IFLA: The “I Had Something, I Swear” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of January 17

by | Jan 17, 2021 | Advice, IFLA | 137 comments

Last week when I was casting the horoscope, I saw two other planets linking up in an oppositional pattern to what was going on, and was pretty sure it would occur today.  Now as I re-cast, I don’t see anything near to what I remember.  There are may reason why one can make an error in their casting — bumping the straightedge*, putting the charts down sideways, and excessive sobriety are common causes.

We still have the Mars – Sol -Venus arrangement that will keep people at each other’s throats, so don’t expect a wave of random acts of kindness.  Sorry.  On the plus side, that arrangement with Mars and Saturn has broken up, so there’s much less likelihood of civilization-ending war breaking out**

Looking forward to Inauguration day, we have a very clear symbolic representation of the presidency (Earth – Sun – Jupiter) with an equally clear countermarker of both the moon and Mars in opposition. So Biden’s term is going to be plagued with military and maritime problems.  Or a flood.  Water will definitely be involved.

Maybe EU/UK fishing rights or the South China Sea?   Probably NOT drowning in a bathtub though, that would involve in moon being in Aquarius, but it’s actually in Pisces which is much more representative of a “fishing accident.”

This is a great week to write love poetry oddly enough.  Capricorn in general is going to have a mild, pleasant week.  Finances are going to be in a state of flux, And there are warning about UTI and incontinence issues.  Mars in Taurus will be keeping everybody angry until March 3rd, when we should see a shift away from that and towards backstabbing and betrayal.  Freshwater fishing will be bad, saltwater fishing will be good.

 

Capricorn: 9 of Wands – Strength in defense, delay, suspension, adjournment

Aquarius:  4 of Swords reversed – Wise administration, circumspection, economy, avarice, precaution, testament

Pisces:  2 of Coins reversed –  Enforced gaiety, simulated enjoyment, literal sense, handwriting, composition, letters of exchange

Aries:  The Magician reversed – Physician, Magus, mental disease, disgrace, disquiet.

Taurus:  3 of Swords –  Removal, absence, delay, division, rupture, dispersion, gloom, sorrow, heartbreak

Gemini:  King of Coins reversed – Vice, weakness, ugliness, perversity, corruption, peril.

Cancer:  Knight of Cups – Arrival, approach, advances, proposition, demeanor, invitation, incitement

Leo:  9 of Cups reversed – Truth, loyalty, liberty, mistakes, imperfections

Virgo:  The Moon reversed- Instability, inconstancy, silence, lesser degrees of deception and error.

Libra:  The World – Assured success, recompense, voyage, route, emigration, flight, change of place

Scorpio:  2 of Wands reversed – Surprise, wonder, enchantment, emotion, trouble, fear.

Sagittarius:  4 of Coins – The surety of possessions, cleaving to that which one has, gift, legacy, inheritance

 

*”Bumping the Straightedge” was the sole album released by my popthrash project in the late ’90s.

**If the boog jumps off this week, I will officially resign my post here.

 

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

137 Comments

  1. KromulentKristen

    Aries: The Magician reversed – Physician, Magus, mental disease, disgrace, disquiet.

    Well, at least I got that going for me.

    • juris imprudent

      Sounds like a pretty normal week of work.

    • Tres Cool

      + Gunga Galunga

  2. Don escaped Two Corinthians

    Gemini: King of Coins reversed – Vice, weakness, ugliness, perversity, corruption, peril.

    I swear I’m not paying Not Adahn for these.

    • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

      You’d better not be. Gemini’s castings have had major suckage this past year or so.

  3. Animal

    Libra: The World – Assured success, recompense, voyage, route, emigration, flight, change of place

    So far, so good – guess the only thing I have to do is make sure my humours are in balance.

  4. Gustave Lytton

    Libra: The World – Assured success, recompense, voyage, route, emigration, flight, change of place

    Discussing finishing up bedroom renovation last night and wife mentions putting hardwood flooring in there. We did it in a smaller room and hallway and decided against it for the last bedroom. Good decision for a number of reasons and now we’re back to putting it in the last bedroom. What about it being hard and cold? Oh, we’ll put rugs down. Ok, we’re going to spend 2-3x the cost of carpet and turn around and put rugs on top of it. WTF? ?‍♂️

    • westernsloper

      Heh. I am a fan of vinyl plank.

