Smoked Carne Asada ala Sloper

by | Oct 4, 2020 | Cooking, Food & Drink, Recipes | 348 comments

 

A few weeks ago low and behold my local grocer had sirloin steaks on sale for $2.99 a lb. This equated to a family pack of 5 large thick steaks for around 12 clams. Even a vegan can’t pass up a deal like that. Well, at least not a smart vegan with meat loving friends they want to bless with a bunch of meat. I am neither a vegan or have friends so I ate them all myself. (Ok, I gave a few to my parents) To achieve this I gave them a two day salted sit in the fridge, a sprinkle of Montreal Steak seasoning and then smoked them all low and slow to an internal of medium rare.

 

Not pictured are the ones I gave away.

 

After I smoked the steaks, into the food processor they went for a medium chop. Ya, I am lazy. Or efficient, take your pick. I did about a half a steak at a time after chunking up a bit with a knife until I had a large bowl of chopped smoked sirloin. To this I added some lime juice, cumin, and fresh chopped cilantro. Then I got out the old plow disk/pan and I plowed ahead to make some tacos.

For tacos, first corn tortillas must be warmed and browned to almost crispy in my opinion. Being a gringo, I like my tortillas browned like the people I am appropriating the food from. I didn’t have the plow disc hot enough to brown my tortillas to my desired browny crispiness.

 

Bowl of asada

 

A tortilla.

I then threw some of the smoked sirloin asada on the plow disc and plowed ahead with my poorly browned tortilla.

 

                             Coming together   

Once the asada was warmed I made a taco topping with onion, cilantro, and cabbage which I made into a slaw type one step topping. (A little S, P, oil and vinegar is implied)

 

The taco

It was very good, but lacking my signature hot sauce the recipe of which I stole off the internet. That stuff makes a taco. I would have used Tapatio on these if I had remembered the hot sauce part but I was hungry and spaced it.

It was so good I made another. And another and another.  Oh ya, I added some chopped jalapenos too.

 

 

After I gave my parents the smoked sirloin my mom asked me to go get her a pack and smoke them for them which of course being a good son I did. Being a good son I also kept back the thickest steak for breakfast. Steak and eggs was in order. I gave it a good overnight fridge salt and then cooked it up.

BREAKFAST!!!111!!

As I cut into the steak to check doneness I flipped the whole plate on the floor since it was too close to the tables edge. It was still ok other than a broken yolk and extra work because I had to wash my dust pan before scooping up and re-plating. One must plow ahead even with floor breakfast. Anyone have CityGirls number?

About The Author

westernsloper

westernsloper

Born to the privileged class what lives in trailer parks, raised in the mountains but left them for the sea. Returned due to lack of finding a better place to live. Excels at self destructive behavior, smoked meats and poorly reasoned arguments in spite of never being wrong.

348 Comments

  1. TARDis

    What is the surface thing? Some kind of stone?

    Looks good though.

      • Gustave Lytton

        The more I look at their products, the more I realize it’s just an outdoor wok. Which is still interesting and looks like it makes tasty food, but hardly a new invention like their hype makes it seem to be.

      • westernsloper

        I didn’t make it although I need to make a few for gifts. A friend gave it to me. Apparently you can pick up old discs at the salvage yard for about 5 bucks. It would work a lot better on a gas burner but my stand alone gas burner needs new hoses that I haven’t got around to changing out.

    • BakedPenguin

      It’s a Meat Stone. To cook meat. For food.

      All it needs now is cilantro.

      • TARDis

        You could just rub a bar of Dove on it.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        That’s only 99.44% pure!
        And. it ain’t love; never mind the 1/4 moisturizer.

    • Rhywun

      ^

  2. Gustave Lytton

    That all looks good. The steaks, the disc, the tacos. Now I’m hungry.

  3. Sean

    Respect.

  4. dbleagle

    Damn, that looks good. It is only lunch time here and I am heading out for a sail I have lamb defrosting and made tzatziki yesterday so that will be dinner after I get home.

    Later this week I’ll make stuffed calamari. Spicy goodness with multiple days of eating.

    • westernsloper

      Stuffed calamari? This sounds interesting.

      • Shpip

        Clean the tubes.
        Chop the tentacles, mix with chopped garlic and ricotta.
        Stuff the mixture into the tubes, leaving a little room for expansion while cooking. Secure with a toothpick.
        Put the prepared tubes into a baking dish, drizzle with white wine, bake @ 375 for 20 minutes or so.
        Substitute pasta sauce of your choice for the white wine.

    • TARDis

      Had lamb too. Sheppard’s Pie. Wife forgot the peas. Contacting a divorce lawyer now.

  5. Sean

    We had prime strips for lunch. So juicy.

    • C. Anacreon

      We’re putting a couple baseball sirloin steaks on the grill in a little while. Mmm. Low carb and dee-lish.

      • C. Anacreon

        In case you were wondering what a baseball sirloin is. One great remote treasure is halfway between LA and SF on Interstate 5, in the absolute middle of nowhere, lies the Harris Ranch. They’ve got a resort and several onsite steak restaurants, plus a butcher shop. We stayed at the resort a few years ago, it’s OK, but best not to be out by the pool when the wind switches direction, because just a few miles north there’s tens of thousands of heads of cattle and giant mounds of their dung.

        But you don’t need to do any of that to get their great steaks at right-off-the-ranch, very low prices for very high end cuts. Any time you’re doing that long drive home, north or south, you can pull off at the gas station across from the resort, and they’ve even got a little butcher stand in there. They’ll pack up as many steaks as you want really nicely iced, no extra charge, so even if it’s another 4-5 hours drive before you get home, they’ll be fine. These baseball sirloins were one of the prizes we brought back from a drive to LA last month. Still have several ribeyes in the freezer to get to later.

        If you don’t want the hassle of driving all the way there, they do have an airstrip for your private plane.

      • Sean

        I was wondering. Put some garlic garlic butter on it and send it.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        Today was my first attempt at garlic butter for the ribeyes. I couldn’t find a clove, so I used garlic powder. We’ll see how it turns out after it’s finished resting.

