Friday Morning Links

by | Apr 23, 2021 | Daily Links | 513 comments

Not photographed: the Dodgers fan who will attack the rabbit after the game

At least they’re not reporting on social justice bullshit. Never underestimate the stupidity of European soccer fans. And a bunch of other sports shit happened yesterday, namely Leicester winning to solidify their position in third place. And that fourth place race is a hot one that’s shaping up to be between 4 teams for one spot. And that’s sports.

Big birthdays today are William Shakespeare, who may or may not have written a bunch of great plays and poems. He shares it with presidential failure James Buchanan, Lincoln master debater Stephen Douglas, HOF pitcher Warren Spahn, child actress Shirley Temple, rocker Roy Orbison, actor Lee Majors, hockey great Tony Esposito, grifting asshole Michael Moore, terrorist asshole Timothy McVeigh, pitcher Rheal Cormier, and wrestler/actor John Cena.

Awesome show

Not a great list there. A couple of high points, but more lows.  Anyway, on to…the links!

Papiere, bitte. Well, they’re nothing if not consistent.

I assume nobody faced any consequences for this. Well, except the poor taxpayers, who will foot the bill as usual.

Adios, earf!

SpaceX sends people to…guess where! Yeah, to Space. It’s in their freaking name. What, did you expect them to send them to the ocean floor or something?

I wonder what they’re protesting this time. Hell, I wonder if any of the protesters even know. Also, vandalism and destruction of property isn’t protesting, so media need to stop calling it that.

Man, I bet this (completely separate) protest was just faaaaaaabulous! Yeah, I know that’s stereotyping broadway’s overrepresentation by the gay community. Some stereotypes exist for a reason. Also, that dude sounds like a bit of a psycho. Although some of that shit is hilariously tame. This is most definitely a first-world problems protest.

Oh my God…GO BACK TO WORK, YOU IMBECILES!

The outrage factory is gonna have a dilemma here. Do they condemn the police for shooting a black man? Do they condemn the black man for callously murdering a seven year old? Or (and this is what I’m banking on happening) do they just sit this one out completely since they don’t want to address black on black violence?

She seems nice. I question the charges constitutionality, though. A lot of this looks to me like it belongs in civil court, not federal criminal court.

Transparency? We don’t need transparency. What a shocker.

Shock G of Digital Underground died yesterday, but I won’t play the Humpty Dance. Instead, you get this absolute gem of a song. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Now have a great day and an even better weekend, friends!

About The Author

sloopyinca

sloopyinca

513 Comments

  1. Nephilium

    There is no black on black violence. It’s just a tribal culture that you see as violence due to your white privilege and racism. Knife attacks are just part of that culture.

    • AlexinCT

      RACIALISM!

    • juris imprudent

      Exactly – only white supremacists see that as violence because it oppresses the natural expression of affinity between black people.

    • Trigger Hippie

      Knife fights are just black kids being black kids.

      This shit is so racist, it’s breathtaking.

  2. TARDis

    Jesus saves! But Esposito scores on the rebound!

    • blackjack

      If they were serious about the war on drugs, they’d change the name of heroin to jesus. Everybody knows you’re not supposed to take the name of the lord in veins.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        >:-|

      • Rat on a train

        You inject directly into your heart.

      • SDF-7

        It is the tormenting of Swiss^W^W^W joy of our pun threads that balances out the ranty rage around here. 😉

      • UnCivilServant

        I have this theory that Switzy actually likes our puns and has been encouraging us with feigned disapproval.

      • SDF-7

        I’ve been assuming that as well — not wanting to actually drive the CatButter In Chief up a wall and all. All in good fun.

      • Swiss Servator

        No. The pun is the lowest form of humor – and bad ones grate.

      • SDF-7

        Hmmm… I always thought they had a peel.

        Or at least they could blend into the comments…. but I suppose if you’re going to grill us on it….

  3. Rebel Scum

    The latest data puts Germany’s new infection rate at 164 per 100,000 residents.

    DOOM.

    (Never mind that “cases” are considered “infections”…)

    • AlexinCT

      These assholes swapped supposed scientific principle and method with collectivist shamanism. Fuck them all.

      • rhywun

        The virus stalks at night. That’s just science, dude.

      • Rebel Scum

        I’ve been ignoring that asshole and all the Blanche Covidians the whole time anyway. I do not participate in virus theater*.

        *Unless absolutely necessary, of course. Had to see the eye doc recently. I wore a mask that was mesh and basically see-through. No one there said anything about it.

      • Tonio

        Branch, not Blanche, bro. Too “Streetcar Named Desire,” the other way. Yes, it’s true what they say about my people.

      • l0b0t

        Don’t get me started on the confuze I had growing up with Maison Blanche being the big, ancestral estate of Stefano DiMera in Days Of Our Lives (one of several stories upon which my grandmother got me hooked), but finding out it was just a New Orleans department store

      • Bobarian LMD
      • Pope Jimbo

        King Walz has allowed student athletes participating in track events outside to ditch their masks.

        Masks will still need to be worn when participants are not “actively practicing or playing and cannot maintain social distancing.”

        The announcement comes as state health officials are urging regular testing in schools during increased community spread of COVID-19. Student-athletes and those involved in youth sports are advised to test every week, with those not in sports recommended to test every two weeks.

        Someone out there is making pretty good coin on testing. Testing once a week for people that have 0 risk from the Rona?

  4. Not Adahn

    Yeah, I know that’s stereotyping broadway and the gay community. Some stereotypes exist for a reason.

    Was theater kid. Can confirm.

    • Swiss Servator

      Well, you are impeccably dressed.

      • Translucent Chum

        Hey, since you’re around! My son is playing soccer at college next year and his assigned roommate on the team is from…Switzerland.

      • Translucent Chum

        And my advise to him was to tell every single girl he meets he’s from Switzerland, and when dealing with idiots pretend his English sucks.

      • Swiss Servator

        Where in the CH, if you know?

      • Translucent Chum

        Winkel.

      • Swiss Servator

        Ah, northern ‘burbs, right by the airport.

      • C. Anacreon

        The town that came in second place for the naming of the rotary engine.

  5. Sean

    I question the charges constitutionality, though. A lot of this looks to me like it belongs in civil court, not federal criminal court.

    Disagree. She belongs in a Federal prison, if true.

    • sloopyinca

      She probably does, but not for what she did online, which is what she’s been charged with. Her defamatory statements and physical harassment IRL should be at issue, not trolling/defaming people on Instagram. This is a slippery slope we don’t need to go down. Most of this belongs in civil court.

      • Ted S.

        +1 Lori Drew.

      • juris imprudent

        Agree on the IRL aspect – the online should be a fucking object lesson for all young people so that socially we can begin to move away from social media dependence.

  6. SDF-7

    I assume they’re protesting capitalism and Western Civilization — that seems to be the underlying push for the last few years. Le sigh.

    Morning, all. Hope the road trip is going well, Mojo — I think I could really use taking one, the open road has been calling to me….

    • sloopyinca

      I drove to Corpus and back the last two days. The road was the most pleasant part of the trip. Well, that and arriving in my driveway to the loving arms of Banjos and the girls anyway. But mostly the drive. Nothing in the world better than passing a minor accident on a fairly rural highway and noting that there’s 8 state troopers on scene, which opens up the opportunity to go 100 mph or more for the next 20-30 miles. I experienced that three times on the trip!

      • Cowboy

        Not sure which way you were driving, but I really enjoy driving down 35. When my folks lived in Rockport it was always a pleasant drive getting there. Also didn’t hurt that good company, good fishing and the Boiling Pot (great boiled seafood, worth the stop next time you’re around) at the destination.

  7. ignoreLander

    Also, vandalism and destruction of property isn’t protesting, so media need to stop calling it that.

    Will never, EVER.EVER. happen. Normal folk lost the war on language long long ago and that ship has sailed.

    • Tonio

      Fuck off, Tulpa.

      Also, your use of the term “normal” is triggering. Please report for re-education.

      • Trigger Hippie

        ignoreLander has been around for a good long while now, I believe.

      • UnCivilServant

        Can’t remember, I’ve been ignoring Lander.

      • Bobarian LMD

        All of these things are stuff I’d expect a Tulpa to say.

      • Tonio

        Dammit. Thanks.

      • Swiss Servator

        We have all been around a long time. And we are all Tulpa.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Gooble gobble, gooble gobble…

      • ignoreLander

        *Stands up*

        I AM Tulpa….

      • Trigger Hippie

        You should have left all the other Tulpae behind and crossed the Italian Alps alone.

    • juris imprudent

      Language can only be abused so far. The torture these idiots are inflicting on it will come back on them.

      • Nephilium

        I think some old dead white guy wrote something about abuse of language in some book about an underage girl a while back.

  8. The Late P Brooks

    Fucking farmers- what have they ever done for us?

    President Joe Biden needs the help of the powerful farm industry to reach his sky-high climate goals. But his plans for cutting agricultural emissions might not have enough teeth to take a big bite out of global warming.

    Biden on Thursday pledged a drastic reduction in U.S. greenhouse gas emissions by 2030. But the White House hasn’t set any specific targets yet for agriculture, which accounts for 10 percent of all U.S. emissions, according to

    “To be realistic, the administration has to look at cutting some of the existing emissions,” said Rep. Chellie Pingree (D-Maine), who sits on the House Agriculture Committee. “We are going to have to talk about cutting emissions from farms and changing some of the practices.”
    The administration has steered clear of discussing stricter environmental regulations that could scare off the largely conservative farm sector, as well as the rural lawmakers that Biden will need to advance many of his environmental goals. Farmers have been slow to wake up to the reality of climate change, though increasingly extreme weather of late has hammered farm country and forced a reckoning.

    Those inbred hicks don’t even believe in gender justice. Take their land and give it to the truly deserving.

    • sloopyinca

      Why is somebody from Maine on the Ag Committee? Sticking a straw in a maple tree ain’t farming. And neither is tossing a lobster pot in the ocean.

      • AlexinCT

        The dairy industry….

      • sloopyinca

        I bet they don’t have half as many heads of dairy cattle in Maine as they have in New Mexico.

      • WTF

        Fun fact: There are more horses per square mile in New Jersey than in any other state.

      • Sean

        More assholes too.

        *former NJ resident*

      • Pope Jimbo

        I thought that the most horses stat was just a misunderstanding of “There are more horses’ asses in NJ than anywhere”.

      • WTF

        Can confirm.

        *Current and lifelong NJ resident*

      • Sensei

        Same WTF. Can also confirm.

      • Ted S.

        They still grow potatoes, don’t they?

      • sloopyinca

        I looked it up. They’re ninth in potatoes.
        This is the equivalent of a participation trophy committee assignment. If you ain’t top three in anything, you should lent get in a committee for it.
        Which is why the committee that investigated ethics violations should have several Illinois reps as permanent members.

      • Swiss Servator

        “The Dan Rostenkowski Chair in Malfeasance”

      • Not Adahn

        I’ll bet they rank a lot higher in potatoes per capita. After all there are fewer people in Maine than there are in Canada.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON
      • Not Adahn
      • robc

        I am okay with that. It fits with my plan to move Federal Departments to the least fitting local in the nation.

