Warty Wednesday Hugelinks

by | Mar 23, 2022 | Daily Links | 286 comments

You, if you would get up off your fat ass and go to the gym

 

It’s Wednesday. Are you at the gym? Are you going to the gym? Go to the gym. You should go to the gym. But since you’re not going to go to the gym, here are some links to waste the time you should spend at the gym.

 

Ah shit, never mind, going to the gym is a fascisms.

The intersection of extremism and fitness leans into a shared obsession with the male body, training, masculinity, testosterone, strength and competition. Physical fitness training, especially in combat sports, appeals to the far right for many reasons: fighters are trained to accept significant physical pain, to be “warriors,” and to embrace messaging around solidarity, heroism, and brotherhood.

 

If you are not aware, seed oils are one of the things the government has used to poison the food supply in order to make us weak, fat, diseased, stupid, diabetic, easily sunburned, and gay. If you eat them, you’re NGMI, bro. Vice responds with seething, coping, and racism accusations.

As for Shanahan, her work is often referenced in wellness, paleo and anti-seed oil spaces, with mixed reviews. While a number of wellness bloggers seem to credit her book with shaping their understanding of vegetable oils, critics say her work is at best contradictory and confusing, and at worst, harmful in its promotion of eurocentric beauty standards by tying food consumption to adherence to certain facial structures. The book compares images of face shapes—including white and Black people—in a way that some readers note feels eerily similar to phrenology, a pseudoscience that involved measuring skull shapes that was used to justify slavery and has been compared to eugenics.

 

Eddie Hall and Hafþór Björnsson had a tussle. Remember, kids: winners take drugs and steroids are awesome.

 

Some rage porn for my fellow rageaholics.

“How can we be the cause of it, if no drug activity happens in the store, for 35 years we have never gotten in trouble with the police,” Husien said. “So they don’t want any drug activity, which I don’t blame them, we don’t want no drug activity around here either, but we can’t control that. We can control what’s inside the store, we can’t control what’s outside the store.”

Prosecutor Michael O’Malley said the city and the county need to more often use Cleveland’s nuisance law to address problem businesses across the city.

 

Here is a story which is totally real, is not at all fake, but also very real and extremely not fake.

The infographic released by the Ministry of Defense shows that the official Soviet army losses in Afghanistan amounted to 15,051 personnel, whereas the losses currently suffered by the Russian army in Ukraine amount to around 15,300 personnel, according to the General Staff of the Ukrainian Armed Forces

 

Burn in hell, demon.

Lesley Stahl on U.S. sanctions against Iraq: We have heard that a half million children have died. I mean, that’s more children than died in Hiroshima. And, you know, is the price worth it?

Secretary of State Madeleine Albright: I think this is a very hard choice, but the price–we think the price is worth it.

60 Minutes (5/12/96)

 

Pot doubles down on kettle.

The official US declaration that Moscow has violated the laws of conflict comes after Blinken, President Joe Biden and Deputy Secretary of State Wendy Sherman all said it was their personal opinion that war crimes have taken place.

 

And now for a real man-bites-dog story. I promise I’m not shitting you: a government has broken a promise.

KABUL, Afghanistan (AP) — Afghanistan’s Taliban rulers unexpectedly decided against reopening schools Wednesday to girls above the sixth grade, reneging on a promise and opting to appease their hard-line base at the expense of further alienating the international community.

 

That’s all you get. Go to the gym.

 

About The Author

Warty

Warty

286 Comments

  1. Brochettaward

    Everyday I have this urge to First. Not just to First, but to pull off the world’s most death-defying Firsts. To take risks that no man has ever even fathomed. But at this time, I have to think about more than myself for I carry the seed of a new world. The First That Will Change Everything gestates and grows. It feeds on the reserve energy produced by my restraint.

    • KSuellington

      The First That Will Change Everything is a myth, there’s no such thing.

      • Brochettaward

        THE FIRST THAT WILL CHANGE EVERYTHING IS NOT A MYTH. I’ve seen it. I carry it in my man-womb.

      • Plisade

        “I’ve seen it.”

        Ultrasound?

      • Bobarian LMD

        He always looks before he flushes.

      • Brochettaward

        The wrath of The Great Firster will be felt severely on the day of The Firstening. Repent now.

      • Fourscore

        “Much ado about nothing”

        /Some old guy

      • Zwak,The Baddest Johnny on the Apple Cart

        Man Womb? Is that like a murse, or something? A Mamb?

      • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

        So it’s like Antifa?

      • Tulip

        Great Pumpkin

  2. Count Potato

    “fighters are trained to accept significant physical pain, to be “warriors,” and to embrace messaging around solidarity, heroism, and brotherhood”

    This is bad how?

    • mexican sharpshooter

      I DO NOT FEEL

    • rhywun

      Because it leads to obsession with the male body. And that’s bad.

      • Chafed

        Unless you are a FTM transsexual.

    • The Other Kevin

      Apparently so, which means that whole food pyramid thing was actually on purpose.

    • EvilSheldon

      It’s bad if you’re sick, weak, and intellectually and emotionally feeble.

  3. Rebel Scum

    Are you at the gym?

    Nah, man. That ain’t my style.

    • Swiss Servator

      Go to the gym. You should go to the gym.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Too many people there. I made one at home.

      • Tulip

        I walked the dog.

    • Tres Cool

      HATE LEG DAY!

      • Swiss Servator

        DON’T. SKIP. LEG. DAY.

      • Bobarian LMD

        What’s a leg day?

      • Zwak,The Baddest Johnny on the Apple Cart

        It’s mutton for punishment.