      • Sean

        It’s not quite the same, but it’ll do in a pinch.

      • blackjack

        I’ve had Harris steaks and they are good. And, I’ve ridden my bike past Coalinga and it stinks pretty good. Not as bad as the area around Tulare on the 99, but still, keep your windows up and a/c on when you drive past. Actually spent some time in Coalinga a few times. Once, I killed my differential on the way home from Frisco and had to wait three days for my brother to bring me enough money to buy a used replacement. Swapped it out in the dirt driveway of the salvage yard. This was ’87 or so. I had my motorcycle in the back and wasn’t about to leave it out there. 1963 Chevy c-10. Good ‘ole days.

      • pan fried wylie

        But you don’t need to do any of that to get their great steaks at right-off-the-ranch, very low prices…

        *cranks UHF knob to next channel*

  6. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Looks good. I’m still getting my appetite back so I’m sure it’s even better than I’m imagining.

  7. westernsloper

    Thanks for digging this out of the wrong place SP. I apologize for being a wordpress idiot. Someday I will figure it out.

    • SP

      Or not.

      But, you are far from the only one. 😉

      Thanks for writing!

  8. CPRM

    Now I’m hungry. Time to start my chopped round steak chili.

  9. Timeloose

    Looks great sloper.

    Sunday is my wife and I’s day of gluttony. Her diet’s cheat day and my Sunday.

    She and I made Moroccan stew for he lunch for the week, I made Gumbo with leftover smoked beef short rib in place of Andue and chicken. It came out really good and will be at least two meals this week.

    Dinner was a TX meal as we should be in Austin this week for Austin City Limits festival. Chicken fried steak, garlic mashed potatoes, and bacon green beans.

    • westernsloper

      Chicken fried steak, garlic mashed potatoes, and bacon green beans.

      Now you are talking.

    • prolefeed

      I thought ACL Fest was cancelled???

      • Ted S.

        It’s being held arthroscopically.

      • Timeloose

        “Dinner was a TX meal as we should be in Austin this week for Austin City Limits festival. “

        We should be there but are not due to the world we live in. So we made TX food instead.

  10. blackjack

    That looks great! I just get strip steak and douse it good with garlic and lime juice, and then give it a coating of ground red chile powder as they’re grilling over open fire. Then mix up some medium cheddar and some jack cheese with sliced green onions and black olives. Then, roast up the tortillas straight on a gas burner, being sure to leave some charring here and there. Add tomatoes and spicy salsa asada from the local carniceria and you’re golden. Yours look delicious and I would eat plenty of them had I been there.

    • westernsloper

      My go to was always flank steak for asada but the price of that has gotten to the point where you may as well buy fillet mignon. I have never tried it with a strip steak. Will do. Thanks.

  11. westernsloper

    This lady has a great twit feed for flushing out Covid BS. The stats put out by the powers are all over the place. In CO you can’t even trust them at all. Some people need to meet some lamp posts over this.

    • Chafed

      You will also enjoy Alex Berenson.

  12. Sean

    What is the surface temp of that disc when you cook on it?

    • westernsloper

      I don’t remember what I had the induction top set at but it was not hot enough or I just didn’t wait long enough. I am impatient and it was my first go with the plow disc. There is a small area making contact with the heat source so not the best burner for the thing, but plenty of space for cooking and keeping stuff warm. As I said above, the gas burner would work better for overall cooking.

  13. Tulip

    That looks delicious!

  14. DEG

    After I smoked the steaks, into the food processor they went for a medium chop. Ya, I am lazy. Or efficient, take your pick.

    I’m OK with it.

    Steak and eggs was in order. I gave it a good overnight fridge salt and then cooked it up.

    Oh yeah.

    Anyone have CityGirls number?

    Sadly, no. I have no women’s phone number.

    From the dead GlibFit thread: SP: I like lilacs but they are taking over. I rescued a herbaceous peony from their clutches. Mojeaux: I’m using a digging bar, which I unfortunately bent. It is still getting the job done. These euphemisms.

  15. Suthenboy

    “To this I added some lime juice, cumin, and fresh chopped cilantro. ”

    “You could just rub a bar of Dove on it.”

    Cilantro doesn’t taste like soap to me, it tastes like stinkbugs. It is truly gag inducing.
    I have discovered something else along with marijuana, cilantro and percil laundry soap that is awful. My wife and her buddies bought some cucumber/lime flavored vodka. Just a sniff of it made me want to retch. She insisted that it tastes better than it smells. She is wrong. Apparently melon rinds have a lot of aldehydes in them. I always found them unpleasant but this liquor had enough in it that I had to spit *gag* and rinse *gag gag* my mouth. It was worse than awful to me but they love it. More for them I guess.

    • Ted S.

      [passes Suthenboy bottle of retsina]

    • westernsloper

      I never knew it tasted awful to some people. I have always loved it.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      There must be several subvariants of the cilantro is disgusting gene out there, it tastes like cat urine to me.

      • Suthenboy

        That is interesting. I wonder if it is variations in genes or variations in brain wiring.
        What is funny is that it always seems to make it taste awful and not the other way round to have it taste good.

        *squints, tugs chin, shakes head knowingly*

        That is a clue that there is something wrong with cilantro.

      • LemonGrenade

        I think it’s just that y’all have a wide variety of the most disgusting non foods you’ve ever eaten. Cat piss? Stink bugs? Soap? Haven’t actually eaten any of them, so I wouldn’t compare them to cilantro, which just has a weirdly pungent smell that seems to force other flavors to try harder, thus making it good.

      • But Enough About My Wild Culinary Fantasies

        I’ve always enjoyed cilantro, but back in the Before Times™ when the spousal unit and I still lived in the Lower Rainland™ of British Columbia, we tried growing cilantro using seed from West Coast Seeds, and it was a wonderful-looking leaf that was incredibly “oily” (for lack of a better term) the “oil” of which made the entire plant absolutely inedible. Never experienced that before.

