Saturday evening linkaroos!

by | Feb 20, 2021 | Daily Links | 225 comments

You ever have one of those days?

 

I know that this will come as a shock to many of you because I cover it up so well, but I’m actually not that creative. And on a day like today, I’m positively pedestrian.

 

Gee, there’s a whole lineup of pandemics ready for the government to use against us.

 

Now this is what I call common sense auto control.

 

Ummm.

 

Now they won’t even let us sleep in peace.

 

Oakley has always been kind of a rural backwater, 30 minutes east of where I used to live. It’s now just another massive SF suburb.

 

Go ahead, listen to that little voice and have just one more.

 

Here ya go. Inspired by the last Glibs meet up.

 

 

 

About The Author

Spudalicious

Spudalicious

Survey says I’m a Paleolibertarian bitches. That means I eat “L”ibertarians for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Soave tastes a little fruity. Wait a minute, that doesn’t sound quite right…

225 Comments

  1. kinnath

    Snorting heroin. Seems like a great idea.

    • blackjack

      Beats snortin’ whiskey and drinking cocaine.

  2. blackjack

    I actually know a guy ( remotely, now) who went to prison for agreeing (sorta) to perform a genital mutilation on an underaged girl. Details are sparse, but he claims he got set up. He certainly did get set up, but whether or not he actually agreed to do it, I can’t figure out.

    • blackjack

      He also collects old Harleys (lots of them), which is how I knew him. He’s so paranoid now, he won’t even talk to me. He got jacked by a local M/C way back and then the whole prison thing. I guess he don’t wanna have nothing to do with his past. OK by me.

    • Nephilium

      I knew a guy who did genital mutilation on himself… while sober.

      I learned more details then I really wanted to know.

      • Old Man With Candy

        “I knew a guy who…” is a common construction for “I was a guy who…”

      • Nephilium

        Amazingly, it was not me in either case.

        I may have made a lot of bad decisions in my life, but only a few of them involve my genitals.

      • Spudalicious

        “Hey! Watch as I shove this large needle through my dick!”

      • Nephilium

        The 90’s… yeah…

        The (NSFW) 25th Organ Grinder’s Ball (NSFW) is happening this year (after being postponed from last year).

      • Old Man With Candy

        Not safe for tags, either.

      • Nephilium

        That’s what I get for putting up warnings…

        NSFW

      • B.P.

        I was at a bar in Chicago circa 1992 and I saw a guy get a Prince Albert on the…. dance floor I guess it was. (empty space in the middle of a room) They wheeled him in from backstage on a gurney. It made me feel very uncomfortable.

    • creech

      True history: the soldier (Sg.t Boston Corbett) who shot and killed John Wilkes Booth later castrated himself with a pair of scissors.

      • Fourscore

        Wasn’t there a lady practitioner (Mass?) that did something like that to her sleeping husband and threw the extra equipment out of the car window? I can’t seem to recall her name, the big A got me tonight.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Lorena Bobbit. If I recall, he went on to a short-lived (ha!) career in porn.

      • Fourscore

        Thanks, Hobbit, I just couldn’t pull out her name. Not surprised his career was cut short

      • commodious spittoon

        Bobbed, like cut short, like the haircut, or bobcats for their tail. She bobbed it. Talk about nominative determinism.

  3. limey

    Socks on or off?

      • limey

        They are cute. I mean who could be blamed for totally avoiding any discussion of policy to talk instead about those marvelous puppy socks.

      • BakedPenguin

        Surely, there can’t be anything that serious going on in the world.

  4. TARDis

    New legislation would protect drivers who hit protestors criminals.

    Die, road pizza. AKA gene pool cleansing.

  5. Muzzled Woodchipper

    Mark Faulk, a longtime Oklahoma activist who was arrested last year for blocking a roadway, said dramatic tactics are necessary to get people’s attention.

    “The idea of escalating it to the point where you disrupt the convenience of the citizens and of the status quo, you have to do that sometimes to make a point,” Faulk said.

