Nick Eldridge lives alone in a tiny house on the bank of a trout stream in western Colorado. While he enjoys material success as a nature writer, his memories are drawn back to his senior year of high school, to the girl Ceilidh O’Connor.
It’s been almost 30 years since Nick has last seen or heard from Ceilidh, but not a day’s gone by without her entering his mind.
One day a blizzard strikes, screaming down from Canada. A car has gone in the ditch on the highway a mile from Nick’s house, and out of the howling wind, a distant figure from the past comes to Nick’s door.
***
Friday October 9
The weather forecast had called for snow, and sure enough, it started on Friday afternoon, big fat flakes drifting down out of a gray sky. By nightfall, the wind had picked up, and the snow turned hard and gritty, blasting sideways against my cabin windows. No matter – I had a big stack of firewood, a full LP gas tank, and plenty of food. My cabin isn’t big, just a front room, a tiny kitchen, a tinier bathroom, and a bedroom – but there’s always been just me, so it’s always been big enough. “Bring it on, Mother Nature,” I called into the wind when I went out for an armload of wood.
That’s when I saw the headlights coming down the highway.
Not too many people drive down my stretch of state highway at the best of times, and certainly not during a blizzard. The road always turns icy in these kinds of storms, and sure enough, the headlights wavered as the car skidded – right into the ditch about a quarter mile down the road.
The mountains have a code, just like the sea, so I went inside, got my parka and my big searchlight, and went out to help. My old green Bronco started right up, but I had a heck of a time getting the front hubs locked – they were half-frozen. By the time I got them hammered loose, I looked up to see a parka-clad figure walking up my drive, face turned away from the wind, a small overnight bag clutched in one hand.
I couldn’t see anything other than a parka, a pair of blue jeans, boots, and a expanse of darkness in the hood’s opening. “Come on in – it’s warm inside,” I shouted over the wind. “I was just coming down to see if you were all right. Is there anyone else down there?” The figure’s head shook.
We went inside. I took a moment, stomping snow off my boots, and turned around to greet my unexpected guest. She had her back turned, and was just taking off her parka, letting a cascade of deep brown hair fall out of the hood. She turned and smiled at me, her eyes shining brilliant green in the light.
“Thank you so much,” she said. “I was afraid I’d freeze! I never guessed there was a house out here.”
“I, uh, guess you’d like to use the phone,” I stammered. It couldn’t be – could it?
“Yes, please,” she beamed. I showed her to the phone on my little desk in the front room. She picked up the handset, listened, turned the phone off and on again, and then frowned. “No dial tone.”
“Phone’s kind of iffy way out here,” I told her. “Storm may have taken the lines down. Do you have a cell phone?”
“I tried it when I went in the ditch. No signal.”
“My name’s Nick.”
She didn’t answer. Her back was turned to me, and she was standing very still. When she moved at last, she turned around, holding a framed portrait of a young, green-eyed girl in her hand.
“Nick Eldridge,” she said at last.
“How’ve you been, Ceilidh?”
There were a few streaks of gray in her hair, but the lopsided smile was still the same. “Nick, Nick Eldridge, who’d have ever thought it, after all these years?” She laid the picture down and came over to hug me.
“How long has it been?” she asked. I thought a moment. “Twenty-eight years, four months, and eighteen days,” I answered, and we both laughed.
“You’ve got my senior class picture on your desk? Nick, it’s been almost thirty years!”
“For old time’s sake, I guess. Who wouldn’t keep a picture of their best friend from high school? Please, sit down!” I scrambled to move a stack of magazines off my battered old couch. “Sorry about the mess – I don’t get many visitors out here.” We sat down facing each other.
“So, what do you do out here?” Ceilidh asked, breaking a moment of uncomfortable silence.
“Ever heard of Owen Bradley?”
“The writer? I’ve heard of him, nature and outdoor guides, right?”
“Yes.” I picked up a copy of my latest, Colorado’s Secret Wilds, and tossed it to her. “That’s me. It’s a pen name.”
“Nick, that’s wonderful! You’re famous!”
“Well, not really. Owen Bradley is famous. Good old Nick Eldridge is known around here as some odd old hermit that lives in a cabin on the Uncompaghre. I’ve come a long way from Prairie Ridge, Minnesota.”
“I’m really very happy for you, Nick. Do you ever get back home?”
