    “It’s hard to beat WaPo for sheer stupidity.”

    I turned off ad-blocker and it still won’t let me read it.

    • AlmightyJB

      Try opening link in private or incognito tab.

      • Count Potato

        Then I get a message saying private windows are only allowed for subscribers.

      • UnCivilServant

        That’s too many hoops for a WaPo article.

      • Festus

        Yeah, If I want to get lied to I can get it for free every time the cat knocks something off of the counter. No Dice!

  21. Juvenile Bluster

    I want to brag for a second that my daughter was one of 5 kids in her class to be recognized on the Gold Honor Roll for having all A’s and B’s from 1st through 5th grades.

    Now the issue will be getting her to apply herself hard enough to continue that through middle and high school. Because that was my problem when I was that age.

    • UnCivilServant

      Oh, it was the teachers who beat all motivation out of me.

      • Nephilium

        They didn’t beat it out of me (even though it was Catholic school), just drained it out of me with uninspiring work, worthless papers, and no challenges.

    • Mojeaux

      Congratulations!!!

    • AlmightyJB

      Congrats! Yeah, it’s very easy to get bored. As long as she continues to love learning, that’s the most important thing.

      • Q Continuum

        Like learning how to field dress a deer for example.

        Or run to new cover while reloading.

        Or kick the shit out of guys who get fresh with her (though that may be a few years off).

      • Jarflax

        Not as many years off in the future as using the word fresh in that context is in the past. You are officially a dirty old man.

    • gbob

      Hurrah!

    • Pat

      Man, that takes me back to when I had potential, before I decided to embark on a career as a middle aged business manqué.

      Congrats!

    • EvilSheldon

      Congrats!

    • Festus

      I fell in with a lazy crowd of “popular” kids and my marks went to shit. You need to nip that in the bud if you can. Good Luck! We’re all counting on you!

      • Gdragon

        I got kinda lucky in that regard in high school because I was in a gifted program so none of my “cool” friends at school were in my classes. So I got some standard boilerplate shit for being in that program in the first place but they knew little about what my actual grades were like (plus I wasn’t technically “competing” with them for As anyway so there were no negative feelings there either).

    • Tundra

      Congrats!

      I’ll brag, too. My daughter (senior in HS) got the ‘straight As all the way’ award for (unweighted) 4.0s from 9-12 grade.

      Smart girl.

    • Agent Cooper

      I swept the Iowa Test of Basic Skills in elementary school. Highest score every year.

      It’s been all downhill since then.

      • The Last American Hero

        You knew how to secure ethanol subsidies at that tender age?

    • Deplorableme

      Watch her friends, that’s where things go to shit. If she hangs with the smart kids, she’ll continue to do great. My oldest (just graduated HS), made valedictorian (must be Mom’s genes) and all his friends are stellar students. My daughter (Juniour, now Senior) on the other hand, awesome musician, but doesn’t care so much about applying herself much, just enough to get B’s in her non-music/band classes. She did great in grade school. Her friends, same thing.

  22. Rebel Scum

    I saw that Breeze apologized for saying something completely non-controversial. That’s unfortunate. Apparently he lacks the character that I assume his WWII veteran grandparents had.

    • AlmightyJB

      Never apologize.

  23. leon

    Morning. I don’t particularly feel in a news reading mood. Cory Booker is an enormous sick. Maybe they should add an anti-lynching anti gun confiscation law. Make it a civil rights violation to propose and gun control law.

    • AlmightyJB

      “I don’t particularly feel in a news reading mood”

      News is mostly lies and propaganda so..

  24. AlmightyJB

    We’ve always been at war with first responders.

  25. Festus

    Gah! OMWC linx? On a Friday morning? I’m never going to sleep until Monday morning, am I Toto? The wormhole beckons…

  26. Idle Hands

    I honestly can’t believe the shit that is happening. It’s so far beyond the pail. The cognitive switch to protests are bad to protests are good and we are going to march with them. To nobody not even a spouse can see a loved one dieing in a hospital or have a funeral to this funeral is acceptable and we are going to not only have it but televise it and everyone’s going to be there. It’s so fucking disgusting these people are fucking filth. Not the protesters, the preening politicians and media class needs to be dismantled and destroyed.

    • Idle Hands

      In all honesty fuck the protesters too if I was protesting and their were a sizable percentage of people using that as an opportunity to wreck, loot and try to provoke police violence and brutality pretty sure I’d fold up. I feel bad for Floyd but at least his case has seen action on unlike the countless others where the cops are let off without fanfare. What’s happening now is beyond despicable. Knew the stops would be out 2020 but didn’t realize they were capable of going this far. These gov are going out of their way to punish republican demo-graphical voters. How else do you explain no church or small business’s being allowed to be open while big box stores and chains are? This is fucking disgusting.

      • JD is in the United Karendom

        Yarp. I have a feeling this has set the tone for the rest of the year, and come the elections, there will be NG guarding polling stations as riots keep many from coming out to vote, or from reaching the polling stations. There will be all kinds of opportunistic propaganda taking advantage of the confusion, with outlets like CNN crying out that “police and NG are preventing BIPOC voters from entering polling stations!” with carefully edited clips of rioters being subdued and escorted by NG or cops. The left wing establishment (media, pols), across the board, will continue to either tacitly or openly support the violence, or refuse to condemn it. The “boog” will unfold quite

      • JD is in the United Karendom

        [Oops! Premature comment submission. I swear that never happens]

        *clears throat*

        As I was saying, the “boog” will unfold and gain momentum until it really is basically a pathetic war, fought largely between protesters and whichever branches of military/law enforcement are actually still there making some effort to maintain order. I think there will be some largely impotent 88er/alt-right incels attempting some sort of fighting, and of course the media narrative will make out that this putsch LARPing is representative of “the other side”. Meanwhile, actual red state people will be attempting to defend their homes and businesses and probably being villified for it, cast again as just bigoted rubes and Nazis in The Narrative. Unfortunately due to the incel retard element and the nature of the violence there will probably be a few more Heather Heyers needlessly losing their lives for the big stupid revolutionary theatre, and becoming martyrs for The Narrative.

      • leon

        What gets me is that people have died in these riots, but lets not thino about them. Mr CEO make sure you did mention that rioting is wrong. In a sane world you wouldn’t have to, but the taking point is out, that murder and mayhem are fine if you are just really mad.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Word.

        When I saw that funeral I was appalled.

        These are the same people who say ‘wear a mask to love one another’.

        To me? These people are morally bankrupted and deranged.

      • Overt

        “In all honesty fuck the protesters too if I was protesting and their were a sizable percentage of people using that as an opportunity to wreck, loot and try to provoke police violence and brutality pretty sure I’d fold up. ”

        What is a protester supposed to do, then? It seems disingenuous to hold a bunch of protesters responsible for the actions of others. If I’m going out to protest, and some asshole started looting, am I obligated to stop them in order for my message to be considered? This is what reactionaries do- they infiltrate large movements in order to increase their legitimacy. This is why we can’t freaking leave Afghanistan or Iraq or Kurdistan or whatever- because as soon as we find a side to ally or negotiate with, some other faction starts using violence to make themselves look more important.

        I have read too much evidence about how Antifa was stashing weapons around protests and just doing their best to turn these things violent. This comes from videos posted online, and even posts from local police departments:
        https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=3275541222490420&id=148382285206345 (Lol, bob handy…)

        I have been arguing a lot with my daughter, who sympathizes with the BLM crowd. She is extremely passionate about racism and structural white supremacy and all sorts of nonsense. She is NOT violent or a rioter. We argue about the appropriate responses to this nonsense, and about White Privilege. If I just said “Fuck you, your side is rioting”, we’d never get anywhere and it would be completely fallacious argumentation. But last night, instead, we found common ground on busting police unions, Qualified Immunity, and other reforms. This would never have been possible if she and I were just arguing about whose side is the most violent.

      • Idle Hands

        Look overt I’m venting. I’m pretty pissed that these politicians have just laid economic waste and made a ton of people I know light their money on fire and sit back and watch their business’s take a hit and threaten those people with arrest and pulling their licenses only fully embrace and march with these people they care nothing about for a photoop. And these people don’t seem to understand that they are being used so utterly and completely. I mostly agree 100% with your position. I just can’t stand what’s happening and the looting makes me absolutely sick. Along with the people justifying the looting and violence which just reeks of George Wallace like racism. I truly feel bad for the people honestly and openly protesting the cops I get it I truly do it’s just everything else that is horrifying and disgusting to me. Also there is not even remotely a right wing movement like this that is embraced on the right like antifa is, really BLM platform is probably the equivalent of something you’d see on a right wing reactionary website which are constantly condemned by the republican party. The double standard is so apparent I don’t even know what to say to people who go to the pox on both their houses argument anymore. What’s scary to me is only one side is held to any standard of acting decently in their protests, I’d have no problem with BLM and the left marching with guns and militia men and peacefully keeping the antifa fucktards in line but that doesn’t seem to happen. With few exceptions property damage and looting occurs with the left than anything on the right. They have Charlottesville to point at that’s it.

      • Rhywun

        peacefully keeping the antifa fucktards in line

        BLM and Antifa share the same goals. They have no interest in “keeping them in line”.

      • Overt

        “BLM and Antifa share the same goals.”

        I would say that they have some overlap in the ven diagram, but I don’t think it is fair to mark them equivalent. BLM’s was created to reform police departments and address the disparity of black people being killed by cops. Antifa has two purposes explicit in its platform- stopping fascism and overthrowing capitalism.

        This is complicated by the fact that BLM is a member of the “Movement for Black Lives” (M4BL) that is explicitly anti capitalist. In fact there were bunches of marxist and socialist articles back ~2015 talking about how BLM was problematic because it and Obama were giving liberals false hope that they could get “Justice” within the system. There was significant push to get them to join the anti-cap movement, and it is noteworthy that while they afiliate with M4BL, they did not adopt that platform.

        All of this inside baseball is a distraction though. Whether they are BLM or not, there is a shit ton of people- especially black people- who want to reform the police. And in this specific case, the last thing Antifa wants is for those black people to see that people on the right will work with them. Antifa very specifically does NOT want their peaceful protests to work. They want those people to decide that their only option is to get violent.

      • WTF

        . BLM’s was created to reform police departments and address the disparity of black people being killed by cops.

        BLM is based on a false premise, there is no racial disparity to being killed by cops.

      • Overt

        I agree with you, but that is on these leaders. I totally disagree with half the shit that BLM says or does. But the vast majority of people in BLM are acting peacefully, and I respect that right. And there are tons of videos of BLM people and other organizers trying their best to keep the Antifa people in line. Yeah, if they would just come armed, then they might be able to stop it. But I’m not going to hold a person responsible for failing to be the police at their demonstration.

        I think one of the most frustrating things for me has been how absolutely unacceptable nuance has become in this polarized climate. If I do anything short of advocating the “dismantling of white supremacy systems” within my company, I will be accused of supporting white supremacists. This makes it impossible to have any conversations, and makes me think that I am forever trapped in a bubble of marxist totalitarians who hate me for my skin color.

        I can only recommend trying to get someone you can talk with constructively. It is extremely therapeutic to know that there is someone on the other side of this who can discuss it.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        This makes it impossible to have any conversations, and makes me think that I am forever trapped in a bubble of marxist totalitarians who hate me for my skin color.

        This is how workplace shootings happen. You get a whole bunch of people who feel like they have to walk on eggshells at work, force them into indoctrination sessions that tell them they are shit, and then start cutting their salary and benefits when the company is struggling. That’s how you make a person feel trapped. Trapped people lash out with violence, just like a raccoon in a havahart cage.