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        Same here. We had LVP installed on most of the main floor after the flood, and it’s been a revelation. The last major place to put it is in the kitchen — this summer’s reno, hopefully.

      • Nephilium

        I’ve been saving for a home improvement. Right now the discussion is replacing the carpeting in most of the main floor with bamboo/hardwood flooring or remodeling the basement bathroom into something better (such as a door frame that is a standard door size).

      • Ted S.

        Do the main floor, and just leave the toilet out in the open. Or put up a urinal.

      • Timeloose

        One warning about Bamboo. If you have pets like a large dog, they will gouge standard bamboo even if it has a hard coating. The surface will not scratch, but the material under it can be indented by dog claws.

      • Nephilium

        No pets, no children. But appreciate the warning.

      • Ted S.

        When my parents finished paying off the mortgage on the house and started renovating, they put down Pergo in much of the house. 20-plus years on for the first rooms, and it’s still going strong.

        Dad was also surprised at how easy it was to work with metric. One place where I think metric might have an advantage is in measuring areas and volumes where everything is in multiples of 10 rather than fractions of an inch. Since the Pergo planks were 200 x 1200 mm, doing the calculations on how many were needed turned out to be quite easy.

      • Tundra

        I just did the basement. Absolutely impressed with the product and the results.

      • Gustave Lytton

        By hardwood, it’s actually engineered wood not a true single layer solid wood. The house is directly on the slab and has some cracking issues. It was ok with the first small room we did, but the hallway revealed the unevenness over a longer length. Sure, can sand it down but that’s a cosmetic fix won’t necessarily hold.

        The wife wants to put down some sort of hard vinyl/ceramic plank flooring in the bathroom. I’m just biting my tongue. Looks like the fad flooring in every new/renovated hotel I’ve stayed at in the last couple of years and I’m skeptical it will conform/hold up like the current sheet flooring.

    • Drake

      The guy in front of me at airport security.

    • Ted S.

      Hawt.

    • Fourscore

      If he fell off his water skis he’d be eaten by a 1000 northerns

    • commodious spittoon

      X-Files MOTW

      • Raven Nation

        Also an episode of Fringe.

    • Animal

      I’m in favor of this kind of thing. Stupid people should be conspicuous.

    • Rebel Scum

      Sleeping must be uncomfortable.

    • Tres Cool

      “why does HR need to see me ?”

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        “Because you need to be . . . corrected, Mr. Cool.”

  5. Not Adahn

    So, has everyone gotten caught up on The Expanse yet?

    As much as Naomi would be a terrible wife/girlfriend, she is quite the badass. Actually, every character on that show is a badass, save for the two that are nominally in control.

    • Urthona

      I was letting them queue up.

      • Not Adahn

        I find rationing episodes irritating, especially for this show.

        Some shows benefit from having to think about the previous episode for a while before moving on… Orphan Black, Mr. Robot, Twin Peaks, Neon Genesis Evangelion and the like, but not The Expanse.

      • Urthona

        This show I didn’t think it was too bad on because they are a good length and good to digest but I managed to wait a week sinai decided to let some queue up. I was on episode 3.

      • Urthona

        *so i

        Weird auto correct

    • Cy

      I really enjoyed all three seasons so far. I didn’t like the whole ’embedded news caster’ storyline. I think they’ve done a great job of creating semi-realistic poli-scifi. I like that every season is very different and I hope they can keep it going without jumping the shark.

      • Urthona

        One more season to go after this. Fixed end date.

    • Timeloose

      Opinions on Cara Gee. She is a beautiful woman in real life but downright sexy with the belter eye makeup and hair.

      • Urthona

        It’s weird. An ethnicity that doesn’t exist yet somehow it’s hot as hell.

      • Timeloose

        I think she’s Canadian Indian of some sort. She was also on an episode of Letterkenny as a native

      • Urthona

        Yeah but that’s the real world. meh.

