Second Shot Links of Monday

by | May 3, 2021 | Daily Links | 422 comments

99.95?

Second Pfizer shot yesterday…ugh. By evening, I was running down. Still not quite sentient today. These links will reflect that…

  • Danes go safetyist.
  • The surprising part of this news was that both still exist to be sold.
  • Who is up for sun and (restricted) fun in Europe!
  • China is asshoe. And someone is going to get their organs harvested.

Hopefully I have crawled back into bed by the time these post.

About The Author

Swiss Servator

Swiss Servator

Currently serving at the pleasure of a Swiss multinational. Previously a Soldier, rugby player, lawyer, bouncer, bartender, substitute teacher, risk manager, and cubicle mushroom. Will work for raclette.

422 Comments

  1. Chafed

    Europe has got to be craving tourists. Their tourist revenue has been close to zero for a year.

    • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

      Nobody wants to go there any more. It’s too crowded.

      • Rat on a train

        Why buy good luggage, you only use it when you travel.

    • Swiss Servator

      With their lockdown and mask extremism, how many people will shell out thousands to go?

      • Chafed

        I think there is huge pent up travel demand so plenty.

      • Bobarian LMD

        This…

        Been looking at bookings for FL and other parts south… Shit is starting to blow up.

    • Nephilium

      Saw a headline come across my newsfeed that Canada will be requiring proof of vaccination before allowing entry into the country from the US.

      • The Other Kevin

        I may or may not have already heard of someone with fake credentials.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I may or may not want to make contact with someone.

      • Tonio

        You may or may not want to download the official CDC blank form from this here woodchippery website which we are on now.

      • sssbobbyr

        Where that?

      • Tonio

        Dammit, Swiss, back to your sickbed!

      • Swiss Servator

        Including truckers, rail personnel and such? They may plunge into depression and famine at this rate.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Well, we were planning on swinging through Toronto this fall during our eastern road trip, but who knows what that’s going to look like in 5 months.

        Heck, I’m afraid we won’t be able to see my family in upstate NY given that we won’t be getting the shots.

      • UnCivilServant

        Is your family mandating them?

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Negative, but I’m fully expecting an attempt at ratcheting up the scare tactics ahead of flu season this fall. Vaccine passports may be waning right now, but I don’t think we have heard the last of the idea here in the US.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Considering talking heads on seen in the enemies intel reports (Media newscasts) and how all us un-vaccinated unwashed should be shuttered out of society, I believe you to be correct sir.

      • Not Adahn

        I think Cuomo has withdrawn that fuckery as part of his “Appease the Peasants” initiative.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Andrew “I’d accuse you of trying to kill your Grandma, if I hadn’t already killed her” Cuomo?

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        We were in the process of making going to Montreal our Thanksgiving tradition every year.

        We went in 2019 and had a fantastic time. Everyone wanted to go again next year. Even my parents wanted to go after hearing how much fun we had.

        Then Covid.

        I was holding out some hope that Canada would end the stupidity in time for this year, but it’s pretty clear that they won’t be ending it anytime soon, if ever.

      • Not Adahn

        YMMV, but Quebec City > Montreal for short visual.

      • Enough About Palin

        “Canada will be requiring proof of vaccination before allowing entry into the country from the US.”

        God damned racists!!!!!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      No jab for me. So no Europe.

      Not that I was going anyway.

      • grrizzly

        I’ve been to the Louvre half a dozen times. I can wait a decade until people come to their senses. Meanwhile, the Louvre is currently closed.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’ve been once. The museum guide was an obnoxious arrogant Parisian, but I repeat myself.

      • zwak

        The Pixies. Always a good choice.

  2. grrizzly

    The Danes should have advertised the JnJ vaccine like this:

    ALL THE SIDE EFFECTS IN HALF THE DOSES!

    Perfect for those “hard-to-vaccinate” populations!

    • The Other Kevin

      How about this one?

      • Sensei

        That is spectacular!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Having unclotted blood in your cerebral arteries is overrated anyway.

    • blackjack

      The J&J vax is rotten in Denmark!

  3. Sean

    Hope ya feel better, Swiss.

    • Swiss Servator

      Thanks…lying down for a while now.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yes, yes… give those wireless brain monitoring nanobots time to embed themselves.

  4. Shpip

    Under current restrictions, people from only seven countries, including Australia and Singapore, can enter the EU on holiday, regardless of whether they have been vaccinated but subject to tests or quarantine.

    I wonder if the typical flood of college students doing a “semester abroad” will be noticeable by its absence.

  5. Stinky Wizzleteats

    I can not go to all of the wonderful European cultural attractions and restaurants that are closed down anyway from the comfort of my own sofa. I think I’ll do that instead.

  6. Tonio

    Feel better, Swiss!

    • Chafed

      Ditto.

  7. Sensei

    “Excluding the J&J vaccine, which accounts for around a third of Denmark’s total contracted supplies of Covid-19 shots, could delay the country’s vaccination campaign by four weeks.”

    Given that elderly would likely benefit and be first in line and that it mostly impacts younger women that doesn’t seem to be making a good risk return trade-off.

    Full Disclosure – J&J recipient. Swissy – 2nd jab of Moderna made a coworker have to take a sick day.

    • The Other Kevin

      I’m waiting for J&J to be available close by. I think I’m going to cave, everyone on my hockey team and at work got their shots.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Novavax is the way to go if you can put it off. A traditional vaccine.

      • Chafed

        Has it been authorized in the US?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Not yet, last I heard was a hoped for midMay or early June (I haven’t checked lately).

      • Chafed

        Thanks. I will likely get the jab when it is available.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        To be honest though, it’s mostly traditional. They trick an insect’s cells into producing the spike protein and harvest that instead of tricking one’s own body. I don’t think it’s quite vaccine SOP but it’s close.

      • Count Potato

        So you are saying it will turn me into a half fly?

      • slumbrew

        Brundle-fly, coming right up.

      • Sensei

        Not yet. Co-worker of my wife is working on evaluating the trials.

        It’s also a 2 doses.

      • Sensei

        Really sore arm. General ache as opposed to knot of pain from a tetanus shot. One day of lethargy.

        All my coworkers are vaccinated and I will wind up taking the train into work. Made the calculation for peace at work and getting to work.

      • Bobarian LMD

        I got the J&J. Had almost zero reaction.

        Unlike shingles vaccine which was like someone hit my shoulder with a hammer.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Woke up day after Phizer shot 2 felt like some one took a running start and smacked me in the arm with a 2×4.

        2 days after I woke up with chills and full body aches. But I got out in the sun and fresh air for a couple hours and all was well.

    • Urthona

      I’m looking forward to the autoimmune disease I develop in 10 years from the Pfizer.

      • Sensei

        It should be fun when we all find out. I’m honestly hoping something useful comes out of this for viral diseases in general.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Like spidey senses?

      • Ownbestenemy

        I picture it more like this

        And she can look so hot yet so torn down in the same scene.

      • DEG

        Despite my skepticism of the Covid vaccines and my intentions to not get one of them, I am hopeful that something good comes out of the work on these vaccines for viral diseases.

        The politicization, stupidity, and fear need to die down first, so it might be a while.

  8. Chafed

    You weren’t kidding. China really is asshoe.

  9. Sensei

    And apologies for adding a new link so soon, but really the world is the best of hands for the next generation.

    Debate Erupts at N.J. Law School After White Student Quotes Racial Slur

    “A Rutgers Law student repeated an epithet from a legal case, and now Black students at the New Jersey school are calling for a policy on slurs — and apologies.”