      • UnCivilServant

        Ewe shouldn’t let that stop you

      • Animal

        FUCKING EMBARRASSING! *Kicks a trash can across the room*

    • Tundra

      ” ‘CAUSE IT’S SENIOR-A WHALE-SHIT HOCKEY!”

  4. Tres Cool

    whaddup doh’

    • MikeS

      I’M WORKING!

      • Chafed

        Rufus is proud of you.

  5. Rebel Scum

    Ah shit, never mind, going to the gym is a fascisms.

    Traditional masculinity and being healthy is far-right extremism. Seems legit.

    • Swiss Servator

      I encourage the Left to counter this by being unhealthy, fat, unheroic and feminine.

      • Count Potato

        Then they’ll make you pay for it.

      • Swiss Servator

        I’d just say … “Make me”

        *strikes up classic boxing pose*

      • Rebel Scum

        Call it the ‘Robert Reiner’.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        I was thinking Michael Moore.

      • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

        Don’t they do that already?

    • Drake

      A good meat-head gym is up there with a shooting range for places you are likely to find a room full of liberty-minded people.

      • DEG

        My gym isn’t a meathead gym, but they did ignore the city’s mask ordinance during the second round of masking insanity. During the first round of masking insanity, the gym staff said “Just do what the governor said: Where a mask in the lobby area. We don’t care about what the city’s mask ordinance says.”

      • DEG

        Oh, and after I clicked submit:

        I’ve been to Atillis Gym in Bellmawr, NJ twice. They never closed down.

      • Ted S.

        I’ve felt that one of the reasons the covid panickers kept gyms closed was precisely because of the extent to which meat-heads use them and the left’s hatred of that demographic. Petty vindictiveness.

      • MikeS

        Petty vindictiveness.

        It’s what Progs do best.

      • Fourscore

        Metoo

  6. Tres Cool
    • Chafed

      I was expecting a woman of ample girth.

  7. Count Potato

    “easily sunburned”

    Then wouldn’t seed oils make you more racist?

  8. Rebel Scum

    If you are not aware, seed oils are one of the things the government has used to poison the food supply in order to make us weak, fat, diseased, stupid, diabetic, easily sunburned, and gay.

    Real men use butter anyway.

    • Plisade

      Or lard.

    • Swiss Servator

      Lard. Bacon Grease. Butter. Ghee.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Bacon can be a little controversial in the anti-seed oil circles. (Pigs guzzling seed oil)

      • Swiss Servator

        Carefully monitored pig bacon…

      • db

        That smacks of homeopathic logic

      • Certified Public Asshat

        I think they are right overall about seed oils, but as with a lot of groups, they can be a bit extreme.

      • db

        Right, I think they’d need to prove that the quality of swine flesh produced by seed-oil-fed swine is in some way different or inferior to the alternatives.

        Just saying that feeding seed oil to a complex organism is bad if you want to eat that organism later is not clear logic.

      • R C Dean

        I can’t digest grass, but I can digest beef, so . . . .

      • Bobarian LMD

        Vegan, once removed?

        Only eat things that eat vegetables.

      • Shpip

        Are acorns and other nuts considered seeds? ‘Cuz the best ham in the world is fed a diet of acorns.

      • Tundra

        It’s the Omega-6 levels in swine and poultry (depending, of course, on what they are fed).

      • Certified Public Asshat

        If I remember the argument correctly (?) pigs are the worst because they are fatty and the seed oils are why they are fat. Fat = fat. Something like that.

        *not health advice*

      • Animal

        Ghee whiz!

      • Shpip

        I thought it was butter. Thanks for clarifying.

      • Tres Cool

        Did you hear about the Indian chef that refused to make traditional dishes ?
        He was a naan-conformist.

      • Sensei

        I heard he was nothing butta chicken.

      • db

        That’s what goes on a chicken cheese steak

      • Shpip

        You’re really adding to the tallow there.

      • Animal

        Grease is the word. It’s got groove it’s got meaning. Grease is the time, is the place is the motion. Grease is the way we are feeling.

      • KSuellington

        And duck fat, wonderful duck fat. Something special about duck fat and potatoes.

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        Oh, God, yes. YES.

    • Sean

      Avocado oil.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      easily sunburned

      *laughs in Mexican*

      • Tres Cool

        + Órale

    • rhywun

      I’ve gotta say, tying healthy oils to Bitcoin and “the far right” is… creative.

      Both the first two links are top-notch derp. Well done, Warty for finding these.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Do you even AM links bro?

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      I thought it was my Anglo genetics that made me easily sunburned.

  9. Rebel Scum

    Here is a story which is totally real, is not at all fake, but also very real and extremely not fake.

    Listen, Jack. We have a narrative to perpetuate here.

    • Drake

      (photo credit: Irina Rybakova/Press service of the Ukrainian Ground Forces/Handout via REUTERS)

      the losses currently suffered by the Russian army in Ukraine amount to around 15,300 personnel, according to the General Staff of the Ukrainian Armed Forces

      Adviser to the President’s Office Oleksiy Arestovych said on March 22 that, according to preliminary data, Ukrainian forces had shot down the 100th Russian plane over Mariupol, and two more enemy planes had been shot down over the Dnipropetrovsk region.

      Totally legit sources, I believe everything they say.

  10. DEG

    Are you at the gym?

    That was this morning.

    Ah shit, never mind, going to the gym is a fascisms.

    I read that article earlier. The author can go fuck herself.

    Eddie Hall was beaten in his battle of the strongmen as Thor Bjornsson overcame his rival by dropping him twice en-route to a points victory.