        HUD goes to Wyoming or something. Ag goes to NYC. Education goes to MS. You get the idea.

    • WTF

      Shouldn’t somebody first have to prove that recent warming since the Little Ice Age is anthropogenic and not part of a natural cycle? And then prove that the rise in CO2 is aberrant, manmade, and the driver of the temperature rise? And following that prove that the US reducing emissions by 50% while China, India, etc. run wild will actually have any significant effect?
      Oh yeah, we’re talking about “SCIENCE”, not actual science.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Given that we have hardly any actual historical weather data (and what we do have gets “tweaked”) you would think people would be wary of making predictions based on it.

        If we started measuring temps when the normal cycle was at the bottom of the trough, it would seem crazy to decide that was normal and we need to waste tons of money and energy to keep temps there all the time instead of letting it rise back to its more normal temps.

        It also needs to be said that many more people die of the cold each year than of heat.

      • Bobarian LMD

        “WEATHER IS NOT CLIMATE!” they screamed…

      • juris imprudent

        Models, with PROXIES instead of relevant temperature records (which simply don’t exist). What do you mean you think our politics infect our SCIENCE!?

      • Ozymandias

        IT’S ALL BULLSHIT. AS USUAL, THEY’VE GOT IT BACKWARDS.
        CO2 does not drive temperature. The whole premise is horseshit. They use only “human history” when talking about “highest CO2 in HUMAN HISTORY,” which is a bullshit metric for, you know, THE EARTH. Plants thrive at 1200 ppm – ask anyone who grows in growhouses. We’re currently in the 400s. Plants will die if you get below 200 ppm. These fucking retards want to drive CO2 DOWN… Because they’re morons… who fucking love #SCIENCE.
        Look at a graph of global temperature v. CO2 for all of the Earth’s history and you’ll instantly know it’s all a charade. There is no way that CO2 drives temperature. And their models don’t include cloud albedo – you know, that built in mechanism of cooling the Earth with more moisture and cloud cover. But it totally predicts what’s going to happen!!!
        This whole thing makes me sick. And you can only pull this bullshit off with an innumerate and illiterate populace. And that’s what we are. So, YAY! MUH Public Education!!!

    • SDF-7

      Another reason I hate the Wickard decision. There should be no role for the feds to tell the rest of the country how to do business — the interstate commerce clause was so obviously just to keep states from raising trade barriers against each other. But no… we live in the world of PenalTax broccoli now, so King Asterisk can apparently plan the entire economy and just magically change whole industries in 8 years. Sure… that has always worked so well.

      Need to go find something to break the rant cycle now… maybe go for a walk once the sun is up.

    • Animal

      Take their land and give it to the truly deserving.

      Robert Mugabe would like a word.

    • Rebel Scum

      increasingly extreme weather

      Except it isn’t.

    • prolefeed

      The “extreme weather” they’re referring to is stuff like record cold 1F in Austin recently. Misleading bordering on outright lying when said in defense of policies allegedly intended to make things warmer.

    • Suthenboy

      He should take a lesson from Chavez. Chavez just took all of the food and warehoused it to rot.

      Once again I want to thank every moron that voted for the commies.

  9. SDF-7

    Re: The SpaceX Crew 2 mission — happy to see it go off without a hitch, reusing both the capsule and the Falcon 9 from previous missions.

    There’s a perennial question on our “the beatings will continue until morale improves” annual survey where we’re apparently supposed to believe that the unnamed multi-national I work for is “At the forefront of human progress” or something along those lines. I keep pointing out to management that while we *support* companies like SpaceX that actually do push human progress, they’re the ones doing it and the question is stupid. But apparently the upper ranks really want to believe they’re uniquely saving the world or something. Sorry for the mini-rant — but it is almost survey time (this year with promises of *more* Diversity and Inclusion focus! Yay!), and the contrast always comes up in my mind as SpaceX does good work like this.

    Yeah, Musk doubtlessly exploited government money re: Tesla — and I think Solar City had some interesting stuff with his brother-in-law being there before he bought them (and bailed them out), but on balance I forgive him a lot given SpaceX seems legit.

    • sloopyinca

      I don’t have a problem with companies in the supply chain of ventures like SpaceX considering themselves part of what’s going on. That’s human nature, to a certain degree.

    • Tonio

      [R]eusing both the [Crew Dragon] capsule and the Falcon 9 [booster rocket] from previous missions.

      I know we did this before with the space shuttle, the reusable crew vehicle, but it’s still huge. Musk has reduced the cost of access to space dramatically.

  10. rhywun

    On Wednesday morning, hours after getting relegated from the Bundesliga in a historically bad season with a 1-0 defeat at Arminia Bielefeld, the returning Schalke team was attacked by some of their own fans at their stadium.

    LOL good riddance. I won’t miss their constant posturing as the “blue collar team”. ?

  11. Rat on a train

    the audit’s lack of transparency and safeguards will cause “irreparable harm to the integrity of Arizona’s election systems”

    WTF

    • juris imprudent

      Well then, propose the transparency and safeguards you think necessary. Stupid shit should not be allowed to go unchallenged.

      • Rat on a train

        Don’t forget to resist transparency and safeguards in the election systems.

      • prolefeed

        They did. The “transparent safeguards” proposed was not auditing the election, since that might cause distrust in the integrity of the election system if the results show massive fraud.

        Also, racist.

    • The Wanderer

      Perhaps the Arizona Democrats are just trying to hide something, but they do give some credible reasons in their lawsuit. “Cyber Ninjas”?

    • Plisade

      War is peace.
      Opacity is transparency.

  12. Rebel Scum

    I wonder what they’re protesting this time.

    Peace?

    • AlexinCT

      Western civilization…

      They want to go back to the dark ages.

  13. Trigger Hippie

    ‘“Shackling pregnant people is a dehumanizing and pointless practice that has no place in New York City,” Anne Oredeko, supervising attorney of the racial justice unit at The Legal Aid Society, said in a news release announcing the settlement.’

    Pregnant “people”, eh? Too unwoke to say pregnant woman? Am I supposed to pretend that men can be pregnant as well?

    Is this what we’ve reduced ourselves to? God, western civilization is so fucked.

    • sloopyinca

      You’ll also note the person who said it works for the racial justice unit at The Legal Aid Society. What does race have to do with the cops shackling a preggo to a gurney?

      • Trigger Hippie

        I’ve been led to believe all police interactions are racist.

        To be honest, I’m actually a believer in systematic racism in law enforcement to one degree or the other, but this is just stupid.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        An organization that actively avoids individual accountability is going to tolerate bad behavior of every sort.

      • Nephilium

        I would tend towards systemic classism in law enforcement, with a healthy side of racism, and a soupcon of tribalism (with the tribe being the blue brothers).

        But these assholes keep making me defend the fucking cops.

      • Trigger Hippie

        ‘I would tend towards systemic classism in law enforcement’

        Agreed for the most part. Point of contention: anecdotally speaking, I’ve seen many instances of poor, young, black men treated more harshly than poor white trash by law enforcement. Both groups are targeted unfairly but black dudes get it a little worse.

      • rhywun

        She was probably hovering outside the delivery room waiting for a diverse person to arrive so she could run to the media.

    • Not Adahn

      Ummm… you really need to use “people-first language.”

      Person of pregnancy.

      Al;ernatively you can use “fetus hoster,” “climate change contributor” or “stupid hick rube that can’t figure out how to get an abortion like a civilized person.”

    • Plisade

      Fecundism.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    The Biden administration’s cautious rhetoric is a product of the tenuous partnership between environmentalists and major farm industry groups that are increasingly open to taking on climate change through voluntary efforts and incentives.

    It’s also in Biden’s political interest to stay in the good graces of the powerful ag sector. While farmers and ranchers make up a small fraction of the population, agriculture remains central to the rural economy and politics. That’s especially true in key battleground states such as Iowa, North Carolina and Wisconsin, which are home to massive livestock and dairy operations.

    Farmers made up a central piece of former President Donald Trump’s base, and he frequently bragged about repaying his supporters by flooding the industry with unprecedented taxpayer subsidies. Biden has tried to make inroads in rural communities, but his climate agenda remains a source of skepticism.

    “They really have been very careful in the language they use,” Lilliston said. “They’re definitely taking a non-confrontational, non-regulatory approach.”

    Those farmers just sit on the porch swigging lemonade and smoking corn cob pipes, waiting for the mailman to bring their welfare checks.

    There’s hardly any of them. If they won’t play ball with us politically, we’ll just grind them under our boots. Grocery stores are full of food.

  15. rhywun

    I wonder what they’re protesting this time. 

    Whatta ya got?

    So damn tiresome. It’s like there’s something in the water turning everyone stoopid.

    • Rat on a train

      That and helicopter money giving people free time to go crazy.

  16. Pope Jimbo

    Sigh. The more things change, the more they stay the same. Minneapolis activists plan to fight city in George Floyd Square.

    Shortly after the verdict, Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey recognized the role 38th and Chicago, now commonly referred to as George Floyd Square, has played this past year, calling it “a critical and important location of racial justice and healing.”

    But its future remains a source of tension between city leaders and the activists who have held the intersection in protest for nearly a year. And as National Guard troops return home and fortifications come down around Minneapolis, people at the square are organizing a different kind of defense. The city said it would reopen the streets there after the trial. Activists say it’s too soon.

    But activists who maintain the space say that plan and Chauvin’s murder and manslaughter convictions aren’t enough. They want the intersection closed through the trial of the three other former officers involved in Floyd’s killing. That’s set for August. And they want the city to invest significantly more into the historically Black neighborhood.

    • AlexinCT

      You need more of that until people that have been letting this shit go on because they are afraid to admit these fuckers are evil finally can’t take it anymore…

    • WTF

      And they want the city to invest significantly more into the historically Black neighborhood.

      And there it is, grifters gonna grift.

    • Swiss Servator

      “invest” – OK, they will buy apartment buildings and store buildings. Make those rent checks out to “The City of Minneapolis”.

      • rhywun

        Might as well cut out the middle-man and write the checks directly to Al Sharpton and friends.

    • Rebel Scum

      Chauvin’s murder and manslaughter convictions aren’t enough.

      Indeed. Multiple contradicting convictions are not enough to satisfy the mob. This is why you do not kowtow to the mob or negotiate with terrorists.

      They want the intersection closed through the trial of the three other former officers involved

      Charge them all with the same bs and you will probably get it because mob violence rules Minneapolis now.

    • Plisade

      George Floyd Square… So we’re lionizing thug losers? Why is understandably fighting police brutality coupled with pretending its victims are heroes? Floyd wasn’t killed by police because he was actively engaged in fighting police brutality.

  17. SDF-7

    Oh for God’s sake — Equity apparently means holding everyone back to Virginia Board of Education. I can’t imagine how bored out of my skull I would have been if I hadn’t had the opportunity to start Algebra in Junior High.

    Presumably brought to you by the same idiots that believe there are no objective proofs or answers in math, and that engineering should be all about the feels. Extra reason to take a road trip soon, before the bridges are designed by incompetents.

    • AlexinCT

      Fuck equity. It is the marxists again twisting language to justify the fact the only thing they can do is steal from the productive until the productive become extinct and everything falls apart.