    • Chafed

      “Although we all deplore the use of racist epithets,” said Gary L. Francione, a law professor who also signed the statement, “the idea that a faculty member or law student cannot quote a published court decision that itself quotes a racial or other otherwise objectionable word as part of the record of the case is problematic and implicates matters of academic freedom and free speech.”

      These guys get it.

      These hothouse flowers attending law school better grow up. Fast. The real world is not going to cater to their sensibilities.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        These hothouse flowers attending law school better grow up. Fast. The real world is not going to cater to their sensibilities.

        *receives 8th email on the evils of racism today*

        Color me skeptical.

      • Ownbestenemy

        The real world is not going to cater to their sensibilities —- that really should be now meant for us.

      • Gadfly

        I’m going to split the baby here and say that you are both right. Society will absolutely cater to these sensibilities, but as this catering is part of a trend that is slowly (or not so slowly) detaching society from reality it can be said in the end that the real world will not allow the catering to continue indefinitely.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The flowers are running the flower shops.

      • kinnath

        The real world is not going to cater to their sensibilities.

        I used to think that. But when HR departments in military contractors start catering to SJWs, it’s pretty much over.

      • RBS

        Yeah, the SC Bar just sent out a survey inquiring about how woke we think the bar is and how to fix the unwokeness and the City of MB is getting ready to hire a Chief Diversity officer….

      • Lackadaisical

        The real world is not going to cater to their sensibilities.

        Not so sure of that nowadays.

      • R C Dean

        the idea that a faculty member or law student cannot quote a published court decision that itself quotes a racial or other otherwise objectionable word as part of the record of the case is problematic and implicates matters of academic freedom and free speech stupid

        Dude, you’re on salary. You’re not getting paid by the word.

      • Enough About Palin

        You misspelled shithouse.

    • Tonio

      “At the height of a ‘racial reckoning,’ a responsible adult should know not to use a racial slur regardless of its use in a 1993 opinion,” states the petition, which has been signed by law school students and campus organizations across the country.

      “Reckoning.” That has a nasty sound to it. Like an implied threat of violence.

      “We vehemently condemn the use of the N-word by the student and the acquiescence of its usage,” the petition says.

      A word which is thrown around in rap like lead in a gangster film, yet the oh-so-sensitive law student can’t say it.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The only appropriate response is “Fuck off”

    • Urthona

      Every student who objected to this should be immediately expelled.

      • Tonio

        Expeller pressed?

  10. Drake

    Cancer: 2 of Wands – Riches, fortune, magnificence, physical suffering, disease, chagrin, sadness, mortification. Basically, being dissatisfied with what you’ve accomplished.

    It doesn’t seem possible but yesterday’s horoscope was spot-fucking-on. That is all.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Why so glum?

      • Drake

        Just accepted a job with an enormous raise. A few minutes later another company I had given up on tells me they are making a decision tomorrow.

        Same job titles, the second one would have allowed me to relocate to NC. I was honest and told them I had already accepted another job. Maybe they’ll come back with an even better offer anyhow, then I’ll feel bad about backing out of the first one.

      • Sensei

        Are you managing to get out of the “Garden State”?

        Godspeed!

      • Drake

        Job #1 – no. I would love to Eastern PA and commute in when necessary.

        Job #2 – yes, at my leisure (and expense).

      • Drake

        move to PA…

      • Sean

        ⬅️

      • Sensei

        Awesome.

      • Drake

        Adjusted for inflation in a year or two, it will probably be a pay cut.

      • DEG

        Being able to move to eastern PA sounds is an improvement.

        Congratulations on the new job!

      • Tonio

        NC, while beautiful, is turning prog. It’s marching through the south like Sherman. Maryland became NJ, Virginia became MD, NC is next.

      • sssbobbyr

        East of 95 is still it’s own special kind of place.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        another company I had given up on tells me they are making a decision tomorrow.

        I hate when that happens, and I try not to do that when interviewing people. It doesn’t take much to shoot off a “sorry, we made our decision” or “our process usually takes 2-3 weeks, so please be patient”

      • Enough About Palin

        If they tell you, or “our process usually takes 2-3 weeks”, you don’t want to work there.

      • UnCivilServant

        2-3 weeks? Where is this lighting fast process?

        /state worker.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        *nods knowingly*

        Actually, since we do entry level hiring out of schools, it can take that long to interview at all of the schools, and we only hire 1 person a year at most. It can be upwards of 3 weeks from initial interview to callback in that situation.

        Lateral hires are much faster.

    • Not Adahn

      *flexes*

      • Not Adahn

        Speaking of things you’re wrong about,

        My excellent watchpup demonstrates daily how wrong you are about solar time being irrelevant. Especially with crepuscular critters like deer and turkeys, and dawn coming earlier every day.

      • UnCivilServant

        So, when are you going to bring up something I’m wrong about?

      • Not Adahn

        And you think you’re funny.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m not funny.

        I think the new puppy fumes are getting to you.

      • Animal

        Blind Melon Chitlin.

      • Gender Traitor

        Build Your Own Blues Name:

        1. Physical infirmity
        B. Fruit
        III. Last name of a U.S. President

        Examples:
        Jakeleg Kiwi Fillmore
        Harelip Berry Truman

      • Spudalicious

        Bumknee Apple Johnson.

      • TARDis

        Should have been Micropenis Strawberry Johnson.

      • Gender Traitor

        “Needledick” has a better flow (by which I mean the sound of saying it.)

        In our house “needledick weasel” was the ultimate insult you could direct at a guy.

      • TARDis

        I wanted to sound more medical. “Hi, I’m Micropenis, but my friends call me Needle.”

      • Gender Traitor

        Needledick Coconut Nixon

      • blackjack

        My kid got a toy guitar when he was two. He used to slide it around in front of him wherever he went. His name is Vinny Lee Berry. We used to announce him as Vinny Lee Berry on the slide guitar.

      • Surly Knott

        Chlamydia Mulberry Kennedy
        Ebola Durian Obama
        Small box Jackfruit Johnson
        There’s a blues trio for the ages.

      • Surly Knott

        Smallpox dammit. Why do I only neglect to proofread posts with typos?

      • TARDis

        It’s just premature posting. It happens. see your doctor.

      • Grumbletarian

        We’ll never get that on the album cover!

      • TARDis

        Damn, we’re old. I can’t even remember the name, but I know this.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    I did not find it again in a quick look. Saw an article earlier at NPR(!) basically calling on Breyer to fall on his sword for the good of the Party.

    Those damned Republicans have so effectively politicized the Supreme Court that we have no alternative but to drive out our elder statesman on the bench so that we may ensure continued control of his seat.

    I can’t wait for them to make an attempt to lynch Thomas. Maybe they’ll bring Anita Hill back.

    • Urthona

      I mean Breyer is already pretty consistently left wing.

      • Ownbestenemy

        But still adheres to parts of the old useless paper; not all of it, but enough to push the crazies to want him gone.

    • Ownbestenemy

      The day that Biden pushed his EO on the Supreme Court commission, a coincidental and totally not coordinated PAC was ready to fire off their calls for Breyer to go. These various groups are posturing and trying to secure their section of the leviathan quicker than the a regional warlord in Iraq in 2004.

  12. Hyperion

    “Danes go safetyist.”

    I hope this is safe, just ordered. Someone here recommended this brand, can’t remember now. My Bunn is on it’s deathbed and it’s not fixable. Leaks and the reservoir is full of coffee grounds, blech. One reason I liked this one is that apparently every part is replaceable.

    Coffee Maker

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Technivorm?

      Sounds like some sort of robotic parasite.

      • Hyperion

        Tulip worms I guess. Maybe coffee grounds in every cup wasn’t that bad?

