A Libertarian Case for Unions

by | Jun 8, 2022 | Libertarianism, Musings | 178 comments

Senator Jim Bunning, union leader

 

In a recent comment thread, someone asked for a libertarian case for unions.  Very quickly, a few people pointed out that it was a freedom of association issue, which is the correct answer.

Okay, article is done.  Time to comment off-topic.

This article is actually mistitled, as that was too easy.  What I am instead going to discuss is what I would think a good union would look like in a much more libertarian society.  To get to the place I am reaching would require the removal of lots of laws and regulations.  I have discussed some of these ideas on other sites, and it has been pointed out that I have basically reinvented the medieval guild.  The problem with the guild system, IMO, is that they got the government involved, creating monopoly situations.  My idea doesn’t make that mistake.

Where do we start?  My idea is that I want to create a union that workers want to join and that the business owners want to deal with.  First, I want to discuss the benefits that the union would provide that would encourage joining it.  The union should provide health care, unemployment benefits, retirement benefits, disability insurance, job training, and the like.  That whole package of extra benefits that employers provide now.

A decent size union in a decent size town would have a free clinic for basic health care for members and their families.  GP, dentist, optometrist would all be union staff positions.  They may or may not have a network of specialists, but those would be covered by an insurance policy.  As a union member, your insurance wouldn’t go away if a job went away, it would be tied to union membership, not to employment status.

Employers would love not having to provide all of that, can cut back on HR departments, they would be competing on wages, not on some hard to measure package of wages and benefits.  Would employers want to hire union members vs unaffiliated?  Maybe, especially if most of the talent was a member of the union.  Especially if it made hiring easier…”I need a senior python programmer, send me 10 resumes please.”  The union of coders, dbas, and tap dancers would quickly provide available talent.

Could something like this really develop if allowed?  Look at the MLBPA.  I have problems with it (like the fact that they are the MAJOR league baseball players association and refuse to cover minor leaguers), but it isn’t far off of the ideal.  While the baseball owners would be willing to hire outside the union (and have hired scabs in the past), no one refused to join the union.  It’s benefits are so huge to the player, that there is no reason not to join.  The only non-members have been players who have crossed the picket line in the past and been banned from union membership.  To be fair that is an odd situation due to the amount of money involved, but in a more libertarian society the same kind of organization could from for other workers.

Am I wrong?  Am I missing something?  Probably yes on both, so feel free to attack in the comments.

Also, if you made it this far, you get a music link.

About The Author

robc

robc

I like beer.

178 Comments

  1. Tundra

    To get to the place I am reaching would require the removal of lots of laws and regulations.

    I see a slight problem.

    • Kwihn T. Senshel

      No problems here; where do we start?!

    • juris imprudent

      Look, the cow CAN BE spherical.

      • UnCivilServant

        Can I get you to invest in our cow sphericizer?

    • Chafed

      It’s a think piece. Cut him some slack.

  2. Mojeaux

    someone asked for a libertarian case for unions

    *raises hand* Was me.

  3. Sensei

    A decent size union in a decent size town would have a free clinic for basic health care for members and their families. GP, dentist, optometrist would all be union staff positions. They may or may not have a network of specialists, but those would be covered by an insurance policy. As a union member, your insurance wouldn’t go away if a job went away, it would be tied to union membership, not to employment status.

    Question is if such a thing runs afoul of Obamacare. I’d imagine you could construct it so the employer pays the union who pays the providers. But it is going to have to meet all the BS of the law.

    • UnCivilServant

      To be fair (which I often am not to robc) he did say that his proposal required removal of a lot of laws and regulations.

      • robc

        ^this

  4. Scruffy Nerfherder

    I have no issue with private labor unions in a deregulated environment. Public employee unions are abominations.

    • Kwihn T. Senshel

      ^this.

      The two sides of Public unions get to “negotiate” with one another, secure in the knowledge that a third party (the taxpayer) gets to actually, you know, PAY FOR IT.

      They’re right up there with the other unelected, non-legislative penaltaxing shenanigans in my book.

    • rhywun

      abominations

      A.K.A. money-laundering operations for a major political party

  5. Don escaped Texas

    Same as an HOA: people should be free to associate, free in general, and free to make mistakes.