      • Akira

        This is how workplace shootings happen.

        And of course, when it does happen, it will just be further evidence that systemic racism is everywhere and the company needs to implement affirmative action and force wypipo to participate in struggle sessions (and of course, that we need to end the Second Amendment, as usual).

      • Jarflax

        Unpopular take: Marching around chanting stupid rhymes doesn’t accomplish crap. Change comes, if at all, as a result of emotional changes in the public as a whole. Occasionally an orator can spark this, but usually it is an image of someone on the other side doing something awful, or people on your side behaving well. The Civil Rights movement owes a huge debt to Bull Conner because the images of dogs and water cannon being used against well dressed peaceful black people did more than any other event to change people’s emotional view of the issue. Ditto Wallace in the doorway.

        Stonewall didn’t get laws against homosexuality overturned, nor did ACT UP. It was perfectly nice and decent gay men and women becoming more visible (so yes, evil as I think they were, the ‘outing’ movement types were effective), which forced the rest of us to recognize that gay didn’t equal disgusting pervert, and changed the emotional tone of that issue from “Legalize perversion” to “Stop persecuting people for who they love.”

      • Idle Hands

        this.

      • Hyperion

        The left have been doing awful stuff for years, right in the site of the public, and I see any blowback at all yet.

        They’ve been trying to take people’s guns, they’ve been trying to kill free speech, they’ve come up with and publicly voiced the most insane anti-capitalist, anti-American rhetoric imaginable, they want perverted men using the bathroom with little girls, they want to legalize pedophilia, they locked down the economy and did unimaginable economic damage, destroying the economy and lives, now they have their brownshirts in the streets, rioting, burning, and looting, while their media cheers it on.

        WTF does it take to get blowback for that shit? They have to start burning the suburbs and murdering people in the streets in broad daylight, while our fearless leaders to jackshit about it?

        What the fuck does it take?

      • Jarflax

        Dude what the hell do you think created Trump? Created the concealed carry movement? Do you remember back to the 80s? Where in most States you had to be specifically licensed, ie. friends with the sheriff or DA, to carry a gun?

      • Festus

        Karen can’t get a latte.

    • leon

      That’s one that kicks me in the gut. These bastards were so cruelly heartless they’d let people die alone and refuse their families a funeral, but now they want to tell you how much they care about people and their pain. Fuck you Pol, go eat a stick of dynamite.

      • EvilSheldon

        There’s just nothing more fun than degrading your class enemies.

    • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

      the pail

      the latest towing the lion? I make what I call leftbrain/rightbrain mistakes: the wrong center at the wheel steers poorly even though I know how to drive perfectly well.

      Anyways, if ye did nay know: the Pale

      signed,

      your friendly but guilty because of 500 years of DNA Scots Irish buddy

  27. Pat

    Twitter accuses President Trump of making ‘false claims’

    Twitter has accused the US president of making false claims, in one of the app’s own articles covering the news.

    The move – which effectively accuses the leader of lying – refers to a tweet by Donald Trump about his first defence secretary.

    Mr Trump had tweeted that he had given James Mattis the nickname “Mad Dog” and later fired him.

    But Twitter’s article says that the former general resigned, and his nickname preceded Trump’s presidency.

    It follows last week’s explosive confrontation, which saw Twitter fact-check two of President Trump’s tweets and label another as glorifying violence.

    • JD is in the United Karendom

      Well we wouldn’t want to be glorifying violence now, would we? That would be most egregious.

    • Idle Hands

      we are two months away from anyone remotely sounding conservative is deplatformed. They are pulling out all the stops. Personally I thought this was a tinfoil hat conspiracy when people I listen to whined and said this was coming but after the past two months it apparent they don’t care how heavy handed and blantent it is. In fact the more power the showcase the more people might toe the line and be demoralized.

      • Q Continuum

        I don’t really think this moves the needle that much. People who already hate Trump will continue to hate Trump, and people who love him will continue to love him. Whatever tiny percentage of voters are still persuadable at this point are not going to tip because of some lame “fact-checking” like this. I think Twitter’s way too transparent at this point for it to make much difference. I could easily be wrong though.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s their stupid fucking Trust and Safety Council or whatever they call it that’s the root of their problem.

        Twitter can’t go bankrupt fast enough.

      • Overt

        Trump just needs to move to Gab now. Just go, Trump. It will give people time to move.

      • grrizzly

        You cannot get the Gab app in the Google app store. Many people won’t be able to follow Trump if it requires sideloading a third-party app on their phones.

      • kbolino

        The mob (of users, of employees, of investors, of the C-suite’s social circles) demanded Twitter “do something”. This is the something they’ve done (so far). The ones demanding this are a bunch of Roperites who think this will never be turned around on them.

      • Agent Cooper

        Twitter is wrassling with the Pig and the Pig loves it.

      • R C Dean

        Twitter is helping Trump build his case to strip them of immunity.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      What are the odds the U.S. government shuts down Twitter?

      Dorsey is far worse than Trump.

      • Count Potato

        “What are the odds the U.S. government shuts down Twitter?”

        Zero.

    • Rebel Scum

      Twitter has accused the US president of making false claims

      No one does that on Twatter.

      label another as glorifying violence.

      It literally did the opposite.

  28. JD is in the United Karendom

    Don’t trust weather. Weather is asshole. It changes roughly every 5-10 minutes from drizzling rain clouds to bright sunshine and back again. If it’s going to rain, it ought not to be a tease and just chuck it down hard. Farmers be pumping from the reservoir to irrigate, yo.

    • Festus

      It’s June here and the temp hasn’t risen above 18C yet. We’re in the temperate part of the country.

  29. Rebel Scum

    Fredo Cuomo: “Show me where is says that protests have to be polite.”

    Hm…

    “…the right of the people to peaceably assemble to petition the government for a redress of grievances…” – 1A

    • Rhywun

      That old thing? Pfft.

    • bacon-magic

      He’s not very good at reading the Constitution or the BOR.

      • BakedPenguin

        Wut? He’s smaht! It’s not like they think! Like he’s dumb! He can do things…

  30. Rebel Scum

    Yeah, sure.

    On Thursday, Twitter removed a video tribute to George Floyd posted by President Donald Trump’s reelection campaign, claiming the video violated the social media platform’s policy on copyrighted material.

    “We are working toward a more just society, but that means building up, not tearing down. Joining hands, not hurling fists. Standing in solidarity, not surrendering to hostility,” the Trump campaign tweeted with the video.

    Having watched the video I am going to assume it was removed because it is a boss campaign commercial that Dems cannot effectively counter.

    • leon

      SLD about campaign finance and shit. Twitter is playing a dangerous game with this. I don’t know the intricacies of the laws, but they might be in violation.

      • Q Continuum

        Doesn’t matter, BadOrangeMan must be stopped at any cost. And beside, they’ll probably get some judge that’s sympathetic and either dismiss or give them a slap on the wrist. Twitter’s part of the DNC propaganda arm, just aimed at yootz whereas network news is the part aimed at grayhairs.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      They’re headed straight for a lawsuit on that one.

  31. Count Potato

    “Two Buffalo police officers are suspended for shoving a 75-year-old man who cracked his head on the sidewalk and is in hospital in a serious condition – as Gov. Cuomo blasts their ‘utterly disgraceful’ actions”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8390857/Two-Buffalo-police-officers-suspended-video-shows-shoving-elderly-man-ground.html

    This isn’t good.

    It’s as though we have “opposite cops” who attack peaceful people, but allow violent crime.

    • Pat

      It’s as though we have “opposite cops” who attack peaceful people, but allow violent crime.

      Bullies generally tend to pick on people who can’t or won’t fight back.

    • AlexinCT

      It’s as though we have “opposite cops” who attack peaceful people, but allow violent crime.

      No as if, man. VIolent people will react violently, so you prey on the weak. Same reason the SJW types attack Christians or falsely accused domestic right wing terror groups that have no actual ability to do any violence, and then claim they are being brave and standing up to them, but stay quiet or even defend Islamic terror or these rioters & looters. We have decided to burn Rome and play the harp when it is happening.

  32. juris imprudent

    Army acquisition – Einstein’s definition of insanity in action.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Maybe we can just purchase Russian equipment, it’d be a lot cheaper.

    • Drake

      Why do they need to replace the Bradley? Maybe upgrade the missile system eventually, but why the whole thing? And they already have the Stryker as a lighter alternative.

      • AlexinCT

        Some company needs a handout…

      • Drake

        Sure. Used to be that Ford and Chrysler built our tanks and APCs because they could turn them out cheap. Now it’s General Dynamics and their ilk – because they can make them real expensive.

      • leon

        We don’t want to give our boys cheap shit! They need the best, most expensive shit.

      • Jarflax

        Also, why do we have to constantly create new jargon for things that have perfectly good names already? Call a light tank a tank damn it, if it has wheels not tracks call it an armored car.

  33. Mojeaux

    My big plan this morning was to mow the back yard while it was still cool. Alas, the rain was not in my plans and now my fingers are sticking to my keyboard keys because humidity.

    • Idle Hands

      She sucks but notice what the daily mail states as controversial:

      “Owens is frequently in the news for her controversial views; she has described liberals as ‘trolls’ and called Meghan Markle ‘a witch'”

      lmao.

      • Idle Hands

        pretty sure she’s said far dumber and far more untrue lies.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Floyd wasn’t a model citizen and it was absolutely wrong to murder him. It is actually possible to hold those two thoughts at the same time although Pence ought to pick less of a bombthrower.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I don’t think Pence is that clued in.

      • Q Continuum

        That’s the worst thing about this entire clusterfuck: everything is black and white (no pun intended). The world doesn’t work like that. It’s also possible to acknowledge that what happened to Floyd was 100% wrong and condemn riots and property destruction; as well as understand that there are cops who are decent human beings but also be extremely skeptical of state power in general.

        Everything must be reduced to a very childish and unsophisticated “ME GOOD, YOU BAD” mentality.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        See the Rand Paul / Spartacus row for a perfect example.

      • Idle Hands

        well it’s an election year. Nuance isn’t allowed.

      • Rebel Scum

        Critical thinking isn’t taught anymore.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        No, it is not. It is actively discouraged unless it’s in one particular direction.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        I knew someone fairly apolitical who interviewed there. Evidently he wouldn’t have fit in.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Dammit, that was meant to be a reply to Pie re Rockstar.

      • mindyourbusiness

        It no longer matters. Now we have something better – THE NARRATIVE!

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        It’s like the nation is trapped in a miasma of blundered lunacy and hysteria. Thanks curfew (which is an oversimplification but I think it contributed mightily).

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        *cough* WEIMAR *cough*

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        you’re right, of course

        I put it the other way: everything is black and white. But maybe I’m wrong: maybe that’s not a good way to sell my ideas. It’s true that the world doesn’t work like that, but B&W is 90% right 90% of the time . . . and in most of the cases anyone is discussing. I would argue that the lost appeal of first principles is one of the most devastating wounds to western culture in the past half century: no one seems to talk in these terms any more. So we’re left with
        * weasel words
        * nihilism
        * relativism
        * identity politics
        Civil rights and property are childishly easy notions to discuss, but the discourse has come untethered from a meaningful argot. It’s like those midnight dorm arguments with the guy who never took Intro to Western Civ.

      • leon

        “but B&W is 90% right 90% of the time . . ”

        Still falls short of my record.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Thank you

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Might I borrow some of that for a Derpbook rant?

      • Drake

        She is right – he was convicted in an armed home invasion – but bad taste to speak of the dead that way.