      • rhywun

        It is the marxists again twisting language

        Yeap.

      • Bones

        Great read! I’m at a loss as to why so many people buy into this wholesale. I’ve always looked at Marxism and it’s many mutations to be childish at best, evil at worst, and ignorant in between. It’s appeal is to the lazy, ineffectual mid-wit who is full of self-loathing that manifests itself as jealousy. It truly is the worst of every human condition, yet the embracement by so many has lead to seemingly zero discussion about any would be merits, because the proponents have no real rebuttals to real world impacts.

        It’s bewildering as I watch it play out, I have lost so much faith in the American people (mostly urbaites, honestly).

      • rhywun

        I do think the general public is completely unaware that any of this is going on.

        They better get aware.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Doesn’t everyone?

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Uh, take algebra in middle school, that is.

      • SDF-7

        Most did when I was in school — but some didn’t get around to it until 9th grade. (Junior High in my mind is 7th to 9th… I know some places do 6th to 8th and all). Our track for the math capable was Alg 1, Alg 2, Geometry, Trig, Calculus — and then senior year you could do independent study (AP Calc II now, I bet) or whatnot.

        And yeah — I would definitely think they could push it a bit earlier, but later is just nuts to me. How many years of “fundamentals” do you need if you’ve gotten the basics by 4th grade (which I think most kids do)? Put a year of basic finances (balancing a checkbook to compound interest) or statistics and you’d be doing the kids a lot more favors these days.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Sounds about right.

    • Trigger Hippie

      Teacher: “Harrison Bergeron?”

      *dejected sigh*

      “Here.”

    • Rat on a train

      Agreed. Keeping everyone at the same level until the 11th grade? I took geometry as a freshman with a good portion of the varsity football team. Geometry was the graduation requirement at the time. I would have been bored if I had to wait until I was a junior to break from the pack.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        I could have stopped with geometry.

        Anyone else getting fast arithmetic how-tos in YouTube? eg, how to quickly mentally multiply 43 x 68 or whatever? I could have used that earlier, but now I’m too old.

      • Trigger Hippie

        “I was told there would be no math.”

      • Rat on a train

        “I could have stopped with geometry.”
        The standards may have been low, but you actually had to pass the course. It wasn’t Baltimore.

      • Old Man With Candy

        My son used to be able to do that when he was 5 or 6. You’d give him two numbers like that, he’d close his eyes, make a funny face, then pop out the answer. Much faster than I could do it.

        I once asked him how he did it. “Well, I close my eyes and look at the numbers in my brain. Then I pretend there’s a dollar sign in front of them.”

      • grrizzly

        I remember it was fun to do before I memorized the multiplication table.

      • The Wanderer

        My dad, who had to drop out of school after fifth grade, could do all that multiplying multidigit numbers in his head. His life would have gone very differently if he could have stayed in school.

    • Tonio

      [Edit Fairy swishes by, looks at comment, can’t find URL, returns to coffee.]

      • Rat on a train

        Can we switch to markdown?

    • Rebel Scum

      The only way to teach the concept of lowest common denominator is to make it a lived experience.

  18. Rebel Scum

    Brown said the suspect was shot several times in the arm.

    And yet the cops killed that girl in Ohio. Needs moar training. //jk

    • juris imprudent

      Jaslyn Adams sat inside a vehicle driven by her father, Jontae Adams, on Sunday when she was shot six times. Police believe Jontae Adams, who survived the shooting, was the intended target.

      That’s it. I’ve had enough of this senseless violence. I am volunteering my services to inner city yutes to teach them how to shoot straight so they kill the person they intended to kill and not the innocents around them.

      • Plisade

        And teach them that if they want to abolish the police, they just need to stop calling police, especially after they’ve finished “having fights including fights involving knives … We do not need police to address these situations by showing up to the scene & using a weapon against one of the teenagers.”

  19. Pope Jimbo

    Uffda. Boy this guy would be fun to serve with.

    Since the U.S. Capitol insurrection on Jan. 6, right-wing extremism has become an issue I’ve tried to bring to the attention of the MNARNG. On Jan. 10, I submitted a 12-page memo to my chain of command and Joint Force Headquarters detailing my battalion’s attempt to stifle soldiers’ responses to the insurrection and what I saw as the need to root out extremism in our ranks. Although my memo received some public attention from the media, including the Star Tribune, the MNARNG provided no substantive response. Instead, my company commander made comments to both his cadre and me questioning my motives and criticizing my approach rather than my arguments. Further up the chain, it was even suggested that I be counseled for my actions. Such pushback continued even after 12 soldiers activated for the presidential inauguration were removed for their ties to extremist groups.

    It is truly amazing to watch a person moaning about the lack of political indoctrination in the military to call himself an anti-fascist.

    • Tonio

      “Ties…to extremist groups.”

      So, somebody once attended an event at which someone from Oathkeepers spoke, or something?

      • Sean

        “Posts on Glibertarians.com.”

      • Rat on a train

        Might as well send it directly to the USPS.

      • Rat on a train

        I remember the briefings for “don’t ask, don’t tell”. Attendance at events by off-duty personnel cannot be used to infer membership or other actions. That included attendance at events or entering locations know to be associated with homosexuals. How times have changed.

      • juris imprudent

        Apparently he doesn’t intend to keep his own oath, is that how we should take it?

    • SDF-7

      Gee… I just wonder (oh I wonder) how that memo up the chain of command just happened to get to where the media might see it.

      And why that might make the company command question the approach.

      And frankly, I wonder even more when this twit will encounter an unfortunate training exercise accident. Brown nosing political officer wannabe.

      • R C Dean

        + 1 pillowcase with bars of soap.

      • Tejicano

        It’s actually a sock but you do you…

      • Pope Jimbo

        Don’t forget the blanket. You need one to throw over the educatee to blind him and bind his arms so you can get your licks in with the soap.

      • Tejicano

        Hence the term “blanket party”

    • Pope Jimbo

      This “stand down” was a missed opportunity, and both Sanganoo and the MNARNG should be ashamed. Instead of addressing the insurrection or the right-wing extremist groups that are a threat to national security, this brief only marginalized protesters while discouraging soldiers from speaking up or speaking out. It’s offensive that anyone in a position of military power would be more upset by a memorial site than those who invaded the U.S. Capitol and tried to overturn a democratic election. It’s worth asking: Why is it so hard for some men to distinguish between literal fascists and those members of our community who are traumatized by the police and, day after day, must face a constant questioning of not just their human worth but their grief?

      • kbolino

        “literal fascists”

        Your task: before ever calling anyone a “fascist” again, you must write a primary-sourced 5-page paper identifying the ways in which these people identify with the ideas espoused by Benito Mussolini, accounting for confounding factors like changes in political dynamics since the 1930s as well as the general acceptance of many of those same ideas in the mainstream political discourse.

      • Rebel Scum

        who invaded the U.S. Capitol and tried to overturn a democratic election

        Lying liars continue to lie.

        Why is it so hard for some men to distinguish between literal fascists and those members of our community who are traumatized by the police

        Because those “traumatized by the police” behave like the militant arm of literal fascist political parties?

      • Trigger Hippie

        “literal fascists”

        Says the person who literally doesn’t understand what the word fascism means.

      • SDF-7

        fascist == “Icky person who won’t give us everything we want”, obviously.

    • Rebel Scum

      ties to extremist groups

      Such as?

      And why must I always state that “extreme” is a relative term?

  20. ignoreLander

    Re: Shackled woman in labor.
    The woman, who filed the lawsuit anonymously, was arrested for a minor charge in 2018

    So she was arrested, even though it was a “minor charge”? Grotesque over-policing much?

    David Stockman had a pretty good article over at Contra Corner blog about militarized cops. Nothing new to us, but it’s nice to see even a clear non-libertarian coming around to the problem that is police in America.

    • WTF

      Pro tip: Just because a journalist says it was a minor charge, it doesn’t mean it was a minor charge.

      • ignoreLander

        Pro tip: Just because a journalist says it was a minor charge, it doesn’t mean it was a minor charge.

        Yeah, I hate being put in the position of having to believe either the cops or some ink-stained wretch with only a fleeting relationship with the truth. Guess that’s why I mostly stopped reading these articles long ago….

      • Not Adahn

        Yeah, I hate being put in the position of having to believe either

        Embrace the healing power of neither!

        I don’t own a single circus, nor any monkeys whatsoever.

    • l0b0t

      I tend towards both the press and the state are constantly lying but, I also think, regardless of the charges pending, there is no reason to restrain a women at 40 weeks unless her thrashing about is a danger to her or her baby. Seriously, what kind of flight risk can she possibly pose? Station a uniform or two at her door and call it a day.

      • Trigger Hippie

        ^

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Cling to your fear

    Although there’s a growing sense that normalcy is within reach after the devastating Covid-19 pandemic, experts are continuing to push for more vaccinations — particularly as new research details the long-term consequences for those who are diagnosed with the virus.

    In what the authors say is the largest study to date of the long-term impact, researchers from Washington University in St. Louis found that people who had Covid-19 seem to face a much greater risk of death and need more medical care in the six months after their diagnosis, even if they had a milder form of the disease.
    “We have to think about the burgeoning health crisis this is going to cause for years to come,” CNN Chief Medical Correspondent Dr. Sanjay Gupta told Anderson Cooper on Thursday.

    ——-

    But the Washington University study shows what many experts have said for much of the last year — you don’t want this virus, Gupta said.
    Between one and six months after getting sick, patients who had Covid-19 had a 60% higher risk of death than those patients that never had Covid-19. Patients who had Covid-19 also had a 20% greater chance of needing more medical care over the six months after their diagnosis and more medication.

    What are the odds the overwhelming majority of patients who needed additional care were over the age of 70?

    What are the odds this is just another computer model with all the Public Health Paranoiacs’ assumptions baked in?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It’s always the lies of omission in articles like these.

    • Rebel Scum

      We have to think about the burgeoning health crisis this is going to cause for years to come

      It’s called the flu and it happens every year. We seem to live with it just fine when you cuntes are not doing everything you can to fabricate a crisis.

      ix months after getting sick, patients who had Covid-19 had a 60% higher risk of death than those patients that never had Covid-19

      Lies, damned lies and statistics.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      ?

    • Tonio

      Oh, it ain’t over yet, folks. This sets him up for an appeal.

      • Swiss Servator

        You’d be surprised how little that helps. Appellate courts avert their eyes to this quite often. They don’t want to be tossing out verdicts – so they claim “later buyer’s remorse” and such.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Agreed.

        My time researching appeals courts and jury decisions told me the same thing. A jury decision is seen as almost sacrosanct, and there generally has to be some pretty serious judicial hijinks during trial to overturn them.

      • prolefeed

        The judiciary being reticent about overturning the findings of the only one of the boxes where the citizenry can hold the government directly accountable and slap down excesses without resorting to violence?

        (The boxes being the ballot box, the soapbox, the jury box, and the cartridge box.)

        It’s a good thing.

  22. Pope Jimbo

    I don’t know why those racist Chicago police are hassling that anit-childhood obesity activist. The only thing he seems guilty of is caring too much when he sees kids poisoning themselves with fast food.