    I’m okay with unions. I’m okay with firms ignoring them. I’m okay with strikes. I’m okay with the firm firing whomever without cause. So long as a free market in labor is at play, I don’t care who uses which tactics on which sides….it will settle where it needs to settle.

    I was a Teamster for three years when I was a kid: I needed the insurance for FirstWife; I didn’t get the tattoo, but I cashed checks all out of proportion to what I could have commanded as an individual. And that’s the stamp: union membership announces to the world that the individual can’t stand on their own two feet.

    Conversely, my HVAC guy, maid, and cobbler would never consider a union: they don’t want to be average, to be watered down, to subsidize others, or to live under deals they didn’t directly negotiate for themselves. They do well, and people all over town fight for their skills.

    I also don’t care about public unions. The problem is that cities don’t negotiate from strength and that the public overestimates the necessity or even utility of the PD and FD. Fuck em: go on strike for all I care: I’ve got a mag full of freedom, one in the pipe, and property insurance….see ya in the funny papers.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      Same as an HOA: people should be free to associate, free in general, and free to make mistakes.

      As with many things, it’s not the HOA that’s the problem. It’s the overprevalent HOA mandated by many cities before begins thats the problem. Government fucks up everything it touches.

      • rhywun

        The riff-raff isn’t going to keep itself out.

    • R C Dean

      “I’m okay with firms ignoring them. . . . I’m okay with the firm firing whomever without cause. So long as a free market in labor is at play”

      So you’re not OK with unions as they presently exist?

      • Chafed

        That’s how I read it m

  6. Kwihn T. Senshel

    Robc –

    Thanks for the article, good thoughts.

    You say:

    The union should provide health care, unemployment benefits,… [etc]

    This would necessarily and significantly drive up the costs the union bears, so who would cover that cost? If the members, then I could see a threshold where benefits are outweighed by costs pretty quickly (esp. once you start adding administrative overhead and the like).

    How would the setup work to keep things attractive and competitive for members?

    • R.J.

      In a perfect world with no regulations, it is just a matter of appropriate risk management. What makes costs skyrocket (most of the time) is regulation. Anyone else have comments? Don’t leave the hammered movie guy to answer.

    • R.J.

      In a perfect world with no regulations, it is just a matter of appropriate risk management. What makes costs skyrocket (most of the time) is regulation. Anyone else have comments? Don’t leave the hammered movie guy to answer.

      • R.J.

        OMG the clone comments are back. I blame bourbon.

      • whahappan

        My BIL belongs to an Operators union (heavy equipment operators). They provide everything mentioned, except the free clinic, doctors, etc. If it can be done in this heavily regulated environment, I don’t see why it wouldn’t be easily possible in a much less regulated market. Also, since we’re dreaming, medical care would presumably be much less regulated, and therefor much cheaper and accessible, negating the need for union run medical care.

      • R.J.

        Absolutely. And costs would be more transparent. It’s hard to figure out where the expense is coming from when you are trying to comply with 200+ laws.

  7. Zwak, who counted all his blessings, and counted only one.

    Having both been in a union (CWA 9415) and been management over represented employee’s (Teamsters local 150) I will say that they can been good or bad, depending on the union. Workers do need people on their side, especially in a large corporation, as there is a tendency to… overlook, shall we say, many laws. And those laws were the reason unions came into existence in the first place. And when the two work together to get issues taken care of, such as overtime pay, work environment issues, and so on, it is really good. On the other hand, a shitty union is no help to either the employee’s nor management. It may be ridiculously easy to manage unionized employees (seriously, anything comes up you just point to the contract and remind them that your hands are tied) but trying to implement work slowdowns, organizing call outs to come in the middle of the night, tends to make management look for… creative ways to implement the contract. i.e. if you get to reclassify everyone on an equal level, then reassigning a recalcitrant worker to the shittiest job is quite easy. And any good union contract will have a business needs clause.

    Also, the union better make good on it’s end of the bargain. There was a reason that local of the teamsters voted to decert at my location one year after being voted in.