“Not since Mom passed away. And you? What have you been up to the last twenty-some years?”
“Oh, nothing that exciting. First medical school, then a horrible internship, a worse residency, and now I’ve got a practice in St. Paul.”
“Sounds exciting enough to me. So, it’s Doctor O’Connor now, then?” I knew better, but I had to ask. I could swear Ceilidh blushed before she answered, even though I’d spotted the ring when she took her coat off.
“Well, actually, it’s Doctor Ross,” she said, looking down for a moment.
Why are you looking away from me now, Ceilidh? I thought to myself – at one time I’d known her better than I knew myself. How much could change in almost thirty years?
A lot, I had to admit. Still…
“Anyone I know?”
“Ryan Ross,” she smiled now, looking at me with a faintly defiant air.
“Well, that’s good news!” No, it isn’t. “How is Ryan? Last I knew he was all hot and heavy with, oh, who was it? Beth English, wasn’t it?”
“Back at Prairie Ridge he was, yes. But Beth stayed in PR, and Ryan went off to Iowa, like me, and since we knew each other already, we just took to hanging around together – we were driving home on weekends together, and so on.”
“And the rest is history?” I teased her, but gently.
“Yes,” she answered, “the rest is history. We had our twentieth anniversary last year.”
“Kids?” Please say no. I’m not sure why that thought popped into my head.
“Tom’s seventeen, Ann’s fifteen.”
“And you said your life wasn’t exciting!” I laughed. “Sounds pretty exciting to me! Two teenagers, an M.D., your own practice! So, what brings you out here to the middle of the Uncompaghre anyway?”
“Well, that’s a long story. I was in Durango for a conference – the Third Annual Mountain Medical Conference – and I decided to get away to spend a little time by myself when the whole thing wrapped up. I was actually heading for Vail when this hit.”
“You were taking the scenic route, coming up here through Montrose, weren’t you?”
“Well, sure! I’ve only been to Colorado one other time. It seemed like a good idea until this snowstorm hit. I guess I should have listened to the weather report.”
“First rule of the mountains,” I chided her. “Always know what the weather is supposed to do, especially in the winter. It gets pretty wild out here.” I realized I’d left her an opening.
“So, what are you doing out here, all on your own? Don’t you have a family, Nick?”
“Me?”
“Yes, you!” She reached out to poke me in the chest.
“No, Kaye,” I answered, retreating to an old nickname I’d used for her, way back in high school. “No family. No wife, no kids, no girlfriend. Mom passed away the year I left for college.”
“I remember.”
“Well, that’s it. If you recall, Dad disappeared when I was fifteen. Mom was the only family I had.”
We sat in silence for a few moments, both of us a bit uncomfortable. So many years, so much water under the bridge. Ceilidh had gone so far, and I had gone, well, into myself. I’d retreated into a tiny cabin in the Rockies, making my living writing about rocks, trees, and birds under an assumed name. I was just an anonymous hermit alone on the Uncompaghre.
We talked about Colorado, about the mountains, about Ceilidh’s practice, about my books, until it was quite late. The fire burned down to coals as we sat there, talking oh-so-seriously about things neither of us really wanted to discuss, avoiding the questions we both really wanted to ask.
After some debate, I managed to persuade Ceilidh to sleep in my tiny bedroom, while I made myself comfortable on the couch. “I sleep here lots of nights anyway,” I lied, “It’s closer to my desk, anyway, in case an idea hits me in the night.” The bedroom is only a few feet away from the living room, of course, but Ceilidh was polite enough to leave that unsaid. Without further ado, we said our goodnights, and I lay down to stare at the cabin ceiling until well into the small hours.
My first love, the only girl I’d ever really loved, had just walked back into my life after almost thirty years, thanks to an early Colorado blizzard. But way back then, I’d never been able to tell her how I felt.
What was I going to do now?
It was past three before I finally fell asleep.
Full disclosure: This isn’t my usual kind of story, but I wrote it back in the mid-Nineties and still think it’s one of the best short stories I’ve ever produced. I thought y’all might like it, so here you are.
No Bob Dylan lyrics this time.
Mid 90s, cell phones were not super common yet. Was that in the original story?
I think it was – she was a doctor, so figured she’d have one. I recall we got our first one in 1996.