  23. Rebel Scum

    The Arizona Democratic Party and the sole Democrat on the Maricopa County Board of Supervisors filed a lawsuit Thursday seeking to block the Arizona Senate’s ballot recount and audit of the county’s 2020 election.

    Unity, healing, trust in the electoral process. ///MuhDemocracy

    But I thought this was already under court order anyway.

    • WTF

      You’d think they would want an audit if everything was legit in order to show everyone it was legit.

      • juris imprudent

        It would be conclusive proof of how ridiculous the conspiracy theories were – isn’t that what you Dems want?

      • The Wanderer

        It sounds like they are OK with an audit, but want an independent, unbiased auditor rather than “Cyber Ninjas”.

      • juris imprudent

        You know, independent, like a company that does work only for the Democratic party.

      • The Wanderer

        Are those truly the only two choices: a company that has Republican biases, or a company that has Democratic biases?

  24. Festus

    As mentioned in the dead-thread, this old Luddite is trying to answer to the HR and Safety departments. Apparently it’s a bad idea to stand atop a step ladder and call your female co-worker “sugar tits”. Wish I’d known that forty years ago… Thanks, functionaries! All those sins of the past. However shall I atone?

    • Trigger Hippie

      The proper form of address towards your female co-wokers is: Boo Boo Kitty Fuck.

      • Tonio

        +1 Kevin Smith reference

      • Festus

        Yep. He’s a big, fat fuck but he injects words into the zeitgeist. “ass to mouth”, “fist fuck”.

      • Tonio

        Kevin Smith has a huge following in the Bear community, and he knows it. He even did an interview for “Bear” magazine back in the days when print media was still a thing.

      • Festus

        I’m dying laughing that you subscribed to “BEAR” magazine… Did it arrive in a plain brown wrapper?

      • Tonio

        I never subscribed. And, surprisingly, that magazine didn’t feature nudity; it was actually a lifestyle magazine. Illos were about at the level of the SI swimsuit issue.

      • l0b0t

        Needs more International Male catalog.

      • rhywun

        The mid-nineties just flashed before my eyes.

      • rhywun

        Ugh that was for lobot

      • Trigger Hippie

        “37. My girlfriend has sucked 37 dicks.”

        “In a row?”

      • blighted_non_millenial

        Heart attack at what 47/48?

      • Festus

        I used to work with beefaloes that wore shorts year-round. In Canada. “Bear” is outdated. I call them “Walruses”…

      • Trigger Hippie

        goo goo g’joob!

      • Festus

        The guys’ calves were larger than my thighs.

      • Tonio

        Yeah, obesity is a problem in the Bear community. I don’t mind a bit of a dad bod, but so many guys are way beyond that.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      But that’s how Mummy met Daddy!

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Just follow this handy guide.

      • Tonio

        OMG, 1:10 for the win.

        For the record: Never, ever have I checked out the butt of a maintenance person or wiring contractor up on a ladder.

      • Festus

        Which eye?

      • Rat on a train

        nice beaver

      • Trigger Hippie

        Thanks, I just had it stuffed.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      How long will it be before they transition the Covid justifications for lockdowns over to climate change I wonder?

      • Swiss Servator

        Those trial balloons have been floated, repeatedly. People are not really interested. The Branch Covidians might – but the other 95% of the US just want to get back to life…hence they wailing and gnashing of teeth about people not “obeying”.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I was talking with a Branch Covidian the other day who was deadset we could not return to normal life until everybody in the country had been vaccinated. They had received a vaccine but were unwilling to be in a room with anyone else who hadn’t also been vaccinated. Which makes no sense to me.

      • Swiss Servator

        “So why did you get vaccinated?”

      • blighted_non_millenial

        Don’t you even “Patriotic Duty” anymore?

      • Nephilium

        As a service to my fellow man, now you must all repay my service!

      • Swiss Servator

        “I never expect to pay for a drink again!”

      • juris imprudent

        Sounds like a great excuse to never again be in the same room with him/her.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I met up with a bunch of people in the same industry this week. Nobody wore a mask. It was quite refreshing.

  25. Festus

    Sorry, Sloop. I love you and the Missus to pieces but that musical selection makes me want to go kill random aliens on the street in cold blood.

    • sloopyinca

      You’re crazy. That song is awesome.

      • Festus

        Then we agree to disagree. Too Glib. I KEEL YOU NOW!

    • blighted_non_millenial

      Before I clicked or looked thought you were talking about the Knoxville HS kid that got himself dead.

  26. Stinky Wizzleteats

    RIP Shock G or as I knew him that one hit wonder rap guy with the fucking plastic nose. As cornball as it is, Humpty Dance is a pretty good song.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      I ❤️ your avatars, S dub. Who was it here who said his preschool-aged kids love that episode?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Not surprised at the kids liking it, the Hitler walk is funny even if you don’t comprehend the joke.

  27. Rebel Scum

    Wash your hands but not your body.

    Before you next take a shower, read this…

    Shower As hygiene habits have changed through lockdown, experts are noting the environmental and physical benefits of showering less

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      As long as people don’t go back to wearing putrid perfumes to cover up the stench.

      • juris imprudent

        I’m no bear but I can smell a hippie a mile away – that distinct aroma of patchouli and BO.

    • db

      I didn’t read, but I hate the way I feel if I miss a daily shower.

      • Festus

        I think it was Mojo that quipped something like a shower makes it a new day. I’ll agree with that, even if it’s the evil one.

    • SDF-7

      Next up — environmental and physical benefits of staying on the same land for all your life.

      Mental benefits of deferring important decisions like career path, etc. to a designated Community Organizational Utility, Non-Traditional. (Heck, lets just call them Count for short, right?)

      Benefits of the all-turnip diet…

      Benefits of bringing out your dead when the plague carts roll around…

      • Drake

        Benefits of tilling the land by hand.

        Rewarding feeling you get serving your overlords…

      • juris imprudent

        Bring on the floating stone head!

    • Not Adahn

      Becasue of the shingles, I haven’t been putting anything on the affected pit. It’s amazing how assymetrically stinky I get after being in a cleanroom suit for a few ours.

      • Ted S.

        Try being in the suit for a few yours instead.

  28. Semi-Spartan Dad

    Limey, you asked on the previous thread if anyone would pull out an edc knife in self defense and thought it wasn’t a good idea. I was walking home from a party one night and 3 frat guys tried to jump me in the street. I flicked out my little edc knife and told them the first one to come at me would get their throat slit. They backed up and took off while screaming obscenities for me being a pussy with a knife.

    That could have ended very badly for everyone. But I’m under no illusion though that it wouldn’t have ended very badly for just me if I tried to take on three larger guys by myself with only my bare hands. That little edc knife saved me some broken bones at the very least. I figured it was a risk worth taking with wealthy frat guys wearing polos.

    My concealed carry pistol would be my go to now, and I don’t drink alcohol while out of the house so I’m not restricted in my options.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I never thought the Left would double down on this. Just goes to show that the narrative must be pushed at all costs. And that there is no such thing as peak derp, although we must be getting damn close.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        That race grift gravy train can’t go on forever, you gotta get in while the getting is good.

      • juris imprudent

        So you are saying that like gravity, this is going to end in a black hole?

  29. Rebel Scum

    Sure, but he’s a house negro, or so I am told.

    South Carolina Senator Tim Scott (R-SC) will deliver the Republican response to President Joe Biden’s first address to a joint session of Congress, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) and House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) announced on Thursday.

    McConnell said that Scott is one of the most “inspiring and unifying” leaders,

    “Senator Tim Scott is not just one of the strongest leaders in our Senate Republican Conference. He is one of the most inspiring and unifying leaders in our nation,” McConnell said in a statement after the announcement. “Nobody is better at communicating why far-left policies fail working Americans. Senate Republicans are looking forward to this address from our distinguished colleague.”

    I’ll be surprised if Sleepy Joe can even get through the speech. I’d hoped that, given his physical and mental state, he’d simply send a letter to congress.

    • Swiss Servator

      How will they position the teleprompter?

      • Drake

        Right in front of the camera so we can’t see his face?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        They should just beam him in Max Headroom style. He’s already got the hair for it.

      • SDF-7

        And supposedly the stutter. Hillary-Bot 2016 would have had the glitchy bits better, of course..

  30. wdalasio

    At one point, they also stopped outside the New York Times building in Times Square, shouting, “F–k the New York Times!” to the beat of a drum.

    Well, it is nice when one’s adversaries can agree with you on something.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      They think they can control the tiger that they currently have by the tail.

      • juris imprudent

        See, this is exactly why I’m worried. Because when the backlash comes, it isn’t just going to sweep up the oh-so-deserving SJWs; it’s going to hit a lot of non-conformant types. *looks around room*

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yes. True reactionaries are rarely discerning in their actions.

    • Hyperion

      We don’t have time for that, Tony, that thing is all about systemic racism and was built using racist math!

  31. The Late P Brooks

    Unity and healing at the point of a spear

    President Joe Biden is preparing to outline the next step of his economic agenda during a joint session to Congress next week and his proposal to pay for it is expected to include new taxes on the wealthiest Americans.

    Multiple sources familiar with the discussions underway tell CNN that Biden’s forthcoming American Family Plan could nearly double the capital gains tax for people who make more than $1 million a year by taxing it like wages and salaries, and raise the top marginal income tax rate from 37% to 39.6% for households making $400,000 or more in income.
    The idea of the proposed changes is to reward “work, not wealth,” a concept Biden championed on the campaign trail and which has been a driving force behind his economic policies since taking office.
    The President has pledged not to raise taxes on those earning less than $400,000 a year, which is more than 90% of taxpayers.

    Biden is also proposing to tax the value of capital gains of assets passed on at death, which currently are not taxed.

    The proposal would make good on Biden’s campaign trail promise to raise taxes on the wealthiest Americans and corporations and is his way of funding the American Family Plan, which is currently expected to clock in around $1 trillion. The sweeping plan will be centered around child care, paid family leave, education funding like free community college tuition and other domestic priorities. Details of what the White House is billing as “human infrastructure” are slated to be released Monday and Tuesday.

    We’re all infrastructure, now.

    • Hyperion

      “Biden will seek to raise taxes on richest middle class Americans”

      FIFY /truth in news

      • The Other Kevin

        Rich people have the ability to move their assets overseas and avoid taxes. The rest of us don’t.

      • Hyperion

        The easiest way to get taxes is through payroll. So as always, that’s what they’re going to do. The tax cattle always foot the bill. And they know that. So they lie.

    • Rebel Scum

      The idea of the proposed changes is to reward “work, not wealth,”

      Ah, labor theory of value, comrade.

  32. Pope Jimbo

    Geez, now even the the Brits are after teachers who don’t tow the lion on a school trip!

    A misconduct panel heard Mr Glenn, who taught computer science and had been head of sixth form since 2007, was one of the leaders of the group of 16 to 18-year-olds that went to Costa Rica on 5 July 2019.

    He was supposed to be there until 28 July, but after six days was sent home by the expedition’s leader “due to his behaviour”.