    I watched some of the video, and I thought Eddie Hall was shorter than that.

  11. Shpip

    Albright was a central figure in President Bill Clinton’s administration, first serving as US ambassador to the United Nations before becoming the nation’s top diplomat in his second term. She championed the expansion of NATO….

    Continuing from this morning’s thread, what kind of pushback would Albright have received if she had advocated the dissolution of NATO? I’m guessing that the Pentagon would’ve devoted an entire wing to discrediting and destroying her.

    • Swiss Servator

      The Clintons weren’t exactly big on the DoD. I am fairly certain DoD would have had very little impact on their thought.

  12. Drake

    I’m going to the gym as soon as they send me the data I need for my presentation tomorrow,

  13. Rebel Scum

    Leave the kids alone.

    Moderna said in the coming weeks it would ask regulators in the U.S. and Europe to authorize two small-dose shots for youngsters under 6.. The company also is seeking to have larger-dose shots cleared for older children and teens in the U.S.

    Early results from the study found that tots developed high levels of virus-fighting antibodies from shots containing a quarter of the dose given to adults – although it was less effective against the super-contagious omicron mutant than prior variants.

    “The vaccine provides the same level of protection against COVID in young kids as it does in adults. We think that’s good news,” Dr. Stephen Hoge, Moderna’s president, told The Associated Press.

    So basically none then.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      The Wapo article from this morning said efficacy was “above 0.”

    • Chafed

      This is a bad joke. No children in the control group developed serious Covid. There is no point to this vaccine.

  14. Ted S.

    Lesley Stahl on U.S. sanctions against Iraq: We have heard that a half million children have died.

    Regardless of what you think of the decisions the US took regarding Iraq, that line always seemed like complete bullshit to me. It’s interesting that it got dropped like a hot potato when the Lancet came out with their about as accurate as covid modeling study claiming the 2003 Iraq war killed 500k people in excess of what the “normal” death rate would have been.

    Also, everybody asked where the WMDs were, but nobody ever asked where all the dead bodies of those children were.

    • Swiss Servator

      I think the bad part of all that is that Albright accepted the premise and said “worth it!”

      • db

        Yeah, she didn’t even object to the numbers, went straight to justification.

        One wonders if that means she knew the real numbers were higher.

      • Swiss Servator

        Nobody had any idea. When I was there, nobody said a word about 500K dead kids, we saw no mass graves, etc.

  15. Tres Cool

    I’m doing 24 oz. curls.

    TALL CANS!

  16. The Other Kevin

    I just found this “Zone 2” cardiac thing, so I rode the stationary bike for 45 minutes this morning, then tonight I have hockey practice. Does that count as the gym?

    • Warty

      NO!!!!!!!!

    • Tundra

      Yes.

      And good for you on the Zone 2 training. If you haven’t already discovered him, Phil Maffetone is the man.

      • The Other Kevin

        I’m kind of angry about it. For about a decade it’s been intervals this, Tabata that. And now we’re back to jogging for an hour like people have done forever. But I have done it for a week and already I’m feeling more energetic. I’m hoping it helps me keep up in those A team games.

      • Nephilium

        Mind giving a quick synopsis? Considering I’m mainly on the cardio side already.

      • The Other Kevin

        Here’s what I’m doing, but Tundra might have more details. Maffetone has a formula for calculating your max target heart rate. Mine is around 120. So for 150 minutes per week (I’ve been doing workouts of 30, 30, 45, 45), you exercise keeping your heart rate just lower than the target. I do ski erg and stationary bike. This is supposed to improve your cardio base. The explanation that got me was something like, after 6 months your pace will be much faster while keeping your heart rate at that target.

      • Tundra

        Sure. The vast majority of your training is done at a heart rate that is 180 less your age. It is grueling for beginners because it feels like you aren’t doing anything. But it does really good things for your endurance over time, without the overtraining that is so common amongst endurance athletes.

        You can download his book for free.

      • Nephilium

        Thanks The Other Kevin and Tundra.

        Looks like I’m already hitting that on a regular basis already (within 5 bpm or so in spin classes, going above that on some bike rides). This year, it’s looking like the rides are coming back in a good way again. The first is happening this Saturday, which I won’t be doing. Still too cold and wet to do long rides (Saturday is expected high of 43, low of 27 with a mix of snow and rain).

      • Fourscore

        Hey, I’m getting in shape just by breathing and eating. That’s pretty much all I do. A lot of wet snow yesterday/last night. Gonna be around for few days but I’ll be out for a walk tomorrow.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      “Amen I say unto you, if you do one, you must therefore do both.”

      I’m 90% certain Jesus said that in the book of Matthew.

    • Warty

      At some point I should get a heart rate monitor so I can tell what heart rate zone magic I’m in. I kind of assume that I’m doing enough of that shit between walking and swinging my kookyball and rassling with my fascist MMA buddies, but I have no data.

      On the other hand, cardio is so boring that I don’t know that I would care to do more if I’m supposed to.

      • Tundra

        I walk a minimum of 4 miles every day for my zone 2 cardio. It’s a perfect time for podcasts.

        Weights three times a week and one session of HIIT.

        I like having the HR monitor and a Garmin watch is effortless to use. You should get one.

      • Warty

        I’ll have to get one to get the cheaper health insurance rate, so eventually I will. But I won’t like it, because I don’t like being forced to do things.

      • Nephilium

        Get a bike?

