About The Author

Banjos

Banjos

Wife of sloopy, mother to three bright, curious, and highly active young girls. Perpetually exhausted.

362 Comments

  1. Count Potato

    Good morning, Banjos

  2. Count Potato

    “Michigan judge allows probe of Dominion voting machine.”

    Sounds kinky

    • juris imprudent

      I’m not saying the judge is an alien…

      • Tres Cool

        Like this?

        (the whole clip posits how Barbie’s friend Becky ended up in a wheelchair)

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        This one is funniehttps://youtu.be/6tZar4wRP40r –

  3. Shpip

    Declining enrollment in public schools has some people worried. State funding of public schools is often directly related to the number of students enrolled in these schools. With the recent public school exodus, states like Texas and California have decided to freeze enrollment at pre-pandemic levels to maintain school funding rates.

    Lose the students, keep the money. From a bureaucrat’s prospective, what’s not to like?

    • Pope Jimbo

      At what point though, will even the pols on the teachers’ union dole be forced to change the funding mechanism?

      Pretty soon the squares are going to start asking embarrassing questions about why those tax dollars don’t follow the kids.

      • AlexinCT

        The squares have been complaining for decades and it has only gotten worse, man…

    • rhywun

      some people

      I guess teachers union hacks are people too.

    • banginglc1

      “Hmm . . .we stopped providing the service that everyone has come to expect for the last 100 years, why are people sending their kids elsewhere?”

      Like it or not, our system is currently designed for you to babysit kids. Most middle class people need a dual income to survive the lifestyles they have become accustomed to. So if you stop providing a service our system has set up for them to rely on, they’ll look for something that does support their needs. It’s not that hard.

      • rhywun

        Pretty soon they’ll start wondering why they have to keep paying all those school taxes they’re not using.

      • juris imprudent

        survive the lifestyles

        I am so glad you added that qualifier. Nothing pisses me off more than the goddam mindless consumption oriented idea that “survive” means “consume like a motherfucker”. I swear, prosperity creates worse problems than hardship – because at least in hardship people learn.

      • banginglc1

        there is no such hardships in America. Seriously. Our welfare state makes it so that no one has to ever fully learn the lessons they so desperately need.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        Ahem, some of them do.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Nothing pisses me off more than the goddam mindless consumption oriented idea that “survive” means “consume like a motherfucker”.

        Preach it, brother juris!

        Heck, there is a large subset of middle income folks who don’t realize that they’d actually be better off on a single income, as long as the non-working spouse focuses on tasks that reduce expenses (like cook and clean and mow the lawn and make sure the kids don’t kill themselves)

      • Nephilium

        like cook and clean and mow the lawn and make sure the kids don’t kill themselves

        Seems like that last one would be retaining expenses.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        When I got laid off at 19 while going to college part-time and lived on apples and instant coffee and copious amounts of white sugar for two weeks it sure as fuck “woke” me the fuck up. I was skeletal by the time I swallowed my pride enough to move back to my parent’s home. Never trust a room-mate.

      • banginglc1

        Heck, there is a large subset of middle income folks who don’t realize that they’d actually be better off on a single income

        I hate to say it, and again, like it or not. A lot of lower middle class folks would be better off having one income and going on the dole. Lots of self supporting people could have one spouse quit their job, and be better off. Our current welfare system has nothing to do with needs, Even if you agree with the system, at current levels people are receiving enough benefits to be extremely comfortable.

      • juris imprudent

        Oh no, no, no – I’m not talking about the working poor or people on welfare (which are entirely different sets of people); I’m talking that vast swath of America called the middle-class. Granted, there can’t be poverty in this country based on the amount of money we spend countering poverty; and there isn’t, at least not like poverty historically speaking or contemporaneous around the world.

        It is the middle-class that has the worst case of insatiable need to consume.

      • LemonGrenade

        Yup, we did the math when our first kid was born and when you added in child care expenses, the extra taxes from the double income, etc, we were going to be better off if one of us stayed home with the kids. Which resulted in some scrimping and saving, but also ended up being pretty damn freeing, since we weren’t trying to arrange family vacations around two jobs and school.

  4. Swiss Servator

    “The mystery of the monolith has been solved.”

    • Tejicano

      At first I wanted to believe it was from something outside our usual experience but – because f the way my dad raised me to identify the method used to produce/manufacture every object I see – it was obvious how the Utah sculpture was made which didn’t seem particularly otherworldly.

      • Swiss Servator

        Oh yeah? Explain this!

        CHECKMATE!

      • Pope Jimbo

        Really, really bad Kubrick fan film?

      • Pine_Tree

        Steve unrolled the wrapper from one of his prophylactics?

      • Count Potato

        Maybe try posting smaller pictures though?

      • AlexinCT

        STEVE SMITH: GO BIG, OR (AND) GET RAPED!

      • WTF

        STEVE SMITH READY TO DEMONSTRATE “PAN HANDLE HOOKER”!!!

      • Agent Cooper

        STEVE SMITH HVAC REPAIRMAN!

        Can’t spell REPAIR without RAPE!

    • Atanarjuat

      Be a lot cooler if they left it a mystery rather than attempting to cash in.

  5. l0b0t

    Good morning everyone. NYC schools are open (as far as it goes) today – “All students will follow the schedule for Cohort A, regardless of their assigned Cohort.” My kids go on Tuesdays and Fridays, so today we’re back at the YMCA for their Learning Lab. I am so very much over all this bullshit.

    • rhywun

      Meanwhile the local news is wall-to-wall panic and doom. I doubt open schools last the week.

      • banginglc1

        All the schools here are closed until next year.

      • Tejicano

        My kids have been in school every usual day since June. (Summer vacation here is July and part of August – shorter this year due to the virus)

      • Atanarjuat

        Sorry for not remembering, are you in Canada? Our great all-knowing Minister of Health and Well-Being Fauci said a week ago that it was ok to let kids go to school.

      • Count Potato

        Does CNN still have their stupid graphic that takes up half the screen?

      • rhywun

        Yes. OFFS.

  6. Atanarjuat

    Odious man interviews even more odious man.

  7. Count Potato

    “Rosen also shared an update on the company’s fight against COVID-19 misinformation. He said that between March and October, Facebook has removed more than 12 million pieces of content for sharing dangerous misinformation about the coronavirus. Under Facebook’s rules, the company removes misinformation it says can lead to imminent harm, such as fake cures. Misinformation it considers less dangerous is sent to the company’s fact checkers for debunking. According to Rosen, Facebook has now labeled 167 million posts for coronavirus misinformation.

    The numbers were provided alongside the social network’s latest transparency report, which details Facebook’s content takedowns over a variety of policies. The report revealed new metrics around the company’s work to combat hate speech. Facebook said it removed just over 22 million pieces of content for hate speech during the third quarter of 2020. That number is roughly in line with the 22.5 million takedowns from the previous quarter. But for the first time, the company is also giving more context to these numbers.”

    https://www.engadget.com/facebook-election-misinformation-labels-transparency-report-191037728.html

      • Count Potato

        “In a Facebook post, Dayton wrote that after “twenty years of bachelorhood,” he has married Ana Orke, now Ana Dayton. At 32, she is more than four decades younger than Dayton, who will turn 74 next month.”

        Impressive.

      • Pope Jimbo

        How I wish Biden had tapped ex-Gov Mumbles to have been his running mate. Biden would have looked sharp as a tack after Dayton got finished stumbling through whatever speech he was supposed to give.

    • Tejicano

      I’m just expecting this to wander into the area of banning things like “guns could be used for something positive” – if it hasn’t already. They seem to be motivated to shape how people think to ways they approve more than purely keeping people from spreading demonstrably harmful ideas.

      • Count Potato

        I’m sure the most demonstrably harmful idea, that Facebook should censor demonstrably harmful ideas, isn’t censored.

      • Tejicano

        ” demonstrably harmful idea”

        Yeah, I was thinking about stuff like “petting guinea pigs cures cancer” or similar on-line folklore. But I’m sure that thing which are poisonous for western culture are allowed to thrive there.

      • Charlie Suet

        They don’t try to demonstrate harm or causation at any stage. It’s post hoc ergo propter hoc on a good day. Mostly they don’t even bother showing that any harm has been caused.

        Plus we’re already getting mission creep. The original pretext was protecting the election. That’s quickly expanded to other things, with the likes of USA Toady being used as impartial fact checkers to delete references to that woman with the hammer and sickle hat.

        They’ll delete posts from ordinary nobodies disputing climate change (if they don’t already) without ever showing that they have any impact on anyone or anything. Of posts advocating command economies and posts advocated nuclear power as a solution I bet I know which they’ll see as more pernicious.

    • Agent Cooper

      This is not Facebook’s job. I wish they realized that.

  8. The Late P Brooks

    It’s all easy to laugh at, but the reality is that an alliance between Big Tech and leftist papers to suppress dissent is a deeply sinister thing. The amount of scorn required for this already troubling work to then be outsourced to partisan college kids is incredible.

    Bonk bonk.

    • blackjack

      They did 5 million times what they accuse the Russians of doing in ’16. At lesast.

      • AlexinCT

        When the left accuses anyone of doing something dirty/despicable/criminal, assume it is progjection and they are doing it so they want to smear their opposition with the charge before it comes out they are doing it.

      • Rebel Scum

        When Trump succeeds in defeating the Dem coup they will claim that he led a coup.

      • kbolino

        Even when it isn’t projection today, they’ll turn around and create the inverse image of it tomorrow, regardless of whether it was actually true today. Lots of people seem to love blaming the world for their own problems, making up a narrative of oppression to justify it, and then turning around and becoming an oppressor themselves because of it.

      • sssbobbyr

        Robert Barnes say s with progjection, the accusation is the confession.