      • LemonGrenade

        I’ve never heard of that either, weird. Cilantro is one of those things I’ve always just bought from the grocery store because I don’t use that much of it, or all that often, not like basil. A little goes a long way.

      • But Enough About My Wild Culinary Fantasies

        I typically use it dried (fresh is hard to find north of the 49th Parallel in winter), but I’ve had fresh in various Indian restos around town. This stuff was a very unpleasant surprise, a whole ‘nother level of “OMG, this is vile!”

      • SP

        I’m growing it hydroponically indoors for OMWC, along with a raft of other herbs, and lettuces and arugula and cherry tomatoes.

      • Brochettaward

        The amount of effort being put into growing cilantro is the most offensive thing I’ve ever read on this site.

      • SP

        My Mom washed my potty mouth out with soap.

        Didn’t work.

        But it makes it possible for me to identify things that taste just like Ivory soap. Hence, “soapweed.”

    • Hyperion

      “it tastes like stinkbugs”

      Suthen, is it the marijuana that makes you want to eat stinkbugs?

      “lime flavored vodka”

      A friend from a long time ago, back in my total hedonist days, used to take that lime vodka, mix it with coke, and call it motor oil. It no bullshit looks exactly like motor oil. First time I saw him drink a shot of it, calling it motor oil, I actually thought the crazy fucker was drinking actual motor oil. Wouldn’t have put it past that crazy fuck.

      • Suthenboy

        It wasn’t the lime. It was the cucumber. Any farmers here? Explain to everyone what a stink melon is.

      • pan fried wylie

        Stink melon, that’s when you’re gardening and fall on a cucumber, and it lodges right up yer pooper.

      • Sean

        Million to one shot, doc.

      • Suthenboy

        Ha.

        I am not sure what it is….it may be a wild generic melon or it could be from 2 or 3 generations of cucumber/watermelon that have planted themselves and gone back to wild generic melon. They can be found around the edges of cotton/corn/soybean fields. It is about softball sized, perfectly round, green with dark green stripes and grows on a melon vine. They look delicious but are bitter as hell and stink like mad if you cut them open.
        7 year old me learned the hard way. A green persimmon aint got nuthin’ on them.

      • Mojeaux

        Suthen, save a spot on your bench for me. Can’t stand cilantro, licorice/anise, fennel, melon, or cucumber (except pickled). Also, celery. The smell of watermelon makes me want to puke.

        I can tolerate the caraway seeds in rye bread, but that is the sacrifice I make for my delicious reuben sandwiches.

      • TARDis

        MmmReuben.

        Also, you’re weird. I like all those things you hate.

  16. Hyperion

    “Smoked Carne Asada ala Sloper”

    Now with MOAR SOAPWEED!

  17. Aloysious

    Flipped the plate on the floor?

    That’s so me.

  18. Crusty Juggler

    Last Call for Gumshoes

    I thoroughly enjoyed this piece. Also, the author knows what Sharon Stone’s vagina feels like, which is a fun, respectable fact.

  19. Count Potato

    Looks great, because I can just pretend the cilantro is parsley.

  20. DEG

    The Clown Prince says white supremecists targeted him

    Gov. Chris Sununu, who was attacked by white supremacists here for supporting peaceful protests of Black Lives Matter, said he was “disappointed” by President Donald Trump’s initial failure to specifically condemn them during his debate last week against Democratic rival Joe Biden.

    “There were some very negative comments made to me and my office by some of these white supremacist groups that didn’t like how we were talking” about recent local Black Lives Matter events, Sununu said last Thursday.

    • Hyperion

      What… was he in blackface?

    • Suthenboy

      It is amazing to me how many people’s bullshit detector is disabled by personal bias.

      The guy is a lying sack of shit.

    • Rhywun

      At the request of activists, Sununu then expanded his commission to include a Black Lives Matter representative.

      That guy’s pic needs to be in the dictionary next to “useful idiot”.

      Have a more honest look into what Donald actually said. TL;DR version: the media is the enemy, and Donald has a problem with coherency.

      • blackjack

        Donald has a problem with coherency

        Does he? Because he won the presidency with no prior experience or other offices held. Seems like he gets his point across just good enough.

      • Rhywun

        *shrugs*

        I think the idea is that a lot of these GOTCHA’s would go away if he stated things more clearly. I doubt it myself.

      • Suthenboy

        None of it will go away until he starts another war. When he claimed he was going to end all of our foreign meddling the establishment declared war on him. Those wars are their gravy train and they won’t tolerate that.

      • blackjack

        I get it. Talking to my wife about it and she’s all mad he doesn’t do better. I just think his vagueness opens the door for the media to blatantly lie about what he says or didn’t and he ends up the winner. He absolutely has denounced white supremacy ad nauseum. The more they lie, the more he wins.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      “Very negative comments”

      I will not be mocked!

      CWAA

  21. DEG

    New Year’s festival cancelled due to Lil Rona Panic

    First Night State College, the family-friendly New Year’s Eve celebration downtown, will not take place for the first time in 25 years because of public health concerns, organizers announced on Thursday. Instead, festival staff will organize a virtual event called “A December to Remember,” which will take place from late November to late December.

    • Rhywun

      I have a feeling I’m not going want to “remember” this December – or any other month in 2020.

      • Chafed

        Lol. So true.

  22. Sean

    And I won a Gunbroker auction. Yay me.

    • DEG

      What did you win? I recently won two cases of GP-11 and a Mosin-Nagant 28/30.

      • Sean

        12g O/U.

      • DEG

        Nice

  23. DEG

    Pot smell alone can’t justify car search

    A Pennsylvania appeals court reversed a judge’s ruling that state police didn’t have a valid legal reason for searching a car just because it smelled like cannabis, saying she failed to weigh other factors that led to the man’s arrest.

    The state Superior Court agreed with Lehigh County Judge Maria Dantos that the smell of marijuana alone is not enough to give police the right to search a car without a warrant. But the appeals court reversed her decision to suppress evidence in Timothy Barr’s arrest, saying Dantos didn’t take other evidence into account in weighing the legality of the search, The (Allentown) Morning Call reported Friday.