      • Warty

        The roads are death traps for cyclists around here. Blind corners, no shoulders, heroin-addled hillbilly drivers…

      • Nephilium

        You should have some trails in the area, hybrid bikes can handle those quite well. There the issue is sharing it with hikers, joggers, runners, other cyclists, and people walking their dogs on 10 foot leads that are stretched across the trail.

  17. Tundra

    Are you at the gym?

    Just got done. Having the gym in the basement fucking rocks.

  18. Tres Cool

    | Secretary of State Madeleine Albright: I think this is a very hard choice, but the price–we think the price is worth it.

    How would Jeanne Kirkpatrick have worded it ?

  19. Rebel Scum

    I thought we agreed that new currency would be length of table.

    Putin on Wednesday responded to the economic sanctions from the US and the West. Russia will now demand that unfriendly nations pay for their much-needed gas in rubles.

    Europe gets 40% of its gas supply from Russia. Look for gas prices to surge.

    it appears Joe Biden’s mission to kill the US Petrodollar is nearly complete.

    Via Richard Medhurst: This rule applies to all “unfriendly” nations. Russia published a list of 48 “unfriendly” states a few weeks ago which includes the EU, U.S., Japan, Switzerland and Norway. (These are generally countries that have sanctioned Russia in the last weeks).

    • Brochettaward

      Biden really is just the most incompetent president in the last century. And that’s saying something.

      • Chafed

        I didn’t think it was possible to be worse than Bush Jr. or Obama but here we are.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      oops

    • The Last American Hero

      Biden – secret Libertarian President.

  20. db

    Animal, that “Redo Voting” has some major flaws IMO:

    1. Assumes people have camera-equipped, internet-connected devices, or the polling centers will have them
    2. Doesn’t address ballot harvesting or fraudulent registration
    3. Is only “unhackable” insofar as the servers are unhackable, which they will never be.
    4. Assumes secure communications pathways, which may not exist

    • Grummun

      Yeah, my first thought was “that requires reliable network connections at all polling places.” I’ve seen the blue-hairs that staff my rural polling station.

      • Ted S.

        If the entire country had the sort of blue-hairs staffing my local polling station, elections would be much more secure.

        Of course, that would also mean a lot fewer mail-in ballots and little early voting.

    • Dr Mossy Lawn

      It also misses ballot spoiling. and links users to how they voted, and requires central storage, so that state can know and index who voted for what. Confuses hashes with “crypto”. Lots of smoke and mirrors.

  21. Count Potato

    “PICTURED: The doting grandfather trucker whose semi smashed into car carrying six teenage girls and killed them as they performed U-turn on Oklahoma highway

    Six high school students killed in a horrific collision with a semi-truck in rural Oklahoma were riding in a small car with four seats and only two of the teenaged girls were wearing seatbelts, the Oklahoma Highway Patrol said Wednesday. The 2015 Chevy Spark and the semi collided around 12:30 p.m. Tuesday at the intersection of U.S. 377 and Oklahoma 22 in Johnston County. Oklahoma Highway Patrol revealed Wednesday that only the driver, aged 16, and the front-seat passenger of the Chevy Spark were wearing seatbelts at the time of the crash. The semi-truck driver, identified Wednesday by OHP as Valendon Burton, 51, (pictured) was also wearing a seatbelt during the crash. He was not injured. The six girls, all students at Tishomingo Public School, were killed in the crash, including the driver, three 15-year-olds and two 17-year-old passengers. Their names have not yet been released.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10643927/Truck-driver-uninjured-Oklahoma-crash-killed-six-high-school-aged-girls.html

    Damn.

    • Tres Cool

      I only had to read Tractor/Trailer vs. Chevy Spark.

      • Shpip

        There was a particularly nasty collision about ten miles north of my house three years ago. Semi vs van carrying a church group to Disney.

        Local news station got ahold of dashcam footage from a second semi, whose driver was also killed. Not easy to watch when you realize that five kids are in the van, but it certainly demonstrated the physical forces involved. Second video down is more succinct.

    • db

      oh man that sucks

    • Fourscore

      I doubt that seat belts would have helped much. Tragedy and sorrow for the families.

    • Lackadaisical

      “: The doting grandfather trucker whose semi smashed into car carrying six teenage girls and killed them as they performed U-turn on Oklahoma highway”

      Weird way to weird this, sounds like the teenaged driver was in the wrong.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Unless it was a three-way stop, I suspect you correct. Sad for everyone involved. The driver is not going to be sleeping easy at all

      • Ted S.

        If they were in fact doing a U-turn on the highway, I’d think the teens were in the wrong.

        However, I can’t tell from the map and photos what exactly happened. Where are cars going northbound on County Road 22 supposed to go?

    • Ownbestenemy

      Important details…

      “Burton was also a volunteer firefighter and posted recently about the situation in Ukraine, adding that he was praying for a speedy resolution to the conflict”

    • juris imprudent

      Not a U turn, there is a picture of the intersection. It was an acute right from a county road onto a highway. They must’ve pulled out in front of him.

    • Not Adahn

      U-turns are illegal in OK.

      • UnCivilServant

        You have to make a K-Turn?

  22. R C Dean

    Dedthredded this one:

    I was dry practicing with The Last Argument of Dean on Sunday when Mrs. Dean came into the garage and decided if I could run a shotgun, anyone could. She likes the way it handles, and now wants one of her own (it would be a timely anniversary gift, which is nice*).

    I think I just need to have her run a box of 00 shells through it, to see what she thinks of the recoil.

    *Her wedding present was a Sig handgun, so why not?

    • LCDR_Fish

      I thought you both went through the shotgun course at that range a couple months ago?

      • R C Dean

        Nah, just me. She’s done the assault rifle course.