      • Plisade

        “…it’s judgment that defeats us.”

    • Rebel Scum

      Miss Red Pill Black has often done and said some pretty awful things.

      Ill-timed, perhaps, but not incorrect. Also, despite him having a bad history, it didn’t warrant the killing while detained (obviously). I heard he held a gun to a pregnant (black) woman’s stomach as his pals ransacked her home. That’s bad and he served time for it.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        He was convicted for a home invasion in that instance I think.

  34. leon

    Have you noticed that it’s brave to fact check inane things like ” Trump didn’t give Mattis a nickname” but things like “Assad didn’t gas his own people” makes you a kook.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I bet he has a nickname now.

      • juris imprudent

        Bad Dog!

      • straffinrun

        +1 Woof

    • Pat

      “Epstein didn’t kill himself”

      • ChipsnSalsa

        Who?

      • AlexinCT

        The guy that had video of Bill Clinton fucking little kids and Hillary making Chelsea with her dad: Janet Reno….

      • R C Dean

        There’s a “You Know Who Else Didn’t Kill Himself” joke in there somewhere.

  35. gbob

    Regarding the Buffalo cops, I was pretty surprised. The city was really quiet, protest wise. I picked up a friend from a very…ethnic….neighborhood in the evening. I was more alert for trouble than normal, but most folks were doing what we do here. Sitting on their porches, playing tunes, and drinking with friends. The ONLY protesting that day was a very small group, almost all white. (The black community spent the afternoon holding meetings at local churches). Earlier that day our mayor had prayed with the group. At around 5 or so, the police were given the order to disperse the protesters.

    Seems to me the issue wasn’t the two officers, but the older in the first place.

    Then again, the mayor has his race to his advantage, so the cops are fucked. I dont feel bad for the officers as much as disappointed in where we point fingers.

    • Overt

      Yeah that’s a pitty. I am in Buffalo a lot for work, and I really hope the city can collectively keep it together. I really like the town. (In the 3 months of good weather.)

    • Hyperion

      Amazingly enough, It’s completely quiet in Balmer. At least as far as I can tell, I haven’t went into the city in months, working from home every day. But the reason, I’m guessing, is Republican governor sent in the national guard. I guess the feds asked the blackface VA gov to send troops to DC and he refused, then Hogan sent the ones from MD.

  36. Festus

    Somewhat surprised that your musical link wasn’t this in these trying times… https://youtu.be/ed2q_b5rhvo He is the Birthday Boy and did chant “Get the Nigger!” Seems apropos.

    • UnCivilServant

      I need your editorials like I need a hole in the head.

      If #4 had a face…

    • Pat

      23 could call me from the bathroom
      29 could borrow my dad’s oversized pleated 90s dress slacks
      I would destroy 37 at Mario Kart and then relentlessly trash talk her because I ain’t no simp

  37. Rebel Scum

    I suppose the positive is that FL anti-gunners recognize the need for an amendment to get what they want (even though it would make the state constitution not conform to the federal constitution in an area, where by the wording, the federal constitution is clearly superior).

    The Florida Supreme Court ruled Thursday that a proposed constitutional amendment seeking to ban possession of assault-style weapons does not meet requirements to go before voters.

    […]

    The Supreme Court plays a key role in the ballot-initiative process. It reviews initiatives to determine whether ballot titles and summaries — the wording that voters would see at polling places — meet legal requirements. It does not decide on the merits of the initiatives.

    Thursday’s 4-1 decision focused on part of the ballot summary that said the initiative “exempts and requires registration of assault weapons lawfully possessed prior to this provision’s effective date.”

    The court majority, made up of Chief Justice Charles Canady and justices Ricky Polston, Alan Lawson and Carlos Muniz, said that provision “affirmatively misleads voters regarding the exemption” because of a contradiction with the broader text of the proposed constitutional amendment.

    The contradiction involves whether the exemption would apply to weapons or to the people who possess the weapons. The distinction could be important, for instance, if a gun owner dies.

    “Specifically, the next to last sentence of the ballot summary informs voters that the initiative ‘exempts and requires registration of assault weapons lawfully possessed prior to this provision’s effective date’ … when in fact the initiative does no such thing,” the majority opinion said. “Contrary to the ballot summary, the initiative’s text exempts only ‘the person’s,’ meaning the current owner’s, possession of that assault weapon.”

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Ah, so it’s an amendment with ambiguous by design wording. They ruled correctly it looks like.

      • Rebel Scum

        It’s like the anti-freedom people wish to ban private ownership of all firearms. (see recent bills in VA for clarification.)

    • Q Continuum

      Odd how it’s not completely concentrated in urban cities with large black populations…

      Maybe, now bear with me, just maybe it’s not about race and about state abuse of power in general. Might just be crazy enough to be true!

      • Pat

        Let it be known that Q Contiuum is a racisty racist who personally endorses the wanton slaughter of every black man, woman and child in America.

      • Chipwooder

        And uses their blood to bake his matzo!

        Might as well go full retard with one of the classics.

      • kbolino

        Don’t worry, besides pushing the race narrative hard, they also slip in a hint that it’s the loose gun laws causing it.

      • Q Continuum

        Well obvi. Common sense gun confiscation is needed or else a vengeful deity will pummel Earth with asteroids.

    • straffinrun

      That’s wild. North Dakota not a single one.

  38. leon

    If Iran wants Biden that might put a damper on the Neo-Con Biden love story.

  39. Pat

    Rockstar temporarily closes online games in support of Black Lives Matter

    Rockstar Games will shut down access to Grand Theft Auto Online and Red Dead Online from 2-4 PM ET today “to honor the legacy of George Floyd.” Anti-racism and anti-police brutality protests have taken place across the world after Floyd died on May 25th. Four former Minneapolis police officers have been charged in connection with Floyd’s death.

    Following the memorial, we hope you will join us in further honoring the many victims of America’s racial injustices by supporting their families, black-owned businesses, those marching on the streets, and coalitions through the organizations listed here: https://t.co/yIQu2R1pJb
    — Rockstar Games (@RockstarGames) June 4, 2020

    Good look for a company that publishes a game the entire premise of which is black men committing organized crime and calling each other nigga.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Why not let people choose to participate or not by their own decision? Isn’t that a paid service?

    • Chipwooder

      The events of the past week make me want to never spend money on anything but food, water, and ammunition ever again. I don’t want to reward any of these clowns.

      • Drake

        I was just thinking about how the few things in stores you know aren’t made in China are guns and ammo – and how that’s where I plan to most of my disposable income for the foreseeable future.

      • UnCivilServant

        Funny thing is the drain pan I expected to show up with a made in china marker was actually made in the USA.

        I didn’t know there were any factories left in this country.

      • Drake

        There are a couple of places around here that do injection molding and plastic printing. I think it’s so cheap now it’s not worth offshoring.

      • Akira

        There are a lot of auto parts plants around here as well as a ton of smaller factories that do contract manufacturing for them. The business mostly relies on a few Honda plants around here – ironic since those are considered “foreign” cars even though the final assembly and many lower tiers of assembly are done in the US, probably more than can be said for American car companies these days.

        I worked at a one of these factories that made parts for Honda, and this dude actually said to me that he wouldn’t drive a car that wasn’t made in America (as we were literally making parts for Honda right then and there).

  40. LJW

    “It’s hard to beat WaPo for sheer stupidity.”

    Funny how the WaPo and NYT are two of the biggest adversaries of the first amendment.

    • Rebel Scum

      Democracy dies in, um, something.

      • R C Dean

        “Democracy Dies in D.C.”

  41. RAHeinlein

    JOBS NUMBERS – 2.5M added in May!

    • robc

      That is fun in a “statistics without context” way.

      • leon

        Maybe Trump will parrot it like the Obama sycophants parroted “Obama did the most to cut the deficit”

      • robc

        Jackson*, Ike, and Clinton(nearly) eliminated the deficit. So, yeah, that was always dumb.

        *He practically eliminated the DEBT. He was a horrible person, but he did two great things…he nearly eliminated the debt and he killed the 2nd Bank of the USA.

      • Fatty Bolger

        This is what the economist I linked the other day was warning Democrats about. Just getting back to mostly normal will mean record breaking economic numbers being posted in the lead up to the election.

        That aside, this seems like legitimately positive news.

      • RAHeinlein

        Consensus was ~8 M job loss and unemployment of ~20%; instead, 2.5 M jobs added and unemployment decline to 13.3%.

      • Q Continuum

        Chocolate ration was also increased.

    • Idle Hands

      Some good news.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        If you believe it.

  42. UnCivilServant

    *Joins Webex*

    *Hits ‘Call Me’ button*

    *Is startled when phone rings*

    I’m not ready for work today.

    • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

      waiting on Teams for a training session on some marginally helpful application

      what I need are RFQ in the old inbox

      I need some old school problems: a big pile of them

    • Overt

      *Logs in*
      *Loads up Slack*
      *Looks in org slack channel*

      Manager: Anyone who would like to volunteer or has ideas for eliminating systems of white supremacy in this company, please send me a private message.

      *why do I work here. And why am I not allowed to short our stock?*

      • UnCivilServant

        “We fire HR, the Diversity office, and anyone who can assert that there are ‘systems of white supremacy’ in our company without laughing their asses off. Problem solved.”

      • R C Dean

        Since I gather white supremacy is an innate trait of white people, passed down in their blood, the only way to eliminate it from the company is to fire all the white people.

        Maybe keep mixed race people on as partial FTEs according to their blood quantum.

      • leon

        I wouldn’t be surprised if some manager inadvertently fell a foul of the byzantine discrimination/harassment laws we have with all this signaling.

  43. straffinrun

    Kneeling wasn’t bad enough. Now they are shaving their heads? What’s next?

    *Popcorn time*

      • leon

        “#GoBaldForBLM”

        Now the Nazis are gonna be pissed. Thats appropriating Skinhead culture.

      • Chipwooder

        Which was appropriated from Jamaicans in the first place

      • leon

        It’s illogical appropriations all the way down.

      • Nephilium

        SHARP lives matter?

      • Chipwooder

        My interactions with them back in the ’90s almost made me sympathetic to the Nazi skins – “We’re fighting Nazis by being just as much of assholes as they are!”

      • Festus

        I refuse to watch that stuff the same way that I prefer not to watch animal suffering videos.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Well that apology doesn’t help you wife and daughter now does it?

        Maybe they can start a Sinead O’Conner cover band?

    • Chipwooder

      Flavor Ade?

      • Festus

        Yes. Please!

      • Rebel Scum

        Where I come from it’s ‘purple drank’. //jk

    • Rebel Scum

      Now they are shaving their heads?

      Skinheads are joining BLM?

      • Festus

        Bad mistake! Now everyone will see the 666 tattoo!

      • straffinrun

        Looks like a 4 chan troll job brilliantly done.

    • UnCivilServant

      Fuck it, I’m joining the Cavaliers.

      • Agent Cooper

        They could use the help. Matthew Dellavedova can’t win the games by himself.

  44. leon

    Yesterday one of you mentioned Les Miserables yesterday, and now i’ve been listening to the brodway production. Geeze that’s such a good story.

    • Pat

      Just don’t end up like George

    • Florida Man

      If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime. Jean should have starved instead of stealing bread.

      • Festus

        I loathe Broadway. There! I said it! What a weight off my chest!

      • blackjack

        +1 I saw one of the highest end versions of the Miserable play, at a beautiful Victorian Theater in London. It flat out sucked balls. It was a huge display of fucking MISERY! I’m not even interested in trying any other plays, it sucked so bad. Very difficult to follow, as well. Theater was great, though, so there’s that.