    • Gustave Lytton

      seriously, anything comes up you just point to the contract and remind them that your hands are tied, and tell them to talk to their unionist if they don’t like it

  8. Semi-Spartan Dad

    I have discussed some of these ideas on other sites, and it has been pointed out that I have basically reinvented the medieval guild. The problem with the guild system, IMO, is that they got the government involved, creating monopoly situations.

    My wife just had to pay her guild annual dues to continue practicing. Private national organization backed by the government with the force of law. All members of her profession must be members. It’s a damn shakedown. No different than when Tony’s boys go door to door for extortion from shopkeepers. At least the shopkeepers get actual protection if mostly peaceful protestors show up.

    • Don escaped Texas

      go rogue!

      I’ve violated licensure laws in 17 states, seven countries, and counting

      • R.J.

        Well done!

      • DEG

        Excellent.

    • Brochettaward

      Where is everyone? Out there fucking around and seconding. Not Firsting, that’s for damn sure.

  9. TARDis

    so feel free to attack in the comments

    Okay, fine. Where is the clause that provides cocaine/strippers/asses on a weekly basis in the latest contract? WTF are you stooges good for?

    • Chafed

      Finally, a union I can support.

  10. Q Continuum

    I have no problem with private unions. If you can leverage your skills and market value collectively to voluntarily negotiate better salaries, benefits, etc. then more power to you. It’s public sector unions that are evil.

    • The Bearded Hobbit

      This.

      1) Workers have every right to negotiate, either individually or collectively. Not evil

      2) Public sector unions. Evil.

      1a) Government involvement with private unions raises the Evil level.

      Nice article, thanks.

      • R.J.

        YEAH! What he said! Thinking is optional tonight for me.
        Also, how are you? There was a lot going on last time I saw you in comments.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Cancer surgery scheduled for next Wednesday.

        Thanks for your thoughts!

        I lurk often but usually just read dead threads. Seldom do I get a chance to comment on something current.

      • straffinrun

        Wishing the best for ya, Hobbit.

      • DEG

        I hope the surgery goes well.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Reply to my own comment:

        Most of my career was spent at LANL where all union interaction was 1a). In Libertopia the unions would be providing the best workers because they would be paying the top dollar in the field. My experience was that the unions provided a shelter for shoddy work. If you couldn’t be punished then why GAS about the job. My buddy who is still working there passed on a story about an entire switchboard that was wired CAB (supposed to be ABC). The guys in the field chased problems for weeks before proving that the union workers had screwed up

  11. kinnath

    My uncle was a union electrician, but in a specialized field. He wired up power plants as they were being built. Basically on the job for three years and then move to the next plant.

    His union operated in a way quite similar to what is described here and provided most of the benefits and employee would get from an employer.

    • Gustave Lytton

      I was going to mention that. Quite a number of unions provide benefits, and a number have a history of corruption associated with those funds.

      Moving benefits from the employer to a union isn’t really much of a disassociation from employment tied benefits. If you leave the union represented position or field, those benefits don’t follow, just like traditional employment benefits. There’s the same lock in, for better or worse, to incentivize employees from leaving for newer pastures. Nor does it necessarily provide any greater security. For trades or a region where there are multiple employers in the same industry, it might but in a factory town or an industry in decline, job goes away, there isn’t another similar job represented by the same union to pick up.

      • kinnath

        I never talked to him about it, but my guess is that he was a contract employee with no benefits from the employer. The union filled in that gap.

  12. Grumbletarian

    Steph Curry, the hottest shooter on the fucking planet, is on the floor with four fouls on him and the Celtics don’t seem to have any interest in making him play defense and risk getting a fifth foul. So Curry has got roughly seven thousand fucking points in the fucking quarter as a result.

    • straffinrun

      There it is. If Jalen Brown shows up, Celtics win.

  13. kinnath

    Honey harvest is officially on the calendar.

    Just made reservations for the hotel.

    Look forward to seeing everyone again this year.

    • Fourscore

      Great news, Kinnath! Open season now. We’ll try to get a photographer that won’t cut off half of Jimbo. Check with Kinnath for a nice place to stay.

      I worked at a union place. Strikes and seniority. Driller was the dirtiest job and no one was interested in bumping me so for a newbie I had one of the higher paying jobs. I didn’t ever worked a union job after that.