      • Fourscore

        Get her started shooting skeet, recoil light, lots of action and having a good time. Most skeet shooters that I’ve known are way willing to help a newbie on the range. It won’t be long until she won’t even feel the recoil of buck, especially from a Rem 1100. Much is absorbed in the action.

    • Tres Cool

      With 00 or slugs, my 500A kicks enough to get your attention. But its manageable when you expect it and know what you’re sending out the door.
      A whole box tho’ ? Ill have some bruises.

      • R C Dean

        At the 4 day class I took, we ran around 130 00 and over 50 slugs through the shotguns. With the Beretta 1310, it was surprisingly un-punishing – no bruises, just a little tenderness in the shoulder after day 4. Doing rapid-fire drills with 00 did blow up my form on day 4, though.

        The instructors recommended mixing some 00 in with the regular birdshot we mostly were using, for just that reason – birdshot lets you be sloppy with your form, heavier loads expose that.

      • Tres Cool

        One thing most people dont realize (but Archer addressed it) and I love seeing it in movies- just how loud any firearm is when its in a small space. Even a house.

      • Spudalicious

        In a few months, I will have significant firepower guarding the house that will kill the bad guy(s), that won’t kill the neighbors, and that also won’t kill my hearing.

        Much better than a .357 inside with no hearing protection.

      • Count Potato

        Anything is better than a .357 inside with no hearing protection.

      • LCDR_Fish

        Colonial Shooting Academy in Richmond has a 4 hr Defensive Shotgun course – 100 rds buckshot. (Finally got 00 at home now that folks are back in stock – picked up 250 rds from PSA last week) May try that in a month or two.

    • EvilSheldon

      For learning to run a fighting shotgun, https://sym-tac.com/ is the best outfit going.

      • R C Dean

        Upcoming Courses: No events found.

  23. Tundra

    Dr. Cate Shanahan, author of Deep Nutrition: Why Your Genes Need Traditional Food, is among a few key figureheads in the anti-seed oil movement who believe health authorities have long been misleading Americans about the health risks of saturated fats.

    I love Dr. Cate and that book is flat out amazing. However, the butt-hurt author of the article is lying. Lots and lots of people have called out the ‘authorities’ about their absolute bullshit.

    The food pyramid has killed more people than smoking. And the people who want you to use seed oils want you dead.

    • Brochettaward

      I think that’s giving the food pyramid and the bureaucrats who constructed it way too much power. As grossly incompetent as they were, like any government program, it was just a total failure. Most people didn’t follow it to begin with, and simply ate what they would have regardless.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Most people didn’t follow it to begin with

        Not the entire thing, but they definitely ate the bottom of the pyramid (cereal for breakfast, sandwich for lunch, pasta for dinner).

      • Brochettaward

        That’s mistaking cause and effect. The carbs were cheap and available and addictive to humans. We are engineered to want carbs. The food pyramid was just a scheme where businesses bought some doctors and bureaucrats to sign off on the dietary habits people were already developing.

      • Tundra

        Yeah? Remember the low-fat craze where people scarfed down frankenfoods loaded with nasties? Or the whole-grains bullshit?

        Nah, the government and big food were complicit in killing lots of people.

      • Chafed

        What’s wrong with whole grains?

      • Tundra

        11 servings a day?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Whats wrong with having a quarter loaf of bread a day? Especially one that has all the fortifications and enhancers baked in.

      • Fourscore

        4-6 slices? Heavy dark bread (my fave). I rarely eat bread but a sammich now and then is a reward.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        pro: fiber
        con: phytic acid

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Would be interesting to examine their fridges.

  24. Dr. Fronkensteen

    Just read SF’s latest. We need a new trigger warning for this site.

    “Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.” Seems… appropriate.

  25. Mustang

    That first article has motivated me to go the gym today.

    Perhaps they’re going for a reverse psychology thing. They know that being a fat fuck makes one more susceptible to a host of health problems, but they can’t say that and they know a significant portion of the population will do the thing they say not to do, so voila, articles about how being a gym rat makes one an extremist.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    critics say her work is at best contradictory and confusing, and at worst, harmful in its promotion of eurocentric beauty standards by tying food consumption to adherence to certain facial structures.

    Right. One day these morons are going to disappear up their own assholes. That blessed day cannot come soon enough.

    • rhywun

      In that case, I’m going to go drink a gallon of canola oil now. To prove I’m not a racist.

      • Swiss Servator

        Just use it as dipping sauce, with a loaf of Wonder Bread.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        +1 wintergreen nonfat ice milk

      • Count Potato

        How stoned do you to be so that sounds like food?

      • l0b0t

        Ooh… unflavored for me.

  27. Rebel Scum

    A whirlwind of trouble.

    Video shows large tornado ravaging through New Orleans, destroying homes and causing injuries

  28. Count Potato

    “Ukraine Blocks Trans Women Refugees: “They Are Men, Must Go Back & Fight”

    The Ukrainian government is refusing to allow transgender women to leave the country along with the millions of women and children refugees who have been streaming into Poland and other European nations. Instead, Ukrainian border guards are turning them back and forcing them to return home to join the fight.

    Their reasoning might sour some trans activists in the West: Ukraine’s martial law requires all biological males between the ages of 18 and 60 to remain in the country and fight. And it makes no exceptions for trans women…”

    https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/ukraine-blocks-trans-women-refugees-they-are-men-must-go-back-fight

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      Wait til people find out that Ukrainians aren’t woke and are often into fitness.

    • Gustave Lytton

      No outrage that they’re not making women stay and fight?