      • leon

        It’s a story of Justice, Mercy, Law and Redemption. Try not to harden your heart so much to miss out on the beauty of the story being told.

        FWIW Jean did do the time.

      • Florida Man

        I’m just stirring the pot and ribbing the law & order types.

      • leon

        OOF. Sorry i don’t know why i didn’t see that.

        :slinks away in shame:

    • Fatty Bolger

      Yes, it is. Like Festus I loathe Broadway, but the movie with Liam Neeson (Jean Valjean) and Geoffrey Rush (Javert) is very good.

      • Florida Man

        I think you mean russel Crow and huge jack-man.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Fuck no. You couldn’t force me to watch that shit.

      • Fatty Bolger

        I mean pay me. LOL.

      • kbolino

        I realize I am a bit tone-deaf but I’m not sure anything in that movie qualified as singing.

      • Drake

        I liked the movie in which Neeson was killing guys with his snow plow.

      • Chipwooder

        I liked the one where Neeson was lost in Alaska with a bunch of other guys and they were being eaten by wolves.

      • Agent Cooper

        I liked the one where Neeson was lost in Alaska with a bunch of other guys and they were being eaten by wolves.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        +1 set of skills

      • Idle Hands

        I too enjoyed that was surprisingly good. Honestly Nieson makes a good badass. Kind of reminds me of Bronson where no matter how old or terrible the film is I can buy him laying waste to people

      • The Last American Hero

        Meh, Ray Park could kick his ass.

  45. Tundra

    Good morning, Old Man!

    Thanks for pinch hitting on this gorgeous Minnesota morning.

    You are lucky that little Libby didn’t mace you!

    Poor Rand. It is a thankless job to try to maintain a semblance of principled opposition in the land of retards and criminals.

    Very nice Old Guy Music this morning! The gal is a perfect accompaniment. You have some interesting friends – too bad this bullshit must be killing them financially.

    I was listening to your pal Foucault last night. I was supposed to see him back in March at a small venue that I hope hasn’t burned down. Still pissed about missing that one.

    Anyway, enjoy the heat and let’s all go out there and give ’em hell today!

    • Festus

      Sorry to hear about the insanity in the Twin Cities. Up here has been BAU except for the health authorities strangling small businesses. Nobody cares, no one wears a mask and nobody riots for fun and profit. We just do that when our Hockey teams lose.

    • Old Man With Candy

      As soon as his lockdown is past, we’ll be bringing Statz down here for a show. Perfect opportunity for you to snub us again.

      John is a very sincere Prog, but a good dude. The last time he played a house concert, we had a highly libertarian and conservative crowd over, including bacon and Swiss (the sandwich act). Poor guy didn’t know what hit him.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      From what I saw in another Twitter thread involving that guy he’s either been disowned by the left or he’s about to be. It’s really a feeding frenzy right now.

      • Chipwooder

        They are showing the kind of message discipline on this that would impress even Stalin himself.

  46. Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

    Unknown Hinson Stuart Baker June 3 at 3:08 AM · Public My dear friends,Unfortunately I don’t think I’ll be playing anymore Shows. My hands are absolutely shot with Osteoarthritis. I love you all and I am grateful to you for supporting me for 50 plus years. God bless you, -Stuart Baker/Unknown Hinson

    it’s silly, but it’s fun

    • The Other Kevin

      That’s sad. A friend of mine introduced me to his music not too long ago. We still make jokes on FB about our wormans givin’ us lip.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        a great concert: go to a dive to watch him, basically your old-school drunk campfire singalong

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The Squidbillies fellow? That’s a shame, the guy could play.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?
  47. Fourscore

    Some Mpls people are learning that burning down grocery stores leads to shopping inconveniences. Video at 11. Old burned out buildings will be replaced with secure concrete
    structures with no 2nd floor cheap apartments. Unintended results. Surprise, surprise.

    • Festus

      Who will build up in North Minny except for Dollar General and Check Cashola? They complained about their “food deserts” and now they get their just desserts. You burned it, you bought it. Morans.

    • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

      that’s the best-case

      my guess: massive reinvestment program with all kinds of subsidized rents

      which none of us would qualify for

      but all of us will be taxed to build

      and which will require bulldozing after 20 years of marginal impact and turning into a flaming shithole

      • Festus

        Who knew that Detroit would become “The Shining City on the Hill”… I never saw this coming but I’m not quite as cynical as some on this board. I’m gutted. It’ll get better, right? Please tell me a happy bed-time story.

      • Florida Man

        Somebody told me Detroit has actually gotten much better. I was there 03-04 for the auto show and it was terrible. I haven’t been back to confirm if it’s improved.

      • Chipwooder

        I’ve heard that, too, and I am rather skeptical. Last time I was there was 2010 and it was an enormous shithole. It looked like a hurricane was coming, there were so many boarded-up windows on the drive from the airport.

      • Nephilium

        I was there in 2016. There were a couple of gentrified neighborhoods, and a lot of shitholes.

      • hoof_in_mouth

        It is better, way better than the mid 90’s when I expedited parts in the area, but it is better because it actually collapsed so there was nothing left that could sustain the bad. The neighborhoods literally burned out and just filled in the lots so the population density dropped below a level that could sustain crime, and the govt subsidized poverty palaces were torn down. There is/was a lot of genuine post-industrial recovery but the flashy stuff is only that few blocks of downtown.

      • The Last American Hero

        It is better. But better isn’t close to good. It’s gone from nightmarish hellhole to “civilized people have reclaimed 2 sq miles of city and made it habitable”.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        The Memphis answer was to reclaim downtown
        a/ bulldoze housing projects
        b/ whose denizens flee to working class suburb
        c/ which promptly becomes the shithole that downtown was
        d/ watch 100 pound girls walk dogs downtown at 2am without a care in the world

        In a bizarre way, it’s correct: For ye have the poor with you always, but you don’t hafta let them shit on the downtown sidewalks.

        I’m not sure who to credit, but things here are drastically better than they were in Jimbo’s day: he wouldn’t recognize it.

      • R C Dean

        “you don’t hafta let them shit on the downtown sidewalks”

        Sounds like they are shitting on the suburban sidewalks now. Not sure that’s a win.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        Stipulated

        For ye have the poor with you always: What I was implying all along was they will always be shitting on someone’s sidewalk somewhere.

        It’s a win for a shitlord like me who got his downtown and midtown back, a loss for the retirees and all the hard-working decent people in that neighborhood. I never attached any virtue to the new shit distribution; it’s simply that my ox is no longer being gored. things here are drastically better was all about my selfish here.

  48. Pat

    Coronavirus: NHS contact-tracing app in place by end of month, says minister

    A new NHS coronavirus contact-tracing app should be in place by the end of the month, a minister has said.

    Business minister Nadhim Zahawi said the app – which was trialled in the Isle of Wight – will “be running as soon as we think it is robust”.

    Last week new test and trace systems were launched in England and Scotland – but without the app due to delays.

    The Guardian reported an NHS boss said the wider scheme would be imperfect at first but “world-class” by the autumn.

    The paper said the chief operating officer of the test and trace scheme said the scheme should be fully working by September or October.

    • Fatty Bolger

      “scheme” certainly seems appropriate. I wonder what they’ll use it for?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        The “acceptable” uses will spread as quickly as the virus.

      • Festus

        “My little scheme of walking up and down the square!”

    • Tundra

      Lol.

      Burner flip phone it is!

      They will wonder why so many people never leave home!

    • Festus

      Right before bed-time, too. You Cunte.

      • straffinrun

        Sweet dreams, Festus.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      NSFA (Not Suitable For Anywhere) please.

    • Q Continuum

      Male or Female?

      • Pat

        Probably.

    • Pope Jimbo

      My precioussss…..

    • Agent Cooper

      Worst. Jam. Band. Ever.

    • AlexinCT

      That fucking pic is a violation of the Geneva Convention, yo!

    • Aloysious

      I was eating.

      Was.

  49. Rebel Scum

    *rolls eyes*

    “It’s clear that if you’re Muslim, if you’re black, if you’re Latina, if you’re Indigenous, the United States is not a safe country,” alleged May, the Member of Parliament for Saanich—Gulf Islands in British Columbia.

    “Our safe country agreement with the United States… simply can’t stand anymore,” she insisted.

    “We need to change that status so that people seeking refugee protections in Canada can get here. So I once again call on the prime minister and the minister of immigration and the minister of foreign affairs to explain that under the circumstances in this pandemic, as long as people who come across our border meet our Covid-19 public safety rules, we must not turn them away — because Donald Trump has made the United States no longer safe,” she demanded.

    • Pat

      Time for the ‘murica boatlift?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Funny how they manage to shoehorn literally everything that happens into a justification for their desired policies. I bet it’s also a good justification for increased planned parenthood funding because why not.

      • The Other Kevin

        Let’s not forget increased funding for public schools!

    • Florida Man

      Here’s the problem, nobody wants to live in Canada.

    • Q Continuum

      Golly gee willikers, that explains the deluge of PoC fleeing the US.

    • leon

      because Donald Trump has made the United States no longer safe,

      Not only is the United States a hive of Racisim, but Trump caused it to be so.

    • gbob

      Remember the diverse paradise we lived for all of our history until 3 and a half years ago when the orange tyrant took power and built concentration camps? Man, if only we could find a black community organizer from a big city like Chicago to heal our wounds.

      • leon

        Bah, That’s not enough. That’s why the Dems have nominated the King Blackness himself to the candidacy.

      • Hyperion

        All that is needed is a bitter old white woman who’s 1/64th native american for VP and then they will bring harmony and justice to the entire planet.

      • Festus

        That will heal the Nation. My English Granny, arms and legs akimbo freaking out about a broken teacup. Sure. A swat across the back of the head will cure what ails us!

    • Drake

      So you’re saying “white” countries should stop letting black and brown people from entering “for their own good”?

      • Rebel Scum

        *Richard Spencer nods in agreement*

    • Chipwooder

      It’s so unsafe that many thousands of black, Muslim, and Latin people from around the world are demanding to be allowed to move here.

    • Hyperion

      Well, add to that, 5 out of 4 wiminz are raped on college campuses. Shut down all the campuses and build a wall to keep people out, for their own good!

  50. Pope Jimbo

    Again, Minnesoda is way ahead of the curve.(TW Powerline) You think passing a lynching bill during a panic is cool? Get a hold of our governor and his plans to ram shit through….

    In a press conference yesterday, he put it to the state Senate Republicans who hold the narrow majority and represent the only resistance to the radical agenda. This was Walz’s thinly veiled ultimatum in advance of the convening of the legislature next week: “I’m not sure there’s anywhere else in the country [where] their [sic] legislature is coming back next week. So you’re gonna get to see an opportunity next week how serious people are about getting this done. Because I will guarantee you, there will be bills put on the floor and put to a vote: Yes or no. Put your money where your mouth is and send it forward.”

    The Pioneer Press’s Dave Orrick translated Walz: “Attempting to leverage an uncommonly visible bully pulpit and channel widespread outcry for police and racial justice reform in the wake of George Floyd’s death,…Walz Wednesday fired a shot across the bows of state Senate Republicans, suggesting they’re the only group in the state standing in way of morally compelling change… To be clear, Walz, a Democrat, never uttered the word ‘Republican’ or mentioned any lawmaker by name.”

    • Tundra

      Why the TW? Those guys are the only ones in our world even trying to do journalism.

      Also, this was infuriting.

      Walz is a cunt. I’ll be very disappointed if the lawsuits don’t start flying and the churches start filling.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Mirengoff is completely unreadable and they are all cop suckers.

