Joemala: Episode 21

by | Apr 14, 2021 | Joemala, SugarFree | 174 comments

 

“You guys also got the Johnson and Johnson shot?” Seresto asked.

“Yeah,” Kaylieburrow said glumly, her voice wandering around the ceramic spaces of the bathroom.

“I don’t want a blood clot in my brain,” Asterix said, gnawing at the skin on the side of them thumb.

“You be fine,” Seresto said. “It only affects women.”

“I’m a woman, dammit,” Asterix said in an angry whisper, slapping them LUPA.

“Stop deadgentialing yourself,” Seresto and Kaylieburrow said in unison and giggled.

“Everyone shut up!” Kamala said from the stall. “I’m trying to Willie Brown over here!”

“Does that mean, you know, or pooping?” Kaylieburrow asked, almost mouthing the words, miming clicking a mouse.

“Both!” Seresto wrote on her phone and thrust it at Asterix.

Asterix opened them mouth, stuck a finger in, and mimed vomiting.

“What are you doing out there?!?” Kamala demanding, groaning.

“Nothing, ma’am!” Kaylieburrow sang.

“How is the gun control campaign going? You’re supposed to be following that!” Kamala grunted.

“There’s been an uptick in support for gun violence prevention measures since the recent shootings,” Seresto said, “But not enough to go forward with legislation.”

“Then we need more shootings, dammit. Activate the next set of shooters!” Kamala growled.

“But, ma’am, they aren’t supposed to come online until late April,” Kaylieburrow said in a high, frightened voice.

“After that Nation of Islam idiot, we need more white shooters,” Kamala said.

“The riots in Minnesota are going well,” Asterix said.

“The what?” Kamala demanded.

“Sorry, ma’am,” them muttered. “The Righteous Citizen Uprising in Minnesota is going well.”

“I need that money to run in 2024,” Kamala said. “BLM honkies love forking over money. Are we sure Chavin is going to get acquitted?”

“I think we are headed for another summer of rage no matter what happens,” Asterix said.

“Excellent,” Kamala muttered and then groaned again, a groan that went on and on.

“Ma’am?” Kaylieburrow asked.

“Get out, get out, it’s the big one!” Kamala managed.

Asterix, Seresto, and Kaylieburrow scrambled for the bathroom door, shoving each other like they were in a nightclub fire.

Kamala screamed.

Kaylieburrow was pushed to the sticky floor and lightly trampled.

“Help! I’m being lightly trampled!” she cried as Seresto and Asterix shot out into the hallway.

About The Author

SugarFree

SugarFree

Your Resident Narcissistic Misogynist Rape-Culture Apologist

174 Comments

  1. DEG

    LUPA?

    “lightly trampled”. Heh.

    • SugarFree

      Lean Upper Pussy Area (compare to FUPA (Fat Upper Pussy Area.))

      • DEG

        Ah. Thanks!

  2. CPRM

    I don’t get it. What is the style here? Hannah Barbara?

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Monty Python,

      • CPRM

        Terry Gilliam is great director, but his animation was shit.

      • Hyperion

        How long before the Banana Splits get cancelled?

  3. The Late P Brooks

    shoving each other like they were in a nightclub fire.

    Life is just one big nightclub fire, these days.

    • The Other Kevin

      And we’re all on the sticky floor being trampled. Sigh.

      • commodious spittoon

        Every day I’m above ground only lightly trampled is a good one.

      • Sean

        That’s a night out for some folks.

      • Plisade

        “If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face, on a sticky nightclub bathroom floor – forever.”

  4. Tundra

    “I don’t want a blood clot in my brain,” Asterix said, gnawing at the skin on the side of them thumb.

    You clearly have logged some time with millennials. Nice detail!

    • EvilSheldon

      I truly can’t imagine how horrible it must be, to constantly be afraid of every piece of trivial bullshit that splatters over one’s Twitter feed…

      • commodious spittoon

        It’s all fucking performative and superlative overload. They’re terrified the same way they’re ecstatic about their mocha latte cappuccino.