  29. Pope Jimbo

    I cannot believe Warty isn’t recommending this home health gadget.

    Their prototype mounts to an existing toilet, and uses flush-lever fingerprinting, “analprint recognition” (an incredible phrase, thank you science), and analyzes urine and stool, as well as the speed and timing of your business—all done using two-factor authorization and automatically sent to the cloud.

    Just what I need. More things in my life that require 2-factor authentication.

    • The Other Kevin

      +1 Push notification

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Sorry too many login attempts. Please wait 24 hours.

      • Swiss Servator

        Wouldn’t that be “logging out”?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        ***narrows gaze***

      • pistoffnick the refusnik

        ***narrows sphincter***

      • pistoffnick the refusnik

        GIGO

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      Sent to the cloud. “No honey, I didn’t fart. That’s just the cloud.”

      • Tres Cool

        Can you blame it on the Dog Cloud ?

    • Tres Cool

      I know it’s mid-week, but I will strive to use “analprint recognition” in a sentence with co-workers before Saturday.

    • R.J.

      COMPUTER INDICATES R.J. CONSUMED 1 LITER OF BOURBON AND SOME UNIDENTIFIED FRIED FOODS IN THE PAST 24 HOURS. CONTACTING HEALTH SPECIALIST FOR INTERVENTION.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    That’s just 500,000 Iraqis we won’t have to kill when they’re all grown up. Worth it.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      PS. Although I applaud his sustained effort, illustration guy looks like Bugs Bunny’s wrestling opponent (The Crusher, IIRC).

      • Tres Cool

        One of my favorite BB bits. I think I love you.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Je t’aime aussi! Do you watch the Looney reruns on MeTV?

      • R.J.

        I do. My daughter sees them before school. Much healthier than news.

    • Tundra

      Nope.

      • Fourscore

        Multiplier effect, same as Viet Nam.

    • The Other Kevin

      Yeah but there was another totally true story about Russia bringing mobile crematoriums so there were probably even more!

    • Swiss Servator

      Divide by 2, all claims by anyone.

      • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

        Does that mean we should divide your claim by two too? 2/2 =1. Therefore their claims are accurate. Science.

  31. Pope Jimbo

    Our long national nightmare is over… The CROWN act passed!

    Almost as soon as Black women and men entered corporate America, they were subjected to subtle and not-so-subtle acts of aggression. Some acts were borne out of ignorance and lack of cultural understanding. Others borne out of intolerance and hate.

    One source of such aggressions has been the natural texture of Black people’s hair … what many proud individuals have affectionately called their “crown.” Workplace aggressions based on hair not only cause undue mental stress and harm, they have cost workers income and in some cases locked people out of the corporate workforce entirely.

    Eradicating the worry of discrimination based on hair is a step closer with last Friday’s U.S. House passage of the CROWN Act. The act, which passed 235-189 along party lines, would prohibit discrimination based on an individual’s texture or style of hair. CROWN is an acronym for Creating a Respectful and Open World for Natural Hair.

    • rhywun

      Federal law.

      JFC

      • Ownbestenemy

        I could have sworn laws couldn’t target a specific group or person…but what do I know.

        I am sure Jerry Nadler agrees with me on this after all?

      • R.J.

        Hey. If that means I can have a giant purple pompadour now I am all for it. Does it include anything about comically oversized hats? As part of my culture I wear a foam rubber 30 gallon cowboy hat with a #1 on the side when I am off work. I feel naked at work without it.

    • Count Potato

      Don’t these assholes have something better to do?

  32. Gustave Lytton

    The official US declaration that Moscow has violated the laws of conflict comes after Blinken, President Joe Biden and Deputy Secretary of State Wendy Sherman all said it was their personal opinion that war crimes have taken place.

    The real fun begins the next time the US decides to use kinetic military action in some shithole and we no longer get a pass on bombing a neutral country’s embassy, a hospital, or a civilian wedding party. Eat it up assholes. Better hope those countermeasures on AF1 really work like Boeing and friends claim on the contract closure docs.

    • rhywun

      I am sure there were plenty of “official declarations” against our own war atrocities. But who was going to do anything about it?

      • Fourscore

        High altitude bombing is kind of indiscriminate

      • Gustave Lytton

        Like many things, we’ve been skating for a long time. Now our hubris is escalating to point where we’re still trying to stick our thumb on much more equal powers. That’s a bit different than some ignorable ngo whining about some isolated incident that was totally regrettable but not our fault in Afghanistan or some place.

  33. Pope Jimbo

    Our wonderful “Honest” Ilhan Omar was one of the prime movers of the CROWN act.

    Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN) was one of the bill’s original sponsors. She said the House’s passage was not only for women in today’s workforce, but, more importantly, for her daughters.

    “As a mom of two Black girls, I’m glad to see and co-lead this,” said Omar. “My daughters both have beautiful, natural, curly hair. This (CROWN) is part of our fight to be fully recognized as equal human beings. My youngest daughter, who is 9, when I explained what we were doing with the act, she said ‘thank you.’”

    I’m a little worried that Omar is letting her girls parade around without a hajib like a couple of whores.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Gonna laugh a little inside when someone take a trip through industrial machinery, in the name of equality.

    • Tres Cool

      + Fweedom !

      • rhywun

        LOL my exact thought.

        Completely made-up horseshit. What a grandstanding twit.

    • R C Dean

      That would be the same Ilhan Omar who got the House rules changed so she could hide her hair in a hat, correct?

    • rhywun

      Fighting the injustices of the mid-twentieth century, one triumph at a time!

  34. The Late P Brooks

    The vast majority of your training is done at a heart rate that is 180 less your age.