        I agree that they were great on Coronavirus, but they’ve been veering closer and closer to defending cops no matter what happens.

        I check out their site every day because they have interesting takes on our city, but they still have huge blind spots (cops, war on drugs, etc).

      • Chipwooder

        Indeed. They are hardcore WOD boosters too.

      • Tundra

        Ah, I don’t read that guy.

        They are conservatives. I don’t expect anything different. As you say, at least they are reporting on actual news.

      • Hyperion

        “Why the TW? Those guys are the only ones in our world even trying to do journalism.”

        Not true, there are plenty of them. The problem is that none of them can reach a wide enough audience to make any difference.

    • Q Continuum

      Reparations here we come!

      • leon

        Minnesota must pay for all the slaves that were held in their state!

      • R C Dean

        *checks Bro Dean’s Ancestry.com genetic report, spots traces of African DNA*

        When do I get my check?

      • Chipwooder

        Hah, you think you’re joking? If there ever were reparations, there will absolutely be people doing precisely that, and then suing when they are denied.

      • robc

        I haven’t got mine yet either.

    • Hyperion

      Let me ask a humble question here, for all ya’ll geniuses here who have much more wisdom and knowledge about this law stuff than I do. Isn’t it already illegal to lynch someone? I mean I saw that in the movies when I was a kid, but I didn’t know it was still common practice round these here parts.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It is already illegal to murder someone.

        Lynching laws are explicitly designed to give the Feds jurisdiction over a state crime under the color of anti-hate crime legislation.

        However, if a state does not prosecute a murder, I believe the Feds already have the power to intervene based on deprivation of civil rights. Someone double-check me here.

        In other words, this is about expanding the prosecutorial powers of the Feds so that they have more opportunity to grandstand on dead bodies, or sometimes not quite so dead. Lynching is a bygone institution unless you drastically expand the definition of it, just like every other socially charged word has been expanded.

      • Hyperion

        “In other words, this is about expanding the prosecutorial powers of the Feds”

        Does that mean they can go to Portlandia and prosecute antifa?

      • leon

        Antifa has no history of “Lethal” violence.*

        An actual quote from some dumbass blue check on twitter.

      • kbolino

        Well, the link works at least, even if it’s a lot more text than I intended.

  51. BakedPenguin

    More old guy music by Al’s dad.

  52. Rebel Scum

    You are one of the best QB’s in the NFL. Stop fucking groveling to marxist/fascist speech police.

    Brees took to Instagram again to make his apology, but this time he made a video as opposed to writing. The Saints signal-caller said that he wanted to make the video so people could “see in my eyes how I sorry I am.”

    “I know that it hurt many people,” the future Hall of Famer said.. “That was never my intention. I wish I would have laid out what was on my heart in regards to the George Floyd murder, Ahmaud Arbery, the years and years of social injustice, police brutality and the need for so much reform and change in regard to legislation and so many other things to bring equality to our black communities.

    “I’m sorry. I will do better and I will be a part of the solution. I am your ally. I know no words will do that justice, that’s going to have to be…” then the video abruptly ends.

    I used to think you were an alright guy. Now I think you are an unprincipled pussy.

    • Chipwooder

      The punch line is that Brees voiced the approved opinions about everything except the kneeling during the anthem (which I don’t know why we even play before every sporting event in the first place, but that’s a different discussion). That was his only deviation for the party line, and it had nothing to do with the cause the kneeling is meant to promote. For that, he is now persona non grata.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Too bad he doesn’t realize that the groveling won save him. If he did maybe he could get out with his dignity intact.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      BEND THE KNEE

      It’s not about discourse now, it’s about submission to the narrative.

      • leon

        Bending the Knee is what killed George Floyd!

      • R C Dean

        “BEND THE KNEE”

        I thought a white guy bending the knee is what set this whole thing off.

      • Rebel Scum

        *rimshot*

  53. Hyperion

    We have proof!

    Yeah, well I bet that was really really difficult to get. Duh, which way did he go George, which way did he go?

    Barr reminds me of some sadsack hog jowl sad overgrown puppy cartoon character. Anyway, going back to the topic at hand, what the fuck are you going to do about it, deputy dawg? Fucking nothing, you’re not going to do nothing. This is the one thing that really irks me about Trump. First the garden gnome, Sessions, and now this cartoon dog character. Fuck! Doesn’t Trump have anyone around him, who can advise him to not make stupid appointments like this? Or is it just that he won’t listen to anyone? At least we didn’t get Christy as AG, right? Fucking retarded shit.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Barr, and to a lesser extent Trump himself, are all hat and no cattle.

      • Hyperion

        Hmm, Barr should get him a big ol ten gallon hat and pin a sheriff star on his vest. That would really accentuate the cartoon dog character effect.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        Lovett / Strait 2020 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ?

      • Hyperion

        “Lovett / Strait”

        Is that a country music duet?

    • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

      Doesn’t Trump have anyone around him

      He has to keep firing the same people he told us were tremendous people when he hired them last year?

      • Hyperion

        If he’d learn how to hire competent people to start with, he wouldn’t have to fire them all. This isn’t celebrity apprentice. Like I said, this is the thing that has irked me about Trump from the beginning. Sometimes he appears to get lucky, like with the new Press Secretary. And yes, I know press secretaries don’t have to be approved by Congress. That has noting to do with it, Trump is just a bad talent scout. He needs an HR dept or something, not made up of HR people. I’d put Rand in charge of that.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        While I agree, I’ll point out that Flynn was the lynchpin of Trump’s new administration. When they went after him, they removed him from the equation and scared a lot of competent Trump sympathizers off, which was undoubtedly part of the plan.

      • Chipwooder

        I’ve read several articles saying that might have been the most important factor in railroading Flynn: to send a message that anyone who works for Trump can be professionally and personally destroyed by the Borg.

      • leon

        Well working for a nazi should get you destroyed.

      • Hyperion

        And they still have the guy tied up in federal court due to no crime at all, after nearly 4 years? Can’t Trump just pardon this guy already? Am I missing something here?

      • Rebel Scum

        Trump is Biden his time.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        If Trump pardons him, Flynn can’t work in the administration and it’s a political mess.

        It’s far better that Flynn be acquitted, for Flynn and Trump.

      • Chipwooder

        I think it’s more about Flynn wanting to be exonerated rather than pardoned, which is understandable.

      • Hyperion

        I think he has been acquitted, but then liberal judges around the country have started making their own rules.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Sullivan is just holding up the foregone conclusion now.

        He’s either a total moron, or somebody is forcing him to risk his career and reputation.

      • kbolino

        Quite the opposite. Flynn has technically been convicted. He has, through his attorneys at the time, submitted a guilty plea to the court. It was after that point that the DOJ dropped (or tried to drop) the case. The next step is supposed to be sentencing, but as the prosecution does not want to continue, I don’t really know what happens next. I know the judge was shopping around for amici curiae to take up the cause of the now-unwilling prosecution.

      • kbolino

        Flynn still hasn’t been sentenced yet, which may explain the delay in the pardon. There have been peremptory pardons before (Nixon comes to mind) but I don’t know if they’ve ever been issued in the middle of a trial.

      • Viking1865

        Yep. After he won the election, they knew they could still hamstring his agenda that way. Ann Coulter has spoken a ton about it. She dropped it on Twitter yesterday something about not bringing MAGA people and hiring half of Goldman Sachs.

        Personnel is policy. An actual conservative agenda, whether it be populist, libertarian, or social requires thousands of dedicated and competent appointees who can through years of dogged work get around the leftist permanent bureaucracy. But there are business as usual people in the Senate to keep you from doing that by holding up appointments.

        The American government is not actually run by elected officials. There’s millions of words of laws and regulations, and theres millions of highly paid full time bureaucrats who can use them to punish their political enemies, and they do.

        Put a 5 megaton warhead on each of Fairfax, Loudon, DC, Montgomery, and Prince George, move the capital to Kansas, and elect Republicans for the first three election cycles of the rebuild, and you might be able to start restoring the Constitution. But short of that, we’re not voting our way out of this.

      • Raven Nation

        Sir Humphrey Appleby: you are not here to run this department.

        Jim Hacker: I think I am. And the people think I am too.

        Sir Humphrey: with respect minister, you, ahh, they are wrong.

        Hacker: well, who does run this department.

        Sir Humphrey: I do.

      • Chipwooder

        Martin Gross, the guy who used to write books detailing government waste in the ’90s, advocated decentralizing everything in the federal government. The president would still live in the White House and Congress would still meet in the Capitol, but all of the other agencies would be scattered around the country.

      • ChipsnSalsa

        That would be so awesome. But being an idea I agree with, it will never happen.

      • EvilSheldon

        Would you mind terribly giving me a few hours notice before the sky falls?

      • Naptown Bill

        Yeah, that “Mad Dog” Mattis thing didn’t quite go the way he expected, I’d say. Mind you, the spat as I recall was over Mattis objecting to Trump pulling troops from Syria and Afghanistan, but still.

      • Viking1865

        I am quite serious here: there is literally no one who has attained a policy making rank over at least the last 30 years who is someone with a pro-liberty, pro Constitution mindset. No one. The officer corps is as thoroughly politicized as the FBI, the CIA, and all the civilian bureaucrats.

        Mad Dog is a swamp critter like all the rest. Do you seriously think the Obama admin would promote a general who wasn’t completely in agreement with their agenda?

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        well put

        it’s a power scheme; a bunch of egomaniacal warlords

        What is best for the country has never crossed their collective mind the first time.

        I remained shocked at how many people think that a large government topped by such men could ever be in their interest.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        * chomps popcorn*

        I remember Tillerson flaming out like Paul O’Neill. They both knew better, but they just had to get too close to the sun; no one with any sense would associate himself with those administrations. And, afterward, they were both then impotent to defend themselves. It’s the reverse-Trump: when you’re so stupid that you go to work for him not realizing that you are essentially surrendering your intellectual high horse and right to criticize him after he fires you. It’s a circle jerk of credibility loss: a dozen bugs stuck to to a strip of fly-paper muttering to no one in particular that this is certainly a fine mess they’ve gotten themselves into.

      • leon

        essentially surrendering your intellectual high horse and right to criticize him after he fires you.

        Remember when Romney changed his tune because he thought he might get Sec of State. Then Trump snubbed him.

        Perfect.

        Of course then he decided to become Massachusetts 3rd senator.

      • Chipwooder

        Mittens is so damned transparent. He stands for nothing other than furthering the political career of Willard Romney.

      • Fatty Bolger

        He wants to play the eminent statesman. But he’s too petty and vindictive to pull it off.

    • Drake

      I still think Christie would have been better than Sessions and maybe better than Barr. He’s a brawler – that’s what Trump needs.

      If Barr has proof, he should have already dispatched the FBI and Federal Marshals with arrest warrants to start rolling up the organization.

      • Hyperion

        “If Barr has proof, he should have already dispatched the FBI and Federal Marshals with arrest warrants to start rolling up the organization.”

        ^this^

      • WTF

        Yup, Christie’s a dick, but he’s also an aggressive attack dog who doesn’t give a shit.

    • Pat

      Yeah, well I bet that was really really difficult to get.

      I mean, it eluded the FBI.

      • Hyperion

        Good grief. Nice job draining that swamp, Donald.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        There’s a lot of jobs that have been created explicitly to combat right-wing militias. Understandably, they don’t want to lose the justification for their jobs.

        The answer is to create an anti-Antifa task force and make careers dependent on it. It’s the ugly, blunt solution, but that’s how bureaucracy works.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      First the garden gnome, Sessions, and now this cartoon dog character. Fuck! Doesn’t Trump have anyone around him, who can advise him to not make stupid appointments like this? Or is it just that he won’t listen to anyone?