  9. Count Potato

    “A month after Lee began her internship, another “fact-checker” in her department declared the Trump campaign used a Nazi eagle in a T-shirt design. Later that day, they issued a “clarification” that “the eagle is a longtime US symbol, too.”Three days later, following a delightful level of public mockery, they “updated” the “fact-check” to “inconclusive” “to reflect further reporting and analysis.””

    In other news, their flag is red, white, and blue.

    • Atanarjuat

      2 out of 3 colors are the same as the Nazi swastika banner.

    • Tejicano

      “In other news, their flag is red, white, and blue.”

      but primarily blue

    • db

      Later that day, they issued a “clarification” that “the eagle is a longtime US symbol, too.

      Just more proof of the basis of the entire USA being in systemic racism. We were Nazis before Nazis were Nazis.

      • DrOtto

        Swastikas are why Asians aren’t lumped in with other minority talking points. They were in on it from the beginning. The internment camps were just a smokescreen.

    • Not Adahn

      Just like Roooshia!

  10. rhywun

    USA Today uses college kids for their “fact checks”.

    Nearly all children nowadays were horrible. What was worst of all was that by means of such organizations as the American education system they were systematically turned into ungovernable little savages, and yet this produced in them no tendency whatever to rebel against the discipline of the Party. On the contrary, they adored the Party and everything connected with it…. All their ferocity was turned outwards, against the enemies of the State, against foreigners, traitors, saboteurs, thought-criminals. It was almost normal for people over thirty to be frightened of their own children.

    • Atanarjuat

      And that’s why the homeschooling article is such good news.

      • robc

        I want to see the numbers post-covid.

        I predicted at the start that this would happen, after being forced to try it out, many parents would stick to homeschooling.

        Then, you started getting the stories about how hard it was and how parents couldn’t wait to send their kids back, and I thought either everyone who would homeschool already was or that it was propaganda to support the schools.

        So now I am waiting to see what the post-covid numbers look like, but I am thinking propaganda.

        At this point, the only chance my daughter will see a public school is if we win a spot in the local charter Montessori. And even then, maybe not. It would save us big bucks over the private one, but depending on timing and a few others things, we might not switch even if we get a spot.

      • mrfamous

        As much as I want to dunk public schools, and they are really bad, I do have to admit that my feelings for private schooling aren’t much better. I feel like the internet and just the massive amount of information available to us at all times makes traditional schooling somewhat outdated, particularly because traditional schooling, by necessity, is most effective in the center of the bell curve and extremely ineffective at the tails.

        _Education_ on the other hand is entirely different thing, and the ability to self-educate is not only greater now than any time in human history, but an extraordinary opportunity for the advancement of all sorts of people that traditional schooling tends to fail (I was one of them). Our structures of course will be extremely slow to adapt, but when it comes to the actual accumulation of knowledge, self-education (with parental assistance) is the future of learning.

        That is provided we don’t get a dark ages brought on by idiotic government and economic policies…

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        IMO, the biggest weaknesses of traditional schooling are:

        1) grouping by age cohort rather than by skill level, subject matter interest, etc.

        2) the size of most traditional schools precludes most non-lecture style learning

        3) they teach to what is measurable, not what will give kids the best opportunity for success

        4) many important skills (networking, self-motivation, etc) are completely neglected

        That said, there are plenty of non-traditional routes out there.

      • robc

        I don’t think you have #1 right either.

        I like the Montessori approach of the 3 year age groups, to intentionally have different skill levels. Older kids helping the younger ones helps reinforce the lessons learned.

    • l0b0t

      I’ve been watching videos from that SerpentZA fellow, and that sounds like his description of modern China. He posits that the Chinese ultra-nationalists are a huge obstacle to any sort of reform or change.

      • rhywun

        Yeah, I’ve read their schools have really ramped up that stuff in the last couple decades. But curiously enough, the media are only interested in criticizing the likes of Hungary, Brazil, and the United States.

      • Tejicano

        It’s not some small sample of Chinese ultra nationalists so much – most Chinese are quite nationalistic if you query them. I would say even more than Americans across the board are nationalistic.

      • kbolino

        The degree to which Chinese nationalism and racism in the PRC has been whitewashed is astounding, but not really surprising when you consider the Western media did the same thing for Stalin. Socialism in one country, The Great Patriotic War, naming yourself Marshal instead of Comrade, creating an imperialist empire across Eastern Europe, dropping multiculturalism and affirmative action, etc. were all excusable because at least it was “socialism”, even though of course as we all know Real Socialism Has Never Been Tried(TM).

    • prolefeed

      Nearly all children nowadays were horrible. What was worst of all was that by means of such organizations as the American education system they were systematically turned into ungovernable little savages, and yet this produced in them no tendency whatever to rebel against the discipline of the Party. On the contrary, they adored the Party and everything connected with it…. All their ferocity was turned outwards, against the enemies of the State, against foreigners, traitors, saboteurs, thought-criminals. It was almost normal for people over thirty to be frightened of their own children.

      Someone ought to write a parody of 1984 where they make minor tweaks like you did, that make it match current events.

      • rhywun

        It’s remarkable how few tweaks are needed.

      • DEG

        Wait, that wasn’t a quote from “1984”?

  11. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Monday Masturbatory Postmodernist Marxists

    Enjoy two utopian assholes mentally jacking off to each others’ wharrgarrrble as they discuss the best way to restructure society in light of postmodernist limitations on knowledge.

    Note that this is pre-Pol Pot Chomsky.

    • Tejicano

      Sometimes I wonder if the tree of liberty should be watered more frequently than we imagine.

    • l0b0t

      I’m gradually coming around to really appreciate the unheeded warnings from the John Birch Society and feel that Buckley’s extirpation of the Birchers from respectable conservatism was (in my 20/20 hindsight) so wrongheaded as to be almost a plot to aid global socialism.

      • juris imprudent

        Water fluoridation?

    • Tundra

      Thaddeus Russell was on Free Man Beyond the Wall last week and had some interesting thoughts on how critics (JBP) of Foucault get it exactly wrong.

      He also rants on the lockdowns and the elections.

      I enjoyed it.

      • Jarflax

        I listened to the debate someone linked here in which he argued for the compatibility of post modernism and libertarianism, I am not familiar enough with Foucault to judge Russell’s argument regarding him fairly, but his defense of Derrida makes me suspect Russell is full of crap. Derrida wasn’t questioning institutions from a libertarian point of view, he was attacking western civilization, including the enlightenment liberal tradition that became libertarianism, from a revolutionary point of view.

      • Tundra

        He was coming at it in terms of skepticism. And mostly from the other side, that to associate the social justice shit with those guys makes no sense, as there is zero skepticism in the Cathedral.

        I don’t know enough about those guys to make a judgement. I do like Russell’s overall willingness to challenge people.

      • Jarflax

        If you view social justice as a goal, I agree that it makes no sense to associate it with post modernism because post modernism denies the concept of justice (and all other truth concepts). But that does not make post modernism compatible with liberty. Post modernism and social justice are both tactics of, not goals in, the revolution. I also found Russell’s debate style to be fairly unprincipled. He avoided direct responses to points made and used mockery and tangential points to keep the other participant off balance. That may be good practice in a political debate, but it is contemptible in an academic debate.

      • Count Potato

        Post modernism does not deny all truth concepts. Foucault was big on “subjugated knowledges”.

      • Jarflax

        I have not read Foucault, Derrida definitely denies all capital T truth.

      • Count Potato

        Derrida also denies his own truth about “truth”.

      • sssbobbyr

        Russel is not as intelligent as he thinks he is.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Not certain about defending Derrida, I’ll have to listen to it, but in general postmodernism and socialism should be wholly incompatible. Socialism posits that society can be perfectly ordered and postmodernism denies the existence of objective reality. Those two ideas cannot reasonably coexist.

        As Stephen Hicks has pointed out, the socialists seem to embrace postmodernism merely as an intellectual means to the end of disrupting society in order to facilitate their preferred change.

      • Count Potato

        Also, the postmodernists were mostly anti-authoritarian. Although that can be used to attack capitalist institutions as well.

      • Jarflax

        As Stephen Hicks has pointed out, the socialists seem to embrace postmodernism merely as an intellectual means to the end of disrupting society in order to facilitate their preferred change.

        Yes, it is used as a tactic, no true socialist is a post modernist. That does not make post modernism benign. Russell portrays post modernism as intellectual humility and radical skepticism but it goes further than that. To deny that flawed human minds will ever achieve true certainty about Truth is a perfectly valid position. To proceed from that to the proposition that Truth does not exist drops you into nihilism.

        I do not think it is compatible as an idea with liberty; it sounds very libertarian to say that we all choose our own truths and judging between them is impossible because there is no Truth only individual truths. The problem is that that means that those who want to enslave others, or control others are simply choosing their own truth and without some Truth to judge against rights go out the window and you end up with nothing but raw power.

        In other words judging slavery as wrong or liberty as right is impossible in a post modernist framework. Now that may not matter as a practical point. After all, even if there is Truth, and it sides with liberty and against slavery, all that means is that the slavers are doing evil. It doesn’t stop them. But it certainly throws a monkey wrench into the gears of libertarianism because it reduces our argument from Liberty is a Good to I’d like some liberty.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Agreed

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Yes, it is used as a tactic, no true socialist is a post modernist.

        This. Postmodernism is used to hollow out and remove tradition and pre-existing moral structures. Then, without a foundation and using whatever remnants of conscience still exist, they build a weak, emotive morality of social justice on top.

      • zwak

        From what I have read of Derrida, he wasn’t so much attacking western civilization as he was attacking the various meanings of language and then building from there. (And it can be taken as one of the most profound bits of thinking, or as silly as that old children’s joke: “when is a door not a door? When it is ajar!