Cell phones were becoming quite common in Scandinavia in 1995, with Erickson (Sweden) and Nokia (Finland) racing each other for market share. I had a Nokia in Sweden in 1997.
A doctor in Minnesota having a cell phone at that time is reasonable. The phones were finally small enough and with short stubby antennas instead of the long ones from 1990.
Well you could’ve gone with Larry Kirwan lyrics (given her name).
He let her in without wearing a mask or asking about her vaccination status?
And neither one announced their preferred pronouns?
What kind of crazy dystopian story you writing there, Animal?
You’ll just have to hang around for Parts 2 and 3 to find out.
Looking forward to it.
🙂
This isn’t delightful normality?
Oh no.
“Prairie Ridge, Minnesota”
No such place (I know, I know, artistic license).
There IS a Prairie Ride Wildlife Management Area just south of Fergus Falls. That is close to where Pope Jimbo grew up (and look how HE turned out!).
https://www.rt.com/news/543042-new-zealand-covid19-orgy/
So something to do on the first day of snow? Nick has SS-Oberst-Gruppenführer Ardern’s permission at least!
(“Tinder liaisons have reopened” JTFC – a government announcement to let you know you can date again?!?!?)
When I was poking around Tinder, Coffee Meets Bagel, and OKCupid during the lockdown insanity, a significant number of women had on their profiles that they would not meet in person until it was safe to do so.
I passed on all of those women.
You are just trying to help them.
It’s probably still not safe, why would you want to endanger them?
Is it ever *really* safe to meet DEG in person?
Good point, bastard had me waiting for an hour.
Depends on who you are.
I had no issues. But then again, there’s probably no room for more issues.
I made it out alive.
He’s a good guy.
I have, in a very public place.
At the risk of giving him a bad rep, he’s a perfectly lovely person and safe as houses.
DEG is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.
You spelled Fourscore wrong.
I mean, I had a car load of guns with me…
#RangeDay
Ugh… I’ve seen quite a few (well a subset of those very few users who aren’t Chinese FOREX scammers) who require potential mates to be vaccinated as well. Sigh…
Helps you weed out the neurotic ones.
There are non-neurotic people on those services?
Briefly.
There are non-neurotic people
on those services?Nobody needs orgies with more than 25 people when children are starving.
What if it is a charity fundraising orgy?
Not unless you’ve taken plenty of cabergoline.
25 is an odd number.
+1 extra woman.
So, 24 women plus me?
I’m not sure I’m up to the task of disappointing so many women at once.
Ah yes, the important and dignified organs of state which concern themselves with your sexual activities and how you conduct them.
But way back then, I’d never been able to tell her how I felt.
I don’t think time would make that any easier. There is a part of me (the completely insane part) that would welcome such an encounter with a certain lady from my past. Sober me realizes what an awful idea that would be. Looking forward to the next installment.
It seems a little too normal so far.
Or has this place corrupted my brain?
Do I come here because I have a corrupted brain?
Chicken or egg?
It’s a set up. She’s there to steal his kidneys.
Hey?!
She is a doctor.
More than likely you were corrupted before your came to this site. We were all corrupted before coming here.
She died in the wreck.
He died trying to drag her from it.
Heaven or Hell will be determined by these few snowy days in Limbo.
And the bodies were found by the dog that jumped out of the Subaru.
Perfect.
In Part II, she finds his gun collection and a “Hillary Fan Club” membership card falls out of her purse.
Montrose to Vail? taking the short cut over Monarch pass then left at Salida and through Leadville? Crazy but O.K.
Good stuff Animal as always
A somewhat obvious plot device, but what the hell.
She wanted to see the Black Canyon of the Gunnison in winter time.
I like stories with plenty of regret. They seem more realistic somehow.
Thanks, Animal!
Daddy, what does ‘regret’ mean? Well, son, a funny thing about regret is…
This place really is “the
worstbest.”NYC ramps up vaccination efforts
Two people were stabbed with a possible needle during a rap concert at Irving Plaza Sunday night, according to cops and police sources.
Pfizer or Merck?
Anthrax.
They said it was a rap concert, not metal (or hair-band, whichever).
Normally when people get shots at a rap concert the question is ‘what caliber?’