      My guess is it’s the opposite and he has very little choice at all. He picked Sessions and Barr for the same reason Pence is his VP. They are all swamp creatures and the swamp takes care of its own. He probably has some sort of tenuous agreement with GOP leadership where they will support him, despite not being from the DC swamp, but he needs to fall mostly in lockstep with their guidance.

      He could declare war against the swamp, including the GOP, but that would mean fighting everyone in DC with virtually no allies. I don’t know how he could win that since the media has ensured he won’t have the approval of the people to clean house.

      • Drake

        If Trump wins big in November, the second term could be very interesting.

      • Rebel Scum

        I hope so.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Cheer me up Drake because I’m starting to think that ain’t happening.

      • Drake

        I think most of what is going on right now – both lockdowns and riots – are attempts to prevent a 2nd term. I still think he wins unless cheat-by-mail is allowed in swing-states.

      • Hyperion

        If you think the dems are shitting their pants now, well have been for nearly 4 years, imagine Trump as a lame duck. Bull in a China shop for realz?

    • Idle Hands

      Trump is Huey Long best we can hope for is another 4 years of him taking rice bowls from as many of these fucking assholes and giving those ricebowls to another set.

  54. ChipsnSalsa

    Any op eds about how much carbon is being released into the atmosphere with these riot fires? We are destroying mother Gaia with this.

    • leon

      Racisim is a more dangerous problem than impending destruction of the planet.

  55. Chipwooder

    Since I mentioned Michael Tracy, here’s another leftist who was able to recognize the cancer within his own movement, Freddie deBoer. For his apostasy, his brethren hounded him until he basically disappeared himself. This prescient rant was written three years ago.

    Now we’re Rudy Giuliani, trying to get offensive art pulled off the walls. Now we’re the book burners. Now we’re the censors. Now we attack the ACLU for defending free speech. Now we screech about community morals. Now we’re the prison camp screws. That’s us. Me, I could never be one of the good ones. Never. I can never live up to that ideal. I know I’m not good enough. I know when the judgment day comes, I go down. And so I decline. You can decline, too. You can say, “I decline the opportunity to be a cop.” But people are scared. Because they think, probably correctly, that if they aren’t a cop, they’ll end up a criminal. Well, I have no choice. I am not one of the goodies.

    The idea of the panopticon is one of the most tired and clichéd bits of theory talk you’ll find, one that reliably makes its way into every undergraduate paper and TV recap. It’s also wrong. See, the panopticon says we all get watched all the time, but there’s still a division between the guards and the prisoners. There’s still people who do the watching separate from the watched. And that’s not real life. No, in real life we’re all guards and prisoners at the same time. We are all informants on each other. Contemporary political culture is an autoimmune disorder. Do you enjoy living like this? Are you not exhausted? Don’t you want to break out? Or are you happy here, content to judge and judge and judge and never stop judging? Then congrats. Welcome to the nation of finks, planet of cops. Enjoy. Enjoy.

    • Hyperion

      Red pilled? I don’t see how any of these people calling themselves liberal cannot open their eyes and see the bullshit. But I know why, it’s because they don’t want to see it, they’re being intentionally ignorant, while antifa tells them ‘liberals get the bullet too’.

      • Chipwooder

        Only a few have – in addition to Tracy, Lee Fang (definitely leftist) has been talking about how insane everything is. Even Andrew Sullivan, though not a leftist (and used to call himself a conservative) is definitely liberal, has been posting about how ridiculous the NYT backtracking over Cotton’s op-ed has been.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        That’s the other thread I saw, Tracey defending Fang and being excoriated for it. The Twitter scrunts are merciless.

      • Viking1865

        They will wring their hands, and rend their garments. The Spanish democratic socialists and secular liberals were very very very upset that the communists and anarchists were violent, but oh gosh its so important that we secularize and liberalize Spain, but oh no why are they so violent why why why. But they kept going into governance with them. Then finally, the commies murdered a conservative member of legislature, and that was the final straw which led to the military coup.

        It’s been that way in every country since 1917. There’s always moderate, well spoken, educated and reasonable men of the Left who wring their hands and say “oh dear” and “this is not who we are” while the street fighters crack heads and murder the clergy. They deplore the violence. It’s terrible. Horrid. But, oh well, omelettes. Eggs.

      • kbolino

        Did you exchange handles with Winston?

    • Chipwooder

      Forgot to link the piece itself. Worth reading in full.

      For all the yammering about “the new normal” during the height of WuFlu panic, this is what I’m afraid the new normal is, and it’s repulsive.

    • kbolino

      It is a pity that the ACLU caved since then.

      • Chipwooder

        The ACLU is the biggest oxymoron on earth now. They do absolutely nothing to promote civil liberty and haven’t for some time now.

      • kbolino

        Some of the local chapters still do some good work sometimes, but the organization as a whole is moving closer to lockstep with the progressive narrative.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        They were suing somewhere in furtherance of maintaining the coronavirus lockdown. They suck.

      • R C Dean

        The apple doesn’t fall far from the commie tree.

        They were never principled. They were always advancing leftism. Even the Skokie Nazi March case was tactical, to give them the veneer ofprincipled impartiality. And they’ve been dining out on it for decades.

  56. Rebel Scum

    I see this cunte has changed her tune on protests during the commie-cough panicdemic.

    On Thursday, Michigan Democrat Governor Gretchen Whitmer marched along with demonstrators with her hands held up as they chanted “Hands Up, Don’t Shoot!” The marchers were responding to the death of George Floyd, whose death while in police custody triggered protests, riots and looting across the nation.

    Whitmer marching in close proximity with protesters would seem to be at odds with her own policy; in May, a Michigan barber who reopened his shop in the face of Whitmer’s orders got his business and professional licenses suspended. Dana Nessel, the state’s attorney general, issued a statement saying, “Mr. Manke’s actions in violating Gov. Whitmer’s executive orders as well as other health orders put the public at risk for contracting Covid-19. Any time you have a barber or other professional providing services to numerous citizens in close proximity to each other and those citizens are then returning to their various residences, there is a risk of contracting and spreading the virus. It is paramount that we take action to protect the public and do our part to help save lives.”

    • Chipwooder

      Even among politicians, she’s especially disgusting.

      • Hyperion

        Dem VP material?

        Every single female Biden has a choice of, are disgusting obnoxious cuntes. I guess Bernie is going to have to transition and become Bernita. I hope he looks good in a skirt.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        I’d be shocked if it isn’t going to be Liz Warren. She’s been backing off all the policies she started to support 3 months ago when she was trying to campaign against Bernie.

      • Hyperion

        It IS going to Warren, so there will be no shock.

      • Viking1865

        My prediction is that Biden will announce before the election that he will name women to each of the Big 4 Cabinet posts.

        Harris for AG, Warren for Treasury, Duckworth for Defense. Maybe Herself returns to State, maybe its Powers.

    • mrfamous

      I kinda got to hand it to her: this is some top tier trolling. She’s got a future on 4chan if she wants it.

  57. Festus

    Main takeaways from this morning – I love this web-site and the people here, I should probably stop drinking so damn much and why do the people at work seem to love me so much? It makes me feel I dunno, uncomfortable? I’m used to derision, not plaudits. Drunken musings. Have a great one, Glibs and we’ll see you in the chat, Cthulu willing.

  58. Stinky Wizzleteats

    I think she wins the shitty governor contest hands down. Newsome, Cuomo, and Northam really need to step up their game.

  59. Scruffy Nerfherder

    HEY DON

    I borrowed some of your post from earlier and incorporated into a Facederp rant that I would like people to criticize before I post it. Please skewer and refine.

    The lost appeal of first principles is one of the most devastating wounds to Western Civilization in the last half century. We don’t discuss things in those terms anymore. Instead we resort to weasel words, nihilism, relativism, and identity politics. Our media and our leaders are whipping us into a frenzy for their purposes, not ours.

    Discourse has become untethered from reason and driven by emotion. This is postmodernism / critical theory, where feelings trump logic, where ends justify means, where power is the only metric. It allows people to hold two contradictory ideas in their minds and justifies it with feelings. It disallows moral and intellectual consistency and justifies it with feelings.

    We must have reasoned discourse on the way forward or the problems we currently are experiencing will not be solved. And both sides of the culture war are complicit, if not always equally so. Reflexively defending or attacking the police or the protesters is not the way forward. Collective guilt is not the way forward. Collective blame is not the way forward. These concepts prevent us from coming together as individuals, rational and capable of making individual moral choices. Instead they condemn us to being divided along identitarian lines and forever exploited for political advantage. Instead they form the intellectual basis for exactly that which we purport to be seeking to end, injustice.

    We either judge people as individuals based on the content of their character and their actions, or we do not. There is no middle ground.

    Civil and property rights, which includes the right to live, are the foundation of everything we hold dear in this country. If we abandon them, then we abandon ourselves to the mob and the State. George Floyd having the right to live and that nameless business owner having the right to their property are not contradictory ideas, in fact they depend on each other. If you lose one, you lose the other and we all become lesser for it.

    • leon

      Talking about First Principles and Western Civilization makes you a white supremacist. Nazi. Hate boi.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Shit

        *starts reading Foucault*

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        It’ll be worse than that: “What are first principles?”

      • leon

        First? sounds like you’re saying some are better than others. RACIST!

    • Drake

      I know that your last paragraph has examples of first principles, but will they recognize them on facederp? You might want to immediately define them.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Good point, thanks

        I’m assuming too much

    • kinnath

      Good words,

      Get used to living in isolation.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’m resigned to losing some friends. But at this point, I can’t not introduce something into their echo chamber that might make them think, even if only to rebut me.

        If I don’t speak my mind, then I’m as much of a moral coward as those who compromise their principles for acceptance.

      • Sean

        Embrace your inner shitlord.

      • Hyperion

        I gave this advice to my wife, and now she has no more facebook frenz. Mission accomplished.

        I remember when one of her ‘frenz’, before she asked me to delete her facebook account, had made the statement that ‘calling someone a retard is illegal’. Because she said stupid shit on the internet and people called her a retard. I said ‘hmm, let’s test that, I take the heat’, so I posted as her in reply to her genius ‘friend’ ‘ RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD RETARD!’. I didn’t get arrested, so I guess she was wrong.

      • Hyperion

        I warned her that giving me her laptop and allowing me to reply to her friends would result in zero facebook friends left. So, it happened, and then she went out shitposting on her own, on other social media. Red Pilled.

      • Drake

        My wife was always consevative without wasting much thought on politics. 2020 has thoroughly red-pilled her. As in “let’s move to a deep red state and buy lots of land and guns”.

      • kinnath

        If I don’t speak my mind, then I’m as much of a moral coward as those who compromise their principles for acceptance.

        Talk to people face to face.

        Post pictures of kittens; do not contribute to political bullshit on facebook.

      • Mojeaux

        Post pictures of kittens; do not contribute to political bullshit on facebook.

        This x100megamillion

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I really don’t post at all in general. And I’m damn sure not going to post explicitly political stuff.

        But I don’t see where interrupting the near constant flow of AMEN’s is a bad thing. And if they block me for that, so be it.

  60. Juvenile Bluster

    Fucking A, the DMV is finally re-opened (appointment only). My license has been expired for more than two months. Finally going to get it renewed next week.

    • R C Dean

      Urgh. Block off the day, because it will be mobbed with the backlog.

  61. leon

    Would you rather be percieved as a Moron or as Evil?