        What others have taken from that in the construction of “Post Modernism” as it stands today has been bastardized with Marxism. This is unsurprising as Marxism is the favorite, simplistic thought process of poorly educated PhD’s that often pass as “thinkers” now. Not all mind you, but enough due to the higher levels of post-secondary schooling.

  12. Swiss Servator

    I need to find a replacement for the Book of Faces. I already bailed on doing any Twitter….just one more to go.

    • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

      Just walk away from Face-Plant if you are able. Hungry aged divorcees and ad content. I pulled the butt-plug about 8 years ago. Do not miss in the slightest. That site is poisonous.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Yup. I bailed in 2015. And I wasn’t a big user before that. I only created an account to develop a few minor FB apps.

        What made me crazy was seeing posts from people who I knew were on the edge of financial ruin posting about their lifestyles of the rich and famous life. I wonder how many of them kept going on fancy vacations and leasing fancy cars were doing so because they were trying to keep up with the Joneses.

      • robc

        I bailed in January of 2008 over election kerfuffles. Friends on both sides were pissing me off.

      • zwak

        It was 2009 for me. I was in the middle of losing everything via the Obamconomy and all the people I grew up with were like “he so dreamy!”

        I couldn’t take it anymore.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Add me to the list of people who bailed (2016 for me) and have never looked back.

        There’s an add-on for most browsers that allows you to clean up Facebook and remove content you don’t like. My final decision to leave was because after tuning the add-on to remove everything I didn’t like (politics, MLM schemes, etc.), I was getting less than ten posts per day on my feed, and those were mostly from 2 or 3 people.

      • Swiss Servator

        A bunch of war buddies use it to keep in touch…only reason I keep it right now. At least I am a passive consumer, I post nothing and react to nothing.

      • Tejicano

        I post nothing and react to nothing.

        Exactly where I am.

        Besides, if/when Space-A starts letting us retirees hop a flight once in a while again FecesBook seems like the primary medium to find out what time AMC flights are arriving/departing.

      • Chipwooder

        Same, plus some extended family. That’s all I use it for. I check it maybe once every two weeks.

      • db

        I stopped using it in 2013 after a bunch of people I thought I knew started calling anyone who had an AR15 a murderer (just post Sandy Hook). I still log in maybe once or twice a year to make sure my account hasn’t been cracked, but I deleted all my photos and videos, and most posts. The account is now just a placeholder. I never missed it one bit. People who need to contact me know how, and the rest can go fuck themselves.

    • l0b0t

      I tried to use it only to keep in contact with distant relations and a few friends. I failed. I kept succumbing to some of my worst impulses with regards to interacting with strangers. Walking away has been very uplifting.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        It was the Step-Daughter calling out an old flame in real time. I didn’t realize what was happening until Katy pipes up – “Stop trying to fuck my Dad, Bitch!” In retrospect, it was pretty funny. Yeah, that was the end of that.

      • l0b0t

        That’s hilarious. Also, your GD bringing you a slice of her appley handiwork was so charming as to warm up the chunk of coal that passes for my heart.

    • robc

      Google Plus?

      Oh yeah, that went away.

      It was far preferable to Facebook, as you had the fine grained control over who saw your posts. They may be evil, but they have some technical skills.

    • Tejicano

      I’m only there to stay in touch with a few relatives and some old friends I haven’t seen in decades. I probably look through it once or twice a month. The only photos that show my face there were posted/linked by people from my old Reserve unit.

    • AlexinCT

      Never did face cunte. I never got a twatter account either, and just followed the few important accounts (like STEVE SMITH!!) by bookmarking links.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      There is no replacing it, just not using it.

    • KOVIDKristen

      I’ve seen a couple people on my Facederp move to MeWe. I only use Facederp to keep in touch with some distant friends that I don’t have contact with outside the Book of the Face.

    • Akira

      Aside from the political idiocy on Facebook, my other big gripe is that it’s the opposite of personal improvement.

      People fill their feeds with these stupid little quotes (the ones that are just a picture of text) which have a collective theme of “everything you think and feel is correct”. For a lot of people, it seems to be a daily diet of validation and approval, and of course there’s no trace of anything that might make you challenge your own mindset and improve yourself.

  13. Pope Jimbo

    Sounds like Minnesoda is going to get a “Panhandle Hooker” next weekend!

    A storm system is brewing in the Pacific Ocean and it could serve as the mechanism that busts Minnesota out of a weather lull in the coming days.

    “That system develops rapidly Thursday night into Friday,” Sundgaard explained Saturday on his Explore with Sven YouTube channel. “Panhandle hooker system coming out of Texas and Oklahoma and then making its way up to Minnesota and Wisconsin Friday into the day Saturday.”

    I’m looking forward to a week of Jr High level sniggering comments about the weather.

    • rhywun

      She’s hitchhiking up there from one truck stop to the next all the way from Oklahoma? That’s dedication.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Oklahoma!?!

        Dang. I thought Florida panhandle.

      • Chipwooder

        Ain’t no hookers like a grungy, diseased, Cervantes Hwy hooker from Pensacola!

      • Pope Jimbo

        We know! That is what we are looking forward to!

      • l0b0t

        A trailer home in Vernon, full of Washington County swingers from the Craigslist personals?

      • juris imprudent

        Expecting Winston’s Mom to offer some scathing putdown of that kind of tramp.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        Ailleen Wornous redux? Duck and cover!

  14. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    Mornin’ Banjos! That’s the last album of theirs that I really liked. Wore out two cassettes in the Chevette! Hope that you and every Glib have a fine day!

  15. Atanarjuat

    https://time.com/5917389/joe-biden-foreign-policy/

    Well, looks like we’re rejoining the Paris Climate Accord and World Health Organization. It’s best to look at things in the long term, but at this point it can be noted that there were a few temporary moves in the direction of liberty.

    • Pope Jimbo

      If we join the Paris deal, doesn’t that mean we can increase our carbon output? Last I heard (and I’m too lazy to enact any labor) we were already beating the goals of the Paris Accord.

      Also, I’m going to guess that because everyone has been hiding at home the carbon footprint of the world shrunk significantly this year. Has anyone asked the “scientists” when we will see the downward blip in the data because of this?

      • rhywun

        No, it means China and India get to increase their carbon output. The West may be meeting whatever the current goal is but future goals will require massive suffering. None of it actionable anyway, so I’m not worried.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Yup. And the USA would have to pay for it. Ie subsidize China’s aims to reengineer the global economic order.

        The Democrats are enemies of America. Change my mind.

      • Q Continuum

        “The Democrats are enemies of the World”

        FIFY.

        They are China’s Neville Chamberlain.

      • AlexinCT

        What it will do is allow the wealthy globalist cabal to rip off the American tax payer while making life for the less well off financially in the US more costly and difficult. These are the people that are willing to lie, cheat, and steal to make sure one of them is in power, but those of us that see them for the criminal syndicate they are, are the bad people according to their propaganda machine….

    • juris imprudent

      Back to the glorious last century!

      • Atanarjuat

        Recommitting to NATO embodies that slogan perfectly.

        Because what I really want is my teen son drafted in a few years to become cannon fodder for maintaining the present borders of Montenegro.

  16. Tundra

    Good morning, Banjos!

    Thanks for the lynx and the pretty little ditty! I can’t believe it’s been more than 30 years since that album came out!

    I think it’s a good thing, no matter what, that Two-Scoops fights this to the end. The more hinky shit that comes out the better. There is no fixing things, of course, but knowing is better than hoping.

    Brennen should be in SuperMax. That is all.

    I hope you all have a great day! Get them before they get you.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Trump should appoint a special prosecutor (Jan 5th would be epic trolling) to investigate the election for electoral fraud. Hang one of those around Biden’s administration just to keep them from getting too carried away.

      • Atanarjuat

        Great idea.

        Dave Smith pointed out that if Biden is inaugurated, Trump not only won’t go, but might hold a competing rally with greater attendence.

        I for one plan on posting “not my president” on all my numbnut fb friends political posts who were dumb or childish enough to use that line during the Trump administration.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Remember the big fucking pissing match in 2017 between Trump and the media about the size of the crowds?

        Yeah, Trump holding his own “Thanks for the Memories” ball/parade would be epic.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    The Bloombergers are ruminating about the impending decline of NYC as the financial center of the universe. Large banks and brokerages are bailing to the hinterlands. Some chick a few minutes ago said many of the low level employees she has talked to WANT to get transferred away from Manhattan. This apparently both surprised and confused her.

  18. Q Continuum

    In the desolate, G-d-forsaken wasteland that is your life, at there are two big squishy things you can count on during your Mammary Monday.

    https://archive.li/hBQTd

    20 seems like a really great way to get ticks in unusual place and 25 isn’t fooling anyone; she can’t read.

    • prolefeed

      #17 FTW. #43 and #60 also super hot.

    • DEG

      #1. Yes to Paige Spiranac

      Good iChive galleries: #3, #7, #30, #40

      #11 – BDSM costume or face diaper? Face diaper. Fuck.

      #14 is cute.

      #17. Yes.

      #22 is a RealDoll.

      I looked through #32’s iChive gallery. Sometimes she has crazy eyes. Sometimes not.

      #39 – Face diaper. Barf.

      #43 is good eye bleach after seeing #39.

      #44 kinda looks like Maitland Ward. Google image search is not helpful.

      I’m tapping out. #48, face diaper. Blech.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        #11 – BDSM costume or face diaper? Face diaper. Fuck.

        I’m choosing to believe she’s just cybergoth.

    • KOVIDKristen

      My life is indeed a barren wasteland, but I just need to look down my shirt to see tits. I need to find an archive of burly, hairy, shirtless men.

      • juris imprudent

        OK FELLOW glibs – time to step up!

      • KOVIDKristen

        Why are so many hairless, tho?????

        Stop doing this to your chests on purpose, guys. Please. I beg of you.

