Wednesday Morning Links

by | Mar 17, 2021 | Daily Links | 465 comments

LOL

Man, the Bears have to be wondering how the fuck they ended up paying $10m to Andy Dalton on a one year deal. And their fans have to be wondering why they should bother with this coming season. Deshaun Watson is being sued for something but nobody is really saying what or by who. Real Madrid and Man City easily moved on in the UCL with a pair of matches today to set the final 8. And that’s sports. Well, unless you want to turn this hilariousness into a sport.

WHHEEEEEEEE!!!

Big birthdays today are mountain man James Bridger, motorcycle pioneer Gottleib Daimler, golfer (one of the three greatest players in history, in no particular order) Bobby Jones, civil rights icon Bayard Rustin, NFL legend Sammy Baugh, musical icon Nat King Cole, baseball player Hank Sauer, serial killer John Wayne Gacy, acting great Kurt Russell, another actor and philanthropist Gary Sinise, actor Rob Lowe, rocker Billy Corgan, businessman Martin Shkreli, and swimmer Katie Ledecky.

That was actually a decent list.  Now on to…the links!

I’m sure it pained them to write this. After all, it goes against the narrative that unless you’re for submission to “experts”, you’re a bad person.

Asshole

Welp, this will only hasten the calls for gun control. Better get out there and find a private seller, friends.  Also, prepare for collectivized guilt, regardless of this asshole’s motivation for being a murderous piece of shit.

Who do these assholes think they are? Only American government gets to do that without consequence. We should send these nations “to the back of the queue”, right?

This judge needs to be removed from the bench. He has no idea what his job is and there’s no way in hell this defendant can get a fair trial.  This is abhorrent behavior and should be condemned by anybody who respects our fundamental right to a fair trial and/or how our legal system is supposed to operate.

Can they put him on the cover of Time now, staring at a little hispanic kid? Because that’s what this deserves if that’s what they did a few years ago.

You mean in the fall they can be just like most universities in Florida and Texas? Cool. It’s good to see them finally listening to science.

Newsom and Tapper prepare for the interview

You know why he’s lying? Because that’s what liars do. Also, why does he hates the established democratic process so much?

This is what happens to hitchhikers. The simple solution is to own your own vehicle. But our government dropped that ball some time ago.

Here’s a great song for you. Enjoy it.

Now get out there and have a great St Paddy’s Day, friends.

About The Author

sloopyinca

sloopyinca

465 Comments

  1. robc

    Baseball birthdays: Charlie Root, Fred Pfeffer, Hank Squer, Pete Reiser, Bill Mueller, Jean Segura*, and John Smiley.

    Segura is still rising up this list. He has a chance to pass everyone but Root.

    Not a HoF candidate on the list, but a pretty good list anyway.

    Second from bottom with -2.0 WAR across 3 seasons is Danny Ainge. But I will let whoever is covering NBA birthdays handle him.

    [posted without even seeing if I overlap with sloopy]

    • robc

      And, of course, I prep in advance and typo. Hank Sauer.

    • Gdragon

      A couple of batting titles on that list (Reiser and Mueller) but one of them ran into a wall ?

    • mrfamous

      Kurt Russell is another baseball birthday

  2. Not Adahn

    regardless of this asshole’s motivation for being a murderous piece of shit.

    The targets were all massage parlors? The motivation couldn’t be clearer.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      To instigate more calls for gun control?

    • Gdragon

      Patriots fan?

      • AlexinCT

        Pissed off unhappy endings…

    • Tonio

      To drive up the price of those services even more by effectively forcing clubs to install metal detectors and screen all customers.

      • Rat on a train

        Strip searches?

    • Plisade

      I was just half-joking with a friend yesterday, saying it’s time for mass shootings to start again so the dems can push gun control.

      And fuck Atlanta.

      • TARDis

        Hey now! To paraphrase Blake Clark (I think), “I just live here, I didn’t start the place!”

      • Plisade

        I took my kids down to Fort Benning to watch a friend’s Airborne graduation. We all stayed in Atlanta the night before his flight home. As we were sitting in an open air mall type area eating ice cream, a POC approached us and warned that we should be careful, that our kind wasn’t welcome there. My friend is quite obviously Hispanic.

        I vowed to never spend a dime in the Atlanta area again.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Isn’t it odd and so unpredictable that when you immunize a community from criticism by virtue of an immutable characteristic, all the worst behaviors start to show up?

      • juris imprudent

        That is no way to talk about cops.

    • Q Continuum

      Sick of toothy blow jobs?

    • bacon-magic

      He did not receive a happy ending.

      • Sean

        In prison, he’ll be giving them.

  3. Trigger Hippie

    ‘actor and philanthropist Gary Sinise,’

    I once knew a girl so dumb that she thought Sinise actually had his legs removed for his role as Lt. Dan.

    • Not Adahn

      One of my proudest accomplishments in high school was convincing her that spam was an animal. I told her my dad had shot one and had it taxidermied, and she should come over to see it. She saw through that last one.

      • Not Adahn

        Her = a hot pom pom girl.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Should have sold her on a trouser snake.

      • Not Adahn

        I’m sure she had been introduced to that already. Like I said, she suddenly noticed when my offer of proof involved bringing her over to my house.

    • sloopyinca

      Lol, that’s priceless.

      Crazier than Ellen Page cutting her tits off for her role of “attention whore with mental illness”.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Well she is an actress. Or is she/he an actor now?

        I can’t keep up with this shit.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        She’s just batshit.

      • sloopyinca

        I think they refer to themselves all as actors now. Why? I couldn’t say. Newspeak is confusing to say the least.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Axtyrs?

      • sloopyinca

        Thexbiens.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Sufferin’ Succotash!

      • Plisade

        Yeah, you’d think they’d push for actors to be called actresses. Must be penis envy.

      • Gdragon

        Herformers

      • Festus

        ^ Best one.

      • Festus

        So that little girl from Trailer Park Boys was a boy all this time? That’s Inception level mind-fuckery…

      • Bobarian LMD

        Who knew that this was the first gay superhero?

      • Suthenboy

        There are superheroes that aren’t gay?

      • Bobarian LMD
    • Pope Jimbo

      My favorite story like that was a conversation between two very good looking high school classmates:

      Liz: I’m going to take a year off and go live in France
      Andrea: That sounds cool, how will you pay for that.
      Liz: I’ll stay in hostels and I’ll make some money doing light house work.

      Andrea: Are there many light houses in France?

      p.s. I always wondered what lucky French bastard hired Liz to clean his house (and probably his pipes). She was extremely sexy and, um, … liberated?

      • AlexinCT

        The world needs more Lizes…. Pipes need cleaning…

      • Festus

        I’m too damned old for this world.

      • bacon-magic

        You don’t have to clean pipes if you don’t want to.

      • Trigger Hippie

        ‘Andrea: Are there many light houses in France?’

        Oh, my. I think I’m in love.

      • The Hyperbole

        The ditziest girl in my high school went on to become a teacher and is now some assistant director of the district.

      • Festus

        See my comment from yesterday. My high school grad class was 63 strong. 12 went on to teaching careers. All of it was a shill for Big Education. * buys twine, push-pins and starts cutting up old yearbooks* In all seriousness, even back then, they pushed the people that remained into the liberal arts and the guys and girls that liked to get their hands dirty were forced out. When you start with 250 kids and wind down to 63, that should have been a flag. This was a very well-off school district.

      • straffinrun

        Nice. I had a girl in high school ask me during a geography test, “Psst, which Dakota is on top, North or South Dakota?”

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Classic!

      • Bobarian LMD

        “depends on how you hold the map.”

      • UnCivilServant

        You’re thinking of Upper and Lower Dakota. This map is from above, you’re only going to see Upper Dakota.

      • AlexinCT

        I had a girl start crying in our geography class while watching a documentary on the stars when they mentioned the sun would likely burn out in 2 to 3 billion years…. She was scared we would all die… Then she got mad when I pointed out the 2 to 3 billion year part and how she planned to be around that long…

      • Tres Cool

        I was waiting for that. If you didnt link it, I would have

    • Rat on a train

      Think of all the stunt men that are shot for the sake of entertainment.

  4. robc

    Order: Jones, Nicklaus, Tiger.

    Only one of the 3 won the grand slam.

    That order also matches up with the quality of their individual tournaments.

    • sloopyinca

      I’d switch the first two. What Jones did was incredible. But a lot of people didn’t make the trip across the Atlantic one way or the other to play the events back in those days. When Jack won his slew of majors, he did it against the best in the world every time.

      • robc

        He won amateurs and opens in the same year. As good as Jack and Tiger were, they couldn’t pull that off. And to be fair, they turned pro young instead of staying an amateur, but that was their decision.

        The real slam is the Two Ams and Two Opens, they forfeited their chance at immortality for money.

        Jones life is like a Rand or Heinlein hero, excelling at everything. He would be criticized as unrealistic if he were in a book instead of real life.

      • Festus

        He was from Georgia. Cancelled now.

      • Pine_Tree

        Festus is getting warm on what robc REALLY wants to say about Jones…

      • robc

        It is also why sloopy wont give in on Nicklaus.

        If Nicklaus had gone to Michigan, I am sure he would agree with me on Jones.

      • Bobarian LMD

        If Nicklaus had gone to Michigan, Nicklaus wouldn’t be on Sloopy’s list.

        Palmer?

      • I'm Here To Help

        Nicklaus will always be my favorite, mainly because of a one-of-a-kind souvenir I have from him. Back when I was a kid, my grandfather ran the 18th scoreboard at Augusta National, and he was given 4 tickets to the Masters every year. Since my father was an only child, those tickets came to us, and thus I got to go to the Masters every year from around 1975 to 1991.

        We were walking out after the second round in 1981 (I was 9 years old at the time), and a man in a green jacket approached us. He was one of the tournament officials, and he asked me if I had gotten any autographs while we were there, and I told him I hadn’t. The official then handed me Jack Nicklaus’ scorecard from that day. It wasn’t the official Augusta National scorecard, just a slip of paper that Nicklaus carried, wrote down his scores for the day, and signed at the end of the round. Have it framed with the badge from that tournament on my office wall.

        Funny, somewhat related story. I went to Ft. Belvoir to play a round on the course there, and was placed with two other singles. After the customary introductions, we began the round. After the first couple of holes, the other two began discussing the tournaments that they had attended, obviously trying to one-up each other. The whole time I remained quiet. Once they were getting down to the lesser known, obscure tournaments trying to get the upper hand, I mentioned that it was getting a bit sunny and I probably should put on my hat. Pull my hat out of my bag that was encircled with badges from the Masters from ’75 to ’86, and plopped it on my head. My two partners looked at it, looked at each other, and quickly changed the subject.

      • Festus

        ^^^ This guy. This guy is here to help to teach you how to shitlord! Nice anecdote!

      • Agent Cooper

        Nicklaus always struck me as a bit of an asshole. Palmer was the populist.

    • Ownbestenemy

      My dad was a fan of Nicklaus, thus I was a fan of Nicklaus. Asshole he always seemed though.