      • kinnath

        Grand View Lodge again.

        Spending the big bucks to treat the wife well. 😉

      • Fourscore

        I’m in awe of a guy that makes superior mead and in his spare time puts together musical instruments. Good article, K.

  14. straffinrun

    “ The union should provide health care, unemployment benefits, retirement benefits, disability insurance, job training, and the like.”

    Why healthcare? If we’re in a libertarian society, I can get my dentistry done at the convenience store.

    • kinnath

      Why not. Groups can typically negotiate better deals than an individual. You can still buy your dentistry at the corner store, but the union might get you a better deal.

      • straffinrun

        If it’s a free market, the entire consumer base provides a check on prices. You may be able to get a better deal by having the union negotiate your healthcare, but you’re also creating potential problems by having so much of your life in the union’s hands.

      • kinnath

        There are no solutions; only trade-offs.

        Some people want to be in charge of every aspect of their lives (count me in), and some people want to let others take care of them. There is a place in the world for cooperative negotiations. All of our problems today are because the government sticks its fucking nose in everything and tips the scales to favor some chosen group.

      • straffinrun

        Agreed on that.

    • straffinrun

      Just to be clear, I may be an anarchist, but I hate all kinds of bureaucratic behemoths whether they be govt or private. Negotiate my salary, but other than that, no thanks.

    • Cannoli

      In this hypothetical de-regulated scenario, I wouldn’t want to do any of these things through a guild/union, except maybe job training. Whatever insurance I’d want (disability, catastrophic healthcare, etc) I’d pay for directly, a third party getting in the middle is likely to just add costs. Other than that, I’d pay for my own routine healthcare, manage my own retirement savings, keep an emergency fund in case of unemployment, and so on. I’ve got no objections to the existence of the private union, I just don’t think it would have a good cost-benefit ratio.

    • Chafed

      Congratulations GL. This seems unrelated to your work unless I missed something. Did you get it for kicks?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Thank you! Half for kicks and half just to have as part of a fallback plan if needed. This state is anal that running cat5 for networking is an “electrical installation”. And my now retired former boss would sign off the hours requirement so I didn’t have to do a formal apprenticeship. Plus, I actually did learn a little bit studying for the test.

      • Chafed

        ?

    • DEG

      Congratulations!

      My eyes glazed over halfway through that document.

  15. grrizzly

    Back in the US. It’s convenient to have a partner (and a travel companion) who has the same sex and race… as long as a negative test is required to fly to the US.

    • slumbrew

      Handy, that.

      It will be a huge pain in the ass if we pop positive in Saint Martin.

      • Chafed

        ??

    • Chafed

      First you double your wardrobe and now this. I swear you guys get all the breaks.

  16. MikeS

    DAILY QUORDLE ROUNDUP™©®
    (The ‘This is time consuming’ Edition)
    #135

    Champ
    Sean 17

    Not Adahn 18
    rhywun 18
    QuordleBot 19
    The Hyperbole 19
    grrizzly 21
    Grumbletarian 21
    kinnath 21
    Ozymandias 21
    Scruffy Nerfherder 21
    Ted S. 21
    Tulip 21
    Grosspatzer 22
    MikeS 22
    TARDis 22
    trshmnstr the terrible 22
    Tundra 22
    SDF-7 23
    whiz 24
    JG43 25
    l0b0t 25
    one true athena 25
    Cannoli 26
    pistoffnick 27
    Ownbestenemy 28

    Chump
    Mojeaux 118
    robc 120

    Grosspatzer is the new Quordle King! A brand new tourney to try and take him out starts tomorrow. Think you’re good enough to beat him? We shall see…

    Sean is kicking ass this week. By my very quick skim, it looks like he’s gotten at least a share of the daily championship 3 out of the last 5 days.

    27 players today with an average score of 29.2. Tundra Line split was 17/10. Not terrible, but Hype’ would probably be chewing asses right now. IFYKWIM Quordlemetrics: 0 2 3 6 (2)

    How, how, how, how!

    • Sean

      I’ve been practicing my wax on/wax off skills.

  17. Brochettaward

    So, in the last day or two we have lefties firebombing a pro-life center and conspiring to assassinate a Supreme court justice.