    • Ownbestenemy

      I had to get out off the floor after I just read that and fell out of it.

      • Grumbletarian

        You fell out of the floor??

  24. Ownbestenemy

    That looks fantastic! Looks in freezer….hmmm two cuts of tri-tip….plans next weekend are set.

    Never would have thought to use food processor to give a rough chop though.

    Cilantro, twist of lime, and finely chopped onion ate all that should be on a carne asada taco.

    • Sean

      Good tri-tip is a gift from God.

      • Ownbestenemy

        The explosion of cooking shows has drivin prices of unknown or lessor cuts of meat through the roof.

        Like flank steak, short ribs, wings, etc.

  25. Rhywun

    Sunday Night Football – now with more mushmouth!

    • BakedPenguin

      Philly vs SF – the good news is, one of these teams is going to lose.

      • Rhywun

        The better news is it will be SF.

      • creech

        Did you bet the game?

  26. blackjack

    She don’t look exactly ready to me.

    • Suthenboy

      You have never heard the old joke “If she is old enough to go to the store she is old enough to get bread”?

      That (non) joke always creeped me out.

      “Oh yeah? Keep it zipped because you are old enough to get shot”

      • blackjack

        My mom used to send us to the store with a note pinned to our shirts saying ” Please sell Brent a pack of marlboros and a half pint of VO, thanks.” And they would. And nothing else happened.

      • Ted S.

        The punchline is that blackjack’s real name is not Brent.

      • blackjack

        Nope, that’s my name. It’d be obvious by the bike anyways.

      • Tres Cool

        Welcome Back Kotter. Epstein always had a note signed “Epstein’s Mom”

      • Suthenboy

        My long lost brother…..

      • Ownbestenemy

        Many creepy variations of that (non)joke.

        Grass on the field…old enough to bleed…etc.

        I like your retort though

  27. Rebel Scum
    • Ownbestenemy

      Wow…my wife says its okay, so sorry rebel

    • DEG

      Nice

    • Suthenboy

      Damn, I was going to try and beat you to the punch and propose but the comments are turned off.

    • EvilSheldon

      Ouch. Nothing worse than a malfunction in a man-on-man shoot off.

      Some great shooting there though.

      • Rhywun

        I guess we’re not doing phrasing tonight.

    • Lackadaisical

      The video is sped up.

      • EvilSheldon

        It’s not.

      • Lackadaisical

        It is.

      • CPRM

        The speed is off, but not by much and I don’t think intentionally, I think it’s a codec issue.

      • EvilSheldon

        I’m curious why you think so. I don’t see any sign of it, quick-falling brass or whatever.

  28. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Lol

    This just showed up on an ad I received. They all look so cool and dapper.

    https://microclimate.com/

    • Ownbestenemy

      We are doomed. Sci-fi writers are the modern day prophets

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Nah, just supply and demand at work separating suckers from their sweet, sweet cash. It’s almost unethical to not siphon off their money. Also, I wonder what happens if you fall asleep in one of those things and the battery dies. Do you wake up feeling not so fresh or do you just not wake up?

    • Rebel Scum

      Wtf?

      • Rhywun

        I saw this episode of The Jetsons.

    • CPRM

      Space Hat Helmet!

    • EvilSheldon

      “We know this new world is not ideal, but when it comes to your safety, we believe nothing is too extreme.”

      You know what? I completely agree with you.

      *pulls out knife* Now hold still…

      • CPRM

        THIS is what pops into my head when someone says ‘anything goes’.

  29. pistoffnick

    “…I flipped the whole plate on the floor since it was too close to the tables edge.”

    5 second rule

    In college, I was the social coordinator for our student club. We’d bring in a speaker and serve free pizza afterwards. I walked in carrying 20 boxes of pizza, clipped the door handle with one of the boxes and dropped every box. Two of them came out of their boxes, one of those was upside-down.

    I ate the upside-down one. Whatever doesn’t kill you…

    • Rhywun

      lol perfect

    • Suthenboy

      What’s mine is mine…..

  30. Chipping Pioneer

    How do you keep your food from falling through the axle hole?

    • Suthenboy

      That one is just too slow and right over the plate. It wouldn’t be fair so I am not touching it.

  31. KibbledKristen

    I just et dinner and I’m hungry again

  32. Gustave Lytton

    Woo hoo, my war against “journalists” continues! Got reporter to change a story that repeatedly called non-fire fighters as “civilians”. Reporter blamed the fire officials who used the term. Yeah, they’re civilians too. And why don’t you know this, reporter?

    • Chipping Pioneer

      Nice work!

      Can you get them to stop calling politicians “our leaders”?

      • Suthenboy

        Yes. Replace ‘leaders’ with ‘the hired help’.

    • Suthenboy

      When you were in school did you know any journalism majors?

      I made some good coin holding their hands and tutoring them through what should have been HS level chem and math.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Nope, didn’t know any. J school was at a different university. I’ve seen a couple names from high school end up working for newspapers for a spell though, but none of them were dumb by any measure and they could well have majored in something else. Most successful one ended up as a spokesparasite for regulatory agency. Come to think of it, almost all of the spokesparasites around here are former print or tv people as the industry has shrunk. New names are all just kids.

    • blackjack

      I thought “fire fighter” meant something totally different in Portland?

    • Lackadaisical

      Lol. Good job.

      The one bit of egalitarianism that is actually correct and useful yet so few make use of.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Next up is pushing back against this sudden love affair with public safety outages, aka intentionally turning the power off because there’s a possible danger of starting a fire. You know what else goes out, particularly when it lasts multiple days? The phones and other communications which means can’t call 911 or be called if there actually is a fire and need to evacuate. And cable tv or streaming so don’t don’t what’s going on generally.