    And sometimes you have to run a motherfucker or 10 over to get across the point that I don’t give a fuck why you’re protesting, and that you ought to get the fuck out of the way.

    • BakedPenguin

      For me, it’d be one thing if they were just protesting. However, they can never seem to stop from bashing the cars that come up against them. If I’m in the driver’s seat of a vehicle that’s blocked and they’re just chanting slogans at me, I’d just do a U-turn and figure a new way to get where I’m going.

      Start bashing my windows, doors, tires or whatever, however… If they want to “make it real”, they can find out that it’s real for everyone.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        This.

        It’s pretty simple. When you’re a 200lb bag of water, don’t threaten a guy who’s inside a 4 ton truck. I don’t care what bullshit math you were taught, I can predict with 100% accuracy who comes out on top of that one.

      • Chafed

        How can I subscribe to your newsletter?

      • EvilSheldon

        Shit, if there’s any way I can get away from a blocked road without running anyone over, I’m doin’ it. Best possible case, hitting someone with your car at speed is going to do a couple thousand dollars in damage to your ride (and good fucking luck getting your insurance to pay out on THAT claim…) There’s also the possibility of disabling your car – people total their cars all the time by hitting deer, and humans are about the same general size. Now that would suck – your car’s out of commission from running down some dude, and his buddies are approaching.

        Still, given the choice between putting the wheels to some idiot and getting dragged out of my truck for a little Reginald Denny action, I know what I’m planning on.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        I’m in full agreement here.

        Just noting that those meetings between protestors and cars often turn very violent, and in that eventuality, the pedal on the right is what’s being pressed.

      • zwak

        I got caught in my car, with a pizza delivery sign on the roof, at ground zero for a riot. I knew things were a little crazy out there, but I wasn’t expecting a pitched battle between 100K drunk college students and a liquor store that has run out of beer. And when they saw that sign they went after my car like nobody business. I put it in first and slowly let out the clutch. I know I hit more than a few people, but I was so freaked out that I was waving a 15-inch crescent wrench out the window and threatening to hit anyone in my path with it.

        It might have been a small riot, but riot don’t give a fuck.

        This, by the way, was the Cal Poly riot of ’91 for any Califonians out there.

    • Fourscore

      A little spray paint on the windshield might up the body count. Be careful out there, protesterds, the life you save…

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      I guess something that happened in 1970 counts as news.

      On a related note, i saw a Rodin exhibit in Vancouver back in 06. It was fantastic.

      • Nephilium

        Hell, I grew up here and never knew there was a Thinker here until I was in my 40’s.

      • Ted S.

        I didn’t think anybody did any thinking in Cleveland.

      • limey

        In Cleveland it’s called a stinker.

      • C. Anacreon

        I’d heard it called a Cleveland Steamer.

      • limey

        No silly, that’s a boat on the Cuyahoga.

      • Mojeaux

        Rodin is da bomb. I have a small The Kiss and a lovely wooden minimalist take on The Thinker.

    • straffinrun

      Fuck him and the horse he…

      • limey

        Michelangelo.

        Oh no, that’s not right…

      • Mojeaux

        Where’s Swissy when you need him?

      • commodious spittoon

        Late. AS USUAL.

    • Flawgic

      I thought Godzilla defeated Rodan back in the 50s.

  6. Muzzled Woodchipper

    Participants in the study were able to correctly respond to questions, such as simple math problems, while they were deep in the throes of rapid-eye movement (REM) sleep. The research reveals a “relatively unexplored communication channel” that could enable “a new strategy for the empirical exploration of dreams,” the study reports.

    What could go wrong?

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Other than letting Freddy Kruger loose?

      • Nephilium

        1…

        2…

        Freddy’s coming for you…

  7. Muzzled Woodchipper

    “The comments made were not in alignment with our vision and are definitely not what any of us stand for as leaders. I know that we lost trust with the community. I will not make excuses for what happened or why it happened,” Hetrick told Fox News in a statement.