      • prolefeed

        Try the search term “hairy shirtless bears”. That may be closer to your ideal, except for their sexual preferences.

      • rhywun

        Grossly misproportioned isn’t attractive, either.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    Let’s recruit the worst people in America to be in the Ballgag administration. Now they are saying Xavier Becerra for HHS.

    Just as soon as he gets the plague under control, he’ll get busy on the gun violence plague. Woohoo!

    • Pope Jimbo

      I’m actually enjoying the fact that Biden (or the establishment creeps who are running Biden) has been so thoroughly fucking over the progressive wing of the Dems.

      You would have thought the proggies would have learned when the Establishment rigged the primaries for Hilary. Or when they squeezed out everyone in this year’s primaries so Joe could beat Bernie. Christ they might as well be Reason Libertarians for how many times they are sure that the Progressive Moment is upon them only to discover that their mouth is once again full of Dem Establishment cum.

      • Tejicano

        No – really! This time she will hold the football and let you kick it! Trust us!

      • juris imprudent

        Oh man, over at Taibbi’s substack site, there are some that just will not learn that lesson. It’s so much fun pointing out how like the big-L Libertarians they are. The spittle-flecked rage is really something.

  20. Q Continuum

    “Only 26 congressional Republicans acknowledge a Biden victory”

    Doesn’t this sound like something that could be setting up a no-kidding Constitutional crisis? Shouldn’t the “mainstream press” spend, oh I dunno, 30 seconds covering it?

    Rhetorical of course; TPATE (the propagandists are the enemy).

    Which is why, for all their bombthrowing and obvious bias, Brietbart is one of the few outlets doing actual journalism.

    • Tundra

      Biased reporting of a story is still better than censoring the fucking thing.

      • Atanarjuat

        Yeah. For example, the long foreign policy article I posted from Time talks about the state of the world as Biden takes over, with detail on many different regions – but it doesn’t mention the peace deals between Israel and the Arab states.

    • prolefeed

      So 10% of congressional Republicans (and I’m guessing 100% of the Democrats) openly admit they don’t understand how the Electoral College works?

  21. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    Banjo’s – special delivery just for you! https://youtu.be/f3jdbFOidds Thanks for the uplifting links. I’m getting a mite tired of tripping over my lower lip. Hope you like it!

  22. Pope Jimbo

    Uffda! The Rona is ruining everything! Minnesoda ice fishing contests will probably be canceled due to Rona restrictions

    Because of restrictions on large social gatherings aimed at preventing the virus’ spread, organizers of many ice fishing events are considering whether to cancel their contests — or even make them virtual events.

    Tournaments with more than 150 anglers require a permit from the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources. In a typical winter, the DNR issues about 100 permits.

    DNR fisheries program consultant Jon Hansen said the agency has told tournament organizers that COVID-19 restrictions will make issuing those permits difficult.

    Angie Nelson, a committee member with the Brainerd Jaycees, said this winter, organizers decided COVID-19 restrictions would make it difficult to host the event safely.

    “Our ice holes that we pre-drill are 10 feet apart. We knew that the issue wasn’t with the contestants on the ice,” Nelson said. “The issue is with the tents, the weigh-in tent and the ticket tent, and when people gather around the stage. It’s hard to socially distance.”

    I don’t usually participate in these contests. The few I have joined were pretty much just to go drink with your buddies. But this is stupid beyond belief.

    • Tundra

      Stupid, yes.

      Beyond belief? Not even close. Yesterday while I was out for my walk, some dude moved way off the path as I was passing. No mask, and I thought about lunging toward him to see if he’d jump into the water to get away.

      But instead I kept walking, trying not to hate everyone and everything.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Yeah, I have often run into the people that will go off path to make sure they are well out of the 6 foot death zone.

        My wife is one of them. True story, I was out on a morning walk and saw my wife coming towards me (on her own walk) about 1/4 mile away. My eyes are better than hers. She just saw some guy coming and crossed the street to avoid me. When I crossed too, we were close enough that she recognized me and didn’t cross a second time.

        That reminds me, today is Pearl Harbor day. I better go up and “surprise” her with my own re-enactment (dive bombers and torpedoes included).

      • AlexinCT

        HEY NOW!!!

      • Jarflax

        So you are reenacting Japanese aggression with your Korean wife? Let us know how that works out for you.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Worst. Comfort Woman.Ever

      • Chipwooder

        Get this – two weekends ago, we went hiking on a trail off the Blue Ridge Parkway. We passed by a couple coming the opposite direction. They scurried off the trail into the underbrush so they wouldn’t have to be within 4 feet of us for a split second.

        And they were wearing masks! I thought those had a magic forcefield that viruses can’t penetrate.

      • juris imprudent

        If you had been masked up they would’ve been willing to stop and chat, within 6 feet of you, for probably 10-15 minutes. But you presented yourself as the unclean.

    • J. Frank Parnell

      STEVE SMITH NOT CANCEL DRILLING OF ICE HOLES

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Some Frenchy-talking “chef” is on. He thinks NYC fine dining will get back to normal.

    HAHAHAHAHA

    you’re fucked, Pierre. Buy a hot dog cart.

    • Sean

      Buy a hot dog cart.

      Heh.

    • Not Adahn

      He’s probabl;y not wrong. The Right sort of People will have their pastimes uninterrupted. Just ask hairdressers.

      • Chipwooder

        The French Laundry seems to be doing fine, yeah.

  24. Count Potato

    “Lockdown finally looms for Sweden as it suffers more than DOUBLE the number of Covid cases per capita than Britain, Germany or Spain

    After Sweden’s death rate fell to similar levels to Denmark, Norway and Finland over the summer, it is now once again the highest of the four, with 1,000 new deaths recorded in the last month.

    While Sweden is still holding out against full lockdown, its measures during the second wave have more closely resembled those in the rest of Europe, with schools closed, alcohol sales restricted and gatherings limited to eight people.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9025989/Swedens-Covid-infection-rate-soars-Britain-Germany-Spain.html

  25. Rufus the Monocled

    The Democrats were quite devious with the fraud. From what I glean from the evidence provided, they basically skimmed. That is, lotsa little fraudulent acts across the board thus making it hard to prove and easy to dismiss.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    A stickler for details

    Fox News anchor Chris Wallace interrupted Health and Human Services Secretary Alex Azar on Sunday after Azar referred to Joe Biden as “vice president” rather than “president-elect.”

    “We welcome Vice President Biden to the club,” Azar said on “Fox News Sunday.” “Since the middle of April … the president’s guidelines have called for —”

    Before Azar could finish, Wallace interjected, “He’s the president-elect, sir. He’s the president-elect.”

    Such brave.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Such douche

    • AlexinCT

      He is neither. We still have not had the electoral college vote, and the media doesn’t get to make that decision.

    • WTF

      Azar should have replied: “Well, the Electoral College hasn’t voted yet, and the results are under dispute, so he actually is not yet the President Elect.”

    • creech

      Wallace forgot to mention that Joe is married to a DOCTOR.

    • Chipwooder

      I’m torn – on the one hand, few things irritate me as much as calling a politician no longer in office by the honorific of the office – it’s not a fucking hereditary title. When you leave office, the title is supposed to stay, not follow you around for the rest of your life.

      On the other hand, there is no such fucking thing as “the office of the president elect”. It was some bullshit the Obama people cooked up.

  27. Count Potato

    “As COVID-19 cases soar all across the country, Aubrey Plaza revealed that Kristen Stewart contracted the virus on the set of their movie Happiest Season.

    Plaza, 36, appeared on a video conferencing interview on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, to promote her new movie Black Bear.

    She revealed that, while they were filming Happiest Season in Pittsburgh this past February, Stewart was one of many who caught the virus, though Plaza didn’t get it.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-9025509/Aubrey-Plaza-reveals-Kristen-Stewart-got-COVID-19-filming-set-Happiest-Season.html

    Was there even a test then?

    • rhywun

      contracted the virus on the set of their movie

      Uh huh. Unless she was cocooned the entire day except on set, there is no way to prove that.

      • robc

        If “many” working on the movie caught it, its a safe bet. I am sure someone brought it in from off-site, but most probably got it there.

      • Jarflax

        More importantly, why the hell does it matter? Contact tracing might be useful at the very beginning of a new disease to identify locales that it would be useful to quarantine. Once the disease has become endemic it’s pointless to worry about where a particular exposure occurred.

      • Tundra

        Precisely. Also, not dead or in a hospital? GTFOH.

    • Necron 99

      Aubrey Plaza is my spirit animal – fight me.

    • Agent Cooper

      I’d sue Plaza for violating HIPAA.

      • R C Dean

        You’d lose. She’s not subject to HIPAA.

      • R C Dean

        HIPAA only applies to health care providers and third party payers.

  28. Rebel Scum

    Only 26 Congressional Republicans Definitively Acknowledge a Biden Victory

    Being a cuck is not going to save you from the camps.

    • AlexinCT

      These are the people that put up the annoying and stupid lawn signs hoping that will cause the hungry alligator to move on to eat their neighbor first…

      • Jarflax

        I want to post a sign that signals my preferred virtues. I am thinking

        C’mon, get you some.

  29. The Late P Brooks

    But instead I kept walking, trying not to hate everyone and everything.

    “God hates me.”

    “Hate him back. That’s what I do.”

  30. wchipperdove

    I just had a thought. I barely slept last night, so forgive me if I’m not completely coherent.

    COVIDeers tend to dismiss the losses attributed to the lockdowns – businesses closing forever, Grandma dying alone, lonely people committing suicide – rather casually, as if these things were going to happen anyway, because of extenuating circumstances (the businesses were on shaky financial ground anyway, Grandma was already at death’s door, the lonely people were already lonely).

    Aren’t these things sort of ‘comorbidities’ for the not-sick?