  5. Rebel Scum

    As many parts of the country embark on an uneasy march toward normalcy, Florida is not only back in business — it’s been in business for the better part of the past year. DeSantis’ gamble to take a laissez faire approach appears to be paying off — at least politically, at least for now, as other governors capturing attention in the opening phase of the pandemic now face steeper challenges.

    Especially interesting considering FL is the old country. Curious, that is.

  6. Trigger Hippie

    Throughout the pandemic, it’s that defiant and often combative DeSantis who has increasingly become the darling of Republicans. He declines most interview requests, including from CNN, even as he frequently appears on Fox News and other propaganda platforms.

    propaganda platforms…

    Pot, meet Kettle.

    • Sean

      He declines most interview requests, including from CNN

      Would you willingly go meet someone who was openly hostile to you? I wouldn’t.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It just says to me that he’s not dull.

        CNN does not conduct interviews with Republicans in good faith, ever.

        Fox, while relatively hostile to Dems, doesn’t stack the interview the same way. The notable exception being Hannity, who used to conduct interviews with his “DO YOU LIKE TO KILL BABIES, YES OR NO?” questions. He seems to have drifted away from that over the years though.

      • The Hyperbole

        I don’t even have a TV so I’ve never seen his CNN show but I listen to Michael Smirconish’s Sirius shoe occasionally and he is always fair and allows his guest plenty of time no matter the party or issue. I can’t imagine him being different on TV he comes across as being serious about objectivity when interviewing people.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Is Smerconish on CNN? I didn’t even know.

        He’s reasonable.

      • The Hyperbole

        He talks about his CNN show and often has the same guests on the radio that he had on TV. They will play bits of the TV interview as a teaser.

      • ruodberht

        He hasn’t been reasonable since he sold out to become famous….12 years ago?

      • The Hyperbole

        OFFS, I listen to him and his is definitely reasonable, remember the ‘very fine people’ bit he had on a reporter that debunked that, he listened, he agreed and after he would correct callers that spewed the left wing version, that’s just one example. He has lefties and righties on and he always listens and is courteous.

      • Psycho Effer

        Smerconish is reasonable and even-handed in my estimation. How he stays on CNN I don’t know.

      • Trigger Hippie

        “Governor DeSantis, why are you so evil?”

      • Festus

        “So what you’re saying is…”

  7. Not Adahn

    NPR story on the incel shooting made sure to call the suspect “white” three times in 30 seconds.

    • AlexinCT

      So white on white Asian crime?

      And why can’t white people other than BLM agitators do mostely peaceful?

      • Not Adahn

        “China Virus” is Proudboi code for “massacre all Asians.” That potato-looking guy on CNN said so.

  8. robc

    Our government not building space vehicles is a positive not a negative.

    • sloopyinca

      I agree. But if we’re gonna have a space program, we shouldn’t be hitchhiking rides from a nation our media and government officials constantly disparage, lest we expect something like this to happen.

      • robc

        Pay enough money and Musk will pick them up and bring them back.

      • sloopyinca

        Has SpaceX figured out how to get into that high of an orbit? Do they have docking ability?
        I bet they could develop it faster than NASA could, but I don’t think it’s as easy as hailing a cab or an Uber.

      • robc

        ENOUGH money.

        I am not sure how much that is. Fast, good, cheap, pick two.

      • UnCivilServant

        Two? Like you’re even going to get one.

      • Bobarian LMD

        So, familiar with government contracting?

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s too much of my day job.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Has SpaceX figured out how to get into that high of an orbit? Do they have docking ability?

        Yes. They’ve done it already and have another crew launch to ISS scheduled for pretty soon.

      • Tonio

        ^This. Particularly now that SpaceX has been certified, and demonstrated capability, to carry NASA astronauts to the ISS. This despite the best efforts of Boeing to knacker them.

        And about that… I don’t see any crewed Boeing launches happening anytime soon; what’s up with that, Boeing? You cheat and the new kid eats your lunch. Womp, womp.

      • sloopyinca

        Well that answers my questions about their capabilities. I genuinely didn’t know.

      • Fatty Bolger

        SpaceX has already had two manned missions to the ISS, one with two astronauts, and a second with four (including two from other countries). The first two successfully returned to earth already. The second group is scheduled to return this fall, and there is also a third manned mission scheduled for fall.

      • Fatty Bolger

        ULA’s sole purpose for existing is to be an endless government teat sucker. Actually building a working rocket is a secondary concern at best.

      • AlexinCT

        Commercial spaceflight will be what gives us a chance to compete, cause our government institution seems to be staffed by the most inept possible people at the top.

    • UnCivilServant

      If we’re going to be wasting money on graft and hand-outs, we should at least have something to show for it.

    • TARDis

      He’s entertaining at least.

      My wife runs Graham Norton YT in her home office all day long.

    • Not Adahn

      Crush your algorithms, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their recommendations?

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Heh. ?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Ah, the most brilliant and the most under appreciated late night comedy show host. He was the Norm Macdonald of late night.

      • Bobarian LMD

        This. His interviews are more entertaining than anyone.

  9. Tonio

    The only way to remove that judge is if Congress impeach and remove him. I believe the last person to whom that happened was the notorious Alcee Hastings (Florida, represent!). There is a judicial disciplinary process but it’s complicated. First you have to have the equivalent of standing, ie you have to be one of the parties to the case and in some way affected by the judge’s actions. The complaint is reviewed by a panel of other judges. You never hear the outcome, even though all the judges involved are taxpayer employees, doing the taxpayers’ business, on the taxpayers’ dime. Generally, they get a sternly-worded letter which goes in their permanent record (no shit). In totally egregious cases they might get docked a day’s pay. But don’t expect that to happen here.

    • sloopyinca

      At a minimum, he should be removed from the case due to his obvious and clearly-stated prejudice against the defendant.
      Furthermore, if the refusal to grant bail is shown to be out of malice, I think this defendant has a reasonable double jeopardy claim since he’s already being punished ahead of his trial.

      • Tonio

        The best we can hope for is a new trial and an early retirement.

    • Fatty Bolger

      Ugly as hell, but promising.

  10. Pope Jimbo

    So now that a white guy shot some Korean women, the left will really go after hate crimes against Asian Americans. The only thing really holding them back so far has been the fact that the videos of the previous attacks were problematic due to the race of the attackers.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      This is the shit that makes me think conspiratorially. I’ve been seeing them ramp up the “racist against Asians” thing since January, and now this happens? Perfect fucking timing.

    • The Other Kevin

      Sounds like half the victims were Asian. Which obviously makes racism the motivation. And not that he had something against massage parlors, which tend to employ a lot of Asian women.

  11. Scruffy Nerfherder

    SJWednesday: What Happens When You’re Too Batshit For SJWs

    A few weeks ago, I saw it happen again: A trans woman I know was being publicly called out on the Internet.

    The accusing post stated, without going into details, that she had spoken and acted in oppressive ways that had made other people feel unsafe. The post further demanded that people reblog the post, spread the word, and ban the trans woman in question from community spaces both online and IRL, as well as deny her opportunities for housing and job access within local queer informal networks.

    Like most trans women I know, she was low-income and struggled with mental health, job security, and barriers to housing.

    With a sinking feeling, I watched as the post rippled out through social media: Over the course of the day, it popped up in my online spaces over and over again, without much discussion attached. The woman herself said little in response.

    I wasn’t sure how to feel, or how to react. I tried talking about the situation with some mutual acquaintances in the “social justice” community, but none of them seemed to feel sure about what to do or think either.

    Certainly it didn’t help that this particular trans woman already had a “bad reputation” – for taking up too much space, for holding contentious opinions, and for being emotionally unstable in community spaces.

    And while that painful, uneasy feeling continued to gnaw away at me, on the other hand, I didn’t want to play “devil’s advocate” to try and excuse oppressive behavior, did I? I didn’t want to gaslight the individuals who had felt personally attacked or harmed by this person, right by denying their experiences, right?

    I wanted my community to be as safe and oppression-free as possible, didn’t I?

    And if that meant forcing this “problematic” trans woman out of it, wasn’t that a reasonable price to pay? What other option was there?

    It’s kind of scary to say this, but sometimes it feels like social justice activist culture creates as many problems as it tries to solve. Or maybe it’s just that our solutions, created as they are in reaction to an oppressive society, end up mimicking oppressive systems more often than we’d care to admit.

    But whether we want to admit it or not, it’s time and past to have some difficult conversations about call out culture – the activist practice of publicly and aggressively confronting politically problematic individuals – and its simultaneous exploitation of and failure to protect the most marginalized and vulnerable.

    I’ve watched so many trans women get called out and exiled from community – and I’ve participated in doing it myself, on occasion. Of course, this practice isn’t limited to targeting only trans women, but I’ve noticed it happening most often and fragrantly to my trans sisters (keep reading for more on why this might be the case).

    And you know, sometimes I have nightmares about it happening to me.

    The following are four ways that call-out culture fails trans women – and, by extension, fails us all.

    • Tonio

      “for taking up too much space”

      Is that progspeak for being a fatty?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I think that’s progspeak for being a loudmouth asshole.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It should be noted that I’ve known transsexuals who were quite normal people other than their determination that they were something other than what they born.

      The author’s existential crisis here has to do with the cognitive dissonance of equating victimhood with immunity from criticism and responsibility for personal conduct.

    • sloopyinca

      “Like most trans women I know, she was low-income and struggled with mental health…”

      Yeah, no shit. It’s literally a mental disorder.

      • AlexinCT

        As I tell people: you have a right to be a total nutjob and believe you are anything you want to believe. But you have neither the right to demand I believe your crazy shit or to force government to rob me to pay to accommodate your insane ideas…

        I don’t want to pay for people that want to look like Barbie or Mickey Mouse either, even though in the case of the Barbie lookalike, we could discuss some kind of payment settlement…

      • Festus

        Jessicca Yaniv waves “Hello” from the cheap seats. I’m not a particularly violent man but if I came across that thing in my Granddaughter’s washroom… Let’s just say the results would not be pretty.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      fragrantly? ?

      • Festus

        Flaming.

    • Tonio

      “for taking up too much space, for holding contentious opinions, and for being emotionally unstable in community spaces”

      So, they’re not going after this person because the person is trans, but merely holding a trans person to the same standards expected of every other individual, ie don’t be an annoying nutjob.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        That’s just your mental privilege talking.

    • rhywun

      Step away from the social media, hon. It’s cancer.

    • Not Adahn

      Trans femme video game maker and writer Porpentine Charity Heartscape

      Eh, it’s no “A href =”https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silver_RavenWolf”>Silver Ravenwolf”, but it’ll do.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Pronounced Throat-warbler Mangrove.

      • DEG

        I tapped out at the synopsis.

    • Q Continuum

      “Like most trans women I know she[…]struggled with mental health”

      Coincidence? I think not.

    • Chipwooder

      If “transwomen” are just women, why do they insist on the prefix?