    I’d rather someone just say i’m being evil. I fucking know what i’m doing, and i’m not bumbling around like an idiot. I’ve thought out my positions. So if you are going to call me something, just forgo the faux decency and call me evil like you really want to. / end speach into the air.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Far better for that than to be known as a moral coward, which is what my Ivy League acquaintances are. They’re desperate to show how they’re good white people and completely unwilling to challenge the narrative, even if it’s blatantly false.

      It’s virtue signaling all the way down.

    • Drake

      I’ll take evil and dangerous over being a Drew Brees.

  62. Certified Public Asshat

    All Black Lives Matter—that includes Black trans women.— Kamala Harris (@KamalaHarris) June 3, 2020

    The most virtuous one of all has spoken.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      What about trans-racial women?

      /Dolezal

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Alright, now they’re subdividing their subgroups.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      “All black lives matter, especially the ones I threw in prison for marijuana, and especially the ones I fought to keep in prison because if we let them out it would deprive the state of slave labor. And also the ones that were found guilty by the crooked Orange County prosecutors I defended” – Kamala Harris, injected with truth serum.

      • kbolino

        I like yours better

      • leon

        That’s because you love the truth.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        my first laugh of the day

        I love you guys

      • Chipwooder

        Don’t forget the ones she put in jail for their kid skipping school.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Them too. She did so much authoritarian shit as San Francisco DA and California AG that it’s hard to remember it all.

        I have no clue how she got any support as a Dem candidate in the primary (I can understand why she won in California, because they’d vote for anyone as long as they have a D next to their name). She’s done more to subjugate black people than all of the other candidates (including Trump) put together.

    • kbolino

      What was Harris’s old job I wonder? I’m sure she was never at the helm of that police juggernaut before, no sirree.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        She was at the helm of Willie Brown’s juggernaut.

      • Rebel Scum

        +1 Horizontal Harris

      • Juvenile Bluster

        ba-dum tiss.

        Now if you’ll excuse me, you made me picture Kamala Harris and Willie Brown having sex and I need to go drink a gallon of bleach.

      • Chipwooder

        Injecting it into your eyes works faster

      • Certified Public Asshat

        But…puts down syringe. I can’t keep up anymore.

  63. Pope Jimbo

    A great idea from a great mind. I’m sure she also added the relevant enumerated power that this legislation will rely on in her bill.

    Omar is proposing a new, independent federal agency, the National Police Brutality Investigation Board. Her legislation, co-sponsored by Rep. Ayanna Pressley of Massachusetts and Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee of Texas. calls for the board to issue recommendations that are non-binding but admissible in court. The legislation also proposes that federal funding for law enforcement be reduced or revoked should the board find that they are not taking meaningful action on the board’s recommendations.

    • leon

      As Malice said:

      “Yo, I heard you hate cops. So i decided to put some cops over your cops, so you could hate your cop’s cops”

    • kbolino

      Commerce clause, of course, that catch-all do-what-you-want provision of the Constitution.

      There is no such thing as an “independent” agency of the Federal government. An agency must be part of one of the legislative, judicial, or executive branches. If it can affect the implementation of the law, then it is an executive agency and as such is answerable to the President.

      This isn’t a terrible idea on the surface but I’m sure it will be put to terrible purposes. Such as, if your police department doesn’t spend its money on “anti-bias training” or somesuch, the only certified provider of which just happens to be connected to the legislators and board members who implemented the requirement, then its funding will be reduced.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It will be implemented exactly as the way the Dept of Ed has been implemented over the last couple of decades.

      • Pope Jimbo

        They might try to create it along the lines of the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau. One dept head, no way to remove them, funding independent.

        And I’m sure they will issue dumb things like “we noticed that your arrestees are 25% black, while your population is only 14% black. No funding for you!”

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I think I would just eliminate all federal funding for all things the Feds are forbidden to do themselves.

        I’m a dreamer.

      • leon

        There is no such thing as an “independent” agency of the Federal government.

        Federal Reserve slinks off into the bushes.

  64. Mojeaux

    DON’T YOU PEOPLE WORK?! /Rufus

    I cannot keep up with comments!

    • UnCivilServant

      Know anything about troubleshooting high memory usage in PeopleSoft, or tuning the swap configuration of Solaris Logical Domains?

      • kbolino

        Do you like paying for Larry Ellison’s fourteenth mega-yacht?

      • UnCivilServant

        I did not make the decision to use PeopleSoft.

        But yeah, my entire primary work environment is Oracle software on Oracle OSes on Oracle Hardware.

        You don’t want to know how much the New York Taxpayers pay Larry every year.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I remember back in the day, the biggest stockholder in Oracle was Larry Ellison. The next 4 biggest stockholders were his ex-wives. (Can’t remember the exact number, but you get the idea).

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I chuckled because it’s true.

    • Jarflax

      Wait, the person who usually drops 17 comments while I am writing one response, who is usually simultaneously engaged in 7 other places while doing that, is complaining about the pace of comments?

      • Hyperion

        Stop patronizing her, I’m the one who does that! Why does SHE always get all the credit?

      • Mojeaux

        He called me The Worst and then he gave it all to GT.

      • Hyperion

        She was more deserving, sorry, you can’t always win!

      • Hyperion

        Who is this WE you speak of?

      • commodious spittoon

        Zamyatin?

      • Mojeaux

        Right now is high-intensity brainwork power. Zone, man. I was in the zone, the flow, the slipstream. TWICE!

        And this is the thanks I get.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      I’m working on a Merger Agreement and taking 15 minute breaks here and there because merger agreements are giant contracts that are fucking boring to work on.

      This afternoon I have a call for some work with one of my pro bono clients, which is the way I make my soul-crushing job a little more tolerable.

      • Jarflax

        I’m avoiding reading the proposed complete overhaul of Ohio’s LLC statute, because 1. It is hundreds of pages of mindnumbing and 2. after I read it I will have to start redoing my operating agreement template to incorporate the changes, and 3. it allows series LLCs here which means I have to wrap my head around what that will mean for my clients going forward, and which if any clients I need to call up and make suggestions (probably none, I don’t see any real advantage to series llcs here because we don’t have annual filings so there is not a problem just using multiple llcs).

      • Mojeaux

        That…sounds…lovely.

        I would have to set aside a week and block everything else out, and I would be dreading every second until the clock started.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        I was one of about a couple of dozen people that worked on the overhaul of Florida’s LLC Act (passed 2013) and the Corporate Act (passed 2019). I was a co-reporter (basically third in command) on the latter. We’re still discussing Series LLCs and may be putting those forward next year.

        I’m not really sure about Series LLCs either, but a lot of people seem to want them (we do have annual reports here).

    • Hyperion

      No one works anymore. The new golden age is upon us, where everything is free and no one has to pay for it.

    • robc

      Chapter 18 is the answer to my question from the other day. I was cruising along in some fantasy novel and slammed head on into porn.

      • Mojeaux

        You’re welcome.

      • UnCivilServant

        Wasn’t me. I make very certain I didn’t accidentally copy-paste porn into my books before publishing them.

      • Mojeaux

        Oh, and THAT is why Bridget can’t get out of the friend-zone. That is why I included it.

      • Mojeaux

        One reason.

      • robc

        So what is your take on ladder theory?

        Because if you buy it, men don’t really have a “friend zone”. Men only have one ladder and all 3.5B women in the world are on it in ordinal preference. Very Austrian Economics. So there is no friend zone, it just means she isn’t high enough up the ladder to outrank his other available options (of which Grimme has many).

        Women, on the other hand, have two ladders, a sex ladder and a friend ladder. And switching between is nigh impossible.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s best to have a foot on both the sex and friend ladders.

        That happened to me once back in my twenties. It was glorious.

      • Mojeaux

        Grimme’s got a straight-up fetish.

        He also has a very primal fear, which Bridget represents. Has to do with black and every time he looks at her, he feels it. That is not revealed in the freebie chapters. Also, she does something very specific (quite unintentionally) (that she would never have thought of) that gets her out of the friendzone.

        And actually, I did ask the Glibertariat about a man’s friend-zone, whether he could wake up one day and look at a woman he’s not interested in sexually and then…is.

  65. RAHeinlein

    President of Morehouse College is on Squawk – “CEO’s need to have conversations about white superiority” – “our students are fully engaged and prepared for this moment”

    • UnCivilServant

      “Noted, we will not be hiring anyone who’s attended Morehouse College”

      • Drake

        They make a mean soy latte.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Morehouse is an all-male HBCU.

        My guess is they’re cranking out attorneys.

      • UnCivilServant

        Wait, so you’re saying it’s both racist and sexist?

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        et facta est lux

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      “CEO’s need to have conversations about white superiority”

      That’s a hell of a slip of the tongue.

      • Jarflax

        Yeah, what are these conversations supposed to be? “Get out there and hire me some more of them smart white boys!” “Get some of them slanty eyed dudes while you’re at it”

      • Chipwooder

        Heh….reminds me of the vegan chick who got twatter all a-twitter by trying to promote animal rights by comparing that cause to BLM. It went over……somewhat poorly.

    • Pope Jimbo

      I’m sure the president of Morehouse gave a shout out to Trump for shoveling a ton of money at the HBCU’s.

      • R C Dean

        “Then you won’t be participating in our systems of white supremacy by taking our filthy white money any more, I take it?”

    • ChipsnSalsa

      An “office of equity and diversity” in every publicly traded company. Doesn’t have the same ring as a chicken in every pot.

  66. The Late P Brooks

    You may have noticed i haven’t been around for a while. I’m not really much of a “share-er” but i will offer an explanation. I am in Indianapolis, and for various reasons, technological and otherwise, I am mostly in radio silence mode. I have lurked a few times, and been rewarded with a few much-needed guffaws.

    Nearly two months ago, my mother fell, striking her head so hard that she has been hospitalized ever since. Due to plague restrictions, nobody in the family has been allowed to visit her. Face time video calls are better than nothing, but are a piss poor substitute for in person literal hand-holding. It weighs on everybody. Her ability to leave assisted care and return to her home is much in doubt.

    Prior to that, my father experienced a couple of weird episodes of cognitive difficulty which were initially ascribed to stress. That diagnosis has recently been amended to included a brain tumor. They are doing a biopsy right now. He is both smart and wise, and has clearly expressed his unwillingness to undergo a bunch of pointless invasive science projects to prolong his existence. He keeps apologizing for “doing this’ to us.

    My brother came out here when my dad originally began having problems in early March, and has been here since, caring for him and taking care of their household stuff, which is truly a gift.

    I am just here, hanging around and feeling as if I am not making much of a substantive contribution, but at least i can spend time with my dad. He has been good and generous to me, perhaps more than he should, but I’m not complaining.

    I am in limbo.

    Keep up the good work, you people.

    • Mojeaux

      Oh, Brooksie, I am so sorry.

      He keeps apologizing for “doing this’ to us.

      That’s the worst feeling in the world, on both sides.

      My mom said that to me as I was helping her perform a delicate process, and I just said, “It’s my pleasure.”

    • Chipwooder

      Oh man….very sorry to hear it Brooksie

    • Tundra

      Jesus christ, Brooksie.

      I’m so sorry, brother. I will pray for you and your family.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Uffda. I’m so sorry to hear about your troubles.

      Not allowing people to visit is an abomination. I realize the risk of CV, but still.

      • Tundra

        I actually don’t get it. We got to visit a good buddy who was in his last few days of life after a brutal fight with cancer. Absolutely zero immune system. The nurses made us gown and mask up, but admitted it was just for show.

        His daughter told us later that it was the only time in the last week of his life that he laughed.