      • blackjack

        They do that shit in OR too? I thought it was mostly a function of the fucked up CA scheme of forcing the Utes to spend x percentage of their money on “renewables” and thereby preventing them form maintaining existing power transmission lines. Then, when their held liable for damage, the PUC refuses to let them raise rates, so they mitigate by killing power during wind/heat events. By mitigate, I mean attempt to extort.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Starting this summer due to liability concerns. Thank you PG&E. My co-op, which has really done a very good job of trimming the right of way for years now, did it along with several others.

        Two of the larger Labor Day fires were apparently started by power lines and already the sharks are circling.

      • blackjack

        Yeah, PG&E is one of the majors in Cali too. Socal Edison and maybe some others. I use LADWP, who have started fires, but nowhere to the extent as the others. Our power always works, but people up north and around SD county get the intentional blackouts. We just get threats.

      • blackjack

        I guess they like saving on power sometimes and just export the shitty idea to where else it might be workable. Fucking scum.

      • Gustave Lytton

        PG&E isn’t here, except for some border areas maybe. It’s the court cases they lost/settled/pled guilty with huge monetary and liability implications for all of the utilities here.

  33. Suthenboy

    Well y’all, I have taken a week long break but decided to come back today. The news is worse than I thought. It seems to get worse by the day.

    I am off to bed now. I missed y’all but not the ocean of stupid that is drowning the world.

    • Rhywun

      You did?

      /jk

      I’ve been more scarce myself. Stupid work keeps intruding.

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      we need an article each day that’s a politics free zone. It’s chewing on my psyche.

      • blackjack

        I don’t mind here, because there’s some semblance of reasonableness here. It’s when I go read tweets that my blood boils. It’s scary that these people are so prevalent in that realm, and that the PTB over there are so massively unjust about everything. It’s a bad sign for our country that such a place is so prominent.

  34. Tejicano

    That looks delicious.

    And thank you for the idea to use a food processor. To make a taco filling I have always just cooked meat until it falls apart from the process. It never dawned on me to use our food processor. This will change immediately.

    But, if you are going to cook a whole skirt steak I highly recommend getting a Jaccard (https://www.jaccard.com/product-category/meat-tenderizers/) These can turn any tough meat into a nice, edible texture and also allow the marinade to get in deeper.

    • Rhywun

      Oh… want! Did not know of this sorcery. I have tossed more than one piece of meat that I couldn’t chew.

      • But Enough About My Wild Culinary Fantasies

        Got one of those many years ago — clones are available all over Amazon and eBay. They work really well, but they’re a bitch to clean.

      • Tejicano

        The funny thing is that the holes don’t show up after cooking. These tiny blades pretty much interrupt any gristle or tough spots but don’t change the way the meat looks or cooks unless you really want to go crazy and make hamburger.

        For cleaning I just get the blades a bit soapy then, using both hands, compress the bottom part to expose the blades then run it all under running water. I’ve never let it sit long so I don’t know if it gets harder to clean if it isn’t done right away.

      • db

        are…we not doing “phrasing” anymore?

    • blackjack

      Gonna get Hank Aaron’s baseball bat and tenderize her head!

    • db

      When I do burgers, I grind my own from a combination of sirloin and chuck roast. I use the food processor to chop the meat lightly rather than grind the F out of it. It usually is great and the meat hasn’t been abused by a meat grinder.

    • PieInTheSky

      I thought the issue with meat tenderizer was it made the steaks unsafe to cook rare as it may push bacteria inside… but it may be an exaggerated risk or sear the surface before tenderizing or something.

      • Sean

        I have one. I’ve never used it.

  35. LCDR_Fish

    WTF? My post didn’t show up and when I try and type it again, it says it’s a duplicate of one already posted – that isn’t showing up….

    Old guy music?

  36. db

    This one is being bookmarked for sure. Thanks for this!

  37. R C Dean

    Mmm. Cilantro. In the right dish, it is essential.

    I pity those whose genetics are . . . unfortunate.

    • CPRM

      Evergreen isn’t on the ‘worst’ list?

      • Sir Digby Classic

        They’re just a bunch of pussies, really. A good slapping will get most of them back in line. It’s just that there are very few in that area adept at providing a “good slapping”.

  38. l0b0t

    Thanks, ‘Sloper. This looks yummy. I’m intrigued by the use of a plow-wheel; I’ve cooked on a shovel, but that was just a field expedient solution. I don’t know of any songs that mention plow-wheels but JC has a great one that mentions a plow-line. https://youtu.be/x9rQAwnJfTc

  39. straffinrun

    Excellent. Do your wings next.

    *lo and behold

  40. mrfamous

    I make tacos out of petite sirloins as well, though I generally don’t go through as much effort (I’m only cooking for me). I grill up the sirloins, slice it into bite size chunks. Chop up some cilantro and a lime. Squeeze the lime over the sirloin. Brown up corn tortillas on a cast iron skillet. Fill the tortillas with the sirloin, cilantro and some store bought salsa. Serve with corn (and rice when not cutting, which is almost never).

    Very cheap, very yummy. Still more effort than I normally prefer. The petite sirloins also work good in spinach salads.

  41. CPRM

    I gotta say one thing…I don’t like the texture of corn tortillas, or masa. I usually go with flour tortillas for this one reason. It’s just a texture thing, the taste is fine.

    • Tejicano

      Corn tortillas have to be fried just right. Too much and they are too brittle. Too little and they are too dry and gritty. They need oil and heat – then they come out almost like pastry. A properly fried corn tortilla really adds to the experience.

      • CPRM

        then they come out almost like pastry

        quit trying to make me vomit!

      • CPRM

        I’m not a sweets guy, most of it sets off my gag reflex. But especially bread sweets like pastry.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        ::scratches cupcakes off of trip list::

      • CPRM

        Good. Cupcakes are vile. Once every few years I’ll have a custard filled Long John, then after I’m halfway through feel like I want to vomit because I’d forgotten how vile sweets are. Isn’t it crazy a fat man is saying this? This is 2020!

  42. straffinrun

    Joe Biden somehow convinced people to fight to the death to make him president. The man is a genius.

    • Sir Digby Classic

      Why–did some of his gullibles get killed?