      • Festus

        It’s just so they can keep the luxurious facial hair if they choose.

      • Rat on a train

        rank has its privileges

      • Bobarian LMD

        That’s Rear Admiral Shitlord to you!

  12. Rebel Scum

    Welp, this will only hasten the calls for gun control.

    Dems were going to push something through anyway.

    • Sean

      *sigh*

      You’re not wrong.

      • Festus

        When the filibuster is done, all your Bill Of Rights are belong to us!

      • WTF

        And SCOTUS will refuse to take up any challenges on 2nd amendment grounds.

      • Rebel Scum

        As if you peasants have standing.

  13. DEG

    Now get out there and have a great St Paddy’s Day, friends.

    I just got home from the Irish pub. I left a bit earlier than planned. The buffet was good, the Irish coffee was good. After taking care of some stuff for work I will head out again.

    More than 4,000 migrant children were being held by Border Patrol as of Sunday, with at least 3,000 of them staying in custody longer than the 72-hour limit set by a court order, a US official told The Associated Press.

    Huh. I thought all was well with migrant children at the border once Biden was inaugurated. What else will the media lie to me about?

    Newsom allies both inside and outside California have worked hard to tie the recall to right-wing extremism, but Tapper pushed back by asking Newsom, “Certainly, all 2 million Californians who signed this aren’t all Trumpsters, I mean, we have interviewed people who were supporters of yours who are now supporting the recall effort in large part, at least according to anecdotally the interviews our reporters on the ground are doing, because they think the measures you took were too harsh, too aggressive.”

    Countdown until Tapper is unpersoned…

  14. Rebel Scum

    The report also noted that Iran similarly sought to “undercut” then-President Donald Trump’s reelection bid and that China did not seek to interfere in the vote. The intelligence community said it made these assessments with high confidence and insisted that no foreign actors “attempted to alter any technical aspect of the voting process.”

    So Iranian collusion then?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The “intelligenve” community is just keeping the “reasons for war with Iran” list warm.

    • sloopyinca

      The intelligence community said it made these assessments with high confidence and insisted that no foreign actors “attempted to alter any technical aspect of the voting process.”

      My takeaway is this: this is the same shit we pull all the time in other countries. Turnabout is fair play.
      And furthermore, do we not consider the First Amendment a fundamental human right? If so, then what some people call “election interference” is little more than speech and should be protected.

      • Not Adahn

        Voice of America? Never heard of it.

  15. Rebel Scum

    ‘Not only is defendant unable to offer evidence substantiating his claim that he was waved into the Capitol, but evidence submitted by the government proves this claim false,’ Lamberth stated.

    Isn’t that for the jury to decide? (never mind several videos showing cops waiving people in…)

    • WTF

      Isn’t that for the jury to decide?

      Only during the existence of the Republic. But that rule of law shit is long gone.

  16. Festus

    The Hitchhiker’s Guide To Low Earth Orbit. That is a great tune, Sloop! Thanks for all the links!

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Hey F, glad you and truckasaurus are OK. Tacoma: I knew I liked you.

      • Festus

        My Tacoma! (sung to the obvious.) No dents, no rust and only 110,000 miles on it. Thanks, TOG! I really dig my old truck! I’ve no idea what to do when it inevitably calves down the road.

      • sloopyinca

        Is calving a Tacoma how Yaris’s are born?

      • Festus

        Hard to say, never got mounted yet.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        I don’t know why I miss my ex’s T100 so much (not great as a daily driver) but I do.

  17. Rebel Scum

    “Yes, I can say quite clearly: Don’t come over,” Biden replied. “Don’t leave your town or city or community.”

    What a monster.

    • DEG

      Congrats on making it to Hump Day! Have yourself a reward

      Is this This Chive’s version of a participation trophy?

      /scrolls through gallery

      I’ll take it.

    • Rat on a train

      +2 ass dimples

  18. Rebel Scum

    You know why he’s lying? Because that’s what liars do.

    He is the quintessential caricature of a used car salesman.

  19. Pope Jimbo

    I’m excited to see all the wrong lessons that will be learned from this story about Minnesoda utilities getting fucked over on natural gas prices.

    For some reason, Minnesoda utilities didn’t have long term contracts for enough natural gas to cover the last big cold snap. That cold snap also happened when Texas was having its own problems so the price on the spot market went from $3 a dekatherm to $188 a dekatherm. The result is that customers will owe an average of an extra $374.

    Since CenterPoint must pay its gas suppliers now — and ratepayers won’t pay until later — the company must borrow money, the filing said. CenterPoint’s own financing costs would then be partly passed down to consumers.

    So, the average CenterPoint household would pay an extra $394 including $40 in financing charges. To put that in perspective, CenterPoint said its average customer pays about $672 per year.

    About half of that comes from the wholesale cost of gas. CenterPoint and other utilities pass that commodity cost directly to consumers without any markup.

    • Homple

      Since the commodity price is passed straight through to the customer, the utility has no incentive to spend resources negotiating long term, cost limiting contracts.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Iron law about foreseeable consequences.

  20. Suthenboy

    I thought everyone in Florida was dead.

    How many of these type shootings (not gang related) did we have in the Trump years? I am sure it is just a coincidence.

    China Joe did not need the Ruskies help

    There is no such thing as Qanon. Shit, it is right there in the name. Yes, that Judge needs to be in a different line of work.

    “Dont come”. Looks like the crush of illegals China Joe encouraged are starting to generate some bad optics.

    Looks to me that Newsome and Cuomo are toast. Couldn’t happen to nicer guys.

    I am too lazy to whip up biscuits this morning so I am just going to buy some. Back later y’all.

    • Not Adahn

      Bought biscuits? That are worth eating?

      • Suthenboy

        The girl in front of me was chatting up the cashier. She is from California visiting. She had never been to Louisiana before. She was going on and on about how good the food was here. Yesterday she had bought one biscuit there and could not believe how good it was. She was buying ten more today with gravy for everyone in her family. She was also marveling at how every other convenience store here has a kitchen and the best fried chicken she has ever had.

        Does that answer your question?

      • UnCivilServant

        All that tells me is that commiefornia has a shortage of biscuits. Unsurprising.

      • Not Adahn

        I’ve only found one place in NY that makes biscuits worth eating, and it’s not my diner. Aaaand they charge $4 a piece for them. I still get one occasionally.

      • Ownbestenemy

        We feed radar data to Nellis AFB and they barely have any competent technicians to troubleshoot when we have issues. We verify that once it hits our fiber, its all good so the issue is either telco or on their end. For two weeks they kept trying to throw it back at me that the issue was on my side.

        Checked in to this morning to patch some modems to known good lines and I get “well our night crew did some work last night and everything is working now”….fuckers. Just flat out lazy or have no idea what the hell they are doing.

      • Ownbestenemy

        ugh..I give up. Not sure why this posted here.

      • Bobarian LMD

        You wanted to put gravy on it?

      • l0b0t

        Suthen is right as rain. I never liked boudin until I had fresh boudin balls at a wee, ramshackle filling station just South of Krotz Springs. Just a teen girl working the counter/pump controls and an elderly man running a tiny kitchen. It was so good, we turned the car around and went back for more.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        We used to have The Y. It was a convenience store at a Y in the road, and was a cultural institution here (not to mention the only place to get gas on this stretch for 10 miles in 1 direction, and 20 in the other). It had the best food in the county. Their country fried steak and biscuits and gravy were legendary.

        Until it was eminent domained 2 years in order to put in some fancy interchange to make the intersection safer (that hasn’t even been started yet). And although that intersection was pretty dangerous, with at least 1 horrific accident every couple of years, there were at least 3 other ways they could have addressed the problem without tearing down the Y, but chose the most complicated, expensive, and destructive way to do it, against the wishes of virtually everyone in the community outside of those who run the city and county.

        https://m.jessaminejournal.com/2020/09/09/wilmore-y-design-concerns-residents/

      • R C Dean

        The best breakfast burritos I’ve ever had are from a convenience store in nowhere, TX. Little kitchen, with a couple of Mexican ladies making tortillas by hand, cooking the bacon and eggs, etc. I’d ordinarily eat one, but would wolf down two every time we stopped.

  21. Rebel Scum

    Perhaps because the US is not a democracy.

    Stephanopoulos asked, “Aren’t you going to have to choose between preserving the filibuster and advancing your agenda?”

    Biden said, “Yes, but here’s the choice. I don’t think that you have to eliminate the filibuster. You have to do it what it used to be when I first got to the Senate back in the old days,” Biden explained. “You had to stand up and command the floor. You had to keep talking.”

    Stephanopoulos asked. “So you’re for that reform? You’re for bringing back the talking filibuster?”

    Biden confirmed, “I am. That’s what it was supposed to be. It’s getting to the point where, you know, democracy is having a hard time functioning.”

    Oh, you meant Democracy. Nothing like holding the White House, a slim majority and a VP tie-breaker in the Senate. ///mandate

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Bringing back the talking filibuster isn’t the end of the world. Just smoke some meth, grab War and Peace, and get your ass out there Senator.

  22. Scruffy Nerfherder

    SJWednesday – Decolonize Your Vocabulary Edition: Necropolitics

    Imagine this: You’re stranded on a raft in the middle of the ocean, along with a CEO, a doctor, a musician, a student, and an unemployed person. There’s a hole in the floor and the raft is slowly filling with water. It can hold the weight of only five people. One of you has to go. Who do you throw overboard?

    The decision we make in this scenario tells us a lot about whose lives we value and why. Take that logic and expand it to a global stage and that, to me, is necropolitics: the calculus behind who gets to live and who must die.

    At its core, I see necropolitics as a manifestation of capitalism and its related institutions of violence: white supremacy, the prison-industrial complex, cisheteropatriarchy, and colonialism. Capitalism bleeds us all. It quantifies our lives. It predestines our deaths. In the sinking-raft scenario that opened this article, I would argue that a capitalist will choose the CEOs life over yours or mine in every instance. Capitalism drives necropolitics through the scarcity myth — that, during a global pandemic, for example, there are simply insufficient resources for us all, so some of us have to die. But that doesn’t have to be true. If we prioritize redistributing wealth and taking care of each other, there might be enough for everyone. The creator of the polio vaccine, Jonas Salk, refused to patent his invention to ensure that the life-saving vaccine remained cheap and accessible. Instead of companies patenting their COVID-19 vaccines, what if we, like Salk, thought of the vaccine not as a proprietary product, but as a “common good”? But, of course, this vein of thinking does not align with the individualistic logic of capitalism.

    • Not Adahn

      I would argue that a capitalist will choose the CEOs life over yours or mine in every instance.

      Why? Are they hot? Honestly, the CEO is probably pretty good at schmoozing people, so they’d be the most likely person to turn the others against me. So they’re the first to go. Unless one of the others smells really bad or something.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        A capitalist would choose to preserve the life of the person who was most likely to help keep themselves alive. In almost every imaginable case, that’s not the CEO

      • Not Adahn

        That was a game we used to play in the fraternity house — once we took over the world, which of the other brothers would we kill first in order to maintain our dictatorship.