I’ve been to half a dozen merchants today and not a single one asked me to mask or show proof of lienoculation. More reasons to not leave the peninsula. Unfortunately, my second favorite NY bar, Shine’s in Long Beach, have posted that they are vaxxed only until January; they aren’t allowing masks. I’m pissed because their annual bike rally is Saturday night – The Shine’s New York to California Bike Rally* Shine’s opened in 1912 and has never closed, not even when the original Mr. Shine went to Sing-Sing for completely disregarding Prohibition; their capitulation is disappointing.
I haven’t left the house yet. I don’t know the response from locals.
I’m hoping they ignore it, but it’s the capital district, too many government toadies.
Masking in the building where I work seemed to be the same today as it was Friday. The custodian still isn’t wearing a mask.
*New York Avenue to California Street
🙁
It should be cross country.
I was gonna say.
Hey! That’s like 8 bars to stop and drink at.
Today’s elites better hope they’re dead before this generation is in charge.
While riding my bike last weekend in a very wealthy, very liberal suburb I saw a group of kids playing volleyball in their driveway. All were wearing masks. All that was missing was one of those “In this house we believe science is real” signs.
I should get a shirt “Science is a process, not a belief system. Question your hypotheses.”
Thought of another good one.
“I am science.” -Pope Urban VIII
Pope Urban VIII
Truly a legend.
He’s killing it with the Jaguars.
Teachers are dictatorial fascists in the best of times. They think they’re gods because they’re surrounded by 8 year olds all day. I can only imagine the sort of bullshit power trips they’re enjoying when they get to enforce mask mandates.
This X1000.
My wife stopped letting me go to parent teacher conferences after the teacher told me my son doesn’t pay attention and sometimes slept.
In spite of this his test scores were good, and he could always answer her questons.
She seemed offended when I suggested he might be bored. When she replied”It doesn’t matter if he’s bored, he has to comply.” I might have gotten a little angry at the notion his learning wasn’t as important as compliance.
The year after this happened we switched to homeschooling.
I watched the South Park “Post Covid” 1-hour special last night. Of course there is the usual irreverent humor, but some of the points they made are all too close to reality.
Reading the examples you list above, I’d be desperately seeking a way to get my kid out of government schools. I don’t know how this would be possible in families where both parents work or there’s only one parent.
Families have become reliant on schools as day care, but this authoritarian abuse of kids shows the danger of that habit.
I enjoyed them locking down the whole town because one person was unvaccinated.
I am in that boat. It’s a bad place to be.
I loved how that 30 years later, Cartman was a……..oh, Im not going to ruin it.
Will she be working for Pfizer or Merck?
Pa. Acting Health Secretary Alison Beam to resign
whatever company makes SinoVax. She didn’t deliver enough.
Yes.
She’s mad she can’t torture school kids anymore.
If she’s been really terrible, probably a promotion from Biden.
Already been done for the PA healthocracy.
Relevant
Dusty in here…
I had a fish who got away. Well, not really. It’s more complicated than that. Even if it had been more than it was (which wasn’t much), it would have been a disaster.
**WARNING**
Mojeaux’s link is to a Dan Fogelberg song
**WARNING**
Aw, did you have autoplay turned on?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OWwOJlOI1nU
I would have guessed this(after Hype’s warning) if not for the meeting part.
Filling in for Ted’S.
Mojo, don’t do that to me, sad songs like that are too close to home.
Thanks, really
It was the Q-publicans what done it: Biden blames QAnon and Trump for lack of bipartisanship today
Unity/healing/etc. “Everyone that is against me is an extremist.” is a great message. . .
Funny that YT had Winsome Sears queued up following that. That seems like quite the screw-up.
I find that YT runs “Parkland Action” fundraising ads during Forgotten Weapons vids.
I think there’s a little kid caught in Juan’s orbit.
WTF? Apparently only the daughter knows what a salad looks like.
Just got an email from one of my biggest customers. Apparently he got an email suggesting we were involved in a product liability lawsuit.
We aren’t.
I suspect it’s one of our competitors. A ways back they told people we were out of business.
I’m not sure why a multi-billion dollar company would care about us, but there you go. Fucking business world is still junior high.
Are the products in question sold on some kind of commision basis? If so, that’s the answer right there.
You should tell your customers that you heard the other company has herpes.
I said that they were part of a pedo ring.
Juvenile herpes. The worst kind.