    • Hyperion

      Oh shit, I forgot that Denmark doesn’t still own Holland. Hmm, maybe it’s still good and not make out of wood and tulps?

      • Swiss Servator

        Denmark never owned any part of the Low Countries.

    • The Hyperbole

      Nobody needs 26 different color options for their overpriced coffee machine.

      • Hyperion

        That’s why I only chose one color.

    • Ted S.

      40 oz. is not 10 cups.

      • blackjack

        40 oz’s is a good start that still fits in a brown paper bag.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Pours one out for the homeys…

      • zwak

        That called a sippin’ sack.

      • slumbrew

        Those are effete Dutch 4 oz. cups of coffee. Not proper ‘murican cups.

      • Enough About Palin

        I drink three large mugs of Turkish coffee every morning. In other words, about a quart. I can do anything.

      • slumbrew

        triple-shot iced americano every morning. Maybe another around 3.

        Thank you to whoever gave us the Nespresso wedding gift (her aunt, I think?).

    • R C Dean

      Excellent choice. We’ve had that model, only with the insulated carafe, for over 10 years, maybe 15. The only issue has been the filter cone holder – the little slidey thing to shut it on and off wears out every several years.

  13. The Late P Brooks

    Found it

    But as Congress has grown more ideologically polarized — and after bitter Obama- and Trump-era battles over Supreme Court seats — those confirmations have become much narrower.

    That is why many on the left are hoping that, after nearly three decades on the high court, Breyer has his eye on the exit.

    With Democrats holding the White House and the barest of Senate majorities, there is immense urgency among progressives for Breyer to announce his retirement when the Supreme Court term ends around the end of June. That push is amplified by interest and organizing among Democrats that’s centered on the courts and has increased as Republicans built a 6-3 conservative majority in the Supreme Court over the last four years.

    “If Justice Breyer is to be committed to his judicial ideology, he is going to want to be replaced on the bench by someone who is going to vote to uphold the fundamental right to vote in this country and to protect the rights of the most marginalized members of our society,” said Rep. Mondaire Jones, D-N.Y.

    ——-

    “President Obama could have had the opportunity to appoint more justices to the Supreme Court than he ultimately did,” Jones said. “And that was the result of a decision by senior-in-age justices not to retire and give him that opportunity.”

    The pressure from Democrats for Breyer to step down is often carefully crafted, with respect for the liberal justice. Connecticut Sen. Richard Blumenthal told The Washington Post in April, “Justice Breyer has been a great justice, and he recognizes, I am sure, the political reality of our having control of the Senate now. But elections always have risks, so hopefully he’s aware of that risk and he sees it accordingly.”

    He’ll retire gracefully, if he knows what’s good for him.

    • Hyperion

      Shut up the dems are busy. Did you not hear that Cali lost a house seat? Not much time left to figure out how to pack the House.

      • creech

        California may have lost a house seat but with many districts rock-solid Dem, they will be able to restructure so that it will be Cal. Republicans that lose the house seat.

    • blackjack

      The (r)’s built the court majority by following existing laws and precedence. They had the majority in the senate so they nixxed Obama’s nomination. They had the majority again so the let Barrett in. If you don’t like how it worked out, cheat harder. I’m sure they’ll let you get away with it some more.

      • Sean

        cheat harder.

        Plan on it.

      • Drake

        The composition of the Supreme Court would not matter in the least if the states and feds weren’t constantly making unconstitutional power grabs.

    • Sensei

      +1 Rainbow flag

      • Sensei

        You always learn something on Glibs.

      • UnCivilServant

        Your utility and milage may vary.

    • grrizzly

      Still mostly peaceful.

    • blackjack

      Were they all hyped up on meth? Might have been Ed Buck’s doing is al I’m sayin’

    • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

      So I guess this joke doesn’t apply:

      The National Park Rangers are advising hikers in Glacier National Park and other Rocky Mountain parks to be alert for bears and take extra precautions to avoid an encounter.
      They advise park visitors to wear little bells on their clothes so they make noise when hiking. The bell noise allows bears to hear them coming from a distance and not be startled by a hiker accidentally sneaking up on them. This might cause a bear to charge.
      Visitors should also carry a pepper spray can just in case a bear is encountered. Spraying the pepper into the air will irritate the bear’s sensitive nose and it will run away.
      It is also a good idea to keep an eye out for fresh bear scat so you have an idea if bears are in the area. People should be able to recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear scat.
      Black bear droppings are smaller and often contain berries, leaves, and possibly bits of fur. Grizzly bear droppings tend to contain small bells and smell of pepper.

      • The Gunslinger

        That’s a good one.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Real world answer, if attacked by a Grizzly, play dead, but if attacked by a black bear, fight for your life, because they will eat you for playing dead.

      • creech

        What, no coof masks in the scat?

  14. grrizzly

    NH is #1.

    New Hampshire led the states with 60.7 percent of residents having gotten at least a first dose or a single dose of the Johnson & Johnson vaccine, according to data from the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

    New Hampshire was followed by Massachusetts (57.3 percent), Vermont (56.6), Connecticut (55.6), and Maine (55.2). Decidedly non-New England Hawaii (53.7) was next on the list, but Rhode Island (53.3) followed quickly behind.

    • Not Adahn

      Well, how hard can it be to vaccinate fourteen people?

    • Sensei

      Don’t they only need like one pallet of medication for the whole state?

    • Rat on a train

      I’ve seen chatter out there with suggestions of what to do with those who don’t get vaccinated.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Free camping trips?

  15. The Late P Brooks

    I mean Breyer is already pretty consistently left wing.

    He’s old and he’s the only one they have any conceivable leverage on. It’s not like Thomas is going to just hand his seat to a Biden appointee.

    (see, also: Ginsberg, Ruth)

    • Sean

      That’s a pretty wide path.

    • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

      Hopefully not Madrid. The others can suck it up.

    • slumbrew

      Beijing getting showered by debris would be fitting, I suppose.

    • LCDR_Fish

      It’d be interesting if we used it for another BMD demo, but I think unlike the satellite in 2008, this one is just too erratic.

  16. Count Potato

    “A new CIA recruitment video has been widely ridiculed online after the recruit described herself as an ‘intersectional cisgender millennial’.

    The unnamed CIA officer, 36, tells viewers she is ‘unapologetically me’, adding that she to suffer from ‘imposter syndrome’ but now refuses to ‘internalize misguided patriarchal ideas of what a woman can or should be.'”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9537893/The-CIAs-woke-recruitment-video-gets-panned.html

    OFFS!

    • Rat on a train

      It’s a clever plan. Counterintelligence would never suspect these people really work for the CIA.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Counterintelligence would never suspect these people really work.

    • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

      It’s like someone watched Homeland and assumed that crazy was a prerequisite for being a good agent.

    • creech

      Don’t laugh, that’s probably what Bond..James Bond..will be saying in the new woke 007 movie.

    • EvilSheldon

      Being ‘unapologetically’ one’s self while trying to develop sources and run agents in Yemen or Pakistan or Beijing, sounds like an excellent way to end up a star on the lobby wall.

      So I’m guessing this weenie is probably a DA careerist.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    One group pushing Breyer to step down is Demand Justice, which sent a black and neon-green billboard truck driving around the Supreme Court building last month. The billboard’s message: “Breyer, retire. It’s time for a Black woman Supreme Court justice,” referencing Biden’s campaign vow to nominate a Black woman to the court.

    Wait- Barack is transitioning?

    • rhywun

      It’s time for a Black woman Supreme Court justice

      Why?

      • Enough About Palin

        Because someone needs to slap the black off of Associate Justice Thomas.