    • Chipwooder

      word salad; didn’t read

    • sloopyinca

      That’s a lot of words to say “I want the government to steal money from other people and give it to me”.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        This person is studying for a JD and PhD from Stanford. This is the future.

        Namrata Verghese is a writer and academic. Currently, she’s a graduate student at Stanford, working on a JD and PhD in Modern Thought and Literature. In 2019, she graduated from Emory University summa cum laude as a Robert W. Woodruff Scholar. She recently earned an MA with Distinction in Postcolonial Studies at SOAS University of London, which she used as an excuse to watch Bollywood movies for “research.”

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        “Postcolonial Studies”
        And that’s all I need to know…

      • Chipwooder

        Any degree ending in “studies” is horseshit

      • Spartacus

        Shorter version: “I am going to remain a student forever as long as someone else will pay for it.”

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        “What are you majoring in?”

        “Primitive Cultures.”

      • Festus

        “Can I dance wif yo date?”

      • Tres Cool

        + OTIS !

    • PieInTheSky

      I mean in my experience, scarcity is more of a myth under capitalism than it was under socialism. Romania in the 80s did not have much going for it, but it did have scarcity aplenty. Food, heat for homes in winter, gas, electricity, cars, clothes, electronics… all were fully scarce.

      • PieInTheSky

        Point is it is easy to believe scarcity is a myth when you don’t see all around you every moment.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Excellent point. Kind of like fish saying water is a myth, because they can’t see it. But empty the tank and see what happens.

    • Q Continuum

      “the calculus behind who gets to live and who must die”

      Translation: I’m ever so eager for the subhumans that disagree with me to be lined up against the wall!

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        What are the odds this person took Calculus?

      • PieInTheSky

        between the chick with small tits and the one with huge tits throw the latter overboard maybe she floats better. Also the small tits chick probably needs fewer resources and thus has a higher survival rate.

    • Spartacus

      “…necropolitics as a manifestation of capitalism and its related institutions of violence: white supremacy, the prison-industrial complex, cisheteropatriarchy, and colonialism.”

      That right there is my cue to stop reading.

      Today is Mrs. Spartacus’s birthday, so I’m going to swear off reading bullshit for the day. Except for what I have to read for work.

      In other news, I got an email from a listserv yesterday with a signature block that has to be the best title ever:

      Dean of the College of Ethnic Studies
      Professor of Race and Resistance Studies
      Professor of Sexuality Studies

    • l0b0t

      “There’s a hole in the floor and the raft is slowly filling with water. It can hold the weight of only five people.”

      Bless her heart. That’s not how rafts or boats or buoyancy works.

      • juris imprudent

        Really it is a perfect metaphor for socialism – this system is doomed and we’re all going to die, but we’re going to argue over who should die first.

      • Pine_Tree

        And it’s utterly beyond them to think of something besides murdering the person of their choice. Even ignoring the technical stupidity of this particular analogy, maybe:
        – Fix the raft
        – Paddle around and look for other flotsam and jetsam that might be floaty
        – Take turns hanging onto the side
        – Or maybe somebody volunteers to die

        But no, displays of adaptability or spontaneous order can’t even be considered. Just pick somebody to kill.

      • UnCivilServant

        They people asking the question are like the aliens from signs, they dissolve on contact with water.

        Besides, depending on the design of the raft, it can’t hold water anyway.

    • pistoffnick

      YOU DON”T THROW PERFECTLY GOOD MEAT OUT OF THE ROWBOAT! YOU EAT IT!

      Listen… chaps… there’s still a chance. I’m… done for, I’ve got a gammy leg and I’m going fast; I’ll never get through. But some of you might. So… you’d better eat me.

      ?: Eat you, sir?

      C: Yes. Eat me.

      ?: Iiuuhh! With a gammy leg?

      C: You needn’t eat the leg, Thompson. There’s still plenty of good meat. Look at that arm.

      5: It’s not just the leg, sir.

      C: What do you mean?

      5: Well, sir… it’s just that…

      C: Why don’t you want to eat me?

      5: I’d rather eat Johnson, sir!

    • Agent Cooper

      Which one will I be forced to eat is the more pertinent question? The CEO probably has the most fat on his bones, followed by the unemployed person.

    • EvilSheldon

      She doesn’t even get a single paragraph in between setting up a resource management scenario, and, ‘ScARcItY iZ a MYth!!1!’

      • juris imprudent

        “Imagine there is no hole in the floor of the lifeboat”.

    • Psycho Effer

      I stopped at “Decolonize”.

      Not really. It is important to attempt to understand your enemy. If you don’t understand your enemy, how are you ever going to drive him before you and and hear the lamentation of his womxyn?

    • Ted S.

      I throw the ethicist overboard.

      • db

        If you have enough time to worry about lifeboat ethics, you have enough time to bail, Young Man!

  23. Rebel Scum

    Do you what is great for an economy, especially in hard times? Raising taxes.

    NEW: In meeting tonight, Pelosi floated some potential payfors for infrastructure package, specifically hike in corporate tax rate or cap gains tax, per multiple sources.

    Still says she wants bill to be bipartisan but reconciliation also an option.

    Some progressives, including Warren, are pushing for a wealth tax. But it’s enormously complicated to implement.

    Unity, healing, etc.

    • Chipwooder

      Higher corporate taxes totally won’t be passed on to the consumer.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Yep, it’s all baked into the pie for the end consumer but they’re well aware, they just don’t give a shit.

      • Sean

        Cuz they all get that sweet CCP cash.

    • Q Continuum

      “it’s enormously complicated to implement”

      Which is why most of even the tax-happiest Euro countries have abandoned it.

    • PieInTheSky

      TAX IT ALL ! TAX IT ALL!

    • sloopyinca

      By “enormously complicated”, I assume they mean “unconstitutional”.
      The income tax is permitted under the 16th Amendment. Government has never been granted the ability to tax wealth.

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s a penalty.

        And by your rationale, localities’ property taxes must also be stricken as unconstitutional. (Not that I disagree, but it does feed into the calculation as to whether the courts will ever say ‘no’ to another such infringement)

      • Animal

        Property taxes aren’t Federal. The Constitution states in part:

        Article I, Section 9, Clause 4:

        No Capitation, or other direct, Tax shall be laid, unless in proportion to the Census or Enumeration herein before directed to be taken.

        The 16th Amendment was ratified to allow a tax on income without this “in proportion” clause, but it only applied to income, not wealth. As proposed, by Liawatha Warren and others, a wealth tax is unconstitutional; not that they give a shit.

      • UnCivilServant

        Sloopy said ‘government’ and didn’t mention apportionment of taxes.

        And the localities shouldn’t have tax powers anyway.

      • sloopyinca

        Property taxes aren’t direct taxes on people. The tax is on the land itself regardless of owner.
        The only constitutional challenge against property taxes I could see would be on the application of a homestead exemption and whether it’s indirectly a tax on individuals who don’t reside in a property they own.

      • Rat on a train

        Property taxes are a direct tax on the property. Indirect taxes are those on transactions.

      • PieInTheSky

        Government has never been granted the ability to tax wealth. – bad has it been explicitly forbidden?

      • sloopyinca

        Article 1 Sec 9 Clause 4 of the Constitution is pretty clear.

      • PieInTheSky

        the Constitution – that dusty old thing?

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Would 1900 Sloopy say the same thing about an estate tax?

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      They do know that most of this wealth that they speak of is based on securities that have a value based on speculation right? And that this will create unimaginable chaos in the market for said securities?

      Of course, they do. They just don’t care.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    Republicans For Are Dummies, ch 631

    “The lack of response to this bill in an organized messaging and aggressive media push back is shown by the fact that Democrats have now gone from $2 trillion to a $4 trillion infrastructure package. If Covid relief was that easy, why not just run the table?” said former Trump White House chief strategist Steve Bannon.

    “It’s a fairly popular bill that polled well because it’s been sold as a Covid relief bill with direct cash payments to Americans — what’s not to like?” he added. “However, that’s not what the bill is. That’s a huge problem because 2022 has already started and you don’t see the fight here.”

    Bannon isn’t alone in his lament. Elsewhere in conservative circles, a feeling of missed opportunity has taken root in the wake of the passage of the Covid-relief bill last week. Republicans were never expected to support the measure and unanimously opposed it when the time came for a vote. But in interviews with top GOP operatives, Trump confidantes, and congressional aides, there was a common refrain that the party could have done more to frame it for the public. Instead, periodic claims that the bill was bloated with progressive add-ons and bailout money for blue states were overshadowed by a more relentless focus on the culture wars du jour.

    “Whenever there is something that goes into pop culture and now all this cancel culture stuff, it is catnip for the base and the media and Republicans are going to talk about that,” said GOP strategist Doug Heye.

    No coherent response, you say?

    Next, you’ll tell me they not-so-secretly benefit from that giant free lunch giveaway.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The Reps wouldn’t know effective messaging if it kicked them in the junk. Exhibit A: Mitch McConnell, one of the most unappealing human beings on the planet.

      • juris imprudent

        Do you ever contemplate that a really great message in our general opinion is probably not one that would generate a lot of enthusiasm amongst the electorate? The Dems make their pitch because people are fools for that; the same for Repubs. There are very few fools for anything else.

      • Agent Cooper

        If the Republicans were cromulent with their base, they would still have the Senate in 202, Jeb Bush could’ve been elected in 2016, and Paul Ryan would be running in 2024.

      • juris imprudent

        The Repubs are very likely to retake House and Senate in ’22, not because of their inherent messaging but because the electorate is fickle and will express it’s unhappiness with the President’s party thus.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    Higher corporate taxes totally won’t be passed on to the consumer.

    Only those who make more than $400k/year. Comrade Just-Plain-Folks promised.

  26. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Who needs an Enve carbon road fork? I bought the wrong one off of Ebay and am resigned to losing money on the resale.

    43mm rake. 1-1/8 to 1-1/4 taper.

  27. I'm Here To Help

    Government efficiency at its best:

    Yesterday I got an email from the agency that handles our pay, informing me that due to language in the NDAA for this year, leave that would have been lost at the end of last year (we can carry over 240 hours of annual leave, anything over that amount is lost – “use or lose”) was carried over to this year due to the COVID shutdowns and people not using nearly as much leave. The email also informed me that this restored leave had to be taken before any regular annual leave for the year, and that if leave had already been taken, I had to go back and do a retroactive leave request and update the timesheet to use the restored leave first.

    So, I (a GS-14) had to go back to a leave request in January, update it to remove the restored leave, submit a new leave request for the restored leave, and update my timesheet for that pay period. My supervisor (a GS-15) now has to go in and review each of those documents.

    All for 0.25 hour of leave – 15 freaking minutes. Seriously, between the two of us, we spent way more than the 15 minutes of leave that was restored to do the updates (our time recording systems suck, and often take multiple attempts before things will actually take).

    • juris imprudent

      That almost sounds the time spent doing that may have cut into your time spent on annual mandatory training.