Apparently he got an email suggesting we were involved in a product liability lawsuit.
I could see a defamation or tortious interfence lawsuit. Did he forward it to you?
Just the blurb. Trying to get more details.
I really hope people are starting to get the picture.
UK PM Boris Johnson: “There is a tidal wave of Omicron coming…The good news is that our scientists are confident that with a third dose – a booster dose – we can all bring our level of protection back up.”
THIS TIME FOR SURE!
Yes, it is.
Officially approved YouTube vaccine video.
Does anyone else think this is creepy AF?
I think she’s blinking morse code. “Help me.”
I’d like to know how they know it’s safe it women planning to conceive. What it boils down to is have they done trials with pregnant women, and I think the answer is no.
I mean, we assume it’ll be safe. C’mon, man!
Pregnant women are a no-go in the ongoing clinical trial for Pfizer BNT162b2.
https://clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/show/NCT04368728
I should have stated above that the words chosen there were very intentional. It’s a complete bait and switch.
That’s Pfizer’s specialty.
I wonder if that multi-billion dollar fine was just grease for this op.
Because that’s what it looks like.
Now instead of making the unsubstantiated claims themselves and getting in trouble, they’ve got the FDA doing it for them.
You’re the trial, if you’re a pregnant woman.
How could you not PROTECT YOUR BABY?!?
I hate that choice of words. It implies you’re a terrible and irresponsible person unworthy of the sainthood conferred on hyper paranoid moms.
You’re the trial, if you
’re a pregnant womantake the shot.Since Pfizer and the CDC/FDA let them end the actual trials.
Any stats on how many babies have been born Covid positive (and seriously ill) due to thei mother being infected!
Dave Smith said he asked what would happen if his wife tested positive for COVID.
They told him the baby would be placed in a separate ICU to prevent COVID spread.
When he asked if a baby had ever been born with COVID, they basically said no, that has never happened, but we have to be careful.
COVID broke brains.
They told him the baby would be placed in a separate ICU to prevent COVID spread.
That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. If she’s positive, then placing the baby with her means the baby is already in a COVID unit. And, yes, babies in modern L & D departments stay in the same room as the mother, unless they need to be admitted to the NICU. And you don’t get admitted to the NICU unless you are pretty dang sick.
I flat guarantee you they have one (1) NICU (if they have one at all), so there is no possibility of the baby being place in a “separate ICU”. Only a complete idiot would put a sick baby that needed NICU care in an adult ICU; among other problems, it would be a violation of their license. And only a complete idiot would put a healthy baby (even if the baby has a positive COVID test) in a NICU or ICU.
It was a NICU because the baby needed heart surgery immediately.
He also said they wanted her to wear a mask while having the baby, negative test not withstanding and he lost his shit a little, and they didn’t push the issue.
Relevant
(Unfortunately, I can’t find the piece John Stossel did on the subject.)
Oh sweet Jesus….
Fucking lunatics
Well written story, Animal. I look forward to the other installments.
Holy cow – is the public at large finally waking up?
Why Milwaukee Might Sue Hyundai, Kia Over Stolen Car Epidemic
The city’s on track for more than 10,000 stolen cars this year, and roughly two-thirds of those are Hyundais and Kias.
Top comment
I’d say that person needs a gift subscription to Glibs.
They all stick around only until Wednesdays, for some reason?
Because that’s the problem here.
A man who was vaccinated against COVID-19 up to 10 times in one day on behalf of other people has been called “unbelievably selfish” and sparked an investigation.
Astrid Koornneef, group manager of operations for the COVID-19 vaccine and immunization program in New Zealand, said the country’s Ministry of Health was aware of the issue and taking the matter very seriously. …
Vaccinologist and associate professor Helen Petousis-Harris called the behavior “unbelievably selfish” and taking advantage of somebody who needs some money.
It could cause serious harm if the people who are not vaccinated say they are and spread the virus, she said.
Id be more concerned about some idiot taking 10 doses of a vaccine in 1 day.
No kidding. Ten microchips? That’s going to mess up the tracking and mind control, big time.
He’s gonna glow near 5g towers.
Italian man tries to dodge Covid vaccine wearing fake arm
Prolly screw with his neighbor’s garage door opener, too.
https://clip.cafe/national-lampoons-christmas-vacation-1989/id-piss-pants-forget-i-for-about-half-an-hour-so/
Nice.