    I’m going to guess those stories didn’t get much time on cnn.

    • Kwihn T. Senshel

      What else do you expect them to do, held down by white Supremacy like that?

    • Kwihn T. Senshel

      What else do you expect them to do, held down by white Supremacy like that?

    • slumbrew

      Just righteous anger

    • Chafed

      Clearly the FCC should yank CNN and MSNBC’s licenses.

    • one true athena

      Didn’t watch CNN myself (puke), but there was one link to a segment where the host/ess tried to claim there was no weapon and this was a ‘both sides’ problem, so they’re definitely on top of it!

      • Chafed

        No weapon!?! That’s some fine reporting Lou.

  18. Ozymandias

    robc – what you’re imagining is what groups like the knights of Columbus and other “fraternal” organizations/mutual aid societies did back in the day.
    It’s how healthcare was delivered prior to the AMA and other fuckery around delivery of medical services.
    Back in the day, groups could band together and pay a fixed fee from their membership to have a doctor on ‘retainer’.’ The doctor would treat the members in big “fair” kind of events, but also travel and make house calls- it was covered by the group’s fees. It gave both the doctor and the groups some certainty in cost/income.
    Of course that also predated everyone turning into lardasses with all of the associated disease states, but that was largely done on the back of other public health interventions like the food pyramid and the “dietary fat is bad” bullshit.

    • Chafed

      I’m starting to think you don’t trust our beneficent government.

      • Sean

        You misspelled maleficent.

    • DEG

      what you’re imagining is what groups like the knights of Columbus and other “fraternal” organizations/mutual aid societies did back in the day.

      I see Ozy beat me to it.

    • Sean

      You forgot “*paging Tres*”

    • Tres Cool

      Do people even attend WNBA games?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I’d guess the attendance is 80 percent manly lesbians but yes.

      • Tres Cool

        “thats some nappy-headed ho’s” -Don Imus

    • rhywun

      Apparently, the police need to up their mind-reading abilities.

  19. Sean

    Morning peeps.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Mornin! And hooray for Evan.

    • DEG

      Someone has to pay to fix those bridges. I think PA’s extremely high gas tax should cover it.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      They want one of them to be offed, or at least want to intimidate them and don’t care if one of them is offed in the process, that much is clear. A small price to pay as far as they’re concerned for unfettered, federally protected abortion.

      • DEG

        Yes

  20. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody

    • Tres Cool

      Oh- Welcome Home Evan!

      • Tres Cool

        + Chuck D

    • Sean

      Nope.
      Nope.
      Nope.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I can only imagine it’ll be like the gas pumps with the screens that blast crap at you while you pump except in the middle of your kitchen.

      • Tres Cool

        I could save a lot of money by duct taping my iPad to the fridge I suppose.

  21. DEG

    Am I wrong? Am I missing something? Probably yes on both, so feel free to attack in the comments.

    I agree with you, so therefore you must be right.

    😉

    On a serious note, this is basically how I think unions would have evolved had the government not gotten involved. Though I was thinking of mutual aid societies and not baseball.

    I had to go into the office last night. Company meeting and company dinner. It went later than I thought it would, though the dinner was good. At least I didn’t get stuck in traffic.

  22. Tres Cool

    Since Ive been off work this week, I slept all night like you “normies”. Evidently I missed some exciting weather.
    Jugsy did wake me up once to say, “uhhh….tornado sirens are going off’. I think I said “thats nice” and went back to sleep.

    • Lackadaisical

      Everyone is such a pussy these days. Real men aren’t afraid of tornados.

    • Gender Traitor

      Yeah, for just a few minutes there I thought we were going to have to get the cats and ourselves down to the basement. (Luckily, they usually follow us down there every time we go.) I trust you’ve seen the drone footage from the latest supply chain disruption? I guess burning down food processing plants wasn’t working well enough.

      • Tres Cool

        Well, in the midst of our ‘food desert’ (according to many of our local community leaders), we only have Kroger, Aldi, and Walmart in the short term.

      • Gender Traitor

        We even have a FOOD CO-OP, bitchezzz!!! Suck it, San Francisco – Dayton has ARRIVED!