      • R C Dean

        And everything that is adequate is “perfect”. Its a trope I’ve noticed over the last few years(?) that drives me nuts.

      • invisible finger

        What’s the point of being a post-modern narcissist if you’re not going to be a drama queen too.

  5. leon

    “You be fine,” Seresto said. “It only affects women.”

    “I’m a woman, dammit,” Asterix said in an angry whisper, slapping them LUPA.

    You torture her, because you know she is a fan favorite.

    Great work SF

    • Sean

      she is a fan favorite.

      I’ll rate this mostly true.

      • Tundra

        Agree. Rooting for her to free the boobies and jump to the libertarians.

      • slumbrew

        ?

      • juris imprudent

        deadgenitaling truly should be in the next Miriam-Webster update

      • SugarFree

        She’s going to be the hardest one to cast for the upcoming CW show.

      • Not Adahn

        Ruby Rose. They’ve already got her number, and she needs the work.

  6. Tundra

    Sorry to OT, but Greenwald.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Hopefully true.

    • Brochettaward

      Sure, we can talk about Greenwald. He sure does like penis, doesn’t he?

    • Hyperion

      Glenn has been exiled. One of the best actual real journalist out there today.

      • leon

        Reading the hate he gets for pointing this stuff out is crazy. Plenty of mindless drones seeing “Glenn criticize CNN, Glenn must be Nazi!”

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I referenced Greenwald to a college acquaintance and the response I got was “Greenwald can’t be trusted, he went off the reservation and carries water for Trump.”

      • juris imprudent

        Love the un-ironic reference to reservation. I do hope you point that out to said acquaintance.

  7. Hyperion

    I’m not sure whether Kaylieburrow or Joanna Gambolputty is my favorite name on Glibs. Imagine if they merged and we get Kaylieburrow Gambolputty.

    Wait, needs moar hypens. Maybe there is a polyamorous triage resulting in a non-binary polygamous marriage. So we get a Kaylieburrow Seresto-Asterix-Gambolputty? Most wokest of the wokest right there.

  8. Rebel Scum

    From the extended universe.

    Republican Georgia Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene issued a direct challenge Wednesday to Democratic New York Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

    In a series of tweets detailing her plan, Greene called on Ocasio-Cortez to debate her publicly on the economic impact of the Green New Deal.

    “Since you sponsored the Green New Deal and have a degree in Economics, I’m sure you are more than qualified,” Greene tweeted.

    Greene went on to argue that the American people deserved to hear both sides of the economic impact that Green New Deal policies might have on the country. She also said that her own experience and degree in business qualified her to take the stage opposite Ocasio-Cortez.

    “You can choose one moderator and I choose a moderator,” Greene offered, saying that once they worked out the details they would be able to negotiate with a network to host the event. “Let’s do this for The People.”

    • invisible finger

      When I was your age one woman directly challenging another meant a jello-wrestling duel.

    • slumbrew

      TFW you’re rooting for a lunatic against a dolt.

      • leon

        “The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.”

        – Charlot’s Web

      • Not Adahn

        – Charlot’s Web

        That’s my favorite Lloyd Alexander book.

      • Ted S.

        A portmanteau of “Charlotte” and “harlot”, that slutty little spider.

      • SugarFree

        I think the allure rests in the debate being ripe for a domestic terrorist attack. Bait, congregate, exterminate.

      • R C Dean

        Bait, congregate, exterminate.

        I do believe I’d like that on a t-shirt.

      • slumbrew

        How many lists are you trying to get us on?

      • Not Adahn

        Whoever dies on the most lists, wins.

      • R C Dean

        TFW you’re rooting for a lunatic against a dolt.

        I’m going to need some help on which is the lunatic and which is the dolt.

      • Brochettaward

        Yes.

      • blighted_non_millenial

        You’re rooting between two lunatic dolts.

        FTFY

    • Gender Traitor

      “Since you sponsored the Green New Deal and have a degree in Economics, I’m sure you are more than qualified,” Greene tweeted.

      HAHAHAHAHAHA ::wheezes in more breath:: HAHAHAHAHA….