Relevant AND seasonal.
I saw it so now you have to.
Becuase your sexual orientation is relevant to your students.
I like how it’s considered brave to do something that people clap for.
I guess I might as well come out with it. I, Rebel Scum, am Super Straight.
No one claps for the straight.
I, uh… I…
*cocks 38, puts to temple*
Whose temple?
cocks 38,
I was really confused for a second, I thought you were referencing the second link with some sort of Clerks reference.
Nevermind, carry on.
Not a South Carolina football score?
Every time I see “libsoftiktok”, it’s a hard pass.
Literal mask nazi.
Anybody want to guess how CNBC feels about Dr. Oz?
‘Dr. Oz Show’ cancelled by Sony Pictures as recent New Jersey resident runs for Senate out of Pennsylvania
Carpetbagging bastard.
I heard a few nights ago that he lives in Bryn Athyn, PA and is married to one of the Asplundh Tree Expert heiresses. I have a cousin who was formerly married to an Asplundh woman too. My Granddad and an Uncle also worked for them as accountants. Asplundh is one of the largest privately-owned corps in U.S. so Oz probably has some bucks (and, I’d guess, a pre-nup too). I’ll let you all know if I hear any good Oz gossip.
‘I’ll let you all know if I hear any good Oz gossip.’
I’ve heard The Lollipop Guild allowance gangbangs up to twenty-five Munchkins.
Wait…so they have woodchippers! TO THE BARRICADES!
Now do Slickette.
As an old, white, dude, that isnt a gamer, I will admit this isnt entirely w/o its charm.
Lawn Mowing Simulator Now Out.
Finally. The game that could make me a gamer.
The special edition version should come with a collectable beer cozy.
Just needs a Hank Hill Propane and Propane Accessories expansion pack.
Oh for Pete’s sake.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10304927/Idaho-church-replaces-stained-glass-window-image-black-female-Methodist-bishop.html
Idaho church replaces stained glass window depicting Robert E Lee, George Washington and Abe Lincoln with image of America’s first black female Methodist bishop wearing LGBTQ scarf
How about leaving politics out of the stained glass altogether? Maybe a nice Noah’s Ark scene or Good Samaritan? On the other hand, it would help me to know id never attend services there.
Time for another fucking flood.
With no more than 25 people.
Things I can’t grok: A Christian Church allowing someone who by the book they govern themselves with is technically living in sin to be a bishop.
It makes as much sense as an atheist deciding she’s entitled to be a Christian minister… and the church agreeing
WTF
Dishonesty and inconsistency of principles are to be celebrated now.
She’s mocking them to their faces and they lap it up.
Her sermons might be interesting…
The last few years in a nutshell.
I’d love to see a wider shot of that audience.
I’m going to guess an atheist minister is of limited appeal to the churchgoing public.
“Church becomes even more woke, flummoxed by declining attendance”.
Their appeal is becoming more selective.
Watch. Orthodox Christianity will make a huge comeback.
I look forward to some goode olde fashioned puritan witch trials.
Aren’t the unvaxed the modern version of witches?
My parents and sister have switched to a Congregationalist church explicitly because they are the most progressive church on that side of Houston.
Jesus was a socialist, after all.
*barfs*
Interesting how a sect that was originally far more conservative than the broader Church has turned into the exact opposite.
My first thought was “what the fk do these three men have in common?” All three believed that God was going to require an ocean of bloodletting in order to solve the slavery question.
“And they was right!”
Philadelphia Implementing COVID-19 Vaccination Requirement For Food, Drink Establishments Beginning Jan. 3, 2022
Philly is a lost cause. People gonna get
stabbedshot. In Philly, it’s shot.Restaurants in the Burbs are gonna be happy though.
Nice of the chicomvirus to agree to take off for the holidays and leave us in peace for three weeks when everyone packs indoors for celebrations.
Britain reports first death with Omicron coronavirus variant
I witnessed the headline change from “death from Omicron” to “death with Omicron”. Gonna make a guess since they mention nothing about the individual. He or she was 92 with heart failure, kidney failure or lung cancer. Press loves them some panic porn.
I’m putting my money on: 38 yo hit by a double decker bus?
No, that would be pregnant!