      • rhywun

        I’m so sorry.

      • Tres Cool

        I have yet to set foot in that place. Still have flashbacks to visiting th co-op in Park Slope when I was dating NYC lady.
        “how did you cram so many hippies in 1 small building?”

      • Gender Traitor

        I’ve been to the food co-op in Yellow Springs, but it’s been a looooong time. (I don’t even know if it’s still there.) Friend of mine used to make some yummy kamut grain chili, and that was her best source.

      • l0b0t

        I HATE the Park Slope Co-Op. At a previous job, a cow-orker was always trying to get me to join. “Wait, I have to pay a fee AND work a minimum number of hours in their store every month. Just to get groceries that are significantly more expensive than the neighborhood Stop & Shop, Key Foods, Pathmark, Gristedes, Western Beef, Whole Foods, or dozens of bodegas?” “Are you people nuts?”
        I will say, a few years ago when slightly more than 50% of those who got to make such decisions decided to divest and stop carrying any product made in Israel, the public fighting was delicious.

      • rhywun

        lol and yeah I remember the system kind of breaking down when too many of the members were too lazy to do their hours and other various episode of backstabbing.

  23. Tulip

    Oof,

    Daily Quordle 136
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    • The Hyperbole

      6️⃣7️⃣
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      It’s a good thing I have a bye in the first round.

    • Not Adahn

      Daily Quordle 136
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      This one had way too many guesses gain zero or one letter.

    • rhywun

      Hail Mary FTW

      Daily Quordle 136
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    • Sean

      Daily Quordle 136
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      Meh.

    • Cannoli

      Daily Quordle 136
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  24. DEG

    I’m off to the gym.

    Mornin’ all!

  25. Lackadaisical

    Morning tulip and the rest of the am crew.

  26. Yusef drives a Kia

    Howdy everybody! What’s happening in Glibertopia?
    /Covfefe

    • Tres Cool

      TALL CANS!

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, Yu, homey, Lack, DEG, Tulip, Sean, & Stinky!

      For once, someone else’s Dragons game got rained out last night, so if I can duck out of the office a little early this afternoon, we can catch TWO 7-inning games this evening! (Supposedly there is 0% chance of rain today.)

      • Tres Cool

        Gabby got a new hair-do!

      • Gender Traitor

        I must say, to her credit, Ms. Fried Eggs kept her shit together yesterday afternoon/evening during the weather hullabaloo. She’s getting to be an old hand at this.

      • UnCivilServant

        I don’t get the reference.

      • Gender Traitor

        Sorry – too local. Chief local weather goddess: McCall Vrydaghs.

      • Gender Traitor

        (I didn’t even realize – she’s from upstate NY! You may have been practically neighbors! ?)

      • UnCivilServant

        I was about to say something like “You do realize how big an area we’re talking”, but Oswego is pretty close to where I came from originally.

      • Gender Traitor

        I had an online acquaintance some years back who lived in Oswego. She said she liked singing, “Oswegooooo into the wiiiiild bluuuuue yoooonder…”

      • Not Adahn

        “You do realize how big an area we’re talking”,

        A good-sized, but not record-breaking, cattle ranch?

      • UnCivilServant

        What is the record size of a cattle ranch?

      • Grosspatzer

        33 RPM?

      • UnCivilServant

        Anyway, I’ll do some math.

        New York state is roughtly 47,000 square miles. Lets be generous and say downstate takes up 7000 of that.

        Those 40,000 square miles contain 25,600,000 acres.

        The largest cattle ranch in the world is either Anna Creek Station (6 Mil acres) or Mudanjiang City Dairy Farm (22.5 Mil Acres, but isn’t a ‘ranch’ per se). Either one is still smaller than upstate.

      • Tres Cool

        One of our local TV weather people. https://www.whio.com/author/mccall-vrydaghs/

        Recently she’s been enunciating the d-g part of her name more clearly so it doesn’t sound like ‘fried eggs’.

      • Tres Cool

        Jamie Simpson was better since he was likely shit-faced drunk on the air.

      • Gender Traitor

        Good morning, U! All well with you today?