      • Animal

        Because fuck qualifications, it’s all about plumbing and melanin content. Nothing else matters.

      • zwak

        She could do things a wise Latina could only dream of; fly, cast devils into pigs, see the future.

  18. Tonio

    Thanks, Count.

    In more bear news, climate change causing bear interspecies mating. Presenting the Pizzly Bear.

    • The Hyperbole

      Grolar is a better name than Pizzly.

      • Rat on a train

        I’m waiting for the Groala.

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        That would be like bear midget porn.

        Wait, is a koala even a bear? That’s even kinkier.

      • UnCivilServant

        Donno, but attempts would just give the Grizzly chlamydia.

      • Cowboy

        Which reminds me of my favorite profanity riddled rants:

        Koalas are fucking horrible animals. They have one of the smallest brain to body ratios of any mammal, additionally – their brains are smooth. A brain is folded to increase the surface area for neurons. If you present a koala with leaves plucked from a branch, laid on a flat surface, the koala will not recognise it as food. They are too thick to adapt their feeding behaviour to cope with change. In a room full of potential food, they can literally starve to death. This is not the token of an animal that is winning at life. Speaking of stupidity and food, one of the likely reasons for their primitive brains is the fact that additionally to being poisonous, eucalyptus leaves (the only thing they eat) have almost no nutritional value. They can’t afford the extra energy to think, they sleep more than 80% of their fucking lives. When they are awake all they do is eat, shit and occasionally scream like fucking satan. Because eucalyptus leaves hold such little nutritional value, koalas have to ferment the leaves in their guts for days on end. Unlike their brains, they have the largest hind gut to body ratio of any mammal. Many herbivorous mammals have adaptations to cope with harsh plant life taking its toll on their teeth, rodents for instance have teeth that never stop growing, some animals only have teeth on their lower jaw, grinding plant matter on bony plates in the tops of their mouths, others have enlarged molars that distribute the wear and break down plant matter more efficiently… Koalas are no exception, when their teeth erode down to nothing, they resolve the situation by starving to death, because they’re fucking terrible animals. Being mammals, koalas raise their joeys on milk (admittedly, one of the lowest milk yields to body ratio… There’s a trend here). When the young joey needs to transition from rich, nourishing substances like milk, to eucalyptus (a plant that seems to be making it abundantly clear that it doesn’t want to be eaten), it finds it does not have the necessary gut flora to digest the leaves. To remedy this, the young joey begins nuzzling its mother’s anus until she leaks a little diarrhoea (actually fecal pap, slightly less digested), which he then proceeds to slurp on. This partially digested plant matter gives him just what he needs to start developing his digestive system. Of course, he may not even have needed to bother nuzzling his mother. She may have been suffering from incontinence. Why? Because koalas are riddled with chlamydia. In some areas the infection rate is 80% or higher. This statistic isn’t helped by the fact that one of the few other activities koalas will spend their precious energy on is rape. Despite being seasonal breeders, males seem to either not know or care, and will simply overpower a female regardless of whether she is ovulating. If she fights back, he may drag them both out of the tree, which brings us full circle back to the brain: Koalas have a higher than average quantity of cerebrospinal fluid in their brains. This is to protect their brains from injury… should they fall from a tree. An animal so thick it has its own little built in special ed helmet. I fucking hate them.

        Tldr; Koalas are stupid, leaky, STI riddled sex offenders. But, hey. They look cute. If you ignore the terrifying snake eyes and terrifying feet.

      • Spudalicious

        That was awesome.

      • LCDR_Fish

        Is there a meme img link of this? May have to replace some samizdat SEAL replies with this one.

      • Tonio

        Australians. Seriously.

      • Tonio

        No, koalas are marsupials. They look similar to bears, but that’s the convergent evolution talking.

        All true bears, even the vegetarian Panda, share a common carnivore ancestor.

      • UnCivilServant

        Panda’s still have a digestive tract built for meat.

        It’s almost as if the species is trying to go extinct.

      • Tonio

        Agreed. Pizzly sounds too much like pizzle. Which may have been the point.

        Grolar sounds like growler, which is good since bears growl. And like beer.

      • Animal

        Can confirm.

    • Not Adahn

      Isn’t that a Grolar bear with who’s on top switched?

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s probably along the lines of the Liger-Tigon issue where the hybrids have different characteristics depending upon which is the mother species and which is the father.

      • The Hyperbole

        And I just bet it’s the father that determines which name goes first, fucking patriarchy.

    • Count Potato

      Is there anything not caused by climate change?

      • Bobarian LMD

        Good weather.

        Good weather is just weather.

        Bad weather is climate change.

    • Enough About Palin

      I cannot read the article and maybe it mentions it, but recall seeing on PBS that polar bears are just grizzly bears that adopted to the last ice age.

    • grrizzly

      Wow!

    • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

      Hopefully that means that Bill will stop trying to save the world.

    • blackjack

      HALF!!!

      • slumbrew

        Eddie!

        I think we get put in camps for even listening to that now.

    • Drake

      I thought she was a Satanist?

    • Sensei

      Microsoft Bob has a frown.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Clippy is gonna be a latchkey kid now. He’s probably having a hard time of it since he couldn’t hold things together.

      • The Other Kevin

        Poor kid’s going to get bent out of shape.

      • Swiss Servator

        *narrows gaze at both of ya*

      • Sensei

        “It looks like you’re writing a divorce decree…”

    • The Other Kevin

      Wow. Get ready for an avalanche of conspiracy theories and a big tell-all.

    • slumbrew

      Next month she hooks up with MacKenzie Scott (Bezos’ ex)…

      • Annoyed Nomad

        She does kind of look like a man (with a wig) in the photos in those articles. NTTAWWT.

      • slumbrew

        You have to admit though. Kevin Kline is a hell of an actor to stay in character for 27 years though.

        *dies*

      • TARDis

        *sigh*

      • TARDis

        You have to admit though. Kevin Kline is a hell of an actor to stay in character for 27 years though.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Everybody knows she’s been banging Clippy since the 90’s.

    • grrizzly

      How long should we wait for all the juicy details to come out? Who cheated with whom?

    • slumbrew

      Who gets the foundation in the divorce?

    • Don Escaped Texas

      Bill always looks like Kermit the Frog to me.

      Suddenly it occurs to me that he married Sam the Eagle.

  19. Enough About Palin

    “Chinese post mocking India’s COVID-19 deaths pulled after outrage: report”

    What I don’t understand is why all of the world’s countries haven’t filed a class-action suit against the Red Chinese.

    • creech

      Maybe if Trump had tried that he would have won.

  20. Annoyed Nomad

    My 5-year-old granddaughter’s joke of the day:

    Why did the dog poop on the tablet?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    Because it had to poop!

    • Annoyed Nomad

      She’s already learned that poop jokes always work.

    • Ted S.

      So did the dog actually poop on your tablet?

      • Annoyed Nomad

        Not mine, but they have 2 dogs at her house. I think she’s learned that when a dog has to poop, it has to poop.

      • Enough About Palin

        That’s the one piece of information they are missing from solving the theory of everything. And it’s right there on the tablet!

    • Ted S.

      Why did the condom cross the road?

      .

      .

      .

      .

      .

      Because it was pissed off.

      • Annoyed Nomad

        Lol, I’ll wait to tell her that one.

      • blackjack

        I thought it was because he was chock full of nuts?

      • The Hyperbole

        ‘It was stuck in the chicken’ was the way I remember it.

      • blackjack

        This joke is where the rubber meets the road.

  21. Shpip

    Gov. DeSantis laying the hammer on the Branch Covidians.

    Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is taking executive action to suspend all local COVID-19 emergency mandates immediately and is issuing an executive order to outlaw all local COVID-19 emergency mandates in the state effective July 1.

    DeSantis cited the ample availability of vaccines in the Sunshine State and said supply has now eclipsed demand. According to Centers for Disease Control and Prevention data, 20.9 million doses have been distributed to the state, and 15.5 million shots have been administered in a state with a population of roughly 21.5 million people. DeSantis made the announcement as he signed a bill that bans entities, including private businesses, from requiring so-called “vaccine passports” and that amends the state’s Emergency Management Act by placing limits on local emergency powers.

    “What I’m going to do is sign the bill, it’s effective July 1,” DeSantis said at the bill signing Monday in St. Petersburg. “I will also sign an executive order pursuant to that bill invalidating all remaining local emergency COVID orders effective on July 1. But then to bridge the gap between then and now, I am going to suspend, under my executive power, the local emergency orders as it relates to COVID. I think that’s the evidence-based thing to do.”

    But wait, there’s more!

    DeSantis had already unilaterally banned even private businesses from requiring proof of vaccination to enter. The law banning vaccine passports, effective July 1, entails a $5,000 fine any time a business or school requires proof of vaccination for entry.

    The cruise industry in south Florida is probably having kittens right now, since all of their models for reopening were predicated on placating coof-spooked oldsters.

    • slumbrew

      Dammit, I really don’t like the Florida heat, but it’s like he’s trying to make me move.

      • Tonio

        It’s so damn hot there, even in the panhandle.

      • slumbrew

        All swamp-ass, all the time.

      • blackjack

        I’m in Daytona in July. Fucking July! For a wedding. I think I can weasel my way onto the plane without being coof proof. I will, however, have to quarantine for 10 days when I get back on the city’s dime. Looks like I can skip the jabbbing after all.

    • Sensei

      Agree on the cruise folks.

    • Tonio

      They’ll stop doing passenger pickup in FL. Either take a shuttle to Bahamas, or drive north to Savannah or Charleston.

      • grrizzly

        How about stop reinforcing the psychosis and just pick up passengers in FL as always without demanding the proof of vaccination? Not that I know about much the cruise industry.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Think Karens on a cruise ship, the industry is fucked either way,

      • TARDis

        Meh. Oh well. Been on one cruise. It was okay, in a captive Las Vegas sort of way. The food was good though. The mega ships, despite being wonders of engineering and construction hold no vacation appeal to me. Floating malls comes to mind.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Has there been a cruise ship zombie movie yet?

      • Tonio

        [Furiously scribbles notes for future story. Scruffy analog will be zombified first.]

      • TARDis

        “Okay, here are your provisions. Two full canteens of water. Four pre-selected MREs. One loaded single stack 9mm. One loaded .380. One first aid kit (does not protect from zombie bites). Two rolls of TP. You selected deluxe provisioning so you also get 4 tampons, 2 napkins, and one KA-BAR. There are various armament and ammo locations as you ‘level up’. 48 hours. Good luck, happy couple.”

      • LCDR_Fish

        Look up the Dark Tide Rising series of books by John Ringo. Begs to be made into an anime based on the characters…other than the fact that the virus makes you strip before you go “living” dead…which could be problematic for a lot of shots obviously.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      Given the choice between mandatory vaccines and being banned from requiring vaccines, I choose the latter. Liberty is a scarce commodity these days.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I think there’s a very simple libertarian solution. Business are free to require vaccines but are banned from using government resources for this effort. Let the businesses shoulder the free market cost of building the infrastructure, tracking, and verification of vaccine information.

        If a business is tying to use government funded databases to shield themselves from the cost, liability, and other consequences of such a requirement, I see no libertarian objection to banning the requiring vaccines.

      • The Hyperbole

        Just to be clear, are you arguing that if an establishment wanted to be 35 and over only, they couldn’t require a state issued drivers license but have to use some Underwriters Laboratories-ish proof of age certificate?

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        My preference would be for government issued ID to be restricted only for government-related purposes (e.g., recording the deed when purchasing a house). If an establishment wants to restrict clientele for any reason, then it should be incumbent on them to fund the means of restriction.

        You didn’t ask this, but I’ll volunteer that I’m not a fan of drivers licenses regardless. A government ID should only be needed for a very few, clearly defined purposes.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        And yes, to directly answer your question. A business should seek free market age verification options if they desire to restrict their customers based on age.

      • The Hyperbole

        Does the fact that I paid $25.75 for my DL matter? Seems to me that I paid for the cost of the “proof of age” not the state.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I don’t see what the cost matters. It’s a fundamental question of what you believe the role of government should be.

        My belief is that some small level of government is necessary, business should be free to restrict their clientele as desired, and government should not subsidizing (at best) or encouraging (at worst) discrimination. Let the free markets decide.

        Seems to me that I paid for the cost of the “proof of age” not the state.

        Seems to me like a very good reason for removing age from driver’s licenses.

      • The Hyperbole

        The cost matters if your argument is that the businesses aren’t bearing the cost of enforcing their rules but are relying on the state to do so. I’m not sure why a business stating ‘we require you (the customer) to provide proof of age* and we accept these documents as proof’ (documents the customer bears the responsibility of obtaining) is somehow wrong if one of the accepted docs is state issued.

        *or nationality, or place of residence, or membership in Mensa, or anything else the business wants to require.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        Cost is beyond the price of acquisition. It also includes liability and enforcement.

        It sounds like you believe in a more involved role of government than I do. It’s a fundamental difference that can’t be argued away.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        Just to clarify, that was meant in good faith. Some of our resident anarchists would fundamentally disagree with me that even providing government identification for deed registration would be too involved a role.

      • The Hyperbole

        I believe a business should be able to refuse service for whatever reason even if it involves state sponsored identification, The fact that the state shouldn’t be involved in issuing identification is irrelevant, I’m getting the feeling we are talking about two different issues here. I can be against State ID’s but still allow private businesses to require them.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I can be against State ID’s but still allow private businesses to require them.

        That’s fair. My main point is government involvement distorts the free market and provides incentives that wouldn’t ordinarily exist. For example, government IDs have the force of law backing them up. The Feds have already announced federal charges for anyone counterfeiting a gov issued Covid vax document. The private sector may decide that a vaccine passport could never be implemented because such documents are too easily forge. Or perhaps the passports are difficult to forge, but a large proportion tries anyway because they only face civil charges, at most.

        TL,DR: The involvement by the government distorts the free market and encourages the private sector to do things like requiring vaccine passports that the free market couldn’t easily achieve without ongoing government support.

      • The Hyperbole

        Not sure that it’s something that the private sector couldn’t easily do, but you are correct that government action creates distortions, how much of that is inevitable or acceptable I don’t know. And I guess that’s the crux of the biscuit. I’m trying, but I haven’t gone full anarchist yet.

    • Swiss Servator

      Coof spooked wouldn’t go, regardless of the papers, please.

      • Shpip

        I’m not so sure about that.

        A wide majority of respondents — 81 percent — said they would cruise if vaccines were required. Only 5 percent said that a vaccine requirement would absolutely deter them from cruising. The other 14 percent said that they were unsure.

        Count me among the five percent.

        My favorite cruise line is requiring both jabs, plus a negative coof test before they’ll let you board… for now, anyway.

      • Ted S.

        The only cruises I’d take are day trips, or ferries.

    • Urthona

      On one hand, I want to say “nyah nyah”.

      On the other hand, I kinda think cities should be able to have their shitty local orders that are driving everyone out.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Meh, seen bigger and better lately,

    • The Hyperbole

      It’s as if all of TNT’s efforts were in vain.