    But. Fucking. Shit.

    These comments made in what you thought were private are but a distillation of you stand for. I’m sure the whole matter of it is far more condemning that this.

  8. Ted S.

    Gee, there’s a whole lineup of pandemics ready for the government to use against us.

    I thought the coronavirus killed 100% of people it infected. How could the nipahvirus be 75 times more deadly?

    • BakedPenguin

      It kills you, then looks up your contacts, and kills your friends and family.

      • Chafed

        That is one sneaky virus. I’m deleting all my contacts.

    • limey

      Killed right dead ×1.75

  9. Nephilium

    It’s a Saturday, that means I’ll be kicking off the Zoom/Happy Hour/Cocktail party at 20:00 Eastern.

    I do not promise sobriety tonight.

    /wanders off to make a cocktail

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      Last night was a night filled with drunken debauchery until the wee hours. I got off at 1.15EST, and it was still going strong. We even had a Tejicano sighting.

      • KromulentKristen

        I haven’t been that plastered since my mid 20’s. I may have had a little barfy barf before I finally collapsed in bed. The doge was like “WTF beyotch?”

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        I had the quite rare weed hangover this morning.

        No bueno.

    • KromulentKristen

      I do not promise sobriety tonight.

      I do!

      • Tulip

        Me too!

      • Old Man With Candy

        Shit, this is going to be boring, isn’t it?

      • Nephilium

        So… the girlfriend has asked me to make fancy cocktails.

        You can join us… do you have gin, lemon juice, and raspberry syrup/grenadine?

        It’s saving me from needing to try to deal with kitchen napalm (caramel) after a day of drinking.

      • EvilSheldon

        Yes! I just picked up Grenadine last night, and I think the lemons in the fridge are still okay.

      • Nephilium

        I plan on making at least one Clover Club tonight.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Fucking antisemites won’t let me in.

      • Brochettaward

        I think they’re anti-Firstites. They didn’t let me in, either.

      • straffinrun

        Uh boy. The price we pay for chicken nuggets.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        But they’re so tasty

      • straffinrun

        Because you prefer Mustard over BBQ like a sane person.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        I can be talked into Carolina Gold sauce.

    • EvilSheldon

      Nasty.

      Yeah, everybody is strapped in a gun store, but most of them probably ain’t real handy with the steel. If you’re a hardcore process criminal, the juice might be worth the squeeze…

  10. Aloysious

    Genital mutilation. Does not compute.

    Genital manipulation ( by a pretty wimminz). Computes.

    • Chafed

      What a mess. I can’t imagine what would compel him to commit those crimes.

      • commodious spittoon

        Is it any less fucked up or incomprehensible that Aaron Rodgers murdered those guys?

      • EvilSheldon

        Same reason – they’re criminals. That is their self-image.

      • Ted S.

        I think you mean Aaron Hernandez….

      • commodious spittoon

        Goofy looking dude who plays for the Packers. It’s weird he was never locked up

      • Ted S.

        That was Darren Sharper.

  11. Suthenboy

    Legal to run over protesters in the road? This will become the new mailbox baseball. This will be excellent. It will shut that shit down in a hurry I promise. Louisiana had an increasing number of car jackings back when that got started here in the US so we passed a law: legal to shoot them. Poof, suddenly no more carjackings. It is rare even now and it has been 25 years or more since the law was passed.

  12. Gustave Lytton

    Suthen, saw in the dead thread that you have an 80 gallon hot water heater. You lucky dog. I was looking into upsizing ours for the wife and discovered they’re basically unavailable over 55 gallons now thanks to government mandates that large capacity heaters must be hybrid (heat pump) ones.

    https://www.phcppros.com/articles/5312-water-heater-regulations

    I’m so pissed (again), although the first hour recharge on the larger units is slower than smaller ones but at least it would fill the tub with water to spare.