    His actions included:

    * Drinking with pupils
    * Allowing one or more pupils to drink alcohol despite being under the legal age of 18
    * Threatening to “kick the head in” of one pupil and “kill” another
    * Telling one pupil: “I’m not in trouble – you’ll be in trouble”
    * After being aggressive to one pupil, he kissed the boy’s forehead and told him “you’re all right”
    * Taking one or more pupils to a strip club
    * Acting aggressively towards the woman leading the trip when she tried to help him back to his tent
    * Exposing himself to the woman in a shared hotel room, although it was agreed this was not “malicious or sexually motivated”

    • Not Adahn

      Huh. Coed shared hotel rooms are ok?

    • Not Adahn

      Also: Costa Rican strip club?

    • wdalasio

      My bet is most of the kids are disappointed by the ban.

    • Spartacus

      At my former university, our men’s lacrosse coach got into some trouble for taking the entire team to a strip club and paying for the expedition with the university’s credit card.
      He was very popular with the players.

    • Agent Cooper

      Perhaps they should reconsider sending The McAfee School on such trips.

    • Agent Cooper

      HE TEACHES FROM THE CURRICULUM OF THE SCHOOL OF LIFE!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      There probably isn’t anything that would provide me more schadenfreude than for the leftist elites to feel the pain of the riots, arson, and looting.

      A frat brother who’s never held a job outside of DC consulting (and is also a lardass) posted an article last year about how we should allow, forgive, and forget the violence and looting as part of an evolution and change in the system.

      I responded to him with “If and when the rioters show up in your whitebread gated community, I will sending you a copy of this article.”

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Not an idiot, just the worst kind of rank propagandist.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Well, Kruglenutz is probably creaming his jeans over all of the broken windows.

    • Hyperion

      OFFS! He’s just completely off his meds now, isn’t he?

    • Pope Jimbo

      Yes, there were bad actors. There are always bad actors in any situation. But not many. The idea that our big cities were under threat is pure malevolent fantasy; BLM may have been the best-behaved protest movement in history 3/

      I think BLM is winning on a technicality. I would have given the title to the Capitol protesters who walked through building between the velvet ropes and didn’t set anything on fire. But maybe they are ineligible to win best-behaved because they are insurrectionists and not protesters?

      • Trigger Hippie

        ‘BLM may have been the best-behaved protest movement in history’

        It’s like the Civil Right movement of the 50’s and early 60’s never happened. Even Gandhi, racist prick that he was, managed to keep his movement peaceful on the by and large.

      • Not Adahn

        Fer shur. BLM’s only killed a couple dozen people. Those Tea Party facists killed hundreds.

      • Nephilium

        Hundreds of thousands! I heard from a friend, who read it on Twitter, that they knew someone who said that the Tea Party released the ‘vid to cause anti-Asian hate!

    • Trigger Hippie

      ‘”You might think that it would be hard to obsess over the deficit when it was actually Trump who blew the deficit up, to zero complaints from his party,” Krugman tweeted.’

      Krugnuts actually has a point there.

      ‘”In reality, given that GOP supporters believe that rampaging mobs burned and looted major cities — somehow without the people actually living in those cities noticing…’

      Aaaand we’re back to our regularly scheduled dishonest bullshit.

      • Agent Cooper

        “blew the deficit up”

        LIke that hasn’t been happening since Reagan, basically.

      • Trigger Hippie

        All I’m saying is the Trump administration made the Obama administration look like pikers. And I remember an awful lot of bitching and moaning about the deficit and lack of an actual budget during the Obama years at TOS.

    • Rebel Scum

      somehow without the people actually living in those cities noticing

      They failed to notice so much that they spent time and money boarding up their homes and businesses.

  33. Hyperion

    Germany’s new “emergency brake

    The controversial new law gives the national government power to impose lockdowns on states for the first time, ending the patchwork of state-by-state measures.”

    Do the democrats have a copycat law on the house floor for a vote yet?

    • juris imprudent

      Memories of what the ’68 Gun Control Act was modeled upon.

    • Agent Cooper

      You would think the Germans would have some kind of expertise on mass medical interventions or something …

  34. Rebel Scum

    Get. Back. On. The. Plantation.

    Now today we hear comparisons of Georgia law compared to Jim Crow, that black voices are being silenced, and that black voices are being kept out. How? By fear of a noose or chains? To be fired from work? To be ostracized by their communities? No. A freeID to vote. Let me say that again, a free ID to vote.

    How absolutely preposterous. Am I to believe that black Americans who have overcome the atrocities of slavery, who were victorious in the civil rights movement, and who now sit in the highest levels of government cannot figure out how to get a free ID to vote?

    That we need to be coddled by politicians because they don’t think we can figure out how to make our voices heard? Are you kidding me!? The notion that black people must be protected from a Free ID to vote is not just insane, it’s insulting. …

    You might ask why that is so and I will tell you plainly. The goal of some individuals in government is not to hear the voices of all black Americans, it is to hear the voices of those that fit their narrative, and ultimately that help keep one group in power.

    • Hyperion

      Seriously, even if they were to take the damn ID to their house and take the machine and stand there and vote for then, the dems and TMITE would still be screaming about Jim Crow.

  35. Hyperion

    “NYC to pay $750,000 to woman who was shackled during labor”

    Wouldn’t it have been better to gag her instead? Just sayin…

  36. wdalasio

    A lot of this looks to me like it belongs in civil court, not federal criminal court.

    Seems to me like it belongs with the boys’ parents and a ball bat.

    • juris imprudent

      There was a case in Oregon, oh 30 or more years ago, about a guy showering unwanted attention on a young woman. He was in his 20s, maybe early 30s and she was 14 or 15. And the parents ended up having to move the family in secret because there was nothing legally they could do to deal with the situation.

      I recall how this would have been handled so much better not so much earlier before that. Father, one or two of his brothers, maybe a cousin or a friend to lend a hand to correct the miscreant behavior – possibly even involving baseball bats.

  37. Hyperion

    “SpaceX sends people to…guess where! Yeah, to Space. It’s in their freaking name. What, did you expect them to send them to the ocean floor or something?”

    I’ll be excited when they get out of low earth orbit, for the first time in 50 years for crikey sake. They were actually expected to combat global warming, that’s what space means, duh, you ain’t woke!

  38. Rebel Scum

    It’s almost like the climate change and racism narratives are just messaging to help leftists get what they want.

    Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is now blaming “racial injustice” for the climate crisis.

    “The climate crisis is a crisis born of injustice, and it is a crisis born of the pursuit of profit at any and all human and ecological cost,” the New York Democrat said Tuesday as she again pushed the Green New Deal.

    “Which means that we must recognize in legislation that the trampling of indigenous rights is a cause of climate change, that the trampling of racial justice is a cause of climate change,” she insisted to clapping.

    “Because we are allowing people … to deny ourselves human rights and deny people the right to health care, the right to housing and education,” AOC said at the press conference in front of the Capitol.

    • Trigger Hippie

      “Because we are allowing people … to deny ourselves human rights and deny people the right to health care, the right to housing and education,”

      Entitlements are human rights.

      God, this shit is so tiresome.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Those are endowments that can be removed on a whim, not rights.

    • The Other Kevin

      Oh look, she found another camera.

  39. Rebel Scum

    Hawt.

    This is Courtney Ann Taylor, a mother in Georgia. She’s one of the many parents who’ve HAD IT with mask mandates, especially for young kids in school.

    You should just ignore the “mandate” anyway.

    • Spartacus

      I’d buy her some Four Lokos and a catsuit, IYKWIMAITYD.

  40. Pope Jimbo

    Money well spent! “Researchers” figure out how many bubbles are in beer.

    After pouring beer into a glass, streams of little bubbles appear and start to rise, forming a foamy head. As the bubbles burst, the released carbon dioxide gas imparts the beverage’s desirable tang. But just how many bubbles are in that drink? By examining various factors, researchers reporting in ACS Omega estimate between 200,000 and nearly 2 million of these tiny spheres can form in a gently poured lager.

    You can tell it is SCIENCE by how narrow their estimate is.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Somewhere between x and 10x, needs more funding for further study.

      • Rat on a train

        We need to determine if the number of bubbles as any relationship to the taste.

      • Nephilium

        They do, carbonation levels and carbonation gas will change flavor perceptions and mouthfeel. There’s a difference between Carbon Dioxide and “Nitro” (properly beer gas – waits for the jokes). Then carbonation levels are also dependent on the temperature and pouring method for the beer.

      • Rat on a train

        But has there been a properly-funded study?

      • Pope Jimbo

        Temperature is huge. If you keep a keg properly chilled you can get an extra 2 pitchers of beer out of it.

        At least that is the factoid we always used when pitching IoT projects to monitor coolers in bars.

      • Swiss Servator

        I’ll have to do some research tonight.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The various people and groups taking up Stabby’s cause is the most transparent example of performative concern and anger I’ve seen in my lifetime.

      • The Other Kevin

        It is amazing to me as well. But I do have a glimmer of hope, because it seems like there are still plenty people with functioning eyes and brains calling them out on this idiocy.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Agreed, only the lunatics are buying it and even they aren’t really buying it. It reveals them as fanatics and liars but it’s still concerning.

    • WTF

      So, another leftist idiot arguing the cop should have just let her stab the other girl to death? Do these morons even think about what they’re actually saying?

      • Ed Wuncler

        They know what they are saying but don’t care at all about the repercussions.

      • Rat on a train

        The quick-response section of the brain gives us an initial impression. Your reasoning section can later be used to evaluate your response or to reinforce it.
        Also compare SCIENCE and the scientific method.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Tiffanie Drayton is a mom and a writer. Her memoir Black American Refugee, out in November, details her escape from American systemic racism.

      Res ipsa loquitur.

      • juris imprudent

        She moved to Canada?

      • Agent Cooper

        A regular Freddy Douglass, this one.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      You see, Ma’Khia was only trying to stab that other girl because of white supremacy and the violence that it taught her.

    • Rebel Scum

      Like Ma’Khia Bryant, I was exposed to violence at a young age. I needed help, not bullets.

      “Exposed” as in “committing assault with a deadly weapon”?

      The morning after Ma’Khia’s death, I could barely get out of bed. The heavy, haunted feeling had returned.

      You are an emotionally compromised person.

  41. The Late P Brooks

    Rights? Students don’t have rights!

    Two days after Mahanoy Area High School in Pennsylvania held its cheerleading tryouts, ninth-grader Brandi Levy was still fuming about being passed over for a spot on the varsity squad.

    While a younger girl had been picked for varsity, Levy was facing another year relegated to the junior varsity cheer squad. That Saturday afternoon in May 2017 – standing not on school grounds but in the Cocoa Hut convenience store in Mahanoy City in the state’s coal country – Levy pulled out her cellphone and, along with a friend, raised her middle finger to the camera.

    Levy, age 14 at the time, posted the photo to the Snapchat social media platform, adding a caption using the same curse word four times to voice her displeasure with cheerleading, softball, school and “everything.”

    That posting prompted the school to banish her from the cheerleading squad for a year. It also led to a major U.S. Supreme Court case testing the limits of one of America’s bedrock constitutional rights. The nine justices on Wednesday are due to hear arguments on whether this disciplinary act by a public school – a government institution – violated the U.S. Constitution’s First Amendment guarantee of freedom of speech.