      It’s sad really.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’m crying on the inside.

      • slumbrew

        Did he finally pass out or did he get bounced?

      • blackjack

        You guys were meant to him. All he wanted was some deodorant. He kept saying, ” Ban me!”

      • TARDis

        I’m hoping for some extra Q NSFW links for the night shift to compensate for TNT’s pissiness.

      • Q Continuum

        I think I missed something…

        Is someone in trouble?

      • Count Potato

        Someone made a lame attempt at trolling this morning’s links.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        He’s a punk ass bitch!

      • Not Adahn

        Edit fairy started removing his links once he got to furry porn.

      • blackjack

        He never did post any left handed midget albino lesbians.

    • Tonio

      Naturals surprisingly well-represented. Thanks.

      • Ownbestenemy

        We were discussing our youngest the other day and his sexuality came up. Wifey said “I don’t think so, he has always been a boob-man”

        I just tapped my nose.

  22. Broswater

    News from the new frontier : aka Quebec / Ontario. Sorry if it’s too local.

    Yesterday, the GF and I had some, for ”realzies” this time, essential business to do in Ontario. People with Quebec’s license plate are controlled going in, but not people with Ontario plates.

    Every now and then, the SQ (Quebec Provincial Police) make a show and control people coming in from Ontario.

    But nobody was there yesterday. Nor were they there today until around 3h45 PM.

    So Ontarians are free to go in and out as they please, but not Quebecers, nor probably are Manitobans.

    Now I’m no fan of the COVID theater and lockdowns, but that… that doesn’t make any effing sense at all.

    If it’s not just messing with regular people because Respect my Authoritay!! I don’t know what this is about.

    • Tonio

      Please be more specific about controls… is this like internal checkpoints and border control?

      • Broswater

        That article is from April 6 2020

        From what I’ve heard, they pretty much stopped doing road check between Gatineau and Ottawa, (just a river between Canada’s Capital in Ontario and it’s dormitory in Quebec, like Arlington and Washington) because the police had too many complaints.

        Journalists going to Montreal for last Saturday’s protest were blocked going thru the direct route (Highway 401) but weren’t even stopped going thru Gatineau.

        Of course, the public servants won’t be bothered by this like the rest of hoi polloi.

      • Broswater

        They stop you and ask you why you are trying to cross the border and where you are going. They don’t even ask for ID or anything. I don’t think they even take your license plate number.

        Anyone could use the excuse we had yesterday : going to pick up / drop off the daughter at her dad’s, and be done with it.

        So far they never asked for an address or even any form of shared custody court paper.

        You’re also authorized to cross for work.

        The only people that get refused are the honest ones, as always is the case.

        So pretty much, just a neat excuse to harass citizen and rack in overtime.

        Although I definitively don’t agree with going all ”Paper Please”, I’d at least have some respect if they did it somewhat efficiently.

        Not the case. This is a joke on the taxpayer’s dime. I’m no fan of Defund the Police, but they are now clearly working hard at making themselves look useless and incompetent.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I knew he was a FAG!
      Fans
      Against
      Government

    • kinnath

      Awesomeness.

    • Tonio

      “You could drown a toddler in my panties about now.” -Pam Poovey

  23. Count Potato

    “Big Corporations Now Deploying Woke Ideology the Way Intelligence Agencies Do: As a Disguise

    By draping itself in the finery of political activism, the corporatist class consolidates political power, corrupts democracy and distracts from its real functions.

    The British spy agency GCHQ is so aggressive, extreme and unconstrained by law or ethics that the NSA — not exactly world renowned for its restraint — often farms out spying activities too scandalous or illegal for the NSA to their eager British counterparts. There is, as the Snowden reporting demonstrated, virtually nothing too deceitful or invasive for the GCHQ. They spy on entire populations, deliberately disseminate fake news, exploit psychological research to control behavior and manipulate public perception, and destroy the reputations, including through the use of sex traps, of anyone deemed adversarial to the British government.

    But they want you to know that they absolutely adore gay people. In fact, they love the cause of LGBT equality so very much that, beginning on May 17, 2015 — International Day against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia — they started draping their creepy, UFO-style headquarters in the colors of the rainbow flag. The prior year, in 2014, they had merely raised the rainbow flag in front of their headquarters, but in 2015, they announced, “we wanted to make a bold statement to show the nation we serve how strongly we believe in this.””

    https://greenwald.substack.com/p/big-corporations-now-deploying-woke

    • Count Potato

      “Residing beyond the dangers of even greater corporatist control over our lives and politics is the deceitful branding and distractions that this exploitation of social causes, by design, engender. If large corporations are crusading for voting rights, why would anyone regard them as a menace? The contrary is true: we should be grateful for their noble activism.

      When it comes time to identify the root causes of social pathologies, we will look elsewhere. The concentration of wealth and power in the hands of the corporate class and the ways they abuse and eliminate labor, control government, and destroy the working and middle classes will be impossible to see, as we are all blinded by the glare of their virtuous Instagram posts about racial justice and their unified campaigns against voter suppression. In an instant of swooning over their benevolent devotion to social justice, we will forget what they actually exist to do. When we work to harness their power to support our own political causes, we forget about how out of control and menacing that power is, and what it is most often used for. And that is exactly the way they want it.”

    • wdalasio

      Greenwald always seems to get close, but never make that last connection. The corrupt corporatists aren’t hiding anything. They really do want massive government control over the economy. They support all the same interventions he does. They realize something he doesn’t. Corporatism isn’t about getting rich or richer. It’s about locking your situation in. It’s aim is to make sure no upstarts or outsiders come in and undercut you. Although it never really works (infighting about which gang holds the reins stops it), it’s about stasis.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        ???

    • kbolino

      It’s not a disguise. They really do believe it (well, as much as anyone does). It might be a distraction, but if so it’s not really intentional. Not every employee is a true believer, but enough of them are that portraying it as a ruse is misleading.

  24. DEG

    To limit the risk of importing new coronavirus variants, the Commission also proposed a new “emergency brake” that would allow the swift introduction of travel restrictions from countries where the health situation deteriorates sharply.

    That would inspire confidence.

    /sarcasm

    • creech

      Also, racist (if a pol with an R after his or her name were to propose it.)

    • slumbrew

      So many Navy jokes…

      • blackjack

        Went right over my head.

      • Bobarian LMD

        My favorite.

        You know why the Navy uses powdered soap?

        It’s harder to drop but it takes such a long time to pick it back up.

      • Tonio

        I don’t get it.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Id offer to show you but I think you’d get into a bit too much.

    • Ownbestenemy

      The amount of training and waste of resources to get, I would assume, the properly trained personnel for each job on the bird, makes it all the more ridiculous.

      • LCDR_Fish

        Based on the number of folks assigned to a squadron, doesn’t seem improbable that you could come up with one – probably coordinated in a facebook group to try and move some assignments around – the rescue swimmer normally comes from the ship the helo is attached to. Either way still cringe.

      • Ownbestenemy

        True….misallocation of finite resources for a Tweet is more accurate.

    • Tonio

      First admitted.

      So, it’s like a Village People song. NTTAWWT. (Would and wood all.)

    • blackjack

      Lemme guess, the helicopter had no closets and all of the doors were backdoors?

    • TARDis

      Whatever. Call me when there is a photo of four cis-het female helicopter crew hotties openly calling themselves the Fellaters.

  25. DEG

    Second Pfizer shot yesterday…ugh. By evening, I was running down. Still not quite sentient today. These links will reflect that…

    I should have read this before reading the links.