    • Suthenboy

      Really? This one must have been in the plumber’s warehouse. State or Federal mandates? Maybe Louisiana doesnt have that? I dunno. It has been less than a year since it was installed. I even got the fancy pump that circulates water through the outgoing pipes so you dont have to wait forever for hot water at the far end of the house bathroom.

      Solution: Get two 55 gallon tanks in tandem. Up front cost would be a bit steep but it would not increase your electric bill as the second tank would almost never come on due to it being filled with already heated water.

      • kinnath

        I’ve read about installations where you have a really large, high efficiency (slow recovery) heater feeding into a small, fast recovery (so less efficient) heater. The big heater is kept at a lower temperature, but still quite warm. So you’re feeding warm water into a fast recovery tank. It makes the fast recovery tank much more efficient.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I thought about that but my panel is out of breaker positions as well. Just more things on top of what should be an easy to replace item.

      • Suthenboy

        Your water heater already has a breaker, just replace it with one rated for higher amperage (consult electrician).

      • Gustave Lytton

        Yes, but to feed two would require a new sub panel near the water heaters since each heater needs it’s own separate breaker(s) sized appropriately. You can’t just tap off to feed another one downstream of the last breaker. And the cable between the main panel and the subpanel would need to be reran because the amateur homebuilder who built this shack did not overbuild anything.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Suthen,

        Bad idea. Breakers are sized for the conductors, not the load. You cannot put in a larger breaker without replacing the wiring unless you want to take a chance on burning down your house.

      • Fourscore

        Run another smaller panel from the main one and use that for the water heaters.

    • robodruid

      parallel tanks?

    • C. Anacreon

      Hey Suthen, also from the dead thread, thanks for the kind words and inquiry about my condition. It is now 4 days since the surgery and the pain in my belly from the incision sites and where the chunk of intestine was removed are freaking painful, on top of the already constant chronic pain from my crushed spine and bone marrow cancer. But at least the belly pains are getting a little better each day, so hopefully I will tough it out. I do miss the IV dilaudid from the hospital, that actually did a decent job reducing the worst of the pain, but I have been home for two days from the hospital, so of course no home injectables. Eating full liquids, which is great to get a lot of ice cream, but even that gets tiresome, as does cream soups. Next up, perhaps tomorrow, is a “soft bland” diet, which allows for Wonder bread and cream cheese. Looking forward to hearing about everyone posting about the steaks they’re grilling tonight, a guy can dream, right?

      • Ted S.

        If you didn’t get it over on the mailing list, I’d be curious what you think of this radio documentary:

        Drug-free in Norway?

        Can Norwegians with psychosis benefit from radical, drug-free treatment?
        In a challenge to the foundations of western psychiatry, a handful of
        Norway’s mental health facilities are offering medication-free treatment
        to people with serious psychiatric conditions. But five years after the
        scheme began it is still being questioned by the health establishment.
        For Assignment, Lucy Proctor hears the testimony of Norwegian
        psychiatric patients, and the doctors who have aligned themselves on
        either side of the debate. Why is this happening in Norway? And how much
        power should people with debilitating psychosis have over their own
        lives? Presenter: Lucy Proctor Producer: Linda Pressly (Image: Artwork
        depicting a young woman, with her head in her hands. Credit: Malin Rossi)

        I haven’t heard it yet, since I’ve got a backlog of something like 300 hours of radio programs. 😉

      • Nephilium

        Damn man.

        Thanks for putting my struggles in perspective.

      • KromulentKristen

        Wow. That’s a lot of shit to deal with. Hope you continue to heal all your ailments.

      • Tundra

        Praying for you, Doc. Whether you want it or not.

      • straffinrun

        Best wishes in you in your recovery, C.

      • rhywun

        Yikes, best of recoveries!

        When I had part of my large intestine removed last year, they went through my belly button and a couple tiny incisions on my stomach. Robot arms, they told me.

        I know how wonderful it is going to be to get back to real foods.