        Fuck this inhumane shit. Being alive =/= living.

      • Mojeaux

        Well, it’s the same line of reasoning that says “yeah, you’re dying [quickly], but no, you can’t have more painkillers because you might become an addict and no, you can’t try investigational drugs because they might kill you.”

      • Chipwooder

        He should just tell them that he’s protesting at the hospital and if they deny him access then they obviously are horrible racists who have no respect for black bodies.

    • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

      so sorry to hear this but really appreciate such a thoughtful post

      It sounds like you come from decent people, that there’s a full circle of thoughtful selflessness at work: maybe someone will learn from your family’s example

    • wdalasio

      My sympathies, Mr. Brooks. I’ll keep your parents in my thoughts.

    • bacon-magic

      Hope it gets better sir.

    • Sensei

      “Keep up the good work, you people.”

      You too! We will still be here. Take your time.

    • Count Potato

      Sorry 🙁

      “Due to plague restrictions, nobody in the family has been allowed to visit her.”

      That is just awful.

    • Sean

      Sorry to hear about your parents.

    • The Other Kevin

      Sorry, Brooks. Hope things turn around for you soon.

    • Fourscore

      You are a good son, Brooks, we need more of your kind. I’m convinced your Dad enjoys knowing you are around, doing some things with him and for him.

    • EvilSheldon

      Aww man, that’s fucking terrible. I hope everything works out.

    • Hyperion

      Sorry to hear about that, prayers, bro.

    • grrizzly

      Sorry. I hope the virus restrictions are relaxed soon and you can see you mother.

    • I'm Here To Help

      Man, I’m sorry to hear this! I’m dreading this exact situation with my parents – we’re trying to get them down here with us so we can take care of them directly in their last years.

      You’ll be in our thoughts and prayers…

    • banginglc1

      Prayers for your family. If you need to get out and have dinner some night, let me know. I think Evan is in town due to his medical stuff too. Screenname at the evil alphabet company is my email.

    • Tulip

      So sorry

  67. mrfamous

    What do you suppose the percentage chance is that George Orwell would have gotten his Twitter account suspended by now?

    • Juvenile Bluster

      Orwell no, because despite what he said he was a socialist, so he had the right ideas.

      Now (C.S.) Lewis and Huxley? Definitely banned.

      • mrfamous

        Mencken? Twain?

      • kbolino

        I think Lewis had an easier time getting his works published. Orwell was critical of Stalinism at a time when the left in Great Britain still romanticized it.

      • mrfamous

        Orwell is still referred to as a “traitor” by segments of the hard left. Segments that at least temporarily appear ascendant.

  68. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Fucking hell the Dow. It’s insanity.

    • Tundra

      It’s the jobz report, isn’t it?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Yes but it still seems nuts to me. There was practically nowhere to go but up.

      • Jarflax

        It’s letting me sell covered calls on stocks I plan to dump if they hit target prices anytime soon and pick up a few bucks so I like it, but yeah, there is a part of me that wants to start buying out of the money puts left and right to cash in on crash 2 correction boogaloo I suspect is incoming in the next few months.

      • Mojeaux

        I suspect is incoming in the next few months

        Well, that’s the trick, ain’t it?

        When I was a kid, my dad taught me how to read the stock tables in the paper and how it all worked. He was trying, bless his heart, but he just didn’t have any seed money.

        Anyway, whenever he (tentatively) talked about stocks to people, they’d go, “I have a tip for you. Buy low and sell high [GUFFAW GUFFAW GUFFAW]!!!” then nudge me with an elbow and a wink. “Remember that, kid.” It was disrespectful to roll my eyes at adults, so I didn’t do that.

        That taught him not to talk to people about stocks, which, I’m sure, made him miss out on a lot of actually good information.

      • R C Dean

        A sizable chunk of the spike in unemployment was furloughed workers (who still had jobs) applying for the Phat Phederal bennies. I’ve got three of them in my tiny department. The question was how many were going to convert to “no job no mo”. Sounds like a chunk of them are going back to work (including all three of mine).

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        I’m not paying 20 times earnings, I don’t care how low the discount rate goes

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Earnings?

        What are those?

      • Fourscore

        20 X earnings is still 5%. It probably can’t be sustained, inflation and taxes will eat up that 5%. In the old days we’d have been happy with 5%.

        Trump announced a bigly stimulus bill this morning. I gotta say Wall Street is taking care of their own. Its good for me as even a small guy but we need to see some production.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        20 X earnings is still 5%.

        Stipulated

        My ejaculation didn’t flesh out my whole view, of course. I’ll pound the risk drum some more if no one’s heard it before: it’s 5% if you get 5%; one might be buying 5 or even 8%, but a substantial fraction of 0 to -20% outcomes are in the likeliness distribution as well.

        I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Trump’s unprincipled tangents make it impossible to make good business decisions; even when he was braying about the stock market’s growth, what went unsaid (except for my posts here) was how much money was off the table until the typhoon passes.

        I’m not sure the old compasses and charts are good for these waters.

      • Jarflax

        ^This. A 5% dividend yield is a 5% return. 20x earnings is not a 5% return. You have to receive the money before it becomes a return. And it needs to come out of actual profit not “free cash flow” while the company is simultaneously increasing debt. The market is currently (and for years has been) charging both a premium for ‘safety’ and a premium for ‘potential’ growth, while using extremely optimistic definitions of both.

      • Hyperion

        “Does it have anything to do with people going back to work after the lockdowns are finishing? Just curious. ”

        Could be.

        Muh jerbz!

      • Fatty Bolger

        Yep. Ohio is opening theaters, museums, and some other stuff next week. I wonder if the reluctance of the blue states to releasing the lockdowns, and the slow rollout of places being unlocked is going to backfire. Instead of one big jump, and then a plateau or even a decline, it could lead to an extended period of improving job numbers going into the election.

    • Sean

      The Dems must be shitting themselves.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The second crash is going to hurt.

      People seem to forget that the big drop during the Depression came in 1930 after the rally from the 1929 lows.

      That’s when it fell 80%.

      The entire rise of the last ten years has been to stock buybacks. Does anyone really think that’s going to continue? We’re trading on fumes right now.

  69. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Sorry to hear it Brooks.

  70. Scruffy Nerfherder

    I wish you and yours the best Brooks.

    So much so that I unthreaded my response to show solidarity with you crazy-ass unthreaded weirdos.

  71. The Late P Brooks

    Thank you all for your kind words and good thoughts.

    This place is an incredible oasis of humanity in an insane world.

    • Jarflax

      You are in my thoughts and prayers.

  72. grrizzly

    The main screen on Fire TV right now is black and says “Black lives matter. Amazon stands in solidarity with the Black community.”

    • UnCivilServant

      File a complaint that someone has hacked their network and defaced the banner.

  73. I'm Here To Help

    Quick question that I think this group of degenerates will provide ample advice on – in light of recent events I’ve been exercising my 2nd amendment rights and have had my pistol on me any time I have left the house. I am not a huge fan of my current gun (Springfield XD-E .45). I can manage pretty tight groupings with it, and it isn’t overly uncomfortable to carry, but any time I fire it my trigger finger gets beat to hades and back, and this limits range time on it to 100 rounds at a time at most. I’ve never had any problems with any of the other XDs that I’ve had (full frame XD in 9mm, XD-S in both 9 and .45), and I have read that others with larger hands have had similar problems with the XD-E, with the most frequent blame placed on the excessive curve of the trigger.

    So now I am looking to replace it with something that would be just as easy (if not easier) to carry. Wife has a Sig P938, but I fear that is a bit too small for my meat slabs of hands (she hasn’t let me shoot it yet, partially out of fear that I’ll like it too much). Looking for something that is relatively small, not striker fired (I like hammers), and easy to carry concealed IWB. Never been a fan of revolvers – never shot one that I enjoyed shooting. I’ve tried out the H&K P30SK, but that was a bit too wide for my tastes.

    Any suggestions that I should consider? Looking for a compact/sub compact in 9mm, probably single stack as I prefer narrower pistols, hammer fired. Other than my antiques, all the pistols I’ve owned have been Springfield, but I don’t have any brand loyalty. So I’ll take any advice y’all have!

    • kinnath

      Springfield 1911 EMP (3.3 inch barrel, 9 in the magazine plus 1 in the chamber, so it has a “long” grip for a sub-compact)

      or

      Springfield 1911 EMP Champion (4 inch barrel, 10 + 1, so the grip is even longer).

      I carry the EMP in a shoulder harness. I have not tried to conceal carry the EMP champion

      • kinnath

        I also have the Sig P938 with an extended magazine (so 7+1), I can barely get my pinky finger on the grip, but it is much better than the standard 6+1 configuration.

        This I carry in a pocket holster.

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        extended magazine

        I really like any pistol that can accept longer magazines. I carry 10+1, but I can always slap in a long boy if I need to start a small revolution.

      • I'm Here To Help

        I really need to pry the P938 away from my wife to give it a try – when she brought it home I tucked it into my pocket just to see how it would fit and it was pretty comfortable.

      • kinnath

        I love shooting my two springfield EMPs.

        The Sig p938 is quite “snappy” in comparison. But I can certainly be accurate out to 15 yards with it. It is a great pistol in a small package.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Beretta PX4 Storm Compact

      It’s a DA/SA double stack with a rotating barrel.

    • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

      standard disclaimer: I am not a Glockboi

      but my son’s EDC, the G26 , is certainly an option

      I’m ignoring your single-stack spec a bit here as I suspect it’s overly limiting, especially in 9mm. The G26 is only an inch wide; if you’ve been carrying 45 (#MeToo, my EDC is a G30 which is 1.12″ wide), that’s certainly an inch wide as well.

      Gen4 (and I presume Gen5) have backstrap shims, so you can set the trigger to your hand perfectly (although I’ll confess I’m not sure I entirely understand your current fit problem).

      • I'm Here To Help

        Quite honestly, I don’t understand my current fit problem either. Like I said, I’ve shot plenty of XDs over the years and never had any problem with any of them, including the XD-S in .45, which is a pretty similar sized gun. All I know is that with the XD-E, my trigger finger ends up hitting the trigger guard on every shot. Looking at the triggers for the XD-S and XD-E, the XD-e has a much more aggressive curve to it, and I do find my finger creeping towards the bottom of the curve to comfortably pull, especially in DA.

        Single stack was only in there because of the width – if I can find a double stack that stays within the 1-1.25″ range, I’d be happy. The H&K P30SK was just too wide for what I’m used to (I think it is around 1.5″ and has even wider controls if I remember correctly).

        And I guess I should have said it – I have never liked Glocks. Tried out a bunch of them, didn’t like any of them. Granted, the last time I picked up one was probably close to 20 years ago…

      • Don Escaped the Virus . . . remember the virus?

        Glock is the F150 of pistols: probably works for most folk for years but is suboptimal for many as well. As an engineer and a manage, I live with compromise and settle much more quickly than others, so I’m very patient with Glock. As a marksman, I don’t like Glock at all; but I do confess that the faster I run one, but better it seems to behave, kind of light a short stroker getting up on a big cam, not meant to be idled.

        If I could find a way to get 1911 fit and trigger without the cocked-and-locked risk, that would strike (pardon the pun) me as ideal.

    • Sean

      Sig P239 or go double stack and get a Beretta 92x G compact.

    • l0b0t

      Late to the party, but I have a Star (Spanish made) Firestar Model 43 in 9mm. It is small but all steel so felt recoil is minimal. My only issue with it is the round capacity; when I carried, I carried a Para Ordnance P12 because, IMO, 12+1 .45 more often than not, trumps 7+1 9mm.