      • Not Adahn

        Gigi Edgely is a woman that is only OK looking, but when she was in her Chiana makeup (bound breasts and corpse coloration) she somehow became hot.

        When I as in High School I was working a haunted house and met a girl there that was also better looking in zombieface.

      • Not Adahn

        Contrast Bobbi and Drummer with the “Girl Powah!” character/scenes from Avengers Endgame.

    • Nephilium

      Part way through the third season here. Just finishing up the last couple episodes of Mr. Robot, and watching Doom Patrol with the girlfriend.

      • Timeloose

        I’ve started Mr Robot and I’m really think it is great so far. It’s spooky how close the reaction to the hack has so manny parallels to the COViD.

      • Urthona

        I saw season one but it seemed like one of those shows that wasn’t going to go anywhere.

      • Not Adahn

        The first episodes are the roller coaster cranking up. The episode where he goes and buys some smack is when the ride really begins.

      • Nephilium

        It takes a couple episodes to really get rolling. If you watched all of season one, and didn’t like it, then it’s completely fair to tap out.

      • Not Adahn

        Yeah. Although I couldn’t figure out how they could have a S2, much less a S4. But they did, and did a good job of it too.

    • Drake

      I’ve been watching “Future Man” on Hulu. It’s crude and stupid and funny. What I need right now.

      • Nephilium

        Yep, light fluff. Which can work well as a distraction.

  6. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: 4 of Coins – The surety of possessions, cleaving to that which one has, gift, legacy, inheritance

    This does not strike me as a portent of good news.

  7. The Late P Brooks

    As much as Naomi would be a terrible wife/girlfriend

    I have had my fill of “Naomi: the Soap Opera”.

  8. KromulentKristen

    Stop the presses…I have a winning Powerball ticket in my hands! Advice on where/how to use the $4? 401k? Bitcoin? Gold? Extra large Slurpee?

    • Urthona

      8 “add guacamole” orders at Taco Bell.

    • Timeloose

      Hot dog and a Icee at the convenience store

      • commodious spittoon

        And a whole carton of Marlboro annnnnnnd it’s gone

    • Brochettaward

      Say Kristen, you looking to get married?

      • KromulentKristen

        I’m only looking to marry the person that Firsted on today’s astrology post…

      • Nephilium

        /golf clap

      • Brochettaward

        You will RUE the day you spurned the advances of the First of all Firsters!

  9. Jerms

    Aquarius: 4 of Swords reversed – Wise administration, circumspection, economy, avarice, precaution, testament

    Circumspection? I got that shit done when i was a baby. Like a normal person.

  10. Not Adahn

    I didn’t get a chance to comment on the cocktail posts, but my Old Fashioned variant I’ve been working on is currently:

    1 tsp maple syrup
    1/4c. brandy
    5 dashes orange bitters

    stir to combine, add enough warm water to drop the sweetness level to that you’re currently feeling like.

    It probably already exists, but since it’s a combination of northern border Old Fashioned variants and is simpler with fewer ingredients I’m thinking about naming it the “snowed in.”

    • Shpip

      Try the same with bacon bourbon.

      You won’t be disappointed.

    • Nephilium

      That hits all four ingredients (Sugar – Maple Syrup; Liquor – Brandy; Bitters – yeah; Water – warm water). With the addition of warm water, I’d probably move that into the toddy family instead of the old fashioned family, but I’m open to discussion and debate on that. The cocktail posts will be continuing. I’ve got a draft already set for the next one, and at least the next three percolating in my head. I acquire trivia like politicians acquire scandals. As we were watching brunch today, I introduced the girlfriend to the concept of the Tom and Jerry mixed drink (which dates back to the 1820’s). If the Browns win, I may need to make up a batch of them for her next week.

      As I mentioned in the morning links, I just had a delightful brunch cocktail this morning that used bourbon, sweet vermouth, chocolate bitters, apple brandy (I’d probably cut this ingredient), and cold brew coffee.

      • Not Adahn

        My preferred fancy brunch place in Austin had pitchers of Milk Punch for you to serve yourself from. It was yummy.