        I just ate a really good burger 🙂

      • Fourscore

        You’ll make it now, CA, every day will be a little better and one day you’ll try to remember when it was the pain disappeared. You’re a tough guy, you’ve proved that already.

    • pistoffnick

      She seems nice.

    • EvilSheldon

      Life is hard when you’re an idiot.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      “Posting their Ls”? What mean Ls in this context?

      • straffinrun

        GLOL.

    • B.P.

      Did she shit an entire meatloaf?

      • mexican sharpshooter

        That did seem a bit heavy.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      It occurred to me…if she were in CA she wouldn’t have a grocery bag to shit in.

    • The Last American Hero

      The video below with Biden exhorting the bigotry of low expectations while the dude jumps around his apartment is stellar.

  13. KromulentKristen

    Supposedly a KPI 4 for auroras tonight, but looks cloudy in Churchill and Willow. Not sure about Fairbanks – that webcam doesn’t go live for another couple hours. Europe is also cloudy. Sheeeeeittt.

    • limey

      If Europe is cloudy it is because that is what has been agreed upon democratically by the European Parliament. You have no recourse to petition this, but I can- no wait, sorry.

  14. commodious spittoon

    I need a coder to make me a magical script that turns CAD files into pixie dust that I can sprinkle on my computer to make hours and hours of drudgery go away. That is more or less exactly what I need, and I’m going to ask my boss to pay for it.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Use RPA and ML and so on, then it will sounds like you’re on the bleeding edge. I see rapid promotions in your future!

      • commodious spittoon

        I’m only half joking… and I think I could pull it off in Dynamo, but I’m also thinking it would take me ages to figure it out and we should probably just pay someone who scripts Python to do what we need.

        Essentially, it’s taking linework from structural drawings rendered in Autocad and applying symbols at the ends of beams to denote connections based on tables of load capacities our engineers developed. It’d have to find junctions in the linework representing beam to girder or beam to column conditions and parse the beam tag text to work out beam depth, and separate text tags representing the end reactions, and then assay a connection class based on the reaction cutoffs in the tables and the conditions in the drawings (beam to girder, beam to column flange, beam to column web).

  15. J. Frank Parnell

    An international team of researchers was able to achieve real-time dialogues with people in the midst of lucid dreams, a phenomenon that is called “interactive dreaming,” according to a study published on Thursday in Current Biology.

    Hey, I remember that movie.

  16. straffinrun

    TFW you see a TedS music link.

  17. Chafed

    I did not need to see that article on genital mutilation. So much for a sound sleep tonight.

    • commodious spittoon

      Back in my day cutters were teenage girls with too much mascara and a bunch of superficial razor scars.

  18. Tundra

    Spud!

    Yesterday at my speakeasy gym, we watched this!

    I’m naming my next dog “Cocaine Katie”!

    I hope all you motherfuckers are well.

    • kinnath

      I remember this when it came out. What a classic.

    • Spudalicious

      I’ve played that one before. Freaker’s Ball seemed natural for this group.

  19. trshmnstr the terrible

    Now they won’t even let us sleep in peace.

    Wait I saw this one… Cohnswlor Troi is floating in some weird CGI ether and needs to release some gas.

    • rhywun

      I remember that one from all the lingering on her ass the camera did.

    • juris imprudent

      She swallers WHAT?

  20. Jerms

    Columbia professor says he does heroin regularly for ‘work-life balance’

    I messed with heroin when i was younger. If i was able to do just a little dope at the end of the day to help me unwind—id be all over that.

    • rhywun

      Did it a few times (in powder form). The projectile vomiting it induced every time was a turn-off.

      • Jerms

        That happens when you shoot it too but right after that its a few hours of heaven.

      • rhywun

        I didn’t like any part of it. Maybe I shouldn’t have been mixing it with coke and alcohol.

      • Jerms

        Yeah alcohol doesnt mix too well with it.

      • l0b0t

        The vomiting has always kept me always kept me away from the peyote as well.