    Based on my morning up-the-down-escalator climb, that makes me about 43. Ten minutes is all I can stand, before boredom wins and I have to do something else.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Which makes me think we are either going to war or they are just going to say “No more Gas starting today”

      • Sensei

        Yup.

      • Sensei

        Mind you Tesla finally got regulatory approval for its German operations. She likely got wind of when that was going to go through.

      • Fourscore

        How could she? She doesn’t speak German, does she?
        Say it isn’t so, Ms House Speaker

    • Gustave Lytton

      The article is even more infuriating. If there someone more deserving of the Marie Antoinette treatment, I’m at a loss.

    • rhywun

      They’re going to give back all their riches to the state when they die, right?

    • R.J.

      Elon proves himself to be Francisco d’Anconia in 3… 2… 1…

  35. The Late P Brooks

    Russia will now demand that unfriendly nations pay for their much-needed gas in rubles.

    Will those rubles be bought with gold, at an exchange rate set by the Russian central bank?

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      When I was in Russia in the late 90s it was illegal to price things in foreign currency, so instead the bars and restaurants priced things in “units”. It just so happened that the conversion rate of units to dollars was 1 to 1. So maybe they’ll accept payments for oil in units.

      • kinnath

        Menu pricing was set in units. Credit cards were charged in rubles. The exchange rate between units and rubles was updated every day.

        This was intended to deal with the hyperinflation that was occurring at the time.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    semi smashed into car carrying six teenage girls and killed them as they performed U-turn on Oklahoma highway

    Teenage driver doesn’t realize what effect an additional ~500 pounds of passengers has on the performance of her little econobox?

    • Gustave Lytton

      Next up, blowing into your 土法炼钢 to provide all of your metal needs.

  37. Aloysious

    Warty links? Cool.

    I bet they’re all about getting in touch with your feelings.

    *Perambulates through the lynx*

    So close…

  38. DEG

    More on Robert Fojo’s license suspension

    After the ADO issued the temporary suspension and before the Jan 4 hearing, someone at the ADO tipped off the media. Several news articles were published (misrepresented the facts).

    I asked around and attorneys’ licenses get “suspended” all the time. It’s a lot like politicians getting fined by the SEC. It happens often but is rarely publicized.

    In the case of attorneys, disciplinary action is quite common. But can you name any of them? Unless there is some political joy to be had no one covers them. They aren’t considered news. No one inside bothers to notify the media because the media wouldn’t waste the time.

    How about the lawyer daring to say things like look, the rules, and laws as written do not support these mask mandates? How about that guy? Maybe we trump up some charges, get a little overzealous, ignore process and procedure again, and give him a little media perp walk.

    Use him to set an example.

  39. Draw Me Like One of Your Tulpae, Jack

    The Princess cruises Tenement on Keels©️ ship is leaving port, and her horn is “The Love Boat”

    • R.J.

      Nice. Does the crew wear those smart white suits?

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      Mmm. Julie McCoy.

    • R.J.

      I was looking to find the Andy Warhol Love Boat episode when I came across this surreal dance number on Love Boat. You’re welcome!

      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ISJ8ry9vu_0

      • Ted S.

        That better be Ginger Rogers doing “Love Will Keep Us Together”.

        [views link]

        It isn’t? Well, you’re in for a treat:

        Ginger Rogers on the Love Boat

      • Draw Me Like One of Your Tulpae, Jack

        I bet Stubing was an animal in the sack.

      • UnCivilServant

        Are we talking Salmon, which doesn’t engage in intercourse? Or bedbug, which practices Traumatic Insemination?

      • UnCivilServant

        Or it could mean Panda – just not that into it.

  40. The Late P Brooks

    Marshall Plan? It sounds more like the Works progress Administration.

    In a similar vein, Dimon urged Biden on Wednesday to ramp up US natural gas production to strengthen the US and EU’s energy security, the person familiar with the matter told CNN.

    The source said Dimon believes the federal government should focus on four areas: increasing natural gas production in an environmentally responsible way, building additional liquefied natural gas facilities in Europe, investing in new technology for hydrogen and carbon capture resources and streamlining permitting for renewable alternatives like wind and solar.

    Axios first reported the Marshall Plan push from the JPMorgan (AJLXX) CEO, who is one of America’s most influential business leaders.

    Of course, environmentalists and progressives would oppose efforts by the federal government to ramp up production of fossil fuels given the worsening climate crisis. Democrats in Congress have also recently urged the White House to consider banning or limiting the export of both oil and natural gas due to high energy prices at home.

    A top Biden official echoed Dimon’s Marshall Plan characterization in a speech on Wednesday.

    “I think it’s a moment for us to ask at this point in our history, what is going to be our version of the Marshall Plan for clean and secure energy in 2022 and beyond,” Energy Secretary Jennifer Granholm said at an International Energy Agency event in Paris.

    “This clean energy transition could be the peace project of our time,” Granholm said. “But peace always comes after struggle. So let’s give this peace project the focus and the commitment and the resources of a war time effort. Our Marshall Plan.”

    Nationalize the energy sector? Hell, why not internationalize the energy sector. It’s nothing but blue skies, from here on out.

    • R C Dean

      I can’t think of a more blatant example of the government breaking your leg and expecting you to be grateful when they give you crutches.

  41. R C Dean

    appeals to the far right for many reasons: fighters are trained to accept significant physical pain, to be “warriors,” and to embrace messaging around solidarity, heroism, and brotherhood.

    Toughness, fighting spirit, solidarity, heroism and brotherhood are virtues associated with the far right? Sure you want to go with that?