    • Plisade

      /Both Greene’s and AOC’s handlers scramble, both to assure their respective gravy trains that they’d win the debate, and to figure out how to keep this debacle from happening.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Glenn has been exiled. One of the best actual real journalist out there today.

    Journalists are like cops. It’s the rotten-apple 98% making the honest 2% look bad.

  10. UnCivilServant

    I was browsing pulp magazine covers for inspiration, and stumbled onto a combination which wasn’t at first obvious, but makes thematic sense: Rand and Kafka

    • Gender Traitor

      The character of Kafka’s cockroach had more depth. ::runs, hides::

      • juris imprudent

        More recognizably human you mean?

  11. mikey

    ‘“Yeah,” Kaylieburrow said glumly, her voice wandering around the ceramic spaces of the bathroom.”

    Just lovely.

  12. bacon-magic

    LUPA sounds like a singer’s stage name.

    • SugarFree

      Dua Lipa is probably who you are thinking of. In her native language, her name means “ATM molester.”

      • bacon-magic

        ^^^

      • Bobarian LMD

        ATM?

        Automatic Teller Machine or the other one?

      • Not Adahn

        Texas A&M?

      • Cowboy

        No thanks, that’s more of a Longhorns thing.

    • Ted S.

      My name is LUPA,
      I live on the second floor….

      • bacon-magic

        Earworm bad!

  13. Drake

    Another summer of rage or white boy summer?

    • B.P.

      I have learned that Tom Hanks’ son is a rapper. I have seen a portion of his video. I am not a better person as a result.

  14. grrizzly

    The important things are all decided in Beijing.

    On April 10, China began downplaying their own vaccine. This is EXTRAORDINARY as the CCP never admits fault for anything, suggesting an ulterior motive.

    Days later,
    @WHO
    , then Fauci,
    @BorisJohnson
    and
    @JustinTrudeau
    followed, downplaying vaccines and calling for more lockdowns.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    Tossed aside like a crusty old tube sock

    “It’s a f—ing nightmare.”

    That was the lament of a staffer working for one of the members of the so-called G-10, the group of 10 Republican senators who insist they’re itching to negotiate deals with the White House.

    In the span of a few months, the G-10 has gone from the center of politics in DONALD TRUMP’S Washington to the policy sidelines in President JOE BIDEN’S.

    ——-

    They are now debating internally how to approach the Biden jobs bill. Their big fear is being used as “props” or “window dressing” at the next White House meeting.

    “If you get an invitation to the White House, you go to the White House. But regardless, you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t,” said another G-10 staffer. “When you go to the White House meeting you risk being used in a feigned attempt at bipartisanship. If you don’t go then it’s, ‘Oh, Republicans won’t even meet with me.’ It all pivots on whether it’s a genuine offer from the White House or just part of their messaging strategy.”

    Another staffer for one of the group of 10 senators was resigned to a replay of the Covid bill: “You would be hard pressed to find anyone on our side of the aisle that thinks this will end up any differently than last time.”

    The staffer who lamented the nightmare of it all had a grudging respect for how effectively Biden had played things so far.

    “Everything they support is defined as either Covid relief or infrastructure, and everything they oppose is like … Jim Crow voter suppression and evil,” this G-10 aide said. “And you constantly just feel like you’re in this gaslighting chamber of insanity. But it’s working.”

    He fucked you and didn’t even toss the box of kleenex on the bed as he was leaving? Don’t worry, he’ll call. Just as soon as he needs to blow another load all over your face. Stay by the phone.

    • Drake

      Go sit over there with Bill Kristol and the other Never-Trump has-been losers. We’ll call if we want to fuck you again.

    • Brochettaward

      “Everything they support is defined as either Covid relief or infrastructure, and everything they oppose is like … Jim Crow voter suppression and evil,” this G-10 aide said. “And you constantly just feel like you’re in this gaslighting chamber of insanity. But it’s working.”

      How hard is it to frame an issue or get your messaging out when 90% of the top media outlets just obediently parrot your talking points for you?