  28. Pope Jimbo

    This story summarizing current Minnesoda Rona stuff is a good reason why we are fucked.

    1) Claims that we need to care about infected teens because of asymptomatic spread – despite lack of evidence
    2) Uses charts based on “report date” not actual date. If you believe their charts, Mondays are the safest day to be alive here because no one dies on a Monday.
    3) Politics:

    The Health Department on Tuesday reported about 7,500 new vaccinations, down from more than 20,000 the prior Tuesday and one of the lowest counts over the past month. The seven-day trend is now running just below 40,000 shots daily.

    It’s not necessarily a problem as the state expects to see federal vaccine shipments jump in coming weeks. Right now, though, the overall trend is flat to declining following an early March jump.

    Maybe I’m misreading that, but to me that statement says we are only doing 1/3 of our target vaccination rate because the Feds aren’t shipping enough vaccines. Biden has been crowing lately about how his administration had to completely figure out how to distribute vaccines. This would seem to indicate that he may have been fibbing about that success? We all know what the response would be if Trump was president.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Why is there no one who can effectively get the message out that our goal shouldn’t be to have every single person vaccinated? Instead our goal should be to have every person over 50(?) vaccinated as well as younger people who are in the high risk group. (Not sure what the best age is for a vaccination goal).

      Once those people have been vaccinated, we shouldn’t give a shit about cases. Oh no! Young kids who have 0% chance of dying have a surging case rate!!!!!

      A public health department that actually gave a shit about public health would be blaring that message out to everyone.

    • PieInTheSky

      1) Claims that we need to care about infected teens because of asymptomatic spread – despite lack of evidence

      ABSENCE OF EVIDENCE IS NOT EVIDENCE OF ABSENCE!!!!!!! PRECAUTIONARY PRINCIPLE !!!!!!! / Nassim Taleb

      • EvilSheldon

        Absence of evidence, *IS* evidence of absense. It is not *PROOF* of absence.

        Also, the word you were looking for is ‘Resilience.’ It’s been in the English language for a while now.

      • EvilSheldon

        That remark was aimed at Taleb, not Pie. I know that Pie knows what resilience is.

      • PieInTheSky

        resilience schmesilience, antifragile is where it’s at

  29. db

    For those of you into fine cookware, All-Clad is having their periodic factory seconds sale.

    Most of the cookware is made in the US just south of Pittsburgh.

    • Chipwooder

      Dammit…..I literally just bought a new pan last night.

    • UnCivilServant

      With scripts off, I can see the merch. If I turn scripts on, I get blocked by an email harvesting page that wants to spam me.

      In order to participate in the event you must accept the Terms and Conditions. If you do not accept the Terms and Conditions you will not be granted access to the site. If you encounter any issues logging into this Sale please contact us at allcladviphelp@groupeseb.com for assistance.

      By providing your email address to participate in this event you are opting in to receive future event communications. If you would like to opt-out please send an email to allcladviphelp@groupeseb.com.

      • db

        I have a catch-all address I use for things like that. I can change the regex in my e-mail server to reject specific incoming addresses if needed.

      • Pope Jimbo

        There isn’t any confirmation needed so you can use any email address.

        That is why I used UC’s email address.

  30. Rebel Scum

    Republicans pounce.

    The situation at the border has become a lightning rod for criticism from Republicans. They’re seizing on the issue politically at a moment when the White House is trying to keep the focus on the COVID relief law. Later this hour, President Biden will be departing the White House for Pennsylvania, as he and the Vice President continue to hold events all across the country this week, touting their response to the COVID crisis. Meanwhile, Republicans are planning more visits to the border.

    Wanting to “dive into politics of this current moment,” Todd wailed: “…Republicans try to keep focus on a border emergency. In some ways they’ve sabotaged our immigration policy and this is why we’re here…” Despite Biden actually being in the White House, Todd singled out a top Trump aide for blame instead: “…look, this is an impossible situation in some ways, because in many ways, the asylum process was essentially destroyed by Stephen Miller, they sort of blew it up, and so it is an extra mess.”

    Chucky is a particularly vile hack.

    • Ownbestenemy

      And by sabotage he means they didn’t give the Democrats all they wanted. I won’t absolve either party of this mess. Congress has fucked up immigration for decades.

    • Agent Cooper

      Where I come from, people don’t eat songbirds.

      • Animal

        Starlings aren’t songbirds, except, perhaps, in the sense that they are passerines. But there is nothing appealing about them; they are ugly, noisy, dirty scavengers, prolific to a fault. They have literally no redeeming qualities, and the people that imported them to the New World should be roundly damned for their stupidity.

      • Agent Cooper

        I was looking for a shorthand word to say small bony-ass birds in your yard.

      • Not Adahn

        With a side of lark’s tongues?

    • Pope Jimbo

      Didn’t Hannibal Lecter eat a Starling?

    • Suthenboy

      You would expend more energy plucking them than you would get from eating them.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Plucking game birds is a waste of effort. Just skin them and be done with it.

        The only reason you’d want to keep the skin was if you wanted to roast them whole. And most game birds are so lean that roasting is a wasted effort because they will dry out badly.

      • Animal

        Our usual way of cooking grouse is to just lift the breasts, stick them in a crock pot, cover them with cream of onion soup, let them cook all day. Delicious.

      • Pope Jimbo

        We pretty much pull the breasts out of grouse, cut them into strips, then wrap the strips with jalapenos and bacon. Broil them for a bit and eat them as appetizers.

      • Pope Jimbo

        You can also give them to Fourscore. He likes them and will give you delicious honey back in return.

  31. The Other Kevin

    Trump: “Don’t come!”
    Press: “RACIST!”

    Biden: “Don’t come!”
    Press: (swoons)

    I know I’m crazy for saying this, but I still have such a hard time believing that anyone in this country is not seeing through this completely transparent bullshit.

    Great song choice, I have some PIL on my Pandora playlist. Further confirmation that we are all Tulpa.

    • I'm Here To Help

      Another Tulpa chiming in – that PIL song is my favorite. Video is still a bit disconcerting though, and I never knew why until I read the comments – Lydon doesn’t blink through most of the video. Not something that I will immediately recognize while it’s happening, but always puts me on edge subconsciously.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        I nearly posted that the other day, but I forgot (and still forget) why “anger is an energy” came to mind.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    We all know what the response would be if Trump was president.

    Don’t worry. They’ll find a way to pin it on Trump.

  33. Rebel Scum

    Oh, Megyn.

    Megyn Kelly
    @megynkelly

    Not sure who misled you on this, sir, but you don’t control us.

    Tom Elliott
    @tomselliott

    Fauci on if Americans might be able to finally schedule a wedding this year: “That’s a good question … I can’t give you that exact date”

  34. Agent Cooper

    Link thoughts:

    1. RE: CNN and Florida. Trump is gone so the narrative is more malleable.
    2. No one cares about Asian “whores” — gun control rears it’s head most when white kids in safe liberal enclaves die.
    3. BIDEN SAY RELAX

  35. juris imprudent

    Couple of interesting observations in Williamson.

    People lost their minds over the racial aspects of The Bell Curve, but what is really socially disruptive about Charles Murray’s thesis in that book is that there isn’t really any meritocracy — if the most important life outcomes are conditioned on an immutable and largely hereditary gift that cannot be acquired through hard work and dedication, then you have an intellectual caste system, not a meritocracy.

    Americans who are dissatisfied with what we call for lack of a better term “globalization” tend to assume that the Chinese are very satisfied with it. They aren’t. Americans see certain kinds of work moving to China (or to other foreign countries) and feel like we are being put upon by wily competitors “stealing our jobs.” But Beijing’s view of China’s relationship with Apple, to take one example, is that China imports some wages but exports most of the profits, and that this is a raw deal.

    • rhywun

      There’s a reason Apple marks all its products “Designed in California”….

      • Bob

        DeWalt, ” Made in the USA, with globally sourced parts”

      • Festus

        “Sourced” is the magic word.

  36. Rebel Scum

    I think that’s the point.

    Having been an independent contractor for 7 years, I understand why 9/10 independent workers prefer their status.

    Nationalizing California’s ABC test would destroy the gig economy.

    Secretary Su’s position is anathema to the future of our nation’s small businesses.

  37. The Late P Brooks

    Imagine this: You’re stranded on a raft in the middle of the ocean, along with a CEO, a doctor, a musician, a student, and an unemployed person. There’s a hole in the floor and the raft is slowly filling with water. It can hold the weight of only five people. One of you has to go. Who do you throw overboard?

    I wonder if this person is even knowledgeable enough to know “lifeboat ethics” is a pre-existing school of philosophy.

    • Bob

      Stick the questioners head in the hole,
      Problem solved,

      • UnCivilServant

        The head is too fat for the hole.

      • Not Adahn

        Not if you push hard enough.

      • Agent Cooper

        Use the head as a second flotation device?

      • TARDis

        It wouldn’t work ’cause it’s filled with rocks.

    • db

      Maybe they need an engineer to tell them it doesn’t matter how many people they throw overboard; a boat with a hole in it is still going to sink.

      Or maybe they could take turns bailing.

      Stupidly framed questions make for stupid “lessons.”

      • Ownbestenemy

        Yeah…lose the hole in the raft and it makes more sense, but can’t expect that type of thought in this when I am guessing they are hoping most say ‘throw out the CEO!”

      • UnCivilServant

        I’d chuck both the musician and the student. They’re dead weight. We can retrain the unemployed person as a water bailer.

      • Not Adahn

        If there was a ballet dancer, you could use them as an outboard motor.

      • db

        Gotta give you props for that one.

    • Sean

      This is why you should always travel with a can of Flex Seal.

      • Gender Traitor

        Can we throw the spokesguy from those commercials overboard anyway?

    • Pope Jimbo

      Who do you throw overboard?

      Easy! The one with the smallest tits. It really is just the opposite of the “who do you hire” question.

      • UnCivilServant

        *chucks Jimbo overboard*

      • Pope Jimbo

        THIS IS WHY YOU NEVER GO BOATING WITH CHUCK SCHUMER!!!!!

      • Not Adahn

        If you secured him under the boat, wouldn’t that increase the overall bouyancy?

      • Suthenboy

        Well, he is a gas bag.

    • R C Dean

      First, you ask for volunteers.

      Then, if you don’t have any volunteers, you look at who has useful skills. You can’t really tell from their job title, you know. A neurosurgeon is unlikely to have much to offer, unless xe sails for a hobby or somesuch.

      Then, you look at who weighs the most. Your problem is weight, right? Why would you throw the 130 pound CEO overboard when you’ve got a 300 pound doctor with no useful skills in this situation?

      OK, the first thing you do is mock the scenario and whoever proposed it, because its stupid, and likely they are too.

      • UnCivilServant

        We also don’t know important factors – distance to shore, depth of water, temperature of water, location of boat, weather conditions, the list goes on.