    For Levy, now 18 and a college student studying accounting, the punishment at the time felt instinctively wrong.

    I’m surprised she could get into college with that sort of heinous white power radicalism on her record.

  42. Rebel Scum

    Guns are bad, mmkay.

    I respect your desire to be a good neighbor. But in your quest, you seem to have skipped over the bigger question here: Should your sons be playing with toy guns at all? You may not have bought them — and your husband may find them harmless — but that doesn’t settle the matter.

    Personally, I don’t think anyone should become desensitized to the act of pointing a gun at another person (even if the gun is made of chocolate). Life and limb are precious! I also acknowledge, though, that as a young boy my brother turned practically any item he picked up — pencils, carrots, action figures — into a make-believe gun, and nothing my parents said stopped him. Play is complicated.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Put down the 409 bottle, then.

    • R C Dean

      “but that doesn’t settle the matter”

      Yes, it does.

    • juris imprudent

      Play is complicated.

      No, no it isn’t. Only neurotic idiots think it is complicated. You should probably get some professional help.

    • kbolino

      I don’t think anyone should become desensitized to the act of pointing a gun at another person

      Right, so instead lets inculcate in them an irrational fear of anything that even looks like a gun, because that’ll certainly impart the proper amounts of fear and respect for deadly weapons.

    • Rat on a train

      They are supposed to be using knives.

      • Pine_Tree

        One of our rules is “always have a knife”. Normies around us blinked a few times when the then-9-year-old showed up everywhere with a fixed-blade ESEE and a multitool on his belt, but now they’re used to it.

      • Hyperion

        Common sense knife control is the answer. Everyone uses a plastic spork from now on. Safety first!

      • Bones

        PLASTIC!!?? Why do you hate Mother Earth!!??

    • Pine_Tree

      I may be an outlier here, but I made sure mine never had toy guns, except when delinquent grandparents stepped over the line.

      My reasoning was generally similar to the statement of “…desensitized to the act…”, but I put it in terms of strict mental discipline regarding Cooper’s Rule #2. Because from a very young age, they’re shooting REAL firearms. Yes, they get the difference, even at that age. But mental discipline is the way to get those rules really ingrained.

      • juris imprudent

        That is why my son when he got to the age of interest in video games was given a choice: video games, or guns. He wouldn’t get both. He chose wisely.

    • Agent Cooper

      “I respect your desire to be a good neighbor. But in your quest, you seem to have skipped over the bigger question here: Should your sons be playing with toy guns at all?”

      Who the fuck are you? Go away.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    A decision in favor of Levy, according to the district and its supporters, could make it harder for teachers and administrators to curb bullying, racism, cheating and invasions of privacy, all frequently occurring online, outside school property or during off hours.

    President Joe Biden’s administration supports the district, arguing that off-campus student speech deserves broad protection unless it threatens the school community or targets specific individuals, groups or school functions.

    “Principals have to ensure the safety and well being of everybody on their campus,” said Ronn Nozoe, chief executive officer of the National Association of Secondary School Principals. “It can’t be the Wild West.”

    “Respeck muh authorituhz!” is the response.

    You could knock me over with a feather.

    • juris imprudent

      Just like sticking your hand down a girl’s underwear to retrieve a contraband aspirin tablet. Absolutely necessary to maintaining ORDER.

      • Festus

        Trump said that you could do that.

      • juris imprudent

        Sadly Justice Thomas was of the [dissenting] opinion that it was perfectly alright. He supported the principal’s search.

  44. robc

    Baseball birthdays (havent read what sloopy inca posted yet):

    HoFer Warren Spahn
    Andruw Jones (33.9% in this years HoF vote, IMO, he should be in)
    Dolph Camilli
    HoFer JIm Bottomley (bad HoF choice)
    Jim Scott
    Harry Coveleski
    Elam Vangilder
    Rheal Cormier

    • robc

      I went down to Cormier because I was a fan of his for some reason, he really wasn’t worth mentioning. And sloopy mentioned him too!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      1. It changes everything how?
      2. It wasn’t her.

      • Rebel Scum

        It changes nothing. And I believe it came out that is was the girl in pink that called.

    • Rat on a train

      As long as you call 911 first, you can commit any crime you want?

      • Pope Jimbo

        If you yell “Taser, taser, taser” first you can shoot any black person you want.

    • wdalasio

      F**k Nancy Grace. She’s consistently the most authoritarian moron out there.

      • juris imprudent

        The send up of her on Boston Legal was truly epic, plus she was the Shatner character’s cum-bucket.

  45. Rebel Scum

    Now entertain the scenario that a person is mid stab-attempt against another person, moron.

    Jones said, “All I want to point out is for law enforcement around the world, they don’t have guns in the first place. In our country, we have an armed citizenry. You have to have an armed police force. I understand that. But just understand, if you’re in the U.K. And somebody has a knife, you’re trained to get the knife away from them without shooting them.”

    He added, “They come at you with a stick, a bottle — our officers are trained mainly on weapons because that’s where we’re at. But just imagine a world where whatever that cop would have done if the gun didn’t work, that was his first go-to instead of his second. That’s the only thing we’re asking. We just want our kids to have the same opportunity to survive their dumbest mistakes as every other kid has. That’s all we’re asking for.”

    • LJW

      I wonder why the UK has knife confiscation programs?

    • Translucent Chum

      The stabbings will continue until morale improves!

    • wdalasio

      We just want our kids to have the same opportunity to survive their dumbest mistakes as every other kid has.

      No, asshole. Most kids’ “dumbest mistakes” don’t entail murdering another person. In fact, the overwhelming majority of mankind, white, black, yellow, brown or purple go through life perfectly fine without picking up a knife and plunging it into another human being.

      I swear to God, I read these progressives and it’s as if the only thing stopping them from murdering innocent people is cowardice.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Cowardice and an aversion to getting icky poor people blood all over their nice clothes.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      We just want our kids to have the same opportunity to survive their dumbest mistakes as every other kid has.

      Murder is just a dumb mistake kids make.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Riding around underage with an open beer in the car is a dumb mistake. Trying to gut another human being like a bass rises a bit above that.

    • Hyperion

      My opinion is that the cops don’t go there in the first place. Let them have at their stabbing. And pass out free Tide pods at all the schools. Leave the warning labels about not eating them on there. 90% of them can’t read anyway.

      You know what happens when there are no natural predators where herds of deer are at? The deer overpopulate and destroy your garden and even entire forests.

      You know what happens when we try to overprotect the children? The moron ones overpopulate and destroy civilization.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        If they punish that cop in any way, shape or form, the mass resignations are going to be epic.

      • kbolino

        mass resignations

        I’ll believe it when I see it. I thought that, despite being assholes, cops at least had spines. So far, I’ve been proven quite wrong. They talk tough on the Internet but when the cards are down they fold like the rest of us.

      • kbolino

        I am amazed at the degree to which so many are so eager to repeat the 1970s.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Remakes of Death Wish and Dirty Harry incoming. We can even de age Clint now if he’s up for it.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      if the gun didn’t work

      You shoot them again, dipshit. Eventually, it will work. Hence why he fired four rounds.

      • Not Adahn

        Tap, rack, bang

    • Rat on a train

      We just want our kids to have the same opportunity to survive their dumbest mistakes as every other kid has.

      My white privilege saved me when I was caught trespassing on government property as a kid. Well, that and not trying to stab someone when the police showed up.

    • Agent Cooper

      None of the examples provided demonstrate an unarmed third party at immediate risk.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Muh placebo! You have to consider the psychological crutch aspect, after all.

    The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention is looking into whether people should continue to wear masks outdoors to prevent the spread of COVID-19, the agency’s boss said Thursday.

    “This is a question that we’re looking at,” CDC Director Dr. Rochelle Walensky said on the “Today” show when asked whether people still need to mask up outside when they’re not close to others.

    Walensky noted that the US is still grappling with high numbers of new COVID-19 cases.

    “One of the things I think that’s really important to understand is while there’s wonderful news and we’re getting more and more people vaccinated every single day, we still had 57,000 cases of COVID yesterday, we still had 733 deaths,” she said.

    Can we please just exterminate anyone who works for a public health agency?

    • Sean

      ZARDOZ approves.

    • Spartacus

      “This is a question that we’re looking at,” CDC Director Dr. Rochelle Walensky said on the “Today” show when asked whether people still need to mask up outside when they’re not close to others.

      Trick question. People have *never* needed to mask up while outside.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        This has been known since the beginning. Even the fucking CCP acknowledges it and has lifted the outdoor mask mandates.

        Our leaders are stupid assholes.

      • Agent Cooper

        I have never worn a mask outside save at soccer games because it’s the league’s stupid rule and I don’t want my son’s team (club team, he’s 18) punished. I usually pull it down to just my mouth, though.

  47. Festus

    Alright you miscreants and ne’er-do-wells. I need to get back to my my real life wherein morals and scruples will be challenged daily. Health is fine. All the best to you!

  48. The Late P Brooks

    So, another leftist idiot arguing the cop should have just let her stab the other girl to death? Do these morons even think about what they’re actually saying?

    As I have said before, we’re dealing with people who obdurately refuse to acknowledge that there must be two sides to every ledger entry.

    Cause and effect are hard.

    • Hyperion

      All I am saying, is give stabbing a chance…

      • Pope Jimbo

        You have a point, and I back you to the hilt.

      • Translucent Chum

        Touche’.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        I bowie to your superior logic. I tang no issue.

      • Swiss Servator

        None of that!

        *narrows gaze*

      • Trigger Hippie

        Between stabbings and shootings, stabbings are the lesser of two weevils.

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        That gaze is razor thin.

      • Agent Cooper

        You really have to be en garde for these types of dull arguments.

  49. KSuellington

    Damn Shock G is dead. The Humpty Dance was great stuff, but DU had a bunch of awesome songs. This one is my favorite, such a great frigging bass line.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7P6N8r1kUTM

    • Hyperion

      Believe it or not, I never heard of Shock G until today.

      • Spartacus

        Me neither. On the other hand, I have worn a G-Shock for the past 30 years or so.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Please tell me it has the tiny calculator on it.

      • UnCivilServant

        Those buttons were impossible to press.

        /fat fingers

      • Spartacus

        No–I got mine when I did my open water scuba certification. It’s intended for diving.

    • Trigger Hippie

      That sucks.

      I was lucky enough to see DU along with Richard Humptyvision, AK1200, Dj Dara, Dj Icey, Paul Van Dyke, and Bad Boy Bill at a rave in a Chicago airplane hanger along with 7k other people around 2001 or so. I was rolling my nuts off by the time DU took the stage…that was a great show.

      • KSuellington

        Nice! Sounds like a frigging ball. I never saw them live, but I imagine peaking on E would be a damn fine way to do so. I’m not even a big hip hop fan, but DU was an outfit that had some serious influence, even if they only managed one huge hit.

      • Trigger Hippie

        It was euphoric…that may have just been the E talking…

  50. Rebel Scum

    Save us, St. Greta.