    • leon

      “Everything they support is defined as either Covid relief or infrastructure, and everything they oppose is like … Jim Crow voter suppression and evil,” this G-10 aide said. “And you constantly just feel like you’re in this gaslighting chamber of insanity. But it’s working.”

      We were forced to work with them. They were going to call us nazi’s otherwise.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Then proper response is “call us Nazis.” If you go into knowing its a losing battle, why play their game? Unless they are putting all bets they can swing some seats in the mid-terms and just stringing this along….doubtful

    • EvilSheldon

      You have to be pretty fucking inept, to think that Biden’s handlers are playing things effectively.

      • R C Dean

        Well, everything’s relative. Biden’s handlers don’t have to outplay Washington, Jefferson, Disraeli, and Churchill. They just have to beat a bunch, weak, spineless cucks who aren’t even really opposed to them.

    • Ted S.

      If you get an invitation to the White House, you go to the White House.

      Or they could be like those “brave” athletes and refuse to go.

  16. Suthenboy

    Two stories making completely different points.

    #1. I was talking to my son earlier and the conversation turned to politics. We have different views. After a minute or two talking about two competing politicians I interrupted him and said “You realize we are debating about a retard fight, right.” That made him laugh and the conversation turned to a different topic.

    #2. Yesterday Mrs. Suthenboy and I went and had our taxes done. I hate that like poison. As I was pulling into the accountant’s office lot I noticed our inspection sticker had expired. After taxes I went to get a new one but could not find the car’s registration. Shit. So off to the DMV I went and got a new one. Then off to the inspection station I went. Then I find that I have no cash, haven’t carried the stuff in years. They only accept cash. So I go to the grocery store to buy a pack of cigarettes and get cash back. Nope, they won’t give cash back on a credit card. Crap. Mrs. Suthenboy has the bank card so I drive home to get it. She hands it to me and I think…the way today is going I bet….yep. The bank card expired two days before. Well, just shit. I have about 5 coffee cans full of change so I count out 20 bucks worth of quarters. Then I think the way today is going I will get pulled over on the way back to the inspection station for having an expired sticker. Son of a bitch, I got a mile from the house and the state police pulled me over. I explained all of this to the trooper and he kind of laughed and said “One of those days, huh? You just arent having a very good one.” He could see all of my paperwork out on the seat of the car.
    About ten seconds later an ambulance went by us at about 100 mph with lights and sirens going. We both watched it go by. I replied to him “Now that I think about it I we are both having a very good day.”
    He let me go.

    • Brochettaward

      He let me go.

      White privilege.

    • slumbrew

      About ten seconds later an ambulance went by us at about 100 mph with lights and sirens going. We both watched it go by. I replied to him “Now that I think about it I we are both having a very good day.”
      He let me go.

      That is downright wholesome, Suthen.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Could always be better and most certainly always be worse.

      My very bad day was a few years back when I was dating my now wife. Her and her dad came out to Vegas to visit and have a couple of nights of drinking. Overnight, someone plucked her license plates off her truck. Since they would be driving home across the desert, we wanted to make sure she had paperwork if she gets pulled over that they were stolen. No substations will do it, so we had to go to the headshed. We park and wait to file the paperwork, but the only parking is metered at 30 minute intervals. So we took turns putting money in the meter and on the second trip, there was a ticket for “no valid license plates”.

      Well shit. We take the ticket to the desk sergeant who is super cool and says “There is a reason meter maids are the lowest of the low, Ill get this taken care of” She gets the meter maid on the horn and the little weasel kept trying to claim he doesn’t have the authority to remove the ticket and it is what it is. That sergeant laid into that little fucker over the phone like no tomorrow. About 20 minutes later he strolls into the station all defeated and removes the ticket from his system and a big apology.

      People trying to do the right thing always get screwed but in the end, it all works out.

    • Aloysious

      Life is weird.

      More often than not, I say “I’m not leaving the damn house.”

    • hayeksplosives

      Amen to that, Surhen!

      And sorry for chuckling over your series of unfortunate events.

      🙂

      • Suthenboy

        No apology necessary. I chuckled over it also.

    • R C Dean

      Then I find that I have no cash, haven’t carried the stuff in years.