/Tony
So, The Omecron has now killed as many people as Alec Baldwin?
It was died _with_ Omicron, so it has killed as many people as everyone else on the set with Baldwin.
No, fuck off: Anthony Fauci: Americans Will ‘Just Have To Deal’ With Yearly Boosters If Necessary
It would please me if he “just had to deal” with getting fired.
Only if I get to shoot Fauci in the face every year.
Or maybe if he “just had to deal” with yearly denials from a parole board.
I’m sure there is a good explanation for this.
Napoli midfielder Piotr Zielinski (27) was taken off after 19 minutes in Serie A match after struggling to breathe.
I believe that the problem is now so widespread that they’re going to enforce a break every fifteen minutes, and if you fail the cardiac check they’ll remove you from the field but without everyone seeing it.
Curious as to why this seems to be affecting metric footballers and not real football players or basketball players as much.
They all had the AstraZeneca shots?
Constant running and pushing the cardiac system harder
I would assume bicyclists are going to be hit hard as well.
Why not here? I’ve watched a shit ton of hockey and football and haven’t seen this at all.
Is it a different shot in Europe?
It has hit some hockey and tennis players and plenty at the college and high school level.
Soccer players don’t get a rest every couple minutes.
I’ve wondered that myself.
OT- finally watched Slapshot. The scene where he told the goalie his wife was gay was hilarious.
Yeah, that’s a wonderful scene.
That could never be made today.
“I know! I know!”
“Hanrahan!? Hey, Hanrahan!? Your wife’s a dyke!”
A guy on my college ROTC hockey team used to yell that at opposing goalies on occasion to uproarious laughter from some of us.
He was big and tough enough to get away with it. The other team’s goalies would usually laugh anyway.
The best part is that he only knows that because he was sleeping with her.
“I don’t blame you though Suzanne, I mean, well see, women’s bodies are beautiful. But men’s bodies, see I see ’em everywhere you know, in the locker rooms, their cocks all over the place and everything.”
I submit that it is – like The Big Lebowski – a near-perfect movie in almost every respect.
Agreed
Oh this young man has had a very trying rookie season, with the litigation, the notoriety, his subsequent deportation to Canada and that country’s refusal to accept him, well, I guess that’s more than most 21-year-olds can handle.
Also killed by the vaccine
Have I mentioned I hate self-evaluations? Because I hate self-evaluations.
Which may explain why this is 24 days overdue.
I’m uncomfortable tooting my own horn (not like that, you pervs); I bet sociopaths never have this problem.
I give myself straight C’s. I can’t stand that time of the year.
Amusingly, my manager has asked me to pick anything other than ‘Problem Solving’ from the list of competencies (supposed to pick 3-5) , since it’s been an automatic ‘Far Exceeds’ for me for years.
However, he said nothing about ‘Functional/Technical Skills’…
(he’s not trying to hold me back or anything, just wants me to branch out a bit)
The grades drive raises. I never get anything other than C no matter how hard I work, so I am pretty sure what’s really going on is that raises drive grades.
I don’t know if this has already made the links or comment rounds, but I hadn’t seen details like this before.
HOLY SHIT. That CNN producer was…whew. Okay, makes me reconsider my stance on the death penalty.
https://www.foxnews.com/media/cnn-producer-minors-sex-details
And he worked with Cuomo for 5 years. Phew.
Yanno, all of the “the govt, media, and hollywood elites are a giant pedo ring” gets less and less far-fetched every day.
Yes. Meanwhile we are seeing early stages of a push to normalize pesos.
I’m a dollar man myself.
Build the wall!
Isn’t our currency degenerate enough?
When there’s no accountability….
So, other than Two-Scoops riding in on a white horse, has Q been wrong on anything?
*Takes a long pull on a metaphysical cigarette, holds smoke, blows it out like Steve McQueen.*
“Yep.”
all of the “the govt, media, and hollywood elites are a giant pedo ring” gets less and less far-fetched every day.
They certainly provide more than enough confirmation-bias material to keep the conspiracy theories going, that’s for damn sure.
Meanwhile we are seeing early stages of a push to normalize pesos.
I know illegal immigration is completely out of hand, but that seems like a stretch.
LOL on the “normalize pesos” comment.
But think about this, RC – if I had told you in, say, 1991, that in 20 years there would be transgender story hour for kids at public libraries, you would have called me crazy, right? Right??