    Get well!

    • Ownbestenemy

      Risky behavior leads to risk behavior, news at 11!

    • Tonio

      There is no cannibalism in the Royal Navy!

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Psst, it’s the Buggery Mate,

    • Endless Mike

      Hedonists, going to …. uh… hedonize?

    • Chafed

      We need a ruling from Creosote Achilles.

      • Creosote Achilles

        I suspect it is true. Personally, my drugs of choice are nicotine from cigars, and bourbon. That said, my experience with the scene is that this makes sense. The same impulse to try novel sexual experiences is likely to carry over to trying illicit substances. The scene use to have people more willing to embrace risk. So this is probably passably true. Also, lots of fucked-up people in the scene with mental issues who are self-medicating. That can’t be discounted.

  26. DEG

    Covid Restrictions Fall-out

    AT 96, LEO BUOTE wants the simple things in life: Sunshine on his face. A cookout at his daughter’s house in Merrimack. A draft Miller Lite at his favorite Manchester watering hole, Billy’s Sports Bar & Grill.

    But he can’t have them.

    The sad fact is that the World War II Navy veteran is a prisoner, confined to a nursing home under shifting COVID-19 restrictions that prevent even fully vaccinated people from getting out and enjoying their final years.

    Before anyone accuses me of launching into a pandemic denial rant, consider:

    Buote has been fully vaccinated. Given his age and nursing home residency, he was part of the first wave of New Hampshire vaccinations. His 14-day period for full effectiveness kicked in weeks ago, according to his daughter, Wendi Murphy.

    Buote has survived COVID-19. The disease hit him in March or April 2020, just as the pandemic struck and devastated nursing homes. He developed a mild case of pneumonia and never had to be hospitalized, he said.

    As of last week, his nursing home, Hanover Hill Health Care Center, had no active cases of COVID-19. But under state recommendations, Hanover Hill must remain at the lowest level of freedom — Phase Zero — for 14 days after a COVID patient’s negative test.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      or else what? he can’t just walk out? FFS!

    • Tonio

      But under state recommendations, Hanover Hill must remain at the lowest level of freedom — Phase Zero — for 14 days after a COVID patient’s negative test.

      Recommendations…must remain. One of those things is not like the other.

      • DEG

        HAH!

        Here’s an example of words not meaning what you think.

      • rhywun

        I can’t imagine receiving that tripe as a businessowner and not going postal.

      • blackjack

        I can. I ran a business in Los Angeles.

      • blackjack

        In fairness, I did go postal, many times. The people who enforce this bullshit are trained to deal with massive amounts of hatred and vitriol. There’s a line where they get to call in the goons.

    • Gustave Lytton

      That’s what “protecting the vulnerable” imbecility looks like.

    • Suthenboy

      I dont know why y’all continue to argue on their terms. Call them out. This has nothing at all to do with public health. It is partly about culling the herd and getting their boot on our necks. Leftists are as predictable as the sunrise.
      They have lied at every turn. None of their predictions were even close. This is about scaring people into compliance and coercing those who arent scared.

      Stop arguing on their terms and call them out.

  27. trshmnstr the terrible

    Lol, how much of a fad is pearl clutching about bias in AI? Enough that I have two meetings on the same topic from completely different groups at the same time tomorrow.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Look man, everybody knows that when Skynet awakes, it’s going to kill all the minorities first.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      And I’ve noticed that “bias in AI” is usually a result of datasets that yield conclusions that don’t agree with accepted leftist dogma.

      • Count Potato

        If they want it to agree with leftists, then they should make artificial unintelligence.

    • Urthona

      Yup. The problem they really have with AI is that it’s unbiased.

      • kbolino

        AI is only unbiased in the sense that it is incapable of original thought and thus cannot come up with a bias of its own. It will directly reflect the biases of its programmed priors and the biases in its training data. A comically racist example can arise in face recognition. Given nothing but white faces to recognize, an AI face recognition model will tend to categorize adult Asians as babies. The factors it is comparing show that to be the closest match against what it already “knows”. However, give it enough adult Asian faces in the training data and it will stop making that mistake. You could also reverse the arrangement (train exclusively on Asian faces, try to identify white face) and get a different categorization error.

        The thing about AI is that it is incapable of making good decisions on its own. It is simply an advanced pattern matching engine. Used well, it can accelerate (but not replace) human judgment and reduce tedium. Used poorly, it does the opposite.

      • Urthona

        I question whether that should be defined as bias, although I see the point.

      • kbolino

        Ignorance is the source of much bias, though knowledge brings its own set of biases too.

      • Tulip

        ^this^

    • Tulip

      No, the bias is real and can enter through the data, or how the algorithm is designed. It affects much more than just race and gender and it really is something that needs to be watched for.

      • westernsloper

        You would know.

      • Tulip

        You wouldn’t want me to send you to the wrong hellhole.

  28. Aloysious

    HA!

    That main page picture.

  29. Yusef drives a Kia

    Bobby Unser, R.I.P

    • TARDis

      Ok, these old people I watched as a child need to stop dying. I’m starting to feel old(er).
      *checks intertoobs*
      Oh good, A.J. is still breathing.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        It’s a miracle, he’s Yuge!

      • TARDis

        Doesn’t have to fit in that tiny seat anymore so it’s all good.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        No shit, at least Dale Earnhardt’s still around.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Does Juan Montoya still crash into jet Driers?

    • blackjack

      That crew will end up highly decorated and working in the dept. of interior, Imma guess.

    • kbolino

      Instead of drugs, are there dildoes falling out of their asses?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Ugh. Stop using jokes from a year ago and while I am at it…What about Bob and where are my titty picks. Cause that is the only reason I am here

      • slumbrew

        Your pic link is above, sir.

      • westernsloper

        This was a top notch comment.

      • blackjack

        I appreciated it.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        What about me? Am I chopped Liver here? Why I outta…..

      • Ownbestenemy

        You know I was with him and even understand what Mad Sci was saying but you get to a point where you attack a place that regardless of your faults and lows that will step up and take the time to listen just put me in the mindset of screw you buddy.

        I would gladly have titty pics and stories of how messed up our world is if it means we can be human when it matters most.

      • blackjack

        Man, if they erased half of what’s here and replaced it with garbage, it’d still beat out every other similar spot. Fuck that guy for complaining.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        He shit on my article once, total dick move, it will not happen again, then he came back all nice to me, so I was cool, then he tried this morning, little Fuck,

      • Ownbestenemy

        Its a product of Social Media and the always connected generation. The need to say whatever is on your mind.

  30. UnCivilServant

    My CPU is running too hot. I’m going to start my attempt at fixing it by replacing the thermal paste. It’s the cheapest next step since my work on the airflow didn’t help.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Eek. Yeah thermal paste might prolong its death.

      • UnCivilServant

        If this doesn’t work I have to change out the heatsink/fan. I don’t want to do that, because too many overhang onto the space where the RAM is supposed to be.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Yes and it is annoying. A closed loop water cooler typically offers the smallest real estate at the cpu level but you need room else where.

      • UnCivilServant

        Got any recommendations with regards to vendor/product?

      • Ownbestenemy

        I usually use pc part picker to ensure compatibility. I think the last one I had was an EVGA with a two fan radiator but it only lasted two years?

    • Gender Traitor

      Our Senior VP of IT was back today and finished putting in the service call for my CPU’s fan. I hope they show up soon to do the under-warranty service so I don’t have to power it down every night and so I can move the fan that’s supposed to be for MY comfort off my already-too-cluttered desk.

      • UnCivilServant

        Here’s hoping.