      This surprises me. I thought us cranky old coots always carried cash.

      • UnCivilServant

        He never leaves the tree farm.

        He tried to pay in board-feet of timber, but they didn’t accept that either.

      • Gustave Lytton

        And I thought the wheelbarrows of cash was awkward to trundle around.

      • Suthenboy

        Damned right I don’t. Why would I ? Trees and I get along very well.

    • UnCivilServant

      How would they ever get it passed?

      How would they ever override the machine’s veto?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Signalling has been done. Its not like we haven’t seen this before a la heathcare. “We tried!”

      • Sean

        To me, it’s still optimism that in some states, we will see good push back against these policies. I’d like it to pass at a national level, but it likely won’t.

    • Suthenboy

      I am sure it will pass easily. Uh huh.

      Remember all of their excuses for why they could not repeal obumblecare? “We need the house!” They got the house. “We need the senate!” They got the senate. “We need the presidency!” All of that time they were introducing bills to repeal obumblecare. Then they got the presidency. No more bills. Trump said send me the bill I will sign it today. Two years with house, senate and presidency, no bills to repeal obumblecare. Spineless, lying weasely fuckers, the lot of them.
      Get ready to buy a fake passport o n the black market.

      • creech

        I know more than one Republican donor who told their local congressman that everything needed to be repealed “except for pre-existing conditions.” Apparently “pre-existing conditions” were very popular with most voters (though, I doubt, they would love paying their auto insurance bill if auto insurers were forced to pay for pre-existing collision damages!). I don’t recall if saving “pre-existing conditions” was something that could only be done by not repealing Obamacare but the GOP certainly caved on the issue.

      • rhywun

        Yeah, that one is the tell that we’re not talking about “insurance”.

      • R C Dean

        Yup. Once you have “guaranteed issue” and “community rating” (I guarantee that donor would have included community rating if he knew anything about it), the rest of OCare was basically a way to try and manage the knock-on effects.

      • Swiss Servator

        Every TEAM BLUE ad around here for the last 4 years has been PREEXISTING CONDITIONZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • R C Dean

        And, of course, there has been federal law for decades saying that if you have a pre-existing condition, an insurer can’t kick you out for it, and if you change carriers without a break in coverage, the new carrier has to take you.

      • Ownbestenemy

        It was the Jim Crow of Insurance laws.

      • SP

        This drove me crazy. I know several people with serious “pre-existing conditions” who are not denied insurance coverage, but they can’t afford it at the rates being offered, or the deductibles are so huge that they effectively would not be covered except for a catastrophic event.

        Insurance being “available” does not in any way mean people have healthcare.

        I got into more than one argument about this with progressives.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Used to be that the insurer would offer a plan with an exclusion. I’m assuming they can’t do that anymore.

      • Nephilium

        A news story popped up in my feed today with a headline talking about how the poor airlines have to tell fake ‘vid passports from real ones.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Not surprising, if/when those are implemented for international travel. They’re on the hook if you’re denied entry. Usually both a fine and have to transport you back to your origin.

  17. Ownbestenemy

    I am such a radar geek. We have a three day symposium on RF propagation, wind farm effects, and all these engineering tools for analysis. I am in heaven.

    • UnCivilServant

      Why don’t I ever get invited to these things?

      • slumbrew

        On a guess, you’re not a radar professional?

      • UnCivilServant

        So what? I can’t take an interest in the technology?

      • Ownbestenemy

        There is a joint effort to create a jack-of-all trades radar that will consolidate primary radars, secondary radars (beacon), weather and in some instances, precision approach. All while operating in a 600-700 mhz band

      • UnCivilServant

        Is it promising, or a pie in the sky project?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Opps, mistaken. Its in the 1300-1350 Mhz range, because the government is ‘auctioning’ off bands of radio specturm, mainly because of the 4G and 5G use.

        It was the SENSR program, but I think it was shelved or pushed out.

        Basically we have 5 major radar systems throughout various bands: Terminal radars: 2.0-3.0 Ghz, Enroute radars: 1.2-1.3 Ghz, surface radars in the 9 Ghz range and our weather radars in the 5 Ghz range (these are the most impacted because of the the mass propagation of that band).