      • Nephilium

        We went to Melt today for Brunch. It’s the first time they brought Brunch back in over a decade. They were fairly busy, and had unfortunately run out of biscuits by 11:00, so instead of biscuits and gravy, I had to suffer through a chorizo and egg bowl.

        I do love that they have a pound of bacon as an appetizer (but we went with the breakfast corn dogs).

      • Not Adahn

        After a couple of them, you’d forget to close your tags.

      • Nephilium

        When I stayed at the BrewDog Dog House (east of Columbus), they had beermosas in the morning. Elvis Juice (grapefruit IPA0, mixed with grapefruit juice. Served by the pitcher.

  11. Mojeaux

    Taurus: 3 of Swords – Removal, absence, delay, division, rupture, dispersion, gloom, sorrow, heartbreak

    GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY!!!

    MOAR?!

    • Nephilium

      So… Browns win today? 🙂

      • Mojeaux

        As I said, I am nervous. I see you as a worthy opponent.

      • Nephilium

        I hope we earn your respect on the field today. I’m looking forward to the game, no nerves here, as we weren’t even expecting to make it this far. For once, I’m very interested in what the Browns do in the off-season and the draft (which is taking place in Cleveland this year).

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Biden’s transition team asked if it would be possible to determine which soldiers voted in GOP primaries or who have contributed to GOP candidates so commanders could station them away from the president-elect. The request was refused fueling their fear of attack.

      JFC. They really really really want to drive a wedge down the middle of the nation.

      • db

        Shades of Bill Clinton requiring all rifles/handguns at military reviews he attended to have the bolts and/or firing pins removed and accounted for.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The Army has confirmed they’ve acquiesced to Biden’s demand for security screening for National Guard members who support President Trump.

        Politicizing the military always ends well.

      • Not Adahn

        Why stop there? White supremacist rioters shouldn’t be in the military. And they shouldn’t have pensions or benefits paid for by the taxes of hard working, loyal Biden-voting Americans!

      • Fourscore

        Getting a little nervous now.

        Who? Me? Naw, I’d wouldn’t look good in a uniform.

        /Slinks away-then runs like hell

      • mrfamous

        One of the easiest “tells” out there are people who view various constitutionally recognized rights and such as “things to be circumvented that are in the way.”

        Like it’s an inconvenience or something.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’ve been directly told by a 52 year old man that I went to college with that civil libertarians abetted Trump and as such are wrongthinkers.

        I recall something about cutting down the forest of laws and the Devil.

      • Old Man With Candy

        “Civil liberties are subject to reasonable regulation.” – Hillary Clinton, 2016 debates

      • db

        In the wrong societal conditions, “reason” can look a lot different than in others. It’s a matter of premises.

      • Jerryskids

        No, something stinks here – remember they always telegraph what they’re doing by accusing others of doing it. Nancy Pelosi is planning on having Sleepy Joe executed before he gets to put his hand on the Bible.

    • Sean

      LOL, wut?

    • Brochettaward

      You’d be paranoid, too, if you knew that you stole an election and were trying to pass it off as if you received more votes than anyone in history.

    • EvilSheldon

      That is indeed, pretty paranoid.

      And demoting the entire Secret Service protective detail? That’s a great move right there! I’m sure that your new detail will be all the more eager to throw themselves in the line of fire for you.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I guess my observation would be that nobody is that paranoid without having done something they felt instigated it.

      • rhywun

        I give it even odds that Biden will blurt out the truth within the first six months. Probably to one of the late-night morons.

      • Rebel Scum

        He already said it before the election. But you are probably right.

      • Tres Cool

        How great would it be if he went full-blown dementia and started babbling about how they did it in the middle of some speech. Perhaps a college commencement this spring.

    • Rebel Scum

      So it is going to be a Stalin presidency then. Their guilty conscience is driving them mad.

      Biden’s transition team asked if it would be possible to determine which soldiers voted in GOP primaries or who have contributed to GOP candidates so commanders could station them away from the president-elect. The request was refused fueling their fear of attack.

      I recall Dems freaking out when Trump said something about loyalty of cabinet members. I guess loyalty is only ok for Democrats. And I highly doubt that a service member is going to take a shot at the president, regardless of any political leanings. But purge all the Trumpites from the military for good measure*.