      • Pine_Tree

        Also – “First we’re going to try to figure something out. But regardless, I’m not gonna let you murder me or any other innocent person here. And if you try, I will fight you, commie. So yeah, we’re probably going to end up with at least one fewer person on here, but not the way you think.”

  38. juris imprudent

    I wish this kind of thinking was the norm in our foreign policy establishment.

    One of the paradoxes of the Chinese position is that those that pose the greatest strategic risk are also essential elements of the Chinese economy. Seizing an island off of Taiwan might trigger a U.S. response, but it would convince the alliance members of Chinese danger and force them, with U.S. support, to take economic action.

    • juris imprudent

      that should’ve been block quoted

    • db

      The main issue I have with that analysis is demonstrated by these passages:

      During the Cold War, the U.S. was on the defensive against a Russian attack that never came. Similarly, during World War II, Washington saw Japan as utterly dependent on raw materials from the south and assumed a direct thrust southward. It could not conceive that Japan would launch an indirect attack. In both cases, the U.S. ignored reality. Russian constraints militated against offensive war. Japanese constraints militated against direct attack…

      Later,

      This creates a long stretch of chokepoints that could block China’s access to the oceans and thus hurt domestic economic development and potentially generate social unrest. The United States has not blocked China’s access, nor has it threatened to. But China must consider what is possible, and the capability the U.S. has is a profound threat to China. From the U.S. point of view, moving eastward from the Aleutian-Malacca line would give China entree to the Pacific, which would threaten fundamental U.S. interests. The U.S. cannot abandon the alliance. China cannot accept the threat.

      Early in the article, the author takes the U.S. to task for misunderstanding the limitations and capabilities of its adversaries, and for assuming the worst. Later, he says China must consider the U.S. capability to block Chinese access to sea lanes, even though the U.S. has not threatened to do so, and “has no appetite for war.” These two statements, while not completely opposite, tend to weaken the argument–what is right, to overestimate the adversary’s intentions, or to overestimate their limitations? It’s a delicate question, but you can’t have it both ways all the time.

      Also, the author writes:

      The Soviets were focused on reconstruction after World War II, something that required decades of work. A war that would devastate Western Europe gave them no incentive to start a war. The United States, meanwhile, was obsessed with counting equipment, not evaluating the ability of the Soviet logistical system to support a massive offensive. The U.S. focused on worst-case intentions and capabilities. The real ones were very different.

      Similarly to the situation with China, perhaps the U.S. strategists were not focused on the Soviet Union’s current capabilities, but on what their capabilities might be if they were allowed to reconstruct their manufacturing capabilities without interference or misdirection (keep in mind that some have postulated that the U.S. focus on military hardware forced the Soviet Union to engage in an economically destructive arms race, that their command economy could, in the long term, not survive. Perhaps the strategists in both situations wish to forestall the adversary’s development, or to redirect it into unproductive pathways.

      • db

        As in chess, a good player tries to think as many moves ahead as is possible. You don’t just sit around and assume that because the capability isn’t there right now, that it won’t develop in the future. As people’s capabilities change, their intentions do too, especially at the international level.

      • juris imprudent

        Our post-war response to the USSR was a reaction as much to FDR’s stupidity as it was to anything inherent in Stalin’s actions. If anything the true internationalist threat (Trotsky) had already been exiled and murdered.

        Churchill recognized the validity of a sphere of influence, and FDR, being a disciple of Wilson, did not.

      • db

        I think what you’re saying there is that the post-WWII U.S. strategists were trying to ensure that the mistakes FDR made were not repeated, by trying to influence the potential shape of future conflicts, which I would agree with.

        Not to keep pounding on the point, but Stalin’s focus on rebuilding the USSR and cementing control internally doesn’t foreclose the possibility that, once he achieved success in those endeavors, he or his successor wouldn’t turn his attention outward.

      • Psycho Effer

        WWII was a war between Progressivism, Nazism, and Communism. Progressivism and Communism exterminated Nazism, then did their best to destroy each other. In the end, Communism consumed Progressivism from the inside, but the Soviet Union had to die in order for it’s corpse to infect the US with its disease.

      • juris imprudent

        I’d say it was an over-correction to FDR. Had a more realistic perspective been embraced from the start, the over-correction wouldn’t have happened (or been necessary). Even Kennan concluded we’d gone overboard and he was the prime mover.

        FDR’s stupidity was also to blame for our view on China (and the subsequent Republican charge of “who lost China” and all the damage that flowed from that).

      • db

        Possibly an overreaction, yes. I’d imagine it’s pretty delicate when you get into messing with another nation’s internal affairs to affect their decision making and development of their capabilities. You establish yourself as anything but a friend, and not to be trusted, which can backfire badly.

        Are you referring to the “loss of China” post WWII, or more recently? It seems a lot of ink has been spilled on how China has been “lost” by policies intending to open them up to international trade backfiring and giving them way more power over global supply chains than might be healthy. I certainly used to be strongly in favor of the idea that global trade would get China to behave in order to be accepted in the world community, but they seem to be doing things with it that should have been predicted, but weren’t.

      • juris imprudent

        We weren’t friends before the war, and we were only allies of convenience during – again, Churchill understood this, FDR did not. Our policy was driven by the mistakes he made.

        The post-WWII loss, though you can see similarity in the mistakes of more recent vintage – we will convert China into a friendly (read subservient) Western-style system by engagement. That was never a view that took into account Chinese interests. And this is what we do over and over again – we superimpose our view and assume that everyone else will adopt it because – why wouldn’t they want to be exactly like us. It is the most arrogant and egotistical nonsense imaginable – it is the international version of “I know what’s best for you better than you do”.

      • Psycho Effer

        I don’t think that anyone predicted that the CCP would go full Nazi. They are full-blown Nazis with death camps, and a command economy with the illusion of free enterprise.

      • R C Dean

        The Soviets were focused on reconstruction after World War II, something that required decades of work.

        How investing in a massive military machine is “reconstruction” is an exercise for the reader, I suppose.

      • db

        I’m being facetious here, but in communism, isn’t production all that matters? Doesn’t matter what you make, as long as the factories and labor are fully utilized. Might as well make a few teratons of military equipment, since that’s what your industry was set up to do for the duration of WWII.

      • R C Dean

        Its not hard to repurpose military production for civilian use.

      • db

        I guess they *were* the ones who supposedly perfected the beating of swords into plowshares.

  39. Rebel Scum

    Pass.

    Rep. John Katko (R-N.Y.) last week introduced a resolution calling on Biden to take executive actions to create “National COVID-19 Vaccination Awareness Day.”

    The purpose of the holiday would be to “act as a galvanizing moment to promote the more rapid distribution” of vaccines to all areas of the country and “increase public awareness of the important role of vaccination” for a return to normalcy. …

    “We must encourage more Americans to get vaccinated while continuing to collaborate with federal, state, and local leaders to ensure rapid and equitable distribution. Americans can rest assured that there is an end in sight, and together, we will emerge from this pandemic stronger than before,” he said.

    Democratic Reps. Abigail Spanberger of Virginia and Josh Gottheimer of New Jersey have co-sponsored the measure.

    • Festus

      Yup. How do you communicate “Go Fuck Yerself” in ASL? Wait, I know.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      “Shared Destiny. Shared Responsibility”? ??

    • Ownbestenemy

      Well your messaging is “get the vaccine and still live under our boot” isn’t going to sway a lot of people

      • Rebel Scum

        I, for one, welcome our new medical/climate overlords.

    • Sean

      They want an annual “event”, because they want to make booster shots an annual thing.

      That’s not even tin foil territory at this point.

      • Not Adahn

        They’ve to to change out the battery in the implanted 5G transmitter somehow.

      • Sean

        …and now we’re into tin foil territory. ?

  40. Festus

    Retreaded from the last thread. Dr. Bonnie (PBUH) saw fit to shut down all liquor sales on St. Paddies Day @ 20:00. For the children. Fuck you, we all bought ahead! She is the perfect example of most of the girls that I went to high school with except she never lost her virginity at a graduation party and then had an abortion.

    • Festus

      That’s fucking heartbreaking. 2010, the year we gave up.

  41. Rebel Scum

    Good.

    The Alaska Republican Party has censured U.S. Sen. Lisa Murkowski for voting to convict former President Donald Trump at his impeachment trial and now doesn’t want her to identify as a GOP candidate in next year’s election, a member of the party’s State Central Committee said Tuesday.

    “The party does not want Lisa Murkowski to be a Republican candidate,” said Tuckerman Babcock, immediate past chairman of the state party.

    The vote to censure Murkowski was 53-17 at a Saturday meeting in Anchorage, he said. The decision has not been publicly announced by the party.

    “It went further than censure, which was strong,” Babcock said. “But it also directed the party officials to recruit an opponent in the election and to the extent legally permissible, prevent Lisa Murkowski from running as a Republican in any election,” he said.

    • Festus

      Sarah starts back on her spin class,.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Didn’t she already lose one primary and then ran and won as a write in?

      Maybe that is when you don’t let her back into the party?

      • Raven Nation

        Yep. Back in the W presidency I think.

    • R C Dean

      to the extent legally permissible, prevent Lisa Murkowski from running as a Republican in any election

      I’m wondering what law prohibits a political party from saying who can claim to be a member.

  42. The Late P Brooks

    Despite far more stringent restrictions, California only ranks one spot better than Florida in both measures. Its death rate is about 5% lower than Florida’s, which means about 1,500 lives could have been saved in Florida if the state’s death rate matched that of California.

    WTFSRSLY?

    Whoever wrote that should be tied to a post and whipped with a knotted plow line.

    • R C Dean

      Give it time. CA’s death rate is twice that of FL’s now.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Some people pay extra for that.

  43. Sean

    https://www.cbs58.com/news/nasa-names-27-asteroids-after-african-american-hispanic-and-native-american-astronauts

    The new names honor African American, Hispanic and Native American astronauts, and one cosmonaut to inspire the next generation.

    Marc W. Buie, an astronomer who discovered the 27 asteroids, told NASA it was “an honor and a privilege to name these asteroids in recognition of fellow space explorers while also adding to the message of the power and value of diversity for all human endeavors.”

    Before, these asteroids were originally named in relation to their position in space, but now José Hernández gets to look up knowing that his asteroid, (122554) Joséhernández, is in orbit.

    “We named a floating rock after you.”

    So woke.

    • rhywun

      *barf*

    • Ownbestenemy

      I prefer this

      Having some Guinness later on

    • Ownbestenemy

      We loved Moone Boy!

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Where’s K-Sue? Will buy him pints for stories about the ould sod. I picture him as the Hibernian version of the Mackenzies in How I Married an Axe Murderer.

    • CPRM

      I watched a few episodes but never finished it. Mayhaps I’ll revisit it. I recently binged Family Tree with Chris O’Dowd.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Aw, ta CPRM!

  44. Rebel Scum

    China is going to eat our lunch.

    Extremism can tear apart cohesive teams.

    Col. Timothy Holman is the Army’s chief diversity officer and his aim is clear: do what he can to help open a path for future Army leaders and make the force as diverse as the nation it defends.