    • Count Potato

      Sort of, but that ignores the ethical argument that covid is a “force of nature”, and the lockdowns are force of government.

    • kbolino

      I’ve tried to make some sense of it but the one thing I cannot manage to do is get inside the head of COVID panic Nazis even though most of my professional cohort is among them. The best I can figure is that, for many of them, this is the first real challenge to their personal sense of immortality they’ve had to face, and like children, they can’t face it. I’ve worked jobs where people die from not paying attention, I lost classmates in high school to car accidents, and most of my grandparents have been dead for years. Death is a part of life; we are all going to die; what matters, apart from a belief in the afterlife, is how you spend the time you’ve got; there are better and worse ways to go. Yet fundamentally this seems to challenge lots of people I otherwise respected in ways that they can’t seem to handle. It is the (il)logical end of the mentality that “common sense” government enactment of positive policy (i.e. do-somethingism) is almost always all upside and no downside. Even though they have exactly the same cavalier attitude about suicides, enforced separations, loss of jobs and businesses, etc. as they project onto “COVID deniers”, it doesn’t matter. Their fears are justified, their actions are justified, and the negative consequences mostly fall on other people, who in the play of their own lives just don’t matter.

      • Tundra

        The people I know with the strongest faiths (god, not state) are the least worried about the ‘vid.

        Coincidence?

      • kbolino

        I don’t have strong faith in a higher power; the only prayer that ever resonated with me was the Serenity Prayer. But I still do not see the purpose in panicking and overreacting to this disease. I fear death less than I fear a miserable life.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I fear death less than I fear a miserable life.

        Yup. Stowing my faith for a moment (because of how it reframes the issue), it’s like they never had that internal realization that even people terrified of death have all died. I vividly remember having the realization (at age 10 or so) that even those who I’d deem cowards have died. If they can do it, then why be afraid?

        It’s particularly sad to see the septugenarians and octogenarians who are terrified of dying. What do y’all think is gonna happen sooner than later? Go enjoy life while you can still live it!

      • prolefeed

        I’m still alive and healthy after getting a form of cancer where my odds of surviving 5 years out were in the low single digits. Panicking over something that is a few times deadlier than the common flu – aka, not particularly deadly – seems silly from that perspective.

  31. Pope Jimbo

    What is up with the hate for the Dakotas? Since the spike that hit our region, there has been story after story about how bad the Dakotas are. You’d think that just crossing the border is a death sentence. Our intellectual Frank Bruni at the NY Times sure thinks it is.

    Under normal circumstances, I would have flown to one or both of the Dakotas to write this column, but the whole point is that these aren’t normal circumstances. And I don’t have a death wish.

    Too much? Probably. But how else to convey the proper timbre of outrage, the right pitch of grief, over what happened there? Deep into the coronavirus pandemic, when there was no doubt about the damage that Covid-19 could do, the Dakotas scaled their morbid heights, propelled by denial and defiance. They surged to the top of national rankings of state residents per capita who were hospitalized with Covid-related symptoms or whose recent deaths were linked to it.

    Even after the spike, both of the Dakotas still lag NY in deaths/million. My guess is the hate is because the Dakotas didn’t freak out and lock everything down. Kristi Noem is still not locking things down, how dare she!

    • Pope Jimbo

      Shit he even quoted Jodi Deuring the South Dakota nurse who became a media darling by claiming that she witnessed so many rubes dying because they didn’t believe the virus was real. The nurse who pretty much made it all up, not that CNN is going to fact check her ever.

      The Wired reporting also notes that the same medical center where Huron reportedly works only had six total COVID-19 deaths, the county housing the medical center had seen 22 deaths, and Doering’s county had only seen one death, making the narrative depicted in the CNN interview seem exaggerated and misleading.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Nothing like a hysterical attention whore to get the media rolling.

      • Atanarjuat

        The medical community’s Avenatti.

      • Pope Jimbo

        What was the movie where the guy was a complete impostor? Kept pretending to be things he wasn’t, even did an appendectomy at one point because he was posing as a doctor?

        I wonder how long someone could manage something like that today, but instead of fooling people around them they’d just be CNN “local source” guy. The entire gig would be going to media hot spots and representing yourself as a local expert and telling CNN and the other journalos exactly what they wanted to hear. When the spike in SDak dies down, you’d stop being a local nurse and go to Biden’s inaguration in DC and claim to be a local who got beat up by Trump skin heads. Maybe later move on and claim your granny died because people got together for Christmas.

        I’m pretty sure the non-media would catch up with you pretty quickly, but the “real” media wouldn’t dare look too closely at you because your testimony would be too perfect for them to question its veracity.

      • Chipwooder

        Catch Me If You Can?

      • juris imprudent

        but instead of fooling people around them they’d just be CNN “local source” guy.

        Sort of a reverse Borat.

      • juris imprudent

        Or BP‘s random drunken asshole in SNP. Just need a real-life version of that.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        States are going to peak and valley in cases and deaths no matter what’s done but the self-appointed intelligentsia are going to zero in on the states that refuse to toe the line as a sign of affirmation of coronagod’s wrath.

    • AlexinCT

      That’s a great picture denoting the state of affairs in this country at this time..

  32. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    According to Not Adahn’s scientification for Sagittarius yesterday, the sewer pipes at work will explode on my birthday. Fingers crossed for a gentle ride on Thursday. Apparently geysers are afoot and something came up through the floor on Saturday. Pray for Festus.

    • Not Adahn

      I’m not the one sayiing it, it’s the stars. How could I possibly know more than the stars?

      • banginglc1


        I’m not the one sayiing it, it’s the stars. How could I possibly know more than the stars?

        Correct, none of us know more than Kristen Stewart, Beyonce, and Justin Bieber.

      • l0b0t

        Terrance Howard said it. I believe it. That settles it.

        He continued to love himself by buying scissors, wire, magnets and vast numbers of sheets of plastic. He had a theory. It might seem crazy, it may even be crazy, but a long time ago he’d gotten hold of this notion that one times one doesn’t equal one, but two. He began writing down his logic, in a language of his own devising that he calls Terryology. He wrote forward and backward, with both his right and left hands, sometimes using symbols he made up that look foreign, if not alien, to keep his ideas secret until they could be patented. In 2013, he got married again, to an L.A. restaurateur named Mira Pak, and the two would spend up to 17 hours a day cutting shapes out of the plastic and joining them together into various objects meant to demonstrate not only his one-times-one theory but many others as well.

        Howard backs away from the mirror, returns to the living room. The place is filled with his fantastical plastic assemblages. They bear a similarity to building blocks but the shapes are infinitely more complex, in two dimensions and three, tied together by copper wire or held in place by magnets. There are hemispheres, cubes, tetrahedrons and flighty wings. Some of the objects are as small as mice, others as big as fire hydrants; some are hanging, some free-standing, a few larger ones lit from the inside with LED twinkle stars. They are gorgeous and otherworldly. He has no name for them. They just are. He loves them just as much as he loves himself and his infant son, Qirin, who is sleeping nearby and will one day inherit U.S. patent 20150079872 A1 (“Systems and methods for enhanced building-block applications”), among others.

    • Agent Cooper

      “the sewer pipes at work will explode on my birthday”

      These euphemisms!

  33. Rebel Scum

    Trump campaign attorney Jenna Ellis said results of the investigation could come in 48 hours

    Too late. The AP already called the election for Joe Biden. Robust safeguards help ensure the integrity of elections and results. Or so I am told.

    • Jarflax

      Robust safeguards help ensure the integrity of elections and results.

      A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

    • juris imprudent

      OK, I am curious, why do you think the governor and secretary of state for Georgia are un-concerned? Use of the word “cuck” consigns you to mouth-breather status.

      • kbolino

        Demographic shift in the state of Georgia means they don’t have to care. In a few years they’ll be the next Virginia.

  34. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    It’s Pearl Harbor Day. Cursed Germans…

    • WTF

      No mention or note taken of it on either MSN.com or Google.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I remember the year I was working Tokyo and it was Pearl Harbor Day.

        It was strange to think that all those guys that I enjoyed working with would have been moral enemies if we had all been born earlier. I’m glad we all got to be friends and coworkers.

      • Tejicano

        December 8. 1978 (Pearl Harbor Day + 37 years) – the mortar platoon I was with on Okinawa was on a range firing our mortars when one of the guns was way off target. An 81mm mortar round exploded in a farmer’s field to the right of the area we were supposed to be shooting at. We shut everything down immediately to find out what happened.

        I always wondered if some fool did it on purpose as some weird revenge prank.

    • Nephilium

      You didn’t know about the first war between the states?

      Current rumblings that there may not be a game on Saturday…

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        It’s not gonna be much of a game anyway, what with nobody in the stands and all.

      • juris imprudent

        Michigan has to be able to cover the spread. Maybe.

  35. The Other Kevin

    We finally pulled the trigger and replaced our 6MB DSL connection with 300MB cable. Combined with TV and phone, we are saving $90 a month. To say I am satisfied is an understatement.

    • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

      That’s great!

    • Tres Cool

      You get 4K pr0n finally! Congrats and welcome to 2020!

      • The Other Kevin

        When I click on the music link, the music starts playing immediately. I can also skip to anywhere in a video and it starts playing instead of buffering for 5 minutes. Very strange.

      • Claypoolsreservoir

        Welcome to 2009. The future is upon you.

    • juris imprudent

      One of the few things I miss from San Diego, we had fiber-optic cable to the house. It was awesome, even switched over to VoIP for landline.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    What? They bombed Pearl?

    Think of the lives we’ll save if we just surrender now. Freedom is totally overrated.

  37. Rebel Scum

    Fox News’ Chris Wallace interviews odious man.

    But has Brennan denounced white-supremacy even once?

  38. robc

    Happy birthday Johnny Bench!