      *but then you might not have a military…

      so they’ve asked commanders to confiscate all ammo and magazines from the soldiers.

      If they are unarmed how are they going to stop the murderous Trump mob I have been assured is going to be there?

    • Shpip

      Worried about getting the Anwar Sadat / Indira Ghandi treatment, eh?

      I think Brochetta nails it as to why.

    • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

      What will they do once they discover that, of the 25,000 service personnel tapped on the shoulder to guard the Inauguration, 24,500 of them voted for the Rs?

      • db

        Likely nothing, as there is no threat. They are making this up to cause fear and confusion.

    • Raven Nation

      Either that, or this is just another play to their base. You know, we have to be on guard all the time because of those crazy Trumpsters out there.

  12. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Spoke to a Protonmail business account sales rep on Friday. They are completely swamped with new business.

    Gee, I wonder why?

    • db

      Go figure.

    • Not Adahn

      The same reason NY’s vaccination program is such a clusterfuck — Trump destroyed “the infrastructure?”

    • Rebel Scum

      Apparently Styx is having trouble with them. Got a paid account that he can’t access and can’t get help from the company.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Well if you lose your password, you’re pretty much fucked. It is a fully encrypted system.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Gah!

      It wants to eat my soul!

  13. EvilSheldon

    **If the boog jumps off this week, I will officially resign my post here.

    *ahem*

    Mine eyes have seen the coming of another Commie troop,
    We have bent up all the hangers and prepared to slot some soup,
    My yard is full of caltrops and I’ve covered them with poop,
    The boog is marching on!

    *chorus*
    Glory, glory Claymore Roomba,
    Glory, glory Claymore Roomba,
    Glory, glory Claymore Roomba,
    The boog is marching on!

    Outside my door are bachelors, they are leading up the stack,
    The married men are there too, but they’re bringing up the back,
    My Tannerite-filled puppers, he both PROTEC and ATTAC,
    The boog is marching on!

    Add your own verses as the spirit moves…

    • Not Adahn

      I can’t imagine that coathanger wire would be all that durable.

      • Plinker762

        They make good autosears, or so I’ve been told.

      • Tres Cool

        I watched a hillbilly cousin use them for jumper cables once

        Its amazing how they glow under load

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I have noticed that the Oathkeepers seem awfully quiet as of late.

      I don’t think that’s necessarily a good sign.

      • Mojeaux

        They don’t want their lives ruined.

      • Gustave Lytton

        There has already been prep to isolate and ostracize them as crazies along with smearing the leadership. I think that’s already taken the wind out of their sails.

        Plus, while the original movement gathered up a bunch of disaffected people who felt their organizations were betraying traditional ideals, it really didn’t offer a path forward. Now what? There wasn’t some giant oath breaking event that could be stood up against, it was a one way ratchet incrementally crushing forwards at a glacial pace. And many of those Oath Keepers are happy to be a part of the bureaucrat state that enables it.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    How paranoid are the Dems? This paranoid.

    Maybe Joe will have an aneurysm when the wind blows a leaf at him.

    • The Other Kevin

      I put this in another thread, but I have been thinking about this lately. Before, when the Dems would win, they tended to overreach because they thought everyone thought the way they did. They assumed they’d have a permanent majority because they would institute all the amazing things a majority of people wanted. Which turned out to not be true, but they never seemed to learn that.

      This time is way different. They aren’t acting like they won. They know they pulled out all the dirty tricks they could muster and still won by the slimmest of margins.

      They also know they screwed over some of their important constituents. The military rank and file will always vote Republican, but the national police union endorsed Trump. There is a serious push to defund the police, and antifa rioting was tolerated and encouraged for 9 months. A lot of blue collar unions guys went for Trump, and now they’re going to get screwed again when Joe cozies back up to China. And all of these people are now called “white supremacists” because of who they voted for.

      They know they don’t have a majority on their side, and a lot of people are seeing through their bullshit. They have every reason to be paranoid.