    Rep. Katie Porter (D-CA), the mother of three children, two teenage sons and a nine-year-old daughter, asked Thunberg: “I just want to ask you one question: I have a nine-year-old daughter, I have three kids, and I told my nine-year-old daughter that I was going to be speaking with you and I said, ‘What do you think about the climate change?’ And she said, ‘The Earth is on fire and we’re all going to die soon.’”

    “And I asked her how that made her feel and she said that it made her feel angry,” Porter continued. “What should I tell my daughter and how should I help her and the youngest generation bear the emotional toll of the actions that we’re taking, fossil fuel companies are taking to destroy our planet?”

    “Well, thank you for your question,” Thunberg replied. “That’s a big question. I know that there are many young people who feel angry and sad because of all the things that some people are doing to this planet and our futures and to the most affected people … today. And that’s very understandable. It would be strange if we didn’t feel that way because we wouldn’t have any empathy. But, of course, there is still much hope, and if we choose to take action, then we can do this. There’s unlimited things that we can do, and if we choose to act together, there are no limits to what we can accomplish. … The best medication against anger and anxiety is to take action yourself. So that’s what I would tell her, to take action herself because that will make her feel so much better.”

    Platitudes will solve all your problems.

    • CPRM

      9 year old daughters are of course the utmost authorities on #SCIENCE.

    • kbolino

      It would be strange if we didn’t feel that way because we wouldn’t have any empathy

      If you had empathy you would understand your opponents’ feelings. By only focusing on your own feelings and those of people you like, you haven’t shown any empathy.

    • Tejicano

      Maybe $10,000 will help to further your cause? I can arrange a discussion towards that end if you are interested.

      • Old Man With Candy

        “Towards that end”

        What you did was observed.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      There’s unlimited things that we can do

      So many ways I can interpret that, but I’m going to go with the one that involves socialist authoritarians trying to rule my life.

    • SDF-7

      And I would ask her (the 9 year old) “Who the hell is your science teacher? Look around! Does it *look* like the Earth is on fire? Other than volcanoes, where exactly is the Earth ‘on fire’?”

      • CPRM

        California! The Treez is burnin! The Ameezon! The Treez is burnin!

      • KSuellington

        Well, she is from California, where the earth indeed burned so much this past summer that we had quite literal darkness at noon on one day. Of course, that was the fault of the Sierra Club and other environmental groups winning the fight against logging back in the 80’s and vastly reducing tree and brush clearing.

    • KSuellington

      “The Earth is on fire and we’re all going to die soon.”

      These people are child abusers.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yes

        They are perfectly willing to sacrifice the mental health of their children on the pyre of virtue signaling.

        See also: Trangenderism for kids

      • juris imprudent

        Children are just accessories to the parents own lives – such is the complete narcissism of the age.

    • rhywun

      ‘The Earth is on fire and we’re all going to die soon.’

      If that is what you’re training your kid believe, you should be ashamed of yourself. What a cunte.

  51. CPRM

    Just got a call, the MRI came back clean. So it’s not MS, or brain cancer I guess. It’s not the Beetus…..Lupus?

      • CPRM

        Nothings fallen off…yet.

      • SDF-7

        Just be careful if you walk into town. Never know what will happen if a police car approaches you in a crosswalk after you try to give your white gold wedding ring to a strange beggar…

      • kinnath

        The longest journey to nowhere.

      • Aerozppln

        Drink up, Judah Ben Hur

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Do you notice that the neuropathy is associated with any particular activity?

      • CPRM

        Being awake?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        They’re probably going to try physical therapy next. Speaking from experience, it’s worth the time and effort.

      • CPRM

        Next up is a nerve conduction test, to see if they can find the extent.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Ah yeah, that’s fun if you’re into mild electrocution.

      • Swiss Servator

        “You are already dead. You are simply the most articulate zombie that has ever existed!”

    • juris imprudent

      I got to play stump the neurologist myself; not a fun game, but at least my neuropathy cleared up instead of progressing.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Your humors are out of balance just stop by the apothecary for a good bleeding.

    • Tonio

      Good news about the scan.

    • Tulip

      That’s good news, you must be relieved. I’m sorry they haven’t figured out what’s wrong yet. I hope they can find a way to give you relief from the pain.

      • CPRM

        There’s no pain, it’s the exact opposite, numbness.

      • CPRM

        But yes, it is a relief. Now it’s back to just being slightly bothersome. (actually, since now the whole of each foot is becoming equally numb it’s actually a bit more comfortable, since when it was just the toes it annoyed me at night when I couldn’t feel the blanket on the toes but could everywhere else.)

      • juris imprudent

        Numb and tingling, or just numb?

      • CPRM

        There is a slight tingling like just before a limb that’s fallen asleep comes back to full feeling, but not the ‘stabbing pins and needles’ tingling like when that limb first starts to regain feeling.

    • Gender Traitor

      Relieved that it’s not what you feared. Hope it turns out to be nothing serious and/or something easily remedied. Perhaps something involving a small Asian woman walking on your back.

    • Sean

      Sounds like good news.

    • Hyperion

      Yeah, back in the good old days, the Ninjas would have just kicked that vid butt.

    • Urthona

      i thought they didn’t have covid,

    • Agent Cooper

      Weren’t they the example of par excellence for handling the ‘Vid.?

  52. Tejicano

    Apropos of nothing other than the rambling thoughts in my head I figured I would report that the Japan Glib contingent – at least all of those we have identified at this point – had dinner and drinks this evening and conducted spirited discussions on subjects germane to this forum.

    That is all.

    • Hyperion

      Y’all don’t have any hate speech laws over there?

      • Tejicano

        Those are for wypipo which aren’t exactly think on the ground over here.

        Besides, the woke brigade don’t do 日本語 all that well so the point’s kinda moot.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Glad to hear y’all got your drinking in before Manbo #5 (this time we will strongly strongly request).

    • Sensei

      Awesome!

      In regards to your comments last night (my time) – Almost all the manga I read is “slice of life” or straight up shoujo usually for story and conversational language.

      Funny enough mentioned only in the merest of passing to my Japanese friends as they, like you, have little interest. Plenty of other stuff to talk about.

      OTH – as for anime I watch anything with an interesting story same as I will in English.

  53. Hyperion

    “I wonder what they’re protesting this time. Hell, I wonder if any of the protesters even know.”

    No.

    • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

      What do you got?

  54. The Late P Brooks

    Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is now blaming “racial injustice” for the climate crisis.

    “The climate crisis is a crisis born of injustice, and it is a crisis born of the pursuit of profit at any and all human and ecological cost,” the New York Democrat said Tuesday as she again pushed the Green New Deal.

    Racial Injustice is like WD-40. There’s nothing it can’t do. Same as Kkkapitalism.

    • Hyperion

      Well, it is known that wiminz and minorities are hardest hit by [fill in the blank]. Even if they all live in the same building, somehow this is true.

    • Tejicano

      She just figured she would beat Babylon Bee to the punch on this one.

    • Urthona

      The other thing yesterday is that they said the mass illegal migration to the US is caused (despite evidence) by climate change.

      So, when you think about it… our own racism is causing illegal immigrants to move here. Makes perfect sense.

      • Hyperion

        “The other thing yesterday is that they said the mass illegal migration to the US is caused (despite evidence) by climate change.”

        SCIENCE!

  55. The Late P Brooks

    Our leaders are stupid assholes.,/em>

    You misspelled “evil and vindictive”.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Why not both?

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      You misspelled “evil and vindictive”.

      ^ this. I know many think the pols are gibbering idiots, but I think they know exactly what they are doing and are doing it quite well. They knew the Russian election hoax with Trump was 100% fabricated from their intelligence briefings, yet the Dems still beat that drum and not a single GOP Rep came forward to reveal they all knew it was fake. None of them believe that masks prevent Covid or the Covid magically stops becoming infectious when sitting as opposed to standing or during certain hours of the day.

      They do believe in consolidating power under their control. That’s what it’s all about and Covid has provided a very nice opportunity to do this. We’re now at the point where the power of the state to restrict private gatherings/speech, court packing, and additional states are under serious contemplation. It seems like the Dem and eGOP pols have been very successful.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I think the larger problem is that our fellow American citizens are buying into the propaganda and enabling the power grab. And that’s a much larger and more disturbing problem to face.

      • juris imprudent

        Most people ignore politics. They ignore the bullshit at the edges, then are surprised when one day it surrounds them. The problem is the people that are obsessed with politics, but I honestly don’t know how we just kill them off.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The cultural resistance to introducing politics into personal lives has been gutted by the education system and the media.

        The people that you used to find merely annoying are now actively threatening.

  56. The Late P Brooks

    Remakes of Death Wish and Dirty Harry incoming.

    Except this time the hero will be a fat tattooed trans woman with pink hair wreaking the Lord’s vengeance on white supremacists who don’t pay enough taxes.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      They already did a Death Wish with John McLane.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Bruce is OK but he’s a pale imitation of Charles Bronson. Maybe we can get Mel Gibson liquored up and he can chew the scenery.

      • CPRM

        The Passion II: Jesus’ Revenge

      • kinnath

        Santa is going to kick your ass.

      • CPRM

        Beaver puppet included?

      • Agent Cooper

        I liked that movie. I also have mad respect for Jodie Foster for knowing a person isn’t just the worst thing they’ve ever done.

      • SDF-7

        You and I remember “Jesus vs. Santa” very differently…

      • Nephilium

        You haven’t heard of Fatman?

      • Rat on a train

        Santa also needed Jesus to rescue him from the Iraqis.

      • l0b0t

        Act Of Vengeance is my favorite Bronson film. One might think a made for TV flick about the United Mine Workers 1969 election would be a snoozer. One would be wrong, with Mr. Bronson starring alongside Hoyt Axton, Wilfred Brimley, both Ellens (Burstyn and Barkin), and (ST:TNG’s Lt.Cmdr Remmick) Robert Schenkkan it is fantastic..

      • Aerozppln

        I actually really liked the new Death Wish. It was fun reading the critics reviews as well. Pure gold.

  57. The Late P Brooks

    I think the larger problem is that our fellow American citizens are buying into the propaganda and enabling the power grab. And that’s a much larger and more disturbing problem to face.

    This.

    The “have you got your shot yet?” religionists are fully bought into the Government-as-Salvation narrative, and they are ubiquitous.

    Self-ownership and personal agency are as terrifying to them as Satan’s Lake of Fire.

  58. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Have y’all seen the cover of Jill Biden’s children’s book about Joe?

    https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/joey-dr-jill-biden/1136553869

    A hilarious Norman Rockwell ripoff if I’ve ever seen one, complete with smiling dogs that I can only assume mauled someone shortly after the painting was completed.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      *barf*

      “(Jill) Biden’s anecdotal portrait of her spouse’s early years spotlights his competitiveness and risk-taking…his role as a peacemaker, devoted brother, and defender of bullied peers…and reveals how…high school, when he became a star athlete and class president, paved the way for leadership roles in college and beyond.” —Publishers Weekly

      *baaaarrrrrrf*

      • SDF-7

        Hmm… don’t see anything about switchblades banged on the curb and left in rain barrels, chain fighting or other Cornpop bad dude highlights….

        Strange since knife fights are apparently everyone else’s typical upbringing now and all…

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        +1 shotgun blast in the air

      • Hyperion

        Also, shouldn’t he have his head tilted a little forward for the hair sniffin?