      • straffinrun

        Just reading my green tea leaves.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Ah! Splendid…splendid. Carry on.

    • Brochettaward

      You could insert anyone with (D) past their name in Biden’s position and you’d have the same batshit leftists in the streets larping. They aren’t a party motivated by anything but hate of the other at this point.

      • straffinrun

        You thought my second sentence was sarcasm, but the first one wasn’t?

      • Brochettaward

        As with most interactions I have in my life, I was just wondering why you felt the need to say what you said at all. Like, why? What is the point?

        I should have just called you a homo.

      • straffinrun

        Salty.

    • Chafed

      You are much too generous to him. This is straight up hatred for Trump. Biden is just the vehicle to coalesce the opposition.

  43. PieInTheSky

    Tacos look good that dist on an induction stove setup looks weird.

  44. CPRM

    Now that I’m making more money I decided to give Amazon Prime video a try if for no other reason to watch this season of The Boys without having to find ‘those sites’. Now I’m retroactively upset that The Tick wasn’t renewed. I watched the pilot when it came out and didn’t care for the costume and wasn’t too impressed, but now I went back and watched the show and it got better after the pilot and they fixed the costume by season 2. And now it is no more 🙁

    • Brochettaward

      It’s all your fault.

    • Sir Digby Classic

      Couldn’t watch it without constantly running the animated series through my mind. Although, I do give props for the casting, for the most part.

      • CPRM

        the cartoon isn’t on Prime or Netflix 🙁

      • Sir Digby Classic

        …..This is true. Fortunately, I didn’t take a lot of intoxicants when it was broadcast, so I can remember.

      • CPRM

        Look at Mr. Sober ova hea.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Yup–Mr. Sober 1998.

        How’d you know?

        ::looks around for hidden CPRMSPAN cameras::

      • CPRM

        It’s my job to everything that goes on.

      • CPRM

        *to know

        Damnit!

    • straffinrun

      Don’t know how it works where you are, but I just bought a Firestick and pay for the few Amazon shows I watch.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        How much do they charge for their shows?

      • Chafed

        $20. Same as downtown.

      • straffinrun

        Depends, but usually 300-¥400.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Hmmm….I am going to give them the benefit of the doubt, and presume those costs are the roughly 100:1 exchange rate (give or take).

        That’s for each series, or, per episode?

      • straffinrun

        3-4$. If I answer in dollars, one of you assholes will say, “They use dollars in Japan?!” 🙂

      • straffinrun

        GoT was $2 an episode. That ended up costing a lot. But, I don’t plan on watching any more series.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Yeesh. GoT made some scratch. And, some careers, it would seem.

        I, personally, don’t care about about the linguistic accuracy. But, I do expect you to ‘show your work’ when it comes to the arithmetic….so, get crackin’.

      • straffinrun

        I don’t wanna figure out how much I wasted. I watched the entire series.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        ::sigh::

        Yeah….and, we pay for HoBO.

      • CPRM

        Stop it with this monopoly money!

      • CPRM

        I’m still on the Free Trial month, that will end a couple days after this season of The Boys does, but if I’m finding enough to watch for $12.99/month I might stick around. If they charge $2 per episode or movie, that’s only about 6 a month, which at at the moment I’m watching more than that, but now that I’ve watched all of The Tick and only 1 more episode of The Boys, I’ll have to see what else they have on offer. The free shipping doesn’t move the needle for me, doesn’t seem any faster and when I order stuff I usually order enough to get the free shipping any way.

      • hayeksplosives

        They have some good documentaries, surprisingly enough.

        They don’t try to steer me to woketown like Netflix did.

        I’m planning to watch “The Real Adam Smith” next.

      • CPRM

        There are 2 of them, (Morality and Markets and Ideas That Changed The World) will watch.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Unfortunately, Amazon is really pushing that bullshit voter fraud movie, with Stacey “Don’t look directly at her” Abrams. To wit–Amazon owns Twitch, and has really ramped up the commercials played on streamers’ channels; that being the one I see a nauseating amount of times per day. I’m sure there are other examples.

        But, I also give them credit for daring to show the Atlas Shrugged trilogy. And, I believe, Unplanned (for a small production, it really hits hard).

  45. CPRM

    Digby, just sent you an amusing anecdote.

      • CPRM

        And Done Back, Bitch!

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Yeah–not to belabor the tennis match theme, but, deuce, or grand slam, or, whatever the hell terms they use.

  46. Gustave Lytton

    I don’t see Hat, so ir must be Hair taking Donald on walkabout.

    • CPRM

      This is the ‘walking in the rain “finding himself” moment in the montage’, total Hair move.

      • Gustave Lytton

        While Damn It Feels Good to be a Gangster plays?

      • CPRM

        This is how ‘group’ work should be done.

      • CPRM

        Also, now I feel like if Donald loses I have to work that The Hat’s real name is Jimmy…

      • Sir Digby Classic

        What you did there….was seen. And, makes me weep.

        /SAD!

      • Sir Digby Classic

        I am more impressed with that soundtrack than any other that I know. The Director, lead actor, and writer wrote and performed almost all of the songs.

      • Gdragon

        It’s such a hilarious movie. I think of the scene where they are talking about the political messages in “Booty Juice” every time I hear Cardi B talk.

  47. CPRM

    This is the kind of stuff Adult Swim used to air, when they were funny. (This didn’t air on Adult Swim, but it’s basically what Sealab 2021 was)

    • Sir Digby Classic

      AS wished they had this. They screwed over way too many good productions, just so they could pump up (ahem) content with no discernable point.

    • Gustave Lytton

      I can’t believe this year is 2020 and next year is 2021.

      • CPRM

        Yeah, that hit me after I typed out SeaLab 2021.

    • CPRM
  48. Gustave Lytton

    If someone has asked, I would have said People Under the Stairs was from 1977.

    • CPRM

      1977? That’s lake a 20 year difference. But it was the kind of horror movie that would have come out in the 70s, just came out in the 90s.

    • Sir Digby Classic

      Heh.