        You can see the effects of weather radars if you go to weatherunderground and look at “hi-def (TDWR)” radars and see a lot of anomalous propagation and strobing.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Promising as in Raytheon is going to make a ton of money? Yeah. Will they develop it and replace the immense amounts of radars we have? Don’t know.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Because of things like constant false alarm rate mapping and dynamic map filtering, wind farms present a major problem in radar systems. They become desensitized overtime and build maps to filter out the noise so to speak and will drop actual returns along that propagation path. So to counter, we build out range-azimuth gating to ignore small slices of the sky.

      • UnCivilServant

        Can you hide something in that space, or is the filtering method good enough that something among the wind farm still gets picked up?

      • Ownbestenemy

        That is what the range-azimuth gating does. It basically tells the radar processor to ignore returns in this time and space (minus height cause most radars are 2D in nature). So rather than allowing the system to develop those maps on its own, we pre-program known areas that will return bad information. I think we can narrow areas as little as 1 ACP (which is about .2 degrees) and 1 range cell (which is .1 nm I believe).

        For instance we have a permanent echo that is used to confirm alignment of the radar that under normal operations, is filtered out with these gating settings. When we need to see it, we open that window up to see it.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Man I am out of touch with my field. ACP=Azimuth Count Pulse and we typically use 4096 of them in 360 degree. So each ACP is .089 degrees. Range resolution is 1/16 of a nautical mile.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I guessing you guys don’t use synthetic aperture radars in FAA applications.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Not really because we don’t need to create a 3d picture. We are taking a valid target and providing a ‘blip’ on a 2d polar display in the simplest terms.

    • juris imprudent

      You’ll get a kick out of this story. At Burning Man there is a side-scanning radar used to look for vehicles/persons approaching the closure area, and a team that gets dispatched to intercept any bogies. I did some time on that team, and once I was out at a particular point and was advised to look for incoming. No sign. A little while later, another alert radio’ed out to me. Again, nothing. Third time I notice a plane on final for the Black Rock airport (dirt strip with temporary FAA designation) – the radar was picking them up intermittently. I radio’ed back in that if the radar operator wanted to direct air traffic he better be FAA-qualified.

  18. Aloysious

    This was the wrong time to eat brunch.

    But since we’re on the subject, I figure anybody in the head when Kamala is evacuating her bowels would suffer the same effects as being exposed to a devils mixture of mustard and phosgene gasses.

    • slumbrew

      She wasn’t just moving her bowels…

      • Aloysious

        Now I’m picturing Cthulhu birthing a new generation. The tentacley horrors writhe their way out of the slime coated and pustule covered birth canal, past the vagina dentata…

        Thanks a lot, slumbrew. There went brunch.

      • slumbrew

        Hey man, I’m just staying true to the source material:

        “Does that mean, you know, or pooping?” Kaylieburrow asked, almost mouthing the words, miming clicking a mouse.

        “Both!” Seresto wrote on her phone and thrust it at Asterix.

        Asterix opened them mouth, stuck a finger in, and mimed vomiting.

      • Aloysious

        Are you sure that’s a finger and not a she-nis?

    • Gender Traitor

      Just figured out we owe the feds, which is OK, but it’s more than we’d like. (Duh!) Tom T says it seems more of his SS is taxable for ’20 than it was for ’19. Anyone know what’s up with that?

      • SP

        Hey, want to have lunch next Wednesday?

        I’ll be in your neck of the woods.

      • Gender Traitor

        Srsly? You’ll be in the Dayton area? That would be great! ?

      • Gender Traitor

        I presume you have my e-mail, so drop me an e!

      • SP

        Woohoo!

        I would have tried for dinner Tuesday night, but it’s unclear when I’ll arrive (driving).

      • Gender Traitor

        You can help me celebrate Administrative Professionals Day! Goodness knows my boss won’t remember. ?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Sounds like your boss needs a better assistant who can remind him/her of these important events coming up… maybe take care of the card and token present too…

        😉

      • Gender Traitor

        Well, I DO have a corporate credit card now…

      • SP

        Excellent, so lunch is on the boss!