    • limey

      Is that in the same category as this (but real)?

      I don’t know if yanks have enough context for that because it references something that happened outside of America and wasn’t a big war.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Blocked in my country on copyright grounds.

      • limey

        Sad!

    • creech

      Suddenly I’m in favor of re-opening mental institutions and confining anyone who buys this book for their children.

  59. The Late P Brooks

    “I just want to ask you one question: I have a nine-year-old daughter, I have three kids, and I told my nine-year-old daughter that I was going to be speaking with you and I said, ‘What do you think about the climate change?’ And she said, ‘The Earth is on fire and we’re all going to die soon.’”

    America’s intellectual feedstock.

    Well done, teechurz. Well done.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      She’s right, in the grand scheme of things we’re all going to die soon. I’m no happier about it than you are but best get used to it kid.

  60. grrizzly

    You might think you’ve read this before. Still today’s news.
    Australia’s Perth to enter snap lockdown after second COVID-19 case

    Western Australia’s capital of Perth and the neighbouring Peel region will enter a snap three-day lockdown from midnight on Friday after two people tested positive for COVID-19, the first cases of community transmission in Australia in a week.

    The first case related to a man in Melbourne who likely contracted the disease during his two-week quarantine stay in a Perth hotel.

    The second was his close contact in Perth, Western Australia Premier Mark McGowan said in a televised news conference, where he announced the lockdown.

    “I know this is hard to take and I wish we didn’t need to do this. But we can’t take any chances with the virus,” McGowan said.

    The lockdown will close down most public spaces including pubs, restaurants, places of worship, libraries, and cinemas. Several sporting events scheduled for Friday night will go ahead, however, with masks mandatory.

    • limey

      Two people? Tested positive? Shut down the entire city!

    • Rebel Scum

      But we can’t take any chances with the virus,” McGowan said.

      Indeed. We wouldn’t want to risk contracting a disease that has a 99.97 percent recovery rate.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      My question is what they are going to do once everyone is fully vaccinated (conferring a narrow immunity) and a variant arises that the vaccine is useless for?

      They could be locked down for years on end.

      • limey

        Well, yeah, of course?

    • rhywun

      Madness.

      That country has lost its fucking mind.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Well, they’ve completely fucked up. The population has no acquired immunity to the disease, so they’re going to be fighting it off forever because the political leadership can’t tolerate reality.

        I don’t see how they can ever open the borders using their current rationale. The risk is always going to be there.

    • Agent Cooper

      Once a prison colony, always a prison colony.

  61. Rebel Scum

    *Checks popcorn stores*

    Olympic decathlete and reality TV star Caitlyn Jenner vowed to “put an end to Gavin Newsom’s disastrous time as governor” in a statement released Friday morning after filing paperwork to run against him in a likely California recall.

    Jenner said:

    “California has been my home for nearly 50 years. I came here because I knew that anyone, regardless of their background or station in life, could turn their dreams into reality. But for the past decade, we have seen the glimmer of the Golden State reduced by one-party rule that places politics over progress and special interests over people. Sacramento needs an honest leader with a clear vision.

    “I have been a compassionate disruptor throughout my life, from representing the United States and winning a gold medal at the Olympics to helping advance the movement for equality. As Californians, we face a now-or-never opportunity to fundamentally fix our state before it’s too late. Taking on entrenched Sacramento politicians and the special interests that fund them requires a fighter who isn’t afraid to do what is right. I am a proven winner and the only outsider who can put an end to Gavin Newsom’s disastrous time as governor.

    • limey

      But for the past decade, we have seen the glimmer of the Golden State reduced by one-party rule that places politics over progress and special interests over people.

      Well, at least it’s acknowledged.

  62. The Late P Brooks

    “We’d like to leave Afghanistan, but we can’t abandon them. Just a few more decades, and they’ll be in better shape to govern themselves.”

    • limey

      Whatever happened to the corrupt man in the fur hat? Didn’t they like him?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Blue turbans will be the headgear of choice of Afghan government officials soon enough. At least the Taliban is opposed to bacha baz.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Or is it black turbans? Whatever…

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        Buffalo Guy? He attacked the Capitol.

    • Hyperion

      “they’ll be in better shape to govern themselves”

      Which will look a lot like tribal warfare.

      • Tejicano

        El-Oh-Fucking-El

        Bravo!

    • juris imprudent

      “I can’t quit you”

  63. Rebel Scum

    Federalize everything. That is what America is about.

    “I think that the possibility of change is absolutely there at this moment,” Sharpton advised. “I’ve talked to Congresswoman Bass. I’ve talked to Senator Cory Booker. There are conversations going with Tim Scott. … As you saw a conviction of Chauvin, and then you see during the trial, the killing of Daunte Wright, and now we have a situation we’re looking to see what it is in Ohio and North Carolina, all in this short period of time, Breonna Taylor and Ahmaud Arbery and all of these cases happened right around the time of George Floyd. If we can’t do it now, when will we ever be able to do it? I think the time has come for the nation to deal with it. President Biden and Vice President Harris have said it needs to be dealt with. We are seeing the absolute time that policing must be defined by the federal government. And if we don’t do it, we’ll continue to see these things, and it will end up tearing this society apart in an irreparable way.”

    • rhywun

      “Do it”.

      Do what? What is your grand solution to… whatever the problem you’re claiming exists?

      • creech

        Grand solution would appear to be that cops refrain from arresting Colored folks; except, of course, for Colored folks that might be threatening Colored politicians.

    • Rat on a train

      Authoritarians prefer unitary governments.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Based on the zero accountability that the FBI has, I’m sure federalizing the police will be a vast improvement.

  64. The Late P Brooks

    “I know this is hard to take and I wish we didn’t need to do this. But we can’t take any chances with the virus,” McGowan said.

    “I know this is hard to take and I wish we didn’t need to do this.” But you deserve it.

    I’m going to pretend this is what the executioner says to McGowan as he clamps his neck in the guillotine.

  65. Rebel Scum

    Some people insist on 1) not dwelling within reality and/or 2) being lying propagandists.

    Abrams said that people are having to “have conversations about who is murdered in the streets as a 16-year-old. Regardless of what Ma’Khia Bryant may have been doing, there is no justification for taking her life without attempting some form of intervention, and we are watching this happen again and again.”

    She added that deaths at the hands of police can only change “if we change how voting happens and who gets to participate in our elections.”

    1) Someone, thankfully, did intervene…with several bullets in order to stop a violent attack.
    2) I suppose Dems are going to start pushing 16 y.o. voting age moar harder now.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Do the black adults that were participating in the run-up to the stab-a-thon bear any culpability? That damn white cop just came in and ruined it all.

    • WTF

      there is no justification for taking her life

      Other than the fact she was in the process of trying to murder someone with a knife.

  66. The Late P Brooks

    “I have been a compassionate disruptor throughout my life, from representing the United States and winning a gold medal at the Olympics to helping advance the movement for equality. As Californians, we face a now-or-never opportunity to fundamentally fix our state before it’s too late. Taking on entrenched Sacramento politicians and the special interests that fund them requires a fighter who isn’t afraid to do what is right. I am a proven winner and the only outsider who can put an end to Gavin Newsom’s disastrous time as governor.

    All noise, no signal. S/he’s perfect for the job.

  67. grrizzly

    Belarus

    It’s been 1 year of Belarus not locking down or joining the insane hysteria, with church, football, parades, elections, protests, dance balls & life continuing as normal.

    Deaths/million are *less than a quarter* of the average of their 5 bordering countries which did lockdown

    If lockdowns had a positive effect, Belarus must necessarily have a a much higher death rate than its neighbors. That it is 3/4 lower strongly suggests lockdowns are worse than stupid voodoo ineffective at stopping covid; they’re destructive and much worse than doing nothing

    Kindly shut up with your stupid conspiracy theories of Belarus hiding bodies. As mentioned above, if student opposition leaders’ arrests were wildly publicized by western media, how would the govt get away with hiding the 20,000 bodies needed to make lockdowns look noncriminal?

    • Drake

      It’s pretty clear that mask wearing and lockdowns cause more deaths. I joked about it a while back, but now I really think it’s true.

      • kbolino

        We have an Iron Law for “foreseeable consequences are not unintended” but I don’t know that we have a rule for when our entire ruling class across the world is full of blithering idiots who can’t foresee a goddamn thing.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      *the face you make when the vaunted medical establishment of your democracy gets shown up by an authoritarian dictatorship*

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I don’t doubt that they’re underreporting the numbers to some degree but good on them anyway.

      • grrizzly

        They don’t rush to declare every death with COVID as a COVID death. But definitely no piles of dead bodies on the streets.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        So they’re not paying the hospitals for every positive COVID death statistic.

    • rhywun

      I work with a whole team of developers there. I should ask them how high the bodies are stacked.

  68. The Late P Brooks

    Do what? What is your grand solution to… whatever the problem you’re claiming exists?

    Gestapo.

  69. The Late P Brooks

    She added that deaths at the hands of police can only change “if we change how voting happens and who gets to participate in our elections.”

    What the everloving fuck does that mean?

    • rhywun

      Forget it, it’s Stacey-Abrams-world.

    • Rebel Scum

      Straight, white, christian, conservative males should be prohibited from voting, I presume.

      • kbolino

        Universal suffrage still has enough totemic power to keep them from openly questioning it, but “not all votes are equal” might be where they go next.

    • Hyperion

      Who is not permitted to participate in elections now? I think that question is a good start. We’re not going to go there, are we?

  70. Tejicano

    In reference to the Sister McStabby discussion I’m seeing here and just about everywhere else on the intertoobes – the pachyderm in the parlour which I haven’t seen mentioned…

    Back when I wuz a yoot (yeah, arguably some time ago) if I was out in the yard with my playmates engaged in some type of playful activity ; had a patrol car pulled over and shown attention to our activities we most probably would have given it some consideration. Not that we were often engaged in activities which might have been regarded by some as less than proper or possibly not quite legal, but we would have noticed and thought about what we were doing and how it might be perceived by others.

    But I can’t imagine that a cop in uniform running up to us, loudly demanding any of us to cease and desist – WITH A DRAWN HANDGUN – could have been totally ignored by any but the least socially adept individuals I have ever encountered.

    Seriously. I grew up with a number of people who would prove to be of felonious intent, a good number of whom most probably for this reason never lived to see 30, but I cannot imagine any of them not adjusting their behavior when a police cruiser came around the corner.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      This is what happens when the community and the police have zero overlap and trust is completely gone, whether because of misconduct on the police’s part or because the community culture is broken.

    • Hyperion

      “In reference to the Sister McStabby”

      You mean Buffarilla NcStabby.

  71. Nephilium

    Few things warm my black IT heart as hearing someone from the employees company shutting down a proposal by saying we’re not doing any work, nor having any more discussions until the business can describe the final end state they’re building towards.

    • Sensei

      As a business person who frequently deals with IT development – I concur. It’s on the business to define the end state.

      OTH – I love when IT develops an “80% solution” and assumes that it reduces the problem or workload by the same 80%.

    • Unreconstructed

      Oh, that is a sweet, sweet sound.