      Of course, there are plenty of people out there for whom this particular tack doesn’t work, and we can thank them for pushing the need to step up the force continuum.

  49. Gustave Lytton

    I wish there was some way to keep the president, which ever one it will be, locked up in a suite at Walter Reed for the next four years. Stop terrorizing the rest of the country with those motorcades. Every year they add another vehicle to the lineup.

    • Sir Digby Classic

      Well, if you stay out of major metro areas, it’s probably not an issue. So, get suburban, or, rural, since it seems to be one of those Mountain/Mohammed issues.

      • CPRM

        Yeah, I only saw a presidential motorcade once, and that was when I drove my dad to protest in GB when Obama’s motorcade came through. (I was just the driver, I’m not a protest person, although I had been at two Tea Party protests, but that was to cover them for school projects) Completely unrelated video.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Works until the First Wookiee’s brother becomes the b-ball coach in a small town and she wants to visit.

      • CPRM

        I’ve been meaning to bring this up. The use of ‘Wookie’ is quite racist, because as we all know, the Wookies were based on dogs, BUT were anatomically like Great Apes, so basically you’re calling her a monkey, you fucking racists!

      • CPRM

        Leave the dog out of it! It doesn’t sound as racist then!

  50. Gustave Lytton

    I guess I missed the news from Lafayette yesterday. NFAC really should think about doing some safety and familiarization training before their next outing. That’s twice now.

    • straffinrun

      They really should drop the “Not”.

    • CPRM

      (CNN)A protest organized by a Black paramilitary group and attended by several community groups ended peacefully Saturday in Lafayette, Louisiana, despite the arrest of one person who police say accidentally fired a weapon at the event.

      A leader of the NFAC — the Not F—ing Around Coalition — said the person who accidentally discharged the firearm was not part of their group.”

      Good to know they are a paramilitary group, and nothing scary like a militia.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        That’s because they don’t want to “overthrow” the gubmint. Just to take it over.

      • straffinrun

        The Overton window has been smashed.

      • CPRM

        Makes some money for the glass man.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Bastiat Windows and Doors, since 1850.

      • CPRM

        Ah yes, the age old adage, ‘It’s better to have armed men who wish to rule you than to have armed men who will fight for your right to be left alone’.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        How can you possibly expect people to behave correctly, if you don’t even agree there should be people in charge?!

      • straffinrun

        Alexander Haig is in charge right now.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        I wasn’t asked, “Who’s in charge if the President dies?”!!

      • Gustave Lytton

        Zombie Haig later clarified that he was speaking about specifically about who was in control of Section 30 of Arlington National Cemetery, not the Undead order of succession.

      • straffinrun

        “If Zombie Bush staggers into the Oval Office, I’ll immediately hand over the brain eating duties.”

      • CPRM
      • straffinrun

        Wow. Never realized Batman was AntiFa.

  51. straffinrun

    Gustave, you got me wishing for the impossible: Zombie Trump.

    • CPRM

      In 2020 nothing is impossible.

      • straffinrun

        US escaping this year with fewer restrictions on free people seems impossible.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Free people spread disease, and hurt society’s most vulnerable people. You’re just using dog whistles for your White supremacist followers!

      • straffinrun

        *Looks around* If I have followers, they are damn good at stalking.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        I guess I’m a follower, if you go by time zones…

    • Sir Digby Classic

      He’ll get the classiest brains. The best! You’ll be very impressed.

      • CPRM

        ‘My new brain banged the classiest women, well, not women, it was Jeffery Epstein’s brain, but they were very classy underage broads.’

      • Sir Digby Classic

        I’ll refrain from making a JonBenet comm-SHIT….

      • CPRM

        It’s 2020, we are the least perverted people even at our most lecherous.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Indeed–I believe this will hit pornhub later this year.

      • CPRM

        I know, I watched Big Love a decade ago.

  52. straffinrun

    How about a Freaky Friday remake where Melania and Michelle switch bodies?

    • Sir Digby Classic

      Will it include a line by Obama along the lines of, “I always wanted to fuck Trump”?

      • straffinrun

        It’s a musical and that is the title song.

      • straffinrun

        Oh Calcutta! wardrobe.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Trey seems frighteningly smart in the realms of entertainment and the performing arts. Or, maybe I have a low bar; I dunno.

      • CPRM

        At this point (circa 2000) he sounds like One Of Us, but as South Park has gone down the last 8 years or so, I think he’s grown into the Middle Aged Reactionary mind set, not that I’m judging, but I am.

      • Sir Digby Classic

        I think he’s grown into the Middle Aged Reactionary mind set

        Yup–he’s a parent now. I have no doubt that Somebody Needs To Do Something-itis* has creeped in a bit.

        *Also known as Neil Peart Disease.

      • CPRM

        That’s one of the dumbest fucking arguments my idiot siblings make, after I spent years of my own life raising their kids, ‘You don’t understand! You don’t have kids!’

      • Sir Digby Classic

        Sounds like parents from here need to speak to them.

        Which leads me to explain–between seeing some interviews where he’s interacted with his kids, and his/the show’s disdain for Trump (I get it, to a degree), it does seem he’s going down that road.

    • CPRM

      I’m not sure Milania would like to have a cock.

    • Sir Digby Classic

      Man, that takes me back. To when cultural appropriation was cool!

  53. UnCivilServant

    Morning, Glibs.

    It’s a working from work day, so I gotta get on the road soon.

    • Sir Digby Classic

      “They obviously don’t care about your well-being. You should complain to OSHA/NLRB/whatever alphabet agency will listen. Then, sue ’em good & hard.”

      -Passage from The Grifter’s Bible

    • Sean

      Mornin

      • UnCivilServant

        Well, I’ve been in my cube for a while, I just really have no motivation.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Im sitting in my van with the heater on smoking, Bella sleeping in the passenger seat, waiting for the dawn,

      • UnCivilServant

        You have better companionship. The only other person in the office is the guy who thinks the only setting on a phone is ‘loud speakerphone’.