    Indeed. Extreme, woke racist ideology will ruin teams, particularly in a military setting.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Mortars flying over head and exploding all around you and your new fireteam leader will be making sure no one is offended by xe’s words first, will personally frag a white person for every diverse soldier killed in the shelling and then will have a struggle session for an after action report.

    • wdalasio

      What if they held the next war and nobody came?

      This pushing of “woke” politics in the U.S. military, as well as the purges of politically incorrect officers has to eventually translate into consequences for recruiting. Just not, I think, in the way they seem to anticipate. The young men (and, yes, they inevitably are young men) we rely on to fight our wars, on the ground, up close and personal, don’t particularly strike me as fitting in with the woke crowd. And the politics seems pretty directed at telling them they aren’t welcome. But, even if woke didn’t exist, progressive liberal arts majors don’t really seem to me prime candidates for the military. No matter how much the military tells them that they’re woke too, my gut instinct is that these kids aren’t going to be running out to risk getting shot at.

      • Pine_Tree

        My oldest son is in basic at Benning right now (one-station-unit-training for Infantry, so Basic and Advanced are together). He says there are a few wokesters there. Who apparently thought that their platoon bay was an appropriate place for political rants.

      • Chipwooder

        Motherfuckers woulda gotten their asses beaten for that shit in my shops. We didn’t talk politics on the job.

      • Pine_Tree

        Evidently the wokester issue was handled via verbal and peer-pressure modes. Physical disincentivizing for other offenses is still a thing, I hear.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        +1 Invitation to the woodline

      • Gustave Lytton

        Benning in winter was fun. I didn’t realize how cold Georgia could get, especially not after starting off in the humid sauna called “fall”. I don’t think there was a range day between November and February that didn’t have frozen sandbags in the morning.

      • Pine_Tree

        Yeah, we live really close, too, and he grew up deer hunting.

        But some of the mornings in Feb it was like 29-35 all day and drizzling, and they stood in formation outside for 3 hours before breakfast. No rain gear or anything.

        I know that’s not Minnesoda cold, but still.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        Fort Lewis in January was effing miserable. Thirty-three degrees and misty drizzle all friggin day makes for a shitty day on the range.

      • Pope Jimbo

        If there is a major war, I think that the tradition of fragging officers will come back in a big way.

        The divide between college educated officers and the enlisted men will be wider than it ever has been before. The first time some officer decides to use their woke goggles to make decisions, I can see his troops solving their problems fairly quickly.

        What will be really interesting is what happens to squads and platoons that are co-ed. How long before women in combat units demand to be let out of combat units? What will happen to a squad that is mixed when the men realize that the women simply can’t physically keep up? Do you get shot up to prove a point? And what do you do in the field to survive? Just combine with some other squad and make one fighting unit of men and send all the women to the rear?

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        What will happen to a squad that is mixed when the men realize that the women simply can’t physically keep up?

        “The saying is ‘no man left behind'”

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        In seriousness, do they think our enemies are going to be cordial to our female POWs? I can’t think of a single military occupation over the past 100 years that didn’t have some level of systemic rape associated with it, and we’d be serving these women up on a platter.

      • db

        I suppose you could end up with a situation where women would always fight to the death, knowing that, if captured, they’d be in for some rough treatment. If it happens enough, the enemy might learn that they can’t take women soldiers alive, and will probably lose a couple guys to a frag if they try.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I’m sure the PLA has learned from its shameful history of raping Uyghur women and will treat US female POW’s with utmost respect.

    • juris imprudent

      US Army on Twitter reminds me of the demotivational poster – none of us is as stupid individually as we all are together.

    • db

      So, my initial reaction to Travis Corcoran’s highlighting of wokeism in the military seemed farfetched to me, and likely to turn off a lot of potential readers because of its over-the-top depiction of diversity in the military gone wild.

      Maybe I should re-think that reaction?

      • The Other Kevin

        I’m re-thinking a lot of things lately. Things I heard on talk radio years ago, that seemed completely over the top, are now being openly pushed by Democrats.

      • Chipwooder

        Yup. Stuff that I dismissed as loony five years ago has been coming true at an alarming rate.

    • The Other Kevin

      There is a shortage of cops right now, and it’s getting worse, due to all the “defund police” talk and antifa catch-and-release policies. Cops are retiring early and there are not enough replacements. It won’t be long until we have the same in the military. They better have a good recruiting plan, they’re going to need it.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        They have a great plan. It’s 5 letters long, starts with D and ends with raft.

  45. KromulentKristen

    Rob Lowe <3

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Have you heard his podcast, or read either of his memoirs? Dude seems legitimately charming.

      • KromulentKristen

        He really seems to have escaped his Hollyweird yoot and become a sane, normal (very handsome) guy.

      • Psycho Effer

        He identified himself as libertarian on Rogan last year.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        No! Get out of the city! In at least one of the memoirs he was photographically proud to have helped spur Prop. 65. ?

      • KromulentKristen

        That was the 1980’s – he’s spoken a bit about his evolution politically (though not much – he generally stays out of the nastier politics that people like Adam Baldwin wade into)

      • Pope Jimbo

        The ’80s was when he was pioneering the celebrity sex tape at the Democratic National Convention?

        *I didn’t remember that one of the gals in that romp was only 16. How times have changed.

      • KromulentKristen

        Yep he had an R Kelly-type scandal. He did a Robert Downey Jr. and turned himself around, personally & politically.

      • KromulentKristen

        Yep – he’s known in Hollywood “conservative” circles

      • Pope Jimbo

        I haven’t, but when I caught the Comedy Central Roast of him, I was impressed by how well he took the ribbing and also by how most of the roasters genuinely seemed to like him.

      • KromulentKristen

        He’s very nice to fans, too. And his kids seem like well-adjusted young’uns (IIRC they’re both in very good universities, and not actors)

    • Chipwooder

      He’s one of those guys like Jason Bateman who never ages. Like, at all. I look older than both of those guys despite being 10+ years younger.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Rob Lowe, RDJ, and Matthew McConaughey, to me, seem like legitimately good men. I watched RDJ on Rogan and he seems to have figured himself out better than most and McConaughey’s interview with JBP is pretty amazing, I had no idea that he was as thoughtful and purposeful about his life. McConaughey was something of a surprise, I put him into the woo-woo healing crystals box a while back.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    “What I’d love to ask about Florida is, if we had done things differently in Florida, what would it have looked like?” Salemi told CNN. “If you use those metrics of where Florida is relative to a lot of other states, we’re looking middle of the pack. So no, it hasn’t been a disaster in that we’re leading in mortality per capita in cases per capita.”

    He added: “It’s not always about doing well relative to your peers. It’s how can we prevent as much morbidity and mortality from the virus while keeping an eye on what’s happening with our economy.”

    He said Florida has also benefitted from local ordinances requiring masks and restricting the sizes of gatherings. DeSantis has prohibited cities and counties from fining people for refusing to wear masks and is stirring outrage among local officials by pushing to strip their authority to put such rules in place at all.

    Haha, GOTCHA! If you had locked down hard, how many of those people would have survived? Thousands. Prove me wrong.

    And then, in the next paragraph, he says everybody ignored Desantis and did the right (according to Foochy, et al) thing, despite the governor’s desperate attempts to prevent them from saving lives and making the world a better place. What credit there is belongs to those noble local politicians and health experts who defied the death cultists.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Curious that no reporter is applying that hypothetical in the other direction other than to say if they didn’t put the boot to the neck, more would have died.

    • juris imprudent

      It’s actually amusing how they just can’t seem to grok that it really doesn’t matter WHAT the govt does, the virus is going to do what viruses do.

  47. Rebel Scum

    We have Cicada swarms for May. Who had volcanoes for March?

    Iceland has recorded more than 50,000 earthquakes in the past three weeks.

    This unusual activity indicates a volcanic eruption is on its way.

    Scientists are baffled over when it will happen and Icelanders are learning to live with the shakes.

    • PieInTheSky

      I blame climate change.

      • juris imprudent

        Gaia says “you want to see some climate change”?

  48. The Hyperbole

    Just had to call the law on my neighbor’s dogs, luckily no man or beast got shot.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Unless that dog was gnawing on a human being why would you do that?

      • The Hyperbole

        Bit me, running loose and I live in a highly foot traffic-ed area. Didn’t want to hear of some little kid getting mauled because I did nothing.

      • Ownbestenemy

        See acceptable in my book.

      • Festus

        Yep. Unless you were unable to cave its skull in, that’s acceptable. Sucks, though. Now all those assholes are going to make you build pinochle boards for them because you called them and now they know your secret.

      • PieInTheSky

        How to Kill Your Neighbor’s Dog was a movie back in the day

        I still somehow remember this quote

        ” Cunnilingus. I’ve been reading that word since I was 13 and I still can’t seem to wrap my tounge around it. Wait… was that a pun, or just bad taste? Wait… that may have been another pun. “

      • Not Adahn

        Bit me

        Yeah, at that point, it’s on like Donkey Kong.

        Unless you were breaking into the guy’s house or something.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I hated to do it but called the police on a neighbor’s dogs a few years ago. They snuck under my back farmgate and killed several expensive heritage breed chickens. I caught both of them and at that point would have been well within my right to put them down on the spot.

        They were sweet dogs though so I didn’t want to do that. Didn’t know which neighbor they belonged too and couldn’t find any contact info on either dog to call them directly. I called the sheriff to come take them away as the kinder alternative. The neighbors picked them up later that day. They had a large fine and got chewed out by the sheriff. Livestock/poultry killing is taken very seriously around here.

        I bolted plywood under the gate to prevent future incursions, but I think the neighbor kept better control anyway after that incident.

      • The Hyperbole

        The cop and the dog warden/animal control woman went to talk to them, the dogs were back in their yard by the time the got here, but the neighbors wouldn’t answer the door, they said they’d continue to try and get a hold of them and that if the dogs get out again they’ll be fined. Hopefully they’ll secure their fencing better, I haven’t noticed but my other neighbor said they get out often.

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        I had to file a police report on a dog that bit me several years ago in order to get the guy’s insurance company to cover my doctor bills. Apparently the going rate for a dog bite was about $40K, so I could have taken him for more. The dog had nipped at me before when I was bike riding with my daughter, so I probably should have taken the money. I told him that the next time the dog goes after me I would kill the dog and go to court to own his ranch.

  49. The Late P Brooks

    Col. Timothy Holman is the Army’s chief diversity officer

    I remember when you could buy a poster to put on your wal which read (more or less):

    Join the Army

    Travel to exotic, far-off lands

    Meet people from unique ancient cultures

    And KILL THEM

    • Rat on a train

      Now they kill with kindness.

      • Festus

        Fentanyl?

  50. Sean

    LOL

  51. Rebel Scum

    Kill whitey.

    After a white professor claimed he was discriminated against for his “whiteness,” a petition that has garnered almost 1,000 signatures is calling for his resignation. …

    In the video, Kindsvatter said he strongly opposes new curriculum policies set forth that promote what he calls discrimination against white people.