  42. trshmnstr the terrible

    Hey all, I’m collecting can lids for SP.

    1) Take a lid, rusty or not (preferably a canning lid, but whatever you can get), write your glibs handle on it along with a message of appreciation for her immense contributions to this site. NOTE: you may get better results using a fineliner permanent marker.

    2) email me at trashy-glibs [at] disengage [dot] co (and let me know what your glibs handle is) to get the destination address for the lid.

    3) shove the lid in an envelope and get it in the mail by April 1st.

    Once I get all the lids, I’ll assemble them in a way that only a trash monster can, and I’ll send it up to SP to replenish her stock and keep OMWC in check.

    I’ll continue posting this in the links threads this week.

    NOTE: Athena has graciously offered to put messages on lids for those who, for whatever reason, can’t. (athenaofprogtown at the gmail)

    NOTE2: If you don’t hear from me within 24 hours, let me know

  43. Tulip

    Trashy I haven’t had a response from you re: can lids.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      Do you mind resending? Same thing happened to db (I had no record of the message) , and it showed up fine the second time.

      I used to talk up Abine Blur, but not anymore! This has been a massive failure on their part, right when their product was most necessary.

      • Tulip

        Resent

  44. The Late P Brooks

    Always be bitching

    Tesla Inc. is facing opposition from community and environmental groups over its plan to hold a party for 15,000 people to celebrate the opening of its plant in Austin.

    The company intends to offer tours of the 8 million-square-foot facility, food and two stages with live music at the invite-only event on April 7, according to plans submitted to Travis County, which encompasses Austin. Officials on Tuesday granted approval after hearing testimony from concerned neighbors.

    Paul DiFiore, a representative of the Colorado River Conservancy and the Austin-based environmental-justice group PODER, cited noise, blocked roads, dust from construction and water pollution as issues.

    “This grand opening is not a substitute for real community engagement,” DiFiore said. “I urge you to consider rejecting this permit and forcing Tesla to delay their celebration until they start treating the community in Eastern Travis County as more than a workforce for Elon Musk but rather as neighbors and partners.”

    Boo fucking hoo, you parasite.

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      Translation: Please make a generous donation to our organization, Mr. Musk.

    • juris imprudent

      PODER (People Organized in Defense of Earth and Her Resources) is a women led, people of color grassroots social justice organization

      Paul DiFiore

      One thing here is not like the other.

      • rhywun

        Geez, grifting sure does attract a lot of insufferable party-poopers.

      • R.J.

        Oh my God yes.

      • one true athena

        That page is a bad joke. the founder is “an indigenous person of the continent of America.” Yeah, sure, honey.

        And for a Woman/POC-centric org they sure have a lot of white dudes. lol

      • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

        I was born here too. Doesn’t that make me indigenous?

      • Shpip

        Susana Almanza is a founding member and Director of PODER. Susana is an indigenous person of the continent of America and resides in East Austin, Texas.

        I was born in Tampa, which (last I checked) is part of North America. Does that make me indigenous too?

    • juris imprudent

      She might be, but I think Mahomes might be a bit pissed off.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Did he break her arm too?

  45. Count Potato

    “I’m the only one masking in many situations. Can you all wear one too not just to protect me from the virus but also Asian hate?”

    https://twitter.com/risahoshinoMD/status/1506439725422424064

    Her entire feed is both stunning and brave in fighting the stereotypes that doctors and asians are intelligent.

    • Tundra

      “No. Fuck off.”

    • rhywun

      Way to live up to the stereotype, hon. I don’t think I’ve seen an Asian face in two years and I wouldn’t be surprised if I never saw one again.

    • EvilSheldon

      What part of, “I hate you and I want you to die,” are you not understanding here?

    • Animal

      *Facepalm*

    • rhywun

      It’s like a perpetual money machine.

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      “he’s a teenager who accidentally ended up in a tornado (as opposed to the storm chasers who do it on purpose). We wouldn’t be shocked if he was still under the covers in his room in Manor, Texas, laying a thousand-yard-stare on the wall, instead of trying to give interviews about the experience.”

      Please. He’s probably trying to use his story to pick up chicks right now.

    • Tundra

      Love that! MB was a genius.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        We need more like him.

    • Gender Traitor

      Wasn’t expecting that.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Turns out they just want high gas prices so they can pretend to save you from them.

    • rhywun

      “Putin Price Hike”

      It’s like they’re not even trying any more when it comes to fanciful excuses to buy votes.

  46. Tundra

    Out of curiosity, what’s the story on the bodybuilder in the pics? Very common meme material, but who the hell is he?

    • rhywun

      Google Image search tells me he is “GigaChad”, may or may not be real, may or may not be dead, is “impossibly beautiful” or “alpha” or some shit, and little else.

      • Tundra

        He doesn’t look real. But thanks for enacting my labor.

        Here.

        Oh, and here’s more:Is GigaChad a real person?

        Fake.

    • R.J.

      What the Hell was that?
      I must resist the urge to click on those twatter links.
      I have important business to attend to – I must watch ‘Bigfoot’s Wild Weekend.’

      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oSk420TIpjs

      • Tundra

        Lol!

        Is that tomorrow’s offering?

      • R.J.

        I am going to make it an April movie. It started strong with some hillbilly boobs, and then I had to get back to work. If this stays strong it is totally getting reviewed.

    • mikey

      I really hate presidents saluting – the whole effing point of the job is that they aren’t in the military.

      • Tundra

        I really hate presidents saluting

  47. Homple

    The guy in the picture looks like a lumberjack. Is he OK?