      • KSuellington

        Never done peyote, but have done mescaline, mushrooms, San Pedro, and ayahuasca. Buy the ticket, take the ride. The puking is often part of it, but it’s usually pretty quickly after onset and then buckle in for the trip.

      • l0b0t

        On the other hand, I enjoyed opium enough to know to not touch it again.

    • KSuellington

      Closest I got to that was eating a ball of opium in our little hut on the beach in a small island in Thailand. That is one intense drug, I wouldn’t want anything stronger than that. It was fun once, but I have zero desire to ever do it again. MDMA on the other hand is a fantastic drug, especially in its unadulterated, crystallized form. If it was legal and available I’d do it several times a year.

      • commodious spittoon

        Molly sounds fantastic. I base this off Jay Oakerson sounding really hyped about doing molly.

      • Jerms

        Been sober for the most part of the last 18 years and MDMA is one of the things i really miss.

      • KSuellington

        I’m not one to advocate drugs to people, but if you are offered quality MDMA and are interested in it you will likely have a fricking blast of a time.

      • rhywun

        Yeah, I’m done with all that (I think) except alcohol but of the illicits E was probably my favorite.

      • commodious spittoon

        I legit want to try this drug and I have no idea how to go about that.

      • l0b0t

        I abandoned psychedelics in my mid-20s, being of the opinion that at a certain point one carries too much emotional baggage to have any truck with them. On a 2008 trip to visit father in law in Amsterdam, we did some cultivated Mexican strain of mushrooms from the smart shops. It was really, really nice. I tried microdosing; making a couple three caps into tea, last summer and I found it kept me stable through my shitty, shitty year.

    • Tres Cool

      Years ago when I broke my hand, the ER doc gave me IV morphine. Suddenly, I got the allure of heroin.

      For brief time, jazz made sense to me.

  21. hayeksplosives

    Hi, Glibs gang.

    I finally got the stubborn spousal unit to the doctor yesterday. Good thing, too: his doc called today snd told us to check him into the hospital.

    Said his sodium levels were dangerously low. That explains his difficulty getting around, his impaired mental function, and could even lead to heart arrhythmia. I don’t know if low sodium was part of why he’s been so cranky, but I’ll give him a pass on it this time.

    I’m just happy he’s in the hospital getting IV sodium, nutrition, and tests to see what is wrong (white BC count is up to). It was definitely beyond my ability to move him. COVID rules mean I couldn’t go with him past the entry/check-in, but i can use the break myself, so that’s ok.

    Thanks for the support, all.

    • rhywun

      Yikes. Good luck to the mister.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Damn. Glad to hear that was caught and getting the follow up he needs, and you too get a break to recharge.

      Was the low sodium level the cause alone, or is it due electrolyte imbalance? I recall you mentioning he wasn’t eating so continuing to intake water can do it. Had a guy in JRTC collapse because his leaders were forcing water but not making sure people were eating. Initially thought he was an ordinary heat casualty.

    • KromulentKristen

      You must be exhausted…glad he’s mending & &glad you get a break.

    • commodious spittoon

      Treating hospital entry like the security checkpoint in airports… that’s a practice that can fuck right off.

    • Spudalicious

      Good luck, Hayek. Glad to hear you get a little break. Sounds like he needed to go binge at McDonald’s.

    • Jerms

      I hope they get his chemistry back to normal and hes back to normal. Sounds like an easier fix than a bad bout of depression. Good luck.

    • KSuellington

      Good you got him to go. Hope he is back and salty as ever soon.

    • one true athena

      Oh goodness, hope he gets well soon. And that you get a break for awhile to recharge after all the stress of trying to figure out what’s wrong with him.

    • hayeksplosives

      Thank you again, fellow earth-dwellers. I called the hospital a few minutes ago for an update. They were just checking him into a room (he was in a room off the ER for several hours). The doc said the low sodium was from the sweating and diarrhea without adequate replacement. They took née blood tests at the ER confirming the white cell count elevation.