    “There’s a new kind of discrimination on campus that’s going on, that I really feel that we need to talk about,” Kindsvatter said in the first video. “And I think that everybody is afraid to talk about and this discrimination is against whiteness.”

    Kindsvatter defines whiteness as a concept that stems from critical social justice.

    “It’s a manifestation of our most anti-intellectual tribal impulses cloaked in an intellectual veneer,” Kindsvatter stated in an email to the Cynic. “It is a way of dehumanizing people in order to meet or gain compliance with political ends.”

    Yes, they mean to control you.

    Senior Josephine Mercado, President, and founder of UVM Sisters of Color Started the petition. Social justice work is not a priority for UVM SOC, Mercado said, but as her concern for the safety of her sisters grew as she continued watching Kindsvatter’s video, so did her motivation to act.

    “I just felt deep deep sadness at the fact this is a UVM professor, this is an educator, this is a counselor. This is someone who is obligated by UVM Common Ground values to protect students, especially the students of color who have been repeated victims…on campus,” she said.

    If college is such an emotionally devastating place for you then you probably shouldn’t be there.

    • juris imprudent

      It is known that colleges are rape factories and yet young women are clamoring to get in.

      • Festus

        It is known that 18-22 year old girls need rape. Chicks crave it! I can’t even anymore. Can I get some Alzhiemers over here to go? Just put it on my tab, dear.

      • Chipwooder

        It is known that 18-22 year old girls need rape. Chicks crave it!

        Didn’t Bernie Sanders once say exactly that?

      • DEG

        Snopes rates this claim true.

        Though, they do backpedal a bit and say he is making a broader point plus men fantasize about raping women.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Doh!

      • DEG

        🙂

    • Chipwooder

      “safety”

  52. The Late P Brooks

    “I just felt deep deep sadness at the fact this is a UVM professor, this is an educator, this is a counselor. This is someone who is obligated by UVM Common Ground values to protect students, especially the students of color who have been repeated victims…on campus,” she said.

    That’s odd. I thought a college professor’s obligation was to educate his/her students, with factually correct and conceptually robust principles.

    • juris imprudent

      Ha! Shows what you know. A college professor is a babysitter for post-adolescents.

    • Suthenboy

      What is this ‘POC victimized on campus’ crap? I hear it all the time but never any examples.

      • EvilSheldon

        They’re victims of insufficient coddling.

    • R C Dean

      This is someone who is obligated by UVM Common Ground values to protect students, especially the students of color

      Overt racism, on at least two dimensions, right there.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I’m at the point where I’m done being quiet about this shit. I’ll not volunteer my opinion, but when asked, I’m calling a spade a spade.

      • Not Adahn

        especially the students of color

        Plural? In Vermont?

  53. Not Adahn

    Floriday Man arrested for jacking it in public with a pickle shoved up his ass.

    Yes, he lives in a trailer park.

    • Chipwooder

      Sadly, he didn’t even get a chance to eat the pickle

    • Sean

      Pickle Fucker!

      • Festus

        That is a really funny movie!

      • Festus

        It also makes me want to dance with abandon with Rosario Dawson.

    • EvilSheldon

      “Jail records note that Detiege has “Only God can judge me” tattooed on his arm.”

      Um, I hate to break it to you buddy…

    • DEG

      He looks…. happy.

      • Suthenboy

        You misspelled ‘nuts’.

    • Pope Jimbo

      with a pickle shoved up his ass

      Is that not kosher?

      • db

        No, Other Barry, that is *not*.

      • Pope Jimbo

        So it was sort of a big dill and the cops were right to hassle him?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Florida Man is a police force’s bread and butter

    • Old Man With Candy

      Did he carve it from wood?

  54. Festus

    Growing another sty in my right eye. It must be because I touch my own asshole at night, right?

    • Not Adahn

      They sell plugs to prevent that.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Staph?

    • KromulentKristen

      BDE

  55. The Late P Brooks

    Apropos of nothing-

    My new replacement Mr Coffee el cheapo coffee maker is, in every way (ergonomically, functionally, aesthetically…), inferior to its predecessor. That’s quite an achievement.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Cone or basket?

  56. The Late P Brooks

    Basket.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Don’t know what your old model was, but basket, ugh.

  57. Bill Door

    Why shouldn’t DeSantis take credit? Cuomo took credit, and a farcical Emmy, but I repeat myself, and tried sweeping things under the rug. I’m pretty sure DeSantis doesn’t have a closet full of dead seniors, so he should take credit, and be lauded for how he has handled things. Though not perfect, there are few other states that have been as good on the coof as Florida.

    If CNN weren’t so laughable it would be sad.

    • juris imprudent

      Relevant. No easy to pull snippet to summarize – the whole read is good.

      • Bill Door

        Thanks. I’ll give it a read.

  58. Muzzled Woodchipper

    France’s antitrust authorities will be looking into Apple’s (AAPL) – Get Report App Tracking Transparency feature on its upcoming iOS 14 software update.

    The effort follows complaints from French advertisers that the way the feature is designed will prevent them from being able to generate revenue from user data, media reports say.

    Fuck off, French advertisers. Since when is it your right to have any access to my data, much less track it and generate revenue from it?

    https://www.thestreet.com/investing/apple-ios-14-faces-french-antitrust-inquiry

    • R C Dean

      French anti-trust law must be really weird. Apple is sharing its information on what apps it has authorized with its customers. The only conceivable anti-trust issue there is the tight control Apple exercises over what apps it allows on its devices. But I seriously doubt that anyone really wants to say that its illegal to restrict what software is run on a device. For starters, that would make anti-virus software illegal, since its only purpose is to restrict what software is run on the devices it is installed on.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The difference between a legislator and an administrative exec who just got handed a shit ton of money (not that it makes it right).

    • Pope Jimbo

      If he returned the money, would it simply be re-allocated to another state? You know the Feds are hell bent on wasting that money, so returning it won’t do any good even if it is the right thing to do.

    • rhywun

      Someone’s got his eye on a future election.

  59. Ownbestenemy

    Try this again….

    We feed radar data to Nellis AFB and they barely have any competent technicians to troubleshoot when we have issues. We verify that once it hits our fiber, its all good so the issue is either telco or on their end. For two weeks they kept trying to throw it back at me that the issue was on my side.

    Checked in to this morning to patch some modems to known good lines and I get “well our night crew did some work last night and everything is working now”….fuckers. Just flat out lazy or have no idea what the hell they are doing.

    • Pope Jimbo

      One of my pet peeves is when someone fixes a bug or an issue and doesn’t fess up and let people know. Especially in cases like your’s where everyone has been chasing an intermittent issue for a while.

      Be a man. Admit that you fucked up, but now it is fixed. People can move on. Keeping it a secret just wastes everyone’s time.

      Same thing as when things go bad and you ask them “what was the last thing you changed” and they get upset because there is NO way their minor, tiny, insignificant change could have caused any problems. It isn’t personal, dude, it is just basic troubleshooting.

      • Ownbestenemy

        That is exactly it. I don’t care what you did, just tell me so I can log it and note it so next time (which it will happen cause airmen are constantly training) it happens we save a week and ask you to check it. I never understood why people take it personal. Our goal is to have operational equipment provided to our customers.

  60. Rebel Scum

    No.

    Biden: “I urge all local docs and ministers and priests to talk about why it’s important to get that vaccine. And even after that, until everyone is in fact vaccinated, to wear this mask.”

    • R C Dean

      And even after that, until everyone is in fact vaccinated, to wear this mask.

      The logic of this escapes me. If you have to wear a mask after you are vaccinated, why would this change when everyone is vaccinated? Either the vaccine makes masking superfluous, or it doesn’t.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Its a hole they dug so deep they figured why not dig until you get to China. It is the only way out of it and it is the Government’s way of dealing with policy they fucked up?

      • R C Dean

        My schtick now is to not wear a mask. If specifically asked to put it on, I will say I’ve been vaccinated, so I don’t need to. If they continue to demand I mask (and I decide I need to finish my errand rather than leave), I will put it on below my nose. If they start bitching about that, I will point out that I at least have a surgical mask, and not a cloth mask like they are wearing, which has been shown to increase aerosoization of exhaled breath, and thus risk of infecting others. If they still want to engage, I leave.

        So far, nobody has asked me to put on a mask, but I don’t run many errands, either.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Since the mandate was dropped this week, I’ve started making a list of places that still require masks. I no longer patronize establishments that require masks.

        That reminds me, I need a new liquor store.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      “everyone”
      Ueah, good luck with that.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Mr. President, if enough of the elderly and other at risk people get the vaccine that the amount of daily deaths drops to zero, do you think it is still necessary to continue vaccinating people?

      • Pope Jimbo

        Where are the Medical Ethicists when you need them?

        You would think that someone in charge would point out that kids have a 0% chance of dying and it would be hard to see how the risk of taking an unneeded vaccine could be less than that.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      I urge all local docs and ministers and priests to talk about why it’s important to get that vaccine.

      This exposes a few things about their thinking. First, it shows that they see the icky Jesus folk as being connected with covid skepticism. Second, it shows how they see this as a moral/ideological fight, not a public health one.

      I’m starting to feel rather like an enemy of the state because of my faith. This isn’t the most egregious example, but it’s yet another continuation of the bitter clingers trope.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Muslims, wiccans and atheists hardest hit by Covid?

      • Ownbestenemy

        It is quite a pretzel they have put themselves in. For a year, states and even the federal governments have said your faith can be limited and will be limited and now they are turning to those people, who for a year, were at odds with these officials to pitch their plan?

        Places of worship should say “So now you see us a integral to our society? Fuck off”

    • Pope Jimbo

      Sex is like leftovers? Always better fresh and not as good when re-heated.

    • Pope Jimbo

      If it is impossible for a drunk/fucked up woman to give consent, why are the men who are just as drunk/fucked up held responsible for rape?

      If intoxication is a get out of jail free card for some, why not for all?

      • Pope Jimbo

        I’m thinking that a guy should say “I was super drunk and never consented either to have sex with her, I am also a rape victim of my drunken Mr. Hyde”.

  61. The Late P Brooks

    My schtick now is to not wear a mask. If specifically asked to put it on, I will say I’ve been vaccinated, so I don’t need to. If they continue to demand I mask (and I decide I need to finish my errand rather than leave), I will put it on below my nose. If they start bitching about that, I will point out that I at least have a surgical mask, and not a cloth mask like they are wearing, which has been shown to increase aerosoization of exhaled breath, and thus risk of infecting others. If they still want to engage, I leave.

    I might ask the next person who wants me to mask up to explain the mechanics of masking.

    “What does it do? Whom does it protect? Wait here while I get my bear spray.”

  62. The Late P Brooks

    Second, it shows how they see this as a moral/ideological fight, not a public health one.

    It is so infuriating to hear people talking about how Trump and his robot army “politicized” masks, when it was the people on the other side who began accusing anybody who doesn’t meekly wear a mask as being immoral to the point of willful murder.