      • UnCivilServant

        I’ve been going around hating myself because I slipped on the “eat less,” part of my diet plan.

      • Gender Traitor

        Don’t hate yourself!!! Just try to exercise a little more. For a while, at least, it may not be too hot to get in some nice walks (especially if you pick the time of day carefully. And take along your camera!)

      • Sean

        *waves*

  27. Grosspatzer

    Mornin’, reprobates!

    No need for the alarm clock this morning. Our town has a hyperactive emergency warning system; any time the NWS issues a flood warning/advisory, the system issues a robocall to residents, which in Casa Patzer means that 3 phones go off in rapid succession. Stumbled out of bed and looked out the window, all is well. As opposed to last week when waters were within 15 feet of my back door; never got a warning about that one. Glad they are spending my tax dollars wisely.

    • Lackadaisical

      I always turn my phone to airplane mode for this reason. These weather guys are out of control. Everytime it rains here it is a national emergency. Cool it, emergency managers, you’re not that important.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, ‘patzie! Sorry you were rudely awakened by a false alarm…but I guess it’s better (usually) than no alarm at all when something DOES happen.

      And congrats on your cham-peen-ship! Do you get a big, gaudy belt?

      • Grosspatzer

        Wait, did I win something? *checks upthread*

        How did that happen? Reverse dementia?

      • The Hyperbole

        You’re the Buster Douglas of Glib Quordle.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      If no warnings and relying on blind luck was good enough for our ancestors it’s good enough for us.

      • Grosspatzer

        Also dogs. Another reason humans like to keep them around.

      • Gender Traitor

        Conversely, cats keep humans around for their devoted service.

      • Gender Traitor

        …aaaaaand as if on cue, Little Black Cat plops down on my lap just when it’s time for me to go get ready for work. ***SIGH!!!***

      • Grosspatzer

        LBC is trying to tell you something. Work is overrated.

      • UnCivilServant

        And he doesn’t want you to leave.

      • Gender Traitor

        No, he most certainly does not. He followed me into the bathroom and…ummm…got on my lap again. ??

      • Gender Traitor

        (Need more BLACK cat emojis! Diversity!)

      • UnCivilServant

        ?‍? … Only one my computer’s got.

  28. Lackadaisical

    I was thinking the other day about how much Leftards love ‘consensus’. The bottom layers love it because they want to trust top men and not think for themselves, it let’s them beat part of the elite they think should control everything. The top layers love it because it is an easy way to dismiss other’s ideas and once you have so many people in prominent positions and the media it becomes easy to manufacture it, even without a conspiracy, it could organically occur.

    See: coronavirus vaccines, masks, inflation will be transitory, etc.

    You don’t need to rebut arguments, just appeal to authority.

  29. Grosspatzer

    I see there was some interesting weather over in Ohio. Glad everyone is safe.

    Why all the love for Mother Nature? Looks like she’s trying to kill everyone.

    • Tres Cool

      Our Palatial 2X-Wide™ is bonded to the earth with copious amounts of Gorilla Glue.
      I aint afraid.

      • UnCivilServant

        So the glue and that first layer of material will stay in place while the rest goes off into the wild blue yonder.

  30. Grosspatzer

    Tough one today.

    Daily Quordle 136
    4️⃣3️⃣
    8️⃣6️⃣
    quordle.com

  31. Grosspatzer

    All your data are belong to us!!!

    https://www.nj.com/education/2022/06/final-exams-canceled-in-nj-school-district-after-cyber-attack-cripples-computers.html

    Tenafly Public Schools went back to the basics this week — using overhead projectors, paper, pencils and hands-on activities in classrooms — when a ransomware attack crippled the district’s computer system.

    Instead of relying on Google Classroom for science class, kids are engaging in hands-on STEM activities, Corliss said. Students have also been intrigued by the old school overhead projectors — relics from a bygone era before dedicated computer projection systems and interactive whiteboards.

    I’m not seeing the downside here.

    • UnCivilServant

      The downside is that the students might actually learn!

    • rhywun

      hands-on STEM activities

      *faints*

      • Not Adahn

        Hands-on-stem activities all all the rage with the groomer class.

    • UnCivilServant

      That one’s over in the Mourning Lynx.