      He’s negative for COVID and for flu. They are keeping him for two reasons: one to restore nutrition, and two to get a diagnosis & plan.

      They said to call again in the morning, so I shall. The doc also said he was a “nice guy” and “in good spirits” so that tells me right there that the sodium and IV “food” are helping immediately.

      Just needed a dose of Crabby-Be-Gone!

      I’ll try to recognize it next time if he’s an unreasonable, ungrateful jerk that he might actually be medically affected in some way.

  22. Gustave Lytton

    Making bread again. This is quite nice and convenient too. Maybe we’ll get a rice cooker next.

    Things I never thought I really needed but sure are nice now

    Breadmaker
    Pressure cooker
    Dishwasher
    Chest freezer
    A/C
    Dehumidifier
    Standby generator
    Washlet

  23. Yusef, Chaser of the Devils Tail

    As they sit in the Bar,
    and put Bread in my jar,
    and say Man, what the fuck are you doing here?
    /Michigan Summer

  24. Yusef, Chaser of the Devils Tail

    Living bends the mind, location warps,
    thing aren’t normal, up is down,
    careful the Bogeyman,
    no par for you,

  25. Yusef, Chaser of the Devils Tail

    A list in the current boat launch,
    Time to acquire,
    lost to time,
    til it’s time,
    are you weak kneed? or Manly,
    who goes first, you?
    are you willing to die?

  26. Yusef, Chaser of the Devils Tail

    Head down and powder dry,
    Boats happen,
    Prep and wait,
    Tin foil hat at the ready

  27. Yusef, Chaser of the Devils Tail

    Good Fortune and
    Tall Cans!

  28. Tres Cool

    Im off to work, kids. No loud parties while Im gone.

    /stands and moons Zoom call

    • rhywun

      Just did some work and now I’m on a sort of call for the rest of the night. *hic*

  29. Yusef, Chaser of the Devils Tail

    I told them I’m not an Electrician, but Nooo, now I’m the Head plant Electrician, i barely know what I’m doing, faking it mostly, but they like my work, nothing has caught on fire yet,

    • Gustave Lytton

      Sounds like you’ve moved beyond faking it, and are now makin’ it.

      Huzzah!

  30. Gustave Lytton

    https://www.oregonlive.com/pacific-northwest-news/2021/02/oregon-releases-first-missing-and-murdered-indigenous-persons-report.html

    Fuck you Barr. Another worth swamp creature.

    Discrepancies between reports from the U.S. Attorney’s Office and other agencies illustrate the lack of comprehensive data on missing and murdered Indigenous people. Some Indigenous people were also previously misidentified as white.

    Oh no! They might have been listed as white! A fate worse than death.

    Gee, how about worrying about all missing and unsolved cold cases? And fuck the reporter for calling Indians “Indigenous” with a capital “I”. No one is truly indigenous, it’s all a matter of degrees. If they were born in the state, they’re indigenous.

    • rhywun

      It’s like we don’t even care about them at all. Like they’re not even human. Do better, America.

      • commodious spittoon

        Bureaucrats? They’re not human. They’re capos. Fuck em.

  31. Brochettaward

    Where the white bitches at?

    • commodious spittoon

      They’ve been looking all around for finalists.

      • Brochettaward

        Why would you even say such a thing? Why are you trying to be hurtful?

      • commodious spittoon

        Finality shouldn’t be intimidating to a firster.

        We all must face finality.

        It reminds me of my dog Cali.

  32. Hank

    “Columbia professor says he does heroin regularly for ‘work-life balance’

    “The married father of three has snorted small amounts of heroin for as many as 10 days in a row”

    It’s not addictive, he should know, he’s been doing it for years.

  33. Hank

    “Entire California school board resigns after [being] caught mocking parents over school reopenings”

    You don’t see that sort of mass accountability that often…is there a catch?