        Also, I did not in any way mean to be exclusionary. Any other Glibs in the area are also welcome!

        I posted in the Forum, if you’d rather weigh in there.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Ugh..we have to do that.

    • DEG

      I owe the Feds and NH. No extension in NH, so I mailed off my check already. Since the Feds extended to May 17th for individuals, I’m going to sit on my Federal return and the money for a little while longer.

    • R C Dean

      Don’t owe anything more than you’ve already paid, or actually have zero tax liability for 2020?

      • juris imprudent

        Got money back from Feds, owed the Commonwealth $14. Sadly what I got back from the Feds went to my local.

    • hayeksplosives

      What the..? But…?

      A few years ago when that young African American woman was shot in DC in her car, that was Capitol police too, wasn’t it?

      As I recall, facts never really came out clearly, much like the Vegas shooting.

    • Chipwooder

      Still never named him, either

      • Ownbestenemy

        His name was Mr. Kingsmen

      • rhywun

        His name was Robert Paulsen.

      • Ownbestenemy

        He is so fun to watch, still cranking out the Animaniacs voices….

      • Ownbestenemy

        Oh you meant Fight Club… 🙂

    • rhywun

      Maybe he was reaching for his taser.

    • Rebel Scum

      And there was a massive riot to protest police brutality that resulted in millions of dollars in damage to private property nothing else happened.

  19. hayeksplosives

    Update on Mr Splosives: his cardioversion an hour ago was successful; he’s in normal rhythm now and not 130-160 bpm.

    They did have to sedate him for the electric shock application (normal procedure), so The real question is how well he will come out of the sedation.

    Praying types, my hope is that he wakes up peacefully and without confusion or delirium.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Prayers out to you and Mr Splosives.

    • Aloysious

      Best wishes and respects. Hope everything turns out well.

    • Tundra

      Sweet. Still prayin’.

      Go get ’em, Mr!

    • Hank

      Prayers…activated!

    • DEG

      That’s good news on his heart. I hope he pulls through.

    • EvilSheldon

      Excellent news.

    • Mojeaux

      Yay!

    • Creosote Achilles

      Glad it went well!

    • Suthenboy

      I am very glad to hear that Splosives. I am keeping my fingers crossed. I am sorry that y’all are having to go through that.

      I can tell you this: When I developed severe RA I was nearly an invalid for more than a year. I was told I only had a few years and most of it would be spent in a wheelchair. Mrs. Suthenboy stuck with me. Not many women would do that. She did everything…cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, errands etc. She never wavered.

      When Mrs. Suthenboy broke her foot…a very painful, debilitating injury….it was my turn. I did everything and stuck with her.
      Life is much less difficult when you have someone you can count on to have your back.

      You are a good egg Splosives.

      BTW, it is 20 years since I was told I only had 7 and I am still hiking in the woods and cutting my own grass. Mrs. Suthenboy and I have been married for nearly 25? years and I have kept my word to her and she hers. If, in the unlikely event that I live another 25 I will still be keeping it.

    • SP

      Glad to hear it!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Good to hear. I hope it continues to get better.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      Best wishes!

  20. Ownbestenemy

    John Cleese can be all over the map, but when he defends comedy, it gets right to it.

    “Not wishing to be left behind by Hank Azaria, I would like to apologise on behalf on Monty Python for all the many sketches we did making fun of white English people

    We’re sorry for any distress we may have caused”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      LOL. Azaria is a putz for apologizing.

      Cleese has stones.

      • Suthenboy

        This.

        Grow some stones and never apologize to those shitbird commies.

      • Not Adahn

        He also has enough money to live out his few remaining years in comfort. And he knows it.

    • Suthenboy

      I was hoping Azaria would make his apology using his ‘Apu’ voice.

    • rhywun

      LOL

    • juris imprudent

      Wait a minute, is he leaving out the Irish? Son OF A BITCH.

  21. Rufus the Monocled

    This is hilarious.