        In my case, this is my home computer, made from parts and upgraded part by part over the years. There’s no one to call for this.

      • TARDis

        How are the other components on the MB looking? Any leaking caps, burned spots, or smells?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Are we talking about a computer or an abused foster kid?

      • UnCivilServant

        No.

        The problem is that the CPU idles at 140-150 F, and in video games can go up to within a few degrees fo TMax.

      • UnCivilServant

        *idles at 130. Runs normal use at 140-150.

      • kbolino

        If you have any free 120 or 140 mm fan slots, put more fans in there. I prefer positive pressure, so more fans blowing in than out, as it makes dust somewhat easier to control (put filters on the intake fans if the case doesn’t come with them. 60C is not a good idle temp.

        If you don’t have any 120 or 140 mm fan slots, throw your case out and get a new one. The days of 80 mm fans are long gone; the consumer-grade ones just can’t push enough air.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Yep stick your nose in there and take a big snort. My kids used to laugh at me when I did that.

      • UnCivilServant

        I think you mistake me. The bulk of the machine is fine. The motherboard and GPU temps are fine. It’s just the CPU that is running higher than it should. The problem is that I can’t have prolonged gaming sessions.

      • Ownbestenemy

        You mistake me.

      • UnCivilServant

        Entirely possible, I’m doing too many things at once and may have responded to the wrong person.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Are you overclocking?

      • TARDis

        If your idle and normal ops temps are good, it does sound like a direct cooling issue. I’ve had that happen before. The heatsink would not clamp down properly on my CPU. It would overheat within minutes and shutdown. Thermal paste does have a lifespan. I hate messing with that stuff.

  31. westernsloper

    AOL still exists?

    • hayeksplosives

      You’ve got Mail!

      • UnCivilServant

        Why is instant messenger still broke?

      • blackjack

        I’ll have what she’s having.

    • Not Adahn

      Yup. I’ve got an email address from them older than some of the commentariat.

  32. westernsloper

    Second Pfizer shot yesterday…ugh. By evening, I was running down. Still not quite sentient today.

    Oh why why why Swiss? I hope you feel better soon.

  33. Scruffy Nerfherder

    14 year-olds are unpleasant people.

    • blackjack

      It’s about a 6 year window, I hear. Glad mine’s only 8.

      • Mojeaux

        For now.

    • westernsloper

      Ask them if they want to make it to 15.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I fired the warning shot this evening. I’m tired of the angry all the time and I hate everyone schtick.

      • Mojeaux

        There is nothing that can cut that. They can fake it for a while, but it pops out eventually.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Physical activity helps. She’s currently a slug that doesn’t get off her ass.

        Wish me luck in getting that kick started.

      • Mojeaux

        Lawnmowing ahoy!

      • westernsloper

        No shit don’t put up with that. That is my schtick. But it took me more than 15 years of life to get there. I was happy up until I got married in my mid 20’s.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Wanna trade for two, slight beaten and slight damaged 16 year olds?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Two slumbrews in one post..After work beer awaits.

    • Mojeaux

      Also, they do unpleasant things.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yeah, I’m waiting for the acting out in spite bit. She’s already doing the passive aggressive bit quite well.

      • Mojeaux

        I would rather have covert misbehavior over passive-aggressive hostility. It’s crazymaking.

    • The Hyperbole

      Wow, you people suck at raising chilluns. No wonder so many people think the government should be in charge. Seriously, up your child rearing game or the man’s gonna do it for you.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Is that an offer?

      • The Hyperbole

        Sure, I can always use more orphans.

      • Mojeaux

        You can have my 15yo too.

      • The Hyperbole

        If you can get him to North Central Ohio I will put him to work.

      • westernsloper

        Every 15 year old should learn how to frame a house. I support this comment. (although I did not learn until I was 18).

      • blackjack

        Framing was the form of construction I hated the least. I did most of them at some point. If only for a few months per.

      • westernsloper

        I say drop them in the woods and see if they can make it home. Like your neighbors puppies that bark all night.

      • Don Escaped Texas

        It’s that old one-tail problem: I have a perfect kid, for example, but, of course, I never complain about him . . . skews the “data.”

        Thankless Jobs Ranked
        5 traffic cope
        4 Little League umpire
        3 HOA treasurer
        2 Quality Manager
        1 parent

      • hayeksplosives

        No one ever put up a statue of a critic.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Foolishness is bound in the heart of the child but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
      -The Bible (or maybe Bloom County was pulling my leg)

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Col. G. Money, damn sweet name.

      • hayeksplosives

        I worked with a guy whose last name was Danger, with an alliterative first name. Frikken sweet

        EXCEPT

        he insisted that the pronunciation rhymed with “hanger”. Lame!

        If my name were Danger, I’d damned well make the most of it.

    • Don Escaped Texas

      * definitely not using joke from last year *

      • Ownbestenemy

        *chuckles*

      • Don Escaped Texas

        I thought real hard about some way to pull of some ginormous meta joke there, but I’m just too stale to pull it off: I can’t think in reverse snake-eats-its-tail logic..

    • Urthona

      They were more efficient working together.

      This way third worlders could be vaccinated and sterilized at the same time.

    • kbolino

      I’d say she doesn’t deserve a penny of it, but he’s become such a Bond villain that I don’t really care if he gets fucked.

      • Unreconstructed

        Was she still employed at Microsoft when they were forced to start offering stock? If so, she may have a legit (but definitely smaller) chunk of stock that she earned independently.

      • hayeksplosives

        Yeah, I don’t think Melissa added much to the “success” of Microsoft.

        Mrs Bezos however was very important to the success of Amazon, particularly in the early years when it was tough going.

        The only reason Microsoft is huge is that they weaseled in to enough companies early enough that it became a requirement if you wanted to have compatibility with other users. Excel was OK until Gates crapped all over it too.

        I don’t know anyone who actually likes Microsoft. It’s especially galling to have my own computer at home try to make me create a Microsoft account at every turn. No. Fuck off, Microsoft. I

      • UnCivilServant

        My pihole blocklist prevents a lot of connections to microsoft servers because windows 10 is too chatty.

        I shouldn’t have to go to that sort of extreme.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        It’s appalling how much the pihole blocks from Microsoft trying to hoover up tracking data.

  34. hayeksplosives

    Hey, gang.

    I’m late to the party again, but today it was for a (now) new reason: I worked this afternoon! As in WFH, but still on the clock and most importantly charging billable hours!

    I’ve apparently been put in charge of a FRACA (failure report and corrective actions) on a set of hardware from another department. The idea is that having the FRACA run by someone with no particular bias will be helpful to getting to the truth without egos being involved.

    I’ve never been keen on blame-laying and finger-pointing at work. I’d prefer it if I could use language like “Then the technician inadvertently mixed in the wrong solvent…” but there are always big shots demanding “Who?? Who did it?” To which I reply “What are you going to do with that information?” If there isn’t a good reason for singling out the exact person, they usually drop it. An example would be that if the work instruction or labeling is unclear and it could have happened to anyone, there’s no need to name names in the final report. If however, the negligence of an employee is a key finding, it has to go in.

    Whatever. It will be an OK re-entry to working life. And I’ll resume my weekly staff meeting on Wednesday.

    I can’t believe I’ve been gone so long from work. I am not sure how to feel about it.

    I do however know how to feel about the filthy lucre I will be bagging.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Awesome!

  35. Suthenboy

    Earlier I announced I was going to the grocery to buy fruit juice but I had to shower first. Wife said ok, she make a list of a few other things to pick up. When I got out of the shower she showed me the list. Good grief, it was as long as my arm.

    I am back, I am tired and it is my bed time. Good night to all.