    • Chafed

      Only that they did it to themselves. If this wasn’t a public meeting it’s very unlikely they would have been exposed.

    • Brochettaward

      You can go ahead and sue. Better hope you make enough to be set for life because you aint working in corporate America again.

      • Chafed

        This is egregious enough there could be a large payout.

    • Don escaped Qanon

      try to be more blue

      at least I can’t be accused of cultural appropriation this way

    • rhywun

      I’m watching my company take tentative steps in this direction – new diversity czar, constant exhortations for us to “spin the diversity wheel”, etc. A lot of this crap is hosted on LinkedIn too.

      I have a feeling that most of the norms are just keeping their heads down and not playing along. I don’t get the sense that the execs are terribly interested in pushing this stuff, either. We’re not a gigantic corp that needs to be seen as ultra-woke like Coke. Yet.

      • Chafed

        I can see why working from home is so attractive to you.

    • rhywun

      He is that, but it’s notable that this story began before that cretin entered the picture. The rot has been growing for many years.

      • Chafed

        No doubt that’s true. He seems to be a catalyst greatly ramping up the spread and severity.

    • Brochettaward

      We need to go back to a feudal economy, obviously.

      Getting there means changes by individuals, governments and business, but it doesn’t have to involve sacrifice, said UN Environment Programme Director Inger Andersen.

      “There’s a country that has been on that path for 25 years: Costa Rica,” Andersen said. “Yes, these are difficult times, but more and leaders are stepping in.”

      These people are fucking delusional. Tell them to sacrifice their modern lifestyle first.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Yeah right. Their lifestyle is totally justified in their own eyes. The rest of the world, or what’s left of it, needs to shiver in huts while their betters feast in the manor.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Good for them I’m not Samantha Powers or I’d be justified in preemptively capping their genocidal asses.

    • Trigger Hippie

      “The emergency is in fact more profound than we thought only a few years ago,” said Watson, who has been a top level scientist in the U.S. and British governments.

      This year “is a make-it or break-it year indeed because the risk of things becoming irreversible is gaining ground every year,” Guterres said. “We are close to the point of no return.”

      So said every power-hungry Malthusian cunte for the last fifty years…

      REEEEEEEEE!!!!!

    • limey

      That’s a lot of Top Men.

      ?

      • Trigger Hippie

        Hell, I admire the devotion to their beliefs. Westerners would have just watched, bitched and maybe sent out a Tweet or two about it.

    • limey

      I’m racequeer. I guess I’m feeling a bit Andorian today.

      *Attaches crude, homemade little blue antennae to head*

      • Sean

        Greetings.

      • commodious spittoon

        I thought you said raceketeer.

    • limey

      Mornin’, Sean.

      • Sean

        ☕?

  34. Tres Cool

    sup’ fam

    TALL (breakfast/supper) CANS !

    • Trigger Hippie

      From South America to Hong Kong via…Cincinnati?

      Somebody got high on their own supply before shipping arrangements were completed, I guess.

    • Tres Cool

      “why does my cereal cost $100/gram ?”

    • Tres Cool

      /insert random, tasteless, pussy joke here

      • westernsloper

        *sniffs* That joke stinks.

      • Tres Cool

        Something seem fishy about it ?

    • Tres Cool

      “…Training enriches the cat’s life and prevents behavior problems.”

      You know which other Austrian believed that, too ?

      • Ted S.

        Sigmund Freud?

    • commodious spittoon

      NIEDEROESTERRIECH

    • westernsloper

      …Training enriches the cat’s life and prevents behavior problems.

      Pretty sure that is the Australian national motto now.

      • westernsloper

        Oh fuck, wrong continent. Never mind.

      • Cy Esquire

        Are you still awake or did you get some sleep?

      • commodious spittoon

        Österreich, nicht Australien

    • Sean

      I’d go through steak withdrawal. Not worth it.

  35. Cy Esquire

    Ohayo fellow capitalist dogs!

    • Sean

      Dude!