    He was one of my favorite’s growing up. He hit a HR in the first MLB game I ever attended. I was given his autobiography as a gift. It had some parts that were wildly inappropriate for my age.

    • Tundra

      He was a hero of mine, too. I was a baseball player as a yute, and stupid enough to catch.

      • robc

        Catching gear is called “The tools of ignorance” for a reason.

      • Tundra

        At first it’s a boredom antidote. As everyone got bigger and stronger, the pain increased exponentially. And back then, the gear was shit. No real protection from a foul tip to the foot/ankle/throat.

        /flashbacks

      • robc

        Bench was one of the first to wear his helmet instead of the baseball cap under his mask. The foul tip off the button hurt too damn bad.

      • Chipwooder

        He was also the innovator of the one-armed catching style, with his throwing hand behind his back.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        More than a few lost toe-nails. we didn’t have hard capped shoes back then. The tools of ignorance is spot-on. Most fun position on the field aside from all the pain and injury.

    • Chipwooder

      I had a few baseball autobiographies as a kid – Reggie Jackson, Mickey Mantle, Tommy Lasorda – but none of them were too bad. Graig Nettles’ Balls, on the other hand, someone definitely should not have bought that for me.

      Tundra, I was a catcher too. Loved it! I was actually a better second baseman than catcher, but I preferred catcher because it was never dull. You’re in on every single pitch.

      • pistoffnick

        Third base, but I was second string. Mike Schmitt was better and had the same name as the Hall of Fame third baseman for the Phillies.

  39. The Late P Brooks

    DOOOOOOOOM

    The world just experienced its hottest November on record while Europe had its warmest fall, according to an alarming report from the European Union’s Copernicus Climate Change Service.
    Temperatures were most elevated in a large region across northern Europe, Siberia and the Arctic Ocean, where sea ice was at the second lowest level ever seen in November.
    The United States, South America, southern Africa, the Tibetan Plateau, eastern Antarctica and most of Australia also saw temperatures well above average.
    Globally, November was almost 0.8 degrees Celsius (33.4 Fahrenheit) above the average for 1981-2010, and 0.1C (32.2F) higher than last year. And this unusual heat comes despite the cooling effect of La Niña.

    ——-

    Buontempo said policymakers who prioritize mitigating climate risks “should see these records as alarm bells” and think more seriously than ever how to best comply with the 2015 Paris Agreement.

    The US pulled out of the Paris accord last month, with President Donald Trump claiming it was “designed to kill the American economy,” but President-elect Joe Biden has promised to reenter the pact after he is sworn in.

    Ballgag Joe will save us. All we need is a scrap of paper, and everything will be just as it was before.

    • Nephilium

      Interesting that this happens the same year where travel and production were both shut down for most of it. Wouldn’t that reduction in CO2 have saved us?

      • WTF

        Well, the tiny fraction of CO2 that is put into the atmosphere isn’t really the driving factor for climate anyway, sooo……..

      • grrizzly

        The number of countries I visited in 2019: 14
        In 2020: 1

      • KOVIDKristen

        I got my new passport (had been expired for about 15 years) just in time for the world to shut down * sobbing *

      • Tundra

        I had to cancel Prague in April. Supposed to go to Turks at the end of the month. Not holding my breath.

      • Not Adahn

        No Prague ’cause Plague?

      • Nephilium

        Last year at this time, the girlfriend and I were deciding which hotels and where we wanted to stay for a trip that got cancelled.

        This year, we haven’t even really discussed planning it for the summer. Will international travel be opened back up? Will restaurants and bars be open to the public? Will tourism be worth doing, or will everything still be closed?

      • KOVIDKristen

        That’s the thing – you can’t plan anything.

        Also, I fear flight & hotel prices once things do open. So, you need to strike a balance between risking planning something and getting a good deal, and waiting and prices being out of reach.

        Everything sucks.

    • WTF

      I wish Buontempo would explain how cutting America’s already-low emissions will help the climate while China, India, and Brazil continue to increase their emissions, which are already several times in excess of America’s.

      • KOVIDKristen

        ^This

    • Rebel Scum

      It’s snowing in central VA right now.

      The world just experienced its hottest November on record

      A record that is not even a geological blink of an eye.

      President-elect Joe Biden has promised to reenter the pact after he is sworn in.

      Fixed. And perhaps congress can weigh in on the matter, you know, like the constitution says.

      • Chipwooder

        Definitely wasn’t expecting the snow this morning. Already melted, though it’s still coming down.

  40. The Other Kevin

    I got some good news this weekend. One of my teammates found an outdoor rink where we can practice. His mother in law (a saint if I ever met one) knows the rink manager and got us ice time for free. It’s in Illinois no less. The whole world is not insane and there are still good people out there.

  41. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    G.D.#1 was over for an overnight visit and apparently she and Judi both cried some when she had to go home this afternoon. Poor little Dog has been pining for her and slept on the pillow that she used. Namesake cat has been wandering about, yowling. She’s a cool little chick but I foresee some trouble down the road. 12 going on 16. Payback for her Mom’s behavior as a teen.

    • Not Adahn

      The gf’s dog would steal one of my shirts out of the hamper and hide it in her crate to take home at the end of their visits.

  42. Rebel Scum

    Chris, you lying hack.

    Wallace asked, “If President Trump had worn a mask then and urged everyone to wear a mask then, back in April, the way Joe Biden is right now, wouldn’t we be in much better shape?”

    Azar said, “We welcome Vice President Biden to the club. Since the middle of April, the president’s guidelines have called for …”

    Wallace interjected, “He’s the president-elect, sir. He’s the president-elect.”

    • Count Potato

      “Wallace asked, “If President Trump had worn a mask then and urged everyone to wear a mask then, back in April, the way Joe Biden is right now, wouldn’t we be in much better shape?””

      No.

      • EvilSheldon

        Fuck. Show some balls for once in your life, Azar. It’s not like you won’t be job hunting come January anyway…

        “It has been amply demonstrated that wearing or not wearing a mask has little or no effect on SARS-CoV2 transmission. Here are a few of the dozens of studies supporting this. The entire mask-wearing trend is nothing but public health theater for hysterical hypochondriacs.”

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      What was Fauci saying about masks at the time?

  43. The Late P Brooks

    The World Meteorological Organization’s (WMO) annual climate report last week said 2020 was on course to be one of the three warmest years on record, just after 2016 and 2019.
    The WMO said average global temperature was about 1.2 degrees Celsius above pre-industrial levels. Global temperatures must be kept from rising above 1.5 degrees Celsius on those levels to avoid major impacts on the climate, the United Nations’ Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) has said.

    Thus sayeth the Holy Model.

    Let none dispute, on pain of death.

  44. KOVIDKristen

    I’m on my last roll of TP that I ordered from an office supply store in desperation back in April. Godspeed, Angel Soft Commercial Asswipe. You served me well.

    • pistoffnick

      I am convinced that the ladies in my family have toilet paper puppet shows or make oven mitts the way they go through toilet paper…

      • banginglc1

        *nods head in agreement*

        When I was single I cold buy a six pack and it would last 6 months. Granted, I poop at work too, so I do use more than I buy.

      • KOVIDKristen

        It’s called menstruation. Would you like more details? Because I can give you alllllll the gory details.

      • banginglc1

        I’ve lived through this many SF stories . . . there is nothing you can say that I can’t handle.

        Seriously, he’s talked about Hillary’s Vagina, nothing can be more disturbing.

      • EvilSheldon

        Hoo-boy, I can’t wait to click on that link!

      • KOVIDKristen

        Also, we wipe even when it’s just pee.

        So, yeah – math.

  45. Rebel Scum

    Chicoms tryna conquer the moon.

    A Chinese spacecraft departed from the moon on Thursday, leaving behind a sign of its trip on the lunar surface.

    Hua Chuying, China’s foreign ministry spokesperson, tweeted images of the nation’s flag planted on the moon, while wishing the Chang’e 5 ship a safe journey back.

    Chang’e 5’s unmanned mission was the latest in a series that comprises the Chinese Lunar Exploration Program. Departing with a load of lunar rocks, the mission represented the first time a spacecraft tried to return moon samples since the Soviet Union did it in the 1970s.

    • Atanarjuat

      China: as technologically advanced as the Soviet Union was 50 years ago. Kind of a weird propaganda victory.

    • Count Potato

      SPACE FORCE!

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Armchair generalisimo fights the Big War

    Fox News anchor Chris Wallace suggested that the response from President Donald Trump’s administration to the COVID-19 pandemic has been “a massive failure” as he interviewed the president’s Secretary of Health and Human Services Alex Azar on Sunday.

    Trump has repeatedly downplayed the seriousness of the novel coronavirus pandemic and been dismissive of masks, which help curb the spread of new infections. The president has flouted social distancing guidelines, holding large crowded events and rallies indoors with many attendees foregoing masks.

    Meanwhile, the pandemic is surging nationwide as the U.S. continues to have the highest number of infections and deaths of any country. As of the early afternoon on Sunday, the U.S. has confirmed more than 14.6 million infections and over 281,000 deaths since the outbreak began here in January. More than 101,000 Americans are currently hospitalized as the U.S. adds an average of more than 190,000 new infections per day and an average of over 2,100 people die daily.

    During an interview with Azar on Fox News Sunday, Wallace pointed to the surge in new infections, hospitalizations and deaths, as well as a recent remarks from Centers for Disease Control and Prevention director Robert Redfield warning that the coming months could be the “most difficult time in the public health history of this nation.”

    “Secretary Azar, isn’t this the result of a massive failure by President Trump and his administration?” Wallace asked Azar.

    Tell us, Chris, what you would have done differently. Be specific, provide hard evidence, and show your work.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      If the US was the only nation where this has been an issue he’d have a point but our death rate isn’t any higher than much of Western Europe and that’s with a very loose classification of what constitutes a covid death. As for the total number of deaths, of course it’ll be fairly high, we’re third in population behind China and India for fuck’s sake.