Well…take a look around at the “trans” movement and the public schools claiming that they can hide what’s going on in schools from parents, or take the incident at the Virginia county school board with the dad who’s daughter got raped, or… etc.
I’d say there’s a LOT more than “confirmation bias” going on. Everywhere I look I see more and more the blatant hypersexualization of kids and it looks to me like trial balloons for normalization. Those slopes actually are pretty fucking slippery from what I’ve seen the last 20 years.
Everywhere I look I see more and more the blatant hypersexualization of kids
No kidding. I think its more “emergent” than “conspiracy”, myself, but that line can be hard to draw.
Its bizarre that its getting any traction alongside the hyper-risk-aversion for children we see everywhere else.
It is where the collision of two separate and highly charged social trends is going to occur.
The cognitive dissonance for the stereotypical “suburban mom” of drag queen story hour and the rest must be truly epic.
The tell will be when the Polanksi case gets dropped.
Did you read that? He somehow convinced at least one mom to fly with her daughter to him, so he could sexually “train” the daughter. How the hell does that happen?
I wondered if some of these “parents” could be foster parents or legal guardians of some kind… but I’m probably just in denial because I don’t want to believe any parent would do that to their own kid.
Of course, I know better from my time as a prosecutor and defense attorney, but it’s been a while, so I’m reverting back to being a normie.
Five bucks says he used the promise of access to Fredo as a lure and incentive.
https://babylonbee.com/news/rudolph-changes-name-to-rolanda-dominates-female-reindeer-games
We’ll done.
Greta on the Shelf
*lights the Ted S. signal*
“Gingerbread House Trampling” LOL.
The ending paragraph was a nice touch too.
From the pictures and the lack of antlers it would at least appear she is in transition.
Female reindeer do have antlers.
(S)he must also be transitioning to a white tailed deer.
She struggled with the final event, Female Reindeer Feminine Ice Dancing, performing far worse than all other female competitors. The judges still awarded her the gold medal for being so stunning and brave.
I’m in an all-day virtual review meeting (from home). Some of the topics are highly relevant to me. Some, not so much. Some of the speakers are also not so dynamic.
Fortunately my “mouse jiggler” came in the mail today so I get to zone out without my skype status going to “idle” or my screen going to sleep.
https://www.amazon.com/Liberty-Mouse-Mover-Blue-Black/dp/B07P6HBD1N/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?keywords=Liberty+Mouse+Mover&qid=1639425857&sr=8-3
I like the disclaimer at the end of the video.
There’s a “jiggle joke” right there and as tempting as it may be….
I’m gonna pass.
Is there a version of that for an optical mouse?
Vibrator & duct tape.
You don’t want them to think you’re having an epileptic seizure.
genuine LOL
I’m using it with an optical mouse now. It is working fine.
The nicest part is that the jiggler just plugs into the 120v wall outlet, and then you put your company-issues mouse on the jiggler. That way the computer doesn’t “see” the jiggler as an unauthorized USB device.
Makes some vibration noise every 10 seconds or so.
I could have used one of these on a system running Labview in which the thing would go idle if the mouse weren’t moved once a minute.
Ordered
For Mac folks, I’ve used this for years:
https://keepingyouawake.app/
perfect for a govt. drone.
Hey now!!!
It’s also good when you have to watch training videos.
*steps away from robodruid before he finds out what a real “government drone” is like*
I’ve been a drone since 1993
Avatar checks out.
Heh, true.
Still, she used to have access to a railgun – just think what she has access to now, what with all the alien tech. Am I not supposed to mention the aliens?
If anyone here had access to a space laser, I think it’d be HE. And she’s not even Jewish.
I am safe:
First they have to certify that all of the people pushing the buttons are up to date on the financial disclosures.
Then acquisition training.
Then green dot training.
No fear.
AFGE 450 training.
safety training.
Alien runway training.
Covid testing
making sure that all of the measuring equipment used on the rail guns have been “calibrated” by the precision labs.
All of the financial records on the parts are up to date and stamped….
No one has use or loose leave.
What? Little ol’ me? ?
???☢️
Thanks Animal. It’s like you’re reading my diary, even got the 30 years right.
Some day, some day, the story can be told but not yet.
Damn. Just got around to reading this. Well done!