    • Gender Traitor

      Morning, UCS. I sure hope my work day goes better than Friday. I made almost no progress on my usual month-end and quarter-end tasks because of other people’s issues. My favorite: I got dragged into a search for four missing UPS mailings, and I’m the one who figured out that one of my coworkers had dropped them in a FedEx drop box.

      • UnCivilServant

        What does FedEx do with UPS boxes in their drop box?

        Part of my demotivation is probably connected to the fact that I’m filling in for my supervisor (he’s on vacation) and we’re getting close to the rollout phase of what may be the only thing we get done this year (beyond keeping the lights on). He should be back before go-live, but right now I’m expected to be the guy with all of the information. I’m pretty sure I have it, but it takes me longer to find it because I’ve been more in charge of the keeping the lights on part of our work.

      • Gender Traitor

        I don’t know what FedEx does with UPS boxes in their drop box, but if they return them to the sender, they sure don’t do it quickly.

        Don’t you love it when coworkers expect you to know stuff that isn’t really your bailiwick? I regularly have to squelch rumors to that effect.

      • UnCivilServant

        The problem in my case is that before all state IT got consolidated, I built half the infrastructure for the agency I worked for, so I had a reputation as the guy who knew how everything worked. And sadly, my prediction of the negative impact of the post-consolidation organization have all come to pass. So people still expect me to be able to give them the answer, even if I have no ability to effect the required changes.

  54. Yusef drives a Kia

    Good morning Glibs! Strting my new job this morn, new stuff to learn, and things to keep me out of trouble, and money, yippee!

    • Sir Digby Classic

      Bravo! Good jobbing….jobbering….have fun.

    • Tres Cool

      HEY YUFUS!

      Great to hear. Don’t let them turn you into a MSU fan, k ?

      • Gender Traitor

        Hey! My sister went to Michigan State!

      • Tres Cool

        Dont tell Sloopy.

        Mornin’ home-slice

      • Gender Traitor

        At least it wasn’t TTUN.

        Mornin’, homey.

      • Tres Cool

        I think Im gonna make some spam & AIGS if you’re hungry

      • Gender Traitor

        “From Middle English eyren, alteration of earlier eyre (“eggs”)”

        Jane…Eggs??

      • UnCivilServant

        I hope she knew how to cook eggs.

      • Gender Traitor

        Thanks for the offer, Tres. I don’t think I’ll be ready to eat until after I get to work. I have yogurt, but I know that won’t get me through the morning. I’ll probably end up succumbing to the temptation of Pop Tarts.

    • Gender Traitor

      Best of luck with the new gig!

    • Tejicano

      Good luck Yusef!

      Glad to know some of us around here are imminently employable.

      Glad I’m not one of them.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        In spite of the fact Im old and overqualified,

      • Tejicano

        I’m pretty much both of those for anything I might apply for here but that usually ends up with me being low-balled to the point that I’d rather work at a 7-11, getting paid for every hour on the job, rather than some low salaried position where I’m expected to put in 60+ hours a week.

  55. Yusef drives a Kia

    Thanks kids! As long as I dont do a Jack in the maze Ill be fine

    • Tres Cool

      Is that even a euphemism ?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Tank farm, Winter, hmmmmm,
        And an Orange ade

    • limey

      Congrats, Yusuf. Please explain this phrase for a non-American.

      Morning, all.

      • Gender Traitor

        Morning, limey/JD.

        I don’t know what it means either.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Reference to The Shining I guess? Get lost, lose his mind, etc.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Winner! And a SP reference

      • Tejicano

        (Good) morning (to) all (of you).

      • UnCivilServant

        That’s a suspicious triplicate of parentheticals

      • Tejicano

        Language can be a squirrely thing.

      • Gender Traitor

        Good [insert appropriate time of day], Teji.

      • UnCivilServant

        %%Error, time of day not found%%

        %%Substituting Grievous insult table.%%

      • Tejicano

        Good morning (evening for me) to GT!

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        A tank farm with 9000 tanks lined up, in heavy snow, see below

      • Tejicano

        So, I’m guessing heat applied to increase viscosity? Or prevent freezing?

        What’s in these tanks?

      • UnCivilServant

        I looked below, but nothing’s there.

      • Tejicano

        “but nothing’s there.”

        If there’s nothing there then these must be “tanks for nothing”.

      • UnCivilServant

        Are you sure it isn’t “tanks but no tanks”?

      • Tejicano

        In Japanese there is a word for “thanks” – Kansha – which is pronounced the same as a word for an armored vehicle.

      • Tres Cool

        Abrams ? Bradley ?

    • Tejicano

      Looks like more guns have been sold in 2020 to date than were sold over all pf 2019. And 2019 was far and away the high point in history.

      Of course this is rough measure as this is just the quantity of background checks passed – and you can purchase more than one firearm on each background check. I think I’ve purchased 7 or 8 in a single background check before.

    • Tejicano

      Looks like more guns have been sold in 2020 to date than were sold over all pf 2019. And 2019 was far and away the high point in history.

      Of course this is rough measure as this is just the quantity of background checks passed – and you can purchase more than one firearm on each background check. I think I’ve purchased 7 or 8 in a single background check before.

    • Tejicano

      Looks like more guns have been sold in 2020 to date than were sold over all pf 2019. And 2019 was far and away the high point in history.

      Of course this is rough measure as this is just the quantity of background checks passed – and you can purchase more than one firearm on each background check. I think I’ve purchased 7 or 8 in a single background check before.

    • Tejicano

      Looks like more guns have been sold in 2020 to date than were sold over all pf 2019. And 2019 was far and away the high point in history.

      Of course this is rough measure as this is just the quantity of background checks passed – and you can purchase more than one firearm on each background check. I think I’ve purchased 7 or 8 in a single background check before.

      • Tejicano

        WHOA! Squirrels must be NRA members too!

      • UnCivilServant

        Naw, you just got a quad-barrel shot.

      • Sean

        Nice.

    • TARDis

      You know a lot of those purchased are Commies wanting to kill normies, right?