      • kbolino

        The Americas have it somewhat worse than Europe, and both of those regions have it much worse than anywhere else, with the Near East at least showing up on a graph that contains our region, whereas Africa and the Far East are basically flat lines in terms of cases and deaths comparatively. The United States is the most populous country of the most heavily affected region, but as far as the media is concerned Canada doesn’t even exist, never mind the rest of the Western hemisphere.

        Looking at the full data, one might become so misinformed as to think the grossly disproportionate experience of this disease across the world has more to do with culture, genetics, or history (e.g. of SARS and related diseases) than it does with government policy, and that would just be heretical.

    • juris imprudent

      Really. Failure compared to which countries around the world?

      And the minute he mentions New Zealand – “oh, you mean close the borders to travelers from infected areas? Like President Trump proposed? How did you and everyone else in the media react to that?”

      • Chipwooder

        Same thing with Australia – imagine that, an island nation way out in the middle of the ocean that closes its borders is controlling viral spread better! It’s miraculous.

      • Pope Jimbo

        It would be funny if the US jacked up the prices on the vaccine to countries like NZ and Australia. “Sorry dude, we are just trying to recover some of the costs of Operation Warp Speed. Seems only right you pay a bit extra for the vaccine to help with the equity thing”

      • Raven Nation

        NZ: cops will follow you if they see your car out a second time in the same day; you will be arrested if you leave a quarantine hotel even to go for a walk; there will be checkpoints on major highways into Auckland to make sure only residents return to the city during lockdowns.

        Also, Chris: do you plan to build canals to separate us from Mexico and Canada?

    • Rebel Scum

      repeatedly downplayed the seriousness

      I am 99.7% sure that it is 0.3% serious.

    • rhywun

      Christ, what a pathetic hack.

  47. The Late P Brooks

    12 going on 16.

    Ruh-roh.

  48. Rebel Scum

    Thank the judge for his opinion and tell him to fuck off.

    A federal judge put the final nail in the coffin of the Trump administration’s efforts to end the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) program when he ordered the Obama-era program fully restored and DHS to publish a public notice by Monday saying it would accept new applicants. …

    Garaufis’s ruling centered around a memo acting Homeland Security secretary Chad Wolf issued in July that curtailed DACA recipients’ work permits to a year and banned new applicants. The court ruled last month that Wolf had ascended to the post in violation of the Homeland Security Act of 2002, and said Friday that the memo was void. The order mandates the White House administer DACA under the guidelines that were in place when the program was first created during the Obama administration.

    “The court believes that these additional remedies are reasonable,” Garaufis wrote. “Indeed, the Government has assured the court that a public notice along the lines described is forthcoming.”

    • juris imprudent

      I’m sorry, is there not ACTUAL FUCKING LAW, PASSED BY CONGRESS on this topic?

      • Jarflax

        You can’t really predict timelines on new tech when radical breakthroughs are involved. Fusion power is not currently possible, but when I was born even the most radical predictions about computing, even science fiction writers deliberately over the top predictions about speed, size, cost, amount of data possible to store locally, connectivity etc., fell many orders of magnitude short of our current state of the art.

      • Jarflax

        How the hell did I put this here?

      • Rebel Scum

        That’s what she said.

      • juris imprudent

        Gilmore’d?

  49. Scruffy Nerfherder

    *the face you make when the engine troubleshooting manual is 400 pages long*

    • Count Potato

      Blame the government.

      • LJW

        How many pages are government mandated warnings?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Half of it concerns the electronics on the emissions controls.

  50. CPRM

    I always just assumed bowling balls were just a solid ball, but I guess not.

    • Timeloose

      That is great. Starts off straight then goes wacko.

      “Just because you are unique, doesn’t mean you are useful”

    • mrfamous

      We’ve been 30 years away from fusion technology for 40 years now.

      • juris imprudent

        We’ve said that about AI as well, that seems to be making some progress now.

      • Not Adahn

        The only reason why fusion is self-sustaining in stars is that they are taking advantage of gravity which is a third of a billion times higher than on earth.

        Some things can’t be engineered away.

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      I had an internship at the Department of Energy in the late 80s. The goal was to have fusion by 2000.

      • Idle Hands

        Fusion sounds like the perfect gov project.

  51. The Late P Brooks

    Mysteries of the universe

    “Our short-term markets don’t seem to be able to function without a very significant government backstop. We need to fix it,” said Jeremy Kress, a University of Michigan professor who researches financial regulation.

    That won’t be easy, because regulators and experts don’t seem to know exactly why this corner of the financial market keeps breaking down.
    “There is still so much we don’t know about these markets and how they work,” said Kress. “That’s a big part of the problem,”

    Don’t let that stop you from trying to “fix” it. You’re TOP MEN.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It’s a complete puzzle why when confidence falls, people stop lending.

      Ruled by morons.

    • Raven Nation

      “the financial market keeps breaking down”

      Does this: “I think this corner of the financial market keeps breaking down” mean: “I’ve decided what a group of companies should do, and when they don’t do it, it constitutes a market failure”?

      If so, sorry dude, but the world doesn’t often conform to your theories.

      I mean, I assume that the KU football team would play competitive football. The fact that they’ve won three games in two years doesn’t mean the rules of college football should be changed.

    • juris imprudent

      Don’t let that stop you from trying to “fix” it. You’re TOP MEN.

      Harvard Law and Kennedy School of Government, he’s double-smaht.

  52. The Late P Brooks

    *the face you make when the engine troubleshooting manual is 400 pages long*

    Fuel, air, spark. What’s so hard about that?

    *laughs maniacally*

    • Kwihn T. Senshel

      The name of the real estate agent for that?

      Shelly Belzer Shmelzer

      I thought it was a Bee advert or something.

    • juris imprudent

      That is the most awesomely random link!

  53. CPRM

    This bit made me think of Not Adahn.

    • Not Adahn

      Lol. I’mma forward that.

  54. Count Potato

    “The New Yorker’s @SteveCollNY
    suggests Mark Zuckerberg’s “profound” support of free speech is problematic: “Those of us in journalism have to come to terms with the fact that free speech, a principle that we hold sacred, is being weaponized against the principles of journalism.””

    https://twitter.com/tomselliott/status/1335926863517069315

    What?

    • EvilSheldon

      Translation – “Like with everything else, we only care about *OUR* rights.”

  55. The Late P Brooks

    On a whim, I looked up laboratory flasks. You know, something different to use in the kitchen for boiling water, or whatever.

    Holy mackerel. That stuff’s expensive.

    Plague-driven shortage, or just always incredibly pricey?

    • Timeloose

      I see a 20$ 2L beaker? Are you looking at Erlenmeyer flasks, they are bout 2X the beakers.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      Lab-supply companies up-charge products since their typical b2b customer is flush with gov grants or, for private companies, basic supply costs are a minor dent in the R&D budget.

      You could try a homeschool supply store where the customer is retail. I’ve seen much more reasonable prices there for basic science equipment.

  56. The Late P Brooks

    “Those of us in journalism have to come to terms with the fact that free speech, a principle that we hold sacred, is being weaponized against the principles of journalism.”

    FREEDOM IS SLAVERY

    IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

  57. Rebel Scum

    Doom. Gloom. Terror. Darkness. Orange Mane Bad.

    Donald Trump’s denial during his final days in office is darkening America’s winter of sickness and death, damaging democracy, hampering Joe Biden’s nascent presidency and jeopardizing Republican hopes of clinging to the Senate.

    The President’s dereliction of duty as a pandemic that has never been worse rages out of control is depriving America of sorely needed leadership from its most powerful voice. The scale of the crisis with death rates and hospitalizations soaring was further underscored Sunday after it emerged that Trump’s lawyer Rudy Giuliani has Covid-19.

    The former New York mayor has been criss-crossing the country, making baseless claims that Democrats stole the election, often flouting mask wearing and social distancing protocols suggested by the President’s own government. After news broke that Giuliani is in Georgetown University Hospital, his son Andrew, who works in the White House, tweeted that his father was resting and feeling well.

    Trump took his fantastical falsehoods about the election to new heights during an untamed rally for two Georgia Senate runoff Republican candidates Saturday night, at which he spent most of his time making untrue claims he actually beat Biden and predicted he would get the result of the election overturned.

    Baseless, except for all of the evidence that said claims are based on.

    • Rebel Scum

      Orange Man*, even.

    • creech

      He sure is doing nothing to lull Georgia Democrats to sleep. Should his mouth cost the GOP the Senate, Trump’s 2024 chances will be a lot dimmer.
      And we will be perpetually saddled with four new senators from D.C. and Puerto Rico.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I don’t know. He seems to be the only big time GOP person telling GA GOP voters that they should still show up at the polls and vote because the GOP needs to keep the Senate.

        The rest of the GOP seems to be fine with the “Stay Home the System is Rigged” theme that is going around GA GOP voters. The Senate must be terrified of being in the majority and having to take a stand on issues.

      • prolefeed

        Not seeing how anything Trump can say here is gonna affect the GA Senate runoffs. It’s not like people don’t understand what’s at stake.

        Puerto Rico has repeatedly voted against statehood. Pretty sure you can’t force them into the union without first winning a statehood vote.

      • Agent Cooper

        Puerto Rico may also not be as reliably D as some think.

  58. The Late P Brooks

    Back to the “breakdown” of the money market:

    Companies, local governments and market players rely on this funding to function. When it dries up, it can become difficult for companies and everyday Americans to borrow money.

    Money market funds are significant buyers of a short-term form of debt known as commercial paper. But in March as markets cratered on recession fears, these funds stepped away from the commercial paper market, causing it to be “severely disrupted,” according to FSOC. Borrowing rates reached levels unseen since 2008.