  15. l0b0t

    Hoo whee! That was a good breakfast. Sausage patties onto small plate, onto which a 2 egg omelet (with Parmesan, cheddar, and bacon) is placed, covered omelet with grilled tomatoes, topped it with a single sunny-side up egg for the yolky goodness, sopped up remnants with rye toast. Huzzah for cookery!

    • Fourscore

      $15@hour. Plus bennies. Or work under the table.

      I’ll need another metal roof next summer, maybe cheaper than the last bunch that were here.

      Last summer I had a group of non-English speaking guys replacing a roof. Anyway, when noon came around I carried up a bunch of fresh tomatoes, cukes, watermelons and jalapenos. I was golden.

      What does “Gracias, senor” mean? I think they wanted to come back the next date.

      • Cy

        Cases of Coors light do wonders with the average laborer.

      • Tres Cool

        And since its a moderately low ABV% and light as water, you can drink it while you work !

      • Cy

        We get it for a buck a pint down her in Tejas!

      • Tres Cool

        When I was stationed there, I remember (barely) drinking lots and lots of “Texas Pride”. Talk about some cheap beer.

      • Fourscore

        Texas Pride and Buckhorn, I did a lot of that by the 6 pack on weekends, inexpensive was the reason. A careful shopper could find that at a buck a 6 pack.

      • Don escaped Two Corinthians

        I’ve escaped Pearl and Lone Star

        but not Shiner . . . that’s my burger beer and I don’t know how to kick it

      • Fourscore

        One of those tasted soapy to me, I’m thinking Pearl

      • Don escaped Two Corinthians

        soapy

        Could be either during their San Antonio years: that’s some chalky water thereabouts

  16. Nephilium

    Alright all. About to walk up to the bar to secure some seats to watch the Browns play the Chiefs. Hold down the fort, and go Browns!

    • Rebel Scum

      How.

  17. Rebel Scum

    Wise administration, circumspection, economy, avarice, precaution, testament

    Gonna be a good work week!

  18. Rebel Scum

    A fine sendoff.

    Refusing to abide by tradition and participate in the ceremonial transfer of power, Trump will instead hold his own departure ceremony at Joint Base Andrews in Maryland before his final flight aboard Air Force One.

    Officials are considering an elaborate send-off event reminiscent of the receptions he’s received during state visits abroad, complete with a red carpet, color guard, military band and even a 21-gun salute, according to a person familiar with the planning who spoke on condition of anonymity ahead of a formal announcement.

    Trump will become only the fourth president in history to boycott his successor’s inauguration. And while he has said he is now committed to a peaceful transition of power — after months of trying to delegitimize Biden’s victory with baseless allegations of mass voter fraud and spurring on his supporters who stormed the Capitol — he has made clear he has no interest in making a show of it.

    Just more destruction of constitutional norms. ///impeach

    That is a stupid tradition anyway, particularly if you were opponents.

    • Tres Cool

      …trying to delegitimize Biden’s victory with BASELESS allegations of mass voter fraud…

      Gotta keep qualifying that statement. Say it enough times and it becomes true.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      They don’t even want him there unless he’s willing to grovel on his rather large belly.

      Fuck off.

      • rhywun

        Right? Imagine the exclamations of horror if he had decided to show up.

      • db

        He’d be totally stalking around on stage behind them, pacing back and forth, being generally menacing. Or that’s how it would be reported anyway. Every facial expression and piece of body language would be scrutinized and interpreted for the viewing audience.

      • db

        And what’s sad about that is that, even in their triumph, they would be making the event all about Trump. They can’t quit him.

  19. Tundra

    Leo: 9 of Cups reversed – Truth, loyalty, liberty, mistakes, imperfections

    Yep, that’s a normal day for me.

  20. Mojeaux

    Bottom line: Half the country’s scared to death for their livelihoods and quality of life. They’ll keep their mouths shut and life under Dem rule will go down the shitter.

    • Rebel Scum

      If you question the leftist agenda you are a white-supremacist, insurrectionist, domestic terrorist.

  21. Jerryskids

    Gemini: King of Coins reversed – Vice, weakness, ugliness, perversity, corruption, peril.

    Hmmm. Trump’s a Gemini, isn’t he?

  22. Don escaped Qanon

    test test sibilance test test