    “Many firms reportedly were unable to issue CP or to only issue at a very high yield,” FSOC said.

    They want YIELD? How dare they? If they deserved to make money from their evil usury, the Federal Reserve wouldn’t be keeping interest rates at zero (or less). They should be glad that they are given permission to buy zombie paper.

    • creech

      So they issued corp. paper at ever higher yields? Haven’t noticed Vanguard’s Money Market yield going up. Even if the money markets stuck to very conservative paper, investors should see the m.m. yields going up.

  59. DEG

    Georgia State Legislators are introducing a petition to call a Special Session on December 8, 2020. The session would be meant to review the election results and alleged fraud. The petition must be signed by three-fifths of the members of each house. The lawmakers must also give a copy to the secretary of state.

    They gotta move fast. Tomorrow is the last day to resolve controversies over the vote. The Electoral College votes on Dec. 14th.

    Prediction: They won’t move fast enough.

    The letter, signed by 64 Republican legislators and sent to Pennsylvanian members of Congress on Friday, outlined several ways in which they believe Gov. Tom Wolf and others “undermined” election safeguards that give the public confidence in the results.

    Won’t matter. In order to challenge Electoral College votes, you need a Senator and Representative to sign a form stating the objection to a particular state’s votes. I think they can pull this off. Then, the Senate and House go off into their own chambers to debate the objection. If, by majority vote of both Senate and House the objection is sustained, then the electoral votes are tossed. The Democrat controlled House won’t vote to toss anything in support of Biden, so they’ll fail here.

    • juris imprudent

      I’m still not buying the specific allegations of PA fraud – centered on Philly. If Biden had 200-300K votes in Philly and Pitts counties (above expected), and no other good results across the state, that would be plausible. But he didn’t do THAT much better than Obama or Clinton in Philly, and Alleghany county was maybe 50K votes better. Biden’s win came from votes in PA outside of those areas, which would have to mean massively widespread shenanigans – and that doesn’t seem likely.

      • Urthona

        Because they don’t make sense:

        But might as well throw everything at the wall and see what sticks.

        also there are things we need to get ironed out regardless of who won. no poll watcher should ever be blocked or harassed. we need stricter laws to ensure that.

        we need to iron out how we cure and validate ballots.

      • R C Dean

        Mostly, we need to do away with mail-in balloting. Absentee (picked up in person after showind ID) or go to the polls. Mail-in balloting is a festival of broken chains of custody and is ripe for fraud.

        We also need to require open-source code on all vote counting systems. I dunno if there were shenanigans at the vote counting software level, but let’s not even have it out there as a potential issue.

        All vote counting locations should be under 24 hour video surveillance, no blind spots, with the video fed to public sites so anyone can watch it.

        That’s a start. There’s more we can do to secure our elections (if that matters, and in the long run, I’m not sure how much it really does).

      • Tundra

        +1 purple fingerprint.

      • Urthona

        agreed but we are not gonna succeed in winning the mail in ballot wars i think.

      • Homple

        I’m sure it was all on the up-and-up, just like the Russian Collusion investigation: reasonable people doing reasonable things given the evidence available to them.

  60. DEG

    I’m surprised the Nashua Telegraph ran this story

    They’ve been into the Lil Rona Panic, and this article is somewhat critical of remote learning.

    The activism of Jennifer Dale began when she watched her third grade daughter struggle with distance learning, kicking and screaming through her online classes.

    The mother of three initially sent emails to her local school officials with videos of the disastrous school days for her middle daughter, Lizzie, who has Down syndrome. Over time, she connected with other parents and joined several protests calling for school buildings to reopen.

    Now she helps organize events and has become a voice for what has become a statewide movement of parents calling for children to return to school in Oregon, one of only a handful of states that has required at least a partial closure of schools as long as local coronavirus infections remain above certain levels.

    “This just isn’t plausible anymore. It’s not fair to the kids, who I am afraid aren’t getting an adequate education,” Dale said during an interview at her home in Lake Oswego as she juggled her work and helping her children who are distance learning. “Something needs to change. It is not working, and our kids are the sacrifices.”

  61. The Late P Brooks

    You could try a homeschool supply store where the customer is retail. I’ve seen much more reasonable prices there for basic science equipment.

    Thx. a quick look at Grainger was eyepopping.

    • Idle Hands

      Grainger is the most expensive supply house for a reason. IF you need something today go to grainger if you don’t shop around.

  62. DEG

    Pedestrian deaths up during Lil Rona Panic

    The number of pedestrians killed by motor vehicles in 2020 to date is nearly double last year’s toll — another apparent side effect of the pandemic, safety experts say.

    So far this year, 15 people have been struck and killed by motor vehicles, including a 29-year-old Littleton woman who was hit by a pickup truck while crossing a street in Tilton last week. In 2019, eight pedestrians were killed by vehicles.

    Jennifer Tramp, public information officer for the Department of Safety’s Office of Highway Safety, said the spike in pedestrian deaths appears linked to the public health emergency. After the state lockdown orders were issued last March, she said, “We did see a lot of people outside, walking through residential neighborhoods and in areas you wouldn’t necessarily see them, on the side of busy roads.”

    “People are trying to get outside,” she said.

    But something else is going on as well, Tramp said: reckless driving. “More people since COVID have taken advantage of less vehicle volume on the roads and are taking more liberties, like speeding, impaired driving and driving unrestrained,” she said.

    • Urthona

      This is a hilariously retarded concern.

      • CPRM

        and driving unrestrained

        ‘It’s simple ‘mam. He ran over your daughter because he wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.’

      • Pope Jimbo

        If he had take just a bit longer to fasten his seat belt, he wouldn’t have been driving through that crosswalk at that exact instant. Simple physics you science denier!

    • Pope Jimbo

      So LA was totes justified in their ban on unnecessary walking?

    • rhywun

      More people since COVID have taken advantage of less vehicle volume on the roads and are taking more liberties, like speeding, impaired driving and driving unrestrained

      Meh, xe’s not wrong.

      The drag racing around here is through the roof. Bored teenagers with nothing to do come over here from Staten Island and tool around all day with their modified mufflers driving everyone crazy.

      /yells at clouds

      • kbolino

        As far as I can tell, they must have put up a sign on the nearby Interstate saying “drag strip, race at your convenience”. At least the three solid months of nightly fireworks finally stopped in July.

    • Agent Cooper

      29-year-old Littleton woman who was hit by a pickup truck while crossing a street in Tilton last week.

      Those Littleton fucks better learn to steer clear of Tilton. We don’t want any part of your Littleton nonsense. We will run you the fuck over.

  63. The Late P Brooks

    So they issued corp. paper at ever higher yields? Haven’t noticed Vanguard’s Money Market yield going up. Even if the money markets stuck to very conservative paper, investors should see the m.m. yields going up.

    I think the Fed stepped in and propped up the market, specifically to keep rates from rising. Because zero interest rates are the sign of a healthy economy.

  64. Idle Hands

    https://www.jewishpress.com/news/media/former-head-of-israels-space-program-the-aliens-asked-not-to-be-revealed-humanity-not-yet-ready/2020/12/05/

    The UFOs have asked not to publish that they are here, humanity is not ready yet. Trump was on the verge of revealing, but the aliens in the Galactic Federation are saying: Wait, let people calm down first. They don’t want to start mass hysteria. They want to first make us sane and understanding.

    They have been waiting for humanity to evolve and reach a stage where we will generally understand what space and spaceships are. There’s an agreement between the US government and the aliens. They signed a contract with us to do experiments here. They, too, are researching and trying to understand the whole fabric of the universe, and they want us as helpers. There’s an underground base in the depths of Mars, where their representatives are, and also our American astronauts.

    If I had come up with what I’m saying today five years ago, I would have been hospitalized. Wherever I’ve gone with this in academia, they’ve said: the man has lost his mind. Today they’re already talking differently. I have nothing to lose. I’ve received my degrees and awards, I am respected in universities abroad, where the trend is also changing.

    The truth is out there.

    • The Other Kevin

      They saw how well some people handled Trump being president, and decided to try again in 200 years.

      • Tundra

        Exactly. The observatory in PR decided we were too stupid for other worlds and committed suicide

    • Pope Jimbo

      I laughed in 2017 and thought how great it would be if aliens finally visited Earth and Trump was the one they met with. Think how much angst the goodthinkers would have.

      Now I’m laughing harder at the idea of aliens meeting with Biden. “I swear this translator machine is broken. It seems to work on other people, but this guy just keeps saying gibberish trunalimunumaprzure. And why does he keep waving that piece of chain around and calling us Cornpop?”

    • grrizzly

      They don’t want to start mass hysteria.

      We started it ourselves without aliens. Or did we?

    • kinnath

      People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals . . . .

      • KOVIDKristen

        One of my favorite movie lines of all time

      • Idle Hands

        whole movie is so great.

  65. The Late P Brooks

    The number of pedestrians killed by motor vehicles in 2020 to date is nearly double last year’s toll — another apparent side effect of the pandemic, safety experts say.

    So far this year, 15 people have been struck and killed by motor vehicles, including a 29-year-old Littleton woman who was hit by a pickup truck while crossing a street in Tilton last week. In 2019, eight pedestrians were killed by vehicles.

    DOUBLED! from 8 to 15.

    Women hardest hit.

  66. kinnath

    It’s Happening!

    Michigan secretary of state says armed protesters gathered outside her home, claiming voter fraud

    Michigan Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson said dozens of armed protesters gathered outside her Detroit home, chanting and shouting obscenities about overturning the results of the 2020 presidential election.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      All they needed to do make it totes acceptable is shout “Black Lives Matter” every now and again.

    • kbolino

      Obscenities! My God, they shouted obscenities! Harumph!

    • Agent Cooper

      Did they shoot fireworks